GROWING UP WITH ASIAN MOMS BE LIKE:

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  • Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
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Комментарии • 110

  • @bonbonbonita
    @bonbonbonita Год назад +1753

    She ain't wrong tho.
    I'm at a stage where I'll be applying for Universities in a few months but now I don't even know what I want to be anymore.

    • @izboobatea
      @izboobatea Год назад +53

      Same here! At this point I feel like I’m living my life for my mom LOL

    • @DustyEditing
      @DustyEditing Год назад +31

      Was at that point. Still am. Been in uni for 5 years but because i keep changing degrees, I'll be here for another couple. From my experience, i wish i had picked a degree that i was somewhat interested in (if even a little), was in demand, and just stuck with it. No matter how boring some subjects are or if you think you want to drop out, if you're not certain about what else you would be doing or what degree you want to change to for your newfound dream career, just continue. Degrees like Engineering and Nursing are solid choices right now. But what I regret most of all, as someone who came out of highschool with no clue as to what i wanted to do, was not taking a gap year just to explore different options. Take time to go travel, volunteer, or work to save some money and/or try things you may be interested in. Maybe shadow professionals in an industry you're curious about or do some free courses online (these are really good because they can even land you industry jobs). Time goes by so quickly and I would've much preferred taking a year off to explore myself right out of highschool than 'exploring' different careers my changing degrees every semester, building debt and not utilizing my time wisely. One degree can lead to many different careers in your lifetime, even if they're not related. So don't fret like i did about finding the 'perfect' degree to choose. Apologies about the length of this post, just thought I would share my own experience if there was even the slightest possibility it helps you (or anyone else) out.

    • @tulsipatel4008
      @tulsipatel4008 Год назад +4

      Same I don’t know what I want to do like I have zero idea

    • @BaddieEnergy05
      @BaddieEnergy05 Год назад +3

      OMG I'm literally studying a course that I don't even like because my dad said so

    • @yourdogspeakschinese9306
      @yourdogspeakschinese9306 Год назад +4

      I'm in last year of hs and even tho I say I have planned for future I honestly have nothing planned I don't even know what I want anymore a year break sounds so good but my mom thinks it's wastage of my time and life idek what to do anymore

  • @aishu_k02
    @aishu_k02 Год назад +736

    Can relate to it, having asian parents, I don't even know what I want to become, they chose the path already and I'm following it😀

    • @gwenmloveskpopandmore
      @gwenmloveskpopandmore Год назад +8

      I’ve seen others say they wish they weren’t Asian because of this

    • @shubhashniii
      @shubhashniii Год назад +8

      ​@Saishaaa! doesn't matter, we are still asian.

  • @sebongies713
    @sebongies713 Год назад +200

    damn ashley spitting facts. this hits so close to home

  • @msc3181
    @msc3181 Год назад +380

    and then bc they made such big sacrifices u jus feel guilty for not following their path

  • @christinewu2903
    @christinewu2903 Год назад +123

    Now I know why I never know what I want in my life and the reason I feel guilty when I didn't following them

  • @im_a_hooman3599
    @im_a_hooman3599 Год назад +121

    On my side, it's my father mostly. They perceived me as smart and I am also the eldest and I have the pressure to chose a program that will really pay big in the future.
    I live in a comfortable life because of them but also because of that, I am struggling in college because I don't want to take any risk. I think the only risk I had taken was to shift to a program I really like (but it looks like they were reluctant to it)

    • @michelle0945
      @michelle0945 Год назад +4

      I’m proud that you went to a program that you enjoyed instead 😊 Keep making decisions that you think are best for You ❤

  • @Winter61742
    @Winter61742 Год назад +85

    1000%, when I was a kid I wanted to be a artist, teacher, cook, chemist, and musician. Then my mom keeps pushing medical worker on me, so I went with forensics. Now that I actually think about it, when I think of “career,” nothing comes to mind except for what my mother wants. I think if I had to pick anything for myself, I’d just want to open a little cafe and live peacefully, I don’t need to be filthy rich, or working 3 jobs at a time with 30 degrees

    • @rey8194
      @rey8194 7 месяцев назад

      Opening a café would be a dream to me too....but since it's risky and hard in the beginning I wanna start somewhere safer...idk if I will ever get to have my own café

    • @Winter61742
      @Winter61742 7 месяцев назад

      @@rey8194 All the people who dream of having their own cafe should band together and we should start our own company 😭😭

  • @I_am_malfoy_draco_malfoy
    @I_am_malfoy_draco_malfoy Год назад +77

    Damn...I felt that

  • @preetipatel5512
    @preetipatel5512 Год назад +24

    I do agree. When I was younger I used to love reading and I wanted to be an author or something along that road. But the thing is I was also good at studies and usually either come 1st Or 2nd in class, so my occupation was decided to be a doctor. Now that I have became a doctor it just feels empty inside. I do like treating patients, and I like to see their happy faces when they go home all cured. But I don't love it. And my hobby of reading has also just died down over the time.
    And if I dive into my mother's mind, I think she just wanted comfortable life for me, since I come from middle class household there were many things I couldn't have growing up, I think that she just wanted me to have comfortable life. And comfort= money according to her. I don't hate her but j wish I had a choice.

  • @khushidey2246
    @khushidey2246 Год назад +40

    Never related to ANYTHING this much

  • @jyangtoho
    @jyangtoho Год назад +4

    I do agree because as an Asian myself, it can be so suffocating with an Asian mom, they want you to do what they think is the best not what you think is best for yourself

  • @Wolfchanismybias
    @Wolfchanismybias Год назад +4

    She is so right
    Like I don't even know what I want to do in life anymore. Gone are all the dreams and passions for things that I used to love.

  • @saloosahernandez9725
    @saloosahernandez9725 Год назад +3

    I'm so glad she finally addressed it as a PROBLEM. I see so many ppl trying to shake toxic stuff off by saying "oh it's the culture," "It only seems bad to you because you're from another country," like NO.

  • @canvos3562
    @canvos3562 Год назад +14

    This one hit close

  • @totallytwisted
    @totallytwisted Год назад +6

    I understand both the parents' and the kids' situation. The trouble is they dont know where to draw a line. While the kids must have their choice, they should also have a safety net to fall back if they fail.
    And parents should trust their kid and let go. At the end its their life

  • @readingwithlisha
    @readingwithlisha Год назад +2

    she's definitely so true in saying all that...and sometimes its so out of hand that it becomes toxic for the child to cope up with the dynamic world outside.

  • @subaksea3579
    @subaksea3579 Год назад +3

    omg so relatable. also this sometimes leads to problems with adulting, like you feel like you are not ready for it and just continue studying endless gradschool

  • @robbydelacruz3159
    @robbydelacruz3159 6 месяцев назад +1

    I agree 💯 percent. Most of those decisions ruined my life.

  • @dishakayal5706
    @dishakayal5706 7 месяцев назад +1

    💯True...when i was younger, i wanted to be air hostess, painter, singer....BUT my mother set my boundaries to be a doctor, she tells me to be like that topper friend of mine or how i was better in the past... Like mostly asians teenagers can relate...fr they decide our hobbies, whom we become friends with, which stream we take, in which program we can participate or hang out EVEN when we should go to school or not...i dont know anymore...recently my teachers and friends are saying i have anxiety, like I feel it too.... we know parents can be protective or strict but now i think childern with chill parents have a better teenage...I wish I had a choice.

  • @addicted2artlikethe_flints611
    @addicted2artlikethe_flints611 Год назад

    Wow Insightful Wise Observation+ intuition+ Discernment +Positive Criticism Judgement.

  • @kindledbirdcage
    @kindledbirdcage Год назад +4

    This is 100% true, I already graduated from college without even knowing what I want to do in life. TBH, I'm just alive because I'm breathing.

  • @Excuseme_itsme
    @Excuseme_itsme Год назад +2

    Wow she described my life in one video

  • @SimplerDays
    @SimplerDays 10 месяцев назад

    Same, but for me it’s the Asian dad, my mom’s the more ‘chill’ one in comparison to my dad

  • @itsalex8520
    @itsalex8520 Год назад +5

    OK but I grew up in the complete opposite way. My parents always let me decide and assured that they would be proud of me no matter what I did. In general that sounds fine but now I have no freaking idea what I want to do with my life. I wish someone would have pushed me in some kind of direction.

  • @Hearts4w0nu.
    @Hearts4w0nu. Год назад +1

    my mom is asian and i cant really relate too this but she supports me in everything ☺️

  • @chaoticsad5549
    @chaoticsad5549 Год назад +1

    I’m so glad that my mom is Asian and my dad is white. They both learned from their different upbringings what was damaging and what helped. They brought both points of view and made me a very well rounded person. I’m very thankful that they did not pressure me into something I didn’t want. They always told me find something you love to do and figure out how you can make money to survive from it. They want me to achieve my goals but also remind me to be realistic. ♥️

  • @blossom_5219
    @blossom_5219 Год назад +2

    This is so true but my father and my grand mother are saying this

  • @jessicamong1586
    @jessicamong1586 Год назад

    Piano, ballet, karate, judo, lots of tutions etc in most chinese, korean, japanese culture for most rich to middle income family.

  • @bossmin0422
    @bossmin0422 8 месяцев назад

    It happens in other ethnicities, too. With other ethnicities, they let their children make their own decisions. If a parent or parents push their children and demand what a child should or shouldn't do, a child will end up resenting their parents in the long run. If your child(ren)wants to be a singer, a doctor, or any occupation they want to be in, support them. We, as parents, are our children's biggest support. If they can't turn to us for support, they will turn to someone else for that support. 🙏🏽❤

  • @starei
    @starei Год назад +1

    thats so true oh my word.
    i had to start competitive swimming as a hobby and i recently quit since i need to now focus on academics and so i am since im gonna be needing to do something in the medical field when im in university in order to live a sustainable life. At least thats what my mother said

  • @riyabharadwaz4406
    @riyabharadwaz4406 Год назад

    But in my case it's not that I'm suffering.... She knows what I'm capable off and she guided me how to achieve that..... She knows my aim ... And right now I'm very satisfied where I am 😊😊😊😊

  • @dareen5358
    @dareen5358 Год назад +1

    She's literally speaking facts bc of this I don't know what I want to be I don't know what my hobbies are i don't know these stuffs about myself everday I lie about what I like to do Cuz seeing other kids love this or that makes me jealous and I end up lying that I like that too

  • @jihunIee
    @jihunIee Год назад +1

    Not knowing what you want to do may not be a serious problem when your path is set.. but if you know what you want that can be a serious problem

  • @starlove6726
    @starlove6726 Год назад +2

    That's true, and I felt like I don't know what I have to do after graduating from my university later 😵😵

  • @rizkidwirachmasari8001
    @rizkidwirachmasari8001 6 месяцев назад +1

    So truuu 😢

  • @angelfrankenfine
    @angelfrankenfine 7 месяцев назад

    i think its up to our generation to do this. i let my kids decide. i knew when i was a kid that this was not how i wanted my kids to grow up, so i made sure once i had kids, that they had the opportunities that my parents didnt allow. as far as i could remember, i was told to be a nurse... it was a nightmare and wasnt what i wanted to do!

  • @pseudopulk3478
    @pseudopulk3478 Год назад +12

    guess my white mom is secretly asian

  • @EMLA_format
    @EMLA_format Год назад

    I’m already on the Asian mom path along with my cousins, all three are junior Olympians , Eagle Scounts, Play piano and are all A’s and above

  • @Hyunjinswife11
    @Hyunjinswife11 Год назад

    Same for African too like we all livin the same life

  • @sadu_418
    @sadu_418 9 месяцев назад

    damn this just described my whole life 😭

  • @Justmenonelse
    @Justmenonelse Год назад +1

    Not only Asians, my mom is a Latina and she does this. My dad doesn’t really care but my mom does 😅

  • @joyzhang7172
    @joyzhang7172 Год назад

    I have Asian parents and I don’t know what I want anymore

  • @saanvikorampalli8056
    @saanvikorampalli8056 Год назад +1

    This is true but not to all Asian families though Brest my parents are letting us kids choose what we want to do and I still have no idea yet lol

  • @ngannguyenphuong7362
    @ngannguyenphuong7362 Год назад

    Watching her to improve my IELTS Speaking band :>>

  • @smolbunzz
    @smolbunzz Год назад

    I love seeing videos like this and how differently we grew up, and sometimes I wish I had parents somewhere to yours. It was great to learn independence at such a young age by choosing what I wanted and when I didn’t like, but if felt like my parents didn’t care because they didn’t believe I could do much. I probably wouldn’t go as far as saying that I want a very controlling parent, but I wish there were a middle ground where I had a parent who gently forced me to do certain things and cared about my education. Now I’m in university, and it feels like no matter what I do, I am not proud of what I do because there’s no support behind it; no one is proud of me because it was my choice. I hope it makes sense. I just wanted a parent who showed that they cared enough to be a guide.

  • @rey8194
    @rey8194 7 месяцев назад

    Its bc most of our asian families come from a migration backgrounf or are middle class thats why our families struggle with money so moms want us to have a more comfortable life for us and our future kids

  • @ayemyalinn
    @ayemyalinn Год назад

    so relatable !!!

  • @kpoppiesworld1599
    @kpoppiesworld1599 Год назад

    The most relatable one tho
    Cause I feel like I'm stuck

  • @eggyolk671
    @eggyolk671 Год назад

    oh yeah that’s damn right cuz at first I really wanted to major in psychology but now i’m just gonna do computer science because my mom wants it and not me :) still making psychology a backup plan tho ✌🏿

  • @kpoopguurl
    @kpoopguurl Год назад

    This is true. I recently just graduated cc and this 11 year old graduated too. He doesn't really look too happy but the mom was.

  • @samonphoeun7865
    @samonphoeun7865 Год назад +1

    It's mostly my dad though

  • @johnpaul663
    @johnpaul663 Год назад +3

    But I want to build a boat with no traintracks and open waters

  • @wuraolakings8553
    @wuraolakings8553 Год назад +1

    It's the same with African moms too

  • @amezcecg888
    @amezcecg888 Год назад +1

    And now i know why ive never known what i wanted in life

  • @ajeykul
    @ajeykul 9 месяцев назад

    Yes. We should look for progress. Not goals.

  • @tokenoflove
    @tokenoflove Год назад +2

    Unpopular opinion - i like the way asians r brought up under supervision, by this way their lives r less fuvked up,..less substance abuse,less abortion, less unwanted pregnancy,.. More carrier oriented childs & more organised life😊 love it this way

    • @Imokayluv
      @Imokayluv Год назад +2

      Same I like that there is more structure and discipline in most Asian families and that there is a goal to strive for

  • @ramsaycobbler8499
    @ramsaycobbler8499 Год назад

    Choooi ash

  • @catlechat7785
    @catlechat7785 Год назад +1

    North African baby and feels relatable

  • @gdesthetic
    @gdesthetic Год назад

    Oh she's talking abt me 🫤🤚

  • @ghenetteweldemedhin43
    @ghenetteweldemedhin43 Год назад +2

    Not only Asian parents 😭

  • @jeaon_kim
    @jeaon_kim Год назад

    TRUE TRUE

  • @sirangwuxian7846
    @sirangwuxian7846 9 месяцев назад

    I dont think its that wrong if you see it from their perspective. They dont want you to make the same mistakes.

  • @rem6552
    @rem6552 Год назад

    That’s why I’m not going to college. Just work and live.

  • @alginc4947
    @alginc4947 Год назад

    💯💯💯

  • @yuna0004
    @yuna0004 Год назад +1

    My mom is asian and she always decided my hobbies and everything. But I actually know what I want, but im to scared to say that, so I just follow her way.
    Its so frustrating.

  • @seungmininthebuildung
    @seungmininthebuildung 9 месяцев назад

    I can feel her my mom even expects me to hate the same people as she does 😭 like kpop etc. Just becaus she doesnt like this kind of music

  • @yenoh-evol2510
    @yenoh-evol2510 Год назад

    It depends on which Asian country you live in and your status...

  • @_chanise
    @_chanise Год назад

    I'm an asian, an indian to be precise but luckily my parents never forced me into things I didn't want to do. my parents would love to see me be a doctor but I wanna do engineering nd they never force me into medical. it makes me feels pretty liberal but they'll never support choices like music or art(iykyk indian parents)

  • @thatsvickiIRL
    @thatsvickiIRL Год назад

    facts

  • @yzzilcafe2314
    @yzzilcafe2314 Год назад

    legit

  • @baebaevip
    @baebaevip Год назад

    Return Of Investment 😂

  • @siddiqa6222
    @siddiqa6222 Год назад +1

    Exactly what's going on in my life 😐

  • @HeyegherVibez
    @HeyegherVibez Год назад

    Afrikan parents/family be on that too...
    Your look, college, degree(s), career, husband/wife, where you'll live (basically next door), kids, everything is decided for you...
    It's not love, it's control...Most of our elders/parents fell for the game and never got to do what they wanted to do or were sent here to do b/c they followed the path that a family member created for them like the elder before them...This just leads to living bicuriously through the kids...
    Nope, I'm not sorry I'm not that doctor/lawyer and decided to work for myself...#HappyBlacksheep

  • @bunnyandkaty
    @bunnyandkaty Год назад

    But I do agree

  • @Haru_o.o
    @Haru_o.o Год назад +1

    How do I send this to my mom?!?!?!?

  • @GlaceonFan32
    @GlaceonFan32 Год назад +1

    Ayo ain't this ma momma 🤣
    She told me to pursue a postgrad, which is a masters
    I'll be graduating with a bachelor's degree soon and honestly? I really just wanna go work in some boring corporate company just so I can live my life paycheck after paycheck.
    But no, she wants me to further my studies because "everyone is a degree holder now, to get better pay you must get a masters."
    She's willing to dig out the $ with my dad to pay for my fees but it was almost experiencing a tough hangover.

  • @75w26__
    @75w26__ 6 месяцев назад

    If u dont know what u want,, at least list everything u dont want at first
    Invert always invert

  • @tatianaukai6389
    @tatianaukai6389 Год назад

    What's this episode?
    This so intresting... i really want watch... but i can't find full ep

  • @isa_1817
    @isa_1817 Год назад

    Most pacific families are the same..

  • @soelemon
    @soelemon Год назад

    My fathers like that and then he blames me for not having an idea of what to do with my life at 16 💀

  • @kuyatotoybibo
    @kuyatotoybibo Год назад

    *nod *nod

  • @Ash-is9ym
    @Ash-is9ym Год назад

    It's similar in Indian culture

  • @user-gv8dv3jf3e
    @user-gv8dv3jf3e Месяц назад

    😮 😮😮😮

  • @fiyah28
    @fiyah28 Год назад

    Especially when you've met ur hubby at like age 5 and u know u can't get out of it once u turn 16
    (Just someone I know)

  • @haripriya8987
    @haripriya8987 Год назад +1

    I'll be that Parent

  • @whatevenisthisacc
    @whatevenisthisacc Год назад

    Hm.

  • @itsjhilmil6819
    @itsjhilmil6819 Год назад

    Who is she?

    • @niniwatches
      @niniwatches Год назад

      ashley choi, former idol and member of ladies' code

  • @nolifedotcom13
    @nolifedotcom13 Год назад

    She isnt wrong tho..

  • @maryallen2317
    @maryallen2317 Год назад

    Too controlling.

  • @ranicks3205
    @ranicks3205 8 месяцев назад

    What can we do?? ... if we let them to be... all they want to be ... mediocre musician.... tattooed and call themselves THEM