Re-Parenting - Part 73 - Causes of Depression
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- Опубликовано: 21 сен 2024
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Since depression can be more than just genetic - since it can be influenced greatly by Complex Trauma; it is important to understand the aspects of Complex Trauma that feed depression. That way, we can begin to learn tools to heal and manage those things, which will ultimately help our depression. Tim gives 20 things from Complex Trauma that can feed depression.
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I'm depressed because I realized coming out of complex trauma that I have never felt loved, valued, like I matter for who I am. Like you mention isolate because ppl remind me of that fact. Problem is there are no ppl to connect with, I feel like ppl don't like me.
Your gut instinct is right on _ they don't like u because your a true child of God and will not compromise the truth. You can walk out of this with Jesus _ and hopefully we come out and have better discernment.God is teaching us about the broken_ sin_ _ it's not surprising narcs have overtaken the churches is because _ yes we are gentle as doves but we need to be wise as Serpents. I find this pastor does a very good argument for this as I can see the connections between GOD, the Bible and how to navigate the sodum and Gomorrah world we live in.
My God you just described my life
@@freshdumpling Sorry to hear it 💔 We deserve better!!
I feel the same way. My patterns perpetuate the problem. I just struggle to break the cycle. I tried getting a dog and I was lied to by dog owner and the dog came from a hoarding situation which caused behavior issues in the dog which triggered my trauma response. I tried making friends and either they take advantage or avoid me because I’m not healthy enough yet. It’s just hard all the way around.
Me too, how I ask? And where are these safe people?
I'm in shock that a pastor can explain such detail of complex trauma, better than any psychologist. You are a true gift to us ❣️
I’m not very surprised. Good pastors will spend more time taking care people psychologically and otherwise than any psychologist will during work hours minus the time they spend with bureaucracy and filing reports.
Some of the modern mental health services are in fact a secular replacement for what once was done by the church/clergy.
That said, I must acknowledge Tim really has a gift for understanding and explaining trauma, and everything related to it. You can see in his videos how he has put a lot of effort to learn all about it.
There are lots of folks on RUclips who understand how trauma happens, but Tim actually explains how it causes peoples’ lives to change over time in a way that no one else can.
This man truly has a gift.
A gift from God!!!!
Maybe because he is also a researcher.
I’ve learned that cleansing my mind and renewing it with truth of who I am in Christ has helped me to overcome depression. I also rebuked the spirit of depression in Jesus name.
Also I went on a grain free diet. If I have rice, I start sobbing for days. If I have wheat, it’s worse and the darkness last a month. So I think there is a combination of spiritual, diet and practical meditation on the word of God
This mans intelligence is fanominal. He must of studied for years,or had total experience of everything he sets out to tell us,god bless this man in deed. 🙏🏻
I really believe it's the Holy Spirit speaking through Him. The details in which he articulates everything one would feel and think and experience in these dark realms of addiction turama and depression is shocking accurate and lucid almost as if he is watching it as he is describing. It amazes me and I also feel so seen and understood and It is so easy for me to hear and understand him. He has been a life changing gift from God to me! 🙏
@@mzsonsie💖💖💖 I feel it too. It is the Holy Spirit working through him.....I know it. To walk with LOVE. To be like Jesus💖
All so true. But dang, just sick of myself.
I havent felt joy for 25 years.
Up to this point I thought of depression as something you fall into regularly because trauma has broken you and there's little you can do about it except wait for it to go away until it reappears next time.
Hearing this gentleman explain that depression is fed by different things like guilt and shame, false beliefs about yourself and the world, as well as too much sympathetic nervous system stress responses and not enough calming parasympathetic, makes depression seem a lot more manageable to me.
I am not inherently a terrible/unworthy person who is never good enough, that's just a lie I came to believe about myself because I inherited it from complex trauma, and that's also what is fueling my depression.
There are things you can do to activate the parasympathetic nervous system (yawning, sighing, and yes, engaging your core as if u were pooping).
Vagus nerve stimulation is key to sending calming signals to the brain.
I'd recommend the channel Therapy in a Nutshell which explains this very well and teaches simple exercises.
May everyone feel better soon, hang in there 💖
You've described my situation exactly. This is so life-giving and empowering - I feel like I finally have hope to beat depression. I can't thank you enough.
🙏🏼 Thank you Pastor Tim for your time and dedication to helping us
God bless you and Prayers for Us all 🙏🏼❤️
I’m amazed at your ability to articulate this so clearly. So nice to be understood.
I can't thank you enough, i am learning so much about myself through your teachings. Please don't stop. Since i understand my issues more deeply now, i have a greater understanding of things i need to talk with my christian counselor about. I love your Christian message at the end of your videos. Thank you, I'm so grateful for you. I'm really learning about the bible.
Your Friday night Venue has changed! A quiet Friday night.
This goes hard. Great video
I can't express with words how much you have helped me with understanding complex trauma and depression. Thankful!!😊
Thanks Tim! Love these videos. Suffered from severe, recurrent depression forever. My *only* bit of feedback for this video is when you said that some people don’t change their circumstances because they are LAZY. Uggggghhhhh!!! What a trigger word for me. My mother called me lazy every day 😢
Pastor Tim, you are amongst God's gifts to the world.
I thank God for this amazing work of healing and restoration He is doing in me and thank you for serving as His finger 🙏 many blessings to you and all that is yours! 🙌
This is so true. I’m about 3.5 years sober and understanding and uncovering emotions if super difficult. The AA steps are my core and working with other men. However there has to be more than the steps. The steps don’t have any understanding of trauma. The answer isn’t always that I’m being selfish, it’s not that simple (sometimes it is but many times it’s not). It took me months to realize I have been depressed just Tim said
Trauma breeds self hate + escape. Very few shake the monster.
I can relate. Just when I think I'm doing better, I watch another Tim F video. Solid information and it's soo needed, but....ouch!
I stumbled upon Tim's channel trough a comment from another video.
I am in the worst state I've ever been and I couldn't tell why. Thought it was just the burnout phase.
But thats only the symptom. I never dealt with my childhood trauma until recently.
Things are falling apart and getting back together slowly. Thank you so much for your work, Tim.
God bless you and your family.
Look for some talks by Deb Dana, I've just ordered her book, there's a talk she did with Deepak Chopra which is excellent 👍
Sounds like ' slow cook , Good cook ' xx
Man, I don't know. I've been working on myself for years, but listening to Tim I realize I have some coping skills and the rest is avoiding. Yikes! So much work! I just wonder if it's truly possible to completely recover.
Finally someone that makes sense 😂.
Tim gives good insight.
Wow. This was spot on. Except for the manipulating others part… though ppl pleasing, and other coping mechanisms he mentioned can be inadvertently manipulative.
Phenomenal, I'm not a child far from, but the pain of losing my ragdollcat has been heartwrenching; I can't stop crying, I had to give this beautiful cat away, I feel so bad about how confusing it must have been for him to just be given away to a stranger in the night, I have never seen him again, I miss him so much and worry about him, he may as well be a grandson!!!😂😂😂❤❤❤😢😢
Thank you ... Thank you ... Thank you
Very good explanation for describing the episodes of anxiety and then depression not related to other mental health disorders.
Thanks for the checklist. I thought I might be depressed but now I'm thinking it's grief and anxiety. Keep up the good work, you are probably saving lives!!
He does such an amazing job articulating these issues!
Tim Fletcher, will you ever comment to any of us on how to connect and where to find quality people?
Every therapist on the planet preaches connection, WHERE CAN WE FIND SAFE PEOPLE TO CONNECT WITH WHEN WERE ABSOLUTELY ALONE AFTER ABUSE OR ALONE WITH KIDS BUT NO FRIENDS AND FAMILY???
i listen but now i need DIRECTION.
My therapist has no direction for me either- I'm 50 in October and just about to not exist anymore because i have no one after being abused for almost my entire life.
Please answer. Please give us some gas for the vehicle.
So true. It’s harder to spot wolves in sheep’s clothing when we’ve been around wolves our whole lives. LIFT Online learning (look it up on timfletcher.ca) or coaching may be a great place to start. Safe people may feel like unsafe people at first as it’s unfamiliar. Our online environments may be what you need to give you a good baseline for what is safe/ healthy. 🤍
Love the prayer 🙏 at the end. Thank you so much for your amazing knowledge and wisdom and being able to share it with us ❤. God bless you ❤
Thank you 🙏🏽
Wonderful and helpful advice. Thank you!
Thank you for your videos ❤️🙏
I'm hearing my circumstances and situation with the understanding I haven't found in anyone byonmy own life , thanks
To get out from depression I had just two.
One, I went abroad To be away from family
Second I confront my superego who kept talking to me to kill myself with anger, Cause I couldn’t stand the dirty game anymore.
Its absolutely true thst i dont look after myself enough and i burned out from overwork over decades. My parter whom i was seperated from held money over me for years to control me. He gave me very little to live on and would withhold it if i didnt 'behave'. I worked alll gods hours to keep our heads above water financially. Now I'm permanently exhausted from worry and stress. He was an extremely wealthy man with yachts snd islands and ski lodges etc. Sorry for the rant. I just got triggered by the talk on overwork. I'm normally cheery and try to look forward 😊
A lot of Christians don't LET U FEEL fear anxiety etc . Very toxic . Ty
There is immense damage done by complex trauma and I feel so sad that I was such a beautiful and happy soul ruined by this. Had I have a normal childhood I had been a totally different person.
The way I reacted towards people when I am angry is like adding fuel into a fire, I just totally destroyed it.
I have done so much damage to my soul that it’s impossible now to look back and fix things.
There used be so much positivity and love inside me and it’s lost n gone. Turned out to be a bully and a bad soul with a bunch is bad karmic records.
Is it really impossible or just really hard to do
And we all know where the toxic shame came from. Thankyou so much Church Fathers for brain washing us to be your subjugated servants
Thank you Tim awesome ❤
I'm learning from you professor
Thank you so much só mulheres. Deeply
I had no idea that depression was a good thing. It makes sense.
@femininejewel
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You always say: ' talk to somebody' but what if in your life all your family is dead and you have no access to intimacy because every one you meet is a stranger. Its true I live in the Philippines and have no one of my own race around. I 'escaped' Western Europe because of the high level of narcissism there. In 40 years no single sane friend or warmth. Dont have cash for online therapy and do not have access to the USA where there is more consciousness and help. I am totally isolated and no chance of finding anyone to attach too, or even talk too in a day. Its unbearable brain famine and then WITH complex trauma to digest. Completely isolated in a strange low-concious culture, with people looking at you like an ATM, being scammeded multiple times by 'friends' because I was looking for closeness. Being the ATM -stranger in a low-minded very dissociated strange culture with no escape. Like an isolation death sentence NOW WHAT???
As a Christian, it sounds to me like you’re saying you can prove one part of the Bible is wrong by another part of the Bible that’s right or by science. I don’t think that’s what you meant to say. Maybe you’re saying it is the interpretation of it. But it’s not very clear.
camera is very blurry
Audio muffled at times and video is blurry. Just like your new video put out. What's going on
Just focus on what he's saying. It's really not that hard.
23:58 my way makes more sense. 😮😅😢 dang. I do that
Your missing interpretating the difference between descriptive scripture vs prescriptive .
This believing lies _ section are what narcissistic familues,churches,businesses recentlessly tell us who we are in their dysfunctional environents_ the only answer is codependency if u need a peanut butter sandwich.Been grieving since conception.
Exactly, I feel that majority of co-workers are fawning & codependent & enablers. I see it everywhere I go and I’m repulsed.
But yes, I need a peanut butter sandwich as well but get smeared out because I cannot fawn.
❤❤❤❤😊😊😊😊😮
What's the point of a religion where your holy text can be made to mean anything depending on what you think it should mean according to science and your current culture? How do you have confidence beyond understanding that you were brainwashed to believe it? I really don't get how y'all rationalise keeping religion a thing.
Baby guilt REALLY. They cant do the responsiblilty_ everytime they try to have autonomy_ narcy gets panicy and puts the lid on the garbage can they put u in
Boy oh doggy that is my grown child the gaslighter. Feeds my shame .
How does one connect with safe people?
Where are they?
You set boundaries, if people don't like your boundaries then you have your answer, trust your gut. 🙏🏻
More is needed he says in the first minute then after thirty minutes he is still defining depression. Too much info , not to the CB point