These men walk out of their kids lives, take issue with child support, beg women to “delete” fetuses, the mom regardless of marital status are the default parent. I just don’t get why they are pro kids when their actions say something else.
Your children are your descendants, not your legacy. They are their own person who will make and be responsible for their own choices and create their own legacies.
Yep, the man is confusing legacy with lineage. His actual question should have been "what about your family's lineage?' Legacy is something very different and I am confused why men like this don't know the difference. Legacy is the impact of what they did in their lives, it also is a synonym for inheritance in some contexts.
Your whole entire lineage can be ended by a selfish homicidal abuser, a war, a horrible act of violence. Why do these types of dudes try to sell women rose colored disney glasses? Wtf.
@@gensai93ain’t this the truth. They don’t even know the difference between legacy and lineage. 🥴 I always wonder do they have any shame? Just saying anything. 🤦🏽♀️
While they (the man) carry on with their lives, make you mesirable, give you a hard time by not providing for the child, blame you for how the child turns out. When you succeed they find ways to bring you down, you find a man who loves you and the kid and they poison the child and make sure the child misbehaves to drive a wedge between you. It's a mess.
Men need to stop confusing having kids for legacy. Legacy is the impact, positive or negative, you have upon the world. But I guess these type of men see having kids as a legacy because they have nothing else.
Only it's not there legacy because they didn't actually give birth to it there a seed planter not a life giver that's what there confused about and I believe the X chromosome was around longer then the Y chromosome too because there's more of them and there usually stronger cells X chromosomes swim faster too that's why you see men all bummed when she didn't create a son. This whole thing with Adams rib is a lie too females have been around longer they may not have been humans yet but there cells exsisted longer so what actually happened was they planted themselves that's why an X cell can fertilize a female egg but a Y cell needs the female eggs help to be born. Just this formula itself proves God had a mother too not just Jesus he may of thought he was God but he still had a creator and it was a female.
These are the same BM blaming single Black moms for all world issues, for being single moms and telling them: "shoulda chose better". When these same women heed the writing on the wall and DO "choose better or different", they all act confused. Refer to most recent reactions towards Keke Palmer.This is not just gaslighting, it is sadism🥴🥴🥴
They get angry when black women want better for themselves because then they won’t be able to blame us anymore for the problems in the world and overpopulation
All they heard was that they won't have access to her or her womb unless they have something to offer. Tell me, what do black men have to offer anyone?
Most men who want kids do not want to be fathers. They just want the title of dad without putting in the effort to parent the kids. That is truly selfish
People need to stop having kids on a whim or by accident, they need to actually plan and take responsibility for their actions. Birth control is not that hard to get, especially condoms.
@@gensai93 I agree. In this day and age there's absolutely no excuse for having an "accidental pregnancy". People have to stop being so reckless with their seeds and their wombs.
to be honest with you, as a male myself, who surely does not have kids, and never will, most of these guys who preach legacy really don't have any idea what they're talking about...reality is, majority of them won't be there for the child, and given how horrible the economy and stock market is, even a lil child support would probably thrown them over the edge.😂...i think most of them have an issue with ego, and just want to create body's as if they're spreading themselves across the globe, i guess a masculinity + ego issue with men not feeling manly enough unless they reproduce..and most will brag about the number of kids they have but you're hear crickets if you really question how involved they are in the child's lives...basically, their assumption is irrelevant unless they can statistically prove otherwise...
They told women to choose better and now that women are, they're mad. That's why women should completely ignore those males. They are mad because they won't have access to women.
Exactly. At this point, I’m rolling my eyes 👀 at women who listen to male foolery, than the males talking this smack. If nobody listens, they would STFU!
Men dislike child free women because your not tied to anyone, your time and resources are free for you, and they hate your freedom ,and would rather see you struggle with a kid. Also they bash single mother's while bashing you for opting out
Yes. I’m childfree and single and it’s like THE THING that irks some of these so called “Alpha males.” (They’re not the real alphas but you know, the self proclaimed ones.) Especially when I’m working on a team with them or apart of some group with them 😅 I’m also quiet so they can’t even say I’m the loud obnoxious type that can’t keep a man. They always try to “humble”me and it doesnt even have to be in response to something I’ve said or done. I’m just there and they start in with all kinds of undermining comments, “guesses” about me, etc etc. Those types are so exhausting to be around.
@@mrenae6798That is crazy. I peeped this that they just want BW miserable or dead when they insulted Serena and Gabby Sidibe on social media bec these dudes don’t find the two of them attractive. But when both found nonblk men who valued them and commit to them, I was like ok. Y’all just wanted Gabby Sidibe to throw herself over a cliff, and get salty bec somebody else like her and values her. They want BW at best, miserable and mired in struggle, at worst to just be dead 💀. They triggered by BW who mind their business a live their lives.
@@gensai93exactly. That’s that double talk they always do. You can’t have it both ways especially when those same men are also advocates for not marrying at all. The “it’s just a piece of paper with no benefits” crew.
With the disdain BM have openly expressed towards BW, they've got a lot of nerve calling a single, CF woman selfish and accusing her of not being interested in continuing her "legacy". Perhaps we should point out the BM's legacy to give him a better understanding of the informed decision many BW have made: THE BLACK MAN'S LEGACY: Black communities overrun with the children of absentee fathers; single mothers sinking deeper into poverty no matter how hard they work; DV & SA by BM on the vulnerable populations within our communities (children, women, elderly, disabled, pets, etc.); toe tagging/deleting a BW every 4.5 hours, which leads to orphaned children, many of whom end up in the foster care system; unsafe neighborhoods where misguided young BM hold entire communities hostage with random acts of violence, drug/gang activity; the risk of harassment or attack if one should happen to cross their path, even when innocently minding their own business; and the abject ignorance generations of BM have marinated in, which has been of no good to anyone, especially themselves. I could go on, but why? BM, take responsibility for your own freaking legacies before you judge BW for no longer participating with you in your race to the bottom. Legacy my A**!
This...all of THIS!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 My Black brother has 6 kids by 3 different women. And he wants more. Because he wants to able to drag more women and children into poverty. He knows he can't afford children but...he doesn't care. It's deeply sick and the reason I cut off ANY contact with him. I've disowned him.
Yes! This comment needs to be pinned. The first thing I said when I saw this, was why are BM having this conversation when they don't take care of the multiple seeds they spread everywhere?
@catmouse2882 good, do these women a solid by giving them his social security number so they can get child support from him. Or go to jail for not paying it. He needs to be held accountable for his choice in ignorance.
What he meant to say was he thinks "Women choosing not to have kids is selfish to *men* " and that hurts men's feelings. It's giving envious, panicked, incubus energy.
It is, they act like a child who doesn't even exist is getting mad, when it's the men who are getting their own feelings hurt. It's not women's responsibility to make men feel important, actually do something with your lives and stop thinking that ejaculation makes you special.
This is exactly what he meant. He couldn’t believe a woman wouldn’t want to be tied down with a child by a man that had no intention of staying in that child(ren) life. Now that’s selfish, choosing not to participate at all isn’t.
They will NEVER address that on their pitiful podcasts and if they do it will be to tear black women down about picking pookie and ray rays and tell women to choose better. Now women are completely opting out, and they are big mad! 😂
I had a professor at university who had no kids. She dedicated all her energy and passion to her students and she definitely left an important imprint on all of us. She wrote books and helped us understand the benefits of prosocial behaviour from a scientific point of view. That woman definitely created a great legacy.
Men use double speak i.e. "legacy" instead of the accurate word "family" in order to literally and figuratively distance themselves from the responsibilities of creating a family. The implication is that any kids they accidentally create can be their legacy, nevermind with all the hard stuff like monogomy and familial responsibilities. 😂
Men just desperately want the whole world and it’s women to bend over backwards for them in any and every aspect. That’s why man created this patriarchal society so they can benefit while women get nothing. This boils down to most men’s beliefs that women shouldn’t be held to the highest pedestal simply for existing. Which women contributes so much more than what men give credit for but hey, go off🤷🏾♀️. When in reality: the woman has access to both the physical and spiritual realms especially when it comes to childbirth. She keeps the world going and men know that. They get resentful for many things that women have that they don’t. Not all of course but the ones who don’t posses one dominant/healthy masculine bone in their bodies. As women: we decide to keep this society going or end human extinction. If men fear this, doesn’t this mean they should look within and do what it takes to make sure that still happens? Or will they side with their egos and pride that couldn’t potentially end humanity? Simply because they consistently brainwash themselves they aren’t the problems 🙂↕️🫠
BM believe that once he has a kid with a woman, she becomes a part of his "stable". The more baby-mamas the better. He can always use the kids to remain connected to the mother.
Exactly 💯 My brother has 6 kids by 3 different women. He looking to get a 4th women to impregnate to add to his "stable" Blk males have a plantation buck spirit....one of the reasons why I married a non-Black man. Me and my white, Hispanic husband been together for almost. 18 yrs❤ My brother has created 3 broken homes during that time frame.
He uses the kids as a chain to circle back to the woman to use the kid as an excuse to force the woman to deal with him forever, whenever he wants to be bothered with her. They are the most selfish people on the planet
@@catmouse2882I hope you gave those 3 woman his social security number so they can put him on child support. He needs to be held accountable for his actions.
What a disgusting, parasitic way to live. Yet, they really think they're doing something. It's hard not to see them as a bunch of psycho and sociopaths.
Damn straight. Not only that but when these same women get pregnant the man eliminates the mother and child while she's pregnant. Wonder what he would say to that.
Statistically black men are the most active fathers. For the ones who aren’t those are the ones that women keeping choosing to take them to pound town.
Love the flight attendant who spoke on what a real legacy is. It NEVER EVER crossed my mind that my children were a legacy. Most people don't even know the names of their great grandparents and where they came from. Poor people, average working class people leave nothing to brag 1, 2 or 3 generations from now. Lets live in reality and not pretense.
That part 👏🏾 And I'll add that being apart of the Black community...Black children are abused at the HIGHEST rates ....by their own parents. So I find it kinda weird that Black males pressure Black women to procreate when they are the ones who will abuse those children.
This. Moat if their kids will be average. It sounds so pretentious to say legacy. How many of us remember the average people we meet? Its a poor shaming tactic.
I am not a woman and I am childfree. One of the reasons I chose to be childfree is because I do not want the responsibility. Much like a lot of deadbeat dads, I do not want the responsibility of parenthood. The difference between me and deadbeats is the fact that I chose not to have children ; I chose to keep my genitalia in my pants; I chose to think with my head instead of my hormones and my ego.
The vast majority of us will not make it into history books or be remembered beyond the next couple generations. What have you done that deserves a legacy, sir? Out here acting like royalty with a royal bloodline. Also with like 70% of black kids being fatherless, we see how much they care about their so called 'legacy.' They see kids as a trophy they don't have to put any time or energy into.
I was told twice by two different women, that I was selfish for not having kids. I asked them, who exactly am I being selfish to, the kid that hasn’t been born yet? They couldn’t answer. Men’s opinions mean nothing to me. Letting men have any opinion about me, cross my ears, is a non starter. Choice means you can choose either way and not be put down for either choice.
"Remember black women can die from giving birth". I tell them that everytime. I have one child. The people try to convince me to have more. I say "Are are you gonna help me"? Crickets. 😂
@@athenasol1723 I tell them to write a contract stating that they will provide for my kids that they want me to have. And I would wdng the best for them, they will need private s hook education, Tutors for bilingual education etc
Some women are internalized by it...these men know how to play with words... this is why I never take men seriously...I take everything they say with a spoon of salt...they will gaslight you..I don't argue with them no more .f them... I'm doing me
She got them both together. 😂 They’re reponse of, “that’s selfish” is the equivalent to a man insulting a woman for rejecting him. They resort to the most basic response when they don’t have an actual argument or rebuttal to stand on.
haven't they spent the last 2,000 years telling women that the kids are their (men) seeds and legacy. seed of your father etc and women are basically just the incubator for their "seed". Now that women are opting out, all of a sudden, the kids are our "legacies" now. LMAO!
Putting responsibility of "legacy" on a child is a form of child labour. I know for a fact my children would need therapy by year 5. I'm a mental health consumer and on my bad days the poor baby would get the basics: food, clothing and shelter and we know thats not enough. I'm not interested in creating more 9-5 laborors, more therapy clients, more people existing in these polarized not safe for people of color streets, lets not even discuss if my child ends up LGBTQ identified. Also, Im poor as a dog mom, I dont understand how people make ends meet with dependents. No kids for me.
But a legacy is what the child leaving behind as a man or a woman/ adult. Children aren’t legacy’s. Children build their own legacy’s or just become A regular person… or crackhead or school shooter. A lot of people don’t know the difference between lineage and legacy.
The lady who said that having a child to carry on your legacy is idiocy nailed it! These guy's can't talk about selfish bcuz nothing is more selfish than having a child for a legacy. And these guy's double standards are just too much. 😆 If she has children she's a baby momma and doesn't deserve a good man, and if she doesn't have children she's selfish and not carrying on a legacy. Oh, brother. 🙄
We truly live in a sick and disgusting world. As a man, I get called selfish for choosing to be single/unmarried and childfree. In reality, getting married is selfish because you want company, sex and money. Having children is a lot more selfish because you want a mini-me, a caregiver and a legacy. You just wanted a spouse and children for your personal gain. The thing is that the phrase "I want..." indicates that you are selfish.
Really YOU? I think it is great you want to be single as a man. More men need to think like you and STOP pretending you have what it takes to cultivate a successful healthy happy relationship and being a father. Not all men deserve a family and if more men admit that they will be better off. Thanks for your honesty and continue to work on yourself. 😌
Don't let them pressure you... your life your rules.. you didn't kill nobody.... they be the most miserable trying to give you advice...yea no thanks...stay doing you✨
I never understood somebody calling another person selfish because they didn't want to have children either!! That never sat right with me and never made sense. People who bring kids into the world any old kind of way are selfish!!
Oprah said in an interview, that she wasn’t “mothered” or “parented” properly, so she didn’t want to have kids. Oprah has a legacy though, but not decendants. 🎉
There are successful entertainers and public figures who died without having kids and their legacies are just fine. Luther Vandross, Tupac, Billie Holiday, Chadwick Boseman, etc. And there was entertainers like Josephine Baker who never birth any children of her own but adopted. Miss me with that legacy mess and what women are born to do. Just because a woman have eggs doesn't mean she is obligated to push out a child if she doesn't want one. I respect women who say they don't want to have kids. If you know in your heart that you don't want to have kids, why have them? F**k what society tells you to do. What do you want to do? It's your life at the end of the day. It is not selfish to not to have kids. A real legacy is making an impact and doing something that isn't all about YOU. Having a child is about you.
Why are women treated this way when women don’t want kids or get married, but men are never looked down upon for their choice to not marry or not have kids. It’s a double standard. So is the body count thing. women are allowed to want and enjoy sex without being belittled, degraded or loosing value for it. Why do men get the hype for their body count but women get the opposite? It’s all a crock of shit if you ask me. I’m glad women are speaking up, talking together and no longer centering men, unless they choose to. One cookie cutter traditional lifestyle isn’t right for 100% everyone. I’m so glad things are changing for women. women’s rights have come a long way. 💪 stay strong ladies! And let’s take back women’s sports! We didn’t come all this way to let men into women’s leagues.
I don't understand the body count argument from men. They say that it's normal for men to be promiscuous, but wrong for women to be promiscuous. Who do they expect to have sex with if not women? Each other? Animals? None of them ever go that far because their argument can't hold water. The point is males love promiscuous women, period.
Women are looked down on no matter what because they see us as inferior, that's it. Nothing will change as long as they continue to see women as things not people.
When I look from the outside in- all I see is bigger expectations placed on women cause women seem to be the better human being. It is almost like they expect the best from women cause women give the best. So these men low key admitting that they are shitty human beings without actually saying it, but want to pretend that they are not. I’m so glad women are waking up. We can continue be better for OURSELVES, decenter men is the best thing ALL women can do for themselves😌
@@BayouBarbie504 patriarchy is not the problem. The sexes are different and patriarchy evolved for survival of society. It is not inherently bad but there are people who are badly behaved. Men are men & women are women we are different and so want different things -there will be double standards because of it. If a person doesn't want kids then that's their choice. Those who want w ill find each other. What has changed is society. Traditional roles have been blurred, family values at all time low, economic uncertainty, human n interaction. All this has consequences and affects our beliefs and perception. It's in upheaval now and the distance between the sexes grow as they understand less about each other whilst trying to balance the chaos of the world.
If your legacy is only about having children, you have a pretty awful legacy. Imagine having no desire to have kids except to make yourself look good, and forcing them to continue the cycle because "legacy". That's the legacy of a shitty parent and generational trauma.
These guys are such bullies but she handled herself like a QUEEN. And as an outsider looking in, I see how BM treat BW- SOOO proud of BW coming out and schooling these ignorant men- Ladies are opting out all over and it's lovely to see!!
You leave a legacy FOR your child to benefit from....children are not the legacy, only someone with no wealth to leave to their children, someone poor thinks the child is the legacy. People who are childless can leave a legacy behind if they accomplish great things in their lifetime.
If they really want a legacy, they can adopt a child themselves. Giving birth today is a terrible idea, considering ALL the problems that come with it. There really is no difference between adoption and birthing in terms of the child being just as valuable. ALL these men want is sex and irresponsibility.
Just here producing additional cogs for the machine of capitalism. If I didn't know my children already, and had the knowledge I have now? I wouldn't have had children. I love my children, but what do they have to look forward to? My daughter jas told me she doesn't want children and honestly, I can't argue with her. What for? Seriously, if you can't actually afford to provide for your child in the way you want to? Do not have them. There is a regret that comes from your child being limited by money and opportunity that cannot be erased.
People remember Cleopatra as the queen of Egypt, they don't remember her son. His name was Caesarion, and he is Caesars son.....yall didn't even think about that when you thought about her legacy.
These men are so tedious. Your “legacy” is the impact *you* leave on this earth. It’s how you are remembered and regarded. All I see is control slowly slipping away and they’re losing their sht bc they won’t be able to come back and wreak havoc on the world generations later 😂😂
I agree with her theres definitely people out there that talk about passing down a legacy to their kids but don’t have anything to pass down to them but trauma. I don’t think they really care about legacy at all.
Men like him are pro kid, because they have the choice to walk away once the child is conceieved/ born. They knock the woman up and then walk away, leaving her to be a single parent. Surprisingly, they go all shocked Pikachu face when later on their legacy is nothing but abandonment and struggle and poverty.
Most BM don’t usually deeply consider the future like that. Of course they would only care about legacy in terms of what they demand someone else to do. Legacy is accomplishments, and leaving your family in better circumstances than before. How many BM even have a life insurance policy and have taken the time to write an official will? Sperm meeting an egg is not an accomplishment.
Right my MIA sperm donor disappeared for uhhh my whole life then randomly decided he wanted to have a relationship at his nearly 70 years of age 😂 I’m good
Bruh. I had to rewatch this, sis snapped. I’m average af. And that’s okay. I live an average life with my average family and bf. And most people are average in terms of financial means and lifestyles. Idk why regular degular men think they’d be adding anything special to humanity. Don’t shame someone’s choices and stop acting like your genetics has to be in this world. Plenty of good people and bloodlines are deleted from history. We don’t have control over anything.
Definition of legacy from Google: 1. "an amount of money or property left to someone in a will" 2. "the long-lasting impact of particular events, actions etc. that took place in the past, or of a person's life. Therefore, if you do not have assets or if your life did not impact people/places/ events... you have no legacy. Having kids (offspring) is literally a characteristic of living things - it is not a legacy. Reproducing simply means that you are alive and that your reproductive structures work. A legacy refers to one's OWN life!
1:10 …”that’s what you were born to do.” Really?… meanwhile y’all trap women with babies and then leave them to fend for themselves creating broken families which then leads to all sorts of problems. Our community has been destroyed since slavery! Yes I said it! Trauma passed down and manifested into all of this chaos we see going on. It’s time to wake up ppl and start self loving and healing from this horrible nightmare. And ladies, please don’t listen to that m0r0n✨
The community was destroyed long before slavery. Those same men somd their women and children into slavery as well. So considering how easily they abandon their families now, I shouldn't be surprised
I love love love what is happening with women. I especially love that it is happening with black women. They are leading the pack. And they know how to talk about it so directly and with no b....t. This is finally the liberation we need.
This talking point reminds me of how everyone wanted Chrisean Rock to have a baby to "calm her down" and all I could think was how unfair and how much pressure that is on an unborn child, the attitude of birthing a child for your legacy is way more selfish than staying child free and being self aware imo
It does not shock me that people see babies as tools to be used. They say things like... 1. "Give that man a baby" (as if a baby is an object u can give to someone) 2. "Your baby will change u/love u unconditionally" (u should never depend on anyone outside of u to change u or give u unconditional love that u lack for yourself) This is how trauma continues from generation to generation. My bloodline ends with me... when I am dead, I will be completely unconscious and oblivious to a legacy and to this world.
It still shocks me when men get angry that I decided to remain childfree. I'm talking about men who I'm not even dating. What I do with my body has no bearing on them at all. But you'd think I was denying them something. One guy even told me all women should have kids, no matter the circumstances. No thanks. 🚫
Not him trying to gaslight her hehe I love her she stood her ground 👏👏👏❤️✨there are kids in the system that need parents until they are attended to I am not having kids
It's selfish to finesse a woman to have children then turn her into a baby-momma. They been telling us to choose better now the younger generation is putting that advice into action. These young ladies are realizing their choices are slim.
Making children your legacy is the most selfish thing in the world. Those are real people with hopes and dreams that doesn’t include you just because you gave them some DNA or raised them for a few years, real parents would want their children to live freely, unconcerned about fulfilling some dreams their parents had and couldn’t do so now they live vicariously through the kids, do not be a burden to your children, they don’t deserve that
Exactly and it's sad because this was one of the reasons why my mom decided to have children. Because she wanted to continue her legacy and we grew up in poverty. Our fathers ain't sh!+ The list just goes on. My adoptive father is a wonderful man and he supports my decisions in many things. It's funny how these males don't even take care of their own children😂. Yet they have time for podcasts but not time for their baby mamas.
Michael Jackson and Prince had children but do we talk about their children or do we talk about purple rain and the thriller album? People need to let the legacy argument go. Its a weak argument.
I’ve been a baby sitter, tutor, and professional teacher of preschool aged little ones. I truly believe if more people actually worked with children before having kids, the birth rate would be even lower. Kids are WORK and after having the babies, your life is/should no longer be about self, but the child. I find it so ironic to call a woman who doesn’t want kids selfish when too many parents put their children second, third, and so on. Also, I haven’t wanted kids since age twelve because I deal with mental illness and I absolutely refuse to mess up a kid because of my mental state. All of the parents at my school wondered why I didn’t want kids cause their kids loved me. I always told them I adore the buddies, and I like giving them back. The people talkin’ about “legacy” don’t understand the concept.
How foolish for these dudes to label her as selfish and use the same breath to say that they want to produce whole humans for the expressed purpose of reflecting upon and enhancing themselves. They can't see the forest for the trees😂
I feel that the choice to have children is a choice. However, when it comes to being selfish, baby daddies are the most shelfish people on the face of the earth.
It's selfish to help bring a child into this world and then expect your significant other to take care of all of the child's needs by herself. I love my father, but the dude couldn't even get up to change a diaper in the middle of the night. My mother always had to do it. I commend her. Your child is not you. YOU are your own legacy. Loved her response.
The disgust and vitriol that’s coming from these men. “How could you not want to have children? How do you not want to pass on your legacy?” Sir? How could so many men not not be involved in the raising of these children? Legacy? Tell me about your Great Grandparents. You have no legacy.
I can’t wait to hear what the dusty crew have to say about what legacy is. Real men know what a legacy is and what a lineage is. Words have meanings for a reason.
Thank you! What legacy? The legacy of just existing 🤷🏾♀️ Some people think a legacy is just passing on a last name! You working nowhere and won’t leave your kids anything but at least someone has your last name! I’ve also come to realize that when a women makes decisions for her own body that doesn’t please a man, those women are always labeled as selfish. Don’t want to be pregnant or give birth, you’re selfish. Don’t want to have s3x, you’re selfish and a prude. Don’t want to deal with a struggle love, you’re selfish and unsupportive. Don’t want to be cooking and cleaning up behind him, you’re selfish and unfeminine. Who even cares what they think at this point!
My mom bumped into an old friend last weekend. Friend asked if i made her a grandma yet. Mom said no and i said that i wouldn't have kids. Her friend said that going people say that nowadays. I'm 38. I'm also single and not dating. Yeahhhh. That decision is a done deal. I won't be a single parent. Don't have time for that
Looking at the state of the bc, the last thing we should be passing down is this self hating toxic "legacy". Far too many bm do not deserve to be immortalized. If I knew then what I know today, I would have never married and I certainly wouldn't have blessed this individual with children. If I get another run at it, I'd remain childless and single. That said, bm literally have no other way to tie us down but to saddle us with his children then vilify us for having his children so no one else will bother worth us either. Refusing to bring forth children removes that power from him, leaving him with zero control of the bw. They don't know what to do. Good going, sisters.
@@q.t.gamingfamily Agreed. I came to the conclusion that they are our colonizers. Their eagerness to impregnate is them planting a flag. They know that they have decreased your chances to improve your situation, leave the hood, find another man, escape poverty, build wealth and can also use the child to limit your movement and send you on emotional rollercoasters. It is too late for me but I wish these young women well.
@@cassieg8131well they’re definitely added to our biggest oppressors the way the black men apart of the redpill community pile on black women, it’s like why bother
These dudes need to stop with the gaslighting! I had children because of what I could give to them, not what I wanted from them as a reward for "giving them life." They got it all the way backwards!! 🤦🏾♀️
Chadwick Boseman aka BLACK PANTHER had NO KIDS but a huge legacy. No one ever told him how do you not have kids you have no legacy.
Because he wasn't a woman. Only men are allowed to be their own person apparently.
@@donatellabenn1209Chadwick Boseman did not have any children.
I mean we have Oprah. Look at her legacy. No kids…
@@MiamiPush2theLimit I missed it what did they say
@@lightintheduskIn Patriarchy society, the kids aren’t considered the women’s “decedents/legacy” it’s the male’s decedents.
I love how blunt she was. “That’s selfish” “that’s okay” 🤷🏾♀️
I LOVE IT. Some old dusty lady tried to say the same to me when her own kids don’t even like her
I have two kids - hubby and I happy and people still call us selfish for not having more. Ummm mind your damn business - we good over here. 😌
It's impossible to be selfish towards kids that don't exist on any level.
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾💪🏾🥰
The flabbergasted looks they gave her were priceless.
Easy for the men to want a lineage when they can easily walk away and let the women/mothers do all the hard work of raising the children...
Children aren’t a legacy. They are decendants.
Perpetuating the cycle of generational poverty and fatherlessness are examples of “legacy.”
You’re mistaken lineage and legacy. Children aren’t legacy’s.
@@Sunny-tc3ulthank you. We have some ppl in here that know the difference. They are killing me saying legacy 🥴
NO LIES DETECTED!!!!!! 🥰🙌🏾💯
Exactly! That's exactly it. These men shouldn't be allowed to speak on this, when they aren't the one's giving birth or raisong the child most times.
These men walk out of their kids lives, take issue with child support, beg women to “delete” fetuses, the mom regardless of marital status are the default parent. I just don’t get why they are pro kids when their actions say something else.
They're NOT pro life....they are pro pregnancy, pro control over women and pro keeping women down
@stilljocelyn THIS
💯💯💯💯💯
Exactly.🙄🙄🙄
Those kids are a tool of manipulation for these men.
Your children are your descendants, not your legacy. They are their own person who will make and be responsible for their own choices and create their own legacies.
Yep, the man is confusing legacy with lineage. His actual question should have been "what about your family's lineage?' Legacy is something very different and I am confused why men like this don't know the difference. Legacy is the impact of what they did in their lives, it also is a synonym for inheritance in some contexts.
Yes this, I wonder how come they DON'T know the DIFFERENCE between:# Legacy &
# Lineage
YES!!!
That lady was teaching and eating and didn’t leave no crumbs!!! It’s selfish to have children you don’t want or have anything to give them.
Your whole entire lineage can be ended by a selfish homicidal abuser, a war, a horrible act of violence.
Why do these types of dudes try to sell women rose colored disney glasses? Wtf.
Black men have ZERO business calling anyone selfish.
And have ZERO buisness talking about a legacy
They need to go back to school and learn what those words mean, most of them don't even have a diploma
Males, in general, have no room calling anyone selfish. Males are the very definition of selfish
@@gensai93ain’t this the truth. They don’t even know the difference between legacy and lineage. 🥴 I always wonder do they have any shame? Just saying anything. 🤦🏽♀️
Amen
I mean, having a kid is the easiest way to force a woman to be stuck with that man.
It's the fastest way to root a woman to poverty. Men leave all the time and women aren't stuck with them for that reason alone.
For. Life.
While they (the man) carry on with their lives, make you mesirable, give you a hard time by not providing for the child, blame you for how the child turns out. When you succeed they find ways to bring you down, you find a man who loves you and the kid and they poison the child and make sure the child misbehaves to drive a wedge between you. It's a mess.
They want you tethered to them in case they need you for resources!!
@@empressoflife5954 THIS. #always
Men need to stop confusing having kids for legacy. Legacy is the impact, positive or negative, you have upon the world. But I guess these type of men see having kids as a legacy because they have nothing else.
Now, now.....don't forget their audacity. They have that in abundance
They're confusing legacy with lineage.
Only it's not there legacy because they didn't actually give birth to it there a seed planter not a life giver that's what there confused about and I believe the X chromosome was around longer then the Y chromosome too because there's more of them and there usually stronger cells X chromosomes swim faster too that's why you see men all bummed when she didn't create a son. This whole thing with Adams rib is a lie too females have been around longer they may not have been humans yet but there cells exsisted longer so what actually happened was they planted themselves that's why an X cell can fertilize a female egg but a Y cell needs the female eggs help to be born. Just this formula itself proves God had a mother too not just Jesus he may of thought he was God but he still had a creator and it was a female.
And some of these men are leaving their kids a legacy of poverty.
@@radioqueenbee7008exactly. They don’t want education but want women to have children and they don’t even know what a legacy is.
These are the same BM blaming single Black moms for all world issues, for being single moms and telling them: "shoulda chose better". When these same women heed the writing on the wall and DO "choose better or different", they all act confused. Refer to most recent reactions towards Keke Palmer.This is not just gaslighting, it is sadism🥴🥴🥴
They get angry when black women want better for themselves because then they won’t be able to blame us anymore for the problems in the world and overpopulation
👏👏👏👏👏
🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
Exactly
All they heard was that they won't have access to her or her womb unless they have something to offer. Tell me, what do black men have to offer anyone?
Most men who want kids do not want to be fathers. They just want the title of dad without putting in the effort to parent the kids. That is truly selfish
💯💯‼️
They just want to be able to say my peen made babies nothing more
They'll get a better paycheck as they pretend to be the main family provider when we know is further from the truth
I cannot think of anything more selfish than to bring a child into the world, to glorify yourself.
Exactly and males walk out their child/childrens lives and never look back
Love this statement!
@@kayshawnsimmons5585 yeah he spreaded his seed and walk away.. Saying "byee.. It's your problem now "
@@natural3362 can't fall for their lies, or have hope in males. You will get played everytime
@@kayshawnsimmons5585 yup never trust the wannabe men that much.. I'm gone! Childfree for life
Shout out to ALL the men and women who KNOW they do not want to have kids and stick by that. If child free is the way you want to be, I respect that.
People need to stop having kids on a whim or by accident, they need to actually plan and take responsibility for their actions. Birth control is not that hard to get, especially condoms.
@@gensai93no, they need to be celibate. That's the only way. Plenty of ppl still get pregnant on birth control. Ppl can be fertile as heck.
@@gensai93 I agree. In this day and age there's absolutely no excuse for having an "accidental pregnancy". People have to stop being so reckless with their seeds and their wombs.
Amen!! I’m 41 and decided that kids was not going to be a part of my life!
@@wandak1889 Oh that's dope! Shout out to you, Sis.
Woman: (makes a choice that makes her happy)
Man: "That's selfish."
These males just want us miserable.
As if theyre not living their own lives as selfishly as possible.
Exactly 👍🏼!
Misery loves company!
that AND CONTROL.
That's it That's all!
These men hate that the young girls are waking up and they can’t humble them by trapping them with their kids. I love it! Love it!
Exactly they can’t scare women with this bs anymore and now they’re spiraling
AMEN
@@dinkybossspiraling, that's it! Out of control! Like White Bob and Gina at the party!🤣🤣🤣
Me too, I love this shift that's happening. 🎉😊
to be honest with you, as a male myself, who surely does not have kids, and never will, most of these guys who preach legacy really don't have any idea what they're talking about...reality is, majority of them won't be there for the child, and given how horrible the economy and stock market is, even a lil child support would probably thrown them over the edge.😂...i think most of them have an issue with ego, and just want to create body's as if they're spreading themselves across the globe, i guess a masculinity + ego issue with men not feeling manly enough unless they reproduce..and most will brag about the number of kids they have but you're hear crickets if you really question how involved they are in the child's lives...basically, their assumption is irrelevant unless they can statistically prove otherwise...
They told women to choose better and now that women are, they're mad. That's why women should completely ignore those males. They are mad because they won't have access to women.
Exactly. At this point, I’m rolling my eyes 👀 at women who listen to male foolery, than the males talking this smack. If nobody listens, they would STFU!
I had that EXACT same thought! Make it make sense. 😂😂
YES
Exactly! That's exactly what it is.
They never wanted women to choose better, they just wanted to blame women while gaslighting women into thinking they are giving advice.
Men dislike child free women because your not tied to anyone, your time and resources are free for you, and they hate your freedom ,and would rather see you struggle with a kid. Also they bash single mother's while bashing you for opting out
Yes. I’m childfree and single and it’s like THE THING that irks some of these so called “Alpha males.” (They’re not the real alphas but you know, the self proclaimed ones.) Especially when I’m working on a team with them or apart of some group with them 😅 I’m also quiet so they can’t even say I’m the loud obnoxious type that can’t keep a man. They always try to “humble”me and it doesnt even have to be in response to something I’ve said or done. I’m just there and they start in with all kinds of undermining comments, “guesses” about me, etc etc. Those types are so exhausting to be around.
THIS!!! You’re 💯 right!
@@mrenae6798That is crazy. I peeped this that they just want BW miserable or dead when they insulted Serena and Gabby Sidibe on social media bec these dudes don’t find the two of them attractive. But when both found nonblk men who valued them and commit to them, I was like ok. Y’all just wanted Gabby Sidibe to throw herself over a cliff, and get salty bec somebody else like her and values her.
They want BW at best, miserable and mired in struggle, at worst to just be dead 💀.
They triggered by BW who mind their business a live their lives.
Yes. The men who hate cf women are the same exact men who hate single mothers lol.
@@gensai93exactly. That’s that double talk they always do. You can’t have it both ways especially when those same men are also advocates for not marrying at all. The “it’s just a piece of paper with no benefits” crew.
With the disdain BM have openly expressed towards BW, they've got a lot of nerve calling a single, CF woman selfish and accusing her of not being interested in continuing her "legacy". Perhaps we should point out the BM's legacy to give him a better understanding of the informed decision many BW have made:
THE BLACK MAN'S LEGACY: Black communities overrun with the children of absentee fathers; single mothers sinking deeper into poverty no matter how hard they work; DV & SA by BM on the vulnerable populations within our communities (children, women, elderly, disabled, pets, etc.); toe tagging/deleting a BW every 4.5 hours, which leads to orphaned children, many of whom end up in the foster care system; unsafe neighborhoods where misguided young BM hold entire communities hostage with random acts of violence, drug/gang activity; the risk of harassment or attack if one should happen to cross their path, even when innocently minding their own business; and the abject ignorance generations of BM have marinated in, which has been of no good to anyone, especially themselves. I could go on, but why? BM, take responsibility for your own freaking legacies before you judge BW for no longer participating with you in your race to the bottom. Legacy my A**!
BEAUTIFULLY SAID 💯
@@raecoleman-wf2cpso beautifully said 🥰🤙🏾🌺
This...all of THIS!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
My Black brother has 6 kids by 3 different women. And he wants more. Because he wants to able to drag more women and children into poverty. He knows he can't afford children but...he doesn't care.
It's deeply sick and the reason I cut off ANY contact with him. I've disowned him.
Yes! This comment needs to be pinned. The first thing I said when I saw this, was why are BM having this conversation when they don't take care of the multiple seeds they spread everywhere?
@catmouse2882 good, do these women a solid by giving them his social security number so they can get child support from him. Or go to jail for not paying it. He needs to be held accountable for his choice in ignorance.
What he meant to say was he thinks "Women choosing not to have kids is selfish to *men* " and that hurts men's feelings. It's giving envious, panicked, incubus energy.
They tell us they don't need us, we need them. To create these legacies they can't or won't take care of, they need us.
It is, they act like a child who doesn't even exist is getting mad, when it's the men who are getting their own feelings hurt. It's not women's responsibility to make men feel important, actually do something with your lives and stop thinking that ejaculation makes you special.
These dudes want to weaponize children to ruin BW lives, impoverish BW and keep BW mired in struggle.
This is exactly what he meant. He couldn’t believe a woman wouldn’t want to be tied down with a child by a man that had no intention of staying in that child(ren) life. Now that’s selfish, choosing not to participate at all isn’t.
@@gensai93 they've spent thousands of years subjugating and brainwashing us to have access to our wombs.
Pregnant women also end up getting murd3r3d too by their baby daddy’s
Absolutely, murder is the leading cause of death in pregnancy
@@gensai93yes it is. I’m glad you dropped that fact because I sure was coming to drop it.
They will NEVER address that on their pitiful podcasts and if they do it will be to tear black women down about picking pookie and ray rays and tell women to choose better. Now women are completely opting out, and they are big mad! 😂
Especially pregnant bw!!!
I had a professor at university who had no kids. She dedicated all her energy and passion to her students and she definitely left an important imprint on all of us. She wrote books and helped us understand the benefits of prosocial behaviour from a scientific point of view. That woman definitely created a great legacy.
Simple minded people confuse lineage with legacy.
Simple-minded women listen to this foolery and talk to these males.
Right, which considering the "men" who are talking about this, we shouldn't be surprised
💯
93% illiteracy rate. 😷
The BM is at the bottom of manhood out of all groups of males 🤡🤛🏾👹🤛🏾
Men use double speak i.e. "legacy" instead of the accurate word "family" in order to literally and figuratively distance themselves from the responsibilities of creating a family. The implication is that any kids they accidentally create can be their legacy, nevermind with all the hard stuff like monogomy and familial responsibilities. 😂
Because they use words they don't understand in order to look smart.
Yup!
@@gensai93true because kids are your lineage and descendants, not your legacy
@@gensai9393% illiteracy rate.
These men are so confused. They hate single moms but then they criticize childless women for not being single moms.
Men just desperately want the whole world and it’s women to bend over backwards for them in any and every aspect. That’s why man created this patriarchal society so they can benefit while women get nothing. This boils down to most men’s beliefs that women shouldn’t be held to the highest pedestal simply for existing. Which women contributes so much more than what men give credit for but hey, go off🤷🏾♀️. When in reality: the woman has access to both the physical and spiritual realms especially when it comes to childbirth. She keeps the world going and men know that. They get resentful for many things that women have that they don’t. Not all of course but the ones who don’t posses one dominant/healthy masculine bone in their bodies. As women: we decide to keep this society going or end human extinction. If men fear this, doesn’t this mean they should look within and do what it takes to make sure that still happens? Or will they side with their egos and pride that couldn’t potentially end humanity? Simply because they consistently brainwash themselves they aren’t the problems 🙂↕️🫠
BM believe that once he has a kid with a woman, she becomes a part of his "stable". The more baby-mamas the better. He can always use the kids to remain connected to the mother.
Kids are like bookmarks to Black men.
Exactly 💯 My brother has 6 kids by 3 different women. He looking to get a 4th women to impregnate to add to his "stable"
Blk males have a plantation buck spirit....one of the reasons why I married a non-Black man.
Me and my white, Hispanic husband been together for almost. 18 yrs❤
My brother has created 3 broken homes during that time frame.
He uses the kids as a chain to circle back to the woman to use the kid as an excuse to force the woman to deal with him forever, whenever he wants to be bothered with her. They are the most selfish people on the planet
@@catmouse2882I hope you gave those 3 woman his social security number so they can put him on child support. He needs to be held accountable for his actions.
What a disgusting, parasitic way to live. Yet, they really think they're doing something. It's hard not to see them as a bunch of psycho and sociopaths.
Are these not the same men who abandon their kids, only to tell other men not to date single mothers? These dudes are WICKED out here...
Damn straight. Not only that but when these same women get pregnant the man eliminates the mother and child while she's pregnant. Wonder what he would say to that.
They come to Steal and destroy 🤡🤛🏾👹🤛🏾
Very wicked. Their hatred for BW is appalling.
Statistically black men are the most active fathers. For the ones who aren’t those are the ones that women keeping choosing to take them to pound town.
Love the flight attendant who spoke on what a real legacy is. It NEVER EVER crossed my mind that my children were a legacy. Most people don't even know the names of their great grandparents and where they came from. Poor people, average working class people leave nothing to brag 1, 2 or 3 generations from now. Lets live in reality and not pretense.
That part 👏🏾 And I'll add that being apart of the Black community...Black children are abused at the HIGHEST rates ....by their own parents.
So I find it kinda weird that Black males pressure Black women to procreate when they are the ones who will abuse those children.
This. Moat if their kids will be average. It sounds so pretentious to say legacy. How many of us remember the average people we meet? Its a poor shaming tactic.
I’ve realised It’s mostly how men think. We women don’t see it that way 😅
very true@@gailainsley6939
I am not a woman and I am childfree. One of the reasons I chose to be childfree is because I do not want the responsibility. Much like a lot of deadbeat dads, I do not want the responsibility of parenthood. The difference between me and deadbeats is the fact that I chose not to have children ; I chose to keep my genitalia in my pants; I chose to think with my head instead of my hormones and my ego.
I think childfree people are more aware and empathetic, have more sense and maturity than many parents out there.
As a women, we commend you 👏🏽. We need more self-aware people out here!
Dustie “that’s selfish 👿😤🥺”
Queen “ok 😙😉😁”
I loved that part
Exactly! Trying to shame her for HER own decisions and choices regarding HER own life. What does her life have to do with his dusty behind?!?! 😂
The vast majority of us will not make it into history books or be remembered beyond the next couple generations. What have you done that deserves a legacy, sir? Out here acting like royalty with a royal bloodline.
Also with like 70% of black kids being fatherless, we see how much they care about their so called 'legacy.' They see kids as a trophy they don't have to put any time or energy into.
They don't even claim them. So I don't know why they're so pressed about other people's decisions regarding kids
….but but but, dey wuz kiNgZ and sheeeit.
@@ibabechanel😂😂😂😂
@@ibabechanel😂😂😂😂girl you cracked me up
@@ibabechanel😂😂😂😅 stop it!
I was told twice by two different women, that I was selfish for not having kids. I asked them, who exactly am I being selfish to, the kid that hasn’t been born yet? They couldn’t answer. Men’s opinions mean nothing to me. Letting men have any opinion about me, cross my ears, is a non starter. Choice means you can choose either way and not be put down for either choice.
"Remember black women can die from giving birth". I tell them that everytime. I have one child. The people try to convince me to have more. I say "Are are you gonna help me"? Crickets. 😂
@@athenasol1723
I tell them to write a contract stating that they will provide for my kids that they want me to have.
And I would wdng the best for them, they will need private s hook education, Tutors for bilingual education etc
Some women are internalized by it...these men know how to play with words... this is why I never take men seriously...I take everything they say with a spoon of salt...they will gaslight you..I don't argue with them no more .f them... I'm doing me
Girl at 2:00 is spot on. Your legacy is not your kids. You create your own legacy.
A man told me that..I asked "what legacy are you men leaving? Many black men die with no life insurance and nothing to pass down 😂😂😂
They don't even have a suit 😒😑🤡🤛🏾👹🤛🏾
She got them both together. 😂 They’re reponse of, “that’s selfish” is the equivalent to a man insulting a woman for rejecting him. They resort to the most basic response when they don’t have an actual argument or rebuttal to stand on.
Or attack a woman's looks. That's their first response.
If any man calls you "selfish".....run....run and never look back...
If a man calls u selfish u are doing so something right
haven't they spent the last 2,000 years telling women that the kids are their (men) seeds and legacy. seed of your father etc and women are basically just the incubator for their "seed". Now that women are opting out, all of a sudden, the kids are our "legacies" now. LMAO!
Right, like who is we? Sir I don't speak french 😅
@@user-ol9bo2ei1r😂🤣🤣😭
Not them acting like it's a Matriarchy all of a sudden 🥴
@@Felicite-Etoile😂
Putting responsibility of "legacy" on a child is a form of child labour. I know for a fact my children would need therapy by year 5. I'm a mental health consumer and on my bad days the poor baby would get the basics: food, clothing and shelter and we know thats not enough.
I'm not interested in creating more 9-5 laborors, more therapy clients, more people existing in these polarized not safe for people of color streets, lets not even discuss if my child ends up LGBTQ identified.
Also, Im poor as a dog mom, I dont understand how people make ends meet with dependents. No kids for me.
But a legacy is what the child leaving behind as a man or a woman/ adult. Children aren’t legacy’s. Children build their own legacy’s or just become A regular person… or crackhead or school shooter. A lot of people don’t know the difference between lineage and legacy.
You got sense.
I Agree
Yeah I fully agree. Also, LGBTQ. Not identified. It's not an empty label. It's reality
Dear Black men…
PLEASE… “Shut UP!” 😖
Dear BM, take care of the kids you always have first, before telling people what they should do regarding kids.
@@user-ol9bo2ei1rlove your comment ❤
Hush your mouth🤡🤛🏾💯
@@user-ol9bo2ei1r
P.S. Amen 🙏🏽
She said, she's not having kids, get over it!
They are mad women don't want their sperm anymore 🤡🤛🏾👹🤛🏾
The lady who said that having a child to carry on your legacy is idiocy nailed it! These guy's can't talk about selfish bcuz nothing is more selfish than having a child for a legacy. And these guy's double standards are just too much. 😆 If she has children she's a baby momma and doesn't deserve a good man, and if she doesn't have children she's selfish and not carrying on a legacy. Oh, brother. 🙄
She held her OWN!!!
If you have to clock in everyday you dont have legacy🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
These men not even clocking in to NO JOB though 🤣🤣🤣
Facts
She right though 😫😭🤣
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LEAVE A LEGACY FOR YOUR CHILDREN...YOUR CHILDREN ARE NOT YOUR LEGACY.
We truly live in a sick and disgusting world. As a man, I get called selfish for choosing to be single/unmarried and childfree. In reality, getting married is selfish because you want company, sex and money. Having children is a lot more selfish because you want a mini-me, a caregiver and a legacy. You just wanted a spouse and children for your personal gain. The thing is that the phrase "I want..." indicates that you are selfish.
Really YOU? I think it is great you want to be single as a man. More men need to think like you and STOP pretending you have what it takes to cultivate a successful healthy happy relationship and being a father. Not all men deserve a family and if more men admit that they will be better off. Thanks for your honesty and continue to work on yourself. 😌
Of course I will. Being single/unmarried and childfree are the best decisions I have ever made and I have zero regrets.@@sg5720
Ok dl bro. ✊🏾
Don't let them pressure you... your life your rules.. you didn't kill nobody.... they be the most miserable trying to give you advice...yea no thanks...stay doing you✨
People have kids out of love and yearning too. It’s like 20 years of hard work and sacrifices just to hope your kids will care for you in old age
I never understood somebody calling another person selfish because they didn't want to have children either!! That never sat right with me and never made sense. People who bring kids into the world any old kind of way are selfish!!
They are brainwashed and so they are made you shook of the brainwashing. It's the crab mentality. They just want to bring you down too.
Oprah didn't even want kids!
Agree & her LEGACY is Astronomical
Because Oprah is smart. She's not allowing these males to get in her bag. If she does, go to the sperm bank.
Oprah said in an interview, that she wasn’t “mothered” or “parented” properly, so she didn’t want to have kids.
Oprah has a legacy though, but not decendants. 🎉
She's too busy trafficking them. Please don't use Oprah as an example for us 🙄
She's a horrible person involved in human trafficking, I wouldn't be looking up to her.
There are successful entertainers and public figures who died without having kids and their legacies are just fine. Luther Vandross, Tupac, Billie Holiday, Chadwick Boseman, etc. And there was entertainers like Josephine Baker who never birth any children of her own but adopted. Miss me with that legacy mess and what women are born to do. Just because a woman have eggs doesn't mean she is obligated to push out a child if she doesn't want one. I respect women who say they don't want to have kids. If you know in your heart that you don't want to have kids, why have them? F**k what society tells you to do. What do you want to do? It's your life at the end of the day. It is not selfish to not to have kids.
A real legacy is making an impact and doing something that isn't all about YOU. Having a child is about you.
Oprah is a perfect example. ❤
Why are women treated this way when women don’t want kids or get married, but men are never looked down upon for their choice to not marry or not have kids. It’s a double standard. So is the body count thing. women are allowed to want and enjoy sex without being belittled, degraded or loosing value for it. Why do men get the hype for their body count but women get the opposite? It’s all a crock of shit if you ask me. I’m glad women are speaking up, talking together and no longer centering men, unless they choose to. One cookie cutter traditional lifestyle isn’t right for 100% everyone. I’m so glad things are changing for women. women’s rights have come a long way. 💪 stay strong ladies! And let’s take back women’s sports! We didn’t come all this way to let men into women’s leagues.
I don't understand the body count argument from men. They say that it's normal for men to be promiscuous, but wrong for women to be promiscuous. Who do they expect to have sex with if not women? Each other? Animals? None of them ever go that far because their argument can't hold water. The point is males love promiscuous women, period.
Women are looked down on no matter what because they see us as inferior, that's it. Nothing will change as long as they continue to see women as things not people.
It's called a patriarchal society!
When I look from the outside in- all I see is bigger expectations placed on women cause women seem to be the better human being. It is almost like they expect the best from women cause women give the best. So these men low key admitting that they are shitty human beings without actually saying it, but want to pretend that they are not. I’m so glad women are waking up. We can continue be better for OURSELVES, decenter men is the best thing ALL women can do for themselves😌
@@BayouBarbie504 patriarchy is not the problem. The sexes are different and patriarchy evolved for survival of society. It is not inherently bad but there are people who are badly behaved. Men are men & women are women we are different and so want different things -there will be double standards because of it. If a person doesn't want kids then that's their choice. Those who want w ill find each other. What has changed is society. Traditional roles have been blurred, family values at all time low, economic uncertainty, human n interaction. All this has consequences and affects our beliefs and perception. It's in upheaval now and the distance between the sexes grow as they understand less about each other whilst trying to balance the chaos of the world.
If your legacy is only about having children, you have a pretty awful legacy. Imagine having no desire to have kids except to make yourself look good, and forcing them to continue the cycle because "legacy". That's the legacy of a shitty parent and generational trauma.
Is it a wonder that curse is in the BM community?
They have nothing else to offer but that.
These men think that spreading their "seed" every where is a legacy. I wouldn't have a kid with either one of them ewww.
Many men have kids kn layaway. Come back 20 ish years later and say love me i am your dad..
😂😂
Facts!!! 💯
This!!!! You know they favorite line when they come back too “ your mom kept me away from you” 🤭
Confusing Legacy with Lineage.
This!!!
These dudes simply refuse to recognize the difference between the two 😂
These guys are such bullies but she handled herself like a QUEEN.
And as an outsider looking in, I see how BM treat BW- SOOO proud of BW coming out and schooling these ignorant men- Ladies are opting out all over and it's lovely to see!!
Legacy is a word that a BM would never use on another BM.
You leave a legacy FOR your child to benefit from....children are not the legacy, only someone with no wealth to leave to their children, someone poor thinks the child is the legacy. People who are childless can leave a legacy behind if they accomplish great things in their lifetime.
If they really want a legacy, they can adopt a child themselves. Giving birth today is a terrible idea, considering ALL the problems that come with it. There really is no difference between adoption and birthing in terms of the child being just as valuable. ALL these men want is sex and irresponsibility.
Just here producing additional cogs for the machine of capitalism. If I didn't know my children already, and had the knowledge I have now? I wouldn't have had children. I love my children, but what do they have to look forward to?
My daughter jas told me she doesn't want children and honestly, I can't argue with her. What for? Seriously, if you can't actually afford to provide for your child in the way you want to? Do not have them. There is a regret that comes from your child being limited by money and opportunity that cannot be erased.
This comment needs to be pinned. Thank you for telling the truth about this and being so transparent
sooooo happy she was able to dish out the bs they were trying to serve her. these men are bozos
Whole clowns jumping out that tiny clown car🤡🤛🏾
She had him so confused his lacefront was lifting 😂😂😂
People remember Cleopatra as the queen of Egypt, they don't remember her son. His name was Caesarion, and he is Caesars son.....yall didn't even think about that when you thought about her legacy.
These men are so tedious. Your “legacy” is the impact *you* leave on this earth. It’s how you are remembered and regarded. All I see is control slowly slipping away and they’re losing their sht bc they won’t be able to come back and wreak havoc on the world generations later 😂😂
The gen z girl is so right and I’m so glad young girls are hearing this!!
She's a Millennial. Gen Z starts at 26 but I think she's 28.
@@chitlinjuice oh I thought she was younger
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾💪🏾🥰
I’ve only had women tell me not to have kids…Men always question it
I agree with her theres definitely people out there that talk about passing down a legacy to their kids but don’t have anything to pass down to them but trauma. I don’t think they really care about legacy at all.
Right, trauma and poverty
Men like him are pro kid, because they have the choice to walk away once the child is conceieved/ born. They knock the woman up and then walk away, leaving her to be a single parent. Surprisingly, they go all shocked Pikachu face when later on their legacy is nothing but abandonment and struggle and poverty.
"F**k them kids."🤣🤣🤣
I AGREE WITH U 100 PERCENT!!!!!!
Girl I cried when I heard that at the very beginning 😂😂😂
2:18 “A Legacy of Debt!” Touché Sis! Touché!
Most BM don’t usually deeply consider the future like that. Of course they would only care about legacy in terms of what they demand someone else to do. Legacy is accomplishments, and leaving your family in better circumstances than before. How many BM even have a life insurance policy and have taken the time to write an official will? Sperm meeting an egg is not an accomplishment.
Right my MIA sperm donor disappeared for uhhh my whole life then randomly decided he wanted to have a relationship at his nearly 70 years of age 😂 I’m good
Bruh. I had to rewatch this, sis snapped. I’m average af. And that’s okay. I live an average life with my average family and bf. And most people are average in terms of financial means and lifestyles. Idk why regular degular men think they’d be adding anything special to humanity. Don’t shame someone’s choices and stop acting like your genetics has to be in this world. Plenty of good people and bloodlines are deleted from history. We don’t have control over anything.
I keep telling folks. Having kids is nothing more than narcissism or desperation to keep a relationship. Period.
That Part💯
🎯 frrr
@@kass2086 scary ain’t it?
My mother told me that whether I have children or not I don't have to justify my decision to anyone.
Definition of legacy from Google:
1. "an amount of money or property left to someone in a will"
2. "the long-lasting impact of particular events, actions etc. that took place in the past, or of a person's life.
Therefore, if you do not have assets or if your life did not impact people/places/ events... you have no legacy. Having kids (offspring) is literally a characteristic of living things - it is not a legacy. Reproducing simply means that you are alive and that your reproductive structures work. A legacy refers to one's OWN life!
I’m not having kids. Let me work on me. 🤷🏾♀️
1:10 …”that’s what you were born to do.” Really?… meanwhile y’all trap women with babies and then leave them to fend for themselves creating broken families which then leads to all sorts of problems. Our community has been destroyed since slavery! Yes I said it! Trauma passed down and manifested into all of this chaos we see going on. It’s time to wake up ppl and start self loving and healing from this horrible nightmare. And ladies, please don’t listen to that m0r0n✨
The community was destroyed long before slavery. Those same men somd their women and children into slavery as well. So considering how easily they abandon their families now, I shouldn't be surprised
@@user-ol9bo2ei1r yea you’re absolutely right ✨
I love love love what is happening with women. I especially love that it is happening with black women. They are leading the pack. And they know how to talk about it so directly and with no b....t. This is finally the liberation we need.
Not enough BW are getting the message.
This talking point reminds me of how everyone wanted Chrisean Rock to have a baby to "calm her down" and all I could think was how unfair and how much pressure that is on an unborn child, the attitude of birthing a child for your legacy is way more selfish than staying child free and being self aware imo
No fr I thought they on crack..she is not mentally stable for a baby... babies require so much attention which they rightfully deserve
It does not shock me that people see babies as tools to be used. They say things like...
1. "Give that man a baby" (as if a baby is an object u can give to someone)
2. "Your baby will change u/love u unconditionally" (u should never depend on anyone outside of u to change u or give u unconditional love that u lack for yourself)
This is how trauma continues from generation to generation. My bloodline ends with me... when I am dead, I will be completely unconscious and oblivious to a legacy and to this world.
It still shocks me when men get angry that I decided to remain childfree. I'm talking about men who I'm not even dating. What I do with my body has no bearing on them at all. But you'd think I was denying them something. One guy even told me all women should have kids, no matter the circumstances. No thanks. 🚫
Please what credit do women get from having kids? Unless they are serial murders...
😂😂😂😂
Creating more slaves for the system
Exactly
😂 never thought of it that way .
We still have men talking about legacies in 2023 😂??! We ain't bringing that to 2024 please.
💯💯💯
They have nothing to give a child. They walk away from parenting before the child is born 🤡🤛🏾👹🤛🏾
When men hear " im not having kids" i think they perceive that as a woman saying they dont want or need a man. And they get offended
🎯
Not him trying to gaslight her hehe I love her she stood her ground 👏👏👏❤️✨there are kids in the system that need parents until they are attended to I am not having kids
It's selfish to finesse a woman to have children then turn her into a baby-momma. They been telling us to choose better now the younger generation is putting that advice into action. These young ladies are realizing their choices are slim.
Making children your legacy is the most selfish thing in the world. Those are real people with hopes and dreams that doesn’t include you just because you gave them some DNA or raised them for a few years, real parents would want their children to live freely, unconcerned about fulfilling some dreams their parents had and couldn’t do so now they live vicariously through the kids, do not be a burden to your children, they don’t deserve that
Exactly and it's sad because this was one of the reasons why my mom decided to have children. Because she wanted to continue her legacy and we grew up in poverty. Our fathers ain't sh!+ The list just goes on. My adoptive father is a wonderful man and he supports my decisions in many things. It's funny how these males don't even take care of their own children😂. Yet they have time for podcasts but not time for their baby mamas.
Having kids for bums is a death sentence
1:40 "You live like a peasant, so what is your legacy?" Ayo 😂😂😂😭😭
Michael Jackson and Prince had children but do we talk about their children or do we talk about purple rain and the thriller album?
People need to let the legacy argument go. Its a weak argument.
Exactly, Prince had one child who died very young, that doesn't have anything to do with his Legacy, and his Musical Success
I’ve been a baby sitter, tutor, and professional teacher of preschool aged little ones. I truly believe if more people actually worked with children before having kids, the birth rate would be even lower. Kids are WORK and after having the babies, your life is/should no longer be about self, but the child. I find it so ironic to call a woman who doesn’t want kids selfish when too many parents put their children second, third, and so on.
Also, I haven’t wanted kids since age twelve because I deal with mental illness and I absolutely refuse to mess up a kid because of my mental state. All of the parents at my school wondered why I didn’t want kids cause their kids loved me. I always told them I adore the buddies, and I like giving them back.
The people talkin’ about “legacy” don’t understand the concept.
Having kids just because u can is crazy. No 18 years of servitude and worries
Women think so deeply about motherhood and men couldn’t give two shits about fatherhood outside of the kids being made
Having a child is a selfish act… not having a child is a selfless act. Both self less and selfish acts have a purpose in this world.
EXACTLY 💯
How foolish for these dudes to label her as selfish and use the same breath to say that they want to produce whole humans for the expressed purpose of reflecting upon and enhancing themselves.
They can't see the forest for the trees😂
It's the ego!!!
I feel that the choice to have children is a choice. However, when it comes to being selfish, baby daddies are the most shelfish people on the face of the earth.
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They will be so quick to abandon and leave you as a single mother, becoming a deadbeat.. but wanna talk about being selfish lol.
@@strudelhTHIS.
It's selfish to help bring a child into this world and then expect your significant other to take care of all of the child's needs by herself. I love my father, but the dude couldn't even get up to change a diaper in the middle of the night. My mother always had to do it. I commend her. Your child is not you. YOU are your own legacy. Loved her response.
The disgust and vitriol that’s coming from these men. “How could you not want to have children? How do you not want to pass on your legacy?” Sir? How could so many men not not be involved in the raising of these children? Legacy? Tell me about your Great Grandparents. You have no legacy.
I can’t wait to hear what the dusty crew have to say about what legacy is. Real men know what a legacy is and what a lineage is. Words have meanings for a reason.
Thank you! What legacy? The legacy of just existing 🤷🏾♀️ Some people think a legacy is just passing on a last name! You working nowhere and won’t leave your kids anything but at least someone has your last name! I’ve also come to realize that when a women makes decisions for her own body that doesn’t please a man, those women are always labeled as selfish. Don’t want to be pregnant or give birth, you’re selfish. Don’t want to have s3x, you’re selfish and a prude. Don’t want to deal with a struggle love, you’re selfish and unsupportive. Don’t want to be cooking and cleaning up behind him, you’re selfish and unfeminine. Who even cares what they think at this point!
My mom bumped into an old friend last weekend. Friend asked if i made her a grandma yet. Mom said no and i said that i wouldn't have kids. Her friend said that going people say that nowadays. I'm 38. I'm also single and not dating. Yeahhhh. That decision is a done deal. I won't be a single parent. Don't have time for that
If you don't want to have children, don't.
Children should be wanted and adored.
Lineage and legacy are not the same.
Looking at the state of the bc, the last thing we should be passing down is this self hating toxic "legacy". Far too many bm do not deserve to be immortalized. If I knew then what I know today, I would have never married and I certainly wouldn't have blessed this individual with children. If I get another run at it, I'd remain childless and single. That said, bm literally have no other way to tie us down but to saddle us with his children then vilify us for having his children so no one else will bother worth us either. Refusing to bring forth children removes that power from him, leaving him with zero control of the bw. They don't know what to do. Good going, sisters.
@@q.t.gamingfamily Agreed. I came to the conclusion that they are our colonizers. Their eagerness to impregnate is them planting a flag. They know that they have decreased your chances to improve your situation, leave the hood, find another man, escape poverty, build wealth and can also use the child to limit your movement and send you on emotional rollercoasters. It is too late for me but I wish these young women well.
@@cassieg8131well they’re definitely added to our biggest oppressors the way the black men apart of the redpill community pile on black women, it’s like why bother
A career is way way way more fulfilling. 31 and child free 🎉🎉🎉
They just want to see a "mini me" walking around.
Except they don’t. They don’t even want to spend time with their kids.
These dudes need to stop with the gaslighting! I had children because of what I could give to them, not what I wanted from them as a reward for "giving them life." They got it all the way backwards!! 🤦🏾♀️
These men will cry like bastard when they have to pay child support and spouse support 😂