Therapist Reacts to Love Is Blind: After the Altar Part 2 | Cole, why???

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  • Опубликовано: 2 фев 2025

Комментарии • 439

  • @kegialiasa
    @kegialiasa Год назад +1756

    I think it’s unfair that Cole is getting so much hate, when Bartise literally broke Nancy, and no one is chastising him about it (except her family). I think Nancy’s attempt to forgive Bartise spared him the wrath of the group. Meanwhile Zay seems to want to “punish” Cole, and now everyone is adopting her view of him.

    • @jazzyboo100
      @jazzyboo100 Год назад +26

      ‼️‼️‼️

    • @TheMaltebella
      @TheMaltebella Год назад +14

      Agreed.

    • @ThisIntrovertLife
      @ThisIntrovertLife Год назад +104

      I agree but I feel like the group gives Bartise a pass b/c Nancy has given him a pass. Whether she wants to admit it or not, Nancy still wants Bartise and refuses to call him out on his wrongs so I think the group just stands with her and lets it go. Very sad.

    • @millievanillie90
      @millievanillie90 Год назад +60

      Bartise looked so surprised when Nancy said she didn't want to be friends and I think that says so much. I think Nancy is wanting closure or for him to change his mind so much that she doesn't really see how he already rejected her and mistreated her.

    • @valerieosei5312
      @valerieosei5312 Год назад +18

      Say it again for all the clowns at the back

  • @LoveVanita
    @LoveVanita Год назад +593

    Bartise just wanted to keep the friendship so that he can keep Nancy around for his own entertainment whenever he wants to

    • @infringedblue
      @infringedblue Год назад +70

      Basically. She's there to fluff his ego, he cares nothing about her as he says

    • @cupofchi_
      @cupofchi_ Год назад +9

      Bingo 🎯

    • @1manlone
      @1manlone Год назад +20

      Yea definitely so he can drunk text her at 3 am to ask "wyd" and " can I come over"

    • @islabee94
      @islabee94 7 месяцев назад

      Absolutely

  • @valerieosei5312
    @valerieosei5312 Год назад +654

    The thing I found interesting was when Cole was trying to address what everyone “heard” but Brennon immediately cut him off and said, “No, what I KNOW” - but then he immediately says “you either called Zay too fat or that she eats too much” - my thing is, if you supposedly KNOW what happened, then you shouldn’t be fumbling with details like this. And whats more, is that it is indeed what he HEARD, not what he knows, and he’s using it to punish Cole. I think Brennon has some serious displaced anger. And because he can’t direct it at Alexa or even at Alexa’s dad, he projects some of it on to Cole. He literally has decided to hate Cole so much, yet make it seem like he’s looking to bury the hatchet. It makes no sense.

    • @shakiramarie5055
      @shakiramarie5055 Год назад +29

      I 100% agree with you.

    • @d.d.1397
      @d.d.1397 Год назад +50

      Right I think he’s an insecure angry guy and is totally projecting right now on Cole

    • @infringedblue
      @infringedblue Год назад +54

      My EXACT sentiments. He (and it looks like his whole side of the family) are under Alexa's and her dad's thumb, his over reaction to Cole just seems like the outlet for that suppression and rage. I'm very uncomfortable with that family dynamic even though they are supposedly the picture of unity and togetherness 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @Xeus86
      @Xeus86 Год назад +14

      I feel that Brennan may think things are not problematic for himself in the long run . But he will come to being resentful over Alexis’ upbringing in the future , and that’s not honestly her fault , it’s her dads

    • @G0dismabestfren
      @G0dismabestfren Год назад +37

      He also told him that if he reconciles with Zay he may consider forgiving him. Who says that ???? If I were Cole I would be like I don't need this human in my life.

  • @WilliamsPinch
    @WilliamsPinch Год назад +662

    I feel so bad for Nancy’s family. They so desperately want to protect her from her poor choices in partners. Watching her suppress her actual emotions behind that smile is PAINFUL. 🥴

    • @KB-qy8ps
      @KB-qy8ps Год назад +10

      Which is ironic considering most people choose their partners in a subconscious attempt to replicate their childhood family dynamics.

  • @dct90210
    @dct90210 Год назад +573

    Bartiste fawned over Raven at the pool party but Cole gets crap for his comments about Colleen.
    Bartiste pulled away from Nancy because she wasn't what he wanted physically but Cole got closer to Zanab hyping up her beauty/body all the time.
    Bartiste was sleeping with people immediately after breaking up with Nancy but Cole literally was heartbroken.
    Please tell me how Brennon is furious at Cole but not Bartiste??? Bartiste treated Nancy like garbage and Nancy literally did nothing to deserve it. Cole was trying with Zanab to the very end.

    • @brendamoon2660
      @brendamoon2660 Год назад +14

      I dislike Cole and Bartiste equally. They are both fake, disloyal, and inconsiderate

    • @joanna0988
      @joanna0988 Год назад +40

      It's because Zanab played a strong victim game. I bet she can cry on cue. So she sucked them all in emotionally and they're angry at Cole for her 😩

    • @joanna0988
      @joanna0988 Год назад +60

      ​@@brendamoon2660 You think Cole is fake? I think he's immature but he also has no filter which makes it hard to be fake.

    • @brendamoon2660
      @brendamoon2660 Год назад +8

      @@joanna0988I think "no filter" and "honesty" are pretenses he uses to get away with the things he says. It looks calculated to me.

    • @joanna0988
      @joanna0988 Год назад +12

      @@brendamoon2660 But I don't think he said anything wrong? The only problematic thing was the pool talk with Colleen otherwise he didn't say anything to Zanab that was bad.

  • @EmpressEllie
    @EmpressEllie Год назад +356

    Cole lacks tact. But I don’t think he’s a bad guy. He’s not acting like a mean girl unlike the rest of the cast.

    • @lindseyroth6958
      @lindseyroth6958 Год назад +12

      It’s obvious he’s very inebriated during the party and that plays a part in his lack of filter.

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie Год назад

      @@lindseyroth6958 totally!

    • @edinscot56789
      @edinscot56789 Год назад +13

      ​@@lindseyroth6958 they're all inebriated. Every time you look they're drinking spirits all the time.

    • @singingjustice
      @singingjustice Год назад +4

      Love this comment! Definitely lacks Tact.

  • @Thatgyalash
    @Thatgyalash Год назад +258

    Nancy has to do some self work because I don't see why she would want to be friends with someone who called her unattractive throughout their entire relationship

    • @nameunknown1519
      @nameunknown1519 Год назад

      And then had sex with her while calling her unattractive… his behavior was gross

    • @CabinFever52
      @CabinFever52 Год назад +26

      ...and I thought she was the prettiest of the show.

    • @octopus4925
      @octopus4925 Год назад +12

      ​@@CabinFever52SAME!! I don't understand what's going on with this show lol she's beautiful!

  • @gabiluch87
    @gabiluch87 Год назад +381

    I love how Nancy's family didn't tell her sth in the lines of "don't cry over this idiot", they are fully supportive and validating of her emotions even if they don't like him nor agree with her choice of wanting to pursue a friendship with him.
    I don't have siblings, but I'd love to have a brother like that.

    • @henxo2382
      @henxo2382 Год назад +9

      Only child gang

    • @zahararay5611
      @zahararay5611 Год назад +11

      I LOVED THAT. I wasn’t ever allowed to cry. It was beautiful to see/hear that❤

  • @zzzmariana
    @zzzmariana Год назад +216

    Brennon definitely showed his true colors. I felt like he was a victim because of the way Alexa's friends and family treated him, but oh my.
    He's very judgemental and somewhat arrogant, and it's clear he's directing his anger towards Cole.

    • @ima.m.1658
      @ima.m.1658 Год назад +17

      Honestly i think it's more so Brennon blindly supports Alexa. Alexa is the one who has issues with Cole for no reason, and kept attacking his character. I think Brennon absorbed that from her, he seems like a nice dude

    • @G0dismabestfren
      @G0dismabestfren Год назад +11

      I agree with the judgemental part because of his reaction to Matt and Colleen's living situation. He acts like it was happening to him directly. I think he needs to chill.

    • @zzzmariana
      @zzzmariana Год назад +6

      @@ima.m.1658 yes, he supports whatever Alexa says for sure. But I also had the impression he's so invested in hating Cole because it's his way of releasing the anger he's keeping to himself. Alexa's father is giving Brennon a hard time and no one is supporting or defending him.

    • @babymoon555
      @babymoon555 Год назад

      Brennan has no backbone

  • @Momo-po5tn
    @Momo-po5tn Год назад +426

    Also Cole was there prob because producers wanted it, they probably sponsored Alexa's party so there is an excuse for everyone to get together. Cole has trouble with a filter, he is immature when it comes to his speech. The girls were very catty/gossipy for no reason. They still had an opportunity to get the "both sides" but they were more focused on making jokes or defending Zanab.
    Maybe they thought after everything aired they wanted to look like they have the moral highroad, but it looks bad for all of them. Also Brennon was such a loser for that talk with Cole. He and Alexa think they're better than others just because they're married. One day they'll realise no one is envious of them lol.

    • @13-goats53
      @13-goats53 Год назад +1

      @@mydeskiswobblyyesssss!!! I cannot stand them as a couple 😂😂 brennon just adopts Alexa’s opinions on everything. He’s her little chihuahua. All bark n no bite. He’s her puppet n she’s got her fist so deep up his butt he doesn’t see it. She seems entitled n spoiled. I’m sure she thinks they all envy her and brennon, they’re dumb

    • @HappyKT22
      @HappyKT22 Год назад +27

      absolutely! Brennon is trippin on his pride to prove something of himself, and it shows cause his father in law thinks lowly of him for not being the bread winner. Literally hate the way Alexa thinks she’s the shit & it’s running off on him to belittle others. Weird situations 🤤

    • @HappyKT22
      @HappyKT22 Год назад +2

      🥴🥴🥴

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie Год назад +15

      I made the mistake of looking at Alexa’s ig last night and the amount of praise these two get is just asinine!!!

    • @AJTheYoung
      @AJTheYoung Год назад +21

      Alexa and Brennon 😬 they are embarrassing imo. Alexa talking about sex every 2 sec and thinking she’s so that. Brennon not even able to form an opinion by himself and go play morality on cole, yo your not he’s dad back off … yikes yikes yikes !

  • @xtuffcookiex
    @xtuffcookiex Год назад +278

    Zay is still immature herself and it shows. We all see how Cole needs to grow-up because, he doesn't read the room or have the best selective words.
    Zay acting like a high schooler is another level of immaturity.

    • @EmpressEllie
      @EmpressEllie Год назад +27

      She’s the living example of Regina George from mean girls

    • @Sough
      @Sough Год назад +19

      It would be one thing if she reverts to high School mode during awkward forced party meeting for the show. It's another that she's trashed him for the entire post-show phase. And lied/distorted so much

    • @nameunknown1519
      @nameunknown1519 Год назад +14

      Maybe their immaturity is what they had in common the most lol

    • @unicornL
      @unicornL Год назад +9

      Lmao but what he said- I mean it is a creepy age gap between Alexa and her stepmother. And her stepmom was like- I'm Alexa's mom. She knew what she was doing lol

    • @MiZZVMN
      @MiZZVMN Год назад +6

      Exactly. The difference however is that Cole is mid-twenties while Zay is over 30. Being the same age as Zay, she’s very immature. I expect it from Cole, not from her.

  • @RoyalRumBull
    @RoyalRumBull Год назад +93

    Said it before during the Livestream and I'll say it again:
    Bartise wants to be friends with Nancy because he wants the benefits of her companionship without the duty of loyalty on his part.
    Nancy wants to be friends because it's a door to the connection with him which she never had in the first place.

  • @paintitblack9712
    @paintitblack9712 Год назад +212

    When she showed up with the blonde hair I definitely thought it was related to bartiste. She is so sweet, really hope she finds someone worthy to be her partner

    • @janaiahalexandre7577
      @janaiahalexandre7577 Год назад +12

      So glad I’m not the only one who noticed

    • @DanjaundTom
      @DanjaundTom Год назад +3

      I just thought it looked nice.
      Everyone also thought my hair Color change was due to my partners taste but I had my very own reasons 😂

    • @infringedblue
      @infringedblue Год назад +9

      She's a sweetheart. I just wish she would work on her attachment issues as Dr. Steph pointed out. The fact she still has businesses with her ex... I have hopes that she will have her happy ever after once she realises she is good on her own too

    • @nameunknown1519
      @nameunknown1519 Год назад +3

      I was just watching another therapist reacts of the season where she said that line about Raven and it clicked that she probably changed her hair for Bartise. It just adds another layer of sadness for the whole situation for Nancy. I really hope she heals from whatever keeps her hanging onto tumultuous past relationships.

  • @purplesky110
    @purplesky110 Год назад +108

    It’s funny because during the reunion and during the interviews Z says Cole never attempted to speak to her and yet here he is, trying to speak to her. The lies keep falling and it also shows that her friends knew she was lying.

    • @rachelfrias7220
      @rachelfrias7220 Год назад +28

      Agreed and the fact that she says she agrees with Cole to not start beef or have any tension between them. As if there was nothing she was still holding against him anymore but then when you look at the reunion you see all she does is use her time to put Cole down and talk about how bad he was.
      She contradicts herself so much

  • @kimday8260
    @kimday8260 Год назад +61

    I think Matt is also clearly terrified of going through another divorce, I think there’s a lot of pressure there for him to maintain their relationship for that reason.

    • @StephAnya
      @StephAnya  Год назад +15

      That’s a great point

  • @lolaneptune7593
    @lolaneptune7593 Год назад +93

    It was hilarious because bartise was offended when she denied him but he was saying he wasn’t interested in her right before that event 😂😂😂😂

    • @Onelovericaa
      @Onelovericaa Год назад +17

      Righttttt! He literally sat and tld all the guys tht he is nt attracted to her and doesn’t even like her.. he was jus hot cause she crushed tht baby ego of his 🤣🤣

    • @G0dismabestfren
      @G0dismabestfren Год назад +5

      Yeah. Narcissists would say that. Even him being upset at her rejecting him is another sign. He didn't care about her feelings he just wanted someone around to have fun with. He was even trying to tell her not to listen to anyone else that it's just between him and her. I've heard or seen this behaviour myself from a man who has narcissist traits.

  • @unicornL
    @unicornL Год назад +75

    I think Colleen is scared to leave Matt and acknowledge that public perception was accurate

  • @thatukrainianjew
    @thatukrainianjew Год назад +33

    Cole seems very genuine to me, someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. Like other commenters here, I believe he is possibly an ADHD-er. The research supports a number of things that would account for his communication style, which strikes non-ADHD folk as odd or malicious. He says what’s in his head without regard for social norms in mainstream circles, and he doesn’t get why it comes off as strange to people who do subscribe to those norms. And it’s so fucking frustrating that they won’t clearly explain it to him or approach him with a modicum of curiosity around his side of a situation or his intentions behind his words. There is emergent research to support that neurodivergent (autistic, specifically, but ADHD and Autism fall under the same ‘neurodivergent’ umbrella) people have very different communication styles from neurotypical people (those who are not autistic or ADHD and readily seem to adapt to and adopt more mainstream social norms). Further, the research shows significant misunderstandings between neurotypical and neurodivergent folks. What could’ve been a chance to grow and connect was manipulated by producers to be peak drama. Entertaining but with little possibility for positive growth.
    That said, I liked watching your thoughtful analysis!

  • @jakes3799
    @jakes3799 Год назад +102

    I would not characterize what Cole did with Alexa's mom as flirting. He was just trying to give her a compliment, but doing it in a very stupid and inappropriate way.

  • @lullabylicia7090
    @lullabylicia7090 Год назад +34

    It’s refreshing to hear you saw Zay isn’t acting like an adult, that is what my problem was with her throughout the show!!

  • @Brandirell
    @Brandirell Год назад +63

    Nancy is so blessed to have the family that she does. We all need loves ones that’ll keep it real with us. No matter how much the truth hurts.

  • @mufasa37
    @mufasa37 Год назад +116

    Listening to Brennan talk is like watching a coat of paint dry.

  • @erionaw9883
    @erionaw9883 Год назад +99

    Nancy and bartise where friends with benefits you can tell they went back to each other after the wedding Nancy wasn’t healed all the way yet .

    • @tea6306
      @tea6306 Год назад +8

      Ding ding ding!!!! So obvious & Bartise knows she's hooked that's why he goes along with it. He realized early on, no matter what he does/says, a sweet compliment (w/ an undertone of a put down) & Nancy's back.

  • @realprissygrl
    @realprissygrl Год назад +100

    girl what do you get out of a friendship with a literal barstool

  • @matariki9818
    @matariki9818 Год назад +58

    Nancy's bro needs to be a consultant on this show : he knows when to call people out on their bs and when to be caring and supportive and to who. I was expecting the typical macho latino type but from what we see he is such an amazing sensitive guy, glad Nancy has him in his life.

  • @jasminkoiv
    @jasminkoiv Год назад +13

    I love these videos! I feel like they make me understand more why I'm feeling uncomfortable or some type of way about people's behaviour, like with Zanab. When I first watched the show, there was something that bothered me but I didn't know how to put it into words. Then you explained Zay and Cole's interactions and I totally got what it was that had me bothered.

  • @Unfortunateaccident
    @Unfortunateaccident Год назад +30

    I hope you also cover Raven's tell all interview

  • @gabiluch87
    @gabiluch87 Год назад +52

    Hey Steph love your videos!
    About Raven's conversation with her friend, I'm pretty sure that the producers where the ones prompting her friend to ask her those questions to get the answers on camera. You can tell just how the situation is set up with the cameras and all... These shows are scripted, not in the way we are used to with fiction, but situations are put together in a way that it is very carefully set in motion by production. It can go from actively prompting questions they know are gonna result in arguments, pushing certain buttons to elicit emotions from them, and we even have allegations of encouraging alcohol consumption with little to no food available.
    I will not get tired of saying this, the producers in this show are the most manipulative a holes I've ever seen... They knew SK was cheating and lying to Raven and covered his ass. That's so insanely abusive, if I was Raven I'd sue them.

    • @helen_writer
      @helen_writer Год назад +17

      I completely agree. Just by watching the Raven tell all on Nick Vials podcast, I could way more about her personality than the edit the Love Is Blind show gave her. Raven answered all the questions I had about the timeline of all the SK cheating events. My heart went out to her, I def recommend it

    • @infringedblue
      @infringedblue Год назад +1

      @@helen_writer is it on RUclips?

    • @terickastidbits2342
      @terickastidbits2342 Год назад +3

      @@infringedblue yes

    • @Sdority905
      @Sdority905 Год назад +2

      Yes producers manipulate soo much on this show and also specifically on "The Bachelor" - that is an absolutely horrible show.

  • @jessicanoelle2012jp
    @jessicanoelle2012jp Год назад +78

    Also if Bartiste went on a boat AFTER the wedding and the girls knew about it, I wonder if Nancy hid bartiste from them too in fear of judgement. If you have to hide someone, you need to .... leave

    • @jclyntoledo
      @jclyntoledo Год назад +4

      No she was upset and didn't talk to them during that time.

  • @demelzapenberthy9579
    @demelzapenberthy9579 Год назад +14

    I agree, Cole can make some potentially troublesome comments but I think he appears to have reflected on his previous behaviours and words and still continues to learn and grow. I would have liked to have seen some growth in Zaneb also, especially following her therapy but I have not seen evidence of this yet.

  • @edinscot56789
    @edinscot56789 Год назад +39

    Cole is a Border Collie in human form. He's just hyper, no filter, friendly and energetic 😛

  • @jamie6008
    @jamie6008 Год назад +5

    I really like how you explained that having in ex in your life during the healing period is not ideal but it may be reconciled after that. It makes me hopeful that I might be able to connect with an ex I have that was very upset with the relationship with ending. Actually given his words and behavior that might be wishful thinking but I like the sentiment. Great video !

  • @taurus1647
    @taurus1647 Год назад +19

    Alexa's dad has strange boundaries with her.

  • @_Just_Jess_
    @_Just_Jess_ Год назад +5

    AHHHHH THE ENDING SPOT OF THIS VIDEO! Ha, you hooked me for sure! Love the commentary. ❤

  • @scarlettcruz7054
    @scarlettcruz7054 Год назад +35

    Any thoughts on how Zanab wanted to wear green again because that was the color she wore in her reveal

    • @titlepending1302
      @titlepending1302 Год назад +22

      Like what she initially said play games and being manipulative

    • @parkermaybe9018
      @parkermaybe9018 Год назад +24

      I mean all the more power to her she can wear what she wants and if that’s a green dress that is a source of empowerment for her then go ahead and wear that dress. But to me the fact that she’s planning out all of this to make him all mad and stuff tells me she’s not as over the whole thing as she wants to come off as. Like she talks about being scared to get dragged back to how she felt but then talks about wearing the dress to come full circle, idk it just feels odd that she’d choose to bring that back up if she doesn’t wanna be in that moment again.

    • @tea6306
      @tea6306 Год назад +3

      YES!!!! She did it b/c she wanted to disarm him. Have him go right back to all the feelings he felt for her when they 1st saw each other. I think she still has feelings for him, but knows there's no way she could broch that subject with him. I also think Cole still has feelings for her, but he is completely heartbroken. Had they had a chance to date after a SIMPLE no, things would be different between them. Major sexual tension on that sofa lol

  • @claytonchristensen2586
    @claytonchristensen2586 Месяц назад +1

    At 4:29 you, me, and Nancy's mom all made the same face 😂

  • @BIG055
    @BIG055 Год назад +117

    I wonder if a lot of Cole’s challenges with inhibiting his thoughts may be due to undiagnosed ADHD

    • @steffnic13
      @steffnic13 Год назад +28

      He definitely lacks a filter, but he seems to be bad with it now. And I suspect it’s because he knows he is on the defensive with a group of people chastising him, so he’s nervous and saying wrong things and possibly having a couple too many beers to soothe his nerves.

    • @kimberlyhylton2470
      @kimberlyhylton2470 Год назад +15

      Cole definitely has ADHD

    • @mariella2884
      @mariella2884 Год назад +10

      It's possible, I also think Zanab brought out a nasty edge to him though that cannot keep being excused as immaturity or lack of filter.
      Like the "bipolar" scene was painful to watch, but I do think without her antagonising him, he wouldn't have gone that far.

    • @mimiad397
      @mimiad397 Год назад +20

      @Mariella according to Cole, Zanab brought it up first by jokingly saying "you probably think I'm Bipolar". Not saying what he said can't be insensitive but if it is true then it does change things since throughout the show he was blamed for topics she brought up first. Same thing with Colleen and the deep thing

    • @TheWorthyMuva
      @TheWorthyMuva Год назад +5

      Def has ADHD

  • @trudelulu
    @trudelulu Год назад +6

    the fact that colleen and matt are STILL together to this day is mind boggling to me

  • @crangel2183
    @crangel2183 Год назад +3

    I love how you go back and forth to connect the dots. I just came across your channel today and I’ve watched several videos now. You’ve gained a sub 😊

  • @Rosalynn78
    @Rosalynn78 Год назад +1

    I really appreciate these videos Steph! They're where I go to debrief after getting all worked up from watching an episode or watching something go down.

  • @claumok84
    @claumok84 Год назад +96

    On the topic of flirting, I’m curious to know where my line for flirting is. I didn’t think that what Cole was saying to Alexa’s mom would be considered flirting. Am I alone on that one?

    • @Momo-po5tn
      @Momo-po5tn Год назад +104

      I didnt see it as flirting either, he just sounded dumbfounded and a little unable to read the room. It was more awkward than flirtatious for me.

    • @h3tur
      @h3tur Год назад

      @@Momo-po5tnagreed

    • @Onelovericaa
      @Onelovericaa Год назад +33

      I agree I dnt think he was flirting. I just think Cole needs a little more time to mature and understand his approaches in conversation. I feel once he gets control of tht he will be a much better partner. His good intentions are already there.

    • @WilliamsPinch
      @WilliamsPinch Год назад +38

      Super awkward word vomit lol. Him not even taking into account that she’s the stepmom of the girl that hates him and that she probably hates him by proxy is pretty funny lol.

    • @millievanillie90
      @millievanillie90 Год назад +17

      I don't think he was actively flirting to be with her but he was definitely expressing attraction aloud which is flirtatious even if it's 'harmless'. I personally have a hard time picking up on subtle flirting signals and am learning to see them, but the vibes are there.

  • @mcb1484
    @mcb1484 Год назад +15

    Re: you mentioning that maybe the married couples are contractually obligated to stay married until After the Altar, I don't think that would be a legally enforceable contractual term. Of course, if these folks signed something and *believe* they are therefore contractually obligated without talking to a lawyer, that could explain it... I'm sure reality show producers have written even more unethical terms into contracts. I think it's more likely that they get some kind of financial incentive if their marriage lasts X amount of time. Also, it seems pretty likely in this particular case with Matt and Colleen (and several other LIB marriages), the people stay together for all kinds of dysfunctional reasons.

    • @ceebee8255
      @ceebee8255 Год назад +1

      Interesting take. Even with the SK cheating scandal, both SK & Raven posted the same message about not being to speak on it for legal (Netflix) reasons

    • @deeniesmothers9310
      @deeniesmothers9310 Год назад +1

      It makes so much sense why these two don't live together, but even a couple who don't live together should be on the same page.

    • @mcb1484
      @mcb1484 Год назад +1

      @@ceebee8255 Yeah I am sure there is a confidentiality clause in their contracts, which wouldn’t have the same enforceability/ethical issues of a ‘must stay married’ clause.

  • @AmourNista
    @AmourNista 10 месяцев назад +1

    I'm glad you called out the blonde hair color change... That's exactly what I was thinking when I saw it

  • @asiavera
    @asiavera Год назад +15

    Complete side note, but hair deets?? Looks beautiful

  • @joukhr
    @joukhr Год назад +56

    idk if its bc i have adhd but tbh seeing cole do really awkward things feels kind of like looking in a mirror (when i'm not masking)

    • @TheWorthyMuva
      @TheWorthyMuva Год назад

      Yes I agree he def has adhd

    • @infringedblue
      @infringedblue Год назад +2

      Another commenter wondered if he has ADHD above too. Seeing your comment as someone who has ADHD really makes me wonder about Cole now. And also feel that much more bad for him because he really was so misunderstood

    • @noone-re3zp
      @noone-re3zp Год назад +1

      I'm very confused. Can you please tell me the things he's done that are symptoms of adhd? I honestly thought I knew what adhd was but seeing your comment and someone else's comment now I literally don't even know... Is it the not having filter thing? Like is that a sign? Thank you.

    • @joannacmakuchi4316
      @joannacmakuchi4316 Год назад +10

      ​@@noone-re3zp From personal experience, its the whole rambling thing that's a dead giveaway. When you have ADHD, you tend to go off on a tangent and say the most random things as your brain loses focus or hyper focuses on every single thought. These thoughts don't necessarily come from a place of rationalisation lol. At that point it's too awkward to stop so you keep going.. and going until someone interrupts. Personally, I feel like I speak first and think later because in my head, so many different thoughts are bouncing off of each other at the same time. Hope this gave you more clarity, I'm sure different people might have different explanations according to their personal experiences :)

    • @noone-re3zp
      @noone-re3zp Год назад +2

      @@joannacmakuchi4316 This is honestly so helpful... I never that could be a symptom of ADHD. Don't worry I'm not gonna go around diagnosing people with adhd haha. Thank you for replying!

  • @TheGracefulGlowup
    @TheGracefulGlowup Год назад +2

    Omg love this video and your channel! This was extremely insightful honestly.

  • @ask4theupgrade359
    @ask4theupgrade359 Год назад +11

    Nancy went into the real estate business with her ex before Baptise. We all have a pattern. I’m usually friends with people first, so I’m good a salvaging a friendship in most cases

  • @halitst1
    @halitst1 Год назад +1

    I noticed the blonde hair, too! I can relate with Nancy, a lot. I have had to let go of not being the ‘chosen one’. If you have abandonment issues, men like Bartise are magnets to women with abandonment issues. It creates codependency that can last many years because he will never choose her but act as though he will.
    Through therapy I have learned to choose myself.
    Btw, I love Nancy’s family. Especially her brother, he is awesome and real.

  • @elizabethvictoria777
    @elizabethvictoria777 Год назад +3

    First, love you! I love how you can see all sides. Love all your videos and how you break it down.

  • @lynetterobinson2681
    @lynetterobinson2681 10 месяцев назад +1

    I'm not faulting Cole for his interaction with Alexa's stepmom, stepmom obviously intentionally walked up (repeatedly) saying 'I'm her Mom' looking for such a reaction. I don't even think stepmom had an active role in raising Alexa to have the honorary title of Mom so she 100% does it just to get a reaction and she got it.

  • @picassojulien899
    @picassojulien899 Год назад +13

    Im surprised you didn’t go into detail on brennon and cole interactions. Brennon is so sad as a man.

  • @yhineidy131
    @yhineidy131 Год назад +6

    I can relate to Nancy. After ending things with my first boyfriend, I was still talking to him and he was taking advantage of me. I stopped talking to him because my boyfriend at the time didn't like that I was still talking to him. My last boyfriend and I talked about staying friends after breaking up. I feel like I made the right decision by cutting off communication because I was afraid he still had hope we could get back together again.

  • @CharisMaggieTV
    @CharisMaggieTV Год назад

    How do you get to screen recording clips from the shows without getting a black screen? 🤔

  • @therealdaneidan
    @therealdaneidan Год назад +56

    I love these reviews!!!! Team Cole he didn't need all that smoke he got 🙄

  • @senselesschanify
    @senselesschanify Год назад +4

    Cole doesn’t seem like he wants to filter himself. He only says it’s difficult to him to filter but he doesn’t ever try to. He could just wait a minute and try to put himself in Alexa or her stepmom’s shoes. I saw 3 steps. First he was initially surprised by who her stepmom was. I get it and she even introducing herself as her mom to get them. It wasn’t impolite yet and she initiated it jokingly. Then he explains why he was surprised which is obviously her age. In insisting it’s due to her age he further makes the situation awkward, more so comparing her to his mom. We get it Cole. I guess him calling her beautiful was to smooth the awkward vibes but in doing so in the way he did it comes off as “you are so young AND beautiful, why are you Alex’s stepmom”.
    Also in his interviews he just always justifies himself as “yeah , I’m just like that” and I get it. He got a lot of hate initially and I guess it’s him being defensive but he does not appear to even try. He’s like “yeah, I am sloppy and borderline impolite but that’s the way I am. When you find it offensive it’s your thing because I know I am a friendly dude. Look I am this, I am that” and the most annoying thing he tends to say “look, I am a dude. Dudes are like this and that and woman are bla bla but yeah I can see that maybe she as a woman sees that this way but that’s crazy and yeah I know how I meant it. Maybe as a dude I don’t get it.”
    but his actions appear to lean to the impolite end (even though he doesn’t realise it). In this particular scene I, as a viewer felt uncomfortable, you can see Alexa’ stepmom felt uncomfortable and Bartise also read the situation the way most of the viewers read. So apparently Cole lacks the ability to align his actions with what is considerate adequate by common sense of the wide amount of people.
    I imagine it to be hard for him but I think it isn’t that hard to be learnt if you are among people, read them/ listen to them and try to put yourself in their shoes.

    • @senselesschanify
      @senselesschanify Год назад +2

      I guess that’s one of the reasons the others picked Zanabs side so quickly as she reads people. I guess she assimilates/ tells the way she feels the others would listen and believe her. I don’t think she does that purposely.
      But her lack of self awareness ist shocking.
      The scene is not in this video yet but when she comments the couch scene in ATA she appears to still be attracted to Cole but angry that he rejected her.
      Furthermore as Zanab is a person who reads people and vibes and as Cole does nothing of that sort we can once again see how unfit they are for each other. I think both dates outside their boxes. Like the person/ personality traits they wish they were / they had more. But in reality they were to different in their needs and emotional capacities.

  • @teamlovepanda
    @teamlovepanda Год назад +4

    Drop it now.🤣 I was so excited until I saw it was a preview

  • @AshleyRodriguez-xo4gg
    @AshleyRodriguez-xo4gg Год назад +1

    I would love to see your review of Ginny and Georgia! There’s so much to unpack about family dynamics and romantic relationships

  • @h3tur
    @h3tur Год назад +30

    i don’t think you should be friends with exes unless you have kids together (varies from situation to situation)…

    • @Momo-po5tn
      @Momo-po5tn Год назад +6

      I agree

    • @realprissygrl
      @realprissygrl Год назад +6

      right bc if we’re sooo cool, why aren’t we together?

  • @astukas68
    @astukas68 Год назад +2

    Would like to see you thoughts about “Below the deck sailing yacht”. Would be interesting to see professionals view of team work and relationships in those conditions.

  • @downtomarsaudio
    @downtomarsaudio Год назад +1

    You are so insightful and fun to watch! Thanks :)

  • @Moi_81
    @Moi_81 Год назад +1

    I like how Nancy's family knows how to ask the right questions.

  • @thobilembuli8571
    @thobilembuli8571 Год назад +11

    Yoh. Nancy and Bartise? To think a 25 year old is playing this 32 year old so much? Can’t! It’s so sad!

  • @ohwow851
    @ohwow851 Год назад +1

    i just saw ur review of 'after the alter: part 1' 🤣 this is perfect timing

  • @Elena-pc7fy
    @Elena-pc7fy Год назад +1

    I would love a video where you break down the newest season of the ultimatum on Netflix🙏🏻

  • @Cornflower20
    @Cornflower20 Год назад +2

    Your hair looks so beautiful in this video!!

  • @arwen_2.0
    @arwen_2.0 Год назад +16

    So bartise was horrible too and he had a free pass but Cole has to be harrassed and insulted. It is like watching the movie Mean Girls but inside the Love is Blind format.

  • @Grace_Zandile97
    @Grace_Zandile97 Год назад +24

    Being friends with exes is slippery...

    • @Momo-po5tn
      @Momo-po5tn Год назад +1

      Very much so

    • @Grace_Zandile97
      @Grace_Zandile97 Год назад +3

      ​@@Momo-po5tn it can lead to " on and off relationships cycle "that never ends

    • @Momo-po5tn
      @Momo-po5tn Год назад +2

      @@Grace_Zandile97 yup and you can be trapped in that for months to years. It gets mentally and emotionally taxing. Not to mention it can hurt other people too

  • @mattie_cakes
    @mattie_cakes Год назад +1

    This is my first time watching your videos and I really enjoyed your take on this! #subscribed

  • @maloneaqua
    @maloneaqua Год назад +1

    However popular closure is I don’t think people know how to get it. You are more likely to gain clarity and peace about how something ended by reflecting and doing your own inner work - closure rarely happens because you had a confrontation with ugh your ex, or because you promised to remain friends or even keep in contact with them at all

  • @selmasuleyman9966
    @selmasuleyman9966 Год назад

    Been waiting for this videooooo

  • @rane219
    @rane219 Год назад +9

    Please do an analysis on White Lotus!! Would love to see your take

    • @estelakstro4007
      @estelakstro4007 Год назад +1

      omgggg YAS

    • @Arlece
      @Arlece Год назад +2

      An analysis on a scripted comedy show? I’m genuinely curious as to why you guys would want that?

    • @rane219
      @rane219 Год назад +1

      @@Arlece well because it’s show based on interpersonal relationships and power dynamics. She’s done an analysis on Encanto which is a scripted animated film. Getting a therapist point of view doesn’t stop and end at reality shows.

    • @Arlece
      @Arlece Год назад

      @@rane219 I didn’t know she did that kinda thing too. I guess it’s all examples to us who are watching so why not!

  • @mml0082
    @mml0082 Год назад +9

    Your curls are so pretty

  • @klemenesber9550
    @klemenesber9550 Год назад +8

    Hey Steph Raven did an interview with Nick Vaill. You should watch it theres her POV of what happened with SK. 🤪

  • @alaynajordan8459
    @alaynajordan8459 Год назад +39

    I regret ever supporting Zay, she's so toxic.

  • @mariemoncada6980
    @mariemoncada6980 Год назад +2

    She also said DON'T TOUCH ME during the show.

  • @jnward255
    @jnward255 Год назад +2

    Love your reviews! I would love to see you review the show Harlem!

  • @jeisselima
    @jeisselima Год назад

    I don't know who none of those people are but I move hearing your voice❤

  • @candicemarie2102
    @candicemarie2102 Год назад +1

    love your videos sm, would you ever consider doing any videos on the ultimatum?

  • @jbullets5198
    @jbullets5198 7 месяцев назад

    TBH I find Cole's way of unedited speaking completely refreshing. Too often we filter ourselves to make other people feel comfortable or at ease. How someone wants to interpret something is on them and says WAY more about them than the person saying it. Everything starts with the self. 💯

  • @AlbinoSquirrelgirl
    @AlbinoSquirrelgirl Год назад +1

    There’s a reason people hate Cole and not Bartise.
    It’s the difference between the healing stages of Nancy and Zanab
    Nancy wears rose tinted glasses while Zanab wears red tinted glasses
    Nancy is a genuinely kind person who might also be a people pleaser, uncomfortable and filled with shame when it comes to failure, hides her pain and feels burdensome when she feels overwhelmed, and because of all this very prone to being abused if paired with the wrong person
    Zanab is also kind but mostly self sabatoging, traumatized and has distorted perceptions of reality, and is vindictive and full of rage
    It’s clear that the cast hates the dude who’s partner was the loudest about her feelings and anger
    Was it deserved? Who knows?
    But Bartise lucked out being with someone who deals with her pain and hurt in silence, considering how awful he is as a partner

  • @aboricua08
    @aboricua08 Год назад +1

    Please do a part 3.

  • @wisdomisbetta
    @wisdomisbetta Год назад +1

    I love your videos, especially ones like this when you. I’m not sure if you’ve seen the show Snowfall - I’m interested in your analysis of Franklin and his relationships. I think episode 10 of season 5 provides of good sense of the character and his interpersonal relationships. Thanks for your consideration.

  • @tembelihlechifamba1790
    @tembelihlechifamba1790 Год назад +2

    This has me thinking that this was filmed in between because Cole only saw Zanab at the Reunion

  • @aracelimuniz9396
    @aracelimuniz9396 Год назад +4

    Do they use the same cups every episode?? I see the same gold cups every episode

    • @tamtai5824
      @tamtai5824 Год назад +2

      I think the cups are meant to hide the contents...legally u can't display a product or drink on a show without paying a fee - it becomes advertising so I guess Netflix asks them to place them in the gold cups

  • @ainsley401
    @ainsley401 Год назад +9

    Love these videos!!! Would you ever consider reviewing the white lotus and the relationships in that show? I’m curious to hear a therapist’s perspective

    • @Sdority905
      @Sdority905 Год назад

      Oooh that would be a juicy analysis

  • @DanjaundTom
    @DanjaundTom Год назад +9

    Im in a friendship with my ex but when we got to know each other he helped me through extremely rough stuff, which I’ll be forever grateful for, and we only talked again after almost 5 years so things have cooled down and everyone moved forward with their life.
    In Nancys Situation im All for moms opinion

  • @malvavisco10
    @malvavisco10 Год назад

    Oh, you gotta do part 3, pretty please 🙏🏻

  • @lanatherana157
    @lanatherana157 Год назад +12

    I know Cole is immature, but I feel really bad for him.

    • @tea6306
      @tea6306 Год назад +1

      So bad really!! When we saw him in with his friends & the confessionals, dude looks like what I picture heartbreak would look like. Just want to hug him & tell him everything will be ok.

  • @allymounga4902
    @allymounga4902 Год назад

    I wonder if they see your videos and it feels like your 1-on-1 professional advice to them. That’s so cool

  • @dancingdreame
    @dancingdreame Год назад +14

    I would LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE TO see your reactions to as a therapist to Netflix reality tv show My Unorthodox Life.
    I love your reality check on unhealthy interpersonal dynamics for adult human beings.
    The people on My Unorthodox Life discuss sexuality so openly between family members and friends despite their conservative/modest and religious upbringing.
    I admire this and have never seen it modeled before.
    I watch your videos start to finish and I'd love your perspective! I'd especially love your suggestions of how I can do that with my family and friends.
    Occasionally I feel like they lack boundaries and overshare because they are doing such a 180 from their cultural upbringing.
    It would be helpful to hear what you think they do well; and other-times, when they/we should draw the line.

  • @Chilair1
    @Chilair1 Год назад

    Your theme song goes so hard! 🎶 what’s Anya miiiiiind! 🎶

  • @Sososunnyyyyyy
    @Sososunnyyyyyy Год назад +2

    Would love to see you review MAFS

  • @maddyG7414
    @maddyG7414 Год назад +3

    People aren’t giving Bartiste as much crap because he is so obviously shallow and inconsiderate and never attempted to hide it. Cole clearly wasn’t attracted to Zanab yet kept telling her he was. Zanab has some pretty deep wounds that she isn’t handling well, but I think people jumped on Cole because he felt so deceptive as well as tactless. Personally he strikes me as quite immature, and I’m not surprised Zanab felt insecure with him- people who have a shallow understanding of what matters in love aren’t ready for true commitment.

  • @rachelgarcia2553
    @rachelgarcia2553 7 месяцев назад

    As a Latina, these conversations are so normal in Latin families because we have a collective culture where there is no boundaries and no privacy 😂. But I constantly have these kind of conversations with my parents and my parents speak to me like Nancy’s mom speaks to her and I have brothers like her brothers.

  • @Nevernormal790
    @Nevernormal790 Год назад +2

    I think that Nancy has an emotional dependence on Bartise if it makes sense!!! Some people are too afraid to be alone as well

  • @stink..
    @stink.. Год назад +2

    Not related but your hair looks sooo good

  • @BMarie-hr2md
    @BMarie-hr2md Год назад +1

    Nancy needs to be clear what "friendship" means. Does that include sex? No issue if there is BUT what's the motivation? Is it he'll come to his senses and want to be friends with me?

  • @1manlone
    @1manlone Год назад

    I LOVE LOVE LOVE your review of this series, season three's to be exact. It truly speaks to everything I think of and more (one therapist to another). Out of all these couples I think Zay and Cole's "relations" bothers me the most. Like you said there is no strong proof to the narrative going around but everyone appears to be out to bash him. NO he aint perfect by any means but I don't think he deserves better than that. Brennon need to get off his high horse! I think since being involved with Alexa and seeing her family's caliber (if you will) he is sort of tryin to align himself as someone of that lifestyle thus judging as one. I also agree that he is just regurgitating thoughts from Alexa. Anywho, I'd loved to see your breakdown or reaction to Ginny & Georgia (Netflix), specifically season 2. They had some good moments in there to discuss.

  • @hannasophia18
    @hannasophia18 Год назад +6

    I feel like this is such a toxic environment for Cole. He reminds me a lot of myself in a way which makes me wonder if he might be neurodivergent (I'm autistic&adhd). I mean he does act like an idiot sometimes but I think there is such a communication disconnect between him and the rest of the cast where everything he says is interpreted in the worst possible way.

  • @jS-no3el
    @jS-no3el Год назад +7

    Firstly bartise is absolutely not into Nancy and messing with her mental state seems like a joke to him his words and his facial expression don't match and why do it look as if Cole was a bit drunk because of his distorted speech this show had way too much alcohol

    • @erionaw9883
      @erionaw9883 Год назад +1

      They where friend with benefits he like something with her imo .