Removing ex's stuff from
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- Опубликовано: 13 янв 2025
- Mariah is ending a 20-year marriage after years of domestic abuse. Her soon-to-be-ex-husband came through the house and garage and marked all of the items that he is claiming and now we are moving the garage items to a storage unit to get it out of the way so her roommate can park her car in the garage for the winter. I am being helped today by Sara who is one of my husband's students from his Forensics class. She has quite a traumatic story as well.
I also talk a lot about the pay-it-forward movement and how it brings a lot of light and hope to people.
If you would like to help others, but don't know how, you are always welcome to donate through my PayPal link. I use those funds to help purchase needed items for the homeowner's I help and I will show those items in future videos so that you can see what you helped to purchase. Thanks so much for your support!
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It seems pretty stupid to me that the public is told not to use plastic, and to recycle all of it that they do deal with. Yet the corporations sell everything in plastic. When do the corporations become the ones held responsible for the production of all of the plastic, and we quit blaming the consumers who have no choice in the matter, thanks to the corporations producing it all?
Suggestion: Try Tru Earth laundry detergent, Dropps dishwasher tabs, “who gives a crap” toilet paper, Trader Joe’s shampoo bars, and terra pure conditioner bars. These are my plastic free choices. We all need to experiment with our own choice of products. 💙
Looks so good 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Where I’m at you have to put your trash in a plastic bag then in the garbage can. You can’t put your recyclables in a bag 🙄
Same here,@@alishatoleu4062. The trick is to minimize your trash. I only generate one full black trash bag per month. When I stopped eating so many carbs, why waste dropped dramatically.
We don’t even have recycling where I’m at. But seeing as how almost half of ocean plastics are from the commercial fishing industry, and the majority of land, air and water pollution is from animal agriculture, the most effective way to make a difference is to eat plant based ❤️
Why do we do it. We dump everything in the garage then just move it around for years instead of throwing it away. I hope this lady gets the strength in time to throw it all away.
I would have told the ex to come and get all his stuff, or I would sell it or put it on the curb.
Oddly enough, she is not vengeful at all. She hopes that he gets the help he needs to not continue the abuse. She's trying to take the high road. I was actually very impressed. I think in the long run, it brings more peace than actually getting revenge. But I totally feel you. It would be hard not to do that.😄
My pastor always says that the best ability is AVAILABILITY. The willingness to help others is a virtue. You do great work Bonnie.
I love that so much. Sometimes just sitting with someone amidst their trial is just what they need.❤️
Oh man did the "control something" part resonate with me. 25+ years later after DV, I still clean certain parts of my house and my vehicle meticulously because it is something I can have total control over in my day to day life.
Sarah reminds me of Jodie foster in that movie about Hannibal Lecter. I love that your hubby supports you and encourages his students to follow you!
She does! I didn't see it until you pointed that out.😁
Camo is clearly so friendly allowing strangers to hold her like that and do her nails. A lot of cats would have given you the stink eye for that and she was so chill!
She was a sweetheart. 💕
❤❤❤😊
Awww Camo....so sweet and 18, wow!!!
You two did an incredible job with this garage, and went above and beyond with cat grooming. This was great to watch.
Thank you!
I have Trigeminal Neuralgia and it's also considered a "Suicide Disease " with 25% of the people diagnosed with it committing suicide. But I am thankful for it because it brought to light an underlying issue. Long story, irrelevant to this video. But, may God help her thrive through this difficult situation, and hopefully, it will shed light on an amazing path.
I have heard that as well. Sara and I actually talked about both TN and CRPS being two of the very worst things you can experience. I'm so sorry to hear you had that! I used to type notes for neurosurgeons who took care of people with trigeminal neuralgia by cutting that nerve, which was pretty effective, though leaves part of your face numb. Did you have that surgery done?
@ABeautifulMessExtremeCle-zl1wp I was too scared to do surgery! But luckily, my symptoms lightened to a bearable degree.
Free kitty grooming, as well. How could you go wrong? I love that cat, she is so pretty. Nice work girls!
You did a good job as always. I wouldn't have known where to start. Well done and keep up the good work. I like that you help so many people for free. (loved the cat)
Sweet kitty! It's really nice of you ladies to help with this. What an emotionally loaded situation.
I think Dana K. White is most useful when you're decluttering and trying to get things under control. Her book How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind is the best basic guide when you come to the realization that you are overwhelmed and need to make changes. Clutterbug is more helpful when you've made progress and are now trying to organize instead of just digging yourself out. They are both useful but have different areas of focus, so they're most helpful for different stages of the journey. With the work you do, I can definitely see why Dana's work is your favorite.
I listened to two of her books last week, including the one you mentioned, and I'm loving all of the little tidbits I'm learning. Like I said in the video, a lot of it is stuff that I already do, but it's helpful to have the "phrases" and "rules" to use to help explain it better when I help people.😁💜
Agreed that different methods work depending on where you’re at. I’ve used several methods for myself personally and with others that I’ve worked with.
I like how you can listen to different books about cleaning and just one thing may work for you but change EVERYTHING! Years ago I read an article about a man whose wife died and was now raising his children on his own. He instituted a rule that if he went in a room and found someone had left things in it they had to come pick it up and three more things. LIFE CHANGER!!
Unconsciously children know that if they throw their coat and backpack down the worst thing that will happen is they may have to come back and put them away. And more likely their parents will do it for them! But if they know they're going to have to put it away themselves and ALSO load or put away three things out of the dishwasher, or fold three towels out of the dryer, or sweep the dining room for three minutes they think twice about walking away from messes they created! I kid you not when I say that I was consistent with this for one week and within that month my whole house changed!
And because this was huge for helping take a load off my shoulders as a single mother I also added a rule that if I caught you leaving a mess and gave you the consequences of three more things but you didn't complete the three that it would triple into nine! That way I wasn't having to keep remembering to check if they had completed their consequences. A few times of having to fold and put away nine extra things and they made sure never to "forget"!!
You're doing a wonderful thing Bonnie helping those in need no matter what their situation is ❤😊
You angels. Even groomed the senior kitty. ❤️
Your work is touching the lives of people you don't even know about. The positive "pay it forward" message is spread because of the work you do and the videos you share. Blessings to you for making a difference. What an inspiration Sarah is too!
I appreciate that!🥰
As someone with CRPS, I totally understand her pain. I've got 2 neurostimulators to control mine, as it has spread from my left foot to my entire lower body. *GO* Sarah! Also, thank you for everything you do to help people like Mariah.
Oh man. I'm so sorry you struggle with CRPS. I'm glad you have some neurostimulators to help. It sounds incredibly painful!
I read Marie Kondo and just rolled my eyes through the entire book. She lived with her parents and was organizing her bedroom. Made me nuts.
The kitty is excited there's a big open garage space. 😃
Awwwww ❤, sweetness 😊 the cat and the young lady.
Thank you so much for telling us about the Canadian woman who needed cleaning help and the many offers to help from your subscribers. That made me smile from head to toe! I can’t stop listening to the news, but it’s so depressing and disheartening. It highlights greediness and total disregard for other people, animals, and our planet. So, hearing about people reaching out and offering to help others is beyond wonderful! Thank you for all that you do to help others and for sharing with us!
You are so welcome! I need to hear that kind of stuff myself to remember that there is still a lot of good in the world. Especially with my husband's career and all of the awful things he has to see, I feel like I need to balance it out by doing more good and it's awesome to hear about others doing the same.😊❤️
I can't imagine not recycling. I'm obsessive about it. My town has weekly curbside recycling pickup, so I realize I'm lucky. If you're not sure what happens to the items you take to recycling, ask the facility that handles the recyclables how the items will be disposed of. Metal and glass are almost 100% recyclable. Plastic is more tricky.
BTW, Midwest Magic Cleaning’s tip about the ultrafine microfiber cloths is a game changer! My mirrors and glasses and iPad screen have never been so clear!
There is a man in Canada (Curiosity Inc.), near Edmonton, that has done videos on hoarder houses that he has purchased or bought the inventory and totally cleaned out the houses to get them ready to be sold, he is in the antique business.
That is awesome!
You and Sarah did a great job. I am glad Sarah is in remission and hopefully she stays in remission.
You are a miracle worker. And can I just say how happy I was to see you take care of the sweet old cat too?!!! Wow. Heart of gold 💛
Shout out to both you and your helper this week!! You did an amazing job!! 👏👏👏👏
As a Canadian I too am available to help if anyone is in need in the Vancouver Lower Mainland area
So awesome! Thank you!🙏💕
Bravo to you for taking a step back and recognizing what Mariah needed in order to trust the process. From what you’ve told of her story I would imagine that her voice has not often been heard or respected. I too would struggle feeling like I needed to be “doing something,” but the something you were doing was an essential service for this particular client. Taking action doesn’t always look the same.
Excellent take! Good point!
Exactly. It was very helpful to know more of her story before we got started. And I'm learning that I don't always need to be busy doing something in order to help. Sometimes listening is the best help you can give.😊❤️👍
I worked in a pain center and we did clinical trials for complex regional pain syndrome.
I have it in my foot from a broken bone that never healed right
I probably have complex regional pain syndrome-I’m going to a pain specialist this week for a diagnosis. I have had unresolved pain since an ankle replacement last sept. Interesting that it would come up this week in this video.
Great job helping her. There is so much stuff to deal with. I have been getting rid of so many things that I do not use anymore and I feel so much better. And is able to find things easier that I do need.
Welcome Sara/h!!! What a great experience, could be of help with your forensic career. Thanks Bonnie for always providing great information throughout your videos.
In the video description you find the spelling of her name :-)
@@LeaSonnenscheinTrierin the dictionary you can find the spelling of description
@@jangarr222 Thank you. I didn't notice it. That happens most often when I don't change my phone settings from my native language German to English. Because it was just a short sentence, I thought I could write it without that change. So thank you for your hint, I will correct my misspelling.
Great transformation! I hope Mariah can be free of her ex now. Must have been horrible to have all that stuff of his around.
I'm so glad the microphone is working in your office! It's such a great one, and the sound is good to me. Love you always!
Hi Mira! Yes, I love my new microphone! Love you, girl!❤️
Amazing job you two! Wonderful of you to help someone in need.
I hope kitty is an indoor kitty. I saw Camo there in the garage. She reminds me of my precious Maddy who crossed the rainbow bridge at 18.5
This has been fun to watch I'm sorry but you know love you God bless you 🙏❤️
Looking forward to a kitchen re-organization. Sarah is such a sweetheart.
Helllooooo. From Winnipeg Mb Canada. Love watching your videos. Great job 😊😊😊😊
Hello 😊 and thank you!
I think the fact that you've met people that have had so much (unusual) trauma speaks a lot to the fact that "messy houses" aren't due to "laziness" or "excuses" as we so often see internet trolls saying.
Even Sara (who's had trauma) who is helping rather than receiving help at the moment, only wants to help because she was in a position of needing help at one point in time and she knows how it feels. Her compassion and empathy has moved her much like yours has.
Trauma is definitely an underlying theme to these situations.
That's something folks who can't imagine being in this situation need to remember. ❤
The garage looks amazing. It must be like a breath of fresh air for Mariah and her roommate. 😊
Well said, Shelly. Trauma has definitely been a huge factor in probably 95+% of these individuals and none of us can ever know how we would deal with the same circumstances, so there is really no place for judgment here. Thank you for always being so kind. 🥰
New subscriber here. I have CRPS on my entire left side as the result of a sprained ankle. It’s so difficult to treat. The pain can be worse than child birth. But, the most painful experience I have had was pulmonary embolisms. I was in the ICU for 2 weeks. My CRPS pain was nothing like the embolisms. I’m always sad when I learn other people have CRPS. I am permanently disabled due to mine along with a rare autoimmune disease & heart issues. It’s mentally exhausting dealing with chronic pain. You are amazing to help people at no cost. I have been binge watching & am hoping I can get my craft room under control soon.
First of all, welcome! I'm so glad you're here! I'm really sorry to hear that you deal with CRPS and other health issues. I also have chronic pain, though you wouldn't know that by watching my videos because I have a secret weapon. Maybe you have already tried this or at least heard of it, but have you ever tried low-dose naltrexone? That is one thing that helped Sarah a lot with her CRPS and it is something that was recommended by my pain specialist and it has been a life changer! I won't go into all of the details about how it works because there's a lot of information out there and I don't have time to detail it all here, but it's a very safe drug that has been around for several decades and works with the body very naturally. It's one of the only medications that naturopaths will even prescribe because it works so naturally with the body. Anyway, if you wanted to do your own research about it, the LDN Research Trust website has a ton of information or you can even type in LDN and CRPS and there's a lot of information that comes up when you Google that. I mentioned it to one of my other subscribers who also deals with chronic pain and she has been on it since December and said that she has never felt better and has more energy. I'm not trying to be a doctor here, but if it's something that can help you, I feel like you should at least know about it. Good luck!
So sweet to groom the kitty! I’m sympathetic because I have a 20yr old cat who needs help grooming herself but doesn’t really like to be brushed. It’s a real challenge!
Wow, 20?! That's incredible!
I would be overwhelmed for weeks, if I took out a my stuff (of one category) out at once! Small areas for me any time. It is a little easier when someone helps me, but when I’m alone I need those small spaces and manageable goals.
I totally agree! I love Dana K. White's methods. It sounds a lot like how you tackle things. It's definitely overwhelming on your own to do a big project like this.
The garage looks great! What a difference-like night and day! You and Sara are total sweethearts for giving Camo a bit of grooming!
🥰🙏
Camo is beautiful. Reminds me of my two sister torties.
Great job, ladies! Sarah is an amazing young woman to want to help others at such a young age, and especially after what she has endured.
Hearing these heart-warming stories is a good reminder that there is more good in the world than there is bad. It is hard to see and easy to forget sometimes. Bonnie -- you have a very amazing "audience." 🥰 Much appreciation for those that put love out there and hoping that love circles back around to you! (Which is very fitting for today, Valentine's Day. 💘)
Thanks, Tish!
Clutterbug drives me nuts. She is too much of a perfectionist.
Bonnie, I just love you. Honey, we cannot out give God....and He is working OT right now with you and others that are paying it forward. What an AMAZING God we serve! I am praying that billions get saved thru all that is going on right now. Lord, thank you, and please hear our prayers. Above ALL...may YOUR WILL be done. In Jesus Name...Amen.
So true. Thank you for your faith. 🙏❤️
I started a channel too all because of you & Mack. I am in IN and recently started!
Good luck on your cleaning journey🎉
No way!! That's awesome! I'm going to head over and check it out. Congratulations! I love to hear that!❤️💙💜👏😊👍
Okay, I just went and subscribed. I see you are still in the filming and editing stage and haven't uploaded yet. I will anxiously wait your first video!🫶😊
@@ABeautifulMessExtremeCle-zl1wp I just love how supportive you and Mack are to new channels, that's so nice to see❤️
OMG the the sort by thing piles…I wish more people would do that. Cleaning out my partners mothers house….we got all of the books in one spot and there were legit duplicates, and up to 5 copies of a single book. People really don’t keep track of what they own. I did this before a move and was able be able to move into a smaller place. So I would definitely recommend doing the category piles over or twice a decade!
I really enjoy cleaning too. It’s also hard for me to be still. I have OCD and it really helps me to clean and organize. And if I can use my OCD to help others that’s certainly a win win.
I love it!😁👏💜
I love how calm the cat was in your arms as it was being groomed. Congrats on become a cat grandma, he looks beautiful 😍
Thank you! 😊
Camo is a tortoise shell cat. I had two of them and they were both sweethearts.
Recycling is a challenge where I live because it depends on whether your neighborhood pays for it or not. I decided I would recycle paper & cardboard even if I have to take it to a facility myself. For plastic, etc. I put whatever the waste company will take. It changes based on the company and the contract. Luckily right now they take all recyclable paper, plastic, and glass. We’re starting to see companies that pick up food waste too. I’m especially happy about that one!
It is challenging because things change all the time and, if you don't put the correct things in your recycle bin or if it's not clean enough, the whole thing gets tossed. It's a little overwhelming to me, but I am going to try to be better about it and also reuse a lot of the items I already have.
Congratulations, grandma! God bless you .for helping others.❤
Thank you!💞
I really like the "We clean 4 free" channel. I subscribed. Glad you got a chance to organize the garage. Looks like it need a good going thru. So cute you gals taking care of Camo.
Wow! Bravo 👏 to you and Sarah! 😊 That was quite a job for you ladies. Well done 👏 ❤
Thank you so much!
What a great change! I’m glad you had a helper too. You are making a tremendous difference to this woman’s life. 😊
This must be a relief for the homeowner, to get some energy into the home and lovely people to help. It´s looking so much better.
Wonderful video. That’s my girl. She’s always chipped in and helped others her whole life. She’s amazing. Way to go Sarah. The therapy name you were looking for is called scrambler therapy for CRPS treatment.
Hi Sarah's dad! 👋 You raised a wonderful daughter. I only worked with her that one day, but she is an incredible person. ❤️ 😊
Awesome 👍🏾 job ❤❤❤❤
Thank you 🤗
QC is short for Quebec. ☺ Thank you for mentioning Dana K White, I had forgotten about her channel.
I love you. Thank you so much. Thank you for being you.
You're the best! Thank you!💕
Welcome Sara! I’m so glad that Sara was able to get help and relief for that. I went through the same thing after two total knee replacements on each leg. It was horrible but with therapy and relaxation techniques have learned to live with it. Bonnie, I had to chuckle when you were talking about the Marie Kondo method….that would triple my anxiety 😂. I’m one of those neat, clean and organized people but I believe in living in our home and family and guests feeling cozy and comfortable. You always do such an amazing job and so glad you could help this woman with a new chapter in her life. I went through that many years ago and it’s tough going through, this will be a huge help to her!
Oh my goodness, really?! You also had CRPS? Yikes! I'm glad you have gotten some relief with therapy. Yes, Marie Kondo...definitely not the answer for everyone. 😄
I LOVE Minimal Mom most but Dana is great for getting a hold of chaos.
Great job ladies 😊
Thank you! 🤗
Love this episode! You and Sarah are simply amazing!! - Belinda
Thank you so much!
I think you're awesome for helping people cleaning with different types people. ❤❤❤❤
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼great video
Thank you!!
Great job Bonnie and Sarah! The garage looks really tidy and clean. I reuse plastic as much as possible. I put laundry soap into a small mouthwash bottle to take to the laundry mat instead of having to carry the big container. I also refill the big container at a bulk food store. Every small thing you do adds up.
Great tip with the laundry soap. Thanks for sharing!
You continue to amaze me about how nice you are to others. It was great Sarah was able to join in and help as well. You are spreading more love around the world. Keep up the good deeds for others!
Thank you so much!
A kind thing you did here. Wonderful storytelling. I love the term grandkitty. ♥♥♥
Sarah worked so much! I hope your husband gave her an A+++ extra credit for helping you. Nice work!
😄❤️
I think Dana and Cas teach different things. Cas teaches more about how people organize and Dana is more about decluttering. I know they both go into both, but I think they focus differently. You are a really special person to have the desire to serve. Bless you. :)
Dana K White is my favorite when it comes to decluttering! So much that I just got rid of a couple of decluttering books I used to preach to people before🤣😂but Dana just makes it feel so simple and love how she makes it all fact based not emotion based and without judgment, also talking to people who have overwhelming amount of stuff with understanding as someone who has been through it
I know. I love her so much. And I love how real she is. Like I could see myself hanging out with her. I know she works a lot with Cas the clutterbug and minimal mom, but I can't really handle those two for some reason. I just really like Dana.
@@ABeautifulMessExtremeCle-zl1wp I know what you mean😅🥰 I remember I suggested a collab with her, but it wouldn't have to be a meeting, it could be like a video conference video, just chatting, seeing you two together in a video even though it's not in the same space. It's just an idea for maybe way way in the future, just thought it'd be really cool, also because you do really feel like you could connect and talk :)
your videos are so amazing and inspiring, this video especially gets me because my mother went through a divorce and after moving her place is still cluttered with boxes she can't bring herself to open, over 5 years ago she moved. you are such a great human and your kindness always reminds me to remember there is still good in the world
Yeah, I can imagine that would be hard to want to even look at those boxes again. It's crazy what trauma can do to a person. I wish her the very best!
I love Dana k white too!
I love garage organization videos!!! Great job, ladies!! Little Camo is a cutie!! 🥰
Thank you!! 😊
Hello Everyone! So graceful of you to get "Mariah" a new peaceful space. I knew abuse (anger) toward the end of my second marriage and it was unsettling. Thank you for all you do! Awwwh! Camo is the same age as my beautiful and loved Yoshi-San. 😻💝
You two did a fantastic job!!!! I hope yourvAuntie loved it and that it made her feel happier and calmer to know she is well loved ❤❤❤❤❤
Looks great! Bet she's glad to get that stuff out of there!!
Looking great... plenty of room for another car !!
It's so funny to hear you talking to Sara about the comment I made to you about Marie Kondo's switch in attitude. 😄 It's funny how circumstances can change things, sometimes for the better.
😄
I love that you help all types of ppl & that you tell others to not leave negative comments
Nice work Bonnie!!! 😀
Thank you so much 😀
Wow good job ladies
What a pretty kitty ❤
What you are Bonnie, is a blessing! I think it's wonderful that you are also getting to grow during the process (patience). Looking forward to watching the rest of this series. Hugs Sarah xxxx
Thanks so much!
Enjoyed from Texas!
Another amazing result from your diligence in cleaning and organizing! Good job to you and Sarah!❤
Thanks so much! 😊
Awesome!❤
Hi Bonnie! How are you? I pray you are well. 🙂You are such a lovely soul. The blessings you freely give to folks is so wonderful! It was nice to hear about Sarah and I pray for her complete healing! I really enjoy listening to you: hearing the stories, the background of the folks you help, and just everyday life. How sweet to help Mariah with the washing machine! It truly warmed my heart. I love that the kitty was so happy and trusting as you both groomed her. The garage looks so amazing. Bravo you two! God bless you and TY for the hope you give to so many! ~John
Thank you, John! As always, your prayers are felt.🙏❤️
Oh Ms Bonnie if I lived close to I’d love to come help you help someone else by cleaning. You are such a sweet sweet lady for helping all these people.
Aw, thank you, Tammy!🙏💕
You girls did a great job...keep them coming ...love the before and after shots...🥰🥰
Thank you so much 🤗
Great job!
What a hard job!
I truly enjoyed this one so much, thank you ❤
I'm so glad!
Great job by you both, I love to clean and organize my garages, feels like a new place. Congratulations Cat Grandma on your first grand kitty. 😄😄
Thank you so much!😁
Awesome job!!!!
Thank you!
Y'all did an awesome job! Such a blessing 🌻🍄
Great job Bonnie you n your helper rocked out that garage..keep it going doll..
🙏
Hi Bonnie
Amazing Clean!! Thank you for sharing.
Thank you! 😊