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I don't know if CoHo consciously hates women, but I *do* think she's one of those people that earnestly believes having a baby is the best way to fix a busted relationship
@@greywalker505 but Lowen calling a disabled/crippled woman a burden (fuck the vow "in sickness and in health" I guess) and wanting to sleep with the husband and "free" him from his commitment to his wife because she's no longer a person but a vegetable makes her the hero?? 😭 I may dislike Verity because she revolves her whole life around a man (or. Supposedly, since oooo what's real and what's isn't oooo) but Lowen is just worse. That man is grieving and in pain. That's clear manipulation.
Had a girl in my screenwriting class say “Colleen Hoover is a master at writing dialogue” as if the woman hasn’t written two character discussing their baby’s balls. Horrendous.
I've seen the "laughing at our son's big balls" quote out of context and finding out it takes place moments before said son dies in a car crash was like getting punched in the face
I remember reading that part and laughing so hard despite the rest of the situation. It's so weird that that's a line somebody wrote. A grown adult wrote that. In a book. For people to read
i find it so funny how colleen hoover's "it ends with us" is supposed to be about an abusive relationship, but she literally writes the abusive man like every other man she writes in her ROMANCES 😭😭
@@laylam9997 2 years ago when I read it and hadn't understood or experienced abuse firsthand, I used to fawn over the book and (not love but forgive) Ryle too. man, I was so stupid :( and I honestly can say that book added to my own abusive relationships.
I told my roommate that I spent the evening eating doritos and watching someone tear apart bad books, and he immediately was like “Colleen Hoover?” and I just died laughing because I knew that we spend time in the same corners of the internet, but for him to just immediately know? iconic
I'm convinced the trope of "man who is incapable of being emotionally competent with women" is contemporary romance authors' attempt to re-create Mr. Darcy without understanding what made him work as a character. Instead what they end up writing are an endless parade of Wickhams masquerading as Darcys
The last thing that baby experienced was his parents discussing the size of his testicles. He prolly caused the car accident to go back to his old save file and get different parents.
the god in their fictional world essentially knew the blatantly unfortunate kid’s dysfunctional as hell parents would inevitably screw him up just as severely as they do each other. so he basically decided to put the poor thing out of his future misery.
I can't believe It Ends With Us is getting a film adaptation with fucking Rafael from Jane the Virgin starring as the male lead. I can't even believe people call Colleen Hoover's books romance. This isn't romance, it's abuse. I normally try to see the good in media I dislike, but I just can't do it with Colleen Hoover's books. All they are is garbage at best, dangerous at worst.
that sounds pretty condescending. That was a person sharing their genuine interests. While it’s one thing to watch a video making fun of the books it’s kinda another to make fun of an individual to their face for liking the book. Maybe that wasn’t your intentions but like put yourself in their shoes for two seconds, wouldn’t you feel a bit embarrassed and frustrated if you were met with laughter after sharing a genuine interest? Idk I feel like that was pretty messed up.
@@haileys5224 So you are such a deeply wonderful human being that when you see the epitome of ridicule, you manage to abstain from laughter? That’s a cool quality but please don’t assume people are built that way.
@@haileys5224 easier said than done! one time a guy introduced himself to me as "Christian Sin" (he's chinese, his last name is Sin, and his parents really chose to name him Christian) and my laugh was so reflexive, I immediately apologized afterwards. Laughter is largely reflexive, unless you're faking it! Doesn't make you a good or bad person, and putting morality on a reflex (like making moral judgment on any feelings you might have) is just going to make you overly-obsessed with self-control at all times. not a good way to live and a possible way to develop obsessive compulsions with time. Not everyone is so hypercritical and hyperaware of their every reaction as to be able to hold back laughter before it occurs. :)
It's the way the entire fandom collectively blames and hates Rachel for trying her best to move on with her life and be happy again after tragedy that really hits me in the gut. They blame Rachel for everything Miles does, as if she didn't ALSO lose her child. Why is it her fault her ex is using mistreating women as a coping mechanism 6 years later instead of going to therapy? Colleen Hoover fans stop being misogynistic challenge (impossible).
Lord above. I hate Colleen Hoover and her books but *_You cannot generalize a community that is 30 members or more. You are factually wrong if you do this and I would like to also point out how wrong it is to negatively stereotype and generalize a group even if it is just a fandom._* Seriously, it's comments and attitudes like this that encourage the toxic 'Cringe culture'. It encourages people to harass others for no reason. You think you're in the right but you're not. You are just as bad as them as you are perpetuating a negative stereotype of people. You have a right to call people out for the stuff you describe but you _cannot_ say the entire fandom is like that as once again, that is negative stereotyping and harmful generalization.
I just finished my first submission for a creative writing class and was feeling a bit of imposter syndrome, and along comes Alizee with more trashy, problematic romance novels to remind me that if Colleen Hoover can get published, so can I. Not all heroes wear capes. Edit: For anyone who cares, last week was finals week, and I made an A in the class. Praise to the Lizard Queen.
hi! as someone who just finished their creative arts degree (in creative writing) you got this!!!! there is much trash in the world but there’s also so much beautiful art and stories to tell. it’s all worth it in the end xxxx
(this being said, i have no idea what i’m going to do with my life but alizee spent 2 hours reminding me that being in your early twenties actually makes you a BABY)
The whole "Corbin said to keep your hands of his sister. Show him some respect." is so wild. They treat her like an object. Like no don't SA her, her brother said not to and you should respect HIS wish. Not like you shouln't SA women because it's a horrible thing to do. Why are they hanging out with a guy who only stops SAing a woman out of respect for other men? It really shows what kind of humans they are if they still hang out with someone like that and say nothing. Am I really supposed to like the male lead when he supports behavior like this?
It's unrealistic to write a creepy old man saying a birthmark on your neck is from being stabbed in a past life or whatever. Speaking from experience, if you have a birthmark on your neck, creepy old men will say it's a hickey. They will ALWAYS say it's a hickey.
I had a job once where I came in with a spot on my neck (because my acne can be horrendous sometimes), and a couple of the men (including my then boss) teased me saying it must be a hickey 🥲 Like bruh I have acne, leave me be
I don't think a person like me could ever make it in a CoHo book Guess that's a bonus of being a mesh of my grandfathers' very distinctive personalities, I shall carry on their legacies xD
Hoover's writing is so??? Creepy 🤢 I hate it. Never touching a book of hers with a ten foot pole good lord. Edit: also I just can't STAND how many times she will say basically the same thing 4-5 times. We get it!!! You looked at each other!!! Move on!!! I don't have the patience 💀
at first her writing style was just meh, and i dont know if i suddenly had a change of heart or if its just this book but i HATE it (edit: i think its mainly this book)
After that whole repetitive bit ending with "I wash my hands. I want to touch Rachel." I got up, said "I need a break" and then added "I want to break Rachel."
The only time I ever TOUCHED a coho book was when I flipped to a random page of “it ends with us” and the MC passed out and vomited all over herself, so her friends were taking off her clothes. She wakes up in the middle of it and thinks she’s being raped. I was like “is this meant to be funny or flunking terrifying?? Because it’s absolutely the latter.”
Ugh, I dated a guy like this for three years. He told me at least weekly that he was too hurt in the past and could never love me. It was almost worse because every time he'd get drunk he'd tell me he loved me (but usually deny it when sober). Thanks for making this video and helping me reaffirm my decision to never read Colleen Hoover
i find this kind of book so strange because everyone does have a story about this kinda guy, and writing/ reading about it could be cathartic but there’s never a good amount of organic growth from the girl to help actually work through it. it’s like the point was to get the guy in the end with no change from either character which even irl isn’t the goal. not saying it’s right but you do want the guy to change properly at the end not just. i guess i do love you. like i think getting the guy and the good apology you never did, in the end of a book could be nice to feel but as long as you know it’s fiction and don’t put up with it irl. that’s why people like angst, but it’s never done well it seems like i would just be painful to read instead of healing because no one grows including you getting stronger.
I had regular hook ups with a guy like this. Thankfully, he rejected me when I asked him to start dating. I was crushed because I thought he liked me, but I stopped talking to him and moved on. People like this need to grow up and sort their stuff out before using others to gain self esteem. Your story sounds like abuse and I am sorry you had to go through that.
I'm just surprised how many entire books she's written based on this. I didn't know there have been so many (admittedly similar) plots that involve pregnancies.
I read abusive rl stine in 3rd grade 😂 I in no way thought that was normal for a guy to act that is why the book was good because it sets your alarm bells off for the characters but they can’t see it yet
As a single girl, I'm INSULTED that a "female touch" would include decorating. I have never decorated, my "sterile white walls" and lack of fruitbowl must make me a single, sad man. UGH.
"I'm sorry ma'am, we've run the tests,,, and I'm sorry to inform you that you have been diagnosed with Being A Single Man Syndrome 😔😔 There have been no recorded cures to date,,, you have 2 years left 😔😩"
@@-kirby-2851 Oh no. As soon as I read this my grey bedsheets turned to a bright floral pattern. Already, I can see my non-fiction books disappearing. What have you done?
did Tate stitch up a man’s hand without cleaning the wound first? Was she so distracted by his angelic beauty she forgot to check his bleeding gash for any debris? How did she make it this far as a nurse?
Honestly, i like the way the prose changes when Miles firsts sees Rachel and the way it becomes so flowery, it really shows how strong he feels about her... but then it becomes so creepy. It's amazing how quickly Collleen takes a lovestruck teen and turns him into the most repulsive little creep.
i can't believe they went from "haha, our child's big balls are so funny :)" to "OH NO THE BABY DIED (CENTRE ALIGNMENT)" in such a short span of time, i feel like i'm losing it
Colleen Hoover took inspiration from some of the worst degenerate romance anime around I half expected to hear the female lead go 'oni-channnnnnnnnnn' in this book
Meek female characters, psychotic male characters? Yup its giving Diabolic Lovers and Vampire knight. This specific book tho, it's definitely giving me Brothers Conflict. Just overall the worst of the worst lmao
Youd be surprised. I'm an avid romance reader (and writer) and the amount of female writers who have severe internalized misogyny or massive pick me energy is ridiculous. For instance I love Nora Robert's but her books are either super awesome and enjoyable or horrifically sexist and annoying.
@Allie K. I can see why youd avoid the genre as a whole. For me, I stick with it because when you find a good romance with good characters and development its *chefs kiss*
@@crumplesnatch3400 emily henry novels are great! the female characters are very interesting and flawed, but are so complex and care about their loved ones. the male love interests are also flawed, but what I love about her books is that the characers LOVE EACHOTHER for their flaws and are always making each other better. Theres also always some other plotline in her books relating to family of some sorts, giving a nice comforting feel. completely recommend.
@@crumplesnatch3400 honestly can't go wrong with Jane Austen, and if you're willing to wade through some occasional shit, Nora Roberts is good. If you like manga Hide and Seek is good, but it is a gay romance and is a little graphic in terms of sex scenes
Im in physical pain Im in Spain The S is silent They kiss in the rain Unironically a way better poem than anything present in this goddamn book. Well done, queen.
It makes me so sad/mad that Colleen Hoover books are SO popular. I fear that so many young people (specifically girls) are going to read the books and then get into abusive/toxic relationships and not recognize it because Colleen Hoover told them that “that’s romance”. When I was 13 I read a romance book that featured an emotionally abusive partner but it was framed as romance. Then I ended up getting into my own emotionally abusive relationship. I truly think if I hadn’t read that book I may have realized sooner that I was being abused.
I had a different experience--I was already in a bad family situation and reading romance books that glorified the abuser made me feel better and made me hope that I could change my family and that they love me no matter how much they hurt me. Yep, I was wrong.
That frustrates me so much, also!! And it's not that we can't have books with toxic partners. In fact, the whole genre of dark romance revolves around really toxic (and sometimes a little abusive) partners. But in that genre, you're usually going into it knowing that it isn't even close to real life! That's its whole shtick! It's like dagger-to-throat enemies-to-lovers. They lay it out so that you know it isn't real life (and often include trigger warnings in the book or on the author website). With CoHo's books, she writes it as if these are all situations that could reasonably happen in real life, which makes impressionable young teens assume that is how real life works. If CoHo wants to keep writing books like this, she has to do better to ensure that everyone who reads it know THAT ISNT HOW REAL LIFE WORKS!!!
@@Feminazi1dc I don't know what world you're living in where kids are not into reading, or aren't reading Colleen Hoover. Please invite me into that world because the less people reading Colleen Hoover, the better. Most of her fans are very young, usually in their teens. If you see her meet and greets it's mostly teen girls.
I think the deja vu you're getting from the stitching scene is from that insane young adult novel where food no longer exists lol. The girl gets all hot and bothered when the broody love interest takes off his shirt to show her a wound or something.
@@abhainn35 I have to admit I would be down for this scenario if the thirsty party was a vampire though lmao. They're like, super awkwardly trying to keep their priorities straight and not go 'yum....' while the other person is like 'F*CKING FOCUS AND HAND ME SOME GAUZE PLS, I'M SURE THERE'S TIME TO BE WEIRD LATER'
as someone who has very little self-respect i have decided that everytime i let men step over me i will think "what would alizee say" and start having a bit more self-respect
There is this girl I know for about 10 years, recently I friended her on Goodreads and saw she 5 stared a bunch of CoHo books, and let me tell you, I couldn’t help but loose some (a lot of) respect for this girl, like I can’t see her the same, I can’t even explain…
Ok. My mom did the same thing when I got my first period. Called everyone she knew to tell them then loudly asked if needed a tampon at a family get together the next month. It happens. Those moms exist.
I had a teacher who was also excited about my best friend getting her period. My friend was really self-conscious, obviously, but our teacher was like "You've become a woman!" Ma'am... she's 11.
@@tonichan89 also that's the messed up part too, getting your period doesn't make you a grown woman you are just going through changes in your body but that doesn't make you any less of a child but some don't see that Gross
My mom was also weirdly estatic when I told her. I think she was mainly happy nothing medical was amiss given I was already nearly 15 when it happened Now when I tell her I have to get to the store for pads she's like: Oh no, bummer :(. And I'm just like: Eh it's just annoying, really :) I'll be fine again in half a week anyway :)
That's awful, I'm so sorry. When I got my first, my mum didn't live with us. My older sister did and I told her. My dad had custody of us but my sister kept it secret and didn't tell either of my parents. She let me tell them myself when I was ready, and bought my pads for me and helped me through
I have 3 months to finish my first draft of my novel. Any time I question the quality of my work, Alizee reminds me that Colleen Hoover exist. Thanks for always putting things into perspective!
I work at a library, and EVERY SINGLE TIME I process the books that people have requested, there’s at least one Colleen Hoover. I try to just be happy that people are reading, but why this?
I love hearing bad book reviews and sometimes the books sound so bad you have to read it for yourself, but you don't want to pay for it, hence checking it out at the library. I'm sure that isn't everyone but could explain a few.
I was SCREAMING when I heard "Alright, Bella Swan, calm down" I couldn't stand the drag of reading her prepare every breakfast, lunch, and dinner in Twilight omg Like why was a third of that book just chores alone
My theory is that Stephanie Meyers saw herself as Bella and since Meyers is a mormon wife and mother she probably was romanticizing her daily life by making Bella just do boring chores
My cousins and I started a book club where we each hate-read a different Colleen Hoover book and present all the worst bits to eachother. I have Ugly Love and I honestly think Alizee is underselling how bad it was.
I've heard about how toxic the men are in Colleen Hoover's books but my god there should be more discussion how just how poorly written these are. Like I felt physical pain seeing that stupid "I and Miss and You" shit.
I have a very similar situationship to the one in this book. (Wo the inc3st vibes) and I think this is the first time I’m realizing I need to leave. I don’t want that ending. I want self-worth. He just keeps pulling me back when I want to let go.
I promise you are better off without him. It may be really hard at first, or even a while after, but your life without him will be so much better. I believe in you ❤️
You can do it! I know it’s really hard. You will feel so much better once you’ve had some distance. ❤ Everything is going to be okay. Humans are surprisingly resilient and I promise you will be fine without him.
I was in a serious relationship with a guy like after 9 months of build up. Let me tell you they are doing you a favor by not changing their minds. I dated this guy for 4 years( I was young and previously traumatized) and it was hell. They don’t magically become amazing partners. Even though they commit to you and change it takes everything for it to resemble a healthy relationship. It was so much work that I’m still recovering from the emotional exhausting it has caused me 2 years down the line. They may have all the reasons to be who they are that doesn’t mean shit when you’re terrible for each other.
Facts re: episiotomies. I listened to the doctor and nurses decide to do an episiotomy and they left to get the implements while I was in active labor with my firstborn. It was quiet and I just caught little bits of it. No one spoke directly to me about it. My daughter came into the world while they were gone, and a single nurse was there to catch the baby. When the doctor came back, she wordlessly started setting up her tray for the episiotomy, and the nurse had to get her attention to point out that she was holding my baby. I was 20 years old, in pain, numb from the waist down, and hadn’t had the guts to speak up, but it shook me that they were preparing to cut me open without my consent when I was fully conscious and capable of making decisions about my own body. This was in Portland, OR in 2006.
Um…it doesn’t sound like you were aware or sound. Sometimes decisions have to be made very QUICKLY in medical scenarios. How could they know you would make a sound decision on your state?
@@Animerulespeople It sounds like this woman's perspective of the scenario that _HAPPENED TO HER_ is more accurate than your weird assumption. Were you there? Get a grip lmao.
@@Animerulespeople they don't care about if you are in a sound state of mind. The doctors interviewed me while I was in intensive care with severe serotonin syndrome after an overdose, I clearly didnt even know what plan of existence I was on and they were asking for consent on various tests and I ended up getting the r*pe kit done with no idea what was happening to me. I read the reports after and they just said I gave consent (I was seeing lizard men speaking ancient tongues...)
@@irradiated_woman8016 lol I’m not saying that whatever I’m saying has to be the concrete truth. All I said was that in MANY cases, sometimes you are conscious but not lucid enough to make decisions. Especially if you consider that this was a period of a lot of pain. And doctors may need a very quick medical decision made. So it’s not UNREASONABLE to think that they made his decision for her because of the lack of time and they might have thought she couldn’t make a section for herself since they may have thought of her as not lucid. I gave a rational explanation to what may have happened, I’m not saying anything is the sole truth here. Instead of telling me to get a grip, learn to think
@@Animerulespeople I dont think you understand the medical decision making process or the criteria that must be in place in order to cut a conscious person without their consent.
Idk if it's cuz i havent read any coho books, but omg it is so hard to keep track of the characters lmfao. Both in this one and ur last recap of her book, you'll be talking about a character and I'm like wait who???? Idk if she just doesnt write memorable characters or if I'm not paying attention loool
SAME I was so confused like into few pages when Alizee was naming characters at the start of the book. I thought Tate was some man til I realized it's the girl
I momentarily forgot which colleen hoover video of yours I was watching because there's also an Ian in the other one. Still can't remember who he was in either tho lol
I just wanna say you gave me confidence to keep writing my book. I have a not so good relationship in my book but it's pretty clear it's not meant to be like.. a great thing. The fact you point out they can be in books and the book itself can be good is comforting.
Oh, toxic relationships can be very interesting in a story and cathartic to some people, as long as they're not examples of what is normal/ideal. You, as a writer, know what you're doing and how you present your characters, you're aware of the reaction you want from your readership. Go for it! From your comment, I'm guessing you're on your first draft? So let loose! Watch the world you've built burn to the ground because of the bullshit your characters think they can get away with! Care about readers later. Much, much later. Don't limit your creativity.
@@purrgundy Second draft ish since there wasn't good chemistry and the pacing was so off. Anyway to be vague it's kind of... it's a story about the question "what are you willing to give up what you've always wanted" the mc just wants stability and safety. The first "love interest " offers this but is fully up front that it's transactional. Body for safety. It will in the middle seem like the pair are maybe falling for each other but the actual love interest is always around. Trying to gently nudge that what they need isn't stability but change. For them and everyone. Basically it goes from :Oh no not this trope to... oh God the world's on fire what the hell is going on.
@Jayce Bechtol Ooh, it does sound interesting, and I'm sure many people relate to the false sense of security some men seem to provide when, in reality, they take full control over their partner's existence. It can also be a good twist on the love triangle trope. However, it can just as easily go the Hoover way: a fuckton of exposition, one-dimensional characters/relationships, and not enough consequences for everyone's actions. But I believe in your writing skills to pull it off. You seem aware of the mind games in place and how they intersect. Sounds like you've got it all planned out, which is more than you can say about Hoover, so more power to you! And if you ever need the unbiased opinion of a stranger, or if you get published, feel free to drop by this comment section and let me know! I'd be happy to help anyway I can. (Plus, it may trick the algorithm into boosting this video up to reach new viewers, who knows)
Dan Brown writes each paragraph as a separate chapter too...and golly oh gosh the way he writers women...and his self-insert is the biggest badass of all times, and ofc all ladies wanna sleep with him including all of his students. he just can't take a break. It's like a kid watched James Bond and Indiana Jones and combined them together. and ofc there's some racist and anti-semitic stuff at least in Demons and Angels.
The assassin in angels and demons. straight up savage scawy Arab. Added bonus Dan Brown managed to write that before 9/11 and it was trendy to justify the US having propped up Bin Laden in the first place because can't have the commies getting the opium poppies, we got an opiod crisis to get going
I remember getting an audiobook of The Lost Symbol, and omg that one had some dumb, dumb moments (and also the problematic writing of women). I know one part had paragraphs of text describing a drive between two places and I had to fast forward through it. I was kind of astonished to read on the back of the box that it was slightly abridged already. I also distinctly recall that the main character missed some pretty obvious symbols/clues in the story that even I guessed...even though he's literally a symbologist.
Absolutely called out while pottering getting ready for bed 🤣 When Alizee started saying 'Oy you I know some of you put these on to potter around the house but look at the screen right now" you'll be pleased to know I stopped what I was doing and obediently went over to my tablet to sit down and look. Apparently I now obey your commands O Sardonic One! 👑
I’ve never read a CoHo book but after seeing so many of my favorite booktubers rip her apart (and after running into snippets from her books that reveal how terrible the writing is) I’ve decided not to ever read a CoHo book ever. Also as a baby writer who would like to become pretty good at writing, I will avoid it as to not let it corrupt my writing brain.
I actually came across a CoHo book on booktok about “wtf” novels, and I got to read Verity. I hated it, and it made me sort of happy that I pirated my copy… 😅
Last time you did one of these CH reviews I made the mistake of reading the book so I would know what you were referencing. I didn’t realize how thorough the review was going to be and I won’t be making that mistake again. Thank you for your service ✌🏻
I like the *idea* of the poetry thing. A character narrates about his love interest throughout a book and only when he speaks of her or interacts with her does it do that. Then something happens, they have a falling out or there's an accident or what have you, and it suddenly stops. They drift apart, they leave. Then maybe something else happens long, long after, and they reconnect. At first it's normal, but the spark starts to come back, and after a while the poetry bit starts again and it's a nice happy ending. But this ain't it, chief. #1 it requires a little more effort than just having some line breaks to properly deliver the impact and not just make it a cheap tactic. #2 the book is bad and doesn't earn it back. You can't just do it again with another love interest, that defeats the entire part of what made it special to begin with.
Would it have killed the author to make it sound like poetry. Anybody can click center align in micrsoft word, but a good writer should at least know basic poetry. The formatting is cool but if the book utilized actual poetry, it would be truly artistic. Well... if the book was good I mean.
I’ve been recommended “Verity” SO many times because I love horror but the more I hear about Hoover the more the idea of trying to read it scares me…yet I’m still SO curious just to experience it for myself.
You calling attention to look at the text for the people that keep you on while doing housework makes me feel so SEEN. You're my favorite youtuber to keep me company as I get through varying tasks
As someone who was on wattpad throughout middle and high school, this book was SO easy to read because it truly felt like a teenager wrote it. I only read Colleen Hoover books when I need to meet my yearly book goals LOL
Well, I have a degree in English Literature and, while you're not doing an "academic" analysis, I'd say you're still doing a critical analysis. I would classify most of your book videos as doing "character analysis" since you tend to focus on the characters and how they interact. You specifically point out how terribly they're written which is a valid topic; just because the work got published doesn't mean it's any good.
1:10:41 you can be a protective older brother without being a creep. My husband told his little sister that he wasn’t going to interfere in her dating life but if she ever asked him to he would. The only time he’s ever gone protective older brother was when she came to him crying after her ex threatened her and hit her. We are raising our sons with a similar mentality towards their sister.
I'm a teenager, and as I was listening to this book ( I wouldn't buy it so I found an AI audio book on RUclips ) I wondered why I couldn't take her books seriously or enjoy them cause I don't really like standing out. Turns out they are just cringy and I'm gonna have to set a higher bar for romance books as I do for other genres.
I can just imagine picking up the paperback of this in a shop and seeing a little review quote on the back "I just want the step siblings to shag coz it'll be funny, alright" - Big Alizee Yeezy
I’m pretty sure the 43:00 it’s New Moon Twilight when Bella crashes the motorcycle and her head is bleeding, Jacob takes his shirt off and Bella says “you’re sort of beautiful” 😂
Colleen Hoover makes me think of a person who's so touch-starved that a single touch from another human sends them into a frenzy. A real Mary Katherine Gallagher. The mere concept of an aromantic person would make her explode.
Why do all of Colleen Hoover's characters have surnames for first names? Fallon, Tate, Corbin, Miles, Dillon? Rachel really stands out and she doesn't even sound like a person.
As someone born and raised in the same state as Colleen Hoover (Texas), I can confirm that our bar is at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico. That’s why her characters are so awful. These male heroes ARE the good ones in our state 😢
My boyfriend was reading beside me while I was watching this and was genuinely mortified listening to snippets of this book and the in***t in it. He thought it was a bad AO3 novel.
I’ve never been so upset to have the name Rachel :/ Edit: also, can _any_ of these characters meet each other and not immediately jizz and gush about how attractive they are? It’s so objectifying!
I'm starting to wonder if the reason all her characters are apparently incredibly observant and smart detectives is because CoHo sucks at "Show don't tell", so her characters need to tell you everything that's going on and draw their own, somehow perfectly accurate, cobclusions because she has no other way of letting her readers know these kinds of things (Or she doesn't trust that the 14 year olds on Tiktok can read between the lines and need it all laid out for them)
Regarding having sex too soon after birth: After the placenta detaches, it leaves a huge gaping wound on the uterus. It takes weeks (6-8 weeks usually) to heal properly. The bacteria on a penis can cause an infection, which can be fatal. Even if you have stopped bleeding, the wound can still be open. Just leave your vagina alone (or leave your partner's vagina alone!) until your 6 week PP visit with your gyno. Sex isn't worth an infected uterus.
I love how you just casually stop taking about the kitchen scene to talk about your nail story and it's not only more interesting but also such an relief compared with the previous content
Every time I hear someone say they’re a huge Colleen Hoover fan is an immediate red flag for me XD I’ve met several already, and I’m still salty over the death of zlibrary bc of Colleen fans
@@mori6434 Basically, one of them broke the first rule of piracy sites (“don’t talk about piracy sites”) and promoted it on TikTok. Of course, it went viral and the FBI found out.
26:30 sub way doesn't count because subway's bread is legally considered cake. (I'm not joking subways bread contains enough sugar to be legally categorized as cake)
One of my friends loves problematic, romance books like colleen hoovers. She is so caught up in these books being a correct depiction of reality, that any arguement with her is pointless. She had several jerk boyfriends. I wonder why
I read this one & it ends with us - OH MY GOSH i've never been this furious reading books ( other than with 50 shades ) . by the time I was done with ugly love & it ends with us, I was torn between chucking the books out of my window or Burning them !! I will never be able to unread them....
I read Verity even though it was more like a triller the writing and the plot was shameful, a poorly written sex scene every 5 pages or so, more like a cheap smut on Wattpad.
As someone who grew up in a very religious home I'm really grateful for your intelligent analysis of books like this. De-romanticizing the abuse and making it easier to look at these stories as fiction, not a blueprint. You're wonderful.
This video is sponsored by AG1. Use my link to get a 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D3K2 & 5 travel packs FREE with your first purchase: www.athleticgreens.com/alizee
Am I the only one who can't open the link?
get that bag queen
Friendly reminder to get your tetanus shot! :)
have u gotten ur tetanus shot yet lmao
@@rando12349 i can open it
literally every single character's thoughts read like "Oh right...the poison for Kuzco, the poison we chose specifically for Kuzco, Kuzco's poison"
These books took away my believe in humanity
This comment sorta gave me back
God I wish I read this comment before I only had ten minutes left in the video
😂😂 I laughed so hard my sides hurt aahhh
thank you now I see the emperor who needs new clothes as a llama 😂
this is a great introduction ty
I don't know if CoHo consciously hates women, but I *do* think she's one of those people that earnestly believes having a baby is the best way to fix a busted relationship
I think a lot of people think that considering the number of relationships up tend to fall apart after having a baby
From verity I also kinda got the impression that she thinks that women not having/wanting babies is like the worst thing that could happen to a woman.
Why js this "woman " even popular in first place? Her all mc needs therapy or needs to see more of the world instead of settling for shitty incels
@@cloudyyybear
And that's what makes Verity the “villain” of the story.
@@greywalker505 but Lowen calling a disabled/crippled woman a burden (fuck the vow "in sickness and in health" I guess) and wanting to sleep with the husband and "free" him from his commitment to his wife because she's no longer a person but a vegetable makes her the hero?? 😭 I may dislike Verity because she revolves her whole life around a man (or. Supposedly, since oooo what's real and what's isn't oooo) but Lowen is just worse. That man is grieving and in pain. That's clear manipulation.
Had a girl in my screenwriting class say “Colleen Hoover is a master at writing dialogue” as if the woman hasn’t written two character discussing their baby’s balls. Horrendous.
it's fictional stories, get a grip.
@@billy3532 And it's disgusting ❤
@@billy3532 get a grip on these balls
@@billy3532 it's still gross and her writing is still objectively poor
@@billy3532 found colleen's alt
I have a theory that Colleen Hoover believes that emotional abuse by itself is not real abuse
Thats majority of how toxic YA relationships are. After was the same way.
I heard she defends her father after allegedly seeing him abusing and raping her mother (not to mention the thing with her son)
If this is true, which we don't know, then it's very likely that she is a perpetrator of emotional abuse by itself.
Yeah, that is very on brand for her once you do the deep dive...
This checks out. I've met people who think that if there isn't physical abuse, there is no abuse.
I've seen the "laughing at our son's big balls" quote out of context and finding out it takes place moments before said son dies in a car crash was like getting punched in the face
She just has to be trolling
WHAT
TAG YOUR SPOILERS OMG
HUH!?
I remember reading that part and laughing so hard despite the rest of the situation. It's so weird that that's a line somebody wrote. A grown adult wrote that. In a book. For people to read
i find it so funny how colleen hoover's "it ends with us" is supposed to be about an abusive relationship, but she literally writes the abusive man like every other man she writes in her ROMANCES 😭😭
colleen hoover fans talk about ryle in a way that you can’t even tell hes an abuser. it’s insane
@@laylam9997 2 years ago when I read it and hadn't understood or experienced abuse firsthand, I used to fawn over the book and (not love but forgive) Ryle too. man, I was so stupid :( and I honestly can say that book added to my own abusive relationships.
@Booper Dooper yes!!
idk the person i thought was my soul mate and the love of my life became abusive. i related a lot to all the feelings she had for him so much
@@Jessica_Costantini thissss
I told my roommate that I spent the evening eating doritos and watching someone tear apart bad books, and he immediately was like “Colleen Hoover?” and I just died laughing because I knew that we spend time in the same corners of the internet, but for him to just immediately know? iconic
Ask him if he knows the great Alizee Yeezy
Might I recommend the illustrious Krimsonrogue if that's your thing?
Sounds like a better romance book concept
@@heroofthewinds7765 His next video's set to be Colleen Hoover!
This is amazing. You're meant to be, in a roommate sorta way
I'm convinced the trope of "man who is incapable of being emotionally competent with women" is contemporary romance authors' attempt to re-create Mr. Darcy without understanding what made him work as a character. Instead what they end up writing are an endless parade of Wickhams masquerading as Darcys
Yes to everything
Exactly! Less asshats and more actual Darcys!
Haha! Nail on the head.
this is too true, I can't
you couldn't have worded this more perfectly lmao
The last thing that baby experienced was his parents discussing the size of his testicles. He prolly caused the car accident to go back to his old save file and get different parents.
this made me audibly laugh xx
the god in their fictional world essentially knew the blatantly unfortunate kid’s dysfunctional as hell parents would inevitably screw him up just as severely as they do each other. so he basically decided to put the poor thing out of his future misery.
Reload last save?
-Yes
>No.
New Game?
>Yes
-No
OLD SAVE FILE SOBBING
Bro soft resetted just to get a different set of parents. Iconic
"I bought like 5 more of her books" Girl noooooooo! The library is free, don't give her your money. 😭
eh, she can go buy some crisps. my treat.
@@AlizeeYeezy haha, fair enough, you're a generous queen.
@@AlizeeYeezy secondhand is also an option
Exactly!
You know authors get money from their books being in a library and being borrowed? How would it be legal otherwise
I can't believe It Ends With Us is getting a film adaptation with fucking Rafael from Jane the Virgin starring as the male lead. I can't even believe people call Colleen Hoover's books romance. This isn't romance, it's abuse. I normally try to see the good in media I dislike, but I just can't do it with Colleen Hoover's books. All they are is garbage at best, dangerous at worst.
The way I was in disbelief when I found out it's going to be a movie. I hate this planet
And blake lively too like huh 😀
@@thatveryvvitch7225 WHAT
We are in the worst time line in every way.
My jaw was on the floor when I heard about the film 🥲
Some girl in my psychology class was recommending a Coleen Hoover book and I laughed and now she hates me 😂
gosh I hope that girl doesn't go on to try to be a therapist
that sounds pretty condescending. That was a person sharing their genuine interests. While it’s one thing to watch a video making fun of the books it’s kinda another to make fun of an individual to their face for liking the book. Maybe that wasn’t your intentions but like put yourself in their shoes for two seconds, wouldn’t you feel a bit embarrassed and frustrated if you were met with laughter after sharing a genuine interest?
Idk I feel like that was pretty messed up.
@@haileys5224 you just cannot help but laugh when these books come up and you already know the content
@@haileys5224 So you are such a deeply wonderful human being that when you see the epitome of ridicule, you manage to abstain from laughter? That’s a cool quality but please don’t assume people are built that way.
@@haileys5224 easier said than done! one time a guy introduced himself to me as "Christian Sin" (he's chinese, his last name is Sin, and his parents really chose to name him Christian) and my laugh was so reflexive, I immediately apologized afterwards.
Laughter is largely reflexive, unless you're faking it! Doesn't make you a good or bad person, and putting morality on a reflex (like making moral judgment on any feelings you might have) is just going to make you overly-obsessed with self-control at all times. not a good way to live and a possible way to develop obsessive compulsions with time. Not everyone is so hypercritical and hyperaware of their every reaction as to be able to hold back laughter before it occurs. :)
It's the way the entire fandom collectively blames and hates Rachel for trying her best to move on with her life and be happy again after tragedy that really hits me in the gut. They blame Rachel for everything Miles does, as if she didn't ALSO lose her child. Why is it her fault her ex is using mistreating women as a coping mechanism 6 years later instead of going to therapy?
Colleen Hoover fans stop being misogynistic challenge (impossible).
That is actually abhorrent.
im copy pasting this
Lord above. I hate Colleen Hoover and her books but *_You cannot generalize a community that is 30 members or more. You are factually wrong if you do this and I would like to also point out how wrong it is to negatively stereotype and generalize a group even if it is just a fandom._*
Seriously, it's comments and attitudes like this that encourage the toxic 'Cringe culture'. It encourages people to harass others for no reason.
You think you're in the right but you're not. You are just as bad as them as you are perpetuating a negative stereotype of people.
You have a right to call people out for the stuff you describe but you _cannot_ say the entire fandom is like that as once again, that is negative stereotyping and harmful generalization.
@@poppythedogofwonders You're literally making up a problem to be angry about. Grow up.
@@poppythedogofwonders brother what are u on abt
"It's the live, laugh, lovers and they must all be destroyed."
The expression... the delivery... we ride at dawn.
Off to write a short story based on this as a concept!
Preparing our swords, steeds and torches right this moment sire.
You have my axe!
@@seekittycat and my bow!
i love this comment
I just finished my first submission for a creative writing class and was feeling a bit of imposter syndrome, and along comes Alizee with more trashy, problematic romance novels to remind me that if Colleen Hoover can get published, so can I. Not all heroes wear capes.
Edit: For anyone who cares, last week was finals week, and I made an A in the class. Praise to the Lizard Queen.
Congrats on your first submission!
These are the perfect videos to listen to while writing. Constant self-esteem boost.
hi! as someone who just finished their creative arts degree (in creative writing) you got this!!!! there is much trash in the world but there’s also so much beautiful art and stories to tell. it’s all worth it in the end xxxx
(this being said, i have no idea what i’m going to do with my life but alizee spent 2 hours reminding me that being in your early twenties actually makes you a BABY)
sometimes I feel terrible about my writing and then I watch videos like this and my self esteem goes right up.
the way he started talking about rachel within like 1 minute of meeting her was genuinely disturbing serial killer shit 💀💀💀
it gave me anxiety ngl
I just know that Joe Goldberg has read this book
@@rat_enthusiast Yep, thought of him almost instantly lol
I mean.. it's high schoolers lmao. It happens 🤷🏻♀️ The issue is that she makes grown up characters say shit like this too
@@texyp.856
Nah bro if you acting like that in high school you would be put on creep list number one, even if you are hot.💀💀💀
if colleen hoover can get published, then goddammit so can you, comment reader
Im published. If i had a big book display at every bookstore like ch does then maybe i could get sold!!!
@@plspriskathen spill the teaaaa what's the book name :0
This comment gives me motivation to work on that draft, thank you.
Now I want to finally start actually writing this book I have in mind, thank you
thank yall so much youre so sweet :')
The whole "Corbin said to keep your hands of his sister. Show him some respect." is so wild. They treat her like an object. Like no don't SA her, her brother said not to and you should respect HIS wish. Not like you shouln't SA women because it's a horrible thing to do. Why are they hanging out with a guy who only stops SAing a woman out of respect for other men? It really shows what kind of humans they are if they still hang out with someone like that and say nothing. Am I really supposed to like the male lead when he supports behavior like this?
*jordan peterson has entered the chat*
I mean at least its realistic
It's unrealistic to write a creepy old man saying a birthmark on your neck is from being stabbed in a past life or whatever. Speaking from experience, if you have a birthmark on your neck, creepy old men will say it's a hickey. They will ALWAYS say it's a hickey.
I had a job once where I came in with a spot on my neck (because my acne can be horrendous sometimes), and a couple of the men (including my then boss) teased me saying it must be a hickey 🥲
Like bruh I have acne, leave me be
@@emelemred1575hmm that’s sexual harassment and they could have actually gotten in a lot of trouble for that especially since it was your supervisor
I’ve watched the whole video. Every time “Tate” was mentioned I pictured Andrew Tate. Dare I say the story was fun to imagine
Lol! I thought about Tate from American Horror Story
SAME LMFAO 💀
same LMAOOOO it made this shitshow a lil more bearable
😂😂
LMFAO
She doesn’t hate all women. But I certainly feel like she hates me.
I don't think a person like me could ever make it in a CoHo book
Guess that's a bonus of being a mesh of my grandfathers' very distinctive personalities, I shall carry on their legacies xD
Hoover's writing is so??? Creepy 🤢 I hate it. Never touching a book of hers with a ten foot pole good lord.
Edit: also I just can't STAND how many times she will say basically the same thing 4-5 times. We get it!!! You looked at each other!!! Move on!!! I don't have the patience 💀
😂
at first her writing style was just meh, and i dont know if i suddenly had a change of heart or if its just this book but i HATE it
(edit: i think its mainly this book)
she will NEVER be Weird Al - Trapped In the Drive-Thru
i read better stuff on wattpad
@@bambidolly777 ive read great stuff on wattpad 😭 even those x reader stuff. i hate cohos books
After that whole repetitive bit ending with "I wash my hands. I want to touch Rachel." I got up, said "I need a break" and then added "I want to break Rachel."
This made me laugh thank you
Everybody wants Rachel now:-(
You’re absolutely so funny (I’m getting kinda hungry. I want to eat Rachel)
@@maddieb.4282Reading Hoover leads to cannibalism confirmed. Will her crimes ever stop?!
The only time I ever TOUCHED a coho book was when I flipped to a random page of “it ends with us” and the MC passed out and vomited all over herself, so her friends were taking off her clothes. She wakes up in the middle of it and thinks she’s being raped. I was like “is this meant to be funny or flunking terrifying?? Because it’s absolutely the latter.”
I think that was a different book, Maybe Someday cause I did the same thing in a Target 😂.
You've read another book
Ugh, I dated a guy like this for three years. He told me at least weekly that he was too hurt in the past and could never love me. It was almost worse because every time he'd get drunk he'd tell me he loved me (but usually deny it when sober). Thanks for making this video and helping me reaffirm my decision to never read Colleen Hoover
Bestie you deserve SO MUCH BETTER please don’t ever put up with trash men like this again 🫀🫀🫀
Same for a year, 🤪. It fucked with my self-esteem so much and I didn't even realise until I cut him off. Never again
OH MY GOD the drunken confessions are like play book page #1 apparently! glad we got away from that!
i find this kind of book so strange because everyone does have a story about this kinda guy, and writing/ reading about it could be cathartic but there’s never a good amount of organic growth from the girl to help actually work through it. it’s like the point was to get the guy in the end with no change from either character which even irl isn’t the goal. not saying it’s right but you do want the guy to change properly at the end not just. i guess i do love you. like i think getting the guy and the good apology you never did, in the end of a book could be nice to feel but as long as you know it’s fiction and don’t put up with it irl. that’s why people like angst, but it’s never done well it seems like i would just be painful to read instead of healing because no one grows including you getting stronger.
I had regular hook ups with a guy like this. Thankfully, he rejected me when I asked him to start dating. I was crushed because I thought he liked me, but I stopped talking to him and moved on. People like this need to grow up and sort their stuff out before using others to gain self esteem. Your story sounds like abuse and I am sorry you had to go through that.
Felt way more connected to your emotional sandwich absense story than to these sorry ass characters
It truly was a story for the ages
I still haven't had that sandwich 😞
@@AlizeeYeezy Have you had it yet?😭
@@AlizeeYeezy go get that sandwich you deserve it for making such a wonderful video!
A crushing tale of hope and loss, true art, better than anything CoHo could write.
colleen hoover's kink is actually all of her female characters getting pregnant. like what is this about ma'am
I'm just surprised how many entire books she's written based on this. I didn't know there have been so many (admittedly similar) plots that involve pregnancies.
And in Ugly Love she dumps her first bf because she wants a career and ends up having a child by the end of the book lmaoo
The main audience of these books being 14 is alarming
I read abusive rl stine in 3rd grade 😂 I in no way thought that was normal for a guy to act that is why the book was good because it sets your alarm bells off for the characters but they can’t see it yet
Thats literally the target demographic,high school girls who haven't experienced anything in life and will succumb to these fantasies
When I say “women write men better than men”, I always have CoHo in the back of my mind telling me that that’s a lie.
As a single girl, I'm INSULTED that a "female touch" would include decorating. I have never decorated, my "sterile white walls" and lack of fruitbowl must make me a single, sad man. UGH.
"I'm sorry ma'am, we've run the tests,,, and I'm sorry to inform you that you have been diagnosed with Being A Single Man Syndrome 😔😔
There have been no recorded cures to date,,, you have 2 years left 😔😩"
I'm sorry but you don't have a choice
@@-kirby-2851 Oh no. As soon as I read this my grey bedsheets turned to a bright floral pattern. Already, I can see my non-fiction books disappearing. What have you done?
@@crypticcryptid4702 Changed you.
I'm not single but same 😅 The simplier the better 🤷🏻♀️
did Tate stitch up a man’s hand without cleaning the wound first? Was she so distracted by his angelic beauty she forgot to check his bleeding gash for any debris? How did she make it this far as a nurse?
Right, the whole time I'm visualizing the scene I'm thinking, "Did she ever use anything like iodine or something?"
Honestly, i like the way the prose changes when Miles firsts sees Rachel and the way it becomes so flowery, it really shows how strong he feels about her... but then it becomes so creepy. It's amazing how quickly Collleen takes a lovestruck teen and turns him into the most repulsive little creep.
Yeah. The starstruck, ‘Love at first sight’ is a tremendous romance scene when correctly written. The way Colleen portrayed it felt twisted.
i can't believe they went from "haha, our child's big balls are so funny :)"
to "OH NO THE BABY DIED (CENTRE ALIGNMENT)" in such a short span of time, i feel like i'm losing it
CENTRE ALIGNMENT
CENTRE ALIGNMENT 😭
Colleen Hoover took inspiration from some of the worst degenerate romance anime around
I half expected to hear the female lead go 'oni-channnnnnnnnnn' in this book
Which ones?
I mean, the anime alpha bois also does that 'standing over the girl and blocking her path' thing a lot.
Meek female characters, psychotic male characters? Yup its giving Diabolic Lovers and Vampire knight. This specific book tho, it's definitely giving me Brothers Conflict. Just overall the worst of the worst lmao
the black prince and the wolf girl came to mind the moment i read this comment💀
@@beeshika1320 UGHHH EWWW
Youd be surprised. I'm an avid romance reader (and writer) and the amount of female writers who have severe internalized misogyny or massive pick me energy is ridiculous. For instance I love Nora Robert's but her books are either super awesome and enjoyable or horrifically sexist and annoying.
@Allie K. I can see why youd avoid the genre as a whole. For me, I stick with it because when you find a good romance with good characters and development its *chefs kiss*
Can you recommend some?
@@crumplesnatch3400 emily henry novels are great! the female characters are very interesting and flawed, but are so complex and care about their loved ones. the male love interests are also flawed, but what I love about her books is that the characers LOVE EACHOTHER for their flaws and are always making each other better. Theres also always some other plotline in her books relating to family of some sorts, giving a nice comforting feel. completely recommend.
@@aapow thank you so much. I've been meaning to read her books but couldn't bring myself to it for a while now. I guess this is the sign!
@@crumplesnatch3400 honestly can't go wrong with Jane Austen, and if you're willing to wade through some occasional shit, Nora Roberts is good. If you like manga Hide and Seek is good, but it is a gay romance and is a little graphic in terms of sex scenes
Im in physical pain
Im in Spain
The S is silent
They kiss in the rain
Unironically a way better poem than anything present in this goddamn book. Well done, queen.
It makes me so sad/mad that Colleen Hoover books are SO popular. I fear that so many young people (specifically girls) are going to read the books and then get into abusive/toxic relationships and not recognize it because Colleen Hoover told them that “that’s romance”. When I was 13 I read a romance book that featured an emotionally abusive partner but it was framed as romance. Then I ended up getting into my own emotionally abusive relationship. I truly think if I hadn’t read that book I may have realized sooner that I was being abused.
Out of curiosity, what book was it?
I had a different experience--I was already in a bad family situation and reading romance books that glorified the abuser made me feel better and made me hope that I could change my family and that they love me no matter how much they hurt me. Yep, I was wrong.
That frustrates me so much, also!! And it's not that we can't have books with toxic partners. In fact, the whole genre of dark romance revolves around really toxic (and sometimes a little abusive) partners. But in that genre, you're usually going into it knowing that it isn't even close to real life! That's its whole shtick! It's like dagger-to-throat enemies-to-lovers. They lay it out so that you know it isn't real life (and often include trigger warnings in the book or on the author website). With CoHo's books, she writes it as if these are all situations that could reasonably happen in real life, which makes impressionable young teens assume that is how real life works. If CoHo wants to keep writing books like this, she has to do better to ensure that everyone who reads it know THAT ISNT HOW REAL LIFE WORKS!!!
what KIDS are reading colleen hoover? Sorry, most kids are not into reading. period
@@Feminazi1dc I don't know what world you're living in where kids are not into reading, or aren't reading Colleen Hoover. Please invite me into that world because the less people reading Colleen Hoover, the better. Most of her fans are very young, usually in their teens. If you see her meet and greets it's mostly teen girls.
Colleen Hoover slander is always appreciated
It's not slander if it's true!!
28:53 Alizee telling us she's not embarrassed of us and thinks we're all great sounded so genuine, I think it healed me.
More romantic than Miles could ever be :')
I think the deja vu you're getting from the stitching scene is from that insane young adult novel where food no longer exists lol. The girl gets all hot and bothered when the broody love interest takes off his shirt to show her a wound or something.
YES you're right!! thank you lmao
Hungry. Thalia is fangirling over Basil's chest as the dude is bleeding to death from a gun shot. It was so hilariously Wattpad I couldn't forget it.
@@abhainn35 I have to admit I would be down for this scenario if the thirsty party was a vampire though lmao. They're like, super awkwardly trying to keep their priorities straight and not go 'yum....' while the other person is like 'F*CKING FOCUS AND HAND ME SOME GAUZE PLS, I'M SURE THERE'S TIME TO BE WEIRD LATER'
@@asteridshydrangea-jt2hf it's like a leaky caprisun... how tempting
as someone who has very little self-respect i have decided that everytime i let men step over me i will think "what would alizee say" and start having a bit more self-respect
That's the way to go.
There is this girl I know for about 10 years, recently I friended her on Goodreads and saw she 5 stared a bunch of CoHo books, and let me tell you, I couldn’t help but loose some (a lot of) respect for this girl, like I can’t see her the same, I can’t even explain…
Lose* (I'm Sorry it's just v funny in this context to correct u)
Some people actually LIKE shitty books because they're unpredictable and interesting ... ik it's odd but they're good ppl irl
@@jules2291 If that was the case with this girl, why would she 5 star them though?
@@jules2291 who five stars a hate-read
@@jules2291 lies all around
Ok. My mom did the same thing when I got my first period. Called everyone she knew to tell them then loudly asked if needed a tampon at a family get together the next month. It happens. Those moms exist.
I’m so sorry. That’s horrible
I had a teacher who was also excited about my best friend getting her period. My friend was really self-conscious, obviously, but our teacher was like "You've become a woman!"
Ma'am... she's 11.
@@tonichan89 also that's the messed up part too, getting your period doesn't make you a grown woman you are just going through changes in your body but that doesn't make you any less of a child but some don't see that
Gross
My mom was also weirdly estatic when I told her. I think she was mainly happy nothing medical was amiss given I was already nearly 15 when it happened
Now when I tell her I have to get to the store for pads she's like: Oh no, bummer :(. And I'm just like: Eh it's just annoying, really :) I'll be fine again in half a week anyway :)
That's awful, I'm so sorry. When I got my first, my mum didn't live with us. My older sister did and I told her. My dad had custody of us but my sister kept it secret and didn't tell either of my parents. She let me tell them myself when I was ready, and bought my pads for me and helped me through
I have 3 months to finish my first draft of my novel. Any time I question the quality of my work, Alizee reminds me that Colleen Hoover exist. Thanks for always putting things into perspective!
Good luck with your novel! ^^
I work at a library, and EVERY SINGLE TIME I process the books that people have requested, there’s at least one Colleen Hoover. I try to just be happy that people are reading, but why this?
Also, thanks for your service. 🫡
@@andyareyouok OMG WE HAVE THE SAME LAST NAME
I love hearing bad book reviews and sometimes the books sound so bad you have to read it for yourself, but you don't want to pay for it, hence checking it out at the library. I'm sure that isn't everyone but could explain a few.
Omg same here lmao, I am so tired of hearing about her books
Fellow librarian here and I feel your pain
I was SCREAMING when I heard "Alright, Bella Swan, calm down"
I couldn't stand the drag of reading her prepare every breakfast, lunch, and dinner in Twilight omg
Like why was a third of that book just chores alone
My theory is that Stephanie Meyers saw herself as Bella and since Meyers is a mormon wife and mother she probably was romanticizing her daily life by making Bella just do boring chores
@sophiaako7663 actually can believe this as being true omg
“Hey, Sis.” I had a visceral reaction to this. I am in tears. Thank you.
tbh just the fact that the main girl is unhappy about moving away from Phoenix makes the entire thing plagiarism. it's too iconic
I was gonna request the next fifty shades for valentines day but any "romance" books like this will be scratching that itch
I've started 50 Shades Darker!
@@AlizeeYeezy thank you for your sacrifice
@@AlizeeYeezy I reviewed those books for my channel. I couldn't finish the third on camera because it was too triggering. I wish you luck
I was in LOVE with the DaVinci code when I was 14, please tear it to pieces
I was planning to read it.. Is it that bad??
My cousins and I started a book club where we each hate-read a different Colleen Hoover book and present all the worst bits to eachother. I have Ugly Love and I honestly think Alizee is underselling how bad it was.
This can't possibly be self-cafe
Me and my friends tried that a while ago, unfortunately didn't succeed
@@zoeb3573 yeah, where's the barista?
@@reign_issue 😅😭😭😭
I've heard about how toxic the men are in Colleen Hoover's books but my god there should be more discussion how just how poorly written these are. Like I felt physical pain seeing that stupid "I and Miss and You" shit.
i went into "it ends with us" with no knowledge of the plot or anything she wrote prior, i just knew it was popular. you can imagine how that went
SAME. I wish I could go back in time and slap past me so hard the recoil gives me enough whiplash to bring me back to my senses.
@@enyakarkkainen9523 HA the recoil sends water waves rippling through your skull, and thus your common sense has risen once again.
I have a very similar situationship to the one in this book. (Wo the inc3st vibes) and I think this is the first time I’m realizing I need to leave. I don’t want that ending. I want self-worth. He just keeps pulling me back when I want to let go.
I promise you are better off without him. It may be really hard at first, or even a while after, but your life without him will be so much better. I believe in you ❤️
You can do it! I know it’s really hard. You will feel so much better once you’ve had some distance. ❤ Everything is going to be okay. Humans are surprisingly resilient and I promise you will be fine without him.
I was in a serious relationship with a guy like after 9 months of build up. Let me tell you they are doing you a favor by not changing their minds. I dated this guy for 4 years( I was young and previously traumatized) and it was hell. They don’t magically become amazing partners. Even though they commit to you and change it takes everything for it to resemble a healthy relationship. It was so much work that I’m still recovering from the emotional exhausting it has caused me 2 years down the line. They may have all the reasons to be who they are that doesn’t mean shit when you’re terrible for each other.
2 hours of Alizee spitting straight facts as usual, I love your reviews
Facts re: episiotomies. I listened to the doctor and nurses decide to do an episiotomy and they left to get the implements while I was in active labor with my firstborn. It was quiet and I just caught little bits of it. No one spoke directly to me about it. My daughter came into the world while they were gone, and a single nurse was there to catch the baby. When the doctor came back, she wordlessly started setting up her tray for the episiotomy, and the nurse had to get her attention to point out that she was holding my baby. I was 20 years old, in pain, numb from the waist down, and hadn’t had the guts to speak up, but it shook me that they were preparing to cut me open without my consent when I was fully conscious and capable of making decisions about my own body. This was in Portland, OR in 2006.
Um…it doesn’t sound like you were aware or sound. Sometimes decisions have to be made very QUICKLY in medical scenarios. How could they know you would make a sound decision on your state?
@@Animerulespeople It sounds like this woman's perspective of the scenario that _HAPPENED TO HER_ is more accurate than your weird assumption. Were you there? Get a grip lmao.
@@Animerulespeople they don't care about if you are in a sound state of mind. The doctors interviewed me while I was in intensive care with severe serotonin syndrome after an overdose, I clearly didnt even know what plan of existence I was on and they were asking for consent on various tests and I ended up getting the r*pe kit done with no idea what was happening to me. I read the reports after and they just said I gave consent (I was seeing lizard men speaking ancient tongues...)
@@irradiated_woman8016 lol I’m not saying that whatever I’m saying has to be the concrete truth. All I said was that in MANY cases, sometimes you are conscious but not lucid enough to make decisions. Especially if you consider that this was a period of a lot of pain. And doctors may need a very quick medical decision made. So it’s not UNREASONABLE to think that they made his decision for her because of the lack of time and they might have thought she couldn’t make a section for herself since they may have thought of her as not lucid. I gave a rational explanation to what may have happened, I’m not saying anything is the sole truth here.
Instead of telling me to get a grip, learn to think
@@Animerulespeople I dont think you understand the medical decision making process or the criteria that must be in place in order to cut a conscious person without their consent.
Idk if it's cuz i havent read any coho books, but omg it is so hard to keep track of the characters lmfao. Both in this one and ur last recap of her book, you'll be talking about a character and I'm like wait who???? Idk if she just doesnt write memorable characters or if I'm not paying attention loool
SAME I was so confused like into few pages when Alizee was naming characters at the start of the book. I thought Tate was some man til I realized it's the girl
halfway through my script i had a note saying "who the hell is ian?" so you're not alone lol
I momentarily forgot which colleen hoover video of yours I was watching because there's also an Ian in the other one. Still can't remember who he was in either tho lol
Bro SAME
Alizee’s book review videos are just big sister energy teaching me what’s toxic
A good way of looking at it.
I bought this book a few weeks back to pick it apart. I didn't make it past page 11. Honestly good on you for having the strength to do this.
Hate read it. Send updates to friends every other line. Burn it to pieces. 👹
I just wanna say you gave me confidence to keep writing my book. I have a not so good relationship in my book but it's pretty clear it's not meant to be like.. a great thing. The fact you point out they can be in books and the book itself can be good is comforting.
Oh, toxic relationships can be very interesting in a story and cathartic to some people, as long as they're not examples of what is normal/ideal. You, as a writer, know what you're doing and how you present your characters, you're aware of the reaction you want from your readership. Go for it! From your comment, I'm guessing you're on your first draft? So let loose! Watch the world you've built burn to the ground because of the bullshit your characters think they can get away with! Care about readers later. Much, much later. Don't limit your creativity.
@@purrgundy Second draft ish since there wasn't good chemistry and the pacing was so off. Anyway to be vague it's kind of... it's a story about the question "what are you willing to give up what you've always wanted" the mc just wants stability and safety. The first "love interest " offers this but is fully up front that it's transactional. Body for safety. It will in the middle seem like the pair are maybe falling for each other but the actual love interest is always around. Trying to gently nudge that what they need isn't stability but change. For them and everyone. Basically it goes from :Oh no not this trope to... oh God the world's on fire what the hell is going on.
@Jayce Bechtol Ooh, it does sound interesting, and I'm sure many people relate to the false sense of security some men seem to provide when, in reality, they take full control over their partner's existence. It can also be a good twist on the love triangle trope. However, it can just as easily go the Hoover way: a fuckton of exposition, one-dimensional characters/relationships, and not enough consequences for everyone's actions. But I believe in your writing skills to pull it off. You seem aware of the mind games in place and how they intersect. Sounds like you've got it all planned out, which is more than you can say about Hoover, so more power to you! And if you ever need the unbiased opinion of a stranger, or if you get published, feel free to drop by this comment section and let me know! I'd be happy to help anyway I can. (Plus, it may trick the algorithm into boosting this video up to reach new viewers, who knows)
Dan Brown writes each paragraph as a separate chapter too...and golly oh gosh the way he writers women...and his self-insert is the biggest badass of all times, and ofc all ladies wanna sleep with him including all of his students. he just can't take a break. It's like a kid watched James Bond and Indiana Jones and combined them together. and ofc there's some racist and anti-semitic stuff at least in Demons and Angels.
@niya he is published by one of the biggest book publishers and several of his books got made into movies (eg da Vinci code with tom hanks)...
The assassin in angels and demons. straight up savage scawy Arab. Added bonus Dan Brown managed to write that before 9/11 and it was trendy to justify the US having propped up Bin Laden in the first place because can't have the commies getting the opium poppies, we got an opiod crisis to get going
@niya You should watch some of Savvywritesbooks videos about big publishing companies, its scary
I remember getting an audiobook of The Lost Symbol, and omg that one had some dumb, dumb moments (and also the problematic writing of women). I know one part had paragraphs of text describing a drive between two places and I had to fast forward through it. I was kind of astonished to read on the back of the box that it was slightly abridged already. I also distinctly recall that the main character missed some pretty obvious symbols/clues in the story that even I guessed...even though he's literally a symbologist.
@niya how have you never heard of Dan Brown/the Da Vinci Code????????
Absolutely called out while pottering getting ready for bed 🤣 When Alizee started saying 'Oy you I know some of you put these on to potter around the house but look at the screen right now" you'll be pleased to know I stopped what I was doing and obediently went over to my tablet to sit down and look. Apparently I now obey your commands O Sardonic One! 👑
bhahaha same, i was making dinner
I’ve never read a CoHo book but after seeing so many of my favorite booktubers rip her apart (and after running into snippets from her books that reveal how terrible the writing is) I’ve decided not to ever read a CoHo book ever.
Also as a baby writer who would like to become pretty good at writing, I will avoid it as to not let it corrupt my writing brain.
Reading bad books is actually good if you are a writer cause they can be a reference for what not to do while writing a book.
@@alenec actually I’ve never thought of it that way. I should try doing that :)
I actually came across a CoHo book on booktok about “wtf” novels, and I got to read Verity. I hated it, and it made me sort of happy that I pirated my copy… 😅
Last time you did one of these CH reviews I made the mistake of reading the book so I would know what you were referencing. I didn’t realize how thorough the review was going to be and I won’t be making that mistake again. Thank you for your service ✌🏻
One of the many things I love about Alizee’s reviews is how thorough they are. It genuinely makes these reviews far better than most imo.
I like the *idea* of the poetry thing. A character narrates about his love interest throughout a book and only when he speaks of her or interacts with her does it do that. Then something happens, they have a falling out or there's an accident or what have you, and it suddenly stops. They drift apart, they leave. Then maybe something else happens long, long after, and they reconnect. At first it's normal, but the spark starts to come back, and after a while the poetry bit starts again and it's a nice happy ending. But this ain't it, chief. #1 it requires a little more effort than just having some line breaks to properly deliver the impact and not just make it a cheap tactic. #2 the book is bad and doesn't earn it back. You can't just do it again with another love interest, that defeats the entire part of what made it special to begin with.
Would it have killed the author to make it sound like poetry. Anybody can click center align in micrsoft word, but a good writer should at least know basic poetry.
The formatting is cool but if the book utilized actual poetry, it would be truly artistic.
Well... if the book was good I mean.
new game: who said it - a colleen hoover man or an actual serial killer?
Someone make this into an actual game, this is brilliant.
@@ilaydaakmehmet7707 I've got a bad feeling the Colleen Hoover men will be creepier 🥲
I’ve been recommended “Verity” SO many times because I love horror but the more I hear about Hoover the more the idea of trying to read it scares me…yet I’m still SO curious just to experience it for myself.
Read Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier. Verity is FILLED with sex scenes.
@@meherjanurmee9566 oh Rebecca is an absolute masterpiece!! Is Verity a similar story to it?
@@JediJuniper92 Kind of, but Verity has A LOT OF cringy smuts
@@meherjanurmee9566 oh that’s terrifying in itself hahaha
@@JediJuniper92 verity is the walmart version of Rebecca
As someone who didn't know anything about this book, I thought Tate and Rachel were the same person until Chapter 25
You calling attention to look at the text for the people that keep you on while doing housework makes me feel so SEEN. You're my favorite youtuber to keep me company as I get through varying tasks
As someone who was on wattpad throughout middle and high school, this book was SO easy to read because it truly felt like a teenager wrote it. I only read Colleen Hoover books when I need to meet my yearly book goals LOL
i’ve never read this book but considering miles is supposed to be a pilot, do we ever see him actually do his job in this book or did i miss it?? lmao
Getting emotional about not having bread is such a mood
Well, I have a degree in English Literature and, while you're not doing an "academic" analysis, I'd say you're still doing a critical analysis. I would classify most of your book videos as doing "character analysis" since you tend to focus on the characters and how they interact. You specifically point out how terribly they're written which is a valid topic; just because the work got published doesn't mean it's any good.
*"just because the work got published"*
Books like Twilight is evidence of this as well
1:10:41 you can be a protective older brother without being a creep. My husband told his little sister that he wasn’t going to interfere in her dating life but if she ever asked him to he would. The only time he’s ever gone protective older brother was when she came to him crying after her ex threatened her and hit her. We are raising our sons with a similar mentality towards their sister.
Good for you and your husband. That's exactly what brothers should be like.
I'm a teenager, and as I was listening to this book ( I wouldn't buy it so I found an AI audio book on RUclips ) I wondered why I couldn't take her books seriously or enjoy them cause I don't really like standing out. Turns out they are just cringy and I'm gonna have to set a higher bar for romance books as I do for other genres.
Same
Working at a bookstore, the name Colleen Hoover never fails to make me groan
I can just imagine picking up the paperback of this in a shop and seeing a little review quote on the back
"I just want the step siblings to shag coz it'll be funny, alright" - Big Alizee Yeezy
I’m pretty sure the 43:00 it’s New Moon Twilight when Bella crashes the motorcycle and her head is bleeding, Jacob takes his shirt off and Bella says “you’re sort of beautiful” 😂
Bella kinda talks like a male anime harem protagonist
I’ve never touched a CoHo book, and never will. Just listening to read them is enough. They read like professionally published fanfiction. 😭
Please. Fanfiction is much, ten times better than whatever CoHo writes. Y'all need to stop comparing fanfics with shitty books.
@@alwaysrunning234 right I’ve read much better fanfics than this
I've read better fanfic than this 🥲
Ao3 is freaking heaven compared to this
Fanfic authors have the decency to tag toxic relationships
Colleen Hoover makes me think of a person who's so touch-starved that a single touch from another human sends them into a frenzy. A real Mary Katherine Gallagher. The mere concept of an aromantic person would make her explode.
nah, hear me out- aroace people. they would drive her insane and prolly give her a chance to make a book where an 'aroace' person falls for an a-hole
@@icyphrog802don't put that idea into her mind, she'd just write that character so a brooding man can "fix them" with a good dick
Why do all of Colleen Hoover's characters have surnames for first names? Fallon, Tate, Corbin, Miles, Dillon? Rachel really stands out and she doesn't even sound like a person.
The male protagonist from It Ends With Us is called Ryle Kincaid, what an awful name.
As someone born and raised in the same state as Colleen Hoover (Texas), I can confirm that our bar is at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico. That’s why her characters are so awful. These male heroes ARE the good ones in our state 😢
My boyfriend was reading beside me while I was watching this and was genuinely mortified listening to snippets of this book and the in***t in it. He thought it was a bad AO3 novel.
I’ve never been so upset to have the name Rachel :/
Edit: also, can _any_ of these characters meet each other and not immediately jizz and gush about how attractive they are? It’s so objectifying!
You also share your name with Rachel Bloom who is awesome!
I'm starting to wonder if the reason all her characters are apparently incredibly observant and smart detectives is because CoHo sucks at "Show don't tell", so her characters need to tell you everything that's going on and draw their own, somehow perfectly accurate, cobclusions because she has no other way of letting her readers know these kinds of things (Or she doesn't trust that the 14 year olds on Tiktok can read between the lines and need it all laid out for them)
Regarding having sex too soon after birth:
After the placenta detaches, it leaves a huge gaping wound on the uterus. It takes weeks (6-8 weeks usually) to heal properly. The bacteria on a penis can cause an infection, which can be fatal. Even if you have stopped bleeding, the wound can still be open.
Just leave your vagina alone (or leave your partner's vagina alone!) until your 6 week PP visit with your gyno. Sex isn't worth an infected uterus.
Oh gosh I just realized this is the step-sibling incest novel 🫣
WAIT I HAVEN’T GOTTEN THAT FAR IN THE VIDEO OH NOOOO
I love how you just casually stop taking about the kitchen scene to talk about your nail story and it's not only more interesting but also such an relief compared with the previous content
Seeing Colleen Hoover succeeding while writing utter dog crap gives me confidence in my own work.
That “silence” part at about 1:52:15 looks like it was written by gabbie hanna! I died at “deafening scream” 😭😭
You blessed us 🙏
Why does Mile's POV sound exactly like the inner monologue of a dog? Tell me I'm wrong.
Every time I hear someone say they’re a huge Colleen Hoover fan is an immediate red flag for me XD I’ve met several already, and I’m still salty over the death of zlibrary bc of Colleen fans
wait, THEY were behind that?! CoHo fans are offically on my shit list, I demand vengeance for zlibrary
@@mori6434 Basically, one of them broke the first rule of piracy sites (“don’t talk about piracy sites”) and promoted it on TikTok. Of course, it went viral and the FBI found out.
26:30 sub way doesn't count because subway's bread is legally considered cake.
(I'm not joking subways bread contains enough sugar to be legally categorized as cake)
If anyone needs a good chuckle, the german version of this book is called "loved back to life"
This made me look up the Dutch title. Apparently, it's "Nooit Meer" (Never Again), which I think describes her entire body of work perfectly 😂
These are both hilarious. Thanks for sharing.
One of my friends loves problematic, romance books like colleen hoovers. She is so caught up in these books being a correct depiction of reality, that any arguement with her is pointless. She had several jerk boyfriends. I wonder why
I read this one & it ends with us - OH MY GOSH i've never been this furious reading books ( other than with 50 shades ) . by the time I was done with ugly love & it ends with us, I was torn between chucking the books out of my window or Burning them !! I will never be able to unread them....
I read Verity even though it was more like a triller the writing and the plot was shameful, a poorly written sex scene every 5 pages or so, more like a cheap smut on Wattpad.
As someone who grew up in a very religious home I'm really grateful for your intelligent analysis of books like this. De-romanticizing the abuse and making it easier to look at these stories as fiction, not a blueprint. You're wonderful.