Btw with the second girl, the flowers on the desk actually mean something. Those flowers are placed on the desks of dead students. When those flowers are placed on someone’s desk that isn’t dead it means they want them to die.
I didn’t realize that that was the significance of the flowers but it makes sense now! I was going off of the fact that her classmates wrote in large letters in Japanese, 死ね said “kill yourself” or it could also be translated as die, but the fact that the flowers on top of the already massive message sprawled on the desk makes it even more sad and devastating to think about.
Ahh, I love My R! This is what introduced me to Vocaloid when I was going through a really tough time. Yeah, all the characters are her. My favorite theory is that the first two girls, the braided hair and the short one, their "deaths" was that she got over them. She moved past them and overcame them, so her sadness derived from them also "died". She got over the boy, and she got over the bullying. The girl with the yellow cardigan, though, she just couldn't bring herself to get over it. In the end, she ends up just begging herself not to die. The girl in yellow leaves, but.. she's still alive. Our protagonist never gets over this abuse she's going through at home. It just keeps getting worse from there, and finally, there's nobody else for her to "save". She's given up on saving herself. And with that, she jumps. Could you react to I'm getting on the bus to another world, cya! By Tuyu? They're the same person who made Compared Child and Trapped in the past. The song also has a sequel, If there was an Endpoint. I think you'd really like them!!
I do also want to mention the connection between this song and "Diary of Underage Observation" which shows that the girl from My R is actually stopped by the girl observing. It's really interesting and very sad because both stories show different kinds of depression in my opinion. The girl from My R is suffering from very real bullying and abuse which causes her to feel hopeless about life but the Observer feels totally alone. The Observer seems more existential with her depression and focuses more on feeling pointless and alone. It's very interesting and the connections are rather beautiful.
@@HollyAnneThePaganChaosWitchIn other words, the Underage Observer shares the My R Girl's pain and even says "Hey, don't do it, please". Just like how the My R Girl begged one of her "reflections". As far as I'm concerned both of them found a new reason to live.
I never thought about this interpretation but it’s genius. I thought the different girls dying represented her reasons to die but your version makes much more sense with the yellow cardigan girl, that part always confused me
“Taking off my [Yellow Cardigan], watching my [Braids] all come undone, this petite girl, [Short] as can be is going to jump now.” I don’t think they were different girls…
Ik this was 1 month ago but yes it was just her because my r ( the song) is named after my reflection meaning shes talking to herslef telling saying other peoe have it worse than her until she couldnt take it and convince herslef anymore and ended off jumping off the roof
Real, looking back I wonder how I even got out of mine. I was undiagnosed but everyday I was always miserable and every time I often cried myself to sleep. Had songs like these to help cope with the fact. It was scary that an elementary student had this desire to just end everything without fully knowing what exactly is going on with you, all you know is that you're sad. Never knew it was depression until I was highschool
i sadly missed the stream D: but dude honestly this video made me tear up holy shit man 😭 but again the fact you'd take your time and even make these wonderful videos for us like- it means a lot, watching you makes my day a lot better when im under the weather and like, words cannot describe how much im grateful, and of course, you should take breaks if your exhausted and always know your worth really, i hope you have a good day for whoever is reading this & again, thank you so much
Broo, the fact that I could relate with the song. I was always the Therapy Friend and everyone would vent to me, however I never reached out for my own feelings. I caused me to think everything was my problem and I couldn’t do anything about it. I had to get my own therapy. My message to y’all. You’re fine and perfect the way you are.
There is one more detail that i think makes this song storytelling so amazing When the first two girls jumped instead of turning back, it could mean that she killed the reason that made her think about killing herself and decided to keep going, but the third one, she turned back, meaning that this one pain feeling didnt go away, it stayed with her until the next try I love this song, its amazing
It kinda makes me feel sad that English covers of vocaloid songs always get more views (for examples; aishite aishite aishite, mind brand, and etc etc)
At first i didnt like the lyrics because of the main girl invalidating the other girls problems but after learning the true meaning it just made me cry because its so relatable and it feels so weird to see people who understand…
‘My R’ basically means ‘My Reflection’. The song is about a girl persuading herself not to end her life. This explains the ‘Taking off my yellow cardigan, watching my braids all come undone, this petite girl short as can be’. All the people she interacted with was herself. She had an issue everyday and would prevent killings herself. The yellow cardigan girl’s situation was a feeling she never got over. The braided hair girl and the short girl jumped off the roof, with them smiling, whilst the cardigan girl walked away looking disappointed. This could mean that she got over the first 2 problems, but not the last one (got this theory from soul_dw’s comment). This is my all time favourite vocaloid. It’s got a catchy beat yet a depressing and deep meaning. ‘My R’ also can relate to situations people face in real life, making this a sad and possibly a relatable song. Words can’t express how much I love this song. I’m glad you reacted to this.
The english cover of the song was also good. I would recommend the cover from splendiferachie! Edit: And also check out the english cover from Bao the Whale!
I have so much sentiment value that it's honestly hard to describe. Back when I was in a really bad time in my life this song would be literally the only thing that could calm me down. This song is honestly one of the best portrays of how trying to justify your feelings in a situation like this feels.
still love this song. as a kid i loved it so much i downright memorized the lyrics and sung them to myself, it was a bit of a difficult time so, but the message still resonates
So actually I tried to unalive myself many times, and this song helped me to stop just before it went worse. Sadly there was an attempt that went too far, but that was my last one. 1 year without attemps.
Are you alright? Hope you're life is going ok right now, an unknown user wishes you the best, really! From human to human and as a human, you're very brave to let that go away.
It took me awhile to learn and actually understand the true meaning this song, I found this song as a little kid like the age of 7 I think. Even tho I was so young this song made me cry. When I was younger I really got into Vocaloid but I found songs like this, I understood what was happening even from a young age. This song really does represent a different meaning of depression. Lots of people just thinks that it’s because you don’t have a good happy life, your lonely and hate yourself. It’s so much more than that, this song really does really show that you can stop yourself instead of someone having to stop you.
OMG, this song was the thing that got me through SHIT. At one point (when I was around 10-12) this, and a couple of other japanese songs were the thread which was holding me from *ending my life*... And also, I love your thoughts on it! Personally, I still think that it's not about invalidation, but about complexion of problems. Being just rejected is not a reason to end yourself for her (maybe she's trying to justify her inability to end it all at the last minutes), but if you add up abuse at school and home, it crushes you. Even if every reason is small, you can't just subtract one from another in your head. You should understand the amount of problems you have, not just isolating every single one in your thoughts.
The words you said at the end of the video literally made me want to cry because I'm going through depression myself and hearing someone who's also maybe going through a lot as well say something about it and how we shouldn't give up makes me feel like things might get better and it helps to know that I'm not alone thank you❤😊
This was beautiful. I was going through a tough time not too long ago. I would listen to spotify to get over my worries and this song was always on my suggested list. It kept popping up so i just listened to it, it really helped me. I never really knew what it was about, so now that i've seen this, thank you mooshie. :)
11:04 actually i think who saved her was a different girl from another song by the same artist, the song is called "diary of underage observation" anyways thank you so much for this clear explanation, i already knew before watching this video what the song meant, but seeing someone explain it clearly and even giving such a message to us is honestly heartwarming tw, suicide. dont continue reading if ur uncomfortable with this topic this hit so close to home too since ive had suicidal thoughts as well but pushed it away due to the fact that i was invalidating my struggles
Another subtle thing often missed is that each time the girl berates her younger self and offers a reason to be grateful, the next girl's problem is directly related to that reason. She tells the first girl at least she's never been stolen from. The second girl's problem is that her classmates are bullying her and stealing from her and it's implied the boy she liked was intentionally taken from her as well. She tells the second girl at least she has food waiting for her on the table at home. The third girl wants to stop the scars she gets when she goes home as she's being abused.
dude the message at the end made me cry so hard like geezus. dude you are so cool and im so glad i found ur youtube channel, thank you so much for making these videos it always makes my day better
Honestly as a young person with regular suicidal thoughts I feel like your explanation at the end is what I’d want everyone I know and care about to actually understand and know about other people but I’m too self conscious about opening up to anyone in my life so I just deal with these problems on my own The thoughts are relatively small but they might grow overtime
I only recently found this song, and found out what it was about and was basically trying not to cry in school for the rest of the day since it was stuck in my head. I guess I must be messed up in some way since I know all the lyrics to this. They were all the same girl. She was trying to convince herself to live. At least for a bit longer. She was trying to find reasons to live, but then it just all piled up. And she couldn’t take it anymore. So she jumped. Also, a few not-so-fun-but-imma-call-them-fun-anyways facts, those flowers on the short girl’s desk were chrysanthemum. Which symbolise death, like red spider lilies. So basically the people were telling her to die. And, people take off their shoes when they commit in Japan to show that it wasn’t a murder. Imma just go now sorry for ranting-
I’ll be honest, I’ve been having a rough week but when you post your videos happen to make my day. Thanks for making these videos and making my day a lot better. :)
Such a gorgeous song that a lot of people can relate to for there own reasons but it's highly appreciated that you did a video about this I appreciate it ❤
This is the one reaction video i activately aboid watching because i know km going to break down into tears from it. But now, after all the sh!t ive been through, i needed to hear that from you. It actually gave me a small push to guve my life another chance and hope for the better. Thank you, Shooshi.
Since we're KurageP fans now, I would recommend Chururira Chururia Daddadda, Trash and Trash, and Check Check One Two, which are all very good. They also have official MVs which is always nice. Chururira Chururia Daddadda especially though, it's such an interesting song.
1. The MC was taking her shoes off when going to the rooftop. When someone leaves their shoes behind it means they jumped out of their own will 2. Flowers are placed on one's desk when they die. So in turn placing flowers on the desk of a living person is like saying "I wish you were dead" 3. When girls left by jumping, their reasons died with them, the MC no longer cared about what was happening in those parts of her life. When the girl in yellow cardigan left by walking away it meant that her reason stayed alive with herself. The MC was still very much affected by that part of her life. 4. As the song goes, it says that every day a different girl appears on the roof and MC has to talk them against their decision, each time successful. Meaning that all the pains in her life were subdued. When the yellow cardigan girl appeared, MC didn't succeed in persuasion. She couldn't convince herself that this isn't important. 5. When noone showed up on the roof it's like MC didn't care about trying to talk herself out of this. She gave up.
if you go to 5:15 and slow it down to 0.5 or 0.25, you get the storyline and everything, like the bullies and her school supposedly push her to the ground and used scissors to cut her hair short, and they show you all the things that her family is treating her and yea
I genuinely love your videos so much, music like this I appreciate so much and now is a big comfort for me to understand that I’m not alone. I’m shock I how fast I did understand this message and knew it was the same girl, what a beautiful message, another great video.
I missed the stream because of.... personal reasons that make me not wanna get out of bed to go to my computer and I've been feeling.. bad. I had to pause the video when the mv ended because that's when the realization hit that all those girls were just one person. ngl that made me cry a little bit since I.. i guess sadly relate to everything. I really appreciate you making a whole other video to add onto the edit from the stream to explain it more, so thank you. As always, your video helped make my day a little more bearable. Thank you again.
i've been waiting for you to react to my r for the longest timeeee! im so happy you reacted to this because its one of the songs that got me to vocaloid! this video is really well made and I can't wait to see more reaction videos! this song is actually part of an album from kurage p, the creator of the original song, called "Diary of underage observation." I think the songs from this album fit the content you make. Every song from that album has very deep meanings with different melodies and artists. You can find the songs of this album on youtube, many people have made playlists of the songs from the album in the correct order so feel free to check them out and even react to them if you want to. this song, my r, is actually the second to last song of the album. the last song of the album, the main character there actually saves the girl from my r! i dont see diary of underage observation talked about a lot so i hope you can react to some of the songs! anywayz stay safe everyone :)
Thank you so much for covering this song. The meaning behind this really emphasises with my life and how I feel on a day to day basis. The ending message of this video made me cry, it was what I needed to hear and words cannot express how grateful I am to have stumbled upon this video- this channel
I love this song and I usually cry when I listen to this...The last girl to fly was a short girl who took off her cardigan and untied her braids. I think she hesitated to fly in the same place over and over again. So I think that four characters in this video are actually the SAME person.The story always makes us sad..
I could go on and on why i love this song, its so genuine about what its like being suicidal and depressed, i especially love how she talks to her issues, shes screaming at herself, telling herself how stupid she is for wanting to die because of these things, and every time she thinks "this is what i should be living for" all she does is put a spotlight on it which only makes her mental health worse, its such a real look at a topic that most of the time gets treated like a punchline or something that not a lot of people understand in general, such an amazing song that brings me to tears everytime
I love this song so much, even though it's really sad, I typically listen to the English version so that I can sing along, but I am super happy you did a reaction to it.
I remember listening to this song when i was in middle school when i was depressed as hell, i found this song as comfort, a way for me to expressed what i felt at the time. i cried each time when i heard this song at the time but two years from now, listening to these songs many old memories flooded into my mind as tears stream down my face realizing how young i was when i went through all that pain and almost ended my life right there forgetting i have someone in my life i needed to live for.
hello, new here (have seen a glimpse of you in my recs) -- so glad you analyzed this song because it is one of my faves of all time. thank you for the kind message at the end as well.
Omg this song always makes me cry 😭. I used to listen to this song like a year ago but I only listened to it on the surface level of “this is sad I’ll cry to this” but after all that time I truly understand the message and it makes me cry 10x more… Along with that, you should definitely check out the volcaloid songs “Rotten Love Waltz” and “Adorami” by CATTS. They are very talented, the songs have a very interesting story, and I think they deserve more attention.
Watching your videos makes me feel so much better when I’m not feeling the best mentally I can’t even explain how grateful I am. I happened to click on this video and it just made me feel so much better, your one of my favorite streamers/RUclipsr thank you so much and I hope your having a great day or night :)
Thank you so much for this reaction. This song has been with me for 2 years and it really helped me fight with my struggles :) My R introduced me to anime, Japanese rock, and Japanese media in general. Anyways thanks for reading!
This most likely confirmed by song 'diary of underage obsession' as you hear the mc of that song talking about 'a girl who muttered to herself on the rooftop'. These songs are in the same album too, I believe.
Thank you for telling me this... I needed this so much.... I love your videos too you put a smile on my face when I watch your videos like I said I really needed this and for everyone that has depression like me and is having a hard time we gotta keep pushing because someone maybe someone will care if we die
I never really knew that originally this song was vocaloid….huh..the saddest thing is that there’s many people theorizing the R in the song name stands for ‘reflection’
3 days late for this,but this little information is for rewatchers and new/late people watching this as well "Don't do it" This had two wording during the song やめなよ(yamena yo) at the beginning then やめてよ(yamete yo) at the end Now this is where the small details shows... Yamena yo is used to stop someone if they're doing something to another person like "Don't to it (for others)" While Yamete yo, is used to stop someone if they're doing something to you like "Don't do it (for me)" And that just shows that by the end of the song, the girl wanted help, she wanted to stop herself from killing herself
I know most these comments talk about how good this song is and how nice it is that you took the time to read into it and fully grasp how this song truly uses its story to be incredible.... ...BUT YOUR FUTURE SHIRT, WHAT IS ON THAT SHIRT? I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THE ART ON IT, I WANNA KNOW!!!
I love this music both in Japanese and English language, it made me cried so hard when I was watching it for the fist time and realized that she was trying to convince herself and finding reasons not to jump :(
Hi Shooshi ^o^ great reaction video again!! I may have cried along to this reaction because of the song, haha... Could you try doing one of Minami's songs? Maybe "Main Actor". It's a brilliant song and her vocals are great
want to know how this end? "diary of underage observation" its the last song of the album of this song and at the same time is the song that gives name to the album itself
I relate to this song a lot, especially the short girl who is ignored my everyone. I listen to this song and Shinitai chan at school a lot. Call my cringe, but this song brings a lot of comfort to me.
one of the nice details was in one line before the main character "jumps," she says she takes off her yellow cardian, which the last girl had. Reflecting its herself and she wishes she could just ask herself to not do it but she stills wants to. (anybody can correct me on this)
Its not just that one. “Taking off my [Yellow Cardigan], watching my [Braids] all come undone, this petite girl, [Short] as can be is going to jump now.”
hi! i just wanted to say that i just discoverd this song called "Hollowness" it's by a really talented artist by the name of "Minami" she also sang the op to domestic girlfriend if that rings any bells i highly recomend it if you want to cry a little
i sadly missed the stream, but i actually never heard the Japanese ver. but its good, i just watched the english one which is also good just the lyrics subbed differently i just love this song- pls remember that you are loved and never forgotten, your special
Hello, I've been watching your videos for a few months now. I enjoy your content a lot! I've been having a hard time at home and in general because my family invalidates my depression a lot. And summer school hasn't been great. It's been a lot of things. Lately I have been feeling s*icidal.. Your message spoke to me, thank you. I cried, but that's okay. Thank you for that message, Shooshi. Sorry for the rambling/venting at the beginning. Have a good day. Edit: Also, I want to list songs by Siinamota that I really recommend (truthfully i recommend all of his songs) Drug score, nee, Sayonarawoiwazuni, Goodbye Everyone, Q, Strobe Light, Strobe Last, Pallet Niha Kimi Ga Ippai, City Lights, Alive Conscious, etc.
Yo this made me tear up so hard like there is an endless loop of trying to stop yourself from losing yourself from the world this hit so hard. Btw I notice a flower in the petite girl's desk. P.S. Can u react to distortionist or rotary dial by ghost pls.
it's scary to think that I just relate to this whole song when I was 12. this was at least my first miku song, and more to come in the future. This song may speak to other people too, I hope nothing but the best for those people.
I finally have time to comment in this video. I don't want to be attention seeker either. I've been struggled with imagining things to unalive myself. Having PTSD, anxiety and depression since young ages but this song makes me cried because exactly one year ago, my late dad kept trying to jump off the hospital balcony minutes after I listen to this song with my earplugs. My only best friend, dad almost died because of me triggered his 'unalive himself' thought. Thankfully, he died in my arms on August 14 on a wheelchair due to heart failure that he suffered since 20s while I brought him to the toilet. He just closed his eyes like sleeping in a wheelchair and my dumb*ss thought he passed out. At least, he didn't die because of jumping off the balcony or else I'll keep blaming myself for his death. Rest well, my only best friend, my dad.
all of the girls are her, whenever she goes up there, she's talking herself out of doing it, that's why she makes them turn away. at the end of the song she says "Taking of MY yellow cardigan watching MY BRAIDS come undone THIS PETITE girl short as can be is going to jump now and be free" the first girl she talks to is her with her braids, the second refers to her as the petite girl the last one who suffers the same as her is the one with the cardigan, it's her at the end of her line when she decided she didnt want to go on anymore
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woah 9 days ago
Btw with the second girl, the flowers on the desk actually mean something. Those flowers are placed on the desks of dead students. When those flowers are placed on someone’s desk that isn’t dead it means they want them to die.
I didn’t realize that that was the significance of the flowers but it makes sense now! I was going off of the fact that her classmates wrote in large letters in Japanese, 死ね said “kill yourself” or it could also be translated as die, but the fact that the flowers on top of the already massive message sprawled on the desk makes it even more sad and devastating to think about.
Pretty sure they're red spider lillies, meaning death and sad memories
Ahh, I love My R! This is what introduced me to Vocaloid when I was going through a really tough time. Yeah, all the characters are her. My favorite theory is that the first two girls, the braided hair and the short one, their "deaths" was that she got over them. She moved past them and overcame them, so her sadness derived from them also "died". She got over the boy, and she got over the bullying. The girl with the yellow cardigan, though, she just couldn't bring herself to get over it. In the end, she ends up just begging herself not to die. The girl in yellow leaves, but.. she's still alive. Our protagonist never gets over this abuse she's going through at home. It just keeps getting worse from there, and finally, there's nobody else for her to "save". She's given up on saving herself. And with that, she jumps.
Could you react to I'm getting on the bus to another world, cya! By Tuyu? They're the same person who made Compared Child and Trapped in the past. The song also has a sequel, If there was an Endpoint. I think you'd really like them!!
nice niko pfp, it's the same as my screensaver since 2018
@@B2_R1YUZU Yeah!! It's actually my PC background too!
I do also want to mention the connection between this song and "Diary of Underage Observation" which shows that the girl from My R is actually stopped by the girl observing. It's really interesting and very sad because both stories show different kinds of depression in my opinion. The girl from My R is suffering from very real bullying and abuse which causes her to feel hopeless about life but the Observer feels totally alone. The Observer seems more existential with her depression and focuses more on feeling pointless and alone. It's very interesting and the connections are rather beautiful.
@@HollyAnneThePaganChaosWitchIn other words, the Underage Observer shares the My R Girl's pain and even says "Hey, don't do it, please". Just like how the My R Girl begged one of her "reflections". As far as I'm concerned both of them found a new reason to live.
I never thought about this interpretation but it’s genius. I thought the different girls dying represented her reasons to die but your version makes much more sense with the yellow cardigan girl, that part always confused me
“Taking off my [Yellow Cardigan], watching my [Braids] all come undone, this petite girl, [Short] as can be is going to jump now.”
I don’t think they were different girls…
The petite girl was also there
@@Kakakokokakkoukakokakkou
Still, it was all the same person. There wasn’t anyone on that roof that she was talking to.
Ik this was 1 month ago but yes it was just her because my r ( the song) is named after my reflection meaning shes talking to herslef telling saying other peoe have it worse than her until she couldnt take it and convince herslef anymore and ended off jumping off the roof
@@Golden_rose_weird, I’ve heard from other people it was my “Reason”, as in her reason to live, as like in the song
Everything is just speculation. There is no official full name of the song@@NakedWyverns
This song was actually what I listened to during the years where I actually was depressed.
Real, looking back I wonder how I even got out of mine. I was undiagnosed but everyday I was always miserable and every time I often cried myself to sleep. Had songs like these to help cope with the fact. It was scary that an elementary student had this desire to just end everything without fully knowing what exactly is going on with you, all you know is that you're sad. Never knew it was depression until I was highschool
i sadly missed the stream D: but dude honestly this video made me tear up holy shit man 😭 but again the fact you'd take your time and even make these wonderful videos for us like- it means a lot, watching you makes my day a lot better when im under the weather and like, words cannot describe how much im grateful, and of course, you should take breaks if your exhausted and always know your worth really, i hope you have a good day for whoever is reading this & again, thank you so much
Dude thank you so much for this. Fu**ing love people like you. Love all of y’all and hope you’re doing okay in life :’). I wanna see all of you happy.
Broo, the fact that I could relate with the song. I was always the Therapy Friend and everyone would vent to me, however I never reached out for my own feelings. I caused me to think everything was my problem and I couldn’t do anything about it. I had to get my own therapy.
My message to y’all. You’re fine and perfect the way you are.
There is one more detail that i think makes this song storytelling so amazing
When the first two girls jumped instead of turning back, it could mean that she killed the reason that made her think about killing herself and decided to keep going, but the third one, she turned back, meaning that this one pain feeling didnt go away, it stayed with her until the next try
I love this song, its amazing
Unpopular opinion/fact(?): I prefer the original of this song than the English cover, it makes me sad more than the English cover
Same
It kinda makes me feel sad that English covers of vocaloid songs always get more views (for examples; aishite aishite aishite, mind brand, and etc etc)
Same
@@laylathelpsqueen65 yea
I generally agree for most songs but I would have to say that this song is definitely an exception all the English covers our ass other than rachies
At first i didnt like the lyrics because of the main girl invalidating the other girls problems but after learning the true meaning it just made me cry because its so relatable and it feels so weird to see people who understand…
The moment when you realize the only person she is invalidating is herself all this time change it completely
Oh my god same.
Like trauma Olympics is so evil so sorry
‘My R’ basically means ‘My Reflection’. The song is about a girl persuading herself not to end her life. This explains the ‘Taking off my yellow cardigan, watching my braids all come undone, this petite girl short as can be’. All the people she interacted with was herself. She had an issue everyday and would prevent killings herself.
The yellow cardigan girl’s situation was a feeling she never got over. The braided hair girl and the short girl jumped off the roof, with them smiling, whilst the cardigan girl walked away looking disappointed. This could mean that she got over the first 2 problems, but not the last one (got this theory from soul_dw’s comment).
This is my all time favourite vocaloid. It’s got a catchy beat yet a depressing and deep meaning. ‘My R’ also can relate to situations people face in real life, making this a sad and possibly a relatable song. Words can’t express how much I love this song. I’m glad you reacted to this.
The english cover of the song was also good. I would recommend the cover from splendiferachie!
Edit: And also check out the english cover from Bao the Whale!
I have so much sentiment value that it's honestly hard to describe. Back when I was in a really bad time in my life this song would be literally the only thing that could calm me down.
This song is honestly one of the best portrays of how trying to justify your feelings in a situation like this feels.
still love this song. as a kid i loved it so much i downright memorized the lyrics and sung them to myself, it was a bit of a difficult time so, but the message still resonates
So actually I tried to unalive myself many times, and this song helped me to stop just before it went worse.
Sadly there was an attempt that went too far, but that was my last one. 1 year without attemps.
Are you doing okay now? Please tell me you’re alright :(
@@mosseater333 Yup! I'm here. I'm doing alright so please no worries! I plan to stay alive.
Also, nice Rui profile picture ;)
Might be wierd to reply to your comment after a year, but I hope you're doing okay right now! :D
@@alessharu3634 Thanks! I'm doing much better
Are you alright? Hope you're life is going ok right now, an unknown user wishes you the best, really! From human to human and as a human, you're very brave to let that go away.
It took me awhile to learn and actually understand the true meaning this song, I found this song as a little kid like the age of 7 I think. Even tho I was so young this song made me cry. When I was younger I really got into Vocaloid but I found songs like this, I understood what was happening even from a young age. This song really does represent a different meaning of depression. Lots of people just thinks that it’s because you don’t have a good happy life, your lonely and hate yourself. It’s so much more than that, this song really does really show that you can stop yourself instead of someone having to stop you.
OMG, this song was the thing that got me through SHIT. At one point (when I was around 10-12) this, and a couple of other japanese songs were the thread which was holding me from *ending my life*...
And also, I love your thoughts on it! Personally, I still think that it's not about invalidation, but about complexion of problems. Being just rejected is not a reason to end yourself for her (maybe she's trying to justify her inability to end it all at the last minutes), but if you add up abuse at school and home, it crushes you. Even if every reason is small, you can't just subtract one from another in your head. You should understand the amount of problems you have, not just isolating every single one in your thoughts.
The words you said at the end of the video literally made me want to cry because I'm going through depression myself and hearing someone who's also maybe going through a lot as well say something about it and how we shouldn't give up makes me feel like things might get better and it helps to know that I'm not alone thank you❤😊
This was beautiful. I was going through a tough time not too long ago. I would listen to spotify to get over my worries and this song was always on my suggested list. It kept popping up so i just listened to it, it really helped me. I never really knew what it was about, so now that i've seen this, thank you mooshie. :)
No problemo :3
IM HERE ON TIME LESGOOO
"An mha version" 💀💀
I love shooshi's reactions so much 💗💗
11:04 actually i think who saved her was a different girl from another song by the same artist, the song is called "diary of underage observation"
anyways thank you so much for this clear explanation, i already knew before watching this video what the song meant, but seeing someone explain it clearly and even giving such a message to us is honestly heartwarming
tw, suicide. dont continue reading if ur uncomfortable with this topic
this hit so close to home too since ive had suicidal thoughts as well but pushed it away due to the fact that i was invalidating my struggles
Another subtle thing often missed is that each time the girl berates her younger self and offers a reason to be grateful, the next girl's problem is directly related to that reason. She tells the first girl at least she's never been stolen from. The second girl's problem is that her classmates are bullying her and stealing from her and it's implied the boy she liked was intentionally taken from her as well. She tells the second girl at least she has food waiting for her on the table at home. The third girl wants to stop the scars she gets when she goes home as she's being abused.
I used to blast this song in middle school haha, so good. It rests in a special place in my mind
I have heard this song so much that i didn't expect to cry while hearing you talk about it. Love your reactions
damn, that message at the end made me almost cry... it was something i really needed to hear.
dude the message at the end made me cry so hard like geezus. dude you are so cool and im so glad i found ur youtube channel, thank you so much for making these videos it always makes my day better
there’s also a sequel to this song where the girl gets saved! It’s called Diary of Underage Observation
Honestly as a young person with regular suicidal thoughts I feel like your explanation at the end is what I’d want everyone I know and care about to actually understand and know about other people but I’m too self conscious about opening up to anyone in my life so I just deal with these problems on my own
The thoughts are relatively small but they might grow overtime
I only recently found this song, and found out what it was about and was basically trying not to cry in school for the rest of the day since it was stuck in my head. I guess I must be messed up in some way since I know all the lyrics to this. They were all the same girl. She was trying to convince herself to live. At least for a bit longer. She was trying to find reasons to live, but then it just all piled up. And she couldn’t take it anymore. So she jumped.
Also, a few not-so-fun-but-imma-call-them-fun-anyways facts, those flowers on the short girl’s desk were chrysanthemum.
Which symbolise death, like red spider lilies. So basically the people were telling her to die.
And, people take off their shoes when they commit in Japan to show that it wasn’t a murder.
Imma just go now sorry for ranting-
Listen to Diary of Underage Observation if you want the true ending to MY R
Oh lord, I been waiting for this video!!
This made me cry twice when hearing your message. This song is a very good representation of this topic.
definitely one of the best vocaloid songs. it, together with the video, is sooo powerful. and i didn't understand it at first either but i still cried
I really want to see you react to more songs made by GHOST, they're one of my favorite creators and every song of theirs that I listen to are bangers.
Love ya Shooshi 💜
You too tnt 😩
Yes! I love this song and thank you for finally reacting to this 😭😭
Yo i was HOPING youd do this one! I haveny watched it yet, but i'm hyped already!
I’ll be honest, I’ve been having a rough week but when you post your videos happen to make my day. Thanks for making these videos and making my day a lot better. :)
I'm actually crying at your message, thank you..❤
Such a gorgeous song that a lot of people can relate to for there own reasons but it's highly appreciated that you did a video about this I appreciate it ❤
This is the one reaction video i activately aboid watching because i know km going to break down into tears from it. But now, after all the sh!t ive been through, i needed to hear that from you. It actually gave me a small push to guve my life another chance and hope for the better. Thank you, Shooshi.
Since we're KurageP fans now, I would recommend Chururira Chururia Daddadda, Trash and Trash, and Check Check One Two, which are all very good. They also have official MVs which is always nice. Chururira Chururia Daddadda especially though, it's such an interesting song.
1. The MC was taking her shoes off when going to the rooftop. When someone leaves their shoes behind it means they jumped out of their own will
2. Flowers are placed on one's desk when they die. So in turn placing flowers on the desk of a living person is like saying "I wish you were dead"
3. When girls left by jumping, their reasons died with them, the MC no longer cared about what was happening in those parts of her life.
When the girl in yellow cardigan left by walking away it meant that her reason stayed alive with herself. The MC was still very much affected by that part of her life.
4. As the song goes, it says that every day a different girl appears on the roof and MC has to talk them against their decision, each time successful. Meaning that all the pains in her life were subdued.
When the yellow cardigan girl appeared, MC didn't succeed in persuasion. She couldn't convince herself that this isn't important.
5. When noone showed up on the roof it's like MC didn't care about trying to talk herself out of this. She gave up.
if you go to 5:15 and slow it down to 0.5 or 0.25, you get the storyline and everything, like the bullies and her school supposedly push her to the ground and used scissors to cut her hair short, and they show you all the things that her family is treating her and yea
I genuinely love your videos so much, music like this I appreciate so much and now is a big comfort for me to understand that I’m not alone. I’m shock I how fast I did understand this message and knew it was the same girl, what a beautiful message, another great video.
I missed the stream because of.... personal reasons that make me not wanna get out of bed to go to my computer and I've been feeling.. bad. I had to pause the video when the mv ended because that's when the realization hit that all those girls were just one person. ngl that made me cry a little bit since I.. i guess sadly relate to everything. I really appreciate you making a whole other video to add onto the edit from the stream to explain it more, so thank you. As always, your video helped make my day a little more bearable. Thank you again.
I really love it. Thank you. Thank you very much
i've been waiting for you to react to my r for the longest timeeee! im so happy you reacted to this because its one of the songs that got me to vocaloid! this video is really well made and I can't wait to see more reaction videos!
this song is actually part of an album from kurage p, the creator of the original song, called "Diary of underage observation." I think the songs from this album fit the content you make. Every song from that album has very deep meanings with different melodies and artists.
You can find the songs of this album on youtube, many people have made playlists of the songs from the album in the correct order so feel free to check them out and even react to them if you want to.
this song, my r, is actually the second to last song of the album. the last song of the album, the main character there actually saves the girl from my r! i dont see diary of underage observation talked about a lot so i hope you can react to some of the songs!
anywayz stay safe everyone :)
as somebody with depression, your message helped me.
thank you so much for that message it made me cried a lot i needed to hear that thank you smdgnm
Thank you so much for covering this song. The meaning behind this really emphasises with my life and how I feel on a day to day basis. The ending message of this video made me cry, it was what I needed to hear and words cannot express how grateful I am to have stumbled upon this video- this channel
I hate that I can’t find the original version because everyone makes everything English
I love this song and I usually cry when I listen to this...The last girl to fly was a short girl who took off her cardigan and untied her braids. I think she hesitated to fly in the same place over and over again. So I think that four characters in this video are actually the SAME person.The story always makes us sad..
I could go on and on why i love this song, its so genuine about what its like being suicidal and depressed, i especially love how she talks to her issues, shes screaming at herself, telling herself how stupid she is for wanting to die because of these things, and every time she thinks "this is what i should be living for" all she does is put a spotlight on it which only makes her mental health worse, its such a real look at a topic that most of the time gets treated like a punchline or something that not a lot of people understand in general, such an amazing song that brings me to tears everytime
I like your set up and great video 💗💗💗
Oh hey thanks :)
I love this song so much, even though it's really sad, I typically listen to the English version so that I can sing along, but I am super happy you did a reaction to it.
I remember listening to this song when i was in middle school when i was depressed as hell, i found this song as comfort, a way for me to expressed what i felt at the time. i cried each time when i heard this song at the time but two years from now, listening to these songs many old memories flooded into my mind as tears stream down my face realizing how young i was when i went through all that pain and almost ended my life right there forgetting i have someone in my life i needed to live for.
My R is just such a good song
Rachie and Bao's versions are such good iconic covers y really recomend them
The person who saved the girl from My R is the girl from Diary of Underage Observation, another KurageP song!! ^^
You dont know how hard i cried at the end, with your monologue ❤ thank you
hello, new here (have seen a glimpse of you in my recs) -- so glad you analyzed this song because it is one of my faves of all time. thank you for the kind message at the end as well.
Welcome :)). And yeah no problem. I love doing these !
Omg this song always makes me cry 😭. I used to listen to this song like a year ago but I only listened to it on the surface level of “this is sad I’ll cry to this” but after all that time I truly understand the message and it makes me cry 10x more… Along with that, you should definitely check out the volcaloid songs “Rotten Love Waltz” and “Adorami” by CATTS. They are very talented, the songs have a very interesting story, and I think they deserve more attention.
i use to hate this song so much, but as i continue to listen to it. the more i would start to understand her pain. now i almost cry to it everytime.
Watching your videos makes me feel so much better when I’m not feeling the best mentally I can’t even explain how grateful I am. I happened to click on this video and it just made me feel so much better, your one of my favorite streamers/RUclipsr thank you so much and I hope your having a great day or night :)
I was waiting for this song, this song in general, just makes me tear up a little hah
Thank you so much for this reaction. This song has been with me for 2 years and it really helped me fight with my struggles :) My R introduced me to anime, Japanese rock, and Japanese media in general. Anyways thanks for reading!
This most likely confirmed by song 'diary of underage obsession' as you hear the mc of that song talking about 'a girl who muttered to herself on the rooftop'. These songs are in the same album too, I believe.
There’s a song connected to this song, Diary of Underage Observation! You should check it out, the end of it continues the My R story!
Thank you for telling me this... I needed this so much.... I love your videos too you put a smile on my face when I watch your videos like I said I really needed this and for everyone that has depression like me and is having a hard time we gotta keep pushing because someone maybe someone will care if we die
I like the up lifting messages you give at the end of your videos they make me happy 💩❤️
Fun fact. This was the FIRST vocalold song ive listened to. I was like 4 or 5 and in my gacha phase.
I never really knew that originally this song was vocaloid….huh..the saddest thing is that there’s many people theorizing the R in the song name stands for ‘reflection’
I don’t even think it’s a theory anymore
3 days late for this,but this little information is for rewatchers and new/late people watching this as well
"Don't do it"
This had two wording during the song
やめなよ(yamena yo) at the beginning
then やめてよ(yamete yo) at the end
Now this is where the small details shows...
Yamena yo is used to stop someone if they're doing something to another person like "Don't to it (for others)"
While Yamete yo, is used to stop someone if they're doing something to you like "Don't do it (for me)"
And that just shows that by the end of the song, the girl wanted help, she wanted to stop herself from killing herself
Wow :,)
It's hinted that she's the same girl each time by "yellow cardigan", "ponytails" and being a "short girl"
You can't understand how much this channel comforts and helps me in my life man
Funnily enough this is the song I mostly associate with my childhood, because of all the "sad gacha mv's" I used to watch
Oh wow I forgot about this song, so glad you reacted to it tho
I know most these comments talk about how good this song is and how nice it is that you took the time to read into it and fully grasp how this song truly uses its story to be incredible....
...BUT YOUR FUTURE SHIRT, WHAT IS ON THAT SHIRT? I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THE ART ON IT, I WANNA KNOW!!!
Bruh the whole explanation really hit home and wow really made me realize a lot of things. Not me here sobbing at the “my message to you” part
I'm so glad you had find out of this music video, this is, for me, the best!!!
I love this music both in Japanese and English language, it made me cried so hard when I was watching it for the fist time and realized that she was trying to convince herself and finding reasons not to jump :(
I'm six hours Late... But you took my suggestion 😍
I've been suggesting My R for so long and now you did it!!!
Whatever your life, never give up!!
Love your video ❤️❤️✨✨
Hi Shooshi ^o^ great reaction video again!! I may have cried along to this reaction because of the song, haha...
Could you try doing one of Minami's songs? Maybe "Main Actor". It's a brilliant song and her vocals are great
want to know how this end? "diary of underage observation" its the last song of the album of this song and at the same time is the song that gives name to the album itself
I relate to this song a lot, especially the short girl who is ignored my everyone. I listen to this song and Shinitai chan at school a lot. Call my cringe, but this song brings a lot of comfort to me.
Finally
Someone who knows about mental health and doesnt call her overreacting
There's a sequel to this song which is the Diary of Underage Observation. ^^
Thanks for your massage, you save me.
It was great, and I'm sure you've helped someone everytime the video was launched, at least it did it for me
one of the nice details was in one line before the main character "jumps," she says she takes off her yellow cardian, which the last girl had. Reflecting its herself and she wishes she could just ask herself to not do it but she stills wants to. (anybody can correct me on this)
Its not just that one.
“Taking off my [Yellow Cardigan], watching my [Braids] all come undone, this petite girl, [Short] as can be is going to jump now.”
hi! i just wanted to say that i just discoverd this song called "Hollowness" it's by a really talented artist by the name of "Minami" she also sang the op to domestic girlfriend if that rings any bells i highly recomend it if you want to cry a little
i sadly missed the stream, but i actually never heard the Japanese ver. but its good, i just watched the english one which is also good just the lyrics subbed differently i just love this song-
pls remember that you are loved and never forgotten, your special
This song is really beutiful. There are some amazing covers of this song, out there too.
Hello, I've been watching your videos for a few months now. I enjoy your content a lot! I've been having a hard time at home and in general because my family invalidates my depression a lot. And summer school hasn't been great. It's been a lot of things. Lately I have been feeling s*icidal.. Your message spoke to me, thank you. I cried, but that's okay. Thank you for that message, Shooshi.
Sorry for the rambling/venting at the beginning. Have a good day.
Edit: Also, I want to list songs by Siinamota that I really recommend (truthfully i recommend all of his songs)
Drug score, nee, Sayonarawoiwazuni, Goodbye Everyone, Q, Strobe Light, Strobe Last, Pallet Niha Kimi Ga Ippai, City Lights, Alive Conscious, etc.
If you want the story behind the hand at the end check out their song diary of underage observation.
Yo this made me tear up so hard like there is an endless loop of trying to stop yourself from losing yourself from the world this hit so hard.
Btw I notice a flower in the petite girl's desk.
P.S. Can u react to distortionist or rotary dial by ghost pls.
it's scary to think that I just relate to this whole song when I was 12. this was at least my first miku song, and more to come in the future. This song may speak to other people too, I hope nothing but the best for those people.
the ending of this video was just what I needed to hear
I finally have time to comment in this video.
I don't want to be attention seeker either. I've been struggled with imagining things to unalive myself. Having PTSD, anxiety and depression since young ages but this song makes me cried because exactly one year ago, my late dad kept trying to jump off the hospital balcony minutes after I listen to this song with my earplugs. My only best friend, dad almost died because of me triggered his 'unalive himself' thought.
Thankfully, he died in my arms on August 14 on a wheelchair due to heart failure that he suffered since 20s while I brought him to the toilet. He just closed his eyes like sleeping in a wheelchair and my dumb*ss thought he passed out.
At least, he didn't die because of jumping off the balcony or else I'll keep blaming myself for his death. Rest well, my only best friend, my dad.
all of the girls are her, whenever she goes up there, she's talking herself out of doing it, that's why she makes them turn away. at the end of the song she says "Taking of MY yellow cardigan watching MY BRAIDS come undone THIS PETITE girl short as can be is going to jump now and be free" the first girl she talks to is her with her braids, the second refers to her as the petite girl the last one who suffers the same as her is the one with the cardigan, it's her at the end of her line when she decided she didnt want to go on anymore