I feel like the mom was TRYING to ruin the proposal. Honestly telling him might be a good indication if you should accept or not. If he doesn't stand up to her it wouldn't bode well for the relationship
First off, congratulations! But also I would seriously discuss and agree upon strict boundaries and strategies with your in laws because your MIL to be doesn't understand boundaries and doesn't get verbal or physical cues and communication. This is her personality and she doesn't seem to understand that aspects of her personality make it difficult for people to be around her and why. To her, she probably thinks she is just being friendly, kind, and supportive and cannot fathom that what she is really being is obnoxious, intrusive, and disrespectful. Your fiancé also needs to understand that he cannot tell his mother everything because the woman holds secrets like a sieve holds water. That will make a lot of problems later down the line between you two especially when it comes to conflicts or deeply personal issues.
The OP is getting cooked on Reddit 🤣🤣 she keeps responding to comments saying that she wants to tell him but is going to omit the part about his mother being the one to spill the beans… what if his mom is the only person he told? Or one of the few people? It’s not gonna be long before he puts 2 and 2 together and it’s not a good look at all to half ass the honesty. Based on how the mother seems to be intentionally disregarding her boundaries and not taking “no” for an answer, it is a matter of time before she goes to her son and tells him she told her. So the fact is, he is going to find out eventually that she knew all along and “faked” the surprise???!! Not a good look either!! Overall terrible spot for OP to be in but I feel even worse for the fiancé!!
I knew when my boyfriend bought the ring. He knew I wanted him to ask my dad for permission first. When visiting my family home I gave him tons of options to talk to my dad alone. When he finally asked my dad, they were doing an active together that I really wanted to participate in. My dad was surprised I didn’t and so was my mom. I knew he was running out of time for this trip and the next opportunity would be in multiple years. I knew his flight was in a couple days. Yet I was completely surprised. I had told him the type of jewelry I like and the ring was perfect. I knew he was playing to propose when it was just the two of us. I was not expecting to finish brushing my teeth and open up my bathroom door to him on one knee after we had parted ways for the night. Even though I knew so much I was still surprised.
Depends do you like the plan? If so then no. But if you don't like it maybe tell him so he can change things up. But explain his mom told him so he don't tell her again
How are so many of you getting married AFTER ONLY FOUR YEARS ???? You didn't even reach the second hurdle of long term coexistence and y'all having BABIES , for christ's sake .
I feel like the mom was TRYING to ruin the proposal. Honestly telling him might be a good indication if you should accept or not. If he doesn't stand up to her it wouldn't bode well for the relationship
First off, congratulations! But also I would seriously discuss and agree upon strict boundaries and strategies with your in laws because your MIL to be doesn't understand boundaries and doesn't get verbal or physical cues and communication. This is her personality and she doesn't seem to understand that aspects of her personality make it difficult for people to be around her and why. To her, she probably thinks she is just being friendly, kind, and supportive and cannot fathom that what she is really being is obnoxious, intrusive, and disrespectful. Your fiancé also needs to understand that he cannot tell his mother everything because the woman holds secrets like a sieve holds water. That will make a lot of problems later down the line between you two especially when it comes to conflicts or deeply personal issues.
The OP is getting cooked on Reddit 🤣🤣 she keeps responding to comments saying that she wants to tell him but is going to omit the part about his mother being the one to spill the beans… what if his mom is the only person he told? Or one of the few people? It’s not gonna be long before he puts 2 and 2 together and it’s not a good look at all to half ass the honesty. Based on how the mother seems to be intentionally disregarding her boundaries and not taking “no” for an answer, it is a matter of time before she goes to her son and tells him she told her. So the fact is, he is going to find out eventually that she knew all along and “faked” the surprise???!! Not a good look either!! Overall terrible spot for OP to be in but I feel even worse for the fiancé!!
You should tell him. There's dozens of reasons why but at the end of the day you should tell him.
Tell him she deliberatly tried to ruin it he deserves the chance to make it a suprise
Don't tell him.. poor babe.. Pretend to be surprised...See the only person who will be hurt is him..The mom is jealous...
I knew when my boyfriend bought the ring. He knew I wanted him to ask my dad for permission first. When visiting my family home I gave him tons of options to talk to my dad alone. When he finally asked my dad, they were doing an active together that I really wanted to participate in. My dad was surprised I didn’t and so was my mom. I knew he was running out of time for this trip and the next opportunity would be in multiple years. I knew his flight was in a couple days. Yet I was completely surprised. I had told him the type of jewelry I like and the ring was perfect. I knew he was playing to propose when it was just the two of us. I was not expecting to finish brushing my teeth and open up my bathroom door to him on one knee after we had parted ways for the night. Even though I knew so much I was still surprised.
Nope, you should tell him
The main problem her is why his mother knew all the details in the first place.
Yes
Depends do you like the plan? If so then no. But if you don't like it maybe tell him so he can change things up. But explain his mom told him so he don't tell her again
This a man??!
How are so many of you getting married AFTER ONLY FOUR YEARS ???? You didn't even reach the second hurdle of long term coexistence and y'all having BABIES , for christ's sake .