Avoidant Personality Disorder - 10th Year Anniversary vLog
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
- It's been a while since I uploaded my first vLog about the topic "Avoidant Personality Disorder"
- to be more precise: it's been exactly 10 years.
Since some of you wanted to know if I'm still alive or how I am doing, I wanna let you guys know, what happened in my life during the last 10 years. I also want to talk about the things I still struggle with and about the things, I was able to resolve almost completely.
I never thought this day would come. Thank you.
I was hoping for you to check in someday
hey bro, I want to share something with you. Personality disorders are a result of severe trauma, in most cases emotional. We are perpetually stuck in the same state where we first encountered the trauma as a result of shame of quite unimaginable proportions. As a result. we have developed a feeling of unwanted, inferior and unloved for who we are. To put it simply, we are stuck in that time zone forever. Obviously, in a psychological way. We cannot break that chain so we have developed some fucked up solutions to survive. I must admit, in a very bad way. However, you are doing really good now. It is time to take the challenge on to the next level. You have relived that trauma in your mind for say a minimum of 1 million times. So, you can imagine the mind just believes the trauma to be the only truth. In some fucked up ways, it is true. Because this has been the story of our lives. Reliving the trauma every second of the day.
I just want to add you have fought a goof fight, but don't relax. Take it to the end. By the grace of god, You will come out victorious.
Yes. This is true. And by the grace of God all things are possible.
Oh my god I was just about to watch your third vlog and I was going to comment on it asking for an update... and it's crazy you have only uploaded one 22 hours ago... the world is mysterious
Ich bin heute zum ersten Mal über deinen Kanal gestolpert und habe mir ein paar deiner Videos und vor allem das Update Video, das nun auch schon wieder 2 Jahre alt ist, angeschaut. Ich habe selbst AvPD und habe mich in fast allem was du erzählt hast wiedergefunden. Ich bin erstmals mit 27 Jahren auf meine Erkrankung aufmerksam geworden, kannte da allerdings deine Videos noch nicht. Ich finde deine Fortschritte sehr bemerkenswert. Vor allem dass du seit 10 Jahren in einer Beziehung bist, hat mir sehr imponiert. Ich konnte mich ewig auf niemanden einlassen und bin nun mit bald 38 erst seit 4 Jahren in einer festen Beziehung und wohne mit meinem Freund auch erst seit 2 Jahren zusammen. Das war früher undenkbar. Aber es hat ja jeder sein eigenes Tempo und das ist auch okay. Ich hab sowieso das Gefühl, dass AvPD lebenslange Arbeit an sich erfordert. Auf jeden Fall tut es gut zu wissen, dass man damit nicht alleine ist. Das schlimmste an der Erkrankung war für mich immer damit alleine zu sein, dass einen (scheinbar) niemand versteht und dabei bringt die Erkrankung ja sowieso schon so viel (Selbst-)Isolation mit sich.
Ich würde mich auf jeden Fall über ein weiteres Update Video von dir freuen und hab deinen Kanal abonniert.
Alles Gute dir weiterhin!
Thank you for putting the effort and time into this. I have had avpd since I was probably 13 and well over a decade. I relate to this unbelievably hard.
It gives me hope! Thanks again.
DrKnorr, well done on this honest and open account of this condition and how it affects your daily life. I'm well aware of how much easier it would be to just not bother or to "avoid" doing uncomfortable things as they are so mentally and physically tiring. But on the positive side (if there is one) AVPD can help us to become psychologically tougher than the average person as we wrangle and resolve the dark and murky thoughts that lurk in being perpetually self isolated whether in company or alone. Wishing you and your loved ones all the best in your future endeavours, Cheers from England.
Thank you for doing this. It’s great to see that you were able to build a happy life.
Good to see youre doing well
There is something intersting about the avoidants; Even on their fears of "life callings", they stay pacific and calm. Thank you for share your story in the VLOGS and in this video that you made, it helped me a lot to understand better in my studies about the condition: "Avoidant personality disorder".
PS: If you found some grammatical error, please ignore... I am not fluent in english language (Brazilian/portuguese speaker 😂).
The first time i saw your videos years ago i was able to related to your situation perfectly, they made me think about my problems, i also realised that other people also had similar issues within themselves, throughout the years i visited your videos several times so i could keep comparing myself to them, to try to check with myself if i had change at all or if i could still feel i was on the same situation.
I'm glad to hear that you got better and things are looking up
You look so much better. I'm really happy for you making all that progress and having some amazing experiences, taking control of your life despite your AVPD. It's not easy. Thanks for the video... I'll have notifications on for when you make your next 10 years update in 8 years, 6.5 months from now. :)
DrKnorr, Thanks for this well done thought out video It was uplifting and moving to see your progress and how far you have come, it gives me hope that I am not doomed to this and just seeing visually the photos and hearing you speak rather then reading forums touched me on a deeper level. I have never been in a relationship and seeing how happy and brave you are to move towards want you want inspires me ,Thank you and wish you the best.
Oh wow, I found your vlogs couple of years ago, when I was in school to become an occupational therapist and had to make a presentation on avoidant personality disorder. Now I'm really happy to see and hear how you are doing today and what happend the last 10 years. I had a big smile on my face hearing how great things turned out for you and how much you got to know yourself and cope with it. But I'm also glad, that you are again so very honest and give a real insight that those thinkingpatterns are still in your head and that there are still things you struggle with. I really think you created a great source of help and understanding for people dealing with these thoughts and fears. I wish you all the best for your future!
Makes me so happy seeing this
this is very motivational.
Habe deine Videos vor Jahren gesehen und mir, wie viele andere auch, die Frage gestellt, was wohl aus dir geworden ist, und heute habe ich nach deinem Kanal gesucht.
Schön, dass es besser geworden ist und du besser mit den Einschränkungen umgehen kannst. Deine Videos sind sehr wertvoll: Vor diesem Video fühlte man sich als Betroffener wenigstens nicht alleine und mit diesem 10-Jahres-Update wird Betroffenen Hoffnung gemacht und ein Weg aufgezeigt, auch und gerade wenn man selber nicht mehr an eine Besserung glaubt. Ein schöner Kontrast, auch wenn natürlich auch heute noch nicht alles auch nur "gut" ist, aber besser als damals ist es ja und das freut mich sehr für dich.
Wäre schön, wenn du dann irgendwann mal wieder etwas von dir hören lassen würdest. Du hast wohl den populärsten und meines Erachtens auch authentischsten Erfahrungsbericht zur AvPD auf RUclips. Alles Gute weiterhin!
I think I need my Theresa. Thank you for sharing, its inspiring, hope u all the best ♥️
Thank you for this video, we are in very similar situations. I have yet to break out of my problems but this video gave me allot of hope. I've been in therapy for the last two years for Anxiety disorder/ AvPD / Depression disorder and I have completed my therapy now. The one thing that kept me stable has been weight lifting (power lifting), this quarantine is kicking my ass because I'm now stuck at home slowly losing all that progress. Watching this video gave me hope for the future though, just need to get past this quarantine.
I found out that bodybuilding kept me mentally "stronger" as well. I used to be obese now i'm around 10% body fat. This change helped me in a positive way but It was no cure for my AvPD. Now purely because of my "new" body, people have a complete different Idea about me which is in extreme contrast to my AvPD, and that causes me some problems sometimes. But i'm glad I found this new hobby of mine. It's a spot where I can quiet my head.
But I can tell you, and perhaps you experienced that yourself also, never stop weightlifting! No matter what!
@@JustSomeDude31 Hey, yeah working out is still a main outlet for my stress. In the past 2 years I have made major progress. I got new work, doubled my income. I'm now living on my own, even got a girlfriend. I'm jealous of the 10% bodyfat haha, I'm still a bit fat. How old are you if you dont mind me asking? For me getting a loving girlfriend was a huge catalyst for change.
@@michaelvanbale7471
Glad to hear you're making good progress, keep it up!
I'm 36 now, started working out since 29, I lost 35kgs in 6 months when I started (after many failed attempts at losing weight, crash dieting was the method for me I guess). After that main gaining or staying at maintenance for most of the time works best for me. I tried bulking twice in the early days of the bodybuilding journey but that did not work that well for both mass and body fat, plus after each bulk I had to cut calories for a longer time period wich I did not like that much.
Happy to see that you are able to overcome your avpd symptoms and now able to lead a normal life. Its not easy i can tell and you still did anyway so congrats👍
This video is really helping thank you for taking your time to share your journey. I loved the way you sorted things out so simple, many of the things that you mentioned in this video might work as a guidance for people (and me) who suffer the same things. This was a great motivation, again, thank you.
Thank you for making this.
Thank you for this video. I usually don't have patience to watch videos this long, but yours was just what I needed. And as someone in their mid 30's who just recently discovered my APD, I feel very hopeful. Like you, I can be functional despite the dysfunctional and paralyzing fears and thoughts.
But of all the fears I have in my head, being alone is the worst one.
So thank you. for showing me that life can still be good, though most times it's hard to feel it.
Happy for you
Oh... Knorr. First of all, glad to see you man. I haven't watched this video yet; after this comment, I will. I've saw your videos just at the last week and, I actually was a little concered because of the possibility of you've quited posting. And since you're not, it's great. As you might have guessed, I have that disorder too. Whatever man, can't wait to see this one. I'm extremely glad that you've made another video. Pls take care, lots of loves and respects from Turkey!
Thanks for the video. I wish you the best in your life.
Thank you
Omg ur back. I cant believe i am seeing this 10 months late.
Sorry to hear that you are struggling with avpd after all of that stuff happened. But also thanks for the list. Really interesting but also helpful
I respect you alot for changing. Changing is not easy. Changing a personality disorder is probably even way harder
Omg yes, finally!! Love it.
I just found ur first video and just dropped a comment about the 9 year old comment. I wanted to know if you were doing well.. Wow! What a journey
I cured my AVPD after 4 YEARS and it’s all about diet and psychoterapy I know it’s hard to get psychotherapy but if you take vitamin b1 and the vitamin b group it will minimize the symptoms by giving oxygen to the amygdala of the brain which is the responsible for fears response and the therapy is cognitive interpersonal Alden or sum which is slowly helping you out to get into contact with others “giving u” the abilities.(English is not my primary)
Vitamins b relaxes u by oxygenizing
Awesome, congrats.. Did you take probiotics or anything else other than the vitamin B group?
no but i should of i took probio months after the treatment which helped me gain weight and be healthier overall it helps with serotonin etc but yeah i took only nutritional yeast and fasting some days
Dr.Knorr, glad that you are doing well. Keep the love rolling... and all the best!!
Wow I just finished watching this, this video has given me hope that there is life after diagnosis for AvPD and it over all was very inspiring, no criticism here.
An idea for you: when making friends is hard even after meeting cool people, at the very least write down their name, first and last. This is so that one day in the future, five, ten years from now, if ever you decided to make a Facebook you will at least have your book of names, maybe even with a small description about them underneath it as a reference.
Thank you for making this update video. 'Inspired' is the keyword I use here.
Honestly inspirational, thank you for making this.
What helped my with is is spiritually self love exposure and response prevention
Came back to your channel after a few years and I saw your vLog.
Interestingly your list habit is something I do as well, not per se list making on it self but keeping track of stuff when I deem them important enough.
For example, I started going to the gym several years ago, and ever since I made exel lists of the exercises and weights, repetitions etc. Even kcal and body weight and if I had good sleep or felt sick or not. Everything I write down in this "list".
Even for other things I feel like making lists, like task lists give me comfort, and perhaps a sense of control?
The list you made about your struggles are very familliar to me. Thanks to you I might start making a list about my struggles as well, it's something I pondered about often but my AvPD always made me "avoid" it. Also because there is fear of someone finding said list XD
Hope all is still going in positive directions for you!
Cheers
Very inspring video! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences! Greetings from Germany
This video is so inspiring!! Through watching, i found myself relating to many many things, even down to having an interest in writing lists xD watching how you never gave up in trying to better yourself and your situation motivates me greatly. Your girlfriend also seems like such an awesome and encouraging person. Having someone who is patient, understanding, and supportive can be very helpful and motivating. Your videos give me hope for my own future. Its helped affirm to me that the things i do to try and improve are well worth the effort.
Thank you for posting this. You look great and sound so much better. A work in progress. Maybe you will consider posting again at the 20 year anniversary about how you are getting on?
Hey Great Video! I am glad that you were able to turn your life around for the better and that you got out of that hole! As someone who can relate to you I was wondering if you are now again able to experience joy in some situations. Did you regain the ability to authentically have fun without thinking about yourself too much?
Beautiful Film, very inspiring! Thank you very much ❤️
OMG. You are so cute :) Wish you all the best:)
Definitely inspiring. While it's easy--and sometimes comforting--to find other people who are suffering from AvPD, it's great to find instances in which people have improved their lives. By the way, are you a computer programmer? How do you like your work?
Hey I saw your comment, I'm not the one you asked your question to but as a fellow AvPD sufferer, I felt like answering you.
I used to do game art (which is perhaps comparable to programming in a sense of work place environment). But for me AvPD stood heavily in the way, and still does. I kept raising the bar of my creative quality. This caused superiors or colleagues to give me massive compliments on my work. Even so much praise that they started giving me the hardest projects. And yet I kept raising the bar even more. I never thought my work was good enough and that I would let down my colleagues if the quality was not optimal. And everytime I was asked to build something differently I took it as confirmation of my worthlessness and I tried to make it even better still. Even though such comment's were not negative commentry, just normal work related discussions and the like.
This all resulted in extreme self created pressure and stress, which caused me getting depressed and physically ill because I ignored the mental stress. Eventually resulting in me quiting my job. Haven't been able to work without such stress and not getting ill at other jobs either. I guess AvPD constraints everybody differently.
I hope you have better successes in your life journey!
Cheers
Brofist all the way from the Philippines
I am sick since more then decade but hadn't internet back then till this corona time i figured out my illness is avpd
Hi! I’m just curious, how are you doing right now? 🌚
Ich find's total verrückt, aber ich habe auch jemand Besonderes gefunden. Sie hat mir schon unheimlich geholfen. Und sie heißt auch Theresa. 😄
Lebst du noch?