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The Truth of the Tortured Artist
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- Опубликовано: 14 авг 2024
- We addressed the myth, and now it's time for the truth of the tortured artist. Some art is born of pain and suffering, and reflects the darkest side of human experience. We like that about it. If you need help with mental and/or substance use disorders, contact SAMHSA’s National Helpline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) or go to www.samhsa.gov/.
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Thanks to our Grandmaster of the Arts Vincent Apa, and all of our patrons, especially Patrick Hanna, Nichole Hicks, David Moore, Jan Quale, and Constance Urist.
Corrections:
2:22 is not Roberto Matta but Nicolas Carone in his Rome studio, 1950
3:41 this list originated with Sister Corita Kent!: www.brainpicki...
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Depression can sabotage the creative process. I went through counseling which included art therapy, making works that symbolized my emotions. It wasn't something I had ever tried before. Now I have better control of my depression, and a new way to look at my art. Tortured? Yes, for a while, but not anymore.
I don't know how to get through . Because of depression I am not able to study . Or understand the broad ideas of any of my subjects math,Physics etc. I can't go to the therapist since I don't have money . And I am met with "you are just being lazy and unambitious" by my parents. I also thought this is what I am for a long time and that I have to be this ...it is necesary and teenage ....but it is not like that ....you can be normal and not depressed i guess. I occasionally scribble on pages of my journal to went out frustration . There comes out to be faces in that scribbles. I scribble to see which New face I will get to see. That is my therapy . Haaaa
Which shows you escaped depression through art. Some don't escape it, but instead have brief moments of respite from depression, mostly while painting - that's what a tortured artist is.
@@studyaccount2160 Life utterly sucks fora lot of people for more time than they let us see. I'd love to see your "scribbles" if you're willing to share them. I love finding faces.
@@janisfroehlig7744 Hey hi . My mental health is much better than the time I wrote this. Thanks for responding I wrote this comment and forgot and now Your reply brought my attention to this . I now can see how miserable I was I wish I would have gone to a therapist . The book is very dangerous thing actually I don't want to open it again . I won't be able to share it. Maybe one day when I'll open my journals and find my scribbles. Ill share
@@studyaccount2160So glad to hear you're feeling better than you were! Sorry to dredge up a dark time in your past. Maybe someday I will perceive some art and spiritually know we reconnected on this, that you were able to shed light to help other people through similar dark places. Perhaps you or I will take a different path. Either is OK. Thank you for staying open despite the darkness - that's very difficult!
I only feel tortured when my skills can't cope with my imagination.
Wow this is exactly it
underrated comment
OMG, yes...you just nailed it on the head! Its like therapy for me just to have it put into words! Thank you!
solution?
This channel taught me more than my public school art classes did
and my private shcool art classes
I was an art minor in college. I definitely have learned more from this channel than from my professors, and Sarah is far less pretentious and far more empathetic than many of my art teachers.
With enough practice anyone can emerge a tortured artist ;) -- 'i love all music on the inside' I am assuming you have learned more about *theory* from this channel than you school classes.
@Timothy Lee Nope. That's because school is like a movie with a simple plot that could be explained in about 5 senteces and 90% fillers.
And my art college professors.
I actually cried a little bit at the end of this video. What a beautiful statement you made here. Well done, Sarah.
Yes, that got me, too!
I muddle through difficult times on my own quite a bit, so kind words like that really stir up some feelings.
So did I!
Same.
Well said❤️
I teared up a bit too
I had never thought too deeply about this idea that if an artist is not suffering, they can't add that much value (especially monetary value) to their work. Of course that isn't true, but it is ingrained in us a little bit, isn't it?
Anyway I love melancholic art because yes, it can convey so many emotions
Arent we all drawn more to people with a tough life and suffering? I guess it makes for a better story and so we also start looking at the person as a work of art themselves
Is melancholic art produced by a happy person melancholic? :) And what if a melancholic person accidentally produces "happy art"? (or can everything they produce only be melancholic?) I wonder: if someone told me about a work of art that it was made by a depressed person, would I feel more?
@@watchvids7802 I was thinking more of the tone of the art itself, not the backstory, but it can have an impact too, I guess. And of course, it also depends on the state of mind I'm in, because it affects my experience if art
Basically what I got from these videos is that you, the artist, should be genuine to yourself and that will be projected into your art. Don’t romanticize the tragic lives of others thinking that it will make you a better artist. Being genuine pays off.
I really think this romantic myth of the tortured artist or the romantisising of mental illness in general can be very harmful - I did really appreciate this, in my humble opinion, very important and nuanced video!!!!!! :)
I think this argument is used by normies (bread & butter, nice house, with a dog and yard etc) to make themselves feel like they're on the same creative level as the so called "tortured artist".
@kshiftkometh my friend that's a theory..people keep forgetting that Vincent admitted himself to a psych hospital because he's aware of his mental state -- this is already an indication that strengthens the probability he did really shoot himself, somehow merely mkssed but still managed to kill himself after 2 days.
@@grubbybum3614 Absolutely!
@@grubbybum3614 normies? Cringe
@@grubbybum3614 facts
I know it is therapeutic for me to make art when I feel tortured.
Same 💖
Xenolilly it is remarkable as a form of therapy and if one continues at it, it just keeps getting better
Xenolilly exactly! I can’t even create when I’m happy .. my best work is when I feel tortured
I can definitely relate to what you said about the dangers and set backs of being a so called “tortured artist”. Art has always been an outlet for my mental health struggles and I wouldn’t be alive today without being able to make the art that I did. But now since starting the process of trying to get accepted into an art school, I’ve more than once failed to realize that making art sometimes does my mental health more bad then good. Like just recently, I stayed up way too late working on a piece to put in my application and I was working towards a deadline. I wasn’t sleeping, I wasn’t eating, and I could not stop worrying about the piece. So I think art can be both an outlet for mental anguish and expression, but it can also cause some to become so detached from themselves that they forget to take care of their needs.
I just got out of my therapy appointment talking about art and how it helps me express how I feel but how I don’t want to be a “ tortured artist”. And then I see this notification. Damn it’s like the universe wire tapped my phone
I make videos just for you, Libby K ;)
The Art Assignment feels nice to be appreciated lmao 😂
It's called a synchronicity - I suggest you look that up - carl jung had a lot to say about it - look into how you can expand your awareness through being more conscious of them and also I would say don't be too quick to think you know the meaning behind what is syncing - record them regularly and see what unfolds - also record your dreams I would say
No but google is always listening
This is brilliant. I really rate both this episode and the previous one on being mentally ill. It's such a relief as the Tortured Artist Routine has been front and centre for many, many decades--in reference to women artists; and, actually artists in general. I love the heads-up that you give to everyone to look after (as much as is possible) their health so that they can make art. I've been learning the hard way about all this. It's been two and a half years since I've been able to do anything at all. It's like spring coming to be able to be creative again. Things have been dry for a long time. When you are a mess; haven't got the energy; are dis-abled in some way then it's really difficult to do much else than get from one minute to the next. Yes, experiences can be used but does not contribute to the creative process.Thanks. You have been very liberating.
THIS THIS THIS, I need to keep this in my browser bookmark as a reminder. I still deal with the guilt of "well I completed this, in a day, hour or minutes... SO, it's not art, it's a scribble." I need to get idea out of my head that if I don't spent a month or year on a project, it can't be art.
Personally, I love scribbles.
I relate to this so much. A vast majority of my artwork is created within one or two hours painting time, with some even taking just 15mins. This is just my painting process, I love the challenge and freshness of producing art swiftly. If I take too long I lose the momentum and I feel stagnant and my painting becomes overworked. It doesn't stop me from feeling like it's not "real art" though. The funny thing is, if another artist I liked told me their work took, say, an hour to finish then I wouldn't bat an eyelid. This criticism only seems to apply to me.
This actually made me think about John’s book Turtles All The Way Down. I’m so grateful he wrote a book giving insight into the experience of OCD, but all the more so because I know from other media how serious he is about staying as healthy as possible.
As a tortured artist myself, your exhortation to keep fighting & creating and also to share our work really encouraged me. Thank you!!
Kirsten Hellwig i hope the art you create helps you be less tortured and provides some sort of release
I've never heard of Louise Bourgeois, but that quote makes me all the more interested in everything she's done.
Frog Toad I have the Persistent Sisters artist cards and she’s featured. Her sculptures are absolutely fascinating!!
She is absolutely great. I got inspired by her so much. In Milan at the fondazione Prada there are two wonderful works. A big puppet and an installation of a room. Maybe you can find it on the internet.
Definitely gonna be checking out everything I can about her, I'll try to find the puppet statue for sure!
I recently watched "Tracey Emin on Louise Bourgeois" here on RUclips (2 parts), it was very insightful. 👍
The shade they threw at Jeff Koons when talking about making art with little inconvenience. Couldnt help but laugh XD
if you look for it, you can find shade directed at Koons quite often; I always find it hilarious.
I love Niemann. Anyone interested should watch the Netflix series Abstract : The art of Design. The first one on Niemann is absolutely genius.
I thoroughly agree ,it is freaking great, ,that yellow Lego was the best abstraction for the a new york taxi
Still waiting on that second season
Ankit Aishwarya thanks for the reminder, been meaning to watch that series.
Shit happens .I had a uninsured trip to the hospital for emergency surgery . The painting I was working on at the time ended up taking 4 years to finish due to the stresses of dealing with that .After finishing it finally, I really felt let down within my art world and didn't make art for a few years . I'd think about it but couldn't pick up the brushes . It took just being a shop monkey in a print shop, screen printing others work , to push me back into it and I have been at it, painting, solid for 15 plus years since I restarted .
I am always delighted and transformed into a child on christmas morning when i see a new episode of The Art Assignment is available. I have been making shitty art for a long time (i've learned to not judge what I make or even try to understand it all, i just make it), none of which has really ever been seen by anyone but myself. but a few years ago, art grabbed my full attention and pulled me out of a really dark and abusive place.
It's sad that the United States and many other countries and cultures have a terrible time addressing mental health, it's really sad that videos like this need to do the opposite! of not only addressing the issue but convince people that being mentally well is better than being unwell!
So grateful for your time and commitment to making the most valuable videos available.
3:09 the bull's d is very necessary
Nnnnnnnnnn....yes.
Apparently haha
LOL! well yeah, otherwise it'd be a generic cattlebeast of unspecified gender
b
😂😂😂😂
I see Frida, I click
excuse me WHAT that's the rudest thing i've heard all day oh my goodness
Actually!!! Frida was a beautiful soul who suffered because of a freak accident. She could hardly walk due to this. She even had to be bedridden. Her talent, her art come directly from her heart.
@Frederik Pedersen And I guess both Aurora and Nena are ugly by your standards because they have (had) armpit hair?
What a refreshing perspective! Also, you enunciate and pontificate better than almost anyone I have ever heard. Well done.
This has to be one of my favourite RUclips channels. Thank you, Sara and Art Assignment-team, for always helping me discover new artists and making me think.
Thank you for this episode. As a musician and someone with Clinical Depression I have struggled and suffered, but my music celebrates my living--it does not celebrate my suffering. Thank you again.
I loved this ❤️
I used to pour out my negative emotions into art until I found that it no longer freed me but only exasperated my negative emotions because I was constantly focusing on the negative in order to get a piece finished.. now if I'm feeling severely depressed or any of my mental illnesses are bothering me a great deal, I take something that I can find refuge in and I tend to use very bright colours and paint with my fingers to give myself that more "personal" feel to my pieces.. I still have a great love for the dark parts of my mind and how they can come out in different ways through art, but I find a great joy in doing the opposite of what is in my mind more often than not~
I think art relies on inspiration, and sometimes mental illness can provide that inspiration (or deepen the artist's outlook, especially in writing/poetry). But mental illness is just as likely to impede on the artist's productivity. I feel like I've been at both ends of this--so depressed I can't stop creating, or so depressed I can't create. (Likewise, my ADHD inspires me by causing me to daydream about new ideas--but then impedes on my ability to finish them.) Ultimately, I think the "tortured artist" relies less on the torture itself and more on the response to it.
Only art was there with me when i went through depression. And i was the most creative. Then it slowly vanished as started to feel better. And I almost wished to feel that way again ...depressed...so that I could get that unique kind of creativity back. To my shock and surprise, i went into another depression phase due to an abusive relationship. But this second Depression was too dark and deep; the worst years ever, i was suicidal. Now after years, I have healed myself quite a lot. ButI still like to dig deep in my emotions to find that sense of pain that gives that unique drive to my creativity. And I deal with stress and anxiety by drawing smooth lines and patterns ...it helps me calm down and feel good. Like, alcohol or cigarettes or chocolates do for some people.
thumbnail lowkey looks like frida cosplayed as pink guy
Very interesting and thought provoking. Thank you ♥️
Always good to see an Art Assignment episode!
Superb. I understood in context what you were saying in the prior vid, but still appreciate you wheeling back around and expanding the conversation here. Beautiful video.
Always love watching videos in this channel. It makes me realize things I haven't thought of before.
Sarah Urist Green and John Green have taught me more about mental health than anybody else. I just really love their videos, because I always feel more educated and also more calm after watching them. Thank you guys so much!
Next time you're in Boston, I'd love to show you and your art friends the autobiographical masterpiece of John Singer Sargent at the Boston Public Library. Pain and suffering and wonder and joy and living on the walls, done over 29 years of his life.
I have never seen it! Would love to.
Fantastically well put. There's so much nuance to what it means to be tortured, and how the artistic process, or art itself, can bring the pain, or it can be an outlet for pain, or all of the above. I was really struck by the early bit around time/difficulty and the perceived value (cost, in this case) of a work. It is fascinating how much our industrial economic mindset invites us to think in terms of some idea of absolute currency equivalency rather than asking "what is this worth to me?", and even more so, how we equate hard, boring, long, suffering, time as being more worthy and currency valuable than something done in, or that brings, great pleasure. (Or understanding the skill required, which is really what we're paying a person for) I've seen this a bunch in online artist communities, where some decry the idea of the artist setting up a Patreon or having some works behind a 'paywall', usually with shouts of "get a real job, this isn't worth money!" Of course, all while clearly coveting (ie finding value in) the work since they freely want it. A reflection of how few workers nowadays enjoy their jobs, so the thought of someone else enjoying both seems like it can't be work and also wanting to bring them down to the same level of suffering? ... I might be digressing here. :P But all that in just the first bits of this video, and it's equally rich throughout! Another amazing video, thank you so much. :)
This video was really helpful for me today. Thank you
Me too, didn't know I needed it until I was weeping. Partly for sorrow at what I used to do to myself to "make good poetry" and partly in sorrow that I don't make poetry at all anymore...and also relief. Poetry now is my therapy for when I'm "sad-mad," and I'm not feeling that way so often. There's enough good there that I can accept not being able to write emotionally the way I did back in my early twenties.
I still make stuff. But it hit me that I don't need to harm myself - focusing too much on the art and forgetting to take care of me. It's astonishing how often I have to remind myself to do that.
I agree with both this video and the previous video on the myth of the tortured artist. There are many artists out there that don't suffer from mental illness and make amazing works of art and it isn't any less valid because they don't suffer for it. For me, I'm a writer and poet. I also suffer from depression. I haven't talked to a doctor about it yet, but I keep feeling like I may also be a sociopath and bipolar. For me, I don't think I would ever want to "cure" my depression were such an option available. My depression is a tool that I can draw upon to help connect with others and positively influence my art. In depressive slumps, I have written some of what I consider to be my best work. I can harness a whole range of emotion that I normally don't have access to. Part of what makes our art unique is that it captures who we are as people, both good and bad. The negative parts of me are still part of me. While I always seek to better myself, I still put my negative aspects within my art as to not deny my true self. Anyway, I went a bit off topic, but I feel like I needed to write it, even if no one reads it.
Hi Decaying Reverie, you might be interested to look into Kay Redfield Jamison's books 'an unquiet mind' and 'touched with fire'. She is a bipolar psychiatric clinician and writer. Your comment reminds me of some of the things she found and wrote about. Kind regards!
Thanks for the recommendation. I'll have to check it out.
I had no idea how much I needed this today, especially that bit at the end. The perspective here is always valuable. Thank you for this one in particular.
thank you for this! art has pulled me and so many others out of our darkest places, it gives us something material to hold or look at, it helps us understand ourselves/mental states just a little better.
These videos are always so poignant & delightful, in a strange way, to watch over & over again :)
I’m so glad I stumbled on the Art Assignment. This is so far, a really great channel... I absolutely love art, and I love critiquing it. I also dabble in it a bit, but I think I’m more of an art critic than an artist? Or maybe something in between? I do understand how hard it is to create art. It’s beyond difficult. But I don’t think people should criticize an artist by how much they struggle or not while creating art... all that matters is that they create something genuine. By the way, I’m not a huge fan of Picasso, but I love his painting of “the Blind Man’s Meal”
I just wanna thank you for existing, I'm an art Prof but when I watch your channel I become a student again.
I am going to save this valuable video in my favourite folder. Thank you for creating this. I have been suffering as an artist try to deal with my own life and creative thoughts every day.
“Taken a pause”?
I thought you had stopped outright.
That phrase implies that you will/might return to issuing new assignments. That thought makes me very happy. So please do! I didn’t do many of them but I enjoyed the concept and the opportunity they afforded to hear from and about different artists working today.
I love this channel. I love what you are doing. You look and sound great. It’s such a joy and privilege to be able to access and share this sort of content. Thank you!
that ending statement... wow.. just what I needed. thank you for this
the message at the end made me tear up, i really needed this video
Its always great to get a new Art Assignment video. Oh, and thanks for the Mozart Reqiuem, thats one of my favorite pieces
I am not even an artist, but this moved me so much. Thank you.
That final message was so necessary. Thank you.
What a wonderfully informative, inspiring, surprisingly uplifting, kind, and genuine video.
Thank you so much for making these videos. I wouldn't have dreamt about some of the things they've taught me, things that aren't in high school art classes, a lot of documentaries and books too.
Oh my god this is the best flipping video I've seen in a long time and it addresses such an important issue and it really really boosted my mood and made me feel valid and comfortable about my work. Thank you. I'm going to show this to all my peers. IT'S JUST SO IMPORTANT
I remember when the channel started still here after all these years and love it more than ever!
Sarah's concluding statement was soul-shakingly profound, almost making me cry.
"Art can be an outstanding way to communicate suffering, but only if Ur;
A) Alive & B) Well enough to see it thru...
For all the tortured artists out there, keep showing us what U've got. We want to know about the dark places U've been, we want to see what helps U get out of it & we want U to stay healthy enough to do that."
- Sarah Urist Green
www.patreon.com/artassignment
My depression and anxiety forces me to clam up and move in a very small part of my house. I become hypersomnolent. My art has stagnated always because of this. It's hard to be creative when you are imploding. But, I've only ever became serious with my art after I had the worst breakdown since. So I guess, yes... Yes to what you said. And thank you for wishing us well at the end. That felt so good.
I have bipolar type 1 as well as many other issues I struggle with however my art is BEST, when my mind is level and “normal” not when I’m in the throes of my illness. The illness brings creative depth but not clarity of actions.
I love your message here. And thank you for it.
This really made sense with me. I've always known that people search for that tortured factor and when you make happy or comforting art, you are not a "true" artist. I feel this as people look into works and they subconciously do that. I am an artist and I choose to do work that are happy arising from my daily life and what I feel, whether happy ,sad or fine. I find it easy to stay honest and do what you beieve in or forever be tortured by people's voices in your head. I love the way you explained this topic, I hope I have seen this sooner so I wouldn't feel so helpless when I was in art college. Thank you.
Thanks for all the excellent videos you guys make. This is no exception. Always makes me feel like I've learned a lot. Thanks for teaching us about art, and about so much more.
I needed to hear some things from this. Such a comforting voice.
I dunno if it's my headphones doing it, but the high-pitched S sounds come out REALLY sharp and unpleasant in the audio :(
A year late but I wanted to express my surprise seeing you here. I just started following your stuff on League/Souls series and thought they were really interesting.
It's just good fun when someone whose content you like also likes the content that you like.
I'm stunned - someone talking sense about art. Thank you!
I love this channel SO MUCH! I can't wait till you come back (please come back?)!
I refuse to take medication for my bipolar in fear it will dull my creative process --- on the other hand my anxiety and depression tramples all over my ability to get anything done...instead I torture myself, cry over the fact I cant get this idea out of my head fast enough or right when I feel it. The process has become an inner battle to fight my anxiety and create. I am seeking help for my mental illness, but the illness does not define my art, but I truly believe it helps me see and think in ways not everyone does. It does take me extra effort to finish or even start a project. Often I wonder my abilities and why I try so hard. At the end of the day, it's my passion...and I'd let it pull me under with it.
Bravo Sarah. You, and the channel, rock.
I rember watching your first video and waiting for the next assignment. How time flies.
Very good video and thank you so much for the little speech at the end, really helpful :)
I remember going through a depression where words were totally insufficient to communicate what I was feeling. Visual art allows us to communicate and connect without words. Probably why all artists are tortured by writing about their work.
thanks for making this. i thought the other one was reductive and not up to the usual quality so it’s nice that you qualified it.
This touched on a lot of important issues surrounding the making of art.
Artist and art lovers alike, can learn much from this.
Not all good art is expensive, and not all expensive art is good.
And by good, I mean what you will enjoy.
So good art is the responsibility of both the artist to create and the art lover to find.
just wanna say thanks for that message at the end. that really helps.
I love this videos message. The idea of the tortured artist has become this justification for pain and has artist thinkin "I SHOULD be creating or else I have no right to be sad" heck my mother almost stopped me from getting help for my bipolar disorder cause she thought it would make me less of an artist. So thank you for the message at the end
as a young artist I needed to hear this so bad thank you.
Please, do you have a reference for this quote, “she's not sitting down to make art shes trying to get through the day”? I love it.
Love these videos. They challenge me in my craft and I love your insight. You also have a great voice! New subscriber 💓
I don't know if there is anything to mental illness leading to great art, but I can attest having struggled with things in my personal life, that art is able to provide a safe haven in the ugliest of storms. When I draw or especially when I paint, there are no thoughts, just motion, it can be overwhelming. It happens through, it takes over. Art provides a welcome escape from the torturey stuff. I can't believe I went 35 years swimming in an ocean of art and never picking up a brush. I finally get that plastic bag scene from American beauty. It's changed my life. It's like the world is on fire now, every detail... in a good way I mean. Great video as always.
I couldn’t help but break down by the end of it. Thank you, for once I didn’t have to feel my emotions through a proxy.
Indeed depression is most likely to freeze you and make you quit art making rather than making it happen. What drives you to sit and make art is sensibility in all it's shapes, towards your inner world and towards reality. However, it's true that specially teenagers idealize suffering and are afraid that by taking a pill you will lose inspiration and what defines you mostly, which of course is quite far from the truth. Great video!
I’m going through a very difficult period right now; trying to create a story and accompanying music. Mood swings, trauma, anxiety, depression, fear of lukewarm reaction, doubt, etc. It’s hell.
Thank you. I really needed to hear this.
This video made me so emotional. I loved both! Thabks for the good work.
What am amazing, humane presentation. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Damn, I can't stop watching these! Love you!
I’m a mixture of things like pure curiosity and logic to deep pain and insensibleness from losing 3 friends to suicide within a year to comfort and piece of seeing people laugh with me and making food for those I love and watching their smiles. My work reflects this, it can be haunting and maybe even hard to look at or warming, hopeful and intellectualize about it.
Love this channel. Always interesting, I think Ill just watch for a minute to see whats up and get sucked in, so interesting. thank you
mmm okay
Van Gogh is the finest painter of them all, certainly the most popular great painter of all time, the most beloved, his command for colour most magnificent.
He transformed the pain of his tormented life into ecstatic beauty. Pain is easy to portray, but to use your passion and pain to portray the ecstasy and joy and magnificence of our world; no one had ever done it before, perhaps no one ever will again. To my mind that strange wild man roamed the fields of Provence was not only the world's greatest artist but also one of the greatest men who ever lived.
As a writer, I know it’s hard for me to write a good story when I’m depressed. It’s when I’m happy and I go back to re-read what I wrote in my depression that it wasn’t very good and needed rewriting
art is the only thing that gets me through living with cptsd. I can't handle the exact words i use to describe myself that you used to describe louise bourgeois. I love this channel
Cannot stress enough how much i love your channel
The 10 Rules For Students and Teachers from John Cage that you reference is a life changer!
Wonderfully presented, I identify with every word.. I don't make art for other people, make it to get through the day
it really is quite hard to create are when in the tortured state, but i have found it easier to make art reflecting on the tortured state rather than making art based on more optimisic thinking or good memories. but i try to make things based on good memories to balance out the things that come out of bad memories. i think an artist who does this really well is Keith carter. From the nostalgic "fireflies" to a more melancholic "goose head". Great episode as usual
Never stop uploading on this channel ... NEVER
As an artist myself - I find it hard to paint from a place of pure happiness. It is the pain that causes the need to produce work for me. As a song lyric goes -“I need the struggle - to feel alive.”
Dear Mdm, I was bestowed with the name tortured artist from pastor Jeff whom I see him as my own Father,I left my country Indonesia since I was ten, came from a broken family.I was loved by my grandfather, he sent me to Singapore for education which lasted for six years,china for two years and Taiwan for ten years,and because I crave for more,I was invited to work in jinjiang south of china and I pursued my passion I was made a scapegoat in the first month and I travelled by my own to shanghai and Beijing.I chose this path to pursue education which was to be a designer.I loved drawing since I was young. However,throughout this journey in other different countries,I was blessed with bipolar depression, suicidal thoughts and hallucination, depersonalization, and derealization. I was having derealization, and every second of screaming in my head yet I was nominated in taiwan polylight design award, my artwork was published in Taiwanese magazine during my college years. I had my experiences to sleep on the street,among the trash ,in mental hospital, for observation and rehabilitation,my clothes were stolen,I am feared because I am tall with unstable emotion and yet I survived. With all respect,I believe in righteousness and kindness, I believe in compassion as Father in Heaven has loved me.I would like to sincerely get in contact with u personally, I would be honored to share anything within my brain.Thank u and bless you...I would be sincerely waiting for ur reply.with best regards.
I love the video, it's very true you don't have to be tortured. I wish I could make art when I'm on my meds though. When I take my meds, I don't care to make art, and after a while, it thrusts me into some pretty scary places. So in a way, making art is a way to escape suicidal feeling, but when I'm working, I just go through all my past toils in my head. There's just no way to escape it it seems.
Watching this wile taking a break from working on the same comic page for 2 days lol. I don't suppose I'm "tortured" but I could be. I've been through my fair share of trauma. But I have a generally cheerful disposition and a lot of people are surprised that I'm artistic and actually know quite a bit of art history. I've been through some funks, but I find it difficult to make art when I'm depressed, so this myth has always fascinated me.
I couldn't paint until i had a nervous breakdown and was diagnosed with bipolar. My psychiatrist explained that the part of the brain associated with addiction and depression is also the same part that is associated with creativity. Painting and creating scratches an itch that in the past would have been relieved with detrimental and extremely dangerous behaviour.
Hi. Would you consider having the transcript available in full for your videos? They are packed with so much valuable information and insight, and I would love to be able to have the text in front of me for future reference.
Exactly I'm a painter and major in studio art and people are like "must be nice" but painting requires a bit of isolation and is extremely emotionally and physically draining but I'm not happy until the end result or if my decision making came out better than I intended.