10 STEPS OUT OF TOXIC ASSOCIATIONS
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- Опубликовано: 24 май 2023
- #RCBLAKES #QUEENOLOGY #cyberchurch
10 STEPS OUT OF TOXIC ASSOCIATIONS
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Notes-
1. Recognize the signs of toxic behavior
2. Assess the level of toxicity
3. Set boundaries
4. Reduce contact
5. Be direct
6. Focus on positive relationships
7. Take care of yourself
8. Seek support
9. Practice forgiveness
10. Let go
Thank you for this
Thank you ❤️
Thank you, Angela, 🌺🌸🌺
Thank you ❤❤❤
What a life we have with these ppl.
Amen, thank you
Dear pastor,
I have removed myself from my toxic husband. I m still married, in the middle of divorce. Living on my own, i have trouble with the vow i grew up with, that you are married until death do you part. I feel guilty and it is hard to move on, though i know he will be my death if i stay.
I felt “don’t feel guilty for out growing people who had the chance to grow with you”
in my soul !
"If someone shows you who they are, believe them". Mia Angelo
"Believe them the first time".. ie. Don't let them have to show you again!
This was very timely. Im in a season of my life were I'm ready to let go of certain family members. Thinking about it breaks my heart but God is telling me it's time to love them from afar. Many years of stress and anxiety is starting to affect my health.
Thank you for the gentle reminder.
It's me, too. It breaks my ❤️ but it is NEEDED & the Lord has kept showing me the SAME THING!!
Prayers for you. We made that same step in 2021. You will not regret it! I’m free you will never be the same the Joy behind it is worth it!
@@ministerkimberly May God give us both the strength to do what we need to do..
@@carterthegamernoob6128 Thank you..
Thank you so much for saying this!! I was raised in a very religious and toxic family. I hated Christianity for years because I felt I had to put up with abusive people due to my Christian responsibility. It took me years of therapy and getting sick to figure it out. These abusers know how to play the Christian guilt and control card to a tee. It’s also hard to get away from these people in the Church because the members push you to just “love and forgive”. If you don’t, you’re not considered a “good Christian.” I honestly feel that Christianity in general breeds a very unhealthy relationship with the self. Took me years to build myself up again. I have a strong love and belief in God, but I try to stay away from “Church people.”
Amen 🙏🏼 sister this is facts. We truly walked away from our old church family it wasn’t good for us naturally or spiritually! They’re the worst to be honest. I’m free it feels stay free sissy 🙏🏼💕
I did this got rid of all toxic past men outta my life
Amen
Glad you got yourself well. The guilt tripping is the worst. Grew up with that myself, so I feel you. God bless. 🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️
So sorry that you had that experience. You are not alone. I have too as a pastors kid, and as a minister myself. It’s imperative for us all to heal from those toxic situations. I had to realize that that is NOT true Christianity. Those are the practices of people who may be believers, and may or may not know better ways of relating to people in a 😮 healthy way. Either way, it’s my responsibility to heal myself when I find the truth, and to share the truth with others so that they don’t become entangled or wounded themselves. I pray that you are well in your journey of healing.❤😇🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
👏👏👏 The is the most HONEST and DIRECT message on self-love that I have heard come from the lips of a Pastor EVER. This is REAL TALK.
Thank you, Pastor, for this highly relatable message on self-preservation. Your natural, uncloaked, delivery of practical and wise advice makes your messages broadly accessible and easily palatable.
Thank you, Sir, VERY much~ 🙏🏾 🙌
RC: I cannot begin to tell you how wise, kind and educational your words are. There are no words that can describe your gift. We all thank you .
Healthy people, are NOT offended by your boundaries as part of your self care and self love
We don't have the right to ask another person to change, to suit us. Reduce contact, interactions, and access to the toxic ones
My son had to chase a young lady away who wasn't just toxic, but lunacy. There are ppl who've treated me bad & I don't believe I'll ever trust them again. I don't want those ppl around me anymore. I thought about making up lies, but I'm gonna tell them why I don't want to be around them! I outgrew their toxicity yrs ago & I won't allow that foolishness around me anymore. They can continue telling all of their lie & see if I care. My mind & my heart is not anybody's trashcan!!!
Praise God i broke up with my ex this last Friday. In my last relationship i was trauma bonded, but God started revealing the truth and setting me free from the deception i was in. I literally felt trapped but kept seeking God. I was in a relationship with a narrassist and felt something demonic was going on. Praise God I am Free and my brain feels clear again! Thank you RC Blakes for speaking truth.
So many leaders will not talk about this it’s like they make it a sin to reduce contact between yourself and negative relationships
BISHOP!!!!!!! Please keep telling all the people of God the TRUTH, that lays inside that book 😁. As a Minister, I am always told to STOP acting funny towards family-ESPECIALLY MY OWN MOTHER & FATHER (btw who didn't raise me), BECAUSE I know better & it's NOT Christ-like?!
Exactly what you're saying, needs to be realized by A LOT of clergy men & women, so that they can inform the people of God the correct way to deal w/toxic people. Their "pray it away" attitude suggests that you just keep dealing with everyone's toxic behavior, rather than guarding your ❤️, mind & spirit while learning how to STAY AWAY & KEEP YOUR PEACE.
I've learned my mental can't / won't take all that negativity, thanks for the confirmation of reducing contact which works wonders 🕊️
Don't feel guilty for outgrowing the people that had the chance to grow with you. Thank you, thank you so much! I really needed to hear that🙏, because so many people have attempted to make me feel guilty about setting boundaries.
AMEN 🙏 SHE TRIED TO SABOTAGE ME, BUT GOD PROTECTED ME! THE WISDOM OF GOD!!!❤🙏
I HAVE TO PROTECT MY MENTAL HEALTH...REDUCING MY CONTACTS.❤
So so true. Way overstayed my Christian charity and it nearly destroyed me completely. Pastor, your teaching has helped me greatly. Thank you.
I wasn’t a good person but I WAS/HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HONEST. With whom I thought was the “love of my life” relationships are about honesty. I have always been honest with him. He’s broken me, I deserve it. But at least I have always been honest to him. I don’t even know what to believe anymore, the lies he’s told. The PROOF I have of all his lies. I’m breaking my own heart in guilt of me being so honest with him when all he does is lie to me. And I have proof.
Thank you RC Blakes for this incredible conversation. Can you please talk more about how to protect ourselves from selfish children?
Much love to you and Lisa ❤️❤️❤️
Amen. Many refuse to believe children can be toxic. I have a bird's eye view. It breaks my heart to see my fiance's children's toxic behavior towards him. I pray Bishop dies a podcast on this subject soon.
Yes please!!!!!!
This was good. It’s funny how a particular person kept coming to mind during this discussion. Heard you, Bishop!
I completely remove people and honestly, I don’t speak to them again. That’s my way of dealing with people. I let go in a way that’s honestly like a death. 😂 great video❤
Never are you condescending you are uplifting remind me of my Daddy keep preaching the truth ❤
All of Bishop's messages are on the money but this one was a real eye opener 🔥🔥🔥 Real truth spoken with scripture to back up what Bishop was teaching.
Many struggle with trying to manage toxic relationships, even to the detriment of their mental and physical health. They think they are not being "Christ like" to end relationships or associations.
I believe in protecting my heart. I am so glad Bishop was brave enough to out it out there, that we do not have to stay enslaved in relationships, just because we're "family."
Looking forward to a message solely about "TOXIC children." I thank God this is not my case, however, many close to me refuse to accept they are in toxic relationships with their children.
I'm praying for all who are straddling the fence, afraid to let go. Always thanking God for Bishop's thought provoking messages of truth. Many blessings to Bishop and the lovely Lady Lisa 🙏🏼
Thank you so much! So grateful for you!
What you said at the beginning about struggling with the idea of being with toxic people as a Christian and it not being Christ like. This has definitely been my struggle! So thank you so much for this video ❤
You are like a big brother!!! You have me laughing and crying!! I love these ‘conversations’! So edifying!😄☺️🙏🏾
I'm just 16 minutes in but this sermon is giving me so much life. It's so renewing to be reminded that boundaries aren't just allowed, but required!
I was raised in a toxic environment family member’s. I completely don’t go around them the one ☝🏼 cousin I trust she knows where we’re that’s it. I had to cut my grandparents off too. I speak to them when my mom talks with them that’s about it!
These are my parents. I just don’t waste my time anymore.
Thank you so much for this sermon🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
BOUNDARIES AND RESPECT 🙏❤
You’re right past her I never knew anything about boundaries and I was always so kind and giving you no never said no to anyone and that was my big mistake in life always try to make people happy, forgot to make my own so happy so I learned lotta lessons and teach a new teaching a Salada lessons. I love when you come on a listen when I said boy where are you? 10 years 20 years back
I blocked A lot of people on Facebook and IG . I learned to live in peace and harmony with myself and my household sometimes my grandchildren are irritating 😠 but they’re children who will adjust accordingly. I have zero tolerance for adults who are toxic
Thank you. This Wisdom was much needed. 👑
Awesome teaching Pastor Blakes
Thank you 😊 💓
This is " Real TALK "
Me either now Bishop I’m learning
I’m tired of the take over spirits
This message Blessed my soul🙏🏾❤
You’re right I learned that the hard way that person was silly, working hard bringing in the groceries picking up the back wax everything and then didn’t. It didn’t even phase him. They couldn’t care less. Thank God I got rid of him 510 years ago. This divorce to unblock him.
This message really resonates with me in this season! I know it was from God. ❤
YES YES YES!!! FAMILY
Pastor going through this right now with a friend from church..She sucks the life outta me so I created space..She as well as other's don't agree but idc..You can't serve from a empty vessel!!! TY
This was fantastic. I watched it twice. You’re so deep 🙏
Perfect message for me!! Thank you Pastor Blakes!!❤️🙏
Thank you so much for your wisdom. Gloria
This was good.. he’s right , remove yourself.
I now have autoimmune disorder ( vitiligo) from the stress years ago
Confirmation Bishop I couldn’t stand the fact we lived down the street from my mother sister. She was a problem knocking on our door 🚪 unannounced repeatedly! She always act like we owe her something. God fixed it. He moved us across the country. We’re at peace ✌️
I could just cry. 😢
Got a fence all the way round and keep it locked and get fuss at about that like I’m there child
But at peace
Self care is having structure
This is the best I EVER heard by Bishop, tho' they're all great.
Yes I felt that way
Too thanks for the word❤ person , place or anything I’m learning I said it but kept putting myself when and where I felt in my heart I wasn’t and not wanted
Yes
Thank you for your teaching!!
This has enlightened me!! That I made the correct choice for my life.😊
Thank you Bishop
🔥🔥🔥
This is awesome!!! Thank you!!!
Whew! Teach Pastor 👏🏾
Again thank you so much
❤
PREEEEAAACCCHHH PASTOR!!!!
Thank you! Powerful message 🙏🏽💕🙏🏽
A word for today
Thank you Mr Blakes ❤
Powerful! Thank you I receive it 🙌
All right pastor, I was drinking to the point that I had to let it go. I couldn’t do no more.
💯💯💯💯💯
When I think it can’t get any better!!! Thank God!! For you!!!😊
Thank you
This was amazing and so impactful. Amen
My god!!
I needed this message today Pastor! Thank you so much❤
Thank you again in sharing this especially with my 30 year old son
🔥🔥🔥🔥Bishop
EXACTLY 💯 WHAT DO WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT?😮
lord for pastor Blake I got it!!!!!Amen!
Amen, you are teaching, sir ....thank you this is so good...I have been sharing your teaching with many women in my life
Tell it Bishop I’m taking care of me finally it Dee good 👍
Thanks pastor Blackes. This is very powerful
Helloi my favorite ❤
Nothing better than voice. It speaks like non other and nothing is new today. You hear it immediately and convince self it’s you not the continuous sound from life. I’m definitely guilty of giving too much rope to people that need to strangle . And I do artwork using string so much it’s a media enemies use as discounted and sale items. One group of string cost 900 later at the local car dealer when getting remotely damages repaired. It’s a gas lit strategic forum that More and more reveals manifested itself in 1970 when my father was left drowned in Georgia where my gas tank spring fell off.
In a new marriage it’s difficult to. Just walk out…
This message was right on time!!! It just confirmed so much for me! Thank you Bishop🙏🏽 ❤
Pastor this was so very helpful. I am grateful I found your ministry
it has helped my mental health. Thank you.
Thank you from my heart! I needed this message.
*I broke my own heart into a million shreds...
By so DEEPLY desperately totally loving: a fantasy,
instead of the real man (with a trillion red flags).*
please, please, please, God, help me.
I cannot bear the darkness any longer.
please. please, angel of mercy, help!
please, I'm dying inside.
I'm terrified and alone.
UNBEARABLE PAIN.
DROWNING IN TERROR AND GRIEF.
I WANT TO DIE.
HOW WILL I EVER HEAL?
I AM DYING OF PAIN.
I AM DESPERATELY TERRIFIED
AND ALONE AND PANICKED.
my soul is raped.
I'm in so much pain.
I'm in hell with no escape.
I'm a tortured prisoner to the darkness.
darkness envelopes me and surrounds me...
I live in frantic panicked terror.
I am paralyzed with trauma.
I have hyperventilating panic attacks. ALL. THE. TIME!
I die of the pain.
I am tormented.
TORTURED.
ALONE.
alone and dying.
desperate and in despair.
I want to die.
I can't bear the pain and the grief and the panic.
I can't bear it.
I suffocate with panic attacks.
I am paralyzed with trauma.
I DIE die die OF PANIC!!
the suffering and grief are unbearable.
I am tortured and haunted and suicidal.
I am tormented and terrified and all alone.
so so so very alone!!!
I want to die.
I can't bear this pain.
CANNOT BEAR IT.
CANNOT BREATHE.
DO NOT BREATHE.
nightmares all night.
panic attacks all day.
he replaced me.
disposed of me.
I WAS GARBAGE TO HIM.
I've been viciously maliciously brutally violently raped,
at the level of my soul,
by my best friend,
who abandoned, and betrayed me,
and disposed of me like garbage...
the suffering is unbearable.
the trauma and the panic truly suffocate me.
I am horrified and haunted.
I am terrified and alone.
but there are some things I've learned
to appreciate about myself (through all this), like:
- my kind eyes
- my gentle ways
- my depth
- my poetry
- my insights
- my writing
- my magic
- my sweet smile
- my intelligence
- my wisdom
- my incredible ability to truly listen and to really hear
- my softness
- the bitch in me
- the poet in me
- when I love, I give EVERYTHING
- my innocence
- my sweet gentleness
- my willingness
- my openness
- my discernment
- my unfolding
- my empathy
- my talents
- my heart
- my beautiful magical self-healing wise miraculous gorgeous body...
please, God, help me remember these following things:
- not to try to attract people,
but rather, to trust the universe...
to trust life...
that the right people
will enter my life
in the right moment...
- to set boundaries...
Philippians 4:6 -
"Do not be anxious about anything,
but in every situation, by prayer and petition,
with thanksgiving, present your requests to God..."
Also, In the name of Jesus,
I bind any and all evil spirits:
of PTSD/terror/aloneness/loneliness/pain/panic/shame/grief/distress...
And command you and demand you, in all authority given to me, by God...
To leave me now! Go to the abyss and never return!
In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, Yeshua, my salvation!
I DECLARE YOU Leave me: NOW!!!
I 100% completely totally entirely renounce PTSD
and I come into agreement, with any spirits associated with my pain,
to leave me right now and forevermore!
This is a spiritual war.
I have been an injured warrior.
NOW I RECLAIM MY POWER!
HALLELUJAH!!
ALSO:
I KNOW GOD IS THE BEST MATCHMAKER
AND HIS DIVINE TIMING IS ALWAYS PERFECT!
I PRAY! I TRUST! I RECIEVE! TO GOD BE THE GLORY! 💙
😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣dance right on to the car Bishop
Exactly, pastor. There must be a strong willing heart to come out of toxic relationship from the depths of the devil's kingdom. Those people that are deeply into the toxic relationship which doesn't glorify God and His plans for his church have never been born again Christian in the first place. They are not ready yet to be together with the Lord Jesus by seating in the heavenly places. May God deliver them. They think that they are doing it secretly but they don't know that their so-called sin partners take them out to different people to tell them about their sexual immorality and sexual behaviors. That's why is good for one to be in true love before having sex because the sin partners don't have a good intentions concerning them and they tell people about their foolishness, lusts and sinful activities with them. The wife or husband in true love, cannot gossip their spouses with the outsiders no matter how a friend can be closed to you. I hope that these people that pretend to be Christians but involved themselves in all these sinful lifestyle and devilish activities can understand your point of view.
Now that we’re across the country we stop talking to our family members. I have a selection of cousins I choose to deal with. I reduced contact and now it’s just one ☝🏼 I know loves me for me. I just text her this morning 😊
Pastor Blake’s How do you handle it when it’s your own child ?
Thought pastor was going to say the disgruntled name caller was hating herself not seeing the beard which probably is true too means same projected
I’ve never even met you in person, I’ve only seen you in these videos and you are NOT a misogynist. Maybe they used the wrong word or didn’t understand the word lol
What if it you family my sister keeps competing with me even tries to destroy the bond with my other sister 😅
What scares me deathly is it appears like the bad marriage and his religious brother that’s a preacher who refused to marry us. The man asked me to ask him. All at same time he’s saying to me kind david while I was saying prince charles I cherish more, and I’m with neither both I left but for different reasons. And technology is worse knowing these people are all alive. So much easier since you can’t hear how loud the profanity is in person. Lol that’s the beauty of the screen. I haven’t watch television in a year and had a 50 grand education bill surrounding television production. I hear myself saying to an old classmate from high school and college who said her mother refused them television growing up. I thought it sounded crazy and was fallout from being a dsughter of preacher . Maybe . Maybe not
And reduce contact, is easy for me lol
Wearing Gucci? Talk about a toxic brand! 😂
Bishop I had to block this guy today concerning this very thing.
I’ve heard Joyce meters testify of her sexual relationship with her father in the house. She doesn’t look like what she described but many do unless it’s a car accident and they’re in a wheelchair.
NO EXPLANATION NEEDED!
This is in my top 5 videos of yours….thank you so much 🩶
Thank you sooo much for this video. I just separated myself from my cousin, who just lost her husband. I had been helping her four months. Things were good in the beginning. Then, things changed a week ago because she wanted to suck the life out of me to make her happy and keep her uplifted. She didn’t care that I was mentally, physically, and emotionally drained. She didn’t care. If I wasn’t catering to her, she would say that I could go home because I wasn’t fully focused on her. She let me know that she didn’t care about my mental health. She knows my current mental health (I am therapy). She told me, “if my therapy doesn’t allow my to perky and happy for her then I could go home). I left 5:30am the next morning. I haven’t heard from her since last weekend. I have no intention of calling or going to her house anytime soon.😒😒😒😒❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
I don’t think what “they” said was true, they are in denial and haven’t yet realized what they’ve been through. I think your messages are great and have opened my eyes and helped me