GROWING UP WITH ASIAN MOMS BE LIKE:
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- Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
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She ain't wrong tho.
I'm at a stage where I'll be applying for Universities in a few months but now I don't even know what I want to be anymore.
Same here! At this point I feel like I’m living my life for my mom LOL
Was at that point. Still am. Been in uni for 5 years but because i keep changing degrees, I'll be here for another couple. From my experience, i wish i had picked a degree that i was somewhat interested in (if even a little), was in demand, and just stuck with it. No matter how boring some subjects are or if you think you want to drop out, if you're not certain about what else you would be doing or what degree you want to change to for your newfound dream career, just continue. Degrees like Engineering and Nursing are solid choices right now. But what I regret most of all, as someone who came out of highschool with no clue as to what i wanted to do, was not taking a gap year just to explore different options. Take time to go travel, volunteer, or work to save some money and/or try things you may be interested in. Maybe shadow professionals in an industry you're curious about or do some free courses online (these are really good because they can even land you industry jobs). Time goes by so quickly and I would've much preferred taking a year off to explore myself right out of highschool than 'exploring' different careers my changing degrees every semester, building debt and not utilizing my time wisely. One degree can lead to many different careers in your lifetime, even if they're not related. So don't fret like i did about finding the 'perfect' degree to choose. Apologies about the length of this post, just thought I would share my own experience if there was even the slightest possibility it helps you (or anyone else) out.
Same I don’t know what I want to do like I have zero idea
OMG I'm literally studying a course that I don't even like because my dad said so
I'm in last year of hs and even tho I say I have planned for future I honestly have nothing planned I don't even know what I want anymore a year break sounds so good but my mom thinks it's wastage of my time and life idek what to do anymore
Can relate to it, having asian parents, I don't even know what I want to become, they chose the path already and I'm following it😀
I’ve seen others say they wish they weren’t Asian because of this
@Saishaaa! doesn't matter, we are still asian.
damn ashley spitting facts. this hits so close to home
and then bc they made such big sacrifices u jus feel guilty for not following their path
Now I know why I never know what I want in my life and the reason I feel guilty when I didn't following them
On my side, it's my father mostly. They perceived me as smart and I am also the eldest and I have the pressure to chose a program that will really pay big in the future.
I live in a comfortable life because of them but also because of that, I am struggling in college because I don't want to take any risk. I think the only risk I had taken was to shift to a program I really like (but it looks like they were reluctant to it)
I’m proud that you went to a program that you enjoyed instead 😊 Keep making decisions that you think are best for You ❤
1000%, when I was a kid I wanted to be a artist, teacher, cook, chemist, and musician. Then my mom keeps pushing medical worker on me, so I went with forensics. Now that I actually think about it, when I think of “career,” nothing comes to mind except for what my mother wants. I think if I had to pick anything for myself, I’d just want to open a little cafe and live peacefully, I don’t need to be filthy rich, or working 3 jobs at a time with 30 degrees
Opening a café would be a dream to me too....but since it's risky and hard in the beginning I wanna start somewhere safer...idk if I will ever get to have my own café
@@rey8194 All the people who dream of having their own cafe should band together and we should start our own company 😭😭
Damn...I felt that
I do agree. When I was younger I used to love reading and I wanted to be an author or something along that road. But the thing is I was also good at studies and usually either come 1st Or 2nd in class, so my occupation was decided to be a doctor. Now that I have became a doctor it just feels empty inside. I do like treating patients, and I like to see their happy faces when they go home all cured. But I don't love it. And my hobby of reading has also just died down over the time.
And if I dive into my mother's mind, I think she just wanted comfortable life for me, since I come from middle class household there were many things I couldn't have growing up, I think that she just wanted me to have comfortable life. And comfort= money according to her. I don't hate her but j wish I had a choice.
Never related to ANYTHING this much
I do agree because as an Asian myself, it can be so suffocating with an Asian mom, they want you to do what they think is the best not what you think is best for yourself
She is so right
Like I don't even know what I want to do in life anymore. Gone are all the dreams and passions for things that I used to love.
I'm so glad she finally addressed it as a PROBLEM. I see so many ppl trying to shake toxic stuff off by saying "oh it's the culture," "It only seems bad to you because you're from another country," like NO.
This one hit close
I understand both the parents' and the kids' situation. The trouble is they dont know where to draw a line. While the kids must have their choice, they should also have a safety net to fall back if they fail.
And parents should trust their kid and let go. At the end its their life
she's definitely so true in saying all that...and sometimes its so out of hand that it becomes toxic for the child to cope up with the dynamic world outside.
omg so relatable. also this sometimes leads to problems with adulting, like you feel like you are not ready for it and just continue studying endless gradschool
I agree 💯 percent. Most of those decisions ruined my life.
💯True...when i was younger, i wanted to be air hostess, painter, singer....BUT my mother set my boundaries to be a doctor, she tells me to be like that topper friend of mine or how i was better in the past... Like mostly asians teenagers can relate...fr they decide our hobbies, whom we become friends with, which stream we take, in which program we can participate or hang out EVEN when we should go to school or not...i dont know anymore...recently my teachers and friends are saying i have anxiety, like I feel it too.... we know parents can be protective or strict but now i think childern with chill parents have a better teenage...I wish I had a choice.
Wow Insightful Wise Observation+ intuition+ Discernment +Positive Criticism Judgement.
This is 100% true, I already graduated from college without even knowing what I want to do in life. TBH, I'm just alive because I'm breathing.
Wow she described my life in one video
Same, but for me it’s the Asian dad, my mom’s the more ‘chill’ one in comparison to my dad
OK but I grew up in the complete opposite way. My parents always let me decide and assured that they would be proud of me no matter what I did. In general that sounds fine but now I have no freaking idea what I want to do with my life. I wish someone would have pushed me in some kind of direction.
my mom is asian and i cant really relate too this but she supports me in everything ☺️
I’m so glad that my mom is Asian and my dad is white. They both learned from their different upbringings what was damaging and what helped. They brought both points of view and made me a very well rounded person. I’m very thankful that they did not pressure me into something I didn’t want. They always told me find something you love to do and figure out how you can make money to survive from it. They want me to achieve my goals but also remind me to be realistic. ♥️
This is so true but my father and my grand mother are saying this
Piano, ballet, karate, judo, lots of tutions etc in most chinese, korean, japanese culture for most rich to middle income family.
It happens in other ethnicities, too. With other ethnicities, they let their children make their own decisions. If a parent or parents push their children and demand what a child should or shouldn't do, a child will end up resenting their parents in the long run. If your child(ren)wants to be a singer, a doctor, or any occupation they want to be in, support them. We, as parents, are our children's biggest support. If they can't turn to us for support, they will turn to someone else for that support. 🙏🏽❤
thats so true oh my word.
i had to start competitive swimming as a hobby and i recently quit since i need to now focus on academics and so i am since im gonna be needing to do something in the medical field when im in university in order to live a sustainable life. At least thats what my mother said
But in my case it's not that I'm suffering.... She knows what I'm capable off and she guided me how to achieve that..... She knows my aim ... And right now I'm very satisfied where I am 😊😊😊😊
She's literally speaking facts bc of this I don't know what I want to be I don't know what my hobbies are i don't know these stuffs about myself everday I lie about what I like to do Cuz seeing other kids love this or that makes me jealous and I end up lying that I like that too
Not knowing what you want to do may not be a serious problem when your path is set.. but if you know what you want that can be a serious problem
That's true, and I felt like I don't know what I have to do after graduating from my university later 😵😵
So truuu 😢
i think its up to our generation to do this. i let my kids decide. i knew when i was a kid that this was not how i wanted my kids to grow up, so i made sure once i had kids, that they had the opportunities that my parents didnt allow. as far as i could remember, i was told to be a nurse... it was a nightmare and wasnt what i wanted to do!
guess my white mom is secretly asian
I’m already on the Asian mom path along with my cousins, all three are junior Olympians , Eagle Scounts, Play piano and are all A’s and above
Same for African too like we all livin the same life
damn this just described my whole life 😭
Not only Asians, my mom is a Latina and she does this. My dad doesn’t really care but my mom does 😅
I have Asian parents and I don’t know what I want anymore
This is true but not to all Asian families though Brest my parents are letting us kids choose what we want to do and I still have no idea yet lol
Watching her to improve my IELTS Speaking band :>>
I love seeing videos like this and how differently we grew up, and sometimes I wish I had parents somewhere to yours. It was great to learn independence at such a young age by choosing what I wanted and when I didn’t like, but if felt like my parents didn’t care because they didn’t believe I could do much. I probably wouldn’t go as far as saying that I want a very controlling parent, but I wish there were a middle ground where I had a parent who gently forced me to do certain things and cared about my education. Now I’m in university, and it feels like no matter what I do, I am not proud of what I do because there’s no support behind it; no one is proud of me because it was my choice. I hope it makes sense. I just wanted a parent who showed that they cared enough to be a guide.
Its bc most of our asian families come from a migration backgrounf or are middle class thats why our families struggle with money so moms want us to have a more comfortable life for us and our future kids
so relatable !!!
The most relatable one tho
Cause I feel like I'm stuck
oh yeah that’s damn right cuz at first I really wanted to major in psychology but now i’m just gonna do computer science because my mom wants it and not me :) still making psychology a backup plan tho ✌🏿
This is true. I recently just graduated cc and this 11 year old graduated too. He doesn't really look too happy but the mom was.
It's mostly my dad though
But I want to build a boat with no traintracks and open waters
It's the same with African moms too
And now i know why ive never known what i wanted in life
Yes. We should look for progress. Not goals.
Unpopular opinion - i like the way asians r brought up under supervision, by this way their lives r less fuvked up,..less substance abuse,less abortion, less unwanted pregnancy,.. More carrier oriented childs & more organised life😊 love it this way
Same I like that there is more structure and discipline in most Asian families and that there is a goal to strive for
Choooi ash
North African baby and feels relatable
Oh she's talking abt me 🫤🤚
Not only Asian parents 😭
TRUE TRUE
I dont think its that wrong if you see it from their perspective. They dont want you to make the same mistakes.
That’s why I’m not going to college. Just work and live.
💯💯💯
My mom is asian and she always decided my hobbies and everything. But I actually know what I want, but im to scared to say that, so I just follow her way.
Its so frustrating.
I can feel her my mom even expects me to hate the same people as she does 😭 like kpop etc. Just becaus she doesnt like this kind of music
It depends on which Asian country you live in and your status...
I'm an asian, an indian to be precise but luckily my parents never forced me into things I didn't want to do. my parents would love to see me be a doctor but I wanna do engineering nd they never force me into medical. it makes me feels pretty liberal but they'll never support choices like music or art(iykyk indian parents)
facts
legit
Return Of Investment 😂
Exactly what's going on in my life 😐
Afrikan parents/family be on that too...
Your look, college, degree(s), career, husband/wife, where you'll live (basically next door), kids, everything is decided for you...
It's not love, it's control...Most of our elders/parents fell for the game and never got to do what they wanted to do or were sent here to do b/c they followed the path that a family member created for them like the elder before them...This just leads to living bicuriously through the kids...
Nope, I'm not sorry I'm not that doctor/lawyer and decided to work for myself...#HappyBlacksheep
But I do agree
How do I send this to my mom?!?!?!?
Ayo ain't this ma momma 🤣
She told me to pursue a postgrad, which is a masters
I'll be graduating with a bachelor's degree soon and honestly? I really just wanna go work in some boring corporate company just so I can live my life paycheck after paycheck.
But no, she wants me to further my studies because "everyone is a degree holder now, to get better pay you must get a masters."
She's willing to dig out the $ with my dad to pay for my fees but it was almost experiencing a tough hangover.
If u dont know what u want,, at least list everything u dont want at first
Invert always invert
What's this episode?
This so intresting... i really want watch... but i can't find full ep
Most pacific families are the same..
My fathers like that and then he blames me for not having an idea of what to do with my life at 16 💀
*nod *nod
It's similar in Indian culture
😮 😮😮😮
Especially when you've met ur hubby at like age 5 and u know u can't get out of it once u turn 16
(Just someone I know)
I'll be that Parent
Hm.
Who is she?
ashley choi, former idol and member of ladies' code
She isnt wrong tho..
Too controlling.
What can we do?? ... if we let them to be... all they want to be ... mediocre musician.... tattooed and call themselves THEM