Yes you do!!! Womens incarceration rate is so much higher in Oklahoma as well as grandparents raising grandchildren as of 2018. I don't know where we stand statistically now.. but I didn't even get underwear for a month! Also, the women's jail in the county I live in was supposed to be condemned YEARS ago.. it's still up and running and SO overcrowded. There HAS to be a better solution. I love what you do and will always be a ROD ❤️❤️
Its terrifying to think of rape in prison no matter your gender but as a woman the idea that every assault to lead to a pregnancy you didnt choose and could be forced to carry even at a risk to your life is just so damn intimidating.
The risk of rape is clearly not the same. For a male prisoner they could be penetrated by any other prisoner, for women it's only if there happens to be a corrupt guard and he's not exactly going to rape the whole prison.
Are the women raped by the guards because how would they get pregnant while in prison? That's horrible, those guards get money for their job and tgen commit crimes.
@@teijaflink2226 it’s sexual abuse regardless if the women “consent” because of the power disparity. They may feel that they can’t say no or even if they want to one time that they can’t say no after saying yes because of punishment or fear of reprisals.
A friend of mine who is a CO told me that in her province they don’t carry batons in womens facilities. Which I think reinforces your assessment of the different experiences men and women have. Neither is necessarily “worse”, just different.
Who has it harder in prison in timestamps: 1:54 gangs/family units 4:20 outside support 6:06 prison structures & policies 8:37 relationship with COs 10:16 reputation 11:43 mental health 13:20 missing your family 14:20 physiology and hygiene 16:18 relationship with inmates 17:25 sentencing
I actually love the empathy that shows if all your friends think the others have it easier, it's so easy to know that what we're going through sucks but being able to look across at someone else and think 'this is hard but I can't imagine having to deal with x y and z' just shows real compassion. Maybe it's a case of both sound terrible but your friends know they can survive what they went though but aren't sure how they'd do on the other side? Cause god knows I don't know how I'd cope with either. Like I think both are horribly hard my first thoughts were that men's prison sounds horribly violent and the idea of being turned out is just horrendous. But then women's prison seems to be where all the sexual abuse from guards and chaplains occurs, and pregnancy and birth in prison sounds terrifying so that's horrific too. Hearing you talk about the isolation, and how prisons aren't set up for women just makes me realise how many tiny petty ways prisons make inmates lives worse in ways I just hadn't considered. While I can sit here and know that i's awful there's just no way for me to truly understand what some of you have been through. It's like choosing between two absolutely horrible but slightly different and a bit unknown options.
Bless you Jess, for doing what you gotta do no matter WHAT 💯 🙌 Whether having hard conversations on YT, getting people motivated to make a diff... or addressing the hard conversations at home 😣 Stay strong, stay sober, you're a Warrior too !!! 🖤❤🧡💛💚💙💜🖤
My mom and I both work in our local ER. She’s a nurse and got an inmate from our county jail. The patient was on her period and had to take her tampon out. We don’t have tampons we just have pads in our ER. The guard wouldn’t allow my mother to give her mesh underwear to use with a pad. He made the inmate just free bleed until she got back to the jail. Blew my freaking mind because the mesh underwear is so thin like a hairnet. you wouldn’t think it would matter.
I have a friend who is in prison and has been in and out a few times. In medium security he has a boom box in his cell. He has a full gym, a tablet, and there is even a recording studio. He even said the food is pretty good. He also can take a bunch of classes from woodworking, to leather work and so forth. He says jail sucks but as long as you behave in prison he said it's not too bad at all. He said anything higher than medium security really sucks because they focus a lot less on rehabilitation and more of being locked up. But that is just his experience and prisons can be pretty different depending on where you go.
It depends. As a guy I can say that if I was really big and strong I wouldn't have it as difficult. so I could say women have it harder. But if I was weak physically and mentally, prison would be more hell as a man than a woman.
The female prison I used to work in used to be a Men's prison at one point. A lot of officers would act tough and talk s*** to the female inmates and I know for a fact they sure as hell wouldn't have talked to the male inmates like that! It definitely happens a lot
It was really interesting to hear the different points from both sides. I don’t know how it’s almost 2023 and women still can’t get easy access to tampons and pads! And chaining women to a bed during childbirth is absolutely barbaric! Where the “F” word are you freaking going to go for gosh sake? I hope you and the girls are doing good 👍 tell Reese I’m pulling for him.
@@meahdahlgren6537 are you stupid? 11 months ago was almost 2023 😂 LMFAO how did you read this comment and think nope a couple months isn't enough??? Like please explain your way of thinking I'm so confused
Before watching, I believe prison isn't about which is worse for each gender. Prison is misused for both genders, and affects all people in different ways. Trauma is trauma.
In county jail the men def had it easier. They always said it's a man's jail. When women are in the hallway we had to turn around and look at the wall and not talk. The men could stand there talking, hollaring at us, walk in a group instead of a line. It was because the women guards were on more of a power trip. Also the men always got more stuff brought in to them. We would lose our TV's and phones and the men would just raise hell until they got it back. We couldn't. For one the women wouldn't stick together, like you said, but for two there were way more men than women. They would just take us to the tank if we did that. Men got their food first and hotter. They got the new part of the jail with the better cells. They never had to be strip searched when they came in from the yard and we did. But we did get the better yard. Their yard sucked.
This is some real talk Thank YOU for ALL YOU do to Enlighten those who are in the dark about the struggle those locked up go thru. I would Love to team up with YOU & share content & wake up folks about how Bad the System is here. I am in Oklahoma & I am trying to get myself out of this Matrix of Bs that is Nothing besides a Money racket. I noticed today that another inmate died in one of our worst jails here. I have a mental health background & I am passionate about reform. Thank YOU again for ALL the Knowledge YOU share. Peace & Blessing.
Amazing perspective and very nicely done Jess. My gut response would have been that women have it harder, purely because of the systemic issues that you've talked about in your other videos. It's probably very common for most people to simply write off prison struggles for both genders by saying, "Too bad, don't break the law." Hearing your story and your pov of what prison struggle is actually like, has certainly helped me understand why the response is just not that simple in a lot of cases.
Something male inmates will never have to deal with is being shackled to the hospital bed while giving birth. While I hate playing "who has it worse," I introduce the idea that trans women have it hardest in prison. Cis men is correct. It's a shortened version of cisgender. It's the opposite of transgender. I've heard trans men gets lots of sexual attention by the women.
Trans women are males, and they, like other men will also never deal with being shackled to the hospital bed while giving birth, bloodying their pants during menstruation, and being separated from children shortly after giving birth. Many of them are also just as strong as any other man and can hold their own when push comes to shove, esp. in prison and esp. when pitted against the average female. A lot of people just like to introduce this idea of transwomen being the most oppressed individuals on earth because it's trendy and "woke". But the truth is they are still male and will always have those advantages over females, no matter whether they socially or physically transition.
I’ve been watching your videos for years now. Watching you now, I just find it so hard to imagine you in prison! You are such a down to earth, intelligent, caring woman. I just can’t imagine you in that prison setting. You have come so far - I hope you know how many people are proud of you! ❤
My friend in Illinois is a male CO in a women's prison. He convinced the Warden that if she allows inmates to purchase more tampons at the commissary, that fighting will stop, because some of the ladies will steal from each other & he's done writing paper work whenever there's a fight because of tampons being the cause. The winning argument was bloody bed sheets are a health issue. So to replace them if the blood stains can't be removed will cost more than the tampons.
I like your conclusion. Comparing trauma is rarely helpful. I prefer to look and say that our prison systems are generally pretty awful and need some work to help everybody. Male and Female.
You presented both sides very well. There are plenty of other ways the government can cut spending without forcing people in prison to go without basic necessities. My step dad was a prison guard it was disgusting the way he trashed the men in prison. He wasn't exactly an honest person either, just knew how to not get caught. One of his buddies was demoted for forcing inmates to cook his food. Should have been fired for that.
I hope your day is going good i love all your videos but this one is going to have to be one of the top faves for the fact of the amount of support/respect you have to the trans community and the amount of help you have been able to do within motivating me to get on my road to recovery along wit the amount of support/inspiration you have given me to be sober Ps you were right it is cis male and much love and support from your trans babies ❤️🔥
The psychological breakdown in this video is impressive. Jess you shed so much light on the fundamental psychological differences between male and female imprisonment. Thank you:) valuable and truly fascinating
My uncle is a recently retired CO and he mostly work the men's side but would work the women's side when they were short handed. He said the women acted crazy and he couldn't wait until he could go back to the men's side. Apparently the men were he was are calmer. 😂
This reminds me of a question I ask people and most people are surprised by the real answer with facts to back it up. I totally agree with your answer.
I did 5 years. I think you nailed it. And you reminded me if something I witnessed while I was locked up. Lady in my unit goes into labor. Full term/heavily pregnant. The CO doesn't believe her. Hours go by. She starts to crown. The CO calls medical and 911. We get her into a wheelchair and they roll her out of the unit to meet the ambulance in the sally-port. On the way down the ramp to the ambulance, the baby comes out....lands on the ramp, the medical CO gets the umbilical cord wrapped in the wheel of the wheelchair.... it was a whole shitshow of epic proportions. Luckily the mom and baby both made it through safe because of the EMTs. Or the time another lady begged the COs for her insulin for hours and was told to wait for pill cart. Goes into a diabetic coma and dies. I watched EMTs roll her out on a gurny and cried my eyes out. Or my friend who was given sanctions and was forced to scrub baseboards. She told the COs she felt odd and needed to go to Medical. They refused. She dropped dead from a major stroke right there in the hallway. Prison is hell. They treat inmates like cattle. Actually. I come from a cattle ranch and they were treated far better than inmates are.
@Michael Allen Idaho at Pocatello Women's Correctional Center. If they were reprimanded in any way for any of the situations I listed; it wasn't enough that they lost their jobs because they kept coming in to work their shifts. I do know that the family of the woman who died from a diabetic coma sued the stars out of IDOC though. And they won that lawsuit. But it was just civil and nobody faced criminal charges.
@@heidimedel It's unbelievable. I had to quit being a CO because I cared. Got tired of going home and breaking down. And if you care, you're called a "hug a thug." Most people end up in the pen because they have unresolved and untreated trauma. Then they get stuffed together around other people who have the same problem just to be further traumatized. It's a sick joke.
Thank you for your diligence in getting these videos out! Thank you for your positive attitude and focus on your message! Thank you for being such a wonderful example of overcoming the bad you did and becoming a better you! I love you! ❤
Hey Jessica! Fairly new here to your channel. I am so very much pleased to see that you actually have the suicide hotline number up on your video info. This is very helpful for suicide prevention. When these times are very different and for some hard to live through. Thank you for putting that out there ♥️ Most of all I enjoy watching your videos.
Thank you Jess, Very informative & I know you are helping somebody out there (lots) just by what you do & say! God bless you and your family 💞🙏💪 Much love, Stay safe, healthy, happy and blessed!
Great video, One of the few times I cried in jail I was talking to the psychiatrist she asked if I loved myself I couldn't help put shed a tears, I never thought of it b4, And in the pod b4 u go to the block, im not very intimidating a big dude was my cell mate, and cried for his kids, I felt bad, but u don't see crying much in male jails
Hey Jessica! I’m fairly new to this channel and appreciate learning from you about prison reform! Have you ever reacted to any 60 Days In episodes? Keep doing great things and advocating for change!
I'm so grateful that I no longer have to worry about periods since I got a hysterectomy. I would have a problem with the fact that I have celiac disease though. I am afraid they would cross contaminate all my food or not accommodate me at all.
The period product thing is so dehumanizing. In addition, it's also a health issue. If you are overflowing your sanitary products that means that there is blood that other people could potentially come into contact with. Not saying that everyone in prison has a communicable disease, not at all, but the likelihood that at least one person in there could possibly have one is high. The facts are that an overwhelming amount of inmates are there because of addiction and a lot of addicts do pick up illnesses due either sharing or re using needles or the terrible conditions that a lot of addicts are staying in. No judgment to these people, I've seen addiction up close and have seen it take over the lives of some of my family members. They aren't bad people, they are sick people. It's a constant struggle for them and it's heartbreaking, I've seen these people get sober and be sober for years and then in one moment of deep pain it's all down hill from there. But the reality is that having any kind of blood contact is no good whether you are in prison or not.
An easy way to remember the cis/trans part is knowing the Latin translation for each one. 'Trans' is 'on the opposite side,' (transport, translate, transparent, etc) cis is 'on the same side.' (incision, cisatlantic, etc)
I remember seeing the visitation scene in the movie Midnight Express, and I wonder now as I wondered then what part of his body, if any, Billy's girlfriend would have wanted to see if the situation were reversed.
I was surprised to find out that rape apparently happens in female prison, but then I remembered that men are allowed to be guards in female prison for some reason, so I guess that's how it happens.
Makes sense, now that you’ve broken it down. I agree with your perspective, you were there,& have a lot of male friends that have been incarcerated. You know both sides, from people who experienced the reality. Your take, is probably on target. Stay safe, healthy,& blessed.💯❤️👍🏾🤔🙋🏽♀️✝️🙏🏾🇺🇸
I LOVE you content Jessica. I’m in the UK🇬🇧and can’t believe the stories you tell. Completely unethical and inhumane. Prison reform is needed so badly in Americas prison system. It’s absolutely insane. We do have much easier prisons here that are based on rehabilitation. Well, more so than america.
Former CO here who’s worked both at a chick joint and with men. I’ll say it’s like comparing apples and oranges. As far as respect I felt men where more respectful I have to agree I’ve seen fellow CO’s bully the chicks way more than the men. You did an excellent job breaking this down the middle
In (UK) women's prisons we are further away from home. There's only 12 women's prisons here & you could end up being in a prison in the other side of the country, which makes its harder to keep in contact with family & friends via visits. In men's prisons you'll see girlfriends & wives packing out the visits hall, sending money in for his canteen, looks after the children & home, being a constant & reliable support, unlike in women's where you don't see many boyfriends or husbands in visits, some don't even bother writing or sending money for canteen, the men just don't have their partners backs. Also in women's prisons there's a lot more self harm, a high % of female prisoners have been victims of some sort of abuse at some point in their life. There's more mental health issues. Trauma, more women have personality disorders, so locking women up has more of a detrimental effect than it does in men. We can wear our own clothes, although there are prison issue clothes that you can wear if you want. We can have unlimited underwear. Men have to wear prison issue clothes. Women s prisons aren't violent like men's prisons. Yes there's fights, arguments, bullying, bitching etc, but not as bad as men. So much more I could add, but I'll be here for ages. Lol.
(Just started watching the video), but I wanted to say, I'm very surprised that your male friends thought women have it harder! I've never been to jail, but from what we hear (mostly about male prisons, admittedly) I would not hesitate one bit, and I'd 100% prefer to be in a woman prison (as a woman, obviously) than in a man prison as a man. I've also listened to a few male ex-convict youtubers, and the stories they talk about, even if only half of it is true, it 1000000000% reinforces my opinion of it. But let's see if this video changes my mind/gives me a different perspective!
I would be very interested in your thoughts about the show Inside the World's Toughest Prisons (it's on Netflix). Some of them make the US prison system look like Club Med but others make it look barbaric.
Women go 100x harder than dudes seen it myself the girls would catch doors open and run Accross the hall during chow time to attack some chick who cheated with their boyfriends or some shit seen that a couple times honestly it sucks for everyone but I believe women have it harder allot less options for schooling and what not
YOU ARE DOING SO WELL BEING RESPECTFUL!! Yes, it would be cis men who aren't having periods :) I, a trans man, do have a period. Cis simply means that you align with the gender you were assigned at birth! Trans means the opposite. For me personally it isn't hurtful to hear you talk generally about women having periods because commonly, it is women being impacted by inadequate reproductive healthcare. I just want you to know you are awesome for trying to be more inclusive and you never need to be perfect with it, anyone who cares can see your intention is positive and kind! Thank you for thinking of the trans/nonbinary community at all when talking about this stuff.
At Granite, Oklahoma State Reformatory (Gladiator school back in the late 70's to the late 90's), we actually had a CO said that he was glad that he got transferred to a male prison.
After doing 10yrs in Prison and 1 riot. Prisons are hard. The worst is the phones and visits. the last thing you need to hear is how hard life is on those friends and family that are not in Prison and this leads to violent issues occurring. It's much better to leave all that behind
Not even 2mins in and I can relate. I had my second baby crazy fast (less than an hour) and everyone says I have it lucky. In my mind, good god no was is even close to easy or being lucky.. I would much rather experience the day and a half labour like I had with my first tan ever experience a labour so quick again.. it was less than an hour and so traumatic for me…..
Women prison is Disneyland compared to Men's prison especially California. And I completely disagree about the guards being respectful towards men have you heard of gladiator school?
Me and my sons mother tried to figure this out since we both have spent some time upstate but we weren't able to really get a real idea about it because she was always in a lower custody unit than I was because I have some violent charges and have did all my time in a level 3 or 4 unit and ive never experienced a dorm or open environment while serving my time and she never experienced a 23hr lockdown so we couldn't get to a good answer from our own experience anyway
The fact that women can emotionally support each other more openly. So whatever happens in there they have very little ways to emotionally develop. Leading to them staying there and such.
i'd even argue that women should be able to get more than 7 pairs of underwear per week, cause what about period accidents? also just on the daily, we all have our vagina cleaning itself in there so wearing the same pair of underwear a second time is just NASTY cause you can feel the dried hardened discharge in there rubbing on you, not to mention the SMELL
Hey Jess, I really admire the work you've put into this channel and like your videos very much, so that's why I wanted to ask if you happen to know how accurate is the series vis a vis? Every time I watch something about prisom I wonder how much it resembles reality. Idk if you see this comment, but I've had that in mind for a while. Thank you again.
I got into some trouble when I was younger, when I was released they mailed my property back to me I got everything back exept my engagment ring. I went to the police station and an officer looked up the property and he said my engagment ring was in the truck and transported with with me. So I assumed it was one of the guirds that helped themselves to it. When I called them I can't remember what it was called they transfered my call to where they kept all the prisoners belongings and of course they couldn't find any records of my belongings.
I only did a relatively brief(4 year) term in Texas as a young adult and in my experience, if you had the heart to get out there and fight for yourself and a little bit of skill, that was going to be respected and you would be alright as long as you didnt gamble or argue over the goddamn TV. Granted I was in pretty decent shape when I got locked up because I had been in the service, but that was my experience. From what I've heard from women, its not really like that, especially if you are a small woman who isnt that physically imposing
I personally think that we should have different prisons or sections or some kind of programs within the prisons that vary based on the crime you commit. Prisoners should be working on whatever issues brought them there just like if were a rehab or mental Heath facility.
Can you believe Teresa Guidice got to do her time before her husband went in so her kids all above 3 wouldn’t have to be parentless & you couldn’t even give birth in a normal way.. like can you imagine the world of difference from judge to judge
On the topic of men saying females have it harder and vice versa, I would have to point out that they have never experienced the other genders prison life, meaning that it would sound worse to them since they've never been through it themselves, not saying that it's a massive difference, but the stories heard by others are typically exaggerated because of the adrenaline from witnessing or being a part of a conflict
The women prisons sound like Wentworth Prison. They had family structure. Also, please watch Wentworth and do truth and false with the tv show!!! You did it with orange is the new black. ❤️
When I've been on several Psych wards I was interested to find out that staff kept leaving the womens wards to go work with the men because they are easier to work with apparently! I was told that this is because women are a nightmare due to often being bitchy and sly which can lead to longer term disagreements that leave a horrible atmosphere whereas men will have a disagreement which can quickly result in arguements/fights then things are usually resolved and back to normal again! Loving your content, hi from the UK xx
@@LMD40 sounds pretty similar to psych ward, especially with my experience of the secure psych ward, as you've got to have eyes on the back of your head in order to survive.
I think it is based on the individual. Some people have easier times than others and some people make it hard on themselves in prison. I have only done county jail time. But I know females who went to prison and I have know males who went. Personally, my step son, adopt son and two of my son's went to prison.
Easier is requires an apples to apples. I don't have a monthly, I don't have a brain built around verbalization, largely due to socialization, I don't have guards figuring I am weak to begin with due to socialization. As a result, that looks way harder to me as a man.
It's hard as an outsider looking in and wanting to help. I've looked into how I could get more sanitary products for women into prisons, and no one, literally no one accepts donations. It comes down to complete prison reform, which sounds scary to alot of people. The best I could do was find an organization that offers aid to those recently released from prison- I sent a bunch of hygiene and women sanitary products there. It's a shame the prison system is profiting off of the dehumanization of people. I just didnt want someone to have to pay money for an extra pad.
EXAMPLE- My husband was in a county jail for 29 months and during that time he ran a “store” and would run the poker tables as well. His mama would put money on his books every week during her visits to see him. She never missed one visit. He even had to ask his mama to put money on my books because I was starving in the county jail where I served 24 months. My parents refused to put any money on my books unless it was for hygiene products. And by hygiene products I mean the basics- shampoo, conditioner, soap, body wash and deodorant. No extra anything. If I got lucky I would have enough left to buy three noodles and maybe two chips. I went to jail weighing 195lb and came home two years later weighing 140lb and didn't really work out or anything serious in jail. I would walk laps the pod and run stairs a few times a week for 20 or 30 minutes but that is it. I starved in county jail
I agree with you. Women and men have it harder in prison in different ways. It’s the same outside of prison. Men and women have it hard in different ways. I’ve always believed that men have it harder in life. I have to wonder if there are more women that agree with me than I think.
I did time in another country than you but a lot of the same points apply. The only big difference I noticed in that here, women get all the femenine hygiene stuff for free (and also they are allowed to have vibrators) whereas the men have to get everything from commissary (and they don't let fleshlights in because "they don't want to search it", despite no official policy against it)
Having been a correctional Officer in both men's and women's prisons, I say men have it harder in prison. But women do have their struggles that men don't.
The point of this video is to highlight the different struggles both men and women go through. That’s all.
My opinion is women and I haven't even watched it yet. Lol maybe it's just in Oklahoma
@@RaelynR92 oh my gosh I actually need to talk about Oklahomas prison system!
Yes you do!!! Womens incarceration rate is so much higher in Oklahoma as well as grandparents raising grandchildren as of 2018. I don't know where we stand statistically now.. but I didn't even get underwear for a month! Also, the women's jail in the county I live in was supposed to be condemned YEARS ago.. it's still up and running and SO overcrowded. There HAS to be a better solution. I love what you do and will always be a ROD ❤️❤️
I'll just call out my county if anyone wants to research! Lol Stephens county Oklahoma 😑
I definitely got crazy outside support from my ladies while I was locked up! And it made life a lot more human in there!
Its terrifying to think of rape in prison no matter your gender but as a woman the idea that every assault to lead to a pregnancy you didnt choose and could be forced to carry even at a risk to your life is just so damn intimidating.
The risk of rape is clearly not the same. For a male prisoner they could be penetrated by any other prisoner, for women it's only if there happens to be a corrupt guard and he's not exactly going to rape the whole prison.
That does happen and it’s very wrong very.
Having your anus wrecked to the point where you need stitches and surgery is very terrifying too.
Are the women raped by the guards because how would they get pregnant while in prison? That's horrible, those guards get money for their job and tgen commit crimes.
@@teijaflink2226 it’s sexual abuse regardless if the women “consent” because of the power disparity. They may feel that they can’t say no or even if they want to one time that they can’t say no after saying yes because of punishment or fear of reprisals.
A friend of mine who is a CO told me that in her province they don’t carry batons in womens facilities. Which I think reinforces your assessment of the different experiences men and women have. Neither is necessarily “worse”, just different.
And also every facility is different
You mention 'province' so I'm assuming Canada? A lot of variation in approaches across countries too.
in the united states, they definitely carry batons in women's prison, and some COs will hit you randomly with them.
But every prison is definitely different
Who has it harder in prison in timestamps:
1:54 gangs/family units
4:20 outside support
6:06 prison structures & policies
8:37 relationship with COs
10:16 reputation
11:43 mental health
13:20 missing your family
14:20 physiology and hygiene
16:18 relationship with inmates
17:25 sentencing
Thank you for staying nuetral and not turning it into a gender battle ❤
Yeah, I really appreciate that too. I find that it gives her observations and opinions more credibility.
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I actually love the empathy that shows if all your friends think the others have it easier, it's so easy to know that what we're going through sucks but being able to look across at someone else and think 'this is hard but I can't imagine having to deal with x y and z' just shows real compassion.
Maybe it's a case of both sound terrible but your friends know they can survive what they went though but aren't sure how they'd do on the other side? Cause god knows I don't know how I'd cope with either.
Like I think both are horribly hard my first thoughts were that men's prison sounds horribly violent and the idea of being turned out is just horrendous. But then women's prison seems to be where all the sexual abuse from guards and chaplains occurs, and pregnancy and birth in prison sounds terrifying so that's horrific too.
Hearing you talk about the isolation, and how prisons aren't set up for women just makes me realise how many tiny petty ways prisons make inmates lives worse in ways I just hadn't considered. While I can sit here and know that i's awful there's just no way for me to truly understand what some of you have been through. It's like choosing between two absolutely horrible but slightly different and a bit unknown options.
My thoughts exactly, too
Bless you Jess, for doing what you gotta do no matter WHAT 💯 🙌 Whether having hard conversations on YT, getting people motivated to make a diff... or addressing the hard conversations at home 😣 Stay strong, stay sober, you're a Warrior too !!! 🖤❤🧡💛💚💙💜🖤
My mom and I both work in our local ER. She’s a nurse and got an inmate from our county jail. The patient was on her period and had to take her tampon out. We don’t have tampons we just have pads in our ER. The guard wouldn’t allow my mother to give her mesh underwear to use with a pad. He made the inmate just free bleed until she got back to the jail. Blew my freaking mind because the mesh underwear is so thin like a hairnet. you wouldn’t think it would matter.
Or even just a pad without underwear then.
Was the guard in the ER with you?
would love to hear about male/ female experiences once out of prison. great video!
I could tell you mine
I have a friend who is in prison and has been in and out a few times. In medium security he has a boom box in his cell. He has a full gym, a tablet, and there is even a recording studio. He even said the food is pretty good. He also can take a bunch of classes from woodworking, to leather work and so forth.
He says jail sucks but as long as you behave in prison he said it's not too bad at all. He said anything higher than medium security really sucks because they focus a lot less on rehabilitation and more of being locked up.
But that is just his experience and prisons can be pretty different depending on where you go.
It depends. As a guy I can say that if I was really big and strong I wouldn't have it as difficult. so I could say women have it harder. But if I was weak physically and mentally, prison would be more hell as a man than a woman.
The female prison I used to work in used to be a Men's prison at one point. A lot of officers would act tough and talk s*** to the female inmates and I know for a fact they sure as hell wouldn't have talked to the male inmates like that! It definitely happens a lot
❤
It's not just female partners visiting male prisoners more -- apparently mothers, (female) relatives visit more as well.
It was really interesting to hear the different points from both sides. I don’t know how it’s almost 2023 and women still can’t get easy access to tampons and pads! And chaining women to a bed during childbirth is absolutely barbaric! Where the “F” word are you freaking going to go for gosh sake?
I hope you and the girls are doing good 👍 tell Reese I’m pulling for him.
No it's not almost 2023
@@meahdahlgren6537 are you stupid? 11 months ago was almost 2023 😂 LMFAO how did you read this comment and think nope a couple months isn't enough??? Like please explain your way of thinking I'm so confused
Before watching, I believe prison isn't about which is worse for each gender. Prison is misused for both genders, and affects all people in different ways. Trauma is trauma.
❤
In county jail the men def had it easier. They always said it's a man's jail. When women are in the hallway we had to turn around and look at the wall and not talk. The men could stand there talking, hollaring at us, walk in a group instead of a line. It was because the women guards were on more of a power trip. Also the men always got more stuff brought in to them. We would lose our TV's and phones and the men would just raise hell until they got it back. We couldn't. For one the women wouldn't stick together, like you said, but for two there were way more men than women. They would just take us to the tank if we did that. Men got their food first and hotter. They got the new part of the jail with the better cells. They never had to be strip searched when they came in from the yard and we did. But we did get the better yard. Their yard sucked.
Have you been to both?
This is some real talk Thank YOU for ALL YOU do to Enlighten those who are in the dark about the struggle those locked up go thru. I would Love to team up with YOU & share content & wake up folks about how Bad the System is here. I am in Oklahoma & I am trying to get myself out of this Matrix of Bs that is Nothing besides a Money racket. I noticed today that another inmate died in one of our worst jails here. I have a mental health background & I am passionate about reform. Thank YOU again for ALL the Knowledge YOU share. Peace & Blessing.
Amazing perspective and very nicely done Jess. My gut response would have been that women have it harder, purely because of the systemic issues that you've talked about in your other videos. It's probably very common for most people to simply write off prison struggles for both genders by saying, "Too bad, don't break the law." Hearing your story and your pov of what prison struggle is actually like, has certainly helped me understand why the response is just not that simple in a lot of cases.
Something male inmates will never have to deal with is being shackled to the hospital bed while giving birth. While I hate playing "who has it worse," I introduce the idea that trans women have it hardest in prison. Cis men is correct. It's a shortened version of cisgender. It's the opposite of transgender. I've heard trans men gets lots of sexual attention by the women.
I was thinking that men can't get pregnant in jail...
It was the first thing that went through my mind.
Trans women are males, and they, like other men will also never deal with being shackled to the hospital bed while giving birth, bloodying their pants during menstruation, and being separated from children shortly after giving birth. Many of them are also just as strong as any other man and can hold their own when push comes to shove, esp. in prison and esp. when pitted against the average female. A lot of people just like to introduce this idea of transwomen being the most oppressed individuals on earth because it's trendy and "woke". But the truth is they are still male and will always have those advantages over females, no matter whether they socially or physically transition.
Men with tits. There is no trans 😅
Men get shackled when having any medical procedure. That's equality!
@@user-mj7gm6gj9v equality doesn’t mean fair
I’ve been watching your videos for years now. Watching you now, I just find it so hard to imagine you in prison! You are such a down to earth, intelligent, caring woman. I just can’t imagine you in that prison setting. You have come so far - I hope you know how many people are proud of you! ❤
My friend in Illinois is a male CO in a women's prison. He convinced the Warden that if she allows inmates to purchase more tampons at the commissary, that fighting will stop, because some of the ladies will steal from each other & he's done writing paper work whenever there's a fight because of tampons being the cause.
The winning argument was bloody bed sheets are a health issue. So to replace them if the blood stains can't be removed will cost more than the tampons.
Here after 30 seconds!!!! Love you Jess I'm praying for yall right now!!!!
I like your conclusion. Comparing trauma is rarely helpful. I prefer to look and say that our prison systems are generally pretty awful and need some work to help everybody. Male and Female.
You presented both sides very well. There are plenty of other ways the government can cut spending without forcing people in prison to go without basic necessities. My step dad was a prison guard it was disgusting the way he trashed the men in prison. He wasn't exactly an honest person either, just knew how to not get caught. One of his buddies was demoted for forcing inmates to cook his food. Should have been fired for that.
That’s a very good way to get bodily fluid in your food
I hope your day is going good i love all your videos but this one is going to have to be one of the top faves for the fact of the amount of support/respect you have to the trans community and the amount of help you have been able to do within motivating me to get on my road to recovery along wit the amount of support/inspiration you have given me to be sober
Ps you were right it is cis male and much love and support from your trans babies ❤️🔥
The psychological breakdown in this video is impressive. Jess you shed so much light on the fundamental psychological differences between male and female imprisonment. Thank you:) valuable and truly fascinating
Jess do more storytimes. There definitely my favorite!!
My uncle is a recently retired CO and he mostly work the men's side but would work the women's side when they were short handed. He said the women acted crazy and he couldn't wait until he could go back to the men's side. Apparently the men were he was are calmer. 😂
@@LMD40 They were both prison though.
@@LMD40 Virginia, I can't remember what it's called. I'll have to ask.
@L FDCs such as SeaTac house both women and men. While it is a detention center it is still ran like a prison politics and all
It’s so sad that prison is the punishment but they deprive people in prison. Thank you for talking about this.
I feel like u Made very logical points and in my experience I agree with your takes on each situation
It's women
Not only dealing with periods but also pregnancy too
That's so generous of the men saying that about women and women about men. 💯
This reminds me of a question I ask people and most people are surprised by the real answer with facts to back it up. I totally agree with your answer.
I did 5 years. I think you nailed it.
And you reminded me if something I witnessed while I was locked up.
Lady in my unit goes into labor. Full term/heavily pregnant. The CO doesn't believe her. Hours go by. She starts to crown. The CO calls medical and 911. We get her into a wheelchair and they roll her out of the unit to meet the ambulance in the sally-port. On the way down the ramp to the ambulance, the baby comes out....lands on the ramp, the medical CO gets the umbilical cord wrapped in the wheel of the wheelchair.... it was a whole shitshow of epic proportions. Luckily the mom and baby both made it through safe because of the EMTs.
Or the time another lady begged the COs for her insulin for hours and was told to wait for pill cart. Goes into a diabetic coma and dies. I watched EMTs roll her out on a gurny and cried my eyes out.
Or my friend who was given sanctions and was forced to scrub baseboards. She told the COs she felt odd and needed to go to Medical. They refused. She dropped dead from a major stroke right there in the hallway.
Prison is hell. They treat inmates like cattle. Actually. I come from a cattle ranch and they were treated far better than inmates are.
@Heidi Medel ... Do you know what disciplinary measures were taken against the staff who were responsible for it? What state was this in?
@Michael Allen Idaho at Pocatello Women's Correctional Center. If they were reprimanded in any way for any of the situations I listed; it wasn't enough that they lost their jobs because they kept coming in to work their shifts. I do know that the family of the woman who died from a diabetic coma sued the stars out of IDOC though. And they won that lawsuit. But it was just civil and nobody faced criminal charges.
@@heidimedel It's unbelievable. I had to quit being a CO because I cared. Got tired of going home and breaking down. And if you care, you're called a "hug a thug." Most people end up in the pen because they have unresolved and untreated trauma. Then they get stuffed together around other people who have the same problem just to be further traumatized. It's a sick joke.
Thank you for all of the facts and helping us see the reality of the prison system. You’re brilliant :)
Thank you for your diligence in getting these videos out!
Thank you for your positive attitude and focus on your message!
Thank you for being such a wonderful example of overcoming the bad you did and becoming a better you!
I love you! ❤
Here for it, omg three pairs a week! you always teach me things and just love listened to ya. Xoxo hope it’s a good day today.
Thank you Jess for everything you do. Destigmatizing this stuff is the way to go.
Hey Jessica! Fairly new here to your channel. I am so very much pleased to see that you actually have the suicide hotline number up on your video info. This is very helpful for suicide prevention. When these times are very different and for some hard to live through. Thank you for putting that out there ♥️ Most of all I enjoy watching your videos.
Thank you Jess, Very informative & I know you are helping somebody out there (lots) just by what you do & say! God bless you and your family 💞🙏💪 Much love, Stay safe, healthy, happy and blessed!
Great video,
One of the few times I cried in jail I was talking to the psychiatrist she asked if I loved myself I couldn't help put shed a tears, I never thought of it b4,
And in the pod b4 u go to the block, im not very intimidating a big dude was my cell mate, and cried for his kids, I felt bad, but u don't see crying much in male jails
Hey Jessica! I’m fairly new to this channel and appreciate learning from you about prison reform! Have you ever reacted to any 60 Days In episodes? Keep doing great things and advocating for change!
I'm so grateful that I no longer have to worry about periods since I got a hysterectomy. I would have a problem with the fact that I have celiac disease though. I am afraid they would cross contaminate all my food or not accommodate me at all.
thank you for acknowledging stereotypes while making this but also not reinforcing them at the same time. this is an interesting viddo
This is so interesting, you have the most amazing way of talking and your voice and manner is lovely.
I love that you're making more videos now. Really enjoying them 😁💖
The period product thing is so dehumanizing. In addition, it's also a health issue. If you are overflowing your sanitary products that means that there is blood that other people could potentially come into contact with. Not saying that everyone in prison has a communicable disease, not at all, but the likelihood that at least one person in there could possibly have one is high. The facts are that an overwhelming amount of inmates are there because of addiction and a lot of addicts do pick up illnesses due either sharing or re using needles or the terrible conditions that a lot of addicts are staying in. No judgment to these people, I've seen addiction up close and have seen it take over the lives of some of my family members. They aren't bad people, they are sick people. It's a constant struggle for them and it's heartbreaking, I've seen these people get sober and be sober for years and then in one moment of deep pain it's all down hill from there. But the reality is that having any kind of blood contact is no good whether you are in prison or not.
An easy way to remember the cis/trans part is knowing the Latin translation for each one. 'Trans' is 'on the opposite side,' (transport, translate, transparent, etc) cis is 'on the same side.' (incision, cisatlantic, etc)
I remember seeing the visitation scene in the movie Midnight Express, and I wonder now as I wondered then what part of his body, if any, Billy's girlfriend would have wanted to see if the situation were reversed.
It's funny how Empaths end up in prison. Like me, like you. Good people in bad places...learning things the hardest of ways
I was surprised to find out that rape apparently happens in female prison, but then I remembered that men are allowed to be guards in female prison for some reason, so I guess that's how it happens.
Makes sense, now that you’ve broken it down. I agree with your perspective, you were there,& have a lot of male friends that have been incarcerated. You know both sides, from people who experienced the reality. Your take, is probably on target. Stay safe, healthy,& blessed.💯❤️👍🏾🤔🙋🏽♀️✝️🙏🏾🇺🇸
I LOVE you content Jessica. I’m in the UK🇬🇧and can’t believe the stories you tell. Completely unethical and inhumane. Prison reform is needed so badly in Americas prison system. It’s absolutely insane. We do have much easier prisons here that are based on rehabilitation. Well, more so than america.
Former CO here who’s worked both at a chick joint and with men. I’ll say it’s like comparing apples and oranges. As far as respect I felt men where more respectful I have to agree I’ve seen fellow CO’s bully the chicks way more than the men. You did an excellent job breaking this down the middle
In (UK) women's prisons we are further away from home. There's only 12 women's prisons here & you could end up being in a prison in the other side of the country, which makes its harder to keep in contact with family & friends via visits.
In men's prisons you'll see girlfriends & wives packing out the visits hall, sending money in for his canteen, looks after the children & home, being a constant & reliable support, unlike in women's where you don't see many boyfriends or husbands in visits, some don't even bother writing or sending money for canteen, the men just don't have their partners backs.
Also in women's prisons there's a lot more self harm, a high % of female prisoners have been victims of some sort of abuse at some point in their life. There's more mental health issues. Trauma, more women have personality disorders, so locking women up has more of a detrimental effect than it does in men.
We can wear our own clothes, although there are prison issue clothes that you can wear if you want. We can have unlimited underwear.
Men have to wear prison issue clothes.
Women s prisons aren't violent like men's prisons. Yes there's fights, arguments, bullying, bitching etc, but not as bad as men.
So much more I could add, but I'll be here for ages. Lol.
(Just started watching the video), but I wanted to say, I'm very surprised that your male friends thought women have it harder!
I've never been to jail, but from what we hear (mostly about male prisons, admittedly) I would not hesitate one bit, and I'd 100% prefer to be in a woman prison (as a woman, obviously) than in a man prison as a man.
I've also listened to a few male ex-convict youtubers, and the stories they talk about, even if only half of it is true, it 1000000000% reinforces my opinion of it.
But let's see if this video changes my mind/gives me a different perspective!
It would be interesting to hear why your friends think the way they do.
Thanks for the video! Interesting, heartbreaking stuff. Glad you've made it out! Keep it up!
I would be very interested in your thoughts about the show Inside the World's Toughest Prisons (it's on Netflix). Some of them make the US prison system look like Club Med but others make it look barbaric.
I hope you are having a good day
Women go 100x harder than dudes seen it myself the girls would catch doors open and run Accross the hall during chow time to attack some chick who cheated with their boyfriends or some shit seen that a couple times honestly it sucks for everyone but I believe women have it harder allot less options for schooling and what not
Tell it to guards working in pelican bay state prison.
Schooling? In prison?
@@Myself-yf5do not anymore
YOU ARE DOING SO WELL BEING RESPECTFUL!! Yes, it would be cis men who aren't having periods :) I, a trans man, do have a period. Cis simply means that you align with the gender you were assigned at birth! Trans means the opposite.
For me personally it isn't hurtful to hear you talk generally about women having periods because commonly, it is women being impacted by inadequate reproductive healthcare. I just want you to know you are awesome for trying to be more inclusive and you never need to be perfect with it, anyone who cares can see your intention is positive and kind! Thank you for thinking of the trans/nonbinary community at all when talking about this stuff.
At Granite, Oklahoma State Reformatory (Gladiator school back in the late 70's to the late 90's), we actually had a CO said that he was glad that he got transferred to a male prison.
Did he say why?
I agree that it’s neutral and I love all the points you brought up! Keep being you and being strong! Love you!♥️
i’m so happy to see such positive comments here
After doing 10yrs in Prison and 1 riot. Prisons are hard. The worst is the phones and visits. the last thing you need to hear is how hard life is on those friends and family that are not in Prison and this leads to violent issues occurring. It's much better to leave all that behind
Not even 2mins in and I can relate. I had my second baby crazy fast (less than an hour) and everyone says I have it lucky. In my mind, good god no was is even close to easy or being lucky.. I would much rather experience the day and a half labour like I had with my first tan ever experience a labour so quick again.. it was less than an hour and so traumatic for me…..
Women prison is Disneyland compared to Men's prison especially California. And I completely disagree about the guards being respectful towards men have you heard of gladiator school?
As much money as prisons generate in this country inmates should undoubtedly be receiving more hygiene products
Me and my sons mother tried to figure this out since we both have spent some time upstate but we weren't able to really get a real idea about it because she was always in a lower custody unit than I was because I have some violent charges and have did all my time in a level 3 or 4 unit and ive never experienced a dorm or open environment while serving my time and she never experienced a 23hr lockdown so we couldn't get to a good answer from our own experience anyway
The fact that women can emotionally support each other more openly. So whatever happens in there they have very little ways to emotionally develop. Leading to them staying there and such.
i'd even argue that women should be able to get more than 7 pairs of underwear per week, cause what about period accidents? also just on the daily, we all have our vagina cleaning itself in there so wearing the same pair of underwear a second time is just NASTY cause you can feel the dried hardened discharge in there rubbing on you, not to mention the SMELL
Wow, I had no idea vaginas cleaned themselves.
I've wondered about this for a while. Trying to figure it out. It's really like you said. It's just different.
Hey Jess, I really admire the work you've put into this channel and like your videos very much, so that's why I wanted to ask if you happen to know how accurate is the series vis a vis? Every time I watch something about prisom I wonder how much it resembles reality. Idk if you see this comment, but I've had that in mind for a while. Thank you again.
I got into some trouble when I was younger, when I was released they mailed my property back to me I got everything back exept my engagment ring. I went to the police station and an officer looked up the property and he said my engagment ring was in the truck and transported with with me. So I assumed it was one of the guirds that helped themselves to it. When I called them I can't remember what it was called they transfered my call to where they kept all the prisoners belongings and of course they couldn't find any records of my belongings.
Ayeee 🥰 Perfect timing!
What if a man happened to be put in a women's prison for some reason? How would that work out?
I only did a relatively brief(4 year) term in Texas as a young adult and in my experience, if you had the heart to get out there and fight for yourself and a little bit of skill, that was going to be respected and you would be alright as long as you didnt gamble or argue over the goddamn TV. Granted I was in pretty decent shape when I got locked up because I had been in the service, but that was my experience. From what I've heard from women, its not really like that, especially if you are a small woman who isnt that physically imposing
Seeing you get sad talking about lack of visits made me feel really bad for you and glad you are doing better.
I personally think that we should have different prisons or sections or some kind of programs within the prisons that vary based on the crime you commit. Prisoners should be working on whatever issues brought them there just like if were a rehab or mental Heath facility.
I always love your videos ❤
I love that u quoted Johnny depp ! I love him !❤
Can you believe Teresa Guidice got to do her time before her husband went in so her kids all above 3 wouldn’t have to be parentless & you couldn’t even give birth in a normal way.. like can you imagine the world of difference from judge to judge
You don’t go to prison for simple possession in Canada.
On the topic of men saying females have it harder and vice versa, I would have to point out that they have never experienced the other genders prison life, meaning that it would sound worse to them since they've never been through it themselves, not saying that it's a massive difference, but the stories heard by others are typically exaggerated because of the adrenaline from witnessing or being a part of a conflict
The women prisons sound like Wentworth Prison. They had family structure. Also, please watch Wentworth and do truth and false with the tv show!!! You did it with orange is the new black. ❤️
When I've been on several Psych wards I was interested to find out that staff kept leaving the womens wards to go work with the men because they are easier to work with apparently! I was told that this is because women are a nightmare due to often being bitchy and sly which can lead to longer term disagreements that leave a horrible atmosphere whereas men will have a disagreement which can quickly result in arguements/fights then things are usually resolved and back to normal again! Loving your content, hi from the UK xx
Men are simple.
@@LMD40 sounds pretty similar to psych ward, especially with my experience of the secure psych ward, as you've got to have eyes on the back of your head in order to survive.
@@LMD40 yep I bet!
I think it is based on the individual. Some people have easier times than others and some people make it hard on themselves in prison. I have only done county jail time. But I know females who went to prison and I have know males who went. Personally, my step son, adopt son and two of my son's went to prison.
Easier is requires an apples to apples. I don't have a monthly, I don't have a brain built around verbalization, largely due to socialization, I don't have guards figuring I am weak to begin with due to socialization. As a result, that looks way harder to me as a man.
Everyone has it hard in prison, it’s just different... Well said.
It's hard as an outsider looking in and wanting to help. I've looked into how I could get more sanitary products for women into prisons, and no one, literally no one accepts donations. It comes down to complete prison reform, which sounds scary to alot of people. The best I could do was find an organization that offers aid to those recently released from prison- I sent a bunch of hygiene and women sanitary products there.
It's a shame the prison system is profiting off of the dehumanization of people. I just didnt want someone to have to pay money for an extra pad.
Who gets custody of babies born in jail?
EXAMPLE-
My husband was in a county jail for 29 months and during that time he ran a “store” and would run the poker tables as well. His mama would put money on his books every week during her visits to see him. She never missed one visit. He even had to ask his mama to put money on my books because I was starving in the county jail where I served 24 months. My parents refused to put any money on my books unless it was for hygiene products. And by hygiene products I mean the basics- shampoo, conditioner, soap, body wash and deodorant. No extra anything. If I got lucky I would have enough left to buy three noodles and maybe two chips. I went to jail weighing 195lb and came home two years later weighing 140lb and didn't really work out or anything serious in jail. I would walk laps the pod and run stairs a few times a week for 20 or 30 minutes but that is it. I starved in county jail
I agree with you. Women and men have it harder in prison in different ways. It’s the same outside of prison. Men and women have it hard in different ways. I’ve always believed that men have it harder in life. I have to wonder if there are more women that agree with me than I think.
I did time in another country than you but a lot of the same points apply. The only big difference I noticed in that here, women get all the femenine hygiene stuff for free (and also they are allowed to have vibrators) whereas the men have to get everything from commissary (and they don't let fleshlights in because "they don't want to search it", despite no official policy against it)
I really like this vs. type video!! You should make more :)
I really enjoyed this one! Thanks Jess for sharing your thoughts and staying neutral. ❤️
What a fascinating video! 👏 you do a great job love your channel ❤️
Gangs v. family units, you nailed it.
Having been a correctional Officer in both men's and women's prisons, I say men have it harder in prison. But women do have their struggles that men don't.
It's just such a dehumanizing experience idk why people have to say which prison population has it better or worse.