Oh, it's just a ploy, so that she (they) can keep paddling to different stories at once, both the: "he's angel that just need patience (that she doesn't have)" to propepective new parent(s), and : "he's was a devil at our house, hitting and hurting our biological children" thereby justifying giving him up for (re-)adoption... They seemingly didn't finalize the adoption, so he's wasn't really adopted in the first place, just taken from his home country to a totally different one... From another story I've got that adopted parents in the US has to take separate steps to make their child a US citizen. What's the chances the Stauffers did that..? Without a US citizenship he could face deportation back to China, a country whose language he will probably not understand by then, by the time he (Huxley) turns 18, especially if he's violent and get a criminal record... as they claim him to be. Ironically, that she (they, the Stauffers) would bring a newborn child to the same house, if he indeed (as I don't believe) is as troubled as they claim, is beyond me. But I believe little of what they claim about him (Huxley).
The height of hypocrisy! But I expect nothing from this woman she comes over as a narcissist, adopting that little boy imo was to fulfill something in her he was supposed to adore her look on her as a saviour and everyone would tell her how wonderful she was, what a great mother to take on such a special child, and of course he was a pay day for them! I find Myka nauseating she comes over so insincere she is very affected and even though she shares so much about her self and her family we do not know who she really is because everything is by design, to create a certain image or look a certain way. When she says he won’t just be returned but then that is exactly what they do she said she could not imagine life without him and that he was her baby boy, yet they gave him away they “rehomed” their child how can we believe or trust anything they say from now on! I don’t like family vlogging channels they are intrusive, unfair, unkind and inappropriate, I do not understand why anyone would do this to their children for money it is irresponsible and imo immoral! The Stauffer’s should lose their channel this was a little boys life they messed with! I really hope Huxley is happy he deserves it ❤️
Couldn't agree more with each of you. There were definitely some moments in this one that were tough to stomach. And a lot that were simply infuriating. Even just the way she spoke about how this kid was going to teach her so much... These people have kids for the wrong reasons, and I just feel terrible for the boy. They didn't do this because they had love to spare, they did this because they craved more. He deserves better, and the other kids do too.
I believe huxley loved every one but her....he as a innocent seen through her ....he didn't bow down to her like she wanted...I believe he tried...but just knew she was a fake
The biggest annoyance i have with this woman is her insistence on making it all about HER. “He’s teaching me so much”, “he’s done so much for me”, “parenting is so hard for me”. YOU are the parent, Myka. You’re supposed to be raising him. He’s your son, not your teacher.
That's a sentiment that a lot of parents of autistic children put out. Typically will describe themselves as "autism warrior mom/dad" because they think it's so noble to do what parents are expected to do for their kids. They also love blaming any bad thing their kid does on being autistic even if it's a behavior non-autistic kids do, but they feel it's such a benevolent thing to not terminate parental rights or kill them!
Our society and media like to tell us that disabled people exist to inspire/teach able people, like disabled people aren't human beings with our own needs and reasons for existing. It's dehumanizing.
This couple not only ignored advice from a professional who obviously knew better, and warned them it was going to be difficult. They instead went to one who told them what they wanted to hear. Then they bailed when they couldn't live in denial any longer. Its really just horrible.
Exactly! That’s what angers me the most, they went to a doctor who told them there’s a good chance they wouldn’t be able to care for the child but instead of listening they decided to go to a different doctor that basically just said “Oh but he’s so cute! Yeah he’ll be fine.” Like what? How immature can you possibly be?!
"And I wasn't in denial..." Yes you were. When you get told something by multiple professionals or field experts and you go against their word, that's denial. Thick headed woman...
Imagine being a kid and watching your parents give away your brother because he's "bad". Her bio kids will no doubt be emotionally damaged from this. Myka and James are in for a rude awakening when their kids group up and are able to fully grasp what they did to that boy.
I am so sorry for those children when they inevitably have mental health problems that need to be addressed, as we all do at one time or another. The internalization of this experience HAS to result in fear of their parents finding out that they have problems, too.
Big oof here. My dad threatened to give my brother away as a kid and I still remember begging him on my hands and knees not to. I think I was like eight or nine. Daddy dearest is an untreated bipolar though, so what does that tell ya
They may never actually come to their senses about that. I have a feeling their mum has a way to cover it up or explain that it was a good idea. If she teaches them that autistic people are "weird" or "broken", she might be able to stop from becoming aware of her stupidity.
@Blue .Barrymore I agree and disagree with this comment. I think she probably really pushed for this adoption and like you said, just kind of went along with her. That being said, if you both commit to something then you both need to be in it for the long run. He is just as at fault for his role in this mess. Relationships should be 50/50 and I find him just as culpable.
All “I can get credit with this exchange at least right? It’s just that it was SO expensive. I don’t need my money back but some credit WOULD be nice!” 🙄🙄🙄🙄. Like....GTFOOOOOO KAREN!! No give backsies!! Jesusssssss. 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
You realize most medical decisions are theoretical right? Its why they usually tell you to get a second opinion or to go to a specialist so they can make a guess. People act like natural medicine is evil lol. Doesn’t have 10-30 side effects per pills. Sign me up. Rather have some shaman in a tent try a few times before resulting to a doctor. One of the leading causes of death. Medical errors. Stop being a puppet for big pharma.
itll happen soon. kids are already getting pissed about photos their parents posted when they were too young to understand. family channels wont be around for much longer i suspect
Sigh adopting a child when you already have 4 would not be for youtube content. She clearly thought it was going to be a magical fantasy and that she'd have such an intense bond with the child and that it'd be so rewarding. I think that was their mistake, NOT *adopting* a child for youtube content, that's ridiculous. There's a way easier way to make more cash online - onlyfans. Or even faking a terrible event like people have done would be less effort and risk than adoption. I don't believe they adopted for that reason
You mean a trend? Because it could have if it weren't for this fuck up. Maybe other youtube family channels will have it more difficult for adoptions now.
What a flat one dimensional comment. Of course you can return a child after a longer period of time than a pair of pants, because it is a human being. Would you rather there is a "no return" policy, forcing the parents onto a child they cant handle and therefore ruining his life involuntarily? Why are you comparing a child to an object as if the same logic applies.
@mami7864Nope. She gets no credit here because she did the wrong thing in the first place by adopting him and adding to his trauma by taking him in then abandoning him again.
“He stares at people when you eat, even if theres food in front of him” that is the most obvious sign of a child who’s experienced hunger and food insecurity.
He came from an orphanage in China, a communist country with a pretty bad track record for human rights when it comes to orphaned/disabled children. I don't think we'll ever know what his early infancy was like or how he was treated, but it probably wasn't good.
@@elizabethsmith7224 Sadly true. Here in Canada there are foster homes that have been disestablished due to depriving children of basic necessities, exposing them to sexual predators, neglecting them, etc. and so many kids are forever damaged by these experiences. I wish that Myka Stauffer had been more understanding of this reality. She adopted a child from a country with a reputation for abusing and neglecting disabled children, but she found it "weird" that he would stare at them while they ate dinner and that he liked to hide himself in a closet and rock himself back and forth. Those behaviours can be telltale signs of possible trauma and past neglect. She had no idea what her adopted child's early life was like.
As someone with autism, I am overwhelmingly angered by this woman. It was quite obvious that she had no idea how to properly care for a child on the spectrum. When I had meltdowns when I was young, my mother would take me to a quiet area, comfort me to calm me down, then we’d talk through why I was upset and how to deal with the thing that had upset me better next time- keep in mind as well, I wasn’t diagnosed with autism till I was 18. My mother taught me proper coping mechanisms, and even when I had bad days, she never once stopped caring or gave up (she could get a little strict though 😅). The fact that this woman just gave up on her child makes me ill, but also grateful I have a family that is able to love, care for, and understand me
As someone that’s adopted. This woman struck a nerve with me. It’s already hard enough to grow up with a family that doesn’t look like you, and always wonder about a family history you have no knowledge about. Add neurological problems, and parents that are pieces of shit. And you aren’t going to get anything good out of it.
I struggle having a drastic opinion on the matter. As a person with autism myself, who has been diagnosed as an adult, I now see what my parents went through with me. My mom lost her health and sanity trying to understand and respond to my needs, without any help. She inherited herself a very strong saviour syndrome from her very traumatic upbringing, and any well balanced parent (as good of a parent as they could be) would have given up on me and put me in an institution. Now my parents are exhausted for life and I have to live with the inevitable guilt of having been a burden on an unprepared family. I deeply love my parents but there are sooooo many things that they did very wrong. Any undiagnosed autism (or unprepared parents) can leave to child abuse, so I definitely prefer that child being safe…. That being said, those people are so greedy and disconnected from reality, it’s infuriating.
@@lunariian oh man, I'm sorry to hear that. And I know it must be really confusing because of the whole being mostly non verbal. Stay strong there. I'd say just keep an eye out for if it's a meltdown or possibly crying due to not being able to express himself and his needs normally for that age. As my grandmother always told me, there are special people put in place in this world who have the love and patience to raise and/or adopt an individual with a disability/disabilities. It may be a challenging road up ahead, moreso than expected but you being this understanding already is the biggest step in the right direction imo.
You seem to be talking about high functioning autism which used to be called Asperger's until it was rolled into autism to take some of the stigma from that condition. I don't think it's the same thing at all. In fact all it did was further harm people with autism and fetishize the condition. Making it desirable for people who are just anti-social and/or want to mimic some of the characteristics for attention and to make excuses, as it's pretty easy to fake, IMHO. There are so many shows about idiot-savants now and people mimicking this to appear intelligent but then have an excuse for mental shortcomings. Even the poorly displayed version of it in the show Bones where the woman presents as a high functioning autistic but yet can't understand colloquialism which you would think as an autist and anthropologist she would have studied since she likes studying humans. I did and I'm a qualified archaeologist. If you can't understand colloquialisms then you can barely communicate and stand out more. My mother was an abuser who used to beat me up. I rarely had any kind of meltdown outside of a reaction to abuse for example, her coming into my room and moving my stuff around or stealing it (and no, I don't mean tidying up, I mean playing mind games). I was often beaten black and blue so I learned how to behave, but I definitely did have skin picking and other irresistible behaviours. I think that's a major difference in autism and Asperger's. The autist has no ability to stop the undesirable behaviour because he or she is not fully self aware. Whereas someone with Asperger's is excessively sentient maybe more so than others. That's why it's so difficult to be social because you would be aware of everything until the average person who actually is not. If it's a spectrum in terms of self awareness, all humans are on it.
@@cyberpilate meteorologist 1: hey it’s gonna rain, bring an umbrella myka: i don’t want to bring an umbrella ☹️☹️ i’m going to go to another meteorologist. meteorologist 2: yes it will probably rain, but it’s sunny right now! you don’t have to bring an umbrella. myka: yay! an opinion that matches what i want! i’m taking this opinion and trusting you 100%! myka when it rains: no one told me it was gonna rain 😢😢
@@cyberpilate of course! I completely agree it probably took a ton of evaluation, they even told her she would probably end up surrending him and they were right. This was an educated 'i told you so'
Seriously. My boys aren't on the spectrum, and they've had full on meltdowns. I know I looked like a horrible mother at the time, but when my middle child was 2 or 3 he would scream bloody murder in the store. Every. Single. Time. I've learned that instead of leaving or getting angry, I would ignore him and let him scream it out. He would follow me around screaming and throwing himself down and I would walk away. He would chase me of course, throwing himself down. People would give me dirty looks lol guess what? He is now 8, and top of his class with a reading level of a 6th grader, and the sweetest boy you'll ever meet.
@@samalvarez8776 I'm only now realizing how OFF I was as a young child for NOT acting out. Before I'd see people with kids that screamed and yelled and thought "why can't they be calm and patient like me at that age". Now I know it's because I was furniture or a living doll to my mother, and until my dad retired from his job I didn't even get attention. Props to you for discouraging him acting out in the store. (It's amusing that apparently kid-raising is the same strategy as parrot-handling-- ignore when they scream and adore when they don't.)
My boys are grown now and I do mini reenactments of mega meltdown at grocery stores where I had to leave a whole cart of food behind ...we laugh and we all survived 🤗 I played WITH my kids not FILM them.
In one of her old videos, 7 things to make you happy or something, she actually says to go outside and get lost in nature. So, she's certainly THAT type. Ugh.
"I want a child that seems hard to raise but isn't. I want there to be a narrative that this pairing just sorta happened and that I didn't go looking for the perfect child." What. A. Deranged. Narcissist.
Myka is narcissistic and she therefore she sees others as objects who she uses to further her own desires. She definitely uses her children as props. The fact she was actually saying Huxley "is not returnable" means she was definitely already thinking about not having him for long. For any mother to talk about how her child "is not returnable" is disturbing. She wanted Huxley because she thought he was terminally ill and she would receive a lot of sympathy, attention and validation not to mention donations if she was seen as a mother dealing with a child from China who she had adopted and was dying. Then she most likely thought after a short period after he passed she could adopt another child and go through more attention. When she learned Huxley wasn't terminally ill but autistic she didn't want to deal with his needs. We can see this with the fact she didn't bother to learn Chinese and instead made him sign which was easier for him but also meant only herself and her husband plus a few special needs teachers could understand his attempts to communicate and this made it easier for her to abuse him, including by disregarding his needs, and for others including other adults to not know what she was doing or what he wanted and needed. The duct tape on his hand is another sign of her abusive nature and not caring about his needs and she and her husband gave preferential treatment to their biological children. Once she was pregnant again and shortly after giving birth she decided she didn't want to deal with Huxley any longer so she dumped him like an unwanted animal. She's narcissistic and her husband's an enabler and both should be off social media.
I'm going to fucking say it giving her child up to be raised by another family who was better equipped to take care of him was probably the only good decision she's ever made as a mother
@@pory913 in my opinion she’s a bad mother because the motivation of the adoption was self-serving and she went ahead disregarding all advice that would have made her a better-equipped mother for the child she claimed she wanted. By letting Huxley be adopted by a new family that could accommodate Huxley’s special needs, she made a decision, for the first time, benefited the child in the long run. I think that’s what this commenter^ meant. It’d obviously have been better if she learnt to truly love and accommodate who Huxley is; but since she had grown to subconsciously resentment him and her rigidity/arrogance couldn’t allow her to change her ways/expectations, the “re-home” outcome was the lesser of the two evils. Huxley would have had a prolonged traumatising childhood if stayed with her any longer. TLDR: she’s so toxic that her removing herself from the child’s life was the best thing she did for him (after she’d already done some damage by adopting him into her careless “motherhood” to begin with).
They’re not horrible for giving him up (because he deserved way better than them), they’re horrible for their motivation for adopting him. (Content, praise/savior status, adversity, autism hashtag, etc.)
They’re horrible for giving him up as well because it is part of the entire thing. Adoption is trauma. So what they did was cause him the trauma of adoption/changing homes…. twice. All because they couldn’t listen, and were selfish.
@asmrtpop2676 tbh giving him up really was the only correct decision that they made. The damage was already done, so they could either give him up, which would induce some trauma but ultimately open him up to hopefully going to a better home, or they could have kept him, where they would continue to not be able to meet his needs while continuing to shove a camera in his face. The boy should have never been adopted by that family, but it's for the best that he was taken out of it.
@@ihatecommunism9958 Bullshit. Maybe they can kinda order me around since they feed me and give me a roof over the head, but going as far as deciding for me is kinda shitty. Legally, they have 100% the right. Morally tho, that shit isn't about to go down their way.
@@moralkombat66 It dooesnt really matter if the child consented. At that age, the parent holds power of attorney and can consent on their behalf. And Communism killed we over 100 million people. What, are you Stalin lover?
This 2 year old boy had food insecurities and her reaction was “gross, I don’t like that he looks at my husband when he’s eating” instead of being sympathetic.. says a lot about this couple. How disgusting.
Yeah and also it’s strange that she cares so much?? Like I hate being watched while I eat but… like… he’s a child? Even though I’m super sensitive to being looked at any child is totally fine because I understand that they (whether they have autism or not) just tend not to gather social things as much as older people do and may not understand that looking at people while they eat isn’t always comfortable? Doesn’t it just seem weird? That poor kid… as awful as it is that they returned him it’s probably the smartest thing they’ve ever done as parents… im a teenager with no maternal instincts or children or like a great home life and *I* know this stuff… their ignorance is not only embarrassing but absolutely vile and disgusting.
@@lemoncardboard3270 Not to mention, children learn through observation. When they're that young, they engage in looking and mimicking. They're trying to learn the only way they really can. I don't like being watched either, but for someone that young, I'm more than willing to participate in a healthy learning opportunity. Heaven knows proper manners are going out the window at an alarming rate as it is. Teaching a kiddo how to eat and behave at the table is always a good idea.
Its truly sad. You could tell from rhe very beginning that she thought of him differently than she did of her biological children. She treated him like a nuisance rather than a child, and I feel for him and how he'll progress in life with his experience with her and her family. I hope he's doing well and finally being treated like the growing child he is rather than a tumor on her thigh.
She clearly didn't believe or practice what she said online. She was saying whatever it took to get fame. If that meant positive parenting, sure she will say that ad nauseum if it makes her popular. Her only goal was attention. For her. Only for her
It's obvious this lady didn't love her adopted child from the tone of her voice. Scary to me. What seems like common sense about any two year old, she's totally missing. Who raised her other kids?
I started tearing up at the 1:02:30 mark when the "dad" said to the boy "Are you my boy?" and he started smiling widely. He is in a better equipped home thankfully, but that moment really drives home the innocence of that child and how much they toyed with it.
I was thinking that too and myka had mentioned that In the beginning hux had gravitated more toward James because he held him more in the beginning than she did.. Maybe she was jealous and resented him for that. So sad.
If I came across this couple irl I would initiate a physical confrontation. They literally treated this child differently because he wasn’t their biological child. I’m willing to bet that if it was one of their children that had autism they would have a lot more patience. P.O.S.
YES. RUclips allow it because there is money to be made since companies will jump on the band wagon and vapid idiots will watch as family channels are both relatable and aspirational. I think they are sick. Removing your child's privacy, autonomy and then immortalizing your efforts... the arrogance and disregard for your child wellbeing that these people must have...
Duct taping his thumbs, shaving his head when he doesn't want it, getting angry when he looks at you while eating, all of it is so abusive and disgusting. They are abusive parents. Disgusting.
She also fully pushed him when he was going in for a hug. Rejecting a child seeking comfort can be abusive behaviour and using physical force to reject that child? She was not treating him right at all. I'm kind of glad he might be in a place where he gets the attention and considered care he needs rather than whatever way they were treating him. But, unfortunately, it'll also be hard for him to get over this trauma too. Hopefully, he has a good life from this point on and Myka focuses on parenting the four kids she has now in a caring way.
@@laurenettrick9201 and most adopted kids go through separation anxiety that can go to very bad levels, AND the kids struggles with autism, so im guessing its even worse. it makes me furious how theyre trying to victimize themselves in this situation. i also havent finished this video but i vividly remember she once said "me and the kids (excluding *him*) are going to go upstairs in the room to spend some family time" my jaw fell to the floor... they literally only saw him as a cash grab... the whole approach about how they describe him (adoptive son, consistently said "he is my true son, never felt like her wasnt" being repeated OVER AND OVER again tend to have a different effect, signaling that he somehow is different and not her real son but "she doesnt see him as that") makes me feel really uncomfortable?
I’d also like to add that in a (now deleted) video, her husband talks about how they often put the adopted child to sleep early so that their biological kids could come snuggle in bed with them while watching a movie. Further pushing the narrative that many adopted children experience that they are not the couples “real children” and aren’t worthy of certain activities
As an autistic person who grew up feeling difficult and like a burden, Myka's words cut really fucking deep. I pray that this kid won't remember these things and is in a family that won't treat him like a chore, he deserves the world and it's infuriating to see Myka complain about basic parenting. "We didn't sign up for this 😢" then you didn't do your fucking homework! You sign up for EVERYTHING when you bring a child into your care, don't put yourself into that situation unless you're ready for it. This isn't just scummy, it's absolutely fucking tragic and I truly wish this kid the best with a family that knows what they're doing.
The “we didn’t sign up for this”, but being parents with biological children, you have no idea how your kids are going to come out. They might be healthy, disabled at birth, have a genetic condition you didn’t know both you and you’re partner were a carrier, etc. With adoption, you are literally choosing to sign up to be a parent. I hope Huxley has a chance, he’s been through so much already.
@carolinamurtha3102 christ now that I'm thinking about it, you're absolutely right. they DID sign up for this. knowing how much paperwork the adoption process involves, I'm sure they literally explicitly signed up for this dozens of times.
Myka asked for a child with special needs specifically. A doctor warned them and in one video Myka even mentioned that and she said, that this warning went in one ear and out the other. She was fully aware, that Huxley had serious health issues.
Not just that but he came from an orphanage in China. He may not have had adequate food or food may not have been guaranteed--all of that will affect him and his outlook on food. It's so frustrating, they took zero time to truly educate themselves on not just raising an autistic child, but potentially a traumatized one as well.
@@MajesticMacaroon exactly, and I feel like she potentially added to that trauma by making him think he was doing something bad for liking food 🥴 unlike a lot of parents, they were able to & made the choice to add an autistic child to their household, yet they got annoyed with him because he was acting like an autistic child?? it’s bonkers
@@connorscorner443 I agree, it’s so frustrating that they went in with zero knowledge on how to take care of him and abandoned him because of their own incompetence. It is at least reassuring to hear that he is doing well with his new family. And I hope you are doing well too, it’s no small feat to overcome past traumas 🤍
The fact that she keeps calling him ‘our son’, even after she gave him away. The second you started treating him like a burden was the second he stopped being your son. Sending him away just confirmed it.
Veeery true. FFS, I was less annoyed with my cat when he woke me up 2-6 times every night because he kept changing his mind about where he wanted to sleep. It just shows that Myka never really treated Huxley like a family member, or someone important.
Good point, but I have to disagree on one thing - that considering a child a burden makes him not one's child. That would virtually disown like ninety percent of children. It's wrong to present a child as such but all parents are thinking it.
@@Em_Elizabeth That's true to an extent but you have to note that OP said "treating your child like a burden" not thinking anything along the lines of how bothersome a child can be. Groaning about your child when they're being annoying is one thing, treating them like dirt because you're annoyed is another.
Yeah, don’t matter what medical issues they have. 2 yr olds throw fits, you’d think they know that considering that they have biological kids of their own. And more then one at that
Mommy-vloggers value their children in _precisely_ the same way that pimps value their hoes. The fucking practice should be banned by online content-hosting platforms and acknowledged as a form of felony filial abuse by governments-but, of course, there's way too much money in it for that to ever actually happen.
I believe it has been brought up to the courts in France. I believe children of influencers are now entitled to the profits from the content, at least. You can look it up as I’m not sure I’m remembering correctly. It’s not a lot but it’s a start. Now I hope more countries follow suit.
We the people of the world need to keep exposing this behavior, yes, it will happen but we have to keep pushing against people like this!! She just didn’t want a child who wasn’t “PERFECT “ 🤮. No one is PERFECT! And that is ok!! 🎉
My Angelic mother teaches Autistic kids. My mother is a rare person. She has all of the great traits of the English gene pool and no bad ones. Most of her kids are institutionalized. This lady had no business with an autistic kid. She comes across as narcissistic toward the child.
Exactly . He is a toddler and autistic. I myself am autistic, and I’m 12, and I still have meltdowns. I’m verbal, but it still is hard, even when it’s not as severe. So even if he wasn’t severe, or even autistic, he would still have a meltdown
@@5cene5pider You aren't alone, I'm a full adult and I still struggle at times not melting down. Especially when hyper-stimulated and unable to escape excessive stimulus.
I was watching this and my mom overheard the part at the end where Myka is doing the interview where she said the kid they adopted was first diagnosed with a tumor, which she thought she could handle as a cancer nurse, but when he was diagnosed with autism that meant he might never move out. My mom said “so she thought he wasn’t gonna live very long when they first adopted him and wanted sympathy views?” 🛎🛎🛎🛎
Yup and she could have gotten a autistic child naturally too and she can’t give them back so wtf why would she take him and give him the highest hopes of a home and loving family them give him back when shit goes down
As someone who has Autism, it hurts my heart to see this child be treated this way from parents who were extremely unprepared to take care of him. Filming his meltdowns and duct taping his fingers together is very horrendous and shows she really didn’t care about him like she said she did.
I also have autism and I agree. Even the way she treated him when he was having a meltdown as if he was a spoilt child trying to get attention. They took him on like a pet and then just got rid of him when he become too much. I truly hope this little boy is doing well and he actually has a family who loves him now. He deserves it.
@@rhenaravanderhaar5414 it’s especially harmful when you realize she didn’t even care about him. She says she did, but if she did she wouldn’t have put him through all of that, and listened to the professionals when they said it wasn’t a good idea. I hope the child is in a home where his needs can be met and he’s able to get the help he needs 😓
not to mention 30h a week of *ABA*. that's almost a full work week of just ABA plus normal pre-school., which is often stressful for a child on the spectrum as well. No wonder the kid was overwhelmed and tried to soothe himself. I hope where he's know people are more empathetic towards him.
It's the fact that they chose to have a baby while their severely autistic child was struggling that is telling about how money/fame hungry they were. Responsible parents delay having another child or do not have more children in the interest of their already born children all the time. You can't always have your way, and sometimes you have to take care of what you already have first. But a 'family channel' like theirs doesn't bring in the clicks unless there's a new cute baby every few years...
Absolutely! My husband and I have 2 children, our youngest is autistic. So we decided to not have anymore because both of our girls are going to need us to be more physically and emotionally available. If we have more kids we will have to divide that again...and for what? Cos we wanted more and more children? No sir! I think if we had more children then our eldest who is neurotypical would of potentially had her needs neglected because our daughter with asd requires a lot and so do babies! The behaviour of the Stauffers is narcissistic and neglectful! Disgraceful!
I agree in most cases, but for some families they have religious Hang-Ups about that. I don't understand it, but accidents happen and they don't believe in abortion and stuff.
It's so sad. That poor kid had to get used to living with these people for a while, only to be given back like an unwanted animal. I really loathe family channels, period.
Here here on the disappearance of family channels. Thankfully though the little guy seemed young enough that he'll hopefully still be able to bond and grow feeling loved without this incident affecting him too muvh hopefully. Just glad he's in a better home and environment, away from the camera and people try to make a buck off him.
Anyone else notice covid sent her over the edge? He had 30 hrs a week of behavioral therapy and private preschool...she never saw him. Then covid hit and she was stuck interacting with him and it was too much work. I agree he's better off without her but the whole situation is disgusting especially how she gushes she'll never give him away..
1. Her referreing to him as "nurse said there's nothing _wrong_ with him" and "he walks and talks like a _normal_ child" was a HUGE red flag. 2. Repeatedly saying "Are you done?" and "Are you over yourself??" at an overstimulated, overwhelmed autistic child is abusive. 3. All she ever cared about was self-aggrandizing and sainting herself, the "what disability is easier than it looks" post gave it away. 4. Her husband, though less insufferable because not on the soapbox, is disgusting and clearly resented the boy from early on.
I'm inclined to believe that James had a lot to do with the decision to adopt H because he was always in charge of the algorithm analysis aspect of the channel. Myka is not smart and she's especially bad at math.
What parent doesn't say things like "are you done" "are you over yourself?" "Be quiet before I make you be quiet" to their kid though? That's every exhausted parent. I don't like how she gave up on the boy, that I know is wrong but most of the way she raised him looks...common.
She probably wouldn't have been so 'exhausted' if she didn't make her money by using her children via recording them and posting **their** private lives for strangers to see and judge. Or, you know, had gotten him **any** of the assistance that people literally begged them to get? Giving him up would have been one thing if they hadn't literally been exploiting him, and had instead done it because they didn't understand what they were signing on for and thought that it would be easy.
I had a child at my daycare that was adopted from China. When the adoptive parents found out she was deaf and had emotional problems they gave her up. Praise God another couple who had a deaf son and were deaf teachers adopted her. They came to our daycare and taught us sign language so we could talk to her. They were a blessing for her.
@@GloomGaiGar adopting from america is a lot harder, much more expensive, and the rules are very stringent. adopting from overseas is significantly easier
I was an adopted kid who initially bounced around from home to home. Even when I finally ended up with a loving, permanent family, that fear of abandonment never went away and still follows me as an adult. Regardless of how loving his new family is, the emotional damage from re-homing cannot be so easily undone. Edit: Of course staying with an emotionally abusive family would be much worse for Huxley. I just wanted to let everyone know that you can’t fix everything by rehoming a child. Please do not adopt unless you are 100% prepared.
I’d like to give you a virtual hug 🤗 you sound good from the inside out despite everything that happened that you couldn’t control, and that’s true testament to who you really are✨
You are past right abt this. We offsprings need stability. We need our parents. Yes abandonment is a life long horrible sad feeling that sticks with us forever!! Hugs from 1 to another.
As someone who works with SEN children hearing that “are you done?” made my blood boil. People seem to not realise that if you’re not prepared to care for someone with intense special needs and commit to a life of learning you should not commit to parenthood in the first place. Parenthood shouldn’t be a gamble.
Same with him going in the cupboard, that's a totally normal thing for a severely autistic child to do. My son always goes to cupboards if things get too much for him, just leave him be as long as he's safe and happy.
yep. especially given that people had told her that he had autism and was gonna need extra care and she still just went along with it without assessing whether she’d be able to care for him or not which she clearly couldn’t
I had no training when I started working as an SEN TA and neither did a lot of my coworkers in that department (most schools in the uk don’t have special needs education requirements for SEN TA’s) and yet we all seem to have a better understanding of handling an autistic child than this woman does. It’s literally googleable.
I'm prone to believe that she actually thought, based on the information she wanted to hear and not all that was available (and based on her own statements) that she thought the child had a terminal brain tumor. For someone seeking attention and kudos, what could be a bigger sell? "You take care of him for a bit, he's covered by whatever insurance you have, and he's gone within a few years, all while you document your valiant saving of him and self-sacrifice". Talk about a double-whammy. She gets immense love for "selflessly" adopting a Chinese child with a brain tumor and will get 100x the love when he passes. Maybe it's cynical, but I don't think she "returned" him because he was autistic, but rather because he wasn't terminal.
of course you will get the worst impression possible when you watch a negative video about someone. That's the point. Do you also think she's ugly and dumb? Cause that's the only thing missing in your cynicism. People are a lot more boring than you think. But hey, everyone loves stories so you do you.
that's a very cynical, but believable think to believe Also go back on EFAP, you brought up some good psychology facts especially when it comes to video game violence, or how it doesn't cause people to be violent
@@mbt9700 I imagine you also are not a toddler and have had time to figure out how to cope. Toddlers are already tough gremlins to take care of, but children who have special needs will also act out a ton.
I wasn’t “ready for” my son’s level 3 autism either. But that’s parenthood. You don’t get to choose your child’s traits. This is how we know she thought of Hux as different than her biological children.
exactly. none of us know what we're doing. since when does autism have a manual? she didn't love that boy as much as her other babies, and that's why she just popped out another like "haha oh yeah & hux is gone." it's disgusting.
My axiety disorder was worse when I was a kid,we couldn't even go to restaurant when I was very very young because the noise would bother me so much, my parents adapted we ate most of our meals at home. They would change the TV channel every time a scary movie or scary movie trailers came on. I got better as I got older but even if I hadn't I know my parents would never abandon or give me up.
@@stephi1311 Them having another baby (presumably by choice but possibly an accident) didn't sit right with me if they were supposedly struggling so much. Why would the mom going through birth and the presence of a newborn be a good idea at that point? Like it's just taking away time and money from the existing child who she claims was costing too much time and money.
With how much she said stuff like "we would never give him up" and "we adopted a little guy from china -- definitely not a failure!" it's like..... Who's she trying to convince?
Funny that when asked about her biggest failure, she immediately thinks of her adopted son, regardless of her trying to label it as a “challenge.” She sickens me.
@@krispy857 It cracks me up that she was asked about a failure, and instead, she talked about a challenging situation that painted her in a saintly light.
@@EmeraldAshesAudio yes! At least that’s what she THINKS it sounds like to us, but as an obvious narcissist would do, is to try to say things & act in ways that she thinks might be the way someone in her position WOULD act. But many narcissist who are as obvious as she, will tend to give themselves away. She might say stuff that she claims is not her motive to do different things, when in fact it was exactly for that purpose she’s saying it wasn’t. Or, like in this instance, when asked about a failure, adoption being her response speaks volumes on what’s really going through her mind at that time. Narcissists especially, do not like to dwell on failure or even the thought that they might be one, so they will not look at anything in their life that way, therefore they never learn from their mistakes. They push blame of any type of failure onto others in their life, & they take absolutely no responsibility for their own actions...ever. She HAS admitted responsibility a couple of times pertaining to this incident, but if you hear or read when she takes that responsibility, right before &/or after she accepts it, there was mention of blame elsewhere. Whether it be on the adoption agency, the medical professionals, the other children or even the child himself. Narcissists also tend to be impulsive, even at times in life when, given the circumstances, it’s expected of them by others to act in a completely opposite way. She has major issues & the only ones suffering are the children. Unfortunately, only time will tell on how much they really endured through all of this.
yup. narcissists do this apparently where they tell you the truth about what they're really doing really early on. There's another channel where a psychologist breaks down her behavior and Myka does this a LOT. She is already having doubts and thinks that a "normal good person" would just push all those doubts aside and do it anyway, but that's actually not what "normal good people" do.
@@skylerchan7746 It sucks to hear but that doesn’t mean avoid it until you find a doctor that kisses up to you. If we bumped up the severity, like diagnosing your kid with cancer (which no parent wants to hear), and you went to other doctors for a diagnosis until one said “Yup, happy and healthy.” When the kid _did_ have cancer and you cherry-pick what you wanna hear and the kid dies because of lack of care, the parents are obviously in the wrong. Lower it down to your kid is mistreated because of lack of understanding their condition, still awful.
A lot of orphaned children have a food hoarding habit. My parents said shortly after they adopted me, i was demonstrating that behavior bypocketing the food like crazy in my cheeks and refusing to let food go-it’s because of food insecurity. As a Chinese adoptee, my blood still runs hot when I hear about Myka. She never loved that child, she loved views.
Do you know how did they help you out of that habit? I'm real curious about it! It's okay if you don't want to talk about that kind of personal stuff, though!
@@idkwhatsgoingon9723 Honestly I just grew out of it once baby me realized they were regularly feeding me and taking care of me. I still had some food hoarding problems, but them making me feel like I was provided for naturally weaned me off the behavior. They never restricted food from me either, it was just a very natural “okay, you’re safe, you have food.” I also had a cabinet that was made “mine.” Having that security helped too.
Food hoarding is a coping mechanism to deal with insecurity issues. It’s not unusual and it’s really not uncommon. I was not adopted, but I do have severe abandonment issues related to traumatic childhood experiences. In some ways, I’m a gatherer, hoarder and collector of basic things of necessity. I’m single and live alone. I don’t really eat regularly, nor do I eat large portions. But when I go grocery shopping, I usually buy way more food than I actually need, because having two or more of anything I may want or need soothes my long-enduring and deep-seated emotional injuries, and gives me a sense of security and stability, even though food insecurity was never a root problem or manifestation of my childhood issues. Myka is just a selfish, narcissistic and delusional woman, who foolishly thought she could force this special needs child to adapt to her family dynamic. She never bothered to consider that her family dynamic would likely be required to adapt to the child and his needs.
I wasnt adopted but a foster kid. When i was rescued i was literally starving to death. Weighing 28 pds at 6. I would also hoard food hiding it in my room in the form of cans. I would hide my school lunches all over the classroom at school and they would be constantly found rotten. I did this in case my foster parents stopped feeding me for being "bad" etc. Its even bled into my life as a parent also being panicky when we get low on groceries.
I know this video is nearly two years old but I just watched it today. I’ve known about the story since it became news in 2020 but I appreciated this thorough deep dive. I am an adoptive mother. My son was born with multiple heart defects, which my husband and I knew about before we decided to take him in. We knew that he would need open-heart surgery. We knew he would be in the hospital for a few weeks. What we didn’t anticipate was that he would end up having complications, he would nearly die, and he would require a four month hospital stay after which he would have lifelong developmental delays. The adoption agency didn’t anticipate that either, which is why we were asked more than once if we wanted to proceed with the adoption. Not once did we even consider backing out. Six months to the day after he came home from the hospital, my husband took his own life. So now here I was, facing single motherhood with a child who was developmentally delayed and would later be diagnosed with cerebral palsy. Again, I was told that I could back out of the adoption. Again, I never even considered it. From the moment I laid eyes on my child, I fell in love with him. And if he were my biological child I wouldn’t give him up just because things happened that weren’t anticipated. Today, he is 4 years old. He is still significantly delayed and probably always will be. I will have to spend the rest of my life caring for him because he won’t be able to care for himself. Do I regret not backing out of the adoption? Absolutely NOT. He is the light of my life. My pride and joy. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone. So I can’t muster any sympathy for the Stauffers, especially because they at least knew that Huxley had severe medical issues. Hopefully he’s now with a family who can manage his needs and will love him unconditionally the way any parent, adoptive or natural, should love their kid.
You are an amazing person for giving this child parents who love him and will never give up on him and just continue to care for him and love him as any good parent should do. I also want to say I am truly sorry about your husband. I can’t even begin to imagine how hard that was/is and become a single mother, but still doing what you can to care for all his needs. I have a lot of respect for what you do and all you’ve been through. Much love and many hugs from Alabama. ❤
I hope you and him continue to grow and thrive with endless happiness. you are stronger than many other people could ever imagine. i teared up reading this, and i wish you both the best. as much as i would love to say that i would do the same i know i wouldnt ever be able to both mentally and physically. no matter how hard it gets i hope you are able to overcome it all, being this selfless is truly a blessing.
Omg 😢 this story broke my heart, I’m so sorry you lost your husband, thank you for taking care of your baby and never turning back even though it must be so difficult. I’m sure your baby loves you more than anything in the world ❤
I am an autistic girl and use my channel to advocate for autism understanding and accommodations. It is VERY typical for an autistic child to seem developmentally on track as an infant/young toddler and to have their developmental delays show later on. If someone is warning you that your child is autistic, you need to begin preparing for that. It WILL show at some point or another, even if it is later (mine became clearest during puberty). You really need to do your research. Love is fantastic but not enough to care for an autistic child- it takes work and practice and patience. Stauffer could have done more to prepare.
It's even worse when you consider that Myka was a registered nurse. She has made claims of even working as a pediatric oncology nurse. She doesn't even have the microscopic excuse of ignorance.
I'm autistic, and while I'm on the more functioning side of the spectrum, if I had a mom that would shame me and film my "meltdowns" for the world to see like they did with their son, I'd probably be nowhere near as okay as I'm now
@@MelissaRae1975 well I'm fine, as a said above I was lucky enough to have a mom that cared and did none of the things theses people did :) thank you for your nice words tho !!
Hell yeah. What were they thinking? My son is autistic, and when he was a todler, he cried most of the time too, like this guy. I mean , he screamed crying when he nursed, because he didn't want people holding him. You just had to decide this is my child and go with it. To hear this woman claim to love her kid so much, made me want to slap her.You know, it's my son who taught me how to deal with these kind of people. He'd say, " well, he figured people would be like this anyway, and they were, so there you go." He says stuff like this all the time, and it's awesome.
You skipped over where the report states they inflicted ABA on the kid, a "therapy" that many autistic adults have spoken out about being abusive and traumatic. It could well have been the cause of increasing meltdowns and unsafe behaviours. Also 30hours of ABA for a 4yo is almost a full time job for the kid. Ridiculous.
@@little.tricks ABA stands for applied behaviour analysis, a form of "therapy" that uses positive and negative reinforcement to condition someone to act a certain way. You reward someone for desired behaviour, and punish them for undesired behaviour, and through association they are conditioned to act a certain way. In the context of autism, ABA essentially rewards autistic children for acting neurotypical (such as holding eye contact, something painful for many autistic people) and punishes them for being autistic, such as stimming or talking about their special interests. It's harmful because autistic traits aren't controllable, but are simply part of who autistic people are, yet through ABA these traits are repressed, which has a huge impact on the mental health of autistic people as it makes you have to pretend to be completely different to who you are all the time ("masking"). There's also the fact that the punishments used in ABA can be horrificly barbaric and abusive, such as yelling loudly (when many autistic people find loud noises painful), physical violence such as hitting, depriving the child of food, and in exreme cases using electric shocks (which have resulted in the murders of several autistic children due to their use). Sorry this is a long explanation, ABA is incredibly harmful yet is still held by many experts as the best way of "treating" autism, when autism isn't something to be cured or repressed.
My son had aba, it was nothing short of abuse. We ended it and my son has learned so much just by giving him understanding and not making him “work” the program. They use “statistics” to justify their abuse. I feel sick every time I see newly diagnosed kids look into aba
Just thought I’d chime in regarding ABA (Applied Behavioral Analysis) is very different than the therapy used 10+ years ago. I really wish they would change the name because it’s an umbrella term where not all therapy is created equal in this field. As an autistic myself, I have 7 autistic children and 2 actually attend ABA. I encourage people to research new therapies and learn about the techniques being used. I am in ABA as well from the same clinic and recommend it to other families. The old ABA was highly abusive and harmful and I’m sure there are centers still like that even now. But not all centers are the same and not all techniques are the same. Our ABA center has truly been a benefit for our family. We have no desire to change our autistic brains. We just want to be able to adapt to environments we find challenging. My children and I also deal with dyslexia and adhd in addition to autism, it makes some things difficult for us. But with our therapy we have been able to learn how to work through things with greater tools that level the playing field. My 12 yo and my 17 yo are in ABA and they made the decision to have this therapy. At any time they can decide it’s not for them as that is the choice I want them to make. As of now, they’ve been doing ABA for 2 and 4 years respectively. We are all different levels and require different approaches. I hope the discussion can be opened regarding ABA and that the differences in therapy can be shown so that people will be educated about it. ♥️
yes! we also wouldn't be subjected to torture like Ryan and the kaji family! My usually polite, sweet toddler started throwing things and asking for junk food after watching Ryan. She literally got addicted to him and would throw tantrum if the ads came up. She wanted the stuff they have! After two whole months of this torture, I completely stopped showing Ryan and said that nobody can find him anymore! She was really upset for two days, and then miraculously changed overnight to being a sweet, funny, polite toddler... she just watches "mouse a cookie" or "Daniel Tiger" on amazon prime now. And I love that I don't have to hear the high pitched annoying voice of Ryan's mom anymore... my ears used to hurt and I would get a headache from those horrible videos where they are just making money out of those poor kids
Child RUclipsrs need to be treated like child actors. But chances are no laws will be passed until a child RUclipsr grows up and takes their parents to court over being on RUclips from a young age.
100% . One of the worst families is A for Adley. That girl is going to have a hard time in life after seeing the whole world does not revolve around her.
Wow! I’m so pissed. She had that poor baby in the closet and put him on the internet during his sensitive time!! How disgusting! And when he runs out to her he wants a hug. His arms are out and she is probably looking through the camera and not at him so he just gets her hand. I’m sure his heart felt so heavy and he just needed to feel love. Skin to skin time and just allowing your child to FEEL your heartbeat with your chest together does SO MUXH to calm them and make them feel safe. Then he’s just sitting there on the floor crying while she says “are you done? Are you done?” that is DISGUSTING! That is NOT tough love. That’s REFUSAL OF LOVE. SmFH
I did not catch that my first go, thats messed up. The kid really wanted to get a hug from his mother, instead she gave him her hand an then scolded him. If this dumb bimbo put down the Damn Camera!
One thing that strikes me as weird is this: They were perfectly ok and willing to take on the challenges of a kid with a diagnosis of brain cancer. And I don't think the reason was because she is a "nurse dealing with cancer patients" . Brain cancer is seriously dangerous and can kill you quite easily. Maybe she thought because the doctors were so heavily against this adoption due to his condition that the cancer was severe and maybe he didn't have much time to live. In that case, she would have been hailed as a hero, a mother who adopted a child with cancer and offer him a better quality of life than any institution could have provided. But then the diagnosis was changed to autism which, although challenging, it was basically a life sentence for her. I think that's why all this happened. Although I do sound a bit paranoid, I know, I wouldn't put it past her to act in that way.
Seems harsh, but i can believe in that This "mother"... oh god, it's like she is hypercompensating for something by giving birth every 2 seconds and telling everyone around how good she is, look at me, i am a hero, remember me as a mother of 4-5 kids plus adopted one! Look how great i am at everything, Jesus Christ hold my beer
Exactly. She only wanted the clicks and the money that came with them. Maybe she has a hero complex too, thinking that her actions are so somehow justified and that she us indeed a good person.
“It is not easier with each kid… It feels harder with every single child I’ve had.” So you mean to tell me that the more children you have to raise at once the more responsibility you have and the more stress you’ll be under?! That’s so enlightening! I never would have guessed that the more helpless tiny human beings you’re responsible for the more stressful it is!
Seems to be a issue a lot of very strict religious couples have. The men just want lots of kids and don't care about the physical and emotional toll it takes on their wives.
As an adopted child from China, when I found out about this, I was shocked and appalled. Both myself and my sibling are adopted, and yes, of course we've had our own "challenges" growing up, but I know my parents did their research, were responsible, and knew what they were getting into before they decided to adopt, and be that "hero of someone else" with the whole idea of saving someone from a bad situation. They never gave up, and were prepared to take on the good, the bad and the ugly that did come with it. I have some adopted friends who have trust issues from bouncing around from orphanage to foster home to foster home, and I am absolutely disgusted at the fact that this family just got rid of him, that they gave up on him, and that they could further traumatize a CHILD.
Totallyahooman I agree with all that you said (though I wasn't adopted). It's similar to all the stories where Karens and Darrells treat workers like personal servants. Only difference: kids can't get out of the situation (dependants) or get revenge (bossy people). I feel so, so sorry for that kid. I sincerely hope that he gets adopted fast and forgets that his parents existed to have a better life in the future. As for the parents, they'll get what's coming to them. Getting thrown from the Internet is only the beginning, Karma will get them eventually.
Adopted fam. I'm adopted from russia. I was a terrible child I was always screaming and crying. I had really bad tantrums up till I was 11 and got therapy and I think that's when I cooled down. But my parents never gave up even though they now have an epileptic and no good childhood memories of me. Because I was their kid, not biologically. But they did so much to get me they wouldn't just drop me. This family disgust me
That's what I was thinking the whole time. I find this "family youtube" thing to be very disgusting. It shouldn't even be legal. But it's awesome how her stupid adoption plan to bring in me revenue did the exact opposite. It killed her channel.
yeah, thats just a low class cheap shot if u ask me I sure bet club Nientinendo with his 906 likes, would put down the controller, if he ever got laid, impregnated a girl, and fathered a severely disabled child a child with level 3 autism. with few exceptions will be institutionalized with professionals in cases where the family can afford it
@@randyrogers8201 not sure what you're asking? You think it's OK to parade children in front of a camera for a paycheck? Yeah I find that pretty gross, I think any same person would.
Several people have theorised that the Stauffers really examined the RUclips algorithms, and that may have contributed to choosing a foreign child with a marked disability, as they saw it.
@@nancyjay790 ofc yt now a days has become more of a investment than hobby turned profession people take topic study for months then bring big investment to blow.
As someone with a little brother on the spectrum, I've noticed several parents who have children with autism that they don't understand that their "tantrums" are not that. They have so much more difficulty expressing how they feel. My brother didn't start speaking at all until age 6. Trying to exist without being able to communicate your feelings about things as a child isn't them throwing a tantrum. It's them being frustrated that they can't tell you what they want or how they feel. They get overstimulated really easily, especially stage 3. It's not easy to parent a child on the spectrum, but they need to understand that it's never going to be easy. But, they're still your kid.
I am considered to have mild autism, but I used to have meltdowns all the time and still do sometimes. It is horrible to experience, but my grandma always knew what to do as she worked on a sped bus. I couldn’t really communicate at all as a kid, sometimes I resorted to scratching myself and screaming because I didn’t know how to say I needed help. I still do the same thing, but quieter now because it’s still so hard to ask for help. I agree with you a lot.
exactly. I get why myka gets the most hate in this situation since she is the owner and "host" of the channels dedicated to the family and responded to the uproar by herself on some platforms (instagram I think). but it's not fair to out just myka's name in titles and threads when james had just as much responsibility as a parent off screen or not.
As an autistic, this case really got to me. It makes me angry how Myka was talking about H. having tantrums to "get his way" with eating. The kid was from an orphanage! And he probably didn't have the ability yet to see things in a timeframe! So for him, eating is now or never - who knows if and when you'll get your next meal. And how she says "are you over yourself?!"... Infuriating.
yeah, it really irritated me too. I'm studying developmental psychology right now and regardless of autism it'd be reasonable for a child to still operate based on their former environment with likely no secure attachments. So it becomes extra heartbreaking knowing that H. probably understands her and the situation even less than a young child at that age, and that it's NORMAL for children at that age to throw tantrums. They're not doing it to be "disobedient", it's because they're still learning how human interaction works.
@Toeps Even if a child doesn’t have developmental problems I still hate this kind of verbal interaction between adult and child. As a kid adults that talked like “are you over yourself” whenever I lightly disagreed with them or was legitimately upset made me feel like less shit. Like why is your method for de-esculating a situation basically egging the child on with something you have to know could make them be more upset???
Its a pity you missed some stuff: Myka has a history of buying pets and giving them back, SHE WAS A NURSE who was FIRED for ATTACKING A PREGNANT COWORKER, and a lot of other shit :/// EDIT: Oof didn't expect this to get any attention lmao. If you want more info on the patterns and character of Myka (in particular) then check out Without a Crystal Ball, who does serious digging into her past via her social media, and Live Abuse Free, who points out Myka's narcassistic behaviors. I understand that TRO only has so much time to go into things in his videos, but I feel he was way too charitable to Myka :( EDIT EDIT: while I haven’t looked into it myself, take Without a Crystal Ball’s stuff with a grain of salt, someone has brought to my attention that she may not be a trustworthy source. Always double check your sources kids!
She was also known by friends and family to be like... really fame hungry? And would jump on any trend she could to get attention. There’s a sizable number of people that know her irl that suspected she only adopted H for the attention.
Is there concrete evidence for this? I'm not defending her whatsoever! I just have heard this floating from drama channel to drama channel, and sometimes its unreliable.
Honestly, given how trash they were, if this were their biological son i have no doubt they would still have tried to get rid of him as much as they legally could (palming him off on grandparents, babysitters etc). They were simply not willing to raise a disabled child.
@@jazzycat8917 you’re right. They might have put the child in the system as well and “cried” about how they thought they were ready for a 5th child but “simply weren’t” and had to “rehome” the child.
Her child my foot, her child till the copper rule came out on RUclips making it harder to monetize the chuld..but arill had the work of raising said child,...if someone labels a child with a crazy name for me the red flags go up...
Rule #1 of caring for children with ASD: NEVER treat a meltdown like a neurotypical temper tantrum. They aren't a brat, they just haven't fully developed the tools they need to advocate for themselves yet. It's just a frustrating for them as it is for you.
Exactly! that’s something I had to learn very fast taking care of my little brother with asd Even at 13 I could recognise that his thinking was different to his other siblings and neuro typical people and I can’t grasp how full grown ADULTS can’t do the most basic research
I had 2 main thoughts while watching this: 1. She doesnt understand the difference between melt downs and temper tantrums (she seems to use them interchangeably) and 2. She used fucking ABA therapy??? No wonder he was having so many "problems". As another comment said, the best the she ever did was "rehome" him with someone who was capable of taking care of his needs. "I put my kid into an abusive therapy daily and theyre acting up. I wonder why?"
exactly, he was trying his damn hardest to communicate with her. if your child is melting down so fucking much that you have to cut him out of most of the blogs like she said, then something is EXTREMELY wrong with the situation and he is being extremely distressed and upset. he’s not trying to ruin her vlogs or “test her family” he’s trying to say something. he’s trying to use his voice and you’re silencing him and putting him even more emotional destress.
@@catnbearsavedaworld it's the same reason why everyone cries as a baby! We don't know how else to communicate that we need something, especially when we're the ones who don't quite know what we need yet. We just know something is wrong. The sound may be unpleasant, but it's incredibly important to pay attention to. You'll miss something if you don't.
I too have been adopted, not only that, I have been “returned”! A foster family I was in before my forever family came into the picture, found some issue with me I have never been able to understand felt it was best to returned me to the orphanage center. You don’t forget that. Ever. The nightmare of looking out the family car window one night and seeing the place you thought you had escaped from forever. Haunts me to this day. And mine was a private affair. Imagine all that but set to a world wide platform. Oh I hope this dear child is somewhere he is unconditionally loved and treasured and never ever shown this or any of her videos.
I was a foster child myself so I understand the feeling of "this is my home & family now" and also the feeling of "why did they get rid of me? What's wrong with me? Did I do something wrong? Please don't leave me." You get used to it after you get passed around multiple homes and kicked out before 18 (you'd be surprised how often that happens). I can't imagine how it feels to know you were adopted tho. Being a foster kid, you always have the knowledge in the back of your head that "I could be tossed at anytime" or being threatened to be tossed away again by the foster parents own mouths. You think that being adopted would be a forever thing, but I guess not. 😰💔
@@crazyphan18 he’s in a new home now and the police have confirmed that there are no signs of abuse and he’s completely safe and happy and everything is legal. He’s even calling his new adoptive mother ‘momma’
@@kiarapinto8884 there are no PHYSICAL signs of abuse. Funny thing about abuse and ptsd, to survive you push that shit down and it goes dormant until something unlocks it. I have been in therapy since I was taken away from biological family at the age 8, but I got progressively worse as I got older, it’s only in my late 20’s have I have to terms with what happened to me and who I am because of it.
I’m not mad at her for giving up her son to a family that’s better equipped to take care of him and his needs… I’m mad at her because she knew what she was getting into and blatantly chose to ignore the advice given to her by actual medical professionals, and now this child has to deal with the repercussions of that.
The only time this chick even really cries is when she talks about HER struggle...eyes remain dry as the Sahara when she talks about the baby...we see through you lady
I don't like when people try to diagnose others over RUclips videos but I think you are correct. She needs therapy not another kid. I'm a schizophrenic and I know I wouldn't be able to care for a kid but that's the problem with narcissists, they think they are gods.
He buys subscribers and they made a LLC for his channel so H. can't sue them. They are horrible through and through. Their other kids needs to be rehomed asap
@@angelikalaser7778 what the fuck... that’s disgusting. The fact that H possibly suing them has already crossed their minds just goes to show they know they fucked up.
My cousin adopted two boys from Bangladesh and they were very insecure about the prospect of having food. Of just being able and allowed to eat until they're not hungry anymore, it took some time for them to realize that food was not gonna be taken away from them. Its really hard for children who come from poverty or similar situations.
@Death Omen then he should be used to not eating, you guys are harping on the one thing that she actually got right. Once you develop bad eating habits, it's hard to change. Do you think a kid with super-tism is going to have that sort of self-control?
@@KameSennin4209 You're right. I know a couple who adopted 2 kids from Eastern Europe, I think a Ukrainian orphanage or a similar place. They would overeat bc they were used to being hungry, & the doctors told the parents to only let them eat a certain amount of food at a time & on a schedule until they adjusted. They were ages 3 & 6 when they came to the US. Now they're teens & perfectly fine
You guys notice anytime she's showing the kid any affection she looks into the camera to make sure it's catching it like "see look im such a good mom". She gives off an evil vibe like she was cruel to him off camera.
What catches me off guard. Is she doesn't blur her kids face's, both Huxley and her bio kids, given the complete and simple fact kids can't give concent, it doesn't matter if the kids wanted to be recorded like how they where in the videos, she and her husband is they're parents, they should know this. Idk how Huxley is able to be blurred when her bio kids weren't. But its clear to say, she attempted to love Huxley, but extremely failed in doing so, sense I have a baby brother similar to Huxley's diagnosis (He's my bio brother), and last time I checked you don't tape their hands to a wall cuz they kept sucking on they're thumb, let alone with any kid, especially when you had completely no problem with the other kid does the same at the same age as the other one. its a clear sense of faveritizm to me.
There's a REALLY illuminating interview of her where she actually admits that she adopted him thinking he had a brain tumor and wouldn't live long; this is when she wasn't considering "rehoming" him yet. I'm paraphrasing but she said something along the lines of "now I might have this autistic child in my life for the rest of my life". Nauseating and shows how calculated she is. She has nursing training and wanted to have a kid who would die so she'd be the white saviour who "gave him a good few years out of the kindness of her heart and is devasted by the loss and needs sympathy" type situation🤢🤮 She also said she planned on adopting an African kid next, like some kind of collector ok I have to stop or I'm gonna barf omg 🤮
She was okay with it being a brain tumor or cancer because that came with increased odds that he might die. That would have been great for views AND would have made sure he wasn't around too long. Did you hear her? "That might mean he lives with me forever." said with disgust. She never planned to keep him.
That interview was illuminating, nauseating and shows how calculated she is. She has nursing training and wanted to have a kid who would die so she'd be the white saviour who "gave him a good few years out of the kindness of her heart and is devasted by the loss and needs sympathy" type situation🤢🤮 She also said she planned on adopting an African kid next, like some kind of collector ok I have to stop or I'm gonna barf omg 🤮
The way myka punished the child for having melt downs makes me so sick and angry to this day. He was punished for trying to communicate, for struggling, for being uncomfortable, for being hungry. She continues to say "it's the principal of the thing we don't throw a fit to get our way" BUT HE PHYSICALLY CANNOT COMMUNICATE IN ANY OTHER WAY. Ugh this is old and my comment does nothing I just get angry listening to get talk to that child.
Right?? Complaining about the kid "wanting to get his way" with the bio kids on the lap, while H was in the rug, and the "parents" were being mean to him. Poor baby 🥺
If she has birthed this boy should probably wouldn’t have “rehomed” him. Special needs parents AREN’T experts. We have to go through all the struggles as we learn to raise a special needs child. She did a fantastic job alienating the special needs community. All she did was manage to harm that child even more. That child is going to have further attachment issues due to her actions.
nah i think she would have gotten rid of him even if he was her bio kid. she’s ableist as hell. she clearly see disabled people as inspiration porn and a way to get clickes.
Kate Gosslin sent her own son to an insitution because he wouldnt yeild to her narcisism..Myka reads simmilar to Kate, she probbaly WOULD get ride or institutionalize a bio child with the same condition.
I know a taxi driver who is taking care of an autistic child that their family picked up abandoned by a riverside. That child's mother specifically left that kid their to roll off and drown. It's a miracle the taxi driver's mother happened upon her and picked her up. Biological parents can be just as worse.
They couldn't provide adequate care so they relinquished custody of him for someone who could. There are so many stories that end in real tragedy where people comment "they should have given her/him to someone who would love him!!"
I think he will be okay. If he is getting love and attention in his new home, which I’m sure he is. I hope he forgets all about these sick people. I hope he gets all the love and support every child deserves.
Already deciding that you are going to adopt a specific ethnicity before you even start the process rubs me the wrong way. Adoption isn't a build a bear for kids...
I have no way to back this up, but if I remember right one of the drama channels ( not sure which dad challenge maybe) dug up a blog post or something like that where they were looking through the options. The basic understanding seemed to be that China was the only country that would approve them. Just on the face of things they already had a large family, the finances are incredibly unstable etc.
i’m adopted as well and when my mom adopted me, she met a woman who also eventually sent back the child she adopted (because she managed to fall pregnant and she found herself loving her biological child more.) being adopted comes with a lot of emotional turmoil that, unless you’re adopted too, not a single person understands. the way these sort of people just give back a child and possess such a severe lack of understanding of the emotional impact they’ve just inflicted on a tiny person by doing this, on top of the existing emotional and developmental trauma, horrifies me to my core.
What angers me most is that she was adamantly told about the potential difficulty she may have raising him, but totally ignored it and now he is paying the price.
It will known as RUclipsr consent abuse , these children would be allowed to litigate RUclips and their parents for using their image without any consent . I have four kids , 22,20 ,18 & 6 , all are asked before any photo or detail of their lives are shared on social media . Asking a child a question if ‘they are done ?’......when the child is upset and confused and already emotionally scarred plus he has autism ..... Autistic children don’t know how to communicate , hence “ fit” or “ meltdown” , you make sure that you are constantly supervising and praising their good behavior .....DON’T have kids , adopted or naturally breed unless you are selfless and empathetic, and extremely patient and have money to literally burn ! I got off Facebook from all the over sharenting......
@@theoracletempleoflovelight2222 I love everything you said, but can you explain one thing: are you saying fits/meltdowns are exclusive to children with autism? I don’t think you are, but I wanted to be certain I understood you.
What gets me is how she expected nobody to notice or care when their adopted son just....disappeared from the vlogs and Myka's profile changed from "mother of 5" to "mother of 4". She honestly expected her viewers to forget about that poor boy's existence just as easily as she and her shitty husband did.
While we dont know what happened to the kid, TRO has brought us the information that will allow the viewer to form their opinion and spread it to other Myka viewers. Even if the kid doesnt see it, the people will put her down(verbally, of course). After that, we can only watch and wait
I feel like all her videos about this adoption were all blatant attempts to convince herself she’s a good, noble, person. Makes me angry. The little boy isn’t a toy you can just throw away once you’re done with it 🤬
Its so gross thst these parents gave this child a different bedtime so their biological children could spend quality time with the parents. Thats so fucked up
@@trcykaufman yeah, I dont have the clip. They have deleted a lot of content regarding the child but it was in one of the videos exposing them. And I agree its disgusting how they use their children like this
As an adoptee and a person with a disability I can agree with this creator my mom knew what she was getting into and gave me all the treatment and more importantly love I needed to grow into the man I am today to quote my mom on why she adopted me "I just say two great kids and wanted them. In short my mom adopted me and my sister out of love not out of any gain for herself and I will always be grateful for that.
Exactly. A boy his age is still learning how to understand the world and develop relationships. The fact that they did this to him, a child with ASD, specifically makes it ten times worse. Individuals with ASD often find comfort and security in repetition, familiarity, and a set structure. Suddenly taking all that away can be really distressing and confusing. But doing that with an entirely new family on top of that? They might as well have just pulled a rug out from under him! It'd be more like a miracle if he DIDN'T have attachment issues after that.
It's true But relinquishment/adoption already guarantees developmental problems. Separation from the biological mother causes a small child to go into a chronic state like 'fight or flight'- interrupting development. It's why many of us struggle with mental health and learning disabilities. In fact, we commit suicide at a rate 4 times greater than non-adoptees. But to be relinquished *again*... *shakes head sadly. I wish this boy every good thing.
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Interesting vid
1st reply
When we needed the British commentary man most, he returned to us
Nice
thanks for all your hard work on the vid everybody!!
"Please respect our privacy" said the mommy vlogger not respecting the privacy of her kids...
Oh, it's just a ploy, so that she (they) can keep paddling to different stories at once, both the: "he's angel that just need patience (that she doesn't have)" to propepective new parent(s), and : "he's was a devil at our house, hitting and hurting our biological children" thereby justifying giving him up for (re-)adoption... They seemingly didn't finalize the adoption, so he's wasn't really adopted in the first place, just taken from his home country to a totally different one... From another story I've got that adopted parents in the US has to take separate steps to make their child a US citizen. What's the chances the Stauffers did that..? Without a US citizenship he could face deportation back to China, a country whose language he will probably not understand by then, by the time he (Huxley) turns 18, especially if he's violent and get a criminal record... as they claim him to be. Ironically, that she (they, the Stauffers) would bring a newborn child to the same house, if he indeed (as I don't believe) is as troubled as they claim, is beyond me. But I believe little of what they claim about him (Huxley).
The height of hypocrisy! But I expect nothing from this woman she comes over as a narcissist, adopting that little boy imo was to fulfill something in her he was supposed to adore her look on her as a saviour and everyone would tell her how wonderful she was, what a great mother to take on such a special child, and of course he was a pay day for them! I find Myka nauseating she comes over so insincere she is very affected and even though she shares so much about her self and her family we do not know who she really is because everything is by design, to create a certain image or look a certain way.
When she says he won’t just be returned but then that is exactly what they do she said she could not imagine life without him and that he was her baby boy, yet they gave him away they “rehomed” their child how can we believe or trust anything they say from now on! I don’t like family vlogging channels they are intrusive, unfair, unkind and inappropriate, I do not understand why anyone would do this to their children for money it is irresponsible and imo immoral! The Stauffer’s should lose their channel this was a little boys life they messed with! I really hope Huxley is happy he deserves it ❤️
And posts their entire life for the internet to see.
Couldn't agree more with each of you. There were definitely some moments in this one that were tough to stomach. And a lot that were simply infuriating. Even just the way she spoke about how this kid was going to teach her so much... These people have kids for the wrong reasons, and I just feel terrible for the boy. They didn't do this because they had love to spare, they did this because they craved more. He deserves better, and the other kids do too.
I believe huxley loved every one but her....he as a innocent seen through her ....he didn't bow down to her like she wanted...I believe he tried...but just knew she was a fake
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A man of culture I see
She’s a “oh you’re depressed? Just stop being sad” type of person.
"Just go outside and exercise."
"Hey hunny wanna become your own boss 😃 Just join my pyramind scheme" vibes
"Just drink water."
"Afraid to die? Just dont die lol"
you're homeless? just buy a house
The biggest annoyance i have with this woman is her insistence on making it all about HER. “He’s teaching me so much”, “he’s done so much for me”, “parenting is so hard for me”. YOU are the parent, Myka. You’re supposed to be raising him. He’s your son, not your teacher.
That's a sentiment that a lot of parents of autistic children put out. Typically will describe themselves as "autism warrior mom/dad" because they think it's so noble to do what parents are expected to do for their kids. They also love blaming any bad thing their kid does on being autistic even if it's a behavior non-autistic kids do, but they feel it's such a benevolent thing to not terminate parental rights or kill them!
This is exactly what I found odd even before TRO talks about how she rehomed her son. It just seems so self-centered and hypocritical :/
I really hate how she frames everything as "it will be worth it in the end". Worth it for whom? for her? what is the worth, Myka? you're a _parent_ .
Our society and media like to tell us that disabled people exist to inspire/teach able people, like disabled people aren't human beings with our own needs and reasons for existing. It's dehumanizing.
Exactly! There is a total lack of trying to empathize with her child or understand what he's experiencing or going through.
This couple not only ignored advice from a professional who obviously knew better, and warned them it was going to be difficult. They instead went to one who told them what they wanted to hear. Then they bailed when they couldn't live in denial any longer. Its really just horrible.
Idc about them im just so hurt for that cute baby he is truly adorable they didnt deserve him
@@tamanone7918 I agree
Just sounded had a "Jesus will sort us out" feel to it. Always a red flag.
Exactly! That’s what angers me the most, they went to a doctor who told them there’s a good chance they wouldn’t be able to care for the child but instead of listening they decided to go to a different doctor that basically just said “Oh but he’s so cute! Yeah he’ll be fine.” Like what? How immature can you possibly be?!
"And I wasn't in denial..."
Yes you were. When you get told something by multiple professionals or field experts and you go against their word, that's denial. Thick headed woman...
Imagine being a kid and watching your parents give away your brother because he's "bad". Her bio kids will no doubt be emotionally damaged from this. Myka and James are in for a rude awakening when their kids group up and are able to fully grasp what they did to that boy.
Or fear/dislike them when they think they will be given away as well
I am so sorry for those children when they inevitably have mental health problems that need to be addressed, as we all do at one time or another. The internalization of this experience HAS to result in fear of their parents finding out that they have problems, too.
@@juliejunkyardx agreed, they were already set up to fail in the mental health department the minute their parents decided to roll cameras.
Big oof here. My dad threatened to give my brother away as a kid and I still remember begging him on my hands and knees not to. I think I was like eight or nine. Daddy dearest is an untreated bipolar though, so what does that tell ya
They may never actually come to their senses about that. I have a feeling their mum has a way to cover it up or explain that it was a good idea. If she teaches them that autistic people are "weird" or "broken", she might be able to stop from becoming aware of her stupidity.
She returned that kid like he was a bad Christmas present with the receipt still attached
KEEP WAITING FOR THE REFUND SWEETHEART
XC
@Blue .Barrymore I agree and disagree with this comment. I think she probably really pushed for this adoption and like you said, just kind of went along with her. That being said, if you both commit to something then you both need to be in it for the long run. He is just as at fault for his role in this mess. Relationships should be 50/50 and I find him just as culpable.
Poor baby
All “I can get credit with this exchange at least right? It’s just that it was SO expensive. I don’t need my money back but some credit WOULD be nice!” 🙄🙄🙄🙄.
Like....GTFOOOOOO KAREN!! No give backsies!! Jesusssssss. 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
Yup the father is at fault too
Let’s not forget that the husband also adopted this child and acted as a legal guardian in this situation and should be held equally accountable
YES thank you. like yes she’s the only one posting and talking about it, but he’s a parent too? it sounds like she did so much of it herself.
She is the human embodiment of "Live, Laugh, Love" sign. Like a young wine mom using essential oils instead of proper medical treatments.
And ABA "therapy" of course. The Autism Mom(tm) classic.
@@ItsMeBarnaby 15:24 w/ her fake crying 😤
You realize most medical decisions are theoretical right? Its why they usually tell you to get a second opinion or to go to a specialist so they can make a guess. People act like natural medicine is evil lol. Doesn’t have 10-30 side effects per pills. Sign me up. Rather have some shaman in a tent try a few times before resulting to a doctor. One of the leading causes of death. Medical errors.
Stop being a puppet for big pharma.
@@Titantitan001 you do know what scientific theories are, right? Like, what the word "theory" means in that context
Yeah the one who is going to show you how you can live the "perfect"life lol The PerFect mother
I can’t wait for the generation of vlog children that disown their parents for being exploited and never really seeing any of that money.
itll happen soon. kids are already getting pissed about photos their parents posted when they were too young to understand. family channels wont be around for much longer i suspect
@Egg T are you high or just a bot? You're in almost all of these comments and I can't make sense of what you mean in any of them
If it happened with Jackie Coogan during the silent film era then it'll happen with this as well.
@@Romanticoutlaw bot!
Agree
Why does it legit feel like she was trying to create an “adoption aesthetic”
Because she was.
she got that savior complex
It pisses me off because I am adopted
Sigh adopting a child when you already have 4 would not be for youtube content. She clearly thought it was going to be a magical fantasy and that she'd have such an intense bond with the child and that it'd be so rewarding. I think that was their mistake, NOT *adopting* a child for youtube content, that's ridiculous. There's a way easier way to make more cash online - onlyfans. Or even faking a terrible event like people have done would be less effort and risk than adoption. I don't believe they adopted for that reason
You mean a trend? Because it could have if it weren't for this fuck up. Maybe other youtube family channels will have it more difficult for adoptions now.
You can’t return a pair of pants to Walmart after 30 days but you can return a child after 2 years.
Damn…
Damn. I didn’t think of it like that. Fucking terrible
that's just what he was to them, a shiny thing that is in fashion. I hope he has the best life now.
What a flat one dimensional comment. Of course you can return a child after a longer period of time than a pair of pants, because it is a human being. Would you rather there is a "no return" policy, forcing the parents onto a child they cant handle and therefore ruining his life involuntarily?
Why are you comparing a child to an object as if the same logic applies.
@mami7864Nope. She gets no credit here because she did the wrong thing in the first place by adopting him and adding to his trauma by taking him in then abandoning him again.
I can't imagine being those kids, who have every moment of their waking life being recorded and uploaded for millions of people to see and judge.
it’s not a good video if justin doesn’t have smth to say about it
Kids have to deal with that in school already jesus.
The fact they will view being recorded and judged for millions to see as normal is sad.
@@tompossessed1729 The difference to me it seems, is that your caregiver is exploiting you - so trust is automatically out of the window.
I agree Justin
“He stares at people when you eat, even if theres food in front of him” that is the most obvious sign of a child who’s experienced hunger and food insecurity.
Treating him like a dog
He could also like food. It depends. But in this instance I 100% agree.
He came from an orphanage in China, a communist country with a pretty bad track record for human rights when it comes to orphaned/disabled children. I don't think we'll ever know what his early infancy was like or how he was treated, but it probably wasn't good.
It's kind of common unfortunately some orphanages even past foster homes can be suprisingly abusive.
@@elizabethsmith7224 Sadly true. Here in Canada there are foster homes that have been disestablished due to depriving children of basic necessities, exposing them to sexual predators, neglecting them, etc. and so many kids are forever damaged by these experiences. I wish that Myka Stauffer had been more understanding of this reality. She adopted a child from a country with a reputation for abusing and neglecting disabled children, but she found it "weird" that he would stare at them while they ate dinner and that he liked to hide himself in a closet and rock himself back and forth. Those behaviours can be telltale signs of possible trauma and past neglect. She had no idea what her adopted child's early life was like.
"..his our boy. Were not gonna return him..." this, didn't age that well
Aged like milk 🥛 😒
He's our boy, we're not giving him up my ass
That's when we knew that's exactly what she was going to do...
When someone says they're "not" going to do something, its a pretty clear sign of being in denial. Or dishonesty.
aged like Milk
As someone with autism, I am overwhelmingly angered by this woman. It was quite obvious that she had no idea how to properly care for a child on the spectrum. When I had meltdowns when I was young, my mother would take me to a quiet area, comfort me to calm me down, then we’d talk through why I was upset and how to deal with the thing that had upset me better next time- keep in mind as well, I wasn’t diagnosed with autism till I was 18. My mother taught me proper coping mechanisms, and even when I had bad days, she never once stopped caring or gave up (she could get a little strict though 😅). The fact that this woman just gave up on her child makes me ill, but also grateful I have a family that is able to love, care for, and understand me
As someone that’s adopted. This woman struck a nerve with me. It’s already hard enough to grow up with a family that doesn’t look like you, and always wonder about a family history you have no knowledge about. Add neurological problems, and parents that are pieces of shit. And you aren’t going to get anything good out of it.
I struggle having a drastic opinion on the matter. As a person with autism myself, who has been diagnosed as an adult, I now see what my parents went through with me. My mom lost her health and sanity trying to understand and respond to my needs, without any help. She inherited herself a very strong saviour syndrome from her very traumatic upbringing, and any well balanced parent (as good of a parent as they could be) would have given up on me and put me in an institution. Now my parents are exhausted for life and I have to live with the inevitable guilt of having been a burden on an unprepared family. I deeply love my parents but there are sooooo many things that they did very wrong. Any undiagnosed autism (or unprepared parents) can leave to child abuse, so I definitely prefer that child being safe….
That being said, those people are so greedy and disconnected from reality, it’s infuriating.
@@lunariian oh man, I'm sorry to hear that. And I know it must be really confusing because of the whole being mostly non verbal. Stay strong there. I'd say just keep an eye out for if it's a meltdown or possibly crying due to not being able to express himself and his needs normally for that age. As my grandmother always told me, there are special people put in place in this world who have the love and patience to raise and/or adopt an individual with a disability/disabilities. It may be a challenging road up ahead, moreso than expected but you being this understanding already is the biggest step in the right direction imo.
You seem to be talking about high functioning autism which used to be called Asperger's until it was rolled into autism to take some of the stigma from that condition. I don't think it's the same thing at all. In fact all it did was further harm people with autism and fetishize the condition. Making it desirable for people who are just anti-social and/or want to mimic some of the characteristics for attention and to make excuses, as it's pretty easy to fake, IMHO.
There are so many shows about idiot-savants now and people mimicking this to appear intelligent but then have an excuse for mental shortcomings. Even the poorly displayed version of it in the show Bones where the woman presents as a high functioning autistic but yet can't understand colloquialism which you would think as an autist and anthropologist she would have studied since she likes studying humans. I did and I'm a qualified archaeologist. If you can't understand colloquialisms then you can barely communicate and stand out more.
My mother was an abuser who used to beat me up. I rarely had any kind of meltdown outside of a reaction to abuse for example, her coming into my room and moving my stuff around or stealing it (and no, I don't mean tidying up, I mean playing mind games). I was often beaten black and blue so I learned how to behave, but I definitely did have skin picking and other irresistible behaviours. I think that's a major difference in autism and Asperger's. The autist has no ability to stop the undesirable behaviour because he or she is not fully self aware. Whereas someone with Asperger's is excessively sentient maybe more so than others. That's why it's so difficult to be social because you would be aware of everything until the average person who actually is not. If it's a spectrum in terms of self awareness, all humans are on it.
i have autism too so i completely agree.
Someone give the first doctor a raise for calling it
“Yo this brain scan looks troubling, this’ll be difficult to deal with”
“Nahhhh lol it’ll be fine”
...it would not, in fact, be fine
The first doctor was honest and she would not listen. It's not so much 'calling it' but just saying 'hey, it's raining outside, take an umbrella'.
@@cyberpilate meteorologist 1: hey it’s gonna rain, bring an umbrella
myka: i don’t want to bring an umbrella ☹️☹️ i’m going to go to another meteorologist.
meteorologist 2: yes it will probably rain, but it’s sunny right now! you don’t have to bring an umbrella.
myka: yay! an opinion that matches what i want! i’m taking this opinion and trusting you 100%!
myka when it rains: no one told me it was gonna rain 😢😢
@@cyberpilate of course! I completely agree it probably took a ton of evaluation, they even told her she would probably end up surrending him and they were right. This was an educated 'i told you so'
They deadass went doctor shopping huh
The “tantrums” she showed him having weren’t even tantrums. He was literally just crying, not screaming, not throwing anything, just crying.
Seriously. My boys aren't on the spectrum, and they've had full on meltdowns. I know I looked like a horrible mother at the time, but when my middle child was 2 or 3 he would scream bloody murder in the store. Every. Single. Time. I've learned that instead of leaving or getting angry, I would ignore him and let him scream it out. He would follow me around screaming and throwing himself down and I would walk away. He would chase me of course, throwing himself down. People would give me dirty looks lol guess what? He is now 8, and top of his class with a reading level of a 6th grader, and the sweetest boy you'll ever meet.
Right, regular kid behavior
@@samalvarez8776 I'm only now realizing how OFF I was as a young child for NOT acting out. Before I'd see people with kids that screamed and yelled and thought "why can't they be calm and patient like me at that age". Now I know it's because I was furniture or a living doll to my mother, and until my dad retired from his job I didn't even get attention.
Props to you for discouraging him acting out in the store. (It's amusing that apparently kid-raising is the same strategy as parrot-handling-- ignore when they scream and adore when they don't.)
Yes, he seemed just sad and needed comford and a tight hug and food! Poor thing, Myka and James are horrible human beeings.
My boys are grown now and I do mini reenactments of mega meltdown at grocery stores where I had to leave a whole cart of food behind ...we laugh and we all survived 🤗 I played WITH my kids not FILM them.
I hate her going on and on about what he’ll teach her. He’s a kid, he exists beyond what he can do for you and your personal growth
yeah i couldn't decide why that bit was rubbing me the wrong way but that's definitely it
not if ur a narc🤷
fr, you can definitely learn from your kids but that’s not their sole purpose
its all her her her
I hope she learned to not be a clown
The way he smiled and got all excited when dad said “are you my boy?” Broke my heart. This poor baby is going to need so much therapy as he grows.
The way they refuse to refer to him as anything but “little guy” or “boy” makes my skin crawl. It feels like a huge wall between them.
@@aromaladyellieok I thought it was just me. Like I call my son by his name along with his nicknames. But their wording gave me itchy skin
she has the "the only good anti depressant is going outside" vibe
Ah yes the "travel to a new location if you're deppressed" types. Slap them.
Oh i hate those people
In one of her old videos, 7 things to make you happy or something, she actually says to go outside and get lost in nature. So, she's certainly THAT type. Ugh.
Exercise can help with depression though
@@bennygohome4576 it can but not always. I know it doesnt help me very much
"I want a child that seems hard to raise but isn't. I want there to be a narrative that this pairing just sorta happened and that I didn't go looking for the perfect child."
What. A. Deranged. Narcissist.
Myka is narcissistic and she therefore she sees others as objects who she uses to further her own desires. She definitely uses her children as props. The fact she was actually saying Huxley "is not returnable" means she was definitely already thinking about not having him for long. For any mother to talk about how her child "is not returnable" is disturbing. She wanted Huxley because she thought he was terminally ill and she would receive a lot of sympathy, attention and validation not to mention donations if she was seen as a mother dealing with a child from China who she had adopted and was dying. Then she most likely thought after a short period after he passed she could adopt another child and go through more attention. When she learned Huxley wasn't terminally ill but autistic she didn't want to deal with his needs. We can see this with the fact she didn't bother to learn Chinese and instead made him sign which was easier for him but also meant only herself and her husband plus a few special needs teachers could understand his attempts to communicate and this made it easier for her to abuse him, including by disregarding his needs, and for others including other adults to not know what she was doing or what he wanted and needed. The duct tape on his hand is another sign of her abusive nature and not caring about his needs and she and her husband gave preferential treatment to their biological children. Once she was pregnant again and shortly after giving birth she decided she didn't want to deal with Huxley any longer so she dumped him like an unwanted animal. She's narcissistic and her husband's an enabler and both should be off social media.
Insane how people accept this
@@Adara007 Nailed it 💯
+Tempest Tossed
What a fucking excellent comment. Absolutely true.
100%
I'm going to fucking say it
giving her child up to be raised by another family who was better equipped to take care of him was probably the only good decision she's ever made as a mother
I agree, your majesty
this.
That doesn’t make sense, giving him up was the reason she’s labeled as a horrible mother
@@pory913 in my opinion she’s a bad mother because the motivation of the adoption was self-serving and she went ahead disregarding all advice that would have made her a better-equipped mother for the child she claimed she wanted. By letting Huxley be adopted by a new family that could accommodate Huxley’s special needs, she made a decision, for the first time, benefited the child in the long run. I think that’s what this commenter^ meant.
It’d obviously have been better if she learnt to truly love and accommodate who Huxley is; but since she had grown to subconsciously resentment him and her rigidity/arrogance couldn’t allow her to change her ways/expectations, the “re-home” outcome was the lesser of the two evils. Huxley would have had a prolonged traumatising childhood if stayed with her any longer.
TLDR: she’s so toxic that her removing herself from the child’s life was the best thing she did for him (after she’d already done some damage by adopting him into her careless “motherhood” to begin with).
@@pory913 but even when she kept him she was a horrible mother, her son went to hug her and she pushed him away, that is messed up.
They’re not horrible for giving him up (because he deserved way better than them), they’re horrible for their motivation for adopting him. (Content, praise/savior status, adversity, autism hashtag, etc.)
Agree. Blessing they "returned" him.
They’re horrible for giving him up as well because it is part of the entire thing. Adoption is trauma. So what they did was cause him the trauma of adoption/changing homes…. twice. All because they couldn’t listen, and were selfish.
agree
@asmrtpop2676 tbh giving him up really was the only correct decision that they made. The damage was already done, so they could either give him up, which would induce some trauma but ultimately open him up to hopefully going to a better home, or they could have kept him, where they would continue to not be able to meet his needs while continuing to shove a camera in his face.
The boy should have never been adopted by that family, but it's for the best that he was taken out of it.
It can totally be BOTH!
Family bloggers shouldn’t exist. The children can’t consent to Being filmed and when they grow up mostly likely they won’t like what they see.
Yeah, your point makes no sense, lol..Like it or not, parents have the right to consent on their behalf until they're legally an adult.
@@ihatecommunism9958 that doesn't mean the child consented, tf?also, why would you name yourself and dedicate so much energy on something you hate?
@@ihatecommunism9958 Bullshit. Maybe they can kinda order me around since they feed me and give me a roof over the head, but going as far as deciding for me is kinda shitty. Legally, they have 100% the right. Morally tho, that shit isn't about to go down their way.
@@moralkombat66 It dooesnt really matter if the child consented. At that age, the parent holds power of attorney and can consent on their behalf.
And Communism killed we over 100 million people. What, are you Stalin lover?
I felt this way about home movies. Put that shit on the internet and you can write me out of your will.
This 2 year old boy had food insecurities and her reaction was “gross, I don’t like that he looks at my husband when he’s eating” instead of being sympathetic.. says a lot about this couple. How disgusting.
Yeah and also it’s strange that she cares so much?? Like I hate being watched while I eat but… like… he’s a child? Even though I’m super sensitive to being looked at any child is totally fine because I understand that they (whether they have autism or not) just tend not to gather social things as much as older people do and may not understand that looking at people while they eat isn’t always comfortable? Doesn’t it just seem weird? That poor kid… as awful as it is that they returned him it’s probably the smartest thing they’ve ever done as parents… im a teenager with no maternal instincts or children or like a great home life and *I* know this stuff… their ignorance is not only embarrassing but absolutely vile and disgusting.
@@lemoncardboard3270 Not to mention, children learn through observation. When they're that young, they engage in looking and mimicking. They're trying to learn the only way they really can. I don't like being watched either, but for someone that young, I'm more than willing to participate in a healthy learning opportunity. Heaven knows proper manners are going out the window at an alarming rate as it is. Teaching a kiddo how to eat and behave at the table is always a good idea.
Its truly sad. You could tell from rhe very beginning that she thought of him differently than she did of her biological children. She treated him like a nuisance rather than a child, and I feel for him and how he'll progress in life with his experience with her and her family. I hope he's doing well and finally being treated like the growing child he is rather than a tumor on her thigh.
She clearly didn't believe or practice what she said online. She was saying whatever it took to get fame. If that meant positive parenting, sure she will say that ad nauseum if it makes her popular. Her only goal was attention. For her. Only for her
It's obvious this lady didn't love her adopted child from the tone of her voice. Scary to me. What seems like common sense about any two year old, she's totally missing. Who raised her other kids?
I genuinely forgot I'm in this video until watching it
Heeho dumby
I would want to forget being in TRO’s basement too.
Imagine being weaker then the editors smh
Hello mr BOX
Is this the taco bell complaint section?hello??
I started tearing up at the 1:02:30 mark when the "dad" said to the boy "Are you my boy?" and he started smiling widely. He is in a better equipped home thankfully, but that moment really drives home the innocence of that child and how much they toyed with it.
I was looking for this comment. That broke my heart more than any of the other footage. 🥺
I was thinking that too and myka had mentioned that In the beginning hux had gravitated more toward James because he held him more in the beginning than she did.. Maybe she was jealous and resented him for that. So sad.
@Kaydee ねこ "daddy" got mad because the baby watched him eat.... he's acting for the cameras
If I came across this couple irl I would initiate a physical confrontation. They literally treated this child differently because he wasn’t their biological child. I’m willing to bet that if it was one of their children that had autism they would have a lot more patience. P.O.S.
Can we all just agree that parents that force their kids to live in front of a camera are bad parents? It never seems to end well for the kids.
Yeah and usually this family’s has so many kids !! It looks like they are having kids to make videos about it !!
YES. RUclips allow it because there is money to be made since companies will jump on the band wagon and vapid idiots will watch as family channels are both relatable and aspirational. I think they are sick. Removing your child's privacy, autonomy and then immortalizing your efforts... the arrogance and disregard for your child wellbeing that these people must have...
It's already damaging to make your own life into content, let alone a child/children who never even asked for that
Kinda like daddyofive. It was all about the money, and getting a big ass house that they only had for like a year. Then they lost the kids.
Yes and their viewers are the one to blame too. Clowns love attention
Duct taping his thumbs, shaving his head when he doesn't want it, getting angry when he looks at you while eating, all of it is so abusive and disgusting. They are abusive parents. Disgusting.
Abusive af
She also fully pushed him when he was going in for a hug. Rejecting a child seeking comfort can be abusive behaviour and using physical force to reject that child? She was not treating him right at all. I'm kind of glad he might be in a place where he gets the attention and considered care he needs rather than whatever way they were treating him. But, unfortunately, it'll also be hard for him to get over this trauma too. Hopefully, he has a good life from this point on and Myka focuses on parenting the four kids she has now in a caring way.
@@laurenettrick9201 and most adopted kids go through separation anxiety that can go to very bad levels, AND the kids struggles with autism, so im guessing its even worse. it makes me furious how theyre trying to victimize themselves in this situation. i also havent finished this video but i vividly remember she once said "me and the kids (excluding *him*) are going to go upstairs in the room to spend some family time" my jaw fell to the floor... they literally only saw him as a cash grab... the whole approach about how they describe him (adoptive son, consistently said "he is my true son, never felt like her wasnt" being repeated OVER AND OVER again tend to have a different effect, signaling that he somehow is different and not her real son but "she doesnt see him as that") makes me feel really uncomfortable?
Thank god that baby is out of there.
I’d also like to add that in a (now deleted) video, her husband talks about how they often put the adopted child to sleep early so that their biological kids could come snuggle in bed with them while watching a movie. Further pushing the narrative that many adopted children experience that they are not the couples “real children” and aren’t worthy of certain activities
She practically demonised a child with autism because she didn’t know how to take care of him... just ew
Bet she thought autism was just some alternate form of Down's or something
@@mupty if she generally thought Autism was another form of Down’s syndrome then my God she shouldn’t have children
@@slime_rat you probably shouldn’t either if you believe fought is how you spell thought
Also I have diarrhea of the mouth
And now I feel terrible after reading you have dyslexia 😫
As an autistic person who grew up feeling difficult and like a burden, Myka's words cut really fucking deep. I pray that this kid won't remember these things and is in a family that won't treat him like a chore, he deserves the world and it's infuriating to see Myka complain about basic parenting. "We didn't sign up for this 😢" then you didn't do your fucking homework! You sign up for EVERYTHING when you bring a child into your care, don't put yourself into that situation unless you're ready for it. This isn't just scummy, it's absolutely fucking tragic and I truly wish this kid the best with a family that knows what they're doing.
I pray he won’t remember but… I’m autistic as well… so I know he will remember 😞
The “we didn’t sign up for this”, but being parents with biological children, you have no idea how your kids are going to come out. They might be healthy, disabled at birth, have a genetic condition you didn’t know both you and you’re partner were a carrier, etc. With adoption, you are literally choosing to sign up to be a parent. I hope Huxley has a chance, he’s been through so much already.
@carolinamurtha3102 christ now that I'm thinking about it, you're absolutely right. they DID sign up for this. knowing how much paperwork the adoption process involves, I'm sure they literally explicitly signed up for this dozens of times.
She is disgusting as a mother!
Myka asked for a child with special needs specifically. A doctor warned them and in one video Myka even mentioned that and she said, that this warning went in one ear and out the other.
She was fully aware, that Huxley had serious health issues.
Her husband was upset because her son was watching people eat... “obsessed with food” yes, he’s a growing child that happens
Not just that but he came from an orphanage in China. He may not have had adequate food or food may not have been guaranteed--all of that will affect him and his outlook on food. It's so frustrating, they took zero time to truly educate themselves on not just raising an autistic child, but potentially a traumatized one as well.
@@MajesticMacaroon exactly, and I feel like she potentially added to that trauma by making him think he was doing something bad for liking food 🥴 unlike a lot of parents, they were able to & made the choice to add an autistic child to their household, yet they got annoyed with him because he was acting like an autistic child?? it’s bonkers
All of this breaks my heart. Especially as an autistic person with a history of trauma and little access to food as a child.
I wish this kid didn't have to go through this
@@connorscorner443 I agree, it’s so frustrating that they went in with zero knowledge on how to take care of him and abandoned him because of their own incompetence. It is at least reassuring to hear that he is doing well with his new family. And I hope you are doing well too, it’s no small feat to overcome past traumas 🤍
The fact that she keeps calling him ‘our son’, even after she gave him away. The second you started treating him like a burden was the second he stopped being your son. Sending him away just confirmed it.
This is how dictators are made
Veeery true.
FFS, I was less annoyed with my cat when he woke me up 2-6 times every night because he kept changing his mind about where he wanted to sleep.
It just shows that Myka never really treated Huxley like a family member, or someone important.
she doesn’t actually see that little boy as her son. she’s just used to telling everyone that to make herself look good. you don’t “return” your son.
Good point, but I have to disagree on one thing - that considering a child a burden makes him not one's child. That would virtually disown like ninety percent of children. It's wrong to present a child as such but all parents are thinking it.
@@Em_Elizabeth That's true to an extent but you have to note that OP said "treating your child like a burden" not thinking anything along the lines of how bothersome a child can be. Groaning about your child when they're being annoying is one thing, treating them like dirt because you're annoyed is another.
"We dont throw fits to get our way." That is literally a major character trait of 2 year olds.
Not just 2 year olds.....lol
Yeah, don’t matter what medical issues they have. 2 yr olds throw fits, you’d think they know that considering that they have biological kids of their own. And more then one at that
Absolutely
Oh my, yes.. My five grandsons are grown now…but I remember….
Totally… she reminds of the yoga moms at my kids school.
Mommy-vloggers value their children in _precisely_ the same way that pimps value their hoes.
The fucking practice should be banned by online content-hosting platforms and acknowledged as a form of felony filial abuse by governments-but, of course, there's way too much money in it for that to ever actually happen.
I wonder if this will be the thing that in the future and generations people will look back and say “what were they thinking?”.
@@aimzzz9382 if humans survive long enough for there to _be_ future generations.
Word!!!
I believe it has been brought up to the courts in France. I believe children of influencers are now entitled to the profits from the content, at least. You can look it up as I’m not sure I’m remembering correctly. It’s not a lot but it’s a start. Now I hope more countries follow suit.
We the people of the world need to keep exposing this behavior, yes, it will happen but we have to keep pushing against people like this!! She just didn’t want a child who wasn’t “PERFECT “ 🤮. No one is PERFECT! And that is ok!! 🎉
It’s so disgusting seeing her treat her son that way. She realizes autism meltdowns are a thing right?
My Angelic mother teaches Autistic kids. My mother is a rare person. She has all of the great traits of the English gene pool and no bad ones. Most of her kids are institutionalized. This lady had no business with an autistic kid. She comes across as narcissistic toward the child.
Toddler meltdowns are a thing. Even if he didn't have a developmental disability he would have meltdowns.
Exactly . He is a toddler and autistic. I myself am autistic, and I’m 12, and I still have meltdowns. I’m verbal, but it still is hard, even when it’s not as severe. So even if he wasn’t severe, or even autistic, he would still have a meltdown
@@5cene5pider You aren't alone, I'm a full adult and I still struggle at times not melting down. Especially when hyper-stimulated and unable to escape excessive stimulus.
@@Incrementium yeah. It sucks sometimes. Hope you do good in life!
I was watching this and my mom overheard the part at the end where Myka is doing the interview where she said the kid they adopted was first diagnosed with a tumor, which she thought she could handle as a cancer nurse, but when he was diagnosed with autism that meant he might never move out. My mom said “so she thought he wasn’t gonna live very long when they first adopted him and wanted sympathy views?” 🛎🛎🛎🛎
That's exactly what I thought too.
Yeah, pretty much. "He's Chinese AND dying? Oh man, the algorithm is gonna LOVE US"
Your Mother is SPOT on.
That’s spot on what I thought !
I never thought about that.. If this is true it's horrible..
Bruh the doctors literally told y’all you weren’t ready for a severely autistic child 🤦🏻♀️
A lot of people will keep changing doctors until they hear what they want to hear
"i know, but i want clout"
"wow you're the worst human i know in a just world you'd be in a cell"
She loved the attention that she was receiving from the idea of adopting. No way would she have considered changing her mind at that point.
Yup and she could have gotten a autistic child naturally too and she can’t give them back so wtf why would she take him and give him the highest hopes of a home and loving family them give him back when shit goes down
Clearly the adoption process does not equate the lack of mentality of the so called adoptive "parents". They are all despicable.
As someone who has Autism, it hurts my heart to see this child be treated this way from parents who were extremely unprepared to take care of him. Filming his meltdowns and duct taping his fingers together is very horrendous and shows she really didn’t care about him like she said she did.
I also have autism and I agree. Even the way she treated him when he was having a meltdown as if he was a spoilt child trying to get attention. They took him on like a pet and then just got rid of him when he become too much. I truly hope this little boy is doing well and he actually has a family who loves him now. He deserves it.
@@rhenaravanderhaar5414 it’s especially harmful when you realize she didn’t even care about him. She says she did, but if she did she wouldn’t have put him through all of that, and listened to the professionals when they said it wasn’t a good idea. I hope the child is in a home where his needs can be met and he’s able to get the help he needs 😓
not to mention 30h a week of *ABA*. that's almost a full work week of just ABA plus normal pre-school., which is often stressful for a child on the spectrum as well.
No wonder the kid was overwhelmed and tried to soothe himself.
I hope where he's know people are more empathetic towards him.
@@mathilda6763 ikr, and I heard ABA can be very traumatizing depending on which specialist you go to. I hope the child is in a much better place now
She fucked up
It's the fact that they chose to have a baby while their severely autistic child was struggling that is telling about how money/fame hungry they were. Responsible parents delay having another child or do not have more children in the interest of their already born children all the time. You can't always have your way, and sometimes you have to take care of what you already have first. But a 'family channel' like theirs doesn't bring in the clicks unless there's a new cute baby every few years...
Yup yup yup 💯💯💯
Absolutely! My husband and I have 2 children, our youngest is autistic. So we decided to not have anymore because both of our girls are going to need us to be more physically and emotionally available. If we have more kids we will have to divide that again...and for what? Cos we wanted more and more children? No sir!
I think if we had more children then our eldest who is neurotypical would of potentially had her needs neglected because our daughter with asd requires a lot and so do babies!
The behaviour of the Stauffers is narcissistic and neglectful! Disgraceful!
I agree in most cases, but for some families they have religious Hang-Ups about that. I don't understand it, but accidents happen and they don't believe in abortion and stuff.
Exactly.
You see, these kind of people are like Tiger King. Kittens make money, but once they get less cute, it's time to make room for more kittens.
It's so sad. That poor kid had to get used to living with these people for a while, only to be given back like an unwanted animal. I really loathe family channels, period.
Wanna start a crusade against them?
@@gremlinfifty2308 count me in. They need the amount of privacy their kids get. (including the loneliness.)
Here here on the disappearance of family channels. Thankfully though the little guy seemed young enough that he'll hopefully still be able to bond and grow feeling loved without this incident affecting him too muvh hopefully. Just glad he's in a better home and environment, away from the camera and people try to make a buck off him.
Sad for the kid but the much more powerful emotion for me is rage.
Yea I mean I’m adopted and like
“Are you creating a RUclips channel around a family or are you creating a family around a RUclips channel” damn
Yes. *Damn*
Im almost done with the video so i mustve missed that but yup that nailed it
I feel like james was actuwlly a good man that truly loved all his kids.. too bad he was paire with myca
I don’t get it
Is Myka just filming her family the way they are or is she forcing her family to act for the camera, including adopting a kid just for the views
Anyone else notice covid sent her over the edge? He had 30 hrs a week of behavioral therapy and private preschool...she never saw him. Then covid hit and she was stuck interacting with him and it was too much work. I agree he's better off without her but the whole situation is disgusting especially how she gushes she'll never give him away..
VERY good point and quite insightful. 💯
the therapy was ABA therapy too... which is so much more harmful for autistic people than helpful.
1. Her referreing to him as "nurse said there's nothing _wrong_ with him" and "he walks and talks like a _normal_ child" was a HUGE red flag.
2. Repeatedly saying "Are you done?" and "Are you over yourself??" at an overstimulated, overwhelmed autistic child is abusive.
3. All she ever cared about was self-aggrandizing and sainting herself, the "what disability is easier than it looks" post gave it away.
4. Her husband, though less insufferable because not on the soapbox, is disgusting and clearly resented the boy from early on.
I'm inclined to believe that James had a lot to do with the decision to adopt H because he was always in charge of the algorithm analysis aspect of the channel. Myka is not smart and she's especially bad at math.
The nurse would refer to him as "normal" because of his condition
What parent doesn't say things like "are you done" "are you over yourself?" "Be quiet before I make you be quiet" to their kid though? That's every exhausted parent. I don't like how she gave up on the boy, that I know is wrong but most of the way she raised him looks...common.
@@Em_Elizabeth yeah I mean she gave up. That's the main issue here
She probably wouldn't have been so 'exhausted' if she didn't make her money by using her children via recording them and posting **their** private lives for strangers to see and judge.
Or, you know, had gotten him **any** of the assistance that people literally begged them to get?
Giving him up would have been one thing if they hadn't literally been exploiting him, and had instead done it because they didn't understand what they were signing on for and thought that it would be easy.
I had a child at my daycare that was adopted from China. When the adoptive parents found out she was deaf and had emotional problems they gave her up. Praise God another couple who had a deaf son and were deaf teachers adopted her. They came to our daycare and taught us sign language so we could talk to her. They were a blessing for her.
they probably werent prepared to handle something that servere.
Or maybe they thought it was like getting a dog i dunno
why do people like taking china's unwanted kids?
@@GloomGaiGar They have rampant child trafficking or child abductions all around the country. It’s so notorious as their organ harvesting.
@@GloomGaiGar adopting from america is a lot harder, much more expensive, and the rules are very stringent. adopting from overseas is significantly easier
Omg I'm crying
I was an adopted kid who initially bounced around from home to home. Even when I finally ended up with a loving, permanent family, that fear of abandonment never went away and still follows me as an adult. Regardless of how loving his new family is, the emotional damage from re-homing cannot be so easily undone.
Edit: Of course staying with an emotionally abusive family would be much worse for Huxley. I just wanted to let everyone know that you can’t fix everything by rehoming a child. Please do not adopt unless you are 100% prepared.
I’d like to give you a virtual hug 🤗 you sound good from the inside out despite everything that happened that you couldn’t control, and that’s true testament to who you really are✨
I understand more than you know on that experience.... sending you love
As a fellow dr icon, know my sympaties are with you. My mom didn't 'abandon' us legally, but she did in other ways.
_ifeltthat_
You are past right abt this. We offsprings need stability. We need our parents. Yes abandonment is a life long horrible sad feeling that sticks with us forever!! Hugs from 1 to another.
As someone who works with SEN children hearing that “are you done?” made my blood boil. People seem to not realise that if you’re not prepared to care for someone with intense special needs and commit to a life of learning you should not commit to parenthood in the first place. Parenthood shouldn’t be a gamble.
Same with him going in the cupboard, that's a totally normal thing for a severely autistic child to do. My son always goes to cupboards if things get too much for him, just leave him be as long as he's safe and happy.
when you say SEN do you mean CEN? forgive me I'm not trying to correct you, genuinely wondering if it stands for something else.
@@meganmarie4541 Special Education Needs.
yep. especially given that people had told her that he had autism and was gonna need extra care and she still just went along with it without assessing whether she’d be able to care for him or not which she clearly couldn’t
I had no training when I started working as an SEN TA and neither did a lot of my coworkers in that department (most schools in the uk don’t have special needs education requirements for SEN TA’s) and yet we all seem to have a better understanding of handling an autistic child than this woman does. It’s literally googleable.
I'm prone to believe that she actually thought, based on the information she wanted to hear and not all that was available (and based on her own statements) that she thought the child had a terminal brain tumor. For someone seeking attention and kudos, what could be a bigger sell? "You take care of him for a bit, he's covered by whatever insurance you have, and he's gone within a few years, all while you document your valiant saving of him and self-sacrifice". Talk about a double-whammy. She gets immense love for "selflessly" adopting a Chinese child with a brain tumor and will get 100x the love when he passes. Maybe it's cynical, but I don't think she "returned" him because he was autistic, but rather because he wasn't terminal.
Holy shit. Maybe that is it?? That’s scary as hell.
that's the impression I got too
of course you will get the worst impression possible when you watch a negative video about someone. That's the point. Do you also think she's ugly and dumb? Cause that's the only thing missing in your cynicism. People are a lot more boring than you think. But hey, everyone loves stories so you do you.
I love your channel 💞
that's a very cynical, but believable think to believe
Also go back on EFAP, you brought up some good psychology facts especially when it comes to video game violence, or how it doesn't cause people to be violent
"are you over yourself" - he is a toddler. A TODDLER.
And an autistic toddler 😭 what did they expect?
Not only that, he's a neurodivergent toddler.
@@avionpiscean33 as an Autistic person myself - their behavior is atrocious.
Edit: the behavior I am speaking of is that of the parents'
@@mbt9700 I imagine you also are not a toddler and have had time to figure out how to cope. Toddlers are already tough gremlins to take care of, but children who have special needs will also act out a ton.
@@MinatheRaichu hello, yes, unsure how this affects whether or not the child should be treated heinously... Which they never should.
*Myka:* "My pet Asian was defective. I have returned it."
Oh my God, that is good and exactly what she said.
I need to speak with the manager, this small Asian Child isn't working properly, I demand a refund.
Truth right there!
👏👏👏👏👏
I totally read your comment in a Karen's voice. 🤣
I wasn’t “ready for” my son’s level 3 autism either. But that’s parenthood. You don’t get to choose your child’s traits. This is how we know she thought of Hux as different than her biological children.
exactly. none of us know what we're doing. since when does autism have a manual? she didn't love that boy as much as her other babies, and that's why she just popped out another like "haha oh yeah & hux is gone." it's disgusting.
My axiety disorder was worse when I was a kid,we couldn't even go to restaurant when I was very very young because the noise would bother me so much, my parents adapted we ate most of our meals at home. They would change the TV channel every time a scary movie or scary movie trailers came on. I got better as I got older but even if I hadn't I know my parents would never abandon or give me up.
@@stephi1311 Them having another baby (presumably by choice but possibly an accident) didn't sit right with me if they were supposedly struggling so much. Why would the mom going through birth and the presence of a newborn be a good idea at that point? Like it's just taking away time and money from the existing child who she claims was costing too much time and money.
With how much she said stuff like "we would never give him up" and "we adopted a little guy from china -- definitely not a failure!" it's like..... Who's she trying to convince?
Funny that when asked about her biggest failure, she immediately thinks of her adopted son, regardless of her trying to label it as a “challenge.” She sickens me.
Yes! So many "the lady doth protest too much" moments in the family's clips.
@@krispy857 It cracks me up that she was asked about a failure, and instead, she talked about a challenging situation that painted her in a saintly light.
@@EmeraldAshesAudio yes! At least that’s what she THINKS it sounds like to us, but as an obvious narcissist would do, is to try to say things & act in ways that she thinks might be the way someone in her position WOULD act. But many narcissist who are as obvious as she, will tend to give themselves away. She might say stuff that she claims is not her motive to do different things, when in fact it was exactly for that purpose she’s saying it wasn’t. Or, like in this instance, when asked about a failure, adoption being her response speaks volumes on what’s really going through her mind at that time. Narcissists especially, do not like to dwell on failure or even the thought that they might be one, so they will not look at anything in their life that way, therefore they never learn from their mistakes. They push blame of any type of failure onto others in their life, & they take absolutely no responsibility for their own actions...ever. She HAS admitted responsibility a couple of times pertaining to this incident, but if you hear or read when she takes that responsibility, right before &/or after she accepts it, there was mention of blame elsewhere. Whether it be on the adoption agency, the medical professionals, the other children or even the child himself. Narcissists also tend to be impulsive, even at times in life when, given the circumstances, it’s expected of them by others to act in a completely opposite way. She has major issues & the only ones suffering are the children. Unfortunately, only time will tell on how much they really endured through all of this.
yup. narcissists do this apparently where they tell you the truth about what they're really doing really early on. There's another channel where a psychologist breaks down her behavior and Myka does this a LOT. She is already having doubts and thinks that a "normal good person" would just push all those doubts aside and do it anyway, but that's actually not what "normal good people" do.
it disgusts me how they adopted him like they were adopting a pet, and then also went to different doctors until they heard the opinion they wanted.
Props to the first doctor for 100% calling that shit
Tbh what parent wants to hear that tho?
@@skylerchan7746 It sucks to hear but that doesn’t mean avoid it until you find a doctor that kisses up to you. If we bumped up the severity, like diagnosing your kid with cancer (which no parent wants to hear), and you went to other doctors for a diagnosis until one said “Yup, happy and healthy.” When the kid _did_ have cancer and you cherry-pick what you wanna hear and the kid dies because of lack of care, the parents are obviously in the wrong. Lower it down to your kid is mistreated because of lack of understanding their condition, still awful.
It’s wild that the husband’s channel is still thriving! Guy’s getting well over a million views on a lot of his videos still 😳
Petscop
A lot of orphaned children have a food hoarding habit. My parents said shortly after they adopted me, i was demonstrating that behavior bypocketing the food like crazy in my cheeks and refusing to let food go-it’s because of food insecurity. As a Chinese adoptee, my blood still runs hot when I hear about Myka. She never loved that child, she loved views.
I also hoarded food after I was adopted; I just did it when I slept walk, though.
Do you know how did they help you out of that habit? I'm real curious about it! It's okay if you don't want to talk about that kind of personal stuff, though!
@@idkwhatsgoingon9723 Honestly I just grew out of it once baby me realized they were regularly feeding me and taking care of me. I still had some food hoarding problems, but them making me feel like I was provided for naturally weaned me off the behavior. They never restricted food from me either, it was just a very natural “okay, you’re safe, you have food.”
I also had a cabinet that was made “mine.” Having that security helped too.
Food hoarding is a coping mechanism to deal with insecurity issues. It’s not unusual and it’s really not uncommon.
I was not adopted, but I do have severe abandonment issues related to traumatic childhood experiences. In some ways, I’m a gatherer, hoarder and collector of basic things of necessity. I’m single and live alone. I don’t really eat regularly, nor do I eat large portions. But when I go grocery shopping, I usually buy way more food than I actually need, because having two or more of anything I may want or need soothes my long-enduring and deep-seated emotional injuries, and gives me a sense of security and stability, even though food insecurity was never a root problem or manifestation of my childhood issues.
Myka is just a selfish, narcissistic and delusional woman, who foolishly thought she could force this special needs child to adapt to her family dynamic. She never bothered to consider that her family dynamic would likely be required to adapt to the child and his needs.
I wasnt adopted but a foster kid. When i was rescued i was literally starving to death. Weighing 28 pds at 6. I would also hoard food hiding it in my room in the form of cans. I would hide my school lunches all over the classroom at school and they would be constantly found rotten. I did this in case my foster parents stopped feeding me for being "bad" etc. Its even bled into my life as a parent also being panicky when we get low on groceries.
I know this video is nearly two years old but I just watched it today. I’ve known about the story since it became news in 2020 but I appreciated this thorough deep dive. I am an adoptive mother. My son was born with multiple heart defects, which my husband and I knew about before we decided to take him in. We knew that he would need open-heart surgery. We knew he would be in the hospital for a few weeks. What we didn’t anticipate was that he would end up having complications, he would nearly die, and he would require a four month hospital stay after which he would have lifelong developmental delays. The adoption agency didn’t anticipate that either, which is why we were asked more than once if we wanted to proceed with the adoption. Not once did we even consider backing out. Six months to the day after he came home from the hospital, my husband took his own life. So now here I was, facing single motherhood with a child who was developmentally delayed and would later be diagnosed with cerebral palsy. Again, I was told that I could back out of the adoption. Again, I never even considered it. From the moment I laid eyes on my child, I fell in love with him. And if he were my biological child I wouldn’t give him up just because things happened that weren’t anticipated. Today, he is 4 years old. He is still significantly delayed and probably always will be. I will have to spend the rest of my life caring for him because he won’t be able to care for himself. Do I regret not backing out of the adoption? Absolutely NOT. He is the light of my life. My pride and joy. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone. So I can’t muster any sympathy for the Stauffers, especially because they at least knew that Huxley had severe medical issues. Hopefully he’s now with a family who can manage his needs and will love him unconditionally the way any parent, adoptive or natural, should love their kid.
You are an amazing person for giving this child parents who love him and will never give up on him and just continue to care for him and love him as any good parent should do. I also want to say I am truly sorry about your husband. I can’t even begin to imagine how hard that was/is and become a single mother, but still doing what you can to care for all his needs. I have a lot of respect for what you do and all you’ve been through. Much love and many hugs from Alabama. ❤
You’re my fucking hero
I hope you and him continue to grow and thrive with endless happiness. you are stronger than many other people could ever imagine. i teared up reading this, and i wish you both the best. as much as i would love to say that i would do the same i know i wouldnt ever be able to both mentally and physically. no matter how hard it gets i hope you are able to overcome it all, being this selfless is truly a blessing.
Omg 😢 this story broke my heart, I’m so sorry you lost your husband, thank you for taking care of your baby and never turning back even though it must be so difficult. I’m sure your baby loves you more than anything in the world ❤
“Family vlogging” is child exploitation rebranded. Change my mind.
I agree
Well that’s just common knowledge
it is... impossible to change that. them's the facts.
Not gonna change your mind
It isn’t if kids are not involved that would make it better
I am an autistic girl and use my channel to advocate for autism understanding and accommodations. It is VERY typical for an autistic child to seem developmentally on track as an infant/young toddler and to have their developmental delays show later on. If someone is warning you that your child is autistic, you need to begin preparing for that. It WILL show at some point or another, even if it is later (mine became clearest during puberty). You really need to do your research. Love is fantastic but not enough to care for an autistic child- it takes work and practice and patience. Stauffer could have done more to prepare.
Thanks for telling us.
WE NEED TO LISTEN TO REASON AND EXPERT VOICES, NOT PRETTY PEOPLE SAYING SWEET NOTHINGS!
@@Ramsey276one absolutely. While a little bit of inspiration goes a long way, MOST important is learning how to take care of real needs
It's even worse when you consider that Myka was a registered nurse. She has made claims of even working as a pediatric oncology nurse. She doesn't even have the microscopic excuse of ignorance.
@@pyxeeful for sure. When you’re taking on the responsibility of having a young child with autism you sign up for all the hardships that brings
Subbed. As someone who hit puberty at 21 and developed autism around then... I can relate
I'm autistic, and while I'm on the more functioning side of the spectrum, if I had a mom that would shame me and film my "meltdowns" for the world to see like they did with their son, I'd probably be nowhere near as okay as I'm now
My goodness I am so so sorry you had to go thru this. My heart goes out to you
@@MelissaRae1975 well I'm fine, as a said above I was lucky enough to have a mom that cared and did none of the things theses people did :) thank you for your nice words tho !!
Same with me
U R lucky. Autism was not even commonly known about when i was born.
Hell yeah. What were they thinking? My son is autistic, and when he was a todler, he cried most of the time too, like this guy. I mean , he screamed crying when he nursed, because he didn't want people holding him. You just had to decide this is my child and go with it. To hear this woman claim to love her kid so much, made me want to slap her.You know, it's my son who taught me how to deal with these kind of people. He'd say, " well, he figured people would be like this anyway, and they were, so there you go." He says stuff like this all the time, and it's awesome.
You skipped over where the report states they inflicted ABA on the kid, a "therapy" that many autistic adults have spoken out about being abusive and traumatic. It could well have been the cause of increasing meltdowns and unsafe behaviours.
Also 30hours of ABA for a 4yo is almost a full time job for the kid. Ridiculous.
What is ABA?
@@little.tricks ABA stands for applied behaviour analysis, a form of "therapy" that uses positive and negative reinforcement to condition someone to act a certain way. You reward someone for desired behaviour, and punish them for undesired behaviour, and through association they are conditioned to act a certain way.
In the context of autism, ABA essentially rewards autistic children for acting neurotypical (such as holding eye contact, something painful for many autistic people) and punishes them for being autistic, such as stimming or talking about their special interests. It's harmful because autistic traits aren't controllable, but are simply part of who autistic people are, yet through ABA these traits are repressed, which has a huge impact on the mental health of autistic people as it makes you have to pretend to be completely different to who you are all the time ("masking").
There's also the fact that the punishments used in ABA can be horrificly barbaric and abusive, such as yelling loudly (when many autistic people find loud noises painful), physical violence such as hitting, depriving the child of food, and in exreme cases using electric shocks (which have resulted in the murders of several autistic children due to their use).
Sorry this is a long explanation, ABA is incredibly harmful yet is still held by many experts as the best way of "treating" autism, when autism isn't something to be cured or repressed.
My son had aba, it was nothing short of abuse. We ended it and my son has learned so much just by giving him understanding and not making him “work” the program. They use “statistics” to justify their abuse. I feel sick every time I see newly diagnosed kids look into aba
Just thought I’d chime in regarding ABA (Applied Behavioral Analysis) is very different than the therapy used 10+ years ago. I really wish they would change the name because it’s an umbrella term where not all therapy is created equal in this field. As an autistic myself, I have 7 autistic children and 2 actually attend ABA. I encourage people to research new therapies and learn about the techniques being used. I am in ABA as well from the same clinic and recommend it to other families. The old ABA was highly abusive and harmful and I’m sure there are centers still like that even now. But not all centers are the same and not all techniques are the same. Our ABA center has truly been a benefit for our family. We have no desire to change our autistic brains. We just want to be able to adapt to environments we find challenging. My children and I also deal with dyslexia and adhd in addition to autism, it makes some things difficult for us. But with our therapy we have been able to learn how to work through things with greater tools that level the playing field. My 12 yo and my 17 yo are in ABA and they made the decision to have this therapy. At any time they can decide it’s not for them as that is the choice I want them to make. As of now, they’ve been doing ABA for 2 and 4 years respectively. We are all different levels and require different approaches. I hope the discussion can be opened regarding ABA and that the differences in therapy can be shown so that people will be educated about it. ♥️
@@mynineandi not to be mean but goddang how many kids do u have
The US needs to have laws in place protecting minors from their parents and social media.
yes! we also wouldn't be subjected to torture like Ryan and the kaji family! My usually polite, sweet toddler started throwing things and asking for junk food after watching Ryan. She literally got addicted to him and would throw tantrum if the ads came up. She wanted the stuff they have! After two whole months of this torture, I completely stopped showing Ryan and said that nobody can find him anymore! She was really upset for two days, and then miraculously changed overnight to being a sweet, funny, polite toddler... she just watches "mouse a cookie" or "Daniel Tiger"
on amazon prime now.
And I love that I don't have to hear the high pitched annoying voice of Ryan's mom anymore... my ears used to hurt and I would get a headache from those horrible videos where they are just making money out of those poor kids
Child RUclipsrs need to be treated like child actors. But chances are no laws will be passed until a child RUclipsr grows up and takes their parents to court over being on RUclips from a young age.
There's no Coogan Act for children online. There needs to be.
100% . One of the worst families is A for Adley. That girl is going to have a hard time in life after seeing the whole world does not revolve around her.
@@sanvistark8837 I recommend you let your kid watch Bluey. It is a very wholesome show with very deep messages.
Wow! I’m so pissed. She had that poor baby in the closet and put him on the internet during his sensitive time!! How disgusting! And when he runs out to her he wants a hug. His arms are out and she is probably looking through the camera and not at him so he just gets her hand. I’m sure his heart felt so heavy and he just needed to feel love. Skin to skin time and just allowing your child to FEEL your heartbeat with your chest together does SO MUXH to calm them and make them feel safe. Then he’s just sitting there on the floor crying while she says “are you done? Are you done?” that is DISGUSTING! That is NOT tough love. That’s REFUSAL OF LOVE. SmFH
Exactly. Completely sickening.
Wait where is that ?
@@AllTheCloudsArePink 33:28 and on.
I just saw the closet thing and yeah i thought he's gonna get a hug... Seems like just a thing to do... That's sad
I did not catch that my first go, thats messed up. The kid really wanted to get a hug from his mother, instead she gave him her hand an then scolded him. If this dumb bimbo put down the Damn Camera!
One thing that strikes me as weird is this: They were perfectly ok and willing to take on the challenges of a kid with a diagnosis of brain cancer. And I don't think the reason was because she is a "nurse dealing with cancer patients" . Brain cancer is seriously dangerous and can kill you quite easily. Maybe she thought because the doctors were so heavily against this adoption due to his condition that the cancer was severe and maybe he didn't have much time to live. In that case, she would have been hailed as a hero, a mother who adopted a child with cancer and offer him a better quality of life than any institution could have provided. But then the diagnosis was changed to autism which, although challenging, it was basically a life sentence for her. I think that's why all this happened. Although I do sound a bit paranoid, I know, I wouldn't put it past her to act in that way.
I honestly believe she wanted to get the clicks of a kid with brain cancer, and then he would die in a couple years and profit
That theory makes me feel nauseous.
Seems harsh, but i can believe in that
This "mother"... oh god, it's like she is hypercompensating for something by giving birth every 2 seconds and telling everyone around how good she is, look at me, i am a hero, remember me as a mother of 4-5 kids plus adopted one! Look how great i am at everything, Jesus Christ hold my beer
Yup. Many have had the same thought. it would have blown viewership through the roof and made national news.
Exactly. She only wanted the clicks and the money that came with them. Maybe she has a hero complex too, thinking that her actions are so somehow justified and that she us indeed a good person.
“It is not easier with each kid… It feels harder with every single child I’ve had.”
So you mean to tell me that the more children you have to raise at once the more responsibility you have and the more stress you’ll be under?! That’s so enlightening! I never would have guessed that the more helpless tiny human beings you’re responsible for the more stressful it is!
Well now you know. And knowing’s half the battle 👍🏻
@@ruthsagers1714 The more you knoooow!
@@ruthsagers1714GI JOE!!!
Seems to be a issue a lot of very strict religious couples have. The men just want lots of kids and don't care about the physical and emotional toll it takes on their wives.
As an adopted child from China, when I found out about this, I was shocked and appalled. Both myself and my sibling are adopted, and yes, of course we've had our own "challenges" growing up, but I know my parents did their research, were responsible, and knew what they were getting into before they decided to adopt, and be that "hero of someone else" with the whole idea of saving someone from a bad situation. They never gave up, and were prepared to take on the good, the bad and the ugly that did come with it. I have some adopted friends who have trust issues from bouncing around from orphanage to foster home to foster home, and I am absolutely disgusted at the fact that this family just got rid of him, that they gave up on him, and that they could further traumatize a CHILD.
The amount of people that treat children like pets or property is insane and further destroys my faith in humans
Your parents adopted you to be loved n cared for, not for views n sponsors.
Totallyahooman
I agree with all that you said (though I wasn't adopted). It's similar to all the stories where Karens and Darrells treat workers like personal servants. Only difference: kids can't get out of the situation (dependants) or get revenge (bossy people). I feel so, so sorry for that kid. I sincerely hope that he gets adopted fast and forgets that his parents existed to have a better life in the future. As for the parents, they'll get what's coming to them. Getting thrown from the Internet is only the beginning, Karma will get them eventually.
Adopted fam. I'm adopted from russia. I was a terrible child I was always screaming and crying. I had really bad tantrums up till I was 11 and got therapy and I think that's when I cooled down. But my parents never gave up even though they now have an epileptic and no good childhood memories of me. Because I was their kid, not biologically. But they did so much to get me they wouldn't just drop me. This family disgust me
@Totallyahooman
Animals aren't property either? How about don't treat living creatures as property.
“Please respect our privacy”, but also they document all their lives on youtube….
Yeah, that makes perfect sense…
Arturo, que haces acá?
That's what I was thinking the whole time. I find this "family youtube" thing to be very disgusting. It shouldn't even be legal. But it's awesome how her stupid adoption plan to bring in me revenue did the exact opposite. It killed her channel.
yeah, thats just a low class cheap shot if u ask me
I sure bet club Nientinendo with his 906 likes, would put down the controller, if he ever got laid, impregnated a girl, and fathered a severely disabled child
a child with level 3 autism. with few exceptions will be institutionalized with professionals in cases where the family can afford it
@@heyzoocifer1392 lol.. what isnt disgusting to you ?
@@randyrogers8201 not sure what you're asking? You think it's OK to parade children in front of a camera for a paycheck? Yeah I find that pretty gross, I think any same person would.
Im fully convinced she would never had adopted the kid if it wasn't for her channel.
They did not legally adopt him in the USA apparently. Thats why they could "rehome" him without CPS being involved
Several people have theorised that the Stauffers really examined the RUclips algorithms, and that may have contributed to choosing a foreign child with a marked disability, as they saw it.
A good prop
@@nancyjay790 ofc yt now a days has become more of a investment than hobby turned profession people take topic study for months then bring big investment to blow.
Yep. The kid was a show pony-no doubt.
As someone with a little brother on the spectrum, I've noticed several parents who have children with autism that they don't understand that their "tantrums" are not that. They have so much more difficulty expressing how they feel. My brother didn't start speaking at all until age 6.
Trying to exist without being able to communicate your feelings about things as a child isn't them throwing a tantrum. It's them being frustrated that they can't tell you what they want or how they feel. They get overstimulated really easily, especially stage 3. It's not easy to parent a child on the spectrum, but they need to understand that it's never going to be easy. But, they're still your kid.
I am considered to have mild autism, but I used to have meltdowns all the time and still do sometimes. It is horrible to experience, but my grandma always knew what to do as she worked on a sped bus. I couldn’t really communicate at all as a kid, sometimes I resorted to scratching myself and screaming because I didn’t know how to say I needed help. I still do the same thing, but quieter now because it’s still so hard to ask for help. I agree with you a lot.
It's not just the mom that abandoned that innocent baby boy. The dad is equally to blame!
@James the title?
He was almost exclusively featured on her channel, not his, so it makes sense that the title focuses on her.
But 100% both their fault without saying
Yet his channel on You Tube has continued to thrive.
exactly. I get why myka gets the most hate in this situation since she is the owner and "host" of the channels dedicated to the family and responded to the uproar by herself on some platforms (instagram I think). but it's not fair to out just myka's name in titles and threads when james had just as much responsibility as a parent off screen or not.
@@yoonglebellz it’s cause ppl usually put more responsibility on women than they do men
As an autistic, this case really got to me. It makes me angry how Myka was talking about H. having tantrums to "get his way" with eating. The kid was from an orphanage! And he probably didn't have the ability yet to see things in a timeframe! So for him, eating is now or never - who knows if and when you'll get your next meal. And how she says "are you over yourself?!"... Infuriating.
yeah, it really irritated me too. I'm studying developmental psychology right now and regardless of autism it'd be reasonable for a child to still operate based on their former environment with likely no secure attachments. So it becomes extra heartbreaking knowing that H. probably understands her and the situation even less than a young child at that age, and that it's NORMAL for children at that age to throw tantrums. They're not doing it to be "disobedient", it's because they're still learning how human interaction works.
Also, tantrums and meltdowns are not the same. And you can have a meltdown "over nothing". Such a meltdown is still a meltdown.
Yeah, she's an objectìveIy horribIe person.
@ebony b Not sure if you're correcting me. If yes, what did I say that was wrong?
@Toeps Even if a child doesn’t have developmental problems I still hate this kind of verbal interaction between adult and child. As a kid adults that talked like “are you over yourself” whenever I lightly disagreed with them or was legitimately upset made me feel like less shit. Like why is your method for de-esculating a situation basically egging the child on with something you have to know could make them be more upset???
Its a pity you missed some stuff: Myka has a history of buying pets and giving them back, SHE WAS A NURSE who was FIRED for ATTACKING A PREGNANT COWORKER, and a lot of other shit :///
EDIT: Oof didn't expect this to get any attention lmao. If you want more info on the patterns and character of Myka (in particular) then check out Without a Crystal Ball, who does serious digging into her past via her social media, and Live Abuse Free, who points out Myka's narcassistic behaviors. I understand that TRO only has so much time to go into things in his videos, but I feel he was way too charitable to Myka :(
EDIT EDIT: while I haven’t looked into it myself, take Without a Crystal Ball’s stuff with a grain of salt, someone has brought to my attention that she may not be a trustworthy source. Always double check your sources kids!
Wtf..
She was also known by friends and family to be like... really fame hungry? And would jump on any trend she could to get attention. There’s a sizable number of people that know her irl that suspected she only adopted H for the attention.
Please tell us more. I want to know more about this fake ass woman who keeps saying she’s a good mom
Wow
Is there concrete evidence for this? I'm not defending her whatsoever! I just have heard this floating from drama channel to drama channel, and sometimes its unreliable.
All I’m saying is that, if he had been their biological son, they would’ve not gotten rid of him. So… was he really their son ?
Honestly, given how trash they were, if this were their biological son i have no doubt they would still have tried to get rid of him as much as they legally could (palming him off on grandparents, babysitters etc). They were simply not willing to raise a disabled child.
@@jazzycat8917 you’re right. They might have put the child in the system as well and “cried” about how they thought they were ready for a 5th child but “simply weren’t” and had to “rehome” the child.
"ReSpECt OuR PrIVaCy"
> Familly blogger exploiting her children for money
My eyes rolled out of my head
Yea the retiteion time must be alot
Those kind of peoples that bitch about their business and privacy yet have noooo respect values or respect for their kids
Her child my foot, her child till the copper rule came out on RUclips making it harder to monetize the chuld..but arill had the work of raising said child,...if someone labels a child with a crazy name for me the red flags go up...
That shits hilarious! Public life comes with public opinion and possible berating. Everything has its downsides.
Rule #1 of caring for children with ASD: NEVER treat a meltdown like a neurotypical temper tantrum. They aren't a brat, they just haven't fully developed the tools they need to advocate for themselves yet. It's just a frustrating for them as it is for you.
Exactly! that’s something I had to learn very fast taking care of my little brother with asd
Even at 13 I could recognise that his thinking was different to his other siblings and neuro typical people and I can’t grasp how full grown ADULTS can’t do the most basic research
I had 2 main thoughts while watching this: 1. She doesnt understand the difference between melt downs and temper tantrums (she seems to use them interchangeably) and 2. She used fucking ABA therapy??? No wonder he was having so many "problems". As another comment said, the best the she ever did was "rehome" him with someone who was capable of taking care of his needs.
"I put my kid into an abusive therapy daily and theyre acting up. I wonder why?"
@@hellomynamesninooo6017 FRRR
exactly, he was trying his damn hardest to communicate with her. if your child is melting down so fucking much that you have to cut him out of most of the blogs like she said, then something is EXTREMELY wrong with the situation and he is being extremely distressed and upset.
he’s not trying to ruin her vlogs or “test her family” he’s trying to say something. he’s trying to use his voice and you’re silencing him and putting him even more emotional destress.
@@catnbearsavedaworld it's the same reason why everyone cries as a baby! We don't know how else to communicate that we need something, especially when we're the ones who don't quite know what we need yet. We just know something is wrong. The sound may be unpleasant, but it's incredibly important to pay attention to. You'll miss something if you don't.
As an adopted child, this story is absolutely horrifying. I can’t believe they actually did that.
I too have been adopted, not only that, I have been “returned”! A foster family I was in before my forever family came into the picture, found some issue with me I have never been able to understand felt it was best to returned me to the orphanage center.
You don’t forget that. Ever. The nightmare of looking out the family car window one night and seeing the place you thought you had escaped from forever. Haunts me to this day. And mine was a private affair. Imagine all that but set to a world wide platform. Oh I hope this dear child is somewhere he is unconditionally loved and treasured and never ever shown this or any of her videos.
I was a foster child myself so I understand the feeling of "this is my home & family now" and also the feeling of "why did they get rid of me? What's wrong with me? Did I do something wrong? Please don't leave me."
You get used to it after you get passed around multiple homes and kicked out before 18 (you'd be surprised how often that happens). I can't imagine how it feels to know you were adopted tho. Being a foster kid, you always have the knowledge in the back of your head that "I could be tossed at anytime" or being threatened to be tossed away again by the foster parents own mouths. You think that being adopted would be a forever thing, but I guess not. 😰💔
@@crazyphan18 he’s in a new home now and the police have confirmed that there are no signs of abuse and he’s completely safe and happy and everything is legal. He’s even calling his new adoptive mother ‘momma’
@@kiarapinto8884 Source?
@@kiarapinto8884 there are no PHYSICAL signs of abuse. Funny thing about abuse and ptsd, to survive you push that shit down and it goes dormant until something unlocks it. I have been in therapy since I was taken away from biological family at the age 8, but I got progressively worse as I got older, it’s only in my late 20’s have I have to terms with what happened to me and who I am because of it.
I’m not mad at her for giving up her son to a family that’s better equipped to take care of him and his needs… I’m mad at her because she knew what she was getting into and blatantly chose to ignore the advice given to her by actual medical professionals, and now this child has to deal with the repercussions of that.
The only time this chick even really cries is when she talks about HER struggle...eyes remain dry as the Sahara when she talks about the baby...we see through you lady
That's how narcissists work, you can never trust them since everything is ONLY about THEM. Everything else is irrelevant or worse.
Oh my God you're right. And when she talks about loving her kid...it kinda feels like she's trying to convince herself.
I don't like when people try to diagnose others over RUclips videos but I think you are correct. She needs therapy not another kid. I'm a schizophrenic and I know I wouldn't be able to care for a kid but that's the problem with narcissists, they think they are gods.
@@Indi_Waffle_Girl that's because she IS trying to convince herself.
@@informitas0117 I agree. And stay strong. I really mean it.
Let's not forget the husband is just as shitty yet his channels seem to have come out of this unscathed - he deserves just as much heat
He buys subscribers and they made a LLC for his channel so H. can't sue them. They are horrible through and through.
Their other kids needs to be rehomed asap
@@angelikalaser7778 what the fuck... that’s disgusting. The fact that H possibly suing them has already crossed their minds just goes to show they know they fucked up.
@@angelikalaser7778 who's H?
@@chomosuke0720 I think they're referring to the adopted son or the extended people now supporting him?
Yea he let this all happen cause he’s too beta to tell her this stunt was clearly not gonna work
Also the idea of them punishing a child for eating when he was food insecure for most of his life...just disgusting.
Eating for comfort is how you grow fat, nobody likes fat people.
Myka has an eating disorder and doesn't give her children enough calories a day. The boy is hungry.
My cousin adopted two boys from Bangladesh and they were very insecure about the prospect of having food. Of just being able and allowed to eat until they're not hungry anymore, it took some time for them to realize that food was not gonna be taken away from them.
Its really hard for children who come from poverty or similar situations.
@Death Omen then he should be used to not eating, you guys are harping on the one thing that she actually got right. Once you develop bad eating habits, it's hard to change. Do you think a kid with super-tism is going to have that sort of self-control?
@@KameSennin4209 You're right. I know a couple who adopted 2 kids from Eastern Europe, I think a Ukrainian orphanage or a similar place. They would overeat bc they were used to being hungry, & the doctors told the parents to only let them eat a certain amount of food at a time & on a schedule until they adjusted. They were ages 3 & 6 when they came to the US. Now they're teens & perfectly fine
I hate parents that "can't" deal with a child with disabilities. If you can't deal with it, don't have or adopt children
You guys notice anytime she's showing the kid any affection she looks into the camera to make sure it's catching it like "see look im such a good mom". She gives off an evil vibe like she was cruel to him off camera.
You can see contempt in her face in a couple vids. one where shes giving the two little ones a toy and she approches him like hes going to bite her.
Pretty much yeah she cares about looking like a good mum on camera then tosses the kid aside like a broken toy she's an awful person.
What catches me off guard.
Is she doesn't blur her kids face's, both Huxley and her bio kids, given the complete and simple fact kids can't give concent, it doesn't matter if the kids wanted to be recorded like how they where in the videos, she and her husband is they're parents, they should know this.
Idk how Huxley is able to be blurred when her bio kids weren't.
But its clear to say, she attempted to love Huxley, but extremely failed in doing so, sense I have a baby brother similar to Huxley's diagnosis (He's my bio brother), and last time I checked you don't tape their hands to a wall cuz they kept sucking on they're thumb, let alone with any kid, especially when you had completely no problem with the other kid does the same at the same age as the other one.
its a clear sense of faveritizm to me.
There's a REALLY illuminating interview of her where she actually admits that she adopted him thinking he had a brain tumor and wouldn't live long; this is when she wasn't considering "rehoming" him yet. I'm paraphrasing but she said something along the lines of "now I might have this autistic child in my life for the rest of my life". Nauseating and shows how calculated she is. She has nursing training and wanted to have a kid who would die so she'd be the white saviour who "gave him a good few years out of the kindness of her heart and is devasted by the loss and needs sympathy" type situation🤢🤮
She also said she planned on adopting an African kid next, like some kind of collector ok I have to stop or I'm gonna barf omg 🤮
@@faithbarcelo4795 I don't like wishing bad on people but she's well deserving of a mountain of bad karma. A shame she's raising kids.
-Thanks her audience for respecting her son’s privacy
-Films several of his private meltdowns publicly
Ah yes, truly we are respecting his privacy. And they are respecting his. Very very good, Mr bright
Mr bright... i would be mad... but your right... ill make an exeption...
Another one to the list you can’t do
And they looked more like a tired, overwhelmed child in distress than a meltdown tbh.
When the foundation calls you immoral you know you done goofed.
She was okay with it being a brain tumor or cancer because that came with increased odds that he might die. That would have been great for views AND would have made sure he wasn't around too long. Did you hear her? "That might mean he lives with me forever." said with disgust. She never planned to keep him.
Yikes you are hella honest
@@tankbeast8480
I mean, that IS how folks like her think, ain’t nothing to be sugarcoated there
They meant like he would never be able to care for himself. Even into adulthood
This
That interview was illuminating, nauseating and shows how calculated she is. She has nursing training and wanted to have a kid who would die so she'd be the white saviour who "gave him a good few years out of the kindness of her heart and is devasted by the loss and needs sympathy" type situation🤢🤮
She also said she planned on adopting an African kid next, like some kind of collector ok I have to stop or I'm gonna barf omg 🤮
The way myka punished the child for having melt downs makes me so sick and angry to this day. He was punished for trying to communicate, for struggling, for being uncomfortable, for being hungry. She continues to say "it's the principal of the thing we don't throw a fit to get our way" BUT HE PHYSICALLY CANNOT COMMUNICATE IN ANY OTHER WAY. Ugh this is old and my comment does nothing I just get angry listening to get talk to that child.
Right?? Complaining about the kid "wanting to get his way" with the bio kids on the lap, while H was in the rug, and the "parents" were being mean to him. Poor baby 🥺
She is disgusting! Shame on her for treating this child like this !
It's very disturbing. There needs to be laws protecting children from Internet moms trying to make a buck
If she has birthed this boy should probably wouldn’t have “rehomed” him.
Special needs parents AREN’T experts. We have to go through all the struggles as we learn to raise a special needs child. She did a fantastic job alienating the special needs community. All she did was manage to harm that child even more. That child is going to have further attachment issues due to her actions.
nah i think she would have gotten rid of him even if he was her bio kid. she’s ableist as hell. she clearly see disabled people as inspiration porn and a way to get clickes.
Kate Gosslin sent her own son to an insitution because he wouldnt yeild to her narcisism..Myka reads simmilar to Kate, she probbaly WOULD get ride or institutionalize a bio child with the same condition.
I know a taxi driver who is taking care of an autistic child that their family picked up abandoned by a riverside. That child's mother specifically left that kid their to roll off and drown. It's a miracle the taxi driver's mother happened upon her and picked her up. Biological parents can be just as worse.
They couldn't provide adequate care so they relinquished custody of him for someone who could. There are so many stories that end in real tragedy where people comment "they should have given her/him to someone who would love him!!"
I think he will be okay. If he is getting love and attention in his new home, which I’m sure he is. I hope he forgets all about these sick people. I hope he gets all the love and support every child deserves.
Already deciding that you are going to adopt a specific ethnicity before you even start the process rubs me the wrong way. Adoption isn't a build a bear for kids...
They should just settle on playing sims if they wanna play the perfect family :p
I think it was more getting a child away from that shithole rather than just wanting a Chinese kid. Or at least it was *supposed* to look that way.
I have no way to back this up, but if I remember right one of the drama channels ( not sure which dad challenge maybe) dug up a blog post or something like that where they were looking through the options. The basic understanding seemed to be that China was the only country that would approve them. Just on the face of things they already had a large family, the finances are incredibly unstable etc.
@@dricmeistr3977 that was not it. It’s called White saviour complex.
@@pyxeeful I hope thats the case, but they did say they decided Chinese and followed up by saying they haven't even started the process yet
*She looks like the kind of person to use a different colour pen for every sentence in her notebook*
Lol. Great comment.
i hate those people, they usually end up poking at the wrong buttons
more like a different color for every letter
@@stickykeys1594 Thank you for generalizing.
that is perfect
i’m adopted as well and when my mom adopted me, she met a woman who also eventually sent back the child she adopted (because she managed to fall pregnant and she found herself loving her biological child more.) being adopted comes with a lot of emotional turmoil that, unless you’re adopted too, not a single person understands. the way these sort of people just give back a child and possess such a severe lack of understanding of the emotional impact they’ve just inflicted on a tiny person by doing this, on top of the existing emotional and developmental trauma, horrifies me to my core.
What angers me most is that she was adamantly told about the potential difficulty she may have raising him, but totally ignored it and now he is paying the price.
I cannot wait for the kids of family channels grow up and create an expose on their horrible parents
It will known as RUclipsr consent abuse , these children would be allowed to litigate RUclips and their parents for using their image without any consent . I have four kids , 22,20 ,18 & 6 , all are asked before any photo or detail of their lives are shared on social media .
Asking a child a question if ‘they are done ?’......when the child is upset and confused and already emotionally scarred plus he has autism ..... Autistic children don’t know how to communicate , hence “ fit” or “ meltdown” , you make sure that you are constantly supervising and praising their good behavior .....DON’T have kids , adopted or naturally breed unless you are selfless and empathetic, and extremely patient and have money to literally burn ! I got off Facebook from all the over sharenting......
Lol, it's like investing in a stock- watch a family RUclipsr debatably, non-debatably abuse their kid now, and in 10-ish years, it pays off.
@@theoracletempleoflovelight2222 I love everything you said, but can you explain one thing: are you saying fits/meltdowns are exclusive to children with autism? I don’t think you are, but I wanted to be certain I understood you.
@@theoracletempleoflovelight2222 I have now completed the video. I get your comment now!
What gets me is how she expected nobody to notice or care when their adopted son just....disappeared from the vlogs and Myka's profile changed from "mother of 5" to "mother of 4". She honestly expected her viewers to forget about that poor boy's existence just as easily as she and her shitty husband did.
%100
While we dont know what happened to the kid, TRO has brought us the information that will allow the viewer to form their opinion and spread it to other Myka viewers. Even if the kid doesnt see it, the people will put her down(verbally, of course). After that, we can only watch and wait
100% agree. I am absolutely disgusted by this woman. You couldn't pay me enough to ever watch her channel.
@@nicoleweiler1105 I think it's been deleted, actually. Last I remember, I couldn't find it.
Husband wasnt the bad guy here
I wonder if her smaller children will be afraid now that their mom will give them away if they're bad
BLAH, good point!
They ALL need therapy and God. Prayers 🙏🙏🙏
@@kailinngillen1182
Amen for REAL🙏🙏💯💯
I think that the way Myka always talked about the child as if he was a project and not a person is truly disturbing.
She is definitely disturbing. These type of women sicken me.
"My son is not returnable" She is trying hard to convince herself on that one ..
As if he's a cooked ham she's bought from the store!! 🤬
I feel like all her videos about this adoption were all blatant attempts to convince herself she’s a good, noble, person. Makes me angry. The little boy isn’t a toy you can just throw away once you’re done with it 🤬
Its so gross thst these parents gave this child a different bedtime so their biological children could spend quality time with the parents. Thats so fucked up
When she explained/defended it too, I was like “wow, does she realize her explanation is not...better??”
Omfg is that true? If so they are despicable people. I actually think exposing children to the public like this is gross.
@@trcykaufman yeah, I dont have the clip. They have deleted a lot of content regarding the child but it was in one of the videos exposing them. And I agree its disgusting how they use their children like this
Omg i totally missed that detail , you have got to be kidding me ,wow!!!!
To be honest I'm glad he's not with them anymore , no doubt there are people more deserving of this baby boy . Someone that is not narcissistic
The fact that she can't recognize frustration over anger tells me she doesn't deserve the joy of raising this child.
Or any child tbh
As an adoptee and a person with a disability I can agree with this creator my mom knew what she was getting into and gave me all the treatment and more importantly love I needed to grow into the man I am today to quote my mom on why she adopted me "I just say two great kids and wanted them. In short my mom adopted me and my sister out of love not out of any gain for herself and I will always be grateful for that.
The fucked up part is that the age at which they “rented” him guarantees he will suffer social and developmental consequences.
But it also guaranteed the most views and thus money, so it was worth it to them. Truly stomach-turning disgusting pieces of schmidt man
RENTED....BEST DESCRIPTION EVER!!!....
Exactly. A boy his age is still learning how to understand the world and develop relationships. The fact that they did this to him, a child with ASD, specifically makes it ten times worse. Individuals with ASD often find comfort and security in repetition, familiarity, and a set structure. Suddenly taking all that away can be really distressing and confusing. But doing that with an entirely new family on top of that? They might as well have just pulled a rug out from under him! It'd be more like a miracle if he DIDN'T have attachment issues after that.
It's true
But relinquishment/adoption already guarantees developmental problems. Separation from the biological mother causes a small child to go into a chronic state like 'fight or flight'- interrupting development. It's why many of us struggle with mental health and learning disabilities. In fact, we commit suicide at a rate 4 times greater than non-adoptees.
But to be relinquished *again*... *shakes head sadly. I wish this boy every good thing.
Wondering how they explained this to their biological children.
When he tried to hug her and she pushed him away, it hurt my heart. I just want to hug him so tight. So sad.
Same. Poor baby. I hope he's getting all the love he deserves right now.
Because he was on her blog and seen....im sure he is doing fine. Better than so many others.
Time stamp please?
@@sselassie3126 34:24
Me too!💔
The cartoon pic of the mom basketball shooting the baby away......dang
y e e t
*y e e t t h e c h i l d*
Yeah let’s continue to demonize and make a cartoonish joke out of a disabled kids entire life amirite guys?? U ppl are disgusting
@@chowderwhillis9448 people like you are the reason why mature content has trigger warnings in them
OUT OF THE WOMB AND INTO THE TOMB