Queer Eye - Healing Through Consuming | Salari
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- Опубликовано: 5 сен 2024
- Why are the Japanese so Lonely?: • Why are the Japanese s...
Queer Eye is a wonderful and inspirational show, but somewhere along the way its message of self-improvement and empowerment gets a little muddled.
If you enjoyed this video (or are currently enjoying it while reading this), then please consider subscribing to my channel to keep up with future content.
Thanks again to Kurashu for his fantastic work on the intro.
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Sources:
'Even Space Isn’t Safe From Ads': slate.com/tech...
'How much do therapists charge across the country? And why don't they charge less?': www.therapyden...
''Queer Eye' star Karamo Brown admits that he 'hates' the title of culture expert': www.insider.co...
'The untold truth of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition': www.thelist.co...
i actually know one of the people who was featured on the show. young guy named thomas, lives with (and was nominated by) his sister, plays lots of WoW and watches lots of anime. super shy and soft-spoken. when he told me about the experience after it happened he said the producer was rude as fuck, rushed everything, and tried to spin his friendship with our mutual friend ewan in a negative light. the three of us (as well as other mutual friends) knew each other through WoW and had entirely online friendships, and the producer was obviously prejudiced towards that kind of friendship.
thomas also said that karamo was the nicest dude in the world and they went out for drinks after filming, and he did in fact keep in touch.
That's really interesting, especially the part about them spinning the online friendships as bad ones. There's so many people (namely older generations) that think friendships that are entirely online lack meaning/importance compared to ones in person, and obviously that's so far from the truth, they probably portrayed it that way because most audiences feel the same way. I'm glad to hear that Karamo though, if it turned out he was a dick IRL I'd be a little heartbroken. Could you tell me which episode it was? I'd like to watch it again
Salari it was season 3, episode 7, "sloth to slay." thankfully ewan didn't give them permission to have his voice used in the show so they didn't get the clips of the two of them talking that the producer wanted to spin in a negative light. i think thomas enjoyed the overall experience, he certainly didn't say he hated it. he's such a shy and introverted dude that he was kind of stressed out by having the whole filming crew in his house, though.
Oh yeah, I remember that now. I'm glad they weren't able to twist the narrative too much. I think omitting a person's passions from the show because the producer believes they carry a stigma or the audience won't like it, is just disrespectful to that person and the people like them. If it has value to that person then it's up to the makers of the show to portray why it's valuable, but instead they took the lazy approach I guess. I'm glad he enjoyed it though, I feel like most people would (although if they bust into my apartment and started going through all my stuff I'd probably have a mild panic attack)
picksey oh hey. Me too 🤣
Krissy Diggs oh shit hey! tell thomas that cas (volk's friend) says hi! 👋 i haven't touched WoW in a long ass time so i haven't said hi, i feel bad about that.
In Karamo's book he talks at length about his role and how the show runners didnt want it to be a therapy role, he did. They wanted to keep it as the original, with tickets to a theater show or art museum. So he had to fight hard to push them to accept the change, and even then his screen time was cut immensely in the first season. It wasnt until the fans reacted really well to him and the change did they really accept it and let him take control of the role
That explains to me why his role is called “culture.” Because there’s a bit of that, but it’s always seemed more therapeutic. I love Karamo and all of the guys.
I didn't realize he had a book. I love that guy and need to check that book out!
@@els1f Its good and really gives perspective on him and his background! General tw for addiction/drug use for anyone interested in reading it though
@@yokonamigaara Cool, thanks for bringing it up! 👍 I honestly didn't realize he was a therapist until this video, but it makes perfect sense in hindsight
what book is it
This is why I loved the episode where they help a chick who's an environmental activist. They get all the furniture and clothes secondhand since she morally wants to be as sustainable as possible. But it does feel a bit weird to hear them agree so thoroughly with her and prove it's possible to achieve these outcomes sustainably, but then buy brand new stuff for every other episode.
To please the algorithm, I'd like to add that Karamo has the deepest most emotionally-sensitive eyes ever. They're like lasers, but with kindness.
Oh for sure, I don't even like making prolonged eye contact with people but I could get lost in those eyes
I feel like "Tidy Up with Marie Kondo" is the anti-consumerist take of the home makeover genre. Nice video!
Except for buying those little boxes for various stuff
True about the boxes but you can get a lot of cool stuff at the dollar store, or repurpose boxes around your home if you have the energy
@@waychelb9439 maybe she's selling out a little by marketing storage. But her book is very clear about not finding storage until completely done decluttering. She says most people already own enough storage boxes and encourages ppl to use shoe boxes etc.
Ya
I think that there ought to actually be an examination of the moral superiority exhibited by so many decluttering freaks, and how Marie K, bless her, has confessed in interviews (The Sunday Times for one) that she has 'very few interests outside of tidying', and thus the judgements meted out to collectors or avid readers and/or researchers with piles of books and ephemera (and DVDs etc etc) should be taken with a grain of salt.
I am blown away that they hid Karamo's qualifications! They really do just portray him as a "cool guy" and that is all. Thank you for this insight.
literally thats how i always thought he was because of it. i thought he was just "emotionally intelligent cool guy"
I think another aspect of Karamo's work, which is maybe why so little of it is shown, is privacy. The show needs to balance showing how Karamo helps the heroes with respecting their privacy at least a little. And by doing that, the importance of the psychotherapy can't be properly portraied. But I definitly agree that calling it what it is instead of 'culture expert' would already help!
You can see in the first season that that was his role. He was to create "cultural experience". In later interviews he says that he said that that wasn't fitting what he wanted to achieve and thus they changed it into psychotherapy. And unfortunately, that is hard to portray on TV and the producers don't do a great job with it.
@Raquel I'm with in that it shouldn't have been a TV moment. Having a licensed therapist/social worker there as a neutral moderator is a good thing though. They can help navigate those super difficult first minutes and them leave them alone.
In general, I don't think they should show therapy sessions, but maybe some footage of Karamo and the person talking from further away, with some explanatory voice over that doesn't give away anything super personal.
This reminds me of an animated film called 'robots', where the catchphrase to get the robots to buy upgrades and not spare parts was 'why be you, when you can be new'...
I love that film
Upgrades people, upgrades
Kuramo might be important but Bobby works the hardest BY FAR. While the others are making salsa or cutting hair, Bobby is renovating an entire house in a weekend.
I think QE could be vastly improved with more segments like they had this past season. More DIY. More thrifting. More of Karamo being included in scenes that aren’t strictly therapy based. I thought the new season did a far better job with many of these ideas. But there’s for sure room for them to diy even more and thrift even more
For me, interior design is a big source of happiness and fulfillment for me. I’ve been able to furnish and decorate most of my apartment for under 1,000 dollars over time by thrifting one dollar plates, getting discarded roadside furniture, or up cycling/diying. The show could EASY integrate these concepts into the their format without losing any of the fun! I mean it was hilarious watching Antoni tandem bike to cut down on fossil fuels and it was great seeing how bobby could upcycle furniture
Right!! I loved the thrifting episode
Jd Of ooh what episode was it I haven’t seen the new season yet
@@elliebee9692 I cant remember hang on
@@elliebee9692 I dont know why i was think of big mouth but that's not it omg I'd have to rewatch it to tell ya
Jd Of oh ok gotcha no worries
I really liked (well, everything, but specially) the part about psychological healthcare.
I particularly liked the excerpt: "I doubt many people would want to watch a show where someone has a 50min therapy session while someone in their home cleans up the dishes that are stacked up in the sink. But for most people, that's reality."
Thanks! I'm glad you liked that line, I'm sure a lot of people could sympathize with it. Personally I'd actually love to see more media that has an honest portrayal of therapy, I think it would help people be far less averse to the idea of seeking out help, especially in America.
I would actually love a show like that shame it would never sell to executives.
@@clearlynotaneldritchhorror8798 Hard same. Audio of that therapy session played over footage of someone methodically hand-washing that patient's dishes sounds incredibly poignant to me. (Or, like, actors reading anonymized transcripts? Probably still violates confidentiality. Alas.)
I'd actually kind of like to make this show now. Friends that came over and threw a load of my laundry in for me, took out the mountain of garbage, and then sat down and chatted until the laundry was done helped me more with coping with depression than buying anything ever did.
I would absolutely love a show like that. It’s also why I prefer the UK version of Hoarders to the American one, because the UK version sends their people to therapy sessions and finds ways for them to deal with all their things, whereas the American one is mainly “Hi I threw out all your stuff now deal with it bye” [/tangent]
so was anyone going to tell me that karamo is a licensed psycho therapist and social worker or was i supposed to find that out in this video essay 😭
I think he’s mentioned it in a few episodes, but I definitely wish that was displayed as a prominent part of his title/role in the show!
Honestly when I started watching this, I saw that he very much took the "therapy" role and was wondering to myself if he was qualified to be in that role. I then absolutely forgot to look it up haha
This was my exact response.
@@1996ken same lol
I grew up in a "third world" country that is also extremely neoliberal. Right by the entrance of the subway station I had to use every day, there was an enormous billboard with a pic of Jennifer Aniston selling Aveno. I really hated it because it was so gigantic that it painted my mornings with its vapid message. Then, one day, I actually had a fucking dream where Jennifer Aniston was selling me Aveno. I woke up angry and made a conscious choice to never EVER buy any product of that brand, which I never have and never will. Also now I hate the actress. Thanks, Capitalism.
This reminds me of my school where one part of my school had pepsi painted all over it you have to see it everywhere everytime the blue and red made me nauseous sometimes tbh
This is somehow very funny to me 😂 I totally get the frustration tho.
I love how even-handed you were, acknowledging how great aspects of the show are while giving great concise criticism. I found myself feeling exactly the way you described when watching it, I find it can be extremely touching and funny at times but as a product it is required to promote consumerism. I can’t go on long binges anymore because that aspect can be more pronounced when watching episodes concurrently, but it still has those great aspects that cause me to return, and feel more wholesome.
Thank you! I couldn't agree more, that's the tough thing about being critical of media you enjoy, I think as leftists there's kind of tell ourselves that we shouldn't enjoy certain things because of how they're produced or the messaging, but so long as we're mindful I think we can grant ourselves some concessions. 30 Rock is one of my all time fave sitcoms but it has some absolutely awful transphobia in it (not to mention the blackface scenes, too). I'm happy you felt I struck that balance well, I didn't want to make people feel bad for enjoying the show, because like I said, I enjoy it myself, too.
One thing ive also noticed is, while they are doing this "good deed", which i do genuinely believe is in good faith, we often see them buying clothes from stores like Zara and H&M, which are cheap and made with slave labor. This ultimately undermines the message I think they are trying to portray of helping someone through materialism but ultimately doing more harm than good, for both people in developing countries and the environment. I think this was best evidenced by the episode with the young woman who was running a climate campaign when they helped her: instead of buying cheap and new products they thrifted and bought items that had been slightly damaged so would have been discarded otherwise. I feel like that should have been the way to go with the entire show, both helping this specific person while showing they and the audience dont need new things to make their lives better, that they can reinvent themselves without causing harm to others
I agree with you so much on this! I believe the format maybe doesn't help them with having enough time to fix what people already have that could be repaired but would take too long to do so.
I appreciate that point! The tension of ethics between people who can afford sustainable fashion VS spending beyond their means is tough.
Expensive brands also use slave labor. Unless you can actually trace where your clothing was made, it’s really hard to know it wasn’t made under exploitative conditions. I started teaching myself to make my own clothes, but having the time to do that is also a luxury.
@@Risaala totally agree, that's why I didn't say to buy luxury i said to thrift and buy things that would have been discarded for being damaged. Luxury brands are known to have specific parts made with slave labor then send them to be finished in Europe so they can say "made in france/italia/UK" its all a scam, im trying to say dont contribute to it by buying the products new
Yeah I really liked that episode and would love to see more like that (although it did feel a bit odd to hear them talking about how important climate activism is while driving around in that enormous car!)
On the Karamo point,, extremely agree. Like in season 3 there was a lesbian girl who'd been kicked out of her family for coming out and I was wondering how this one therapy session going to be close to enough to solve any of her issue. I don't know, maybe if the show frames Karamo's part as start of therapy or counseling and offers the participant necessary referrals with expenses paid if they don't have insurance
That would be good, I'm sure the show could definitely foot the bill for at least monthly sessions. What you mention is kind of another part of the problem with how the show frames these aspects, too; they stress the importance of maintaining appearances and routines, but so many of them could benefit from ongoing mental healthcare. I'm glad that Karamo goes out of his way to have mini-sessions with them, but yeah, they need more than that.
I follow her on insta, she's actually doing great and has a girlfriend, I think it's more the general theory that sometimes people just need people to care and give them a push. But yah, some of these things need longer term help
Thanks to everyone for watching/subbing! I recently released my video on the loneliness epidemic in Japan, I'd appreciate it if you watched: ruclips.net/video/sx3mQftSMSo/видео.html
Thank you all again, you're all wonderful people.
Good luck with it, and as the old saying goes "we will watch your career with great interest".
EYEBALLS
お先に失礼します！ Sounds like a fantastic video, abusing service (duty) for service (work).
A transformation almost as disgusting as Lord Occulon's gaze.
That is a topic *very* close to my heart, and given how sensitively & insightfully you handled the nuances of Queer Eye's message, I'm really looking forward to seeing how you approach it.
Sounds interesting. Subscribing to see that. Love your presentation style by the way.
I agree that going on this show is essentially like winning a lottery in terms of how much money these makeovers can cost (including the therapy). I think Antoni's role is the only one where it isn't as much about throwing money at problems as it is about having the time, patience and knowledge to cook for oneself.
Your comments regarding psychotherapy are so kind. I am a licensed clinical psychologist and I am completely burned out. I really needed to hear that some people do value the kind of work I do.
I value you too. Thanks for all that you do!
Thank you for what you do!!
I worked a job that required my cohost and me to be on camera, and the boss said she wanted to "Queer Eye" both of us and assigned us episodes of the show to watch, and was very unkind about both our physical appearances. She would regularly call out "stomach awareness" when our guts would be visible on camera, and we'd stand up, straighten our shirts out, and then retake the scene.
I absolutely love the idea that this show's premise is that everyone is deserving of self-improvement. People, including these strangers, want others to be happy, and it's nice to see this. Then when you get into the material stuff, it sours a bit. I could never figure out why I like this show, but it felt off. This video did a great job of helping me realize why. Also, I'm a Thought Slime viewer so that's probably why the algorithm brought me here. Glad that happened!
The piano version of "Fake Plastic Trees" while talking about our culture's consumerism is perfect.
I'm a huuuge fan of Radiohead, I was glad to finally have an opportunity to use the song
@@Salari Did I hear a No Surprises in there too?
Am I the only one that heard basket case by Green Day?
to hell with million dollar clothes can these guys just fix my teeth?
I’ve noticed that whenever they fix someone’s teeth, that’s when they’re happiest and cry. Teeth are so important to us humans. Honestly pisses me off dental isn’t considered healthcare. Fucking goverment
@@user-mb9nm7bq5e Hey, it's not like a tooth infection can kill you or anyth- oh, it can? Should have thought about that before you got cavities, I guess! Just go to the- oh, right.
Be r I know, right?
@@peat_moss856 Which is the worst part because processed food diets lead to worse teeth and the people who buy these foods usually do so for affordability and therefore can't fix the damage they are causing just surviving day to day 💔
@@user-mb9nm7bq5e We have universal health in Canada and it includes psychotherapy and addiction treatment etc. -- but not dental. Totally weird. My sis makes way more $ than I so we joke around that she has American teeth but really she has wealthy people's teeth ....
What I love about Jonathan Van Ness is that he seems to always recommend self care/ grooming tips that fit a person’s lifestyle and budget.
I had noticed something amiss with the home makeovers although I couldn't quite put my finger on it. In most of the other sections I could take some lessons to incorporate into my own life, like how to do specific skin care, how to flatter a certain bodytype, etc, but even though the home makeovers are gorgeous I was always wondering how I could improve my own home in a similar way without refurnishing it completely all at once.
Yeah, even just some organization or room coordinating tips would be nice, even showing people how to spruce up existing furniture for a low cost. I've learned some good style tips from the show, and I've always believed in Tan's philosophy that style is forever, fashion is temporary. That guy really loves his French tucks.
I think for me I'd find it hard (and same with the wardrobe) to have that big a change all at once, and with items I didn't decide on myself. The houses are often beautiful, but look right out of a magazine, lacking the years of personal touches and homeliness that I need to be comfortable. I suppose there's loads of room for added décor, and otherwise it's sort of similar to moving into a furnished apartment, but it sure would be strange. Most of this I think comes from my OCPD because not having complete control over my personal space/belongings is basically the worst thing ever.
@@asterismos5451 yeah same. I mean if your house was terrible before it would be great but I feel like most people have at least some nice furniture already.
Bobby has talked a bit about how important color is and that painting the walls or your kitchen doors are an easy way to revive a space
I was expecting this to go more of a direction of the harms of positive stereotypes, not only negative. The fact that this criticism didn't touch on the idea that they need to be gay to be experts was great, actually.
Yeah, I think the idea that sexual orientation is somehow intrinsically linked to your sense of style is like you say a harmful positive stereotype. I would hope that if it was created today and wasn't a spin off from the old show, it would have a different selling point other than "queer folks are good at makeovers", since with the original show in the 2000s definitely leveraged that stereotype as a way of getting attention. Thank you very much for watching, I really appreciate it!
I think the problem isn’t the show it’s society. Gay men are allowed to fully embrace their humanity and embrace arts, creativity, compassion, charity and things that straight men aren’t allowed to be. Another thing is that their being gay allows them to help women without feeling like they’re going to imprint on the women or send certain signals and alarm the women (which happens often in shows and some throw it off and in other cases becomes problematic. A huge example of this is the show Survivor). This is also likely the reason why a lesbian version of the show wouldn’t work the same either as straight women have some strange discrimination against them depending on a lot of things: a lot of straight women view lesbians as jaded women that couldn’t feel in male attention. Or are just appalled by the idea that women could view them in a sexual way due to the fact that most men constantly proposition women any chance they could get and a lot of women don’t get a break to just be without being prepositioned, which is exhausting and makes many women weary. Or if the women are too attractive the women they might try to help might scoff at their help and attempts to connect or even feel ignore if she notices the women get attention from a male partner. Gay men work for this concept because they’re not a threat to men or women for the most part. Also this show avoids your typical average straight POC guy or conservative white guys. The men helped in the show tend to be exhibit more complex traits like emotional vulnerabilities and compassion, even the flashiest guy they had (some NJ DJ) exhibited a level of friendliness and warmth to the men that IRL if you notice, most men aren’t too comfortable with showing. Women aren’t intimidated by gay men since a lot of the gay men behave or exhibit qualities that most straight women would like in men, like vanity and more kindness, without the edge that a lot of straight men give out acting like desperate rabbit animals at the smell of pussy. Gay men for the most part treat women like human beings, so women tend to seek friendships with them and support them since in many ways, women are safe around gay men. I don’t think the show means to perpetuate the positive stereotypes but until society is fully comfortable with allowing people to just be, there’s going to be ways that these issues are going to be skirted by. This representation is one of the few accepted ways that avoids vulnerabilities between the parties. Even the one man the gang flirted with (again m, the DJ, who’s straight) was extremely unusual compared to how most men respond to gay male attention. He was kind, respectful, he’d flirt right back and he just was with them. It is one of my favorites because the man was not only very natural, open and comfortable with them but he was honest and he let them be, so you really see a lot of the gang’s full nature pop throughout. It’s such a great episode and made me really proud of the DJ for being such a full, unprejudiced, inhibited person not just to himself and his family but with the team and the audience. Baby steps, but at least there’s efforts. Effort is better than none.
@@anamarte7547 Great, but where do bisexual men like myself fit into all this
Oh my god, I can't wait for your video on Japanese Capitalism. It's a topic very close to my heart.
But also thank you very much for this gem of analysis, certainly brings the point home in a concise but enjoyable and cozy way.
Thank you, I'm so glad you enjoyed it. The video on Japan is my most ambitious project yet, I've spent well over a month researching and talking to people about it so I can get a firm understanding of what's going on there, and it's honestly so tragic, it's been really interesting though. Hopefully I should release it within the next couple of weeks, just gotta finish the edit now.
I would actually like a show that's a long therapy session. It's the closest I'll get to having therapy since I was in middle school.
There is a couples therapy podcast. "Where should we begin".
There's also psychology in Seattle who has a podcast talking about psychology and reviews reality TV couples as a kind of case study. He always emphasizes that he can only judge from the what's on screen but its really helpful to identify negative patterns in yourself and find out how to break out of them
there is also that mtv show 'the therapist' but it's mostly celebrities, specifically hip hop and other music artists.
The Korean show called Hello Counselor is close!!!
Dear Therapists podcast is this
"When was the last time you bought some to make you happy?".
Sir it's called a spirit Halloween and I spend so much money there and everything brings me joy.
Same.
Very well said! I think the show is in a way a victim of a consumerist culture also i feel like the way they help people isnt very diverse? Like not everyone identifies with designer clothes and a slightly personalized home decor i know i dont but maybe thats just me
this is particularly obvious when theyre helping someone that is lower class, during most episodes its like "they needed a helping hand with style tips and someone to tell them to love themselves more" and all that but there are SOME episodes where its like...they would not have been able to make these improvements WITHOUT the budget of a netflix show
This video wasn’t successful at merely its stated goal, but it also getting me to reevaluate how I approach self-improvement, personally. You have given much to think about... thank you.
I've come from the eyeball zone and I'm glad
Same here. Praise be to the Eyeballs.
No one can escape the all power visage of the eyes ball
It showed up in my suggestions probably because I watch thought slime! Definitely double glad I clicked.
I didn't even see thought slime this week but this was in my recommended so top notch algorithming
Karamo is a psychotherapist AND social worker?? Wow! The most emotional scenes always involve him. He’s so empathetic and sweet.
But... doing psychotherapy on TV is VERY questionable, ethically.
It is, obviously it would require consent on all sides and if portrayed I would argue that it should be devoid of editing and evocative music. I'm not sure I'd trust American TV producers with the format given their tendency to twist reality for the sake of entertainment, but in the UK we've had some good, educational portrayals of parts of the health industry that were more honest representations.
Like you say, it's ethically questionable, but so much mental healthcare in TV/Film is represented via fiction, I think some form of real portrayal would be beneficial for those unaware of the process.
@@Salari That's really interesting! Are there any portrayals in the UK that you'd recommend?
@@andremedeiros2181 Off hand, there's 'One Born Every Minute', which takes place in a maternity ward and it follows people who are there to give birth - it's more of a fly on the wall style kind of thing, and they don't do much to dramatize the events other than some basic editing. 'Embarrassing Bodies' was also really good, on the surface it kinda looks like exploitative television since it's people speaking to doctors with some admittedly gross problems, but it offers valid advice from real doctors who treat their patients with respect, and its message is that if you, the viewer have a problem you're reluctant to see a professional about, you needn't worry about being embarrassed.
@@Salari I think also the US suffers more than most countries from the good intentions of Oprah Winfrey which did lead to a 'too much information' shift where deep emotional events and issues are trivialized by sharing them with inappropriate people in casual settings; law of unintended consequences because Oprah manifestly has been a force for good.
For me the only real appeal of that type of makeover is being able to get things that are durable, require little maintenance, and generally actually work well--having new simple things that work around my house instead of the things that are currently broken or don't work great would be amazing beyond words, but the idea of someone coming in and replacing all my things with shiny new expensive things truly is horrifying to me. This might be 100% down to me being autistic but my things are mine and if I weren't the one signing off on every executive decision and ensuring everything would actually work well and isn't too complicated or manufactured to fail, that experience would be a total living hell. This video sparked a whole internal dialogue on how one actually could go about improving their living space and I actually repurposed an old peice of desk as a tray for some of the stuff I keep on the floor in my main relaxing space so I could clean better. I've never watched Queer Eye but it was cool to get an insight into how the show works and you really got me thinking about alternatives to the consumerist methods of improving your life so thank you! Also hard agree capitalism bad and I really wish we had a system that allowed people free access to mental healthcare rather than one that gaslights everyone and pretends you can paper over systemic problems with commodities. It's really cool that the show does make an effort to address mental health, even though it should be more widely available by default. It would be nice also to have more community workshops where people could make or post requests for custom furniture to suit individual needs but I could go on forever
I totally get that. In fact, I'll share a little bit about myself here; I went on a school trip for about a week when I was 12, I hated it there and I couldn't wait to get back and sleep in my own bedroom. When I returned, my parents surprised me, and revealed they totally redecorated my bedroom, painted walls, a bunk bed instead of a single one, new furniture, everything rearranged. I was exhausted from the 25 hour coach drive back home and broke down in tears of sadness when I saw the changes. It was a nice gesture, but yeah, I didn't sign off on it.
They have so little time with each 'hero' that they aren't really able to consult them on everything... "oh you like this one decor item? That will inspire the redecoration of your whole house". It seems like it would be way cheaper if they just asked what they needed, like more storage, better office set up, etc. It'd be less "impressive" but far more useful.
Maker spaces are hella cool and I desperately wish more of them existed outside of cities
Oh wow I'm opposite. I own so few things and can't afford to fill out so I prefer places already furnished for now but even these aren't always the best admittedly. I would cry with relief if I went into my room one day and it was put together and beautiful. I know how to make a place feel like home within a day...so interesting how different we all really are 🤗💜
Really great video! I didn't realise that Karamo was a psychotherapist. That's actually brilliant.
This show essentially does paint a big circle around how American healthcare - and particularly mental health - is failing their citizens. But also, how traditional masculinity, which involves not talking about problems and feelings, can lead to depression. Most of the problems that the show throws money at are unlikely to become problems at all if the 'Heroes' were in a more mentally stable place. Having said that, these are also things that we value in a society. Having a home that is functional and beautiful or having a wardrobe/haircut that you feel comfortable and confident in will have a positive impact in your life too.
I did want to point out that in later seasons, they do take the 'Hero' to lower end shops for clothes and hair products - maybe catering to the person's income? And the episode with the man who had the ice-skating daughter, he had a huge house and they only did up a couple of rooms so I think there has been a bit of a balance recently.
I guess in a capitalist society self-improvement is intrinsically linked to consumerism and thus we get this makeover show that is probably more consumerist than it intends to be.
Wow! Karamo has always been my favourite, I'm impressed to hear that he checks in with the people featured in the show.
And I completely agree with your points here. Every time I get to the home makeover part of the show I'm not thinking about self-improvement, I'm thinking "wow, I wish Bobby would come to my house and renovate it for me." I completely agree that implementing cleaning and organisational strategies and maybe replacing a few furniture items (maybe fixing broken cabinets or minor renovations) would be much more helpful and realistic than the extreme makeovers
Strange, I don't know if it's coming from a different culture, but I've always viewed Karamo as kind of the leader of the fab 5, all of the other work is to support him and his therapy work.
In my country you can get up to 12 free sessions with a psychologist, and depending on who you see, it can be fairly affordable beyond the free sessions.
Where is this utopia?
Is it in the EU? If so, I have a chance of moving there
LOVED this take, it honestly helped me sum up my own occasional discomfort with the show. That said, from an audio-standpoint, you may wanna try using a "de-esser" before any other effects. You may notice a splash of high end coming thru the reverb whenever you use "t", "s", "th", or "sh" sounds. A de-esser would drastically reduce that. Looking forward to more videos in the future tho!
Thank you! And yeah, I agree with the audio stuff, I have to record in a somewhat open space, but I recently got some acoustic panels up and switched to Audition 2020 which has a great DeReverb and DeEsser feature. I just edited the audio yesterday and it's much better. Thank you for the feedback, I really appreciate it
I definitely think Karamo * (i know I've botched that spelling) and his role weren't given as much space as they could've been. Our mental health affects a lot of how we treat ourselves. I am surprised and happy to know that he's actually a qualified professional and that these people got help they couldn't have afforded on their own
spelling the name is on point and i defo agree haha
I appreciate your point of view. As someone who works with helping people to create businesses based around helping others, I've learned that people simply do not put the time into things that they do not pay for. Paying for something helps people see its value. I do think that we ought to have these services made widely available. The show is aspirational. There are ways to make tehse changes if you are motivated. When I left my husband and moved to a new city, I got myself new furniture. It didn't cost that much because I had a local artist make some of it affordably for me and I planned out my purchases. I needed to envision a new life. Purchases can't fix everything, but investing in yourself is important. And yes, I've paid for a lot of psychotherapy, too. It was valuable, but not really more valuable than yoga or some of the other changes I implemented in my life. Money is a reflection of what we value.
15 minutes of therapy session wile someone cleans there dishes? I have never heard of a more wholesome Show idear. And i would watch it ... and probably cry
Hey Salari, this is a little thank you note from me.
I don't usally write comments on youtube so bear with me if I am not following typical form and/or topic. I wanted to say thank you for this very warm video. I watched your take on beauty and talent in the entertainment industry before - and found it equally good. But this one in particularly touched me, for two reasons. One is that it is really rear seen for a psychologist to receive any credit, much less the credit that is due to them. So hearing it here from you was very, very comforting (yes, I am also working in the field, hence the emotions). Also, for therapie to be represented as something everybody could and should profit from is just amazing - so thank you for that!. Also, thank you for reminding me that consumerism isn't necessarily providing happiness. I have many interests, and I am often frustrated by the lack of money to follow them through the way I would want to. But just your few sentences in the beginning of the video was like a douse of fresh water over my had not to confuse need with desire. To give a direct example: I just bought an (already quite expensive) sport-watch and was very unhappy it wasn't as "good" as one much more expensive. And seeing you video I had to laugh about myself about always wanting more and not be happy with what I got and have - so thank you for this epiphany and the help I received through it - even for something as small as wasting too much money on a watch. With much love and respect Karoline
the quiet, slow "Basket Case" is a nice touch
The little conversations getting to know the protag, working with them to find something that works for them, and then boosting their confidence with little affirmations was the best part of the show. I wish the show revolved more around that, because as a very depressed person, that kind of little connection and empathy is what helps me get out of my funks. When a friend comes over, helps me clear out the dishes and just sits there and talk, that one I reaction can literally keep me going for months. Some of these people just need attention and love, and that, imo, is where the show really does shine.
interesting perspective! I agree that next to the flashy remodelling and the loud and charming personalities, Karamo's work is often overlooked when it truly is the most important aspect of the show!
The eyeball zone sends their approval to this meaningful and well put together video.
I love how they call Tan the fashion expert, yet most of his advice is "please wear clothes that will fit you". That's the brilliance, it's not making them into something they're not, it's just bringing out the best bits of a person
This is really amazing I'm so glad you spoke on this. I love the show and do find it entertaining and inspiring, but over time the capitalism of it has become grating. My least favorite is when they show up at someone's house and give them a hard time for their "pre-makeover" life. Granted, it's nowhere near as bad as makeover shows of the 2000-2010s (I remember the way they ridiculed contestants on What Not To Wear), but they do this poverty porn of "oh my gosh you live like this?!" Yes, they do live like this.
I do agree all of the Fab Five seem to show genuine care and use their talents to help people get some of the resources to "get out of their funks" but the framing of the show needs a rework. It would benefit the heros and the audience to not make care and quality of life seem so individualistic and consumerist. That's a critique on lots of American culture. *le shrug*
👁 More eyeballs will arrive shortly
Have we entered 👁️ The 👁️ Eyeball 👁️ Zone 👁️ ? 👁️
Indeeed👁👁👁
they said 👁👁
8:40 Just realized that's a piano rendition of Basket Case playing in the background lol
Oooh, nice detail!
I caught that too and was like what the heck is that cover. Nice.
In the US, you aren't allowed to be sick, mentally sick or happy, unless your wealthy. They reason this by saying that this is the only way to give people incentives to improve themselves but it ignores the fact that they simply want cheap labor to increase their wealth.
I never watched the previous Queer Eye show. Started watching this version because of Karamo. From that first episode, it was obvious that he genuinely cared about the people with whom he was interacting. The others don't. Yes, they do their jobs, but there was no real difference in how they treated each set of people they met. It was all the same, whereas Karamo seemed to SEE each person as an individual. He was making a difference. That is laudable.
I love how being poor changes my experiences of the world entirely.
At the beginning of the video, when he went "when was the last time you bought something expensive, just to make yourself happy?" I thought bout the vegan cheese I bought two days ago.
Beautiful video. The choice of calming backing music is is so valuable and often overlooked, same reason I continue to watch D'Angelo Wallace, subbing for the quality content and not stressful presentation.
Thank you so much, I've been trying to put more consideration into the of kind of music I use in my videos, so it's great to hear that. I promise you my next video on loneliness in Japan will also be a chill experience
I swear Karamo could slap me across the face and still somehow cure my anxiety
"Changing your environment can be an important part of personal change. A comfort zone can be damaging in a long-term if it doesn't allow for personal growth especially if you're not willing to welcome people into it" 9:20
What you said about the home makeover makes me think of the episode with Kenny (in season 4, he was the guy with a Croatian background). He was living in his parents home, and everything was covered with dust that hadn't been cleaned in years. Kenny was really close with his family, I bet it would have been meaningful to get the whole family together and spend a weekend or 2, cleaning and organizing the house. They could go through all the old stuff and share memories. Verses just showing up to a husk of your family home like a vampire had sucked out all the personality.
Came here through RUclips's recommended videos and I'm happy I clicked in! You totally nailed what felt a bit off about the show, as much as I love it.
RUclips recommended this to me. Glad I clicked, such a great video!
I'm curious on your take of the episode that occurred in Japan. It bothered me quite a bit and put me off the show (i once adored). They basically told the man "Just go out and be a gay man!" The situation was so trivialized and presented as though the solution was: "Just do what you want." How they've decided they are experts on Japanese culture is beyond me. It's a very complex, controversial subject in a very uptight culture. Their advice was curt and unrealistic.
my mum was in extreme poverty for most of her life and my father always taught me the value of money and hard work since he had to work to support his family, even at a young age. They always taught me about how consumerism and products can never bring happiness, only the connections that we make. I have not seen Queer Eye, truth be told, and I doubt I will now. American society conditions us to think we can't be happy as long as we have the desire for something nice or expensive, and that desire will never go away as long as we subscribe ourselves to those ideas.
I think more people need to see this video.
I too was sent by the eyeballs. Thank you for a thoughtful analysis of my favourite guilty pleasure. Karamo really is amazing.
👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 The eyeballs have sent us 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
truly a moving piece, thank you so much for making this.
I've always liked the idea of helping others. If something's weighing on my mind & I can't find a solution I look for a distraction. Instead of wasting time on a useless activity, I think of who I can reach out to for a mini challenge. It clears my thoughts, changes my energy to positive, productive vibrations & opens my connection to intuitive creativity. Even helping someone overcome a small obstacle can make a huge impact & the reward of feeling happy is long lasting. Both giver & receiver can take focus off of their respective life frustrations, break though their pattern of feeling stuck & share an uplifting experience of achieving progress. Returning to my issue, the answer came easily. It's a win-win situation.
Praise to the Eyeballs!
I totally agree with your take on the show, and honestly, I think this is as good as something like this could get under capitalism. A bunch of good-natured guys constructively trowing their production company's money at a problem and showing how you should throw your money at your own problems in a similarly constructive way. The later seasons seem to be leaning more into Karamo's therapist qualifications and affordable clothes, which is great and I hope it keeps going into it. I might be poor and working 40 hrs a week at a physically demanding job, but taking a few more minutes for my personal care routine does seem to improve my mood despite my mandated uniform and achey joints. I'm very lucky to have a therapist who waives her fees to make sure I can keep seeing her despite me having Medicaid, so I can afford some of the other guidance the show gives from time to time, or just apply it to stuff I already own. QE is a good way of breaking the ice, in a way, of convincing you to take better care of yourself while still being at least a bit feasible under our capitalist society, especially for men and more emotionally-downtrodden people
Thank you, this really changed my perspective of the show. I love your voice!
Thank you! I'm pretty insecure about my voice, so that's very nice to hear.
Eyeballs! Great analysis, I've had this gripe with the show. Loved noticing No Surprises in the background
I like how my algorithm now leads me to things like this.
This is a bit off-topic, but I really needed to thank you for that line around 13:00 about how it's cruel to open up wounds and then leave a person to deal with them on their own. It helped recontextualize some stuff in my own life I've been struggling with. So thank you for that. Anyway, great video overall!
Shocked this channel has so few subs. I just binged every video. Great job on the editing!
My favorite episode is probably the episode with Wesley because most of the home makeover was about making his place accessible for him. Getting a ramp installed and having a kitchen that you can actually use are things that many disabled folks need but can’t afford the renovation needed. Many “accessible housing programs” don’t have fully accessible apartments. Or they’re in houses with stairs. The resources available to disabled folks in need of accessible housing are few and far between. So seeing a disabled persons home be renovated into something accessible was honestly pretty beautiful. I wish there was more episodes like that. If they’re going to use their budget for renovations I think it should be more focused on making someone’s daily life easier and meeting their actual needs.
This came up on my recommended feed and I enjoyed this a lot! Also, your take on Karamo Brown and hearing that he keeps in touch with them - maybe it’s been a long day, but hearing it in your reassuring tone made me get a little teary-eyed.
I pretty much agree with all the points. One area I previous looked at differently regarding the home improvement and clothes was that some of the people seem to have low self esteem, and might not think of themselves as deserving. The gifting of the wardrobe and new home could then be seen as “why wouldn’t you be, here’s this massive gift we think you deserve”.
On that note though, the self esteem issue is likely not going to be resolved through an external material gift, so I’m not really sure if it will have the desired impact...
There's a video where the Fab 5 take a lie detector test and Karamo is asked if he is the "culture" expert of the group, and he responds "No." It passed as true. I understand why now..
An eye is upon you, staring straight down and keenly through
Seeing all that you are and everything you can never be
Yes, an eye is upon you; an eye ready to blink
So face forward, with arms wide open and mind reeling
Your future has arrived
Are you ready to go?"
Regarding the Karamo part. One small distinction I would like to make, he is correct in that aiding them is good as he is trained in doing so, but I don't believe you can "open them up to something and then leave them". Their values, escapism, trauma, depression, anxieties, or whatever it may be, is ever-present. Just because you're hiding or not acknowledging something doesn't mean it's not a part of you or regulating your behavior.
What the actual meaning is of course opening up to the pain of existence, but such a pain was felt indirectly regardless. If you are coping with something through escapism, it's not like you're not suffering, you're just suffering in a different way. It would be cruel to open them up to the pain on tv, and it would be cruel to open them up to the pain and then leave them with no bettering course when you have one available, but this was already where they were at. If these people are stuck in a rut, they were exactly experiencing the pain with the knowledge that they didn't know how to improve it.
You got these eyeballs.
I like the show and watched it all but even as I was watching it, I was a bit bothered by how often it came down to this person just needed a giant suit case of cash.
@@selene7010 Temporarily. It's a band-aid. Universal healthcare is really the biggest thing that would have helped most of these people.
@@Aster_Risk Both tbh. UBI and M4A would make much healthier citizens able to contribute to society and enjoy life without needing to fuck others over to become millionaires.
Thanks for being impartial. Queer Eye has its issues but its a million times better than the other ones out there. :)
I'm here from the eyeball zone. This was a well done, insightful video. I'm glad I decided to check it out!
Thanks, Salari! 💖
I had no idea of Karamo's background. Thanks for emphasizing that here. I love what he does for the show and I've loved what he's done since his MTV days. An inspiration in Timbs to many of us!
The eyeball lords have sent me and I'm pleased (as always, the eyeball lords know better)
Liked for the Carlin ref. What a legend.
I really loathe when the Fab 5 go through the poor person's home, taking the piss out of their stuff. It is such a violation and not funny at all to laugh at someone's expense. I enjoy the rest of the show and it can be very uplifting when you are feeling low. I think its nice that they now have the "culture" expert do some mental health work with the person they're helping but it could go so much further. Really the show never questions why a makeover show is necessary - in a functioning society in which people make a fair income, it wouldn't take a reality show intervention for working class people to enjoy a comfortable living situation. Plus if you like wearing trackie pants and tee shirts, I say wear whatever the fuck you want. We only get one life, why spend it stressing about the way you look or what other people think of you.
Small point but I love the therapist voice you have for your videos. I actually started doing mindfulness meditation to your videos at night!
Haha, I've never been told I have a therapist voice before, but I appreciate the compliment! You'll love my next video then, it's the longest one yet.
I kind of think QE COULD work if someone cleaned the dishes while that episodes subject was in a therapy session. I can't remember the name of it, but there was a British show that did just that: went into messy homes and cleaned them from top to bottom and shared cleaning and tidying tips with the person along the way. It was so satisfying to see a small home or flat that just looked a dump be cleaned and polished up. Same furniture, same decor. Learning to curate a room with the items you already have would surely be fun to watch.
How clean is your house
@@sophielarts pretty clean most of the time. I actually enjoy cleaning and tidying and I don't function well with lots of mess and clutter.
I also just love the idea of teaching people design elements using what they already have. Growing up we didn't have much money but my mum loved to decorate and primp, but rarely bought new things. She had a little collection of decor and she would regularly reorganise rooms and decor for different looks rather than buying new stuff. It must have rubbed off a little because now I usually think about what I already own when changing up a living space before considering buying anything new.
@@kmac7302 no no so sorry I was tired and didn't clarify oh gosh, I think that's the name of the show you were referring to but I'm glad to know your house is clean
@@kmac7302 also that's a great way of going about things and pretty similar in that way of do with what you have first it's a great way of being creative and producing less waste and saving money
@@sophielarts lol, I'm running on no sleep right now too! The show is called how clean is your house!
I loved it!
I just feel like having a nice living space is important, but having particular things isn't. You could make a pile of pebbles you found in the park look aesthetic if you have some elements of design and creativity. If you can learn to arrange with what you have them you will know when you see something new that is worth it to you to spend money on rather than buying random items to fill a space.
I saw this video a while ago when procrastinating. Then, I got an assignment for college and my mind automatically went to this, so I quoted your video in it and it was very helpful.
I just wanted to say thak you for that I guess lmao, stay cool ❤
This is the kind of nice commentary that I think it's the level of respect and criticism incredibly well. It's something I wish was even shown to the people who work on this show, but in all fairness I feel they might already know it themselves and the level of complexity to even start change is far to insane
"The need to make incremental changes while at the same time trying not to be overwhelmed by the stresses of modern life." With all the habit making pressure we get to be better at everything, our work, our hobbies, our personal life etc... This the only habit I have decided to set for myself. The issue with a habit is that we feel it has to be a daily one otherwise we couldn't dare declare we have this habit. But recently I've learnt to see less in black and white and accepts the greys of my life. These shows encourages these ponctual gigantic changes in our life when we should really learn to be the wheel of our own lives : observe the path we seek and make the tiny adjustments to make sure we go in the right direction and not lose ourselves and the ones who rides with us.
Watching this makes me so glad that my home is basically a hole where I can be safe from having to be in the eye, and I wouldn't want to turn it into some fucking shop window where I can display my awesome personality, unique taste and the status I'm trying to aim for
The eyeballs send their regards.
And this video is tops!
I always wondered if karamo just left those folks alone after busting all their trauma wide open. Glad he's actually responsible.
Ok, but how dare you playing with my feelings with that no surprises piano arrangement???
This was my first video of yours and its so good. This show was both very enjoyable and also very uncomfortable, so glad someone is talking about whats so weird and off about it. I hope as many people see this as possible 👁👁
This is the best channel I've come to know in the last year or so. When I saw your video on why are the Japanese so lonely, I immediately recognized it for the masterpiece that it is, and shared it with a couple friends (I'm Brazilian, sadly not everyone has access to English-language content). But then I went on to watch some of your older videos, and I thought them... nothing special. Like, ok, good, nice video essays on various topics, including pop culture, yadda yadda. I mean, the channel's premise isn't exactly new or anything, and I didn't expect it to be revolutionary; but I thought it sure wasn't the sake quality, the same ammount of research, depth, data and care on conveying the messages intended as in tha Japanese video.
But then recently I stopped to watch some of your new stuff, since that fateful vid, and bruh, that's the stuff. That's the truth. This is it. This is what I wanna listen. The thoughtful, attentious research, writing and delivery. The anticapitalism not necessarily displaying socialist theory (not that I have anything against that, but more theretical videos tend to push away people who aren't already accepting to the idea). We sure need more capable communicators with a reach such as yours, to deliver what people need to hear and to think about, in the subtle, tender and thorough way that you do.
Thank you, Salari.
a really really great video essay. i have never watched the show and thanks to you i proved to myself that such projects are still just tv shows