Check out the daily upside here! bit.ly/3HeBdUp In keeping with the theme of this video I will be donated the fee I get from them to ‘Sean’s place’ it’s a charity local to me that does great work.
My advice - I’m a very happy 58yr old who will retire soon: 1. Build a balanced life career + friends + hobbies + sports + interests + family + children + marriage 2. Appreciate the free things nature has given us - sea, woods, trails, wildlife, air, rain, wind, body, senses, colours, 3. Save for rainy days/retirement 4. Stay fit & in shape, 5. Always leave toxic work environments/people
4 months in and having been really busy with moving house, helping my kids move houses, holiday etc am now twiddling me thumbs ! Only so much running, squash & biking I can do in a week. Ordered a couple more “retirement” books and putting feelers out for p/t work 🫨
I would say same, this is a great review on happiness! So glad i clicked and watched. I relate to this because someone wanted to borrow money from me and I worried and contemplated for few nights coz its just so dear, and today God said I should be using every bit of opportunity to do charity and love, and so I said yes even if I’m uncertain. I have saved the money and it’s just in the bank, but that moment where the receiver just felt so relieved and thankful that I could be an instrument for them to alleviate their frustration and problems made me realize that I am lucky in so many ways and that made me happy, that moment you mentioned that the act of giving (time or resource) is a key to happiness - it’s weird but it works. Gave me a sense of purpose for a moment. Sorry for this litany and I could go on and on. Lol. But Thank you for caring about happiness and creating this content! 😊
This was such a good video with real practical advice as well as the more philosophical side of things. As a Muslim, charity is a huge part of my faith. In Islam, if you can't afford to give money away you're encouraged to view looking after your family as charity e.g feeding your loved ones. Even smiling at another person is classed as an act of charity. It doesn't cost anything to be kind!
Most people who you hear in media are rather rich. So for them, it doesn't buy happiness, as they have too much of it. IMHO one of the reasons why extremely rich are prone to suicide is the fact they don't have to interact with other people the normal way and create social connections as they can buy almost all they want. When I need the bus driver to stop for me somewhere he doesn't have to, I have to be nice to him and so on. People are social animals.
Yes, I think money can buy happiness, because more money reduces the financial stress, improves the living standards and access to better healthcare. I remember all too well when I was a student, I had a tooth that grew sideways and started to rot, but I had no money to get it removed. For over a year I was dealing with the constant pain of that tooth slowly rotting away. I didn't sleep well and got underweight by losing over 20 pounds because eating was painful. When I finally had the money to get it out, it was such a relief; even when I think of it now, I remember how nice that was. Finally almost no pain and being able to sleep much better. However, while that was about 10 years ago, I still have pain in the jaw from time to time, because a nerve was permanently damaged as well. I definitely learned a lot of it, most importantly that money actually does buy happiness and that people don't give a crap about suffering of others.
As a Christian that doesn't come as a surprise. In our local congregation we help each other - sometimes just buying food for each other if someone is in a rough spot. Seeing the difference in that persons day makes all the difference. Giving makes happier than receiving. And if we do, it's likely going to be reciprocated when you yourself are struggling.
It's worth noting, in a time when giving money may feel challenging for many, that giving time can be every bit as rewarding. I started volunteering at a repair cafe and it's been so satisfying, I've met wonderful people who have become friends and the sense of joy I feel when we fix a visitors treasured item is lasting and satisfying. Use your skills to help others and be kind, I promise you will be rewarded for it.
I've always gotten crap for focusing so much on the past, but where I am now I feel like my tendency to think about my past every single day is a blessing to my happiness. I have PTSD, and get stuck thinking about the traumas of my past and how horrific and miserable it was. But when I come back to reality, I look at my big house and my happy relationship and my disability support and how hard I've worked and how far I've come to build this peaceful life for myself after growing up miserable, and every day my appreciation for what I have is refreshed. I grew up impoverished and am now middle class, and that increase in income drastically improved my happiness, but since I'm often comparing it to where I started it doesn't really get old.
I've been thinking about swapping a subscription like Netflix and replacing it with a monthly Direct Debit to charity. After watching this video, that's exactly what I'm gonna do. Perfect example of great writing, research and delivery. Amazing video, Damo - keep smashing it!
I did this and it’s very short term. It becomes just another line on a spreadsheet. To paraphrase, hedonic adjustment occurred and it didn’t help me. Selfish but there you go. I’ve adjusted and pick a new charity every few months, variance makes all the difference.
@@Yannerson I can't help but think that this such a sad way to view this. If you donate to charity with the sole intention of gaining something out of it, then of course it becomes just another line in a spreadsheet. You should donate to a cause you believe in and to make the world a better place, and sincerely believe that the world can become a better place if each person does something to improve it. You shouldn't donate to charity to be happy, it should be a secondary side effect. You should donate do charity because you sincerely want to do it, not to gain something out of it
@@talete7712 I agree whole heartedly. But I could choose for the transaction to mean something or potentially not do it at all. I’ve really enjoyed finding new causes to support that don’t necessarily gain main stream attention and I hope it helps them a little.
I recently entered the legal profession in family law, and my job has made me so thankful for my husband and little family we have made. So thankful for the peace we have, even if materially we don’t have much. I’ve already seen and heard horrific stories that leave me on the verge of tears. It baffles me how truly priceless kindness can be and yet it seems to be lacking throughout too many people.
It wasn't until I had a disk hernia that needed spinal surgery and almost cost me the ability to walk that I truly became grateful and happy just to be able to walk and move freely each day. Really interesting ideas in this video, thanks.
Thanks very much as this is an eye opener. Lost my dad last year and he was not a rich man but enjoyed helping others and this gave him a real buzz. I do similar - I grow loads of veg and fruit and just charge my costs, this gives people value for money and I really enjoy the helping people out . Again thanks for the insight and I think you are generally right, Cheers Nick
I really appreciate how you don't cut at the end of sentence and just monologue. The pauses instead of the cuts makes it feel more genuine and not just another produced video
When I bought my first car it was great. When I bought my 70 year old dad a car because I was doing OK in life it felt amazing, and it still does years later. Even watching this video and writing this comment reminded me of it. Thank you for paying a dividend Damien :-)
I watch this on a regular basis. It reminds me that when I make choices that I hope will make me happy and the world tells me that it won't.... Trust myself. Thank you. Truly, thank you.
SO much to unpack in this video - what a spectacular production! You just keep on giving Damien! Some truly important lessons here, backed by academic papers no less, presented in such an approachable and relatable way. There's no value that can be placed on content like this 🙂
Caring for my belongings helps too. If I’m tired of my car, I do a full detail on it. It helps. I only care for things in that way because I value them.
This is your best video yet. Well done mate, this was extremely good and I think it will really speak volume to a lot of your subscribers. Top notch content. Thanks for making this.
I think the biggest problem right now, is people are either struggling to pay a mortgage and bills, or cant save enough to keep up with rising house prices, to just have a place to live. I'd love to spend my money on other things, but that option just isnt available to most anymore. I have a deposit bigger than what my parents 3 bed home cost 30 years ago, yet I cant afford a small freehold with a maxed mortgage. I have more money now than ever, and can afford to do/have less.
You smashed it with this video Damo. I can’t imagine the hours of research and work that went it to this, but it’s worth it. I specifically loved the hedonic adaptation depiction of a couple weeks at an all inclusive in JA loool
When I had my first job I splashed out on new tech, new phones etc that was a total waste. I can’t go back in time but what I try and do now is think of money as not to be exchanged for things you want unless you really need a new device like a laptop for work and is absolutely needed. Instead I try and love more a frugal life style and try and use my money to make more money in higher rate interest accounts or invest in stocks like ETFs or invest the money into my own creative business pursuits like making my own films and doing marketing campaigns. I don’t have fancy clothes and new tech anymore but I do feel the mindset is helping me see what is necessary and getting more value out of what I currently have. I buy all my clothes second hand now and have so many that are practically unworn and given away. A lot of wasteful mindset
i think another thing beyond experiences are hobbies, especially ones where you create things e.g music, woodworking, project car. a lot of jobs nowadays place you so far removed from seeing your work bring something to fruition (the most anyone sees are meaningless numbers go up), and that removes any kind of fulfilment from that. whittling down a stick into a knife is something where you see the direct result of your hard work, making the act of creating it a lot more fulfilling. you can also see yourself building on the skill; maybe a year or 2 later you can carve out a whole chest- these are things that are tangible to you, not the profits seen on a spreadsheet of a company you care little for
I wonder how many peoples days you have made a little bit brighter just by them testing this out and engaging in the act of giving. Even if only a fifth of the people who watched do, that’s a good amount. Good work Damo 👍
Working as a care assistant has made me value the ability to walk around without needing assistance which seems so simple but it really is something to appreciate if you have that ability.
Great video! I've always chosen to invest in experiences and knowledge more than ''stuff''. Also, in the pursuit of happiness, people forget to count their blessings and appreciate what they have now.
I'm quite happy when I give my 19 year old car a few upgrades I don't need to upgrade the entire thing, In 10 years time it could be worth more than something you buy new today . . . Some people struggle to be content.
I've never really liked buying things or spending alot on big holidays alone. I've always preferred smaller more frequent events with friends which is why I make an effort to go out every week and just spend time with people
Money can absolutely buy happiness. Skiing, the Alps, and lots of snow and snow makes me sooo happy, a special kind of happy, and I can't go without money.
As always a truly reflective view on life and happiness. I am on a similar journey and with a small mind shift looking at what you have and where you are is amazing. 4 years ago while happy and married with a home we didn't have a garden. Now while my grass is 90% moss it's my moss and I cut it lol. Looking at what you have changes how you look at want you want,do you really need it. We have down scaled our wants and of course this saves you money so it's a win win..... Thanks again and enjoy your journey too....
This really resonates with me, after years of stressing on how much I am saving, I've change my view to enjoying spending some money on experiences and being with friends 👍
I agree money doesn’t make you happy, but it certainly allows you options, which definitely lowers stress. When i was younger I didn’t have much money, i was probably as happy though as i had more friends and time. Now today I have a small business and so much more- it comes with its own stress but its not the same level of stress, its stress from good problems because i got so much more options. When i was 20 my option was spend money to eat or do anything else, and not eat. As for being happier, im not sure i am any happier but i do try to remember to count my blessings everyday.
Hi Damien, this maybe relevant or not, but there is a line from a James song from years ago that has stuck with me since then " If i Hadn't seen such riches i could live with being poor" we are all born into this, but some are able to move out of it. I was on this wheel for most of my working life, but now retired i realise that what i have is quite satisfactory and am trying to appreciate it. But is it not easy.
at 57 I am saving, investing and working hard, this so easily becomes an obsession, I guess I am looking for some sort of security in this world and the ability to provide for children/grandchildren, but my main happiness comes through my eternal security in JESUS.
I remember when I tried to move to Vancouver from the UK, when I arrived they cancelled all the visas and I couldn’t work. So I turned it into a holiday, I was there with my brother and we went on a road trip and went to restaurants. We got drunk and I blew $200 on a steak. The money I completely don’t care about, I wouldn’t want it back because I got far more fun out of it. But it wasn’t the money that made it fun, it was being with my brother having fun and being free. Every time I look back on those memories I laugh and smile. One very funny memory was me and my brother were bickering over whether to stay at a hostel or a slightly more expensive motel. In the end, I caved in and agreed to go into a hostel. The irony was the hostel was cheaper but the car park across from it charged every 3 hours max so he had to get up every 3 hours to fill the meter. Meanwhile, I slept soundly. I just found that so funny because he was thought by going cheap he would save money but in the end staying there cost more than if we went to the motel. The next day, we stayed at a motel and for the slight extra expense it was a lot easier. I’m not saying more money means happier memories, what counts is the experience. Money is just a tool, an instrument, to get there but you don’t need much to have it. I spent more than would’ve been needed for me to have a good time. Our most joyful moments didn’t need money at all, we were just happy living in the moment
I really enjoyed this video Damien! I bought a house last year and I think for me it very much felt like the ‘what now…?’ Feeling was quite strong. This year I’ve committed do doing more but spending less, walking in the Peaks over waiting for the asos sale. Thank you for bringing to attention Hedonic adjustment, I’m really glad that my happiness is invested in experiences over stuff
What an outstanding video Damien … one one the best I’ve ever seen on RUclips … fantastic subject matter and coming from a genuine lad …. Time for me to book a £70 flight somewhere 😊
Your best video yet. Bam 100% spot on, never felt so connected than this one. I started buying some small trees each month and take them over the local nature reserve to plant with my son. I get so much pleasure out of doing this each month and watching our little patch grow. My son also looks forward to the end of each month when we get to do this that we get that hit when they turn up in the post for planting. That costs me £13 a month, far less than the £150 nice treat meal out that we might enjoy for a couple of hours!
I'm like that rat ever since I subbed to your channel mate - I'm addicted to the anticipation of a new content made by you that I know will not disappoint
How have I only just found this video of yours? This video is incredible and the content and way its portrayed is exceptional. A great video with a very important message and one of the best I've watched on RUclips.
Hey Damien, love you channel. Doctor here, I remember doing some training on drugs and alcohol addiction some years back. My take home learning was that it takes 3 months for dopamine receptors in your brains to desensitise to an addiction, after that further time is required to recover and stay away. The first 3 months are therefore the hardest. Taking reels and short videos as an example on Instagram, they work by giving you 3-5 second dopamine hits, you keep scrolling and keep getting those hits. I think there's a lot of these dopamine hits that provide "fake" happiness in our daily lives. Therefore, other more important things like spending time with you family become sadly mundane and less enjoyable. This can be applied to spending , the new or better version of something you already have for example. It's a good foundation of to have, you know if you can stay away from something for 3 months (something that in the long term has negative impact) you've done incredibly well on your road to recovery - or put another way - you are buying into cheap short lived dopamine hits that take you away from what's more important in life. Keep up the good work.
Excellent video, I've certainly taken some ideas away to think about. Amazing to think how much the Stoics got right two thousand years ago. Important point that you made is happiness isn't a destination, we have to work at it every day.
in the end your graph shows that even if you try or dont. Happiness is mostly the same level. But if you try to be happy. You will focus on unhappy times. So best way to be fulfilled is to fo hard stuff and gorw as person. Yeah it sucks to go for run every day. But it will make oyu proud and stronger.
Wow. Thanks for putting it together in the context of happiness. The things I took away were: - you adjust to things I.e. hedonic adjustment so be aware of that - add variations to existing things to keep experiencing joy - seek small experiences as well and book them with family/friends so you can enjoy time with them. Basically do things together. - good memories can also re-trigger the joy - comparing yourself or your items to others can rid you of joy so think of your experiences instead - give to charity but try to connect with people you are helping.
Another absolute blinder of a video. I found myself thinking ‘I wonder if Martin Lewis started like this….?’ I hope someone with influence notices you soon and introduces you to an even wider audience. Your expertise, humour, media skills and what you have to say are all of enormous value.
It all made much sense. But the epiphany was the closing song. It was the soundtrack of the greatest time of my life as an Erasmus student in Norway a decade ago. Money well spent.
I think this is true. Whenever I need to feel better, I think back to my first night in my new house. I hated the wall paper, there was a lawnmower in the corner of my living room, my sofa was my parents old one that had been sat in the garage for almost 5 years because no one had bothered to take it to the tip, and my coffee table was the upturned cardboard box the steamer I had bought to take the wallpaper off the walls the next day came in. After a full day of unpacking, arranging the kitchen, back and forth to mum and dads collecting my things, I was totally exhausted and I just crashed back on the sofa with a beer. What came over me was the most unadulterated and perfect sensation of both pleasure and satisfaction I have ever felt in my entire life. Sure, this place had its faults and I was going to need to redecorate the whole thing from top to bottom, but it was mine! Whenever I think back to that moment almost 4 years ago now, the feeling comes right back.
What a tremendous and brave video. Your best. As a MH practitioner, I am looking at some of these elements in my working practice. Massive respect to you Sir.
Amazing video, extreamly well made :) It resinanted with me, a lot has changed for me over the last two years and I realised I'd been doing a lot of these things, which I guess is in part as to why I'm so much happier! I've also started to declutter and sell/dontate things that don't make me happy and put money aside for quality items that will give me more long term happiness.
Basically, what ive learned on my own: ignore what others do. Do what makes you happy. Lifes about the little things, not the big issues. I cut myself off from social media and news outlets to improve my personal outlook, and took up creative writIng, photography, and started listening to music a lot more. I still struggle financially, but thats only because i'm on disability. I am in the process of job hunting and have been for the last 5 years to no avail. I have learned to find happiness in what i have, and learn better ways if expeessing myself through art instead of being a sarcastic twat😂 which i still totally am lol, but less because im actually upset at life, and more because its fun 😅. I know my comment isnt exactly relevant with immediate message in this video, it aligns with the overall message regardless. We are social creatures by nature, we find happiness in experiences and being around people we enjoy the company of. money plays a role to a certain extent, but its not the be all end all for happiness.
I'm a huge advocate for the benefits of climbing (with a friend or a partner). It can also be done very cheaply - bouldering with a £60 pair of shoes and £10 worth of chalk and a chalk bag (eBay is your friend here). It's one of the best sports/activities for improving you both physically and mentally, and when combined with a relationship, either friendship or romantic, it can make that stronger also. Money definitely can buy you happiness, but it can also buy you a pair of climbing shoes, and that's a fun and easy way to get to the same place.
The nostalgia part is interesting - I consider myself nostalgic, and I struggle with juggling between being happy remembering those events and also lamenting that things have changed and that I feel less happy in the moment. I'm sure I'm not the only one, and I probably need to do a better job of appreciating that I had those experiences rather than regretting that things arent quite like that any more
Loved the topic of this one and congrats on the podcast! Giving to others, whether that's our money or out time is something we could all do more of, myself included!
Awesome video, thank you! I've always been told by people with both more and less money than me that more money won't make me happier. I always say "I'll tell you when it stops making me happier then". I think people just suck at using it to make themselves happier. Great advice on how to do so in this vid.
no problem you have in life will be worse because you have money. there is nothing wrong inherently with building a bank account, building wealth, literally every problem you encounter in life will be easier if you have money to get you through it. everybody would be better off by developing ways of earning money. you HAVE to do something in life, so why not do lucrative things. ETHICALLY
Appreciation can only bring happiness when there are things around you that you genuinely can reflect on and be appreciative for. This is just not the case when say a family member dies tragically, or a loved one leaves you or a natural disaster/war displaces you from your home. There’s no space for appreciation other than suffering, grief and depression. And these events can cause a lasting impact on your life for many, many years. It’s a privilege to be able to look back and see life progress in 12 months, and I’m saying this as someone who’s lived through bucketloads of trauma and is finally seeing improvements in my life.
i love giving away, where i live we have a pretty bad drug/alcohol/homelessness problem. plus a lot of my relatives are amongst them. i love the feeling of helping someone’s day in a little way cause it will go a long way for them. for me it’s 5 dollars but to them it’s a day where they don’t have to worry. if it’s an extreme temp i’ll give them water, or feet/hand warmers. it’s so easy to do. i hate how hard it is for ppl to do, ppl have so many hang ups when giving away here. “what if they spend it on alcohol or drugs” idc if they do tbh, sometimes they need it. alcohol is a pretty bad thing to cold turkey (seizures). so what if i this 5 dollars i give them prevents that. i’ve been down low before so i can understand how someone can get in that position.
This was a phenomenal video. My favourite of yours yet. It was important, applicable, clear, relevant, and well produced. Please do more like this 🙏 well done! 🙌
Lifestyle creep is so real. The best advice I ever got was that even if I got a promotion at work or got a raise is to not let that get my head and still live as if I’m making a beginner salary. Not to say that you should deprive yourself but cutting out unnecessary and extravagant purchases is very important.
Damien as a spokesmen for Big Air fryer, I have had my air fryer for just over a year and I still love it and is a genuine source of happiness with every wedge I make. All hail the drawer of wedges
I’m in a very fortunate position that I’m 50 and paid off mortgages on homes in England and Scotland which we live between. But by doing that I’ve lost my motivation a bit. I want to retire early so paying into that more but I’m thinking about saving and buying a home in Spain as well just to give me a renewed focus in life and goal. Then the idea is the family can live between the 3 when I retire. But on the other hand I could use the money to go on holidays with family to different places. And I have to say, paying off the mortgages was an anti climax. I did it to feel more secure financially (and I have a distrust of banks so wanted to rid myself of them) but strangely I don’t seem to be able to shake off money worries even if I don’t have any. The happiness graphs probably apply.
Another great video and very true, I experience this when I got rid of my company car and bought an old version golf estate was difficult at first but now surprisingly I love my 10 year old golf as I feel more humbled
On a related note, i listened to your first podcast, i loved it. Your guest was very down to earth, had no airs and graces, which was perfect for me. Also she didnt mind the odd expletive :)
Best video yet, and that's saying something. Full of brilliant takeaways that I and a lot of others needed to hear. It's nice to see the meme clips stitched in again. LOLed at the "satisfaction" dub.
This is such a great video, you briefly mentioned stoicism and you could've definitely gone down that rabbit hole as this video can be easily summed up as learn about stocisim
Brilliant different video, I will try and watch this a few times over coming weeks, it's so true things get old very quick and you should be happy with what you already have and appreciate it more ❤ and also totally agree its good to save for future but there is a happy medium you have to try enjoy some of your money to be happy and do the things you want to do 😊
I’ve watched a lot of your videos & never commented but I have to say I laughed so hard through this, fantastic editing & clips. A LOT of effort went into making this look so smooth & it’s really good 👍🏾
Great video Damo. It's not all about saving as much money as possible for the future, it's about enjoying life with variety and experiences. This has definitely changed my perspective on happiness.
I inherited a fair bit of money. I own property and ive traveled the world. I couldnt handle going from having nothing to a fair bit. I got ideas above my station. Ripped out the heart of the girl of my dreams who worshipped me. I was happier struggling, id give it all to that girl. I would give her the lot i don't want it. I want her
I think most people go through heart break and coming to terms with the fact you messed it up is part of growing as a man. Instead of dwelling on it like you are, improve yourself and when the next girl who comes along who worships you then you are ready.
Check out the daily upside here!
bit.ly/3HeBdUp
In keeping with the theme of this video I will be donated the fee I get from them to ‘Sean’s place’ it’s a charity local to me that does great work.
My advice - I’m a very happy 58yr old who will retire soon: 1. Build a balanced life career + friends + hobbies + sports + interests + family + children + marriage 2. Appreciate the free things nature has given us - sea, woods, trails, wildlife, air, rain, wind, body, senses, colours, 3. Save for rainy days/retirement 4. Stay fit & in shape, 5. Always leave toxic work environments/people
I like your outlook, and hope you enjoy your retirement. Thanks for the good advice 🙏
Thanks for sharing this!
Props to you, i couldn’t retire at 58.
4 months in and having been really busy with moving house, helping my kids move houses, holiday etc am now twiddling me thumbs ! Only so much running, squash & biking I can do in a week. Ordered a couple more “retirement” books and putting feelers out for p/t work 🫨
❤
You should be so unbelievably proud of this video. Content, production, message. Thank you for putting this into the world.
Thank you so much Grant. Lovely comment and i am glad you enjoyed the video
Could not agree more
Absolutely. I was going to comment something similar but this says it perfectly. Bloody brilliant. 👏
I would say same, this is a great review on happiness! So glad i clicked and watched. I relate to this because someone wanted to borrow money from me and I worried and contemplated for few nights coz its just so dear, and today God said I should be using every bit of opportunity to do charity and love, and so I said yes even if I’m uncertain. I have saved the money and it’s just in the bank, but that moment where the receiver just felt so relieved and thankful that I could be an instrument for them to alleviate their frustration and problems made me realize that I am lucky in so many ways and that made me happy, that moment you mentioned that the act of giving (time or resource) is a key to happiness - it’s weird but it works. Gave me a sense of purpose for a moment. Sorry for this litany and I could go on and on. Lol. But Thank you for caring about happiness and creating this content! 😊
Absolutely!
This was such a good video with real practical advice as well as the more philosophical side of things. As a Muslim, charity is a huge part of my faith. In Islam, if you can't afford to give money away you're encouraged to view looking after your family as charity e.g feeding your loved ones. Even smiling at another person is classed as an act of charity. It doesn't cost anything to be kind!
Smiling at someone is charity! What a lovely sentiment and way to go about the world that is
thats become a big issue. the selfishness of 'family over community'
@@PazLeBonno it isn’t.
@@PazLeBon take off your pink glasses
This video is S tier. It’s the kind of life advice people used to get in Church. You are truly doing the Lord’s work. Bless you my son.
Thank you
"Rich people tell you money can't buy happiness, so you remain poor in your delusion", that's what my mentor told me.
Your mentor is right.
Money can’t buy happiness but not having enough of it buys misery for sure.
Your mentor was a fool and so are you.
Oh, yet another useless quote about wealth
Most people who you hear in media are rather rich. So for them, it doesn't buy happiness, as they have too much of it. IMHO one of the reasons why extremely rich are prone to suicide is the fact they don't have to interact with other people the normal way and create social connections as they can buy almost all they want. When I need the bus driver to stop for me somewhere he doesn't have to, I have to be nice to him and so on. People are social animals.
Yes, I think money can buy happiness, because more money reduces the financial stress, improves the living standards and access to better healthcare.
I remember all too well when I was a student, I had a tooth that grew sideways and started to rot, but I had no money to get it removed.
For over a year I was dealing with the constant pain of that tooth slowly rotting away.
I didn't sleep well and got underweight by losing over 20 pounds because eating was painful.
When I finally had the money to get it out, it was such a relief; even when I think of it now, I remember how nice that was.
Finally almost no pain and being able to sleep much better.
However, while that was about 10 years ago, I still have pain in the jaw from time to time, because a nerve was permanently damaged as well.
I definitely learned a lot of it, most importantly that money actually does buy happiness and that people don't give a crap about suffering of others.
As a Christian that doesn't come as a surprise. In our local congregation we help each other - sometimes just buying food for each other if someone is in a rough spot. Seeing the difference in that persons day makes all the difference. Giving makes happier than receiving. And if we do, it's likely going to be reciprocated when you yourself are struggling.
It's worth noting, in a time when giving money may feel challenging for many, that giving time can be every bit as rewarding. I started volunteering at a repair cafe and it's been so satisfying, I've met wonderful people who have become friends and the sense of joy I feel when we fix a visitors treasured item is lasting and satisfying. Use your skills to help others and be kind, I promise you will be rewarded for it.
This is a great point. Volunteering benefits everyone.
I've always gotten crap for focusing so much on the past, but where I am now I feel like my tendency to think about my past every single day is a blessing to my happiness. I have PTSD, and get stuck thinking about the traumas of my past and how horrific and miserable it was. But when I come back to reality, I look at my big house and my happy relationship and my disability support and how hard I've worked and how far I've come to build this peaceful life for myself after growing up miserable, and every day my appreciation for what I have is refreshed. I grew up impoverished and am now middle class, and that increase in income drastically improved my happiness, but since I'm often comparing it to where I started it doesn't really get old.
Smart 😊
I've been thinking about swapping a subscription like Netflix and replacing it with a monthly Direct Debit to charity. After watching this video, that's exactly what I'm gonna do. Perfect example of great writing, research and delivery. Amazing video, Damo - keep smashing it!
This sounds like an awesome idea!
I'd be careful donating to big corporate charities. I've seen first hand the sheer waste within them. Go small and local if you're going to donate.
I did this and it’s very short term. It becomes just another line on a spreadsheet. To paraphrase, hedonic adjustment occurred and it didn’t help me. Selfish but there you go. I’ve adjusted and pick a new charity every few months, variance makes all the difference.
@@Yannerson I can't help but think that this such a sad way to view this. If you donate to charity with the sole intention of gaining something out of it, then of course it becomes just another line in a spreadsheet. You should donate to a cause you believe in and to make the world a better place, and sincerely believe that the world can become a better place if each person does something to improve it. You shouldn't donate to charity to be happy, it should be a secondary side effect. You should donate do charity because you sincerely want to do it, not to gain something out of it
@@talete7712 I agree whole heartedly. But I could choose for the transaction to mean something or potentially not do it at all. I’ve really enjoyed finding new causes to support that don’t necessarily gain main stream attention and I hope it helps them a little.
I recently entered the legal profession in family law, and my job has made me so thankful for my husband and little family we have made. So thankful for the peace we have, even if materially we don’t have much. I’ve already seen and heard horrific stories that leave me on the verge of tears. It baffles me how truly priceless kindness can be and yet it seems to be lacking throughout too many people.
It wasn't until I had a disk hernia that needed spinal surgery and almost cost me the ability to walk that I truly became grateful and happy just to be able to walk and move freely each day. Really interesting ideas in this video, thanks.
Thanks very much as this is an eye opener. Lost my dad last year and he was not a rich man but enjoyed helping others and this gave him a real buzz. I do similar - I grow loads of veg and fruit and just charge my costs, this gives people value for money and I really enjoy the helping people out . Again thanks for the insight and I think you are generally right, Cheers Nick
I really appreciate how you don't cut at the end of sentence and just monologue. The pauses instead of the cuts makes it feel more genuine and not just another produced video
When I bought my first car it was great. When I bought my 70 year old dad a car because I was doing OK in life it felt amazing, and it still does years later. Even watching this video and writing this comment reminded me of it. Thank you for paying a dividend Damien :-)
I watch this on a regular basis. It reminds me that when I make choices that I hope will make me happy and the world tells me that it won't.... Trust myself. Thank you. Truly, thank you.
SO much to unpack in this video - what a spectacular production! You just keep on giving Damien! Some truly important lessons here, backed by academic papers no less, presented in such an approachable and relatable way. There's no value that can be placed on content like this 🙂
2:29 Another thing I love about your channel are all the little musical references. It's a millennial music mystery tour.
Yes! Glad you enjoy them I had some fun with this one haha. Risked getting strikes just to get the references in
Beautifully nuanced video here Damo, an absolute pleasure to watch. Thanks for taking the time to put this together xx
Caring for my belongings helps too. If I’m tired of my car, I do a full detail on it. It helps. I only care for things in that way because I value them.
This is your best video yet. Well done mate, this was extremely good and I think it will really speak volume to a lot of your subscribers. Top notch content. Thanks for making this.
I think the biggest problem right now, is people are either struggling to pay a mortgage and bills, or cant save enough to keep up with rising house prices, to just have a place to live.
I'd love to spend my money on other things, but that option just isnt available to most anymore. I have a deposit bigger than what my parents 3 bed home cost 30 years ago, yet I cant afford a small freehold with a maxed mortgage.
I have more money now than ever, and can afford to do/have less.
You smashed it with this video Damo. I can’t imagine the hours of research and work that went it to this, but it’s worth it. I specifically loved the hedonic adaptation depiction of a couple weeks at an all inclusive in JA loool
Yes! Haha I couldn’t stop laughing at that clip 🤣
I work in a Foodbank and get far more from giving than receiving, one of the best videos on RUclips,thank you .
When I had my first job I splashed out on new tech, new phones etc that was a total waste. I can’t go back in time but what I try and do now is think of money as not to be exchanged for things you want unless you really need a new device like a laptop for work and is absolutely needed. Instead I try and love more a frugal life style and try and use my money to make more money in higher rate interest accounts or invest in stocks like ETFs or invest the money into my own creative business pursuits like making my own films and doing marketing campaigns. I don’t have fancy clothes and new tech anymore but I do feel the mindset is helping me see what is necessary and getting more value out of what I currently have. I buy all my clothes second hand now and have so many that are practically unworn and given away. A lot of wasteful mindset
i think another thing beyond experiences are hobbies, especially ones where you create things e.g music, woodworking, project car. a lot of jobs nowadays place you so far removed from seeing your work bring something to fruition (the most anyone sees are meaningless numbers go up), and that removes any kind of fulfilment from that. whittling down a stick into a knife is something where you see the direct result of your hard work, making the act of creating it a lot more fulfilling. you can also see yourself building on the skill; maybe a year or 2 later you can carve out a whole chest- these are things that are tangible to you, not the profits seen on a spreadsheet of a company you care little for
I wonder how many peoples days you have made a little bit brighter just by them testing this out and engaging in the act of giving. Even if only a fifth of the people who watched do, that’s a good amount.
Good work Damo 👍
Working as a care assistant has made me value the ability to walk around without needing assistance which seems so simple but it really is something to appreciate if you have that ability.
Thank you for the work you do 💕
Great video! I've always chosen to invest in experiences and knowledge more than ''stuff''. Also, in the pursuit of happiness, people forget to count their blessings and appreciate what they have now.
I'm quite happy when I give my 19 year old car a few upgrades I don't need to upgrade the entire thing,
In 10 years time it could be worth more than something you buy new today . . .
Some people struggle to be content.
I've never really liked buying things or spending alot on big holidays alone. I've always preferred smaller more frequent events with friends which is why I make an effort to go out every week and just spend time with people
I love how he gave up on stoping the copyright and just gave in at the end very inspiring
Money can absolutely buy happiness. Skiing, the Alps, and lots of snow and snow makes me sooo happy, a special kind of happy, and I can't go without money.
As always a truly reflective view on life and happiness. I am on a similar journey and with a small mind shift looking at what you have and where you are is amazing. 4 years ago while happy and married with a home we didn't have a garden. Now while my grass is 90% moss it's my moss and I cut it lol. Looking at what you have changes how you look at want you want,do you really need it. We have down scaled our wants and of course this saves you money so it's a win win..... Thanks again and enjoy your journey too....
This really resonates with me, after years of stressing on how much I am saving, I've change my view to enjoying spending some money on experiences and being with friends 👍
I agree money doesn’t make you happy, but it certainly allows you options, which definitely lowers stress. When i was younger I didn’t have much money, i was probably as happy though as i had more friends and time. Now today I have a small business and so much more- it comes with its own stress but its not the same level of stress, its stress from good problems because i got so much more options. When i was 20 my option was spend money to eat or do anything else, and not eat. As for being happier, im not sure i am any happier but i do try to remember to count my blessings everyday.
Hi Damien, this maybe relevant or not, but there is a line from a James song from years ago that has stuck with me since then " If i Hadn't seen such riches i could live with being poor"
we are all born into this, but some are able to move out of it. I was on this wheel for most of my working life, but now retired i realise that what i have is quite satisfactory and am trying to appreciate it. But is it not easy.
at 57 I am saving, investing and working hard, this so easily becomes an obsession, I guess I am looking for some sort of security in this world and the ability to provide for children/grandchildren, but my main happiness comes through my eternal security in JESUS.
I remember when I tried to move to Vancouver from the UK, when I arrived they cancelled all the visas and I couldn’t work. So I turned it into a holiday, I was there with my brother and we went on a road trip and went to restaurants. We got drunk and I blew $200 on a steak.
The money I completely don’t care about, I wouldn’t want it back because I got far more fun out of it. But it wasn’t the money that made it fun, it was being with my brother having fun and being free. Every time I look back on those memories I laugh and smile.
One very funny memory was me and my brother were bickering over whether to stay at a hostel or a slightly more expensive motel.
In the end, I caved in and agreed to go into a hostel. The irony was the hostel was cheaper but the car park across from it charged every 3 hours max so he had to get up every 3 hours to fill the meter. Meanwhile, I slept soundly. I just found that so funny because he was thought by going cheap he would save money but in the end staying there cost more than if we went to the motel. The next day, we stayed at a motel and for the slight extra expense it was a lot easier.
I’m not saying more money means happier memories, what counts is the experience. Money is just a tool, an instrument, to get there but you don’t need much to have it. I spent more than would’ve been needed for me to have a good time. Our most joyful moments didn’t need money at all, we were just happy living in the moment
I really enjoyed this video Damien! I bought a house last year and I think for me it very much felt like the ‘what now…?’ Feeling was quite strong. This year I’ve committed do doing more but spending less, walking in the Peaks over waiting for the asos sale. Thank you for bringing to attention Hedonic adjustment, I’m really glad that my happiness is invested in experiences over stuff
What an outstanding video Damien … one one the best I’ve ever seen on RUclips … fantastic subject matter and coming from a genuine lad …. Time for me to book a £70 flight somewhere 😊
Your best video yet. Bam 100% spot on, never felt so connected than this one. I started buying some small trees each month and take them over the local nature reserve to plant with my son. I get so much pleasure out of doing this each month and watching our little patch grow. My son also looks forward to the end of each month when we get to do this that we get that hit when they turn up in the post for planting. That costs me £13 a month, far less than the £150 nice treat meal out that we might enjoy for a couple of hours!
I'm like that rat ever since I subbed to your channel mate - I'm addicted to the anticipation of a new content made by you that I know will not disappoint
This is a brilliant comment!
How have I only just found this video of yours? This video is incredible and the content and way its portrayed is exceptional. A great video with a very important message and one of the best I've watched on RUclips.
Hey Damien, love you channel. Doctor here, I remember doing some training on drugs and alcohol addiction some years back. My take home learning was that it takes 3 months for dopamine receptors in your brains to desensitise to an addiction, after that further time is required to recover and stay away. The first 3 months are therefore the hardest.
Taking reels and short videos as an example on Instagram, they work by giving you 3-5 second dopamine hits, you keep scrolling and keep getting those hits. I think there's a lot of these dopamine hits that provide "fake" happiness in our daily lives. Therefore, other more important things like spending time with you family become sadly mundane and less enjoyable. This can be applied to spending , the new or better version of something you already have for example.
It's a good foundation of to have, you know if you can stay away from something for 3 months (something that in the long term has negative impact) you've done incredibly well on your road to recovery - or put another way - you are buying into cheap short lived dopamine hits that take you away from what's more important in life.
Keep up the good work.
Love the fact that you're citing papers, it increases your credibility. Thanks for the great video!
New to your channel, but wanted to say this was excellent, well crafted, and authentically delivered. Kudos.
Thank you! Also welcome to the channel
Excellent video, I've certainly taken some ideas away to think about.
Amazing to think how much the Stoics got right two thousand years ago. Important point that you made is happiness isn't a destination, we have to work at it every day.
I get way sadder when I think back in nostalgia, just want to go back to those times. In no way do I feel better
in the end your graph shows that even if you try or dont. Happiness is mostly the same level. But if you try to be happy. You will focus on unhappy times.
So best way to be fulfilled is to fo hard stuff and gorw as person. Yeah it sucks to go for run every day. But it will make oyu proud and stronger.
Mate, why don't you have more subs! Your delivery and content is great. Good editing too!
Money can't buy happines, but it does buy a facsimile which is indistinguishable from the real thing, cheers!!
Wow. Thanks for putting it together in the context of happiness. The things I took away were:
- you adjust to things I.e. hedonic adjustment so be aware of that
- add variations to existing things to keep experiencing joy
- seek small experiences as well and book them with family/friends so you can enjoy time with them. Basically do things together.
- good memories can also re-trigger the joy
- comparing yourself or your items to others can rid you of joy so think of your experiences instead
- give to charity but try to connect with people you are helping.
Excellent takeaways and a lovely summary of the video for others to read thank you.
I see what you did there with the cat on screen during the ad read. Must be the only ad I haven’t skipped. 😂
🤣🤣🤣
Another absolute blinder of a video. I found myself thinking ‘I wonder if Martin Lewis started like this….?’ I hope someone with influence notices you soon and introduces you to an even wider audience. Your expertise, humour, media skills and what you have to say are all of enormous value.
Thank you so much! Lovely comment this. I hope someone notices me to haha!
It all made much sense. But the epiphany was the closing song. It was the soundtrack of the greatest time of my life as an Erasmus student in Norway a decade ago. Money well spent.
I’m constantly striving for the next job, pay rise or bonus. Very enlightening.
I think this is true. Whenever I need to feel better, I think back to my first night in my new house.
I hated the wall paper, there was a lawnmower in the corner of my living room, my sofa was my parents old one that had been sat in the garage for almost 5 years because no one had bothered to take it to the tip, and my coffee table was the upturned cardboard box the steamer I had bought to take the wallpaper off the walls the next day came in.
After a full day of unpacking, arranging the kitchen, back and forth to mum and dads collecting my things, I was totally exhausted and I just crashed back on the sofa with a beer.
What came over me was the most unadulterated and perfect sensation of both pleasure and satisfaction I have ever felt in my entire life. Sure, this place had its faults and I was going to need to redecorate the whole thing from top to bottom, but it was mine!
Whenever I think back to that moment almost 4 years ago now, the feeling comes right back.
has made me feel a whole lot more positive on this Monday morning, we really dont appreciate what we have!
Have a great week Simon!
Quality! The evidence based nature of your videos is refreshing to see
Thank you Thomas! There is so much interesting research out there it surprises me lots of people don't use it
This comment will be probably get lost, but can I just say this sort of content is absolutely amazing? I've rewatched it more than 5 times.Thank you!
Not lost at all! Thank you so much for watching the video
What a tremendous and brave video. Your best. As a MH practitioner, I am looking at some of these elements in my working practice. Massive respect to you Sir.
Thank you!
I watched half the Huberman Lab episodes and I never succeded in getting a clear picture of the reward prediction error idea before today. Kudos!
Another great video. One of the things that really changed my happiness levels, was learning to stop procrastinating
TEACH ME HOW!!!! I procrastinate so much.
@@DamienTalksMoney Insight Timer App it is Free, Let Go Of Procastination by Kenneth Soares I think he is also on RUclips so might be on here too
Absolute masterpiece of media! Kid kudi tie in finisher was so cool!!
Amazing video, extreamly well made :) It resinanted with me, a lot has changed for me over the last two years and I realised I'd been doing a lot of these things, which I guess is in part as to why I'm so much happier!
I've also started to declutter and sell/dontate things that don't make me happy and put money aside for quality items that will give me more long term happiness.
Basically, what ive learned on my own: ignore what others do. Do what makes you happy. Lifes about the little things, not the big issues. I cut myself off from social media and news outlets to improve my personal outlook, and took up creative writIng, photography, and started listening to music a lot more. I still struggle financially, but thats only because i'm on disability. I am in the process of job hunting and have been for the last 5 years to no avail. I have learned to find happiness in what i have, and learn better ways if expeessing myself through art instead of being a sarcastic twat😂 which i still totally am lol, but less because im actually upset at life, and more because its fun 😅.
I know my comment isnt exactly relevant with immediate message in this video, it aligns with the overall message regardless.
We are social creatures by nature, we find happiness in experiences and being around people we enjoy the company of. money plays a role to a certain extent, but its not the be all end all for happiness.
I'm a huge advocate for the benefits of climbing (with a friend or a partner). It can also be done very cheaply - bouldering with a £60 pair of shoes and £10 worth of chalk and a chalk bag (eBay is your friend here).
It's one of the best sports/activities for improving you both physically and mentally, and when combined with a relationship, either friendship or romantic, it can make that stronger also.
Money definitely can buy you happiness, but it can also buy you a pair of climbing shoes, and that's a fun and easy way to get to the same place.
The nostalgia part is interesting - I consider myself nostalgic, and I struggle with juggling between being happy remembering those events and also lamenting that things have changed and that I feel less happy in the moment. I'm sure I'm not the only one, and I probably need to do a better job of appreciating that I had those experiences rather than regretting that things arent quite like that any more
Loved the topic of this one and congrats on the podcast! Giving to others, whether that's our money or out time is something we could all do more of, myself included!
Awesome video, thank you! I've always been told by people with both more and less money than me that more money won't make me happier. I always say "I'll tell you when it stops making me happier then".
I think people just suck at using it to make themselves happier. Great advice on how to do so in this vid.
Brilliant - give your time helping young people, it will make you happy, guaranteed 👍
no problem you have in life will be worse because you have money. there is nothing wrong inherently with building a bank account, building wealth, literally every problem you encounter in life will be easier if you have money to get you through it. everybody would be better off by developing ways of earning money. you HAVE to do something in life, so why not do lucrative things.
ETHICALLY
Appreciation can only bring happiness when there are things around you that you genuinely can reflect on and be appreciative for. This is just not the case when say a family member dies tragically, or a loved one leaves you or a natural disaster/war displaces you from your home. There’s no space for appreciation other than suffering, grief and depression. And these events can cause a lasting impact on your life for many, many years.
It’s a privilege to be able to look back and see life progress in 12 months, and I’m saying this as someone who’s lived through bucketloads of trauma and is finally seeing improvements in my life.
This video is so deep its literally just made me realise a lot of things
i love giving away, where i live we have a pretty bad drug/alcohol/homelessness problem. plus a lot of my relatives are amongst them. i love the feeling of helping someone’s day in a little way cause it will go a long way for them. for me it’s 5 dollars but to them it’s a day where they don’t have to worry. if it’s an extreme temp i’ll give them water, or feet/hand warmers. it’s so easy to do. i hate how hard it is for ppl to do, ppl have so many hang ups when giving away here. “what if they spend it on alcohol or drugs” idc if they do tbh, sometimes they need it. alcohol is a pretty bad thing to cold turkey (seizures). so what if i this 5 dollars i give them prevents that. i’ve been down low before so i can understand how someone can get in that position.
Climbing is the real answer to happiness.
… the walls? Cause I’ve been doing that and 🤷♀️
Such a great watch but an even better message and story line. Absolutely smashing it man 🎉
This was a phenomenal video. My favourite of yours yet. It was important, applicable, clear, relevant, and well produced. Please do more like this 🙏 well done! 🙌
Lifestyle creep is so real. The best advice I ever got was that even if I got a promotion at work or got a raise is to not let that get my head and still live as if I’m making a beginner salary. Not to say that you should deprive yourself but cutting out unnecessary and extravagant purchases is very important.
Damien as a spokesmen for Big Air fryer, I have had my air fryer for just over a year and I still love it and is a genuine source of happiness with every wedge I make.
All hail the drawer of wedges
I’m in a very fortunate position that I’m 50 and paid off mortgages on homes in England and Scotland which we live between. But by doing that I’ve lost my motivation a bit. I want to retire early so paying into that more but I’m thinking about saving and buying a home in Spain as well just to give me a renewed focus in life and goal. Then the idea is the family can live between the 3 when I retire. But on the other hand I could use the money to go on holidays with family to different places. And I have to say, paying off the mortgages was an anti climax. I did it to feel more secure financially (and I have a distrust of banks so wanted to rid myself of them) but strangely I don’t seem to be able to shake off money worries even if I don’t have any. The happiness graphs probably apply.
Another great video and very true, I experience this when I got rid of my company car and bought an old version golf estate was difficult at first but now surprisingly I love my 10 year old golf as I feel more humbled
Great real life example this! Also that golf will look after you for 10 more years. Awesome cars
On a related note, i listened to your first podcast, i loved it. Your guest was very down to earth, had no airs and graces, which was perfect for me. Also she didnt mind the odd expletive :)
Best video yet, and that's saying something. Full of brilliant takeaways that I and a lot of others needed to hear. It's nice to see the meme clips stitched in again. LOLed at the "satisfaction" dub.
This is such a great video, you briefly mentioned stoicism and you could've definitely gone down that rabbit hole as this video can be easily summed up as learn about stocisim
I’m glad I found your channel the other day, this video is just perfect🤝
Glad you enjoy it!
This is the first time I have ever commented on any RUclips video and I have watched a lot. Outstanding content and delivery. Well done.
Thank you! Really appreciate you commenting on the delivery and i have been trying to improve this
Just wanted to say Damien,
You’re the best. Thank you for what you do.
Thank you 🙏🏻
I love videos like these. It helps us take a step back & breathe. And actually better understand what and why we are doing things
"Pascal rings the bell and the rat gets excited and then they don't feed the rat. pricks!" haha lol!
Brilliant different video, I will try and watch this a few times over coming weeks, it's so true things get old very quick and you should be happy with what you already have and appreciate it more ❤ and also totally agree its good to save for future but there is a happy medium you have to try enjoy some of your money to be happy and do the things you want to do 😊
' Society grows great when old men plant trees whos shade they know they will never sit in '
I’ve watched a lot of your videos & never commented but I have to say I laughed so hard through this, fantastic editing & clips. A LOT of effort went into making this look so smooth & it’s really good 👍🏾
Brilliant comment! Thank you for leaving it.
I love the hollistic overview on money in this video thank you
Great video Damo. It's not all about saving as much money as possible for the future, it's about enjoying life with variety and experiences. This has definitely changed my perspective on happiness.
Best video you’ve done by far 👍🏾… I’ve shared it with all my friends, so good.
Thank you so much for sharing it! Legend
This is one of the best self help videos ive ever watched. Thanks mate, brilliant advice
I inherited a fair bit of money. I own property and ive traveled the world.
I couldnt handle going from having nothing to a fair bit. I got ideas above my station. Ripped out the heart of the girl of my dreams who worshipped me.
I was happier struggling, id give it all to that girl. I would give her the lot i don't want it. I want her
I think most people go through heart break and coming to terms with the fact you messed it up is part of growing as a man. Instead of dwelling on it like you are, improve yourself and when the next girl who comes along who worships you then you are ready.