DATING ADVICE for Women 30 and UP ..

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  • Опубликовано: 6 окт 2024
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    #relationshipadvice #datingadvice #marriageadvice
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Комментарии • 567

  • @HardlyInitiated
    @HardlyInitiated  27 дней назад

    👉DATING CARDS: hi.hardlyinitiated.com/datingcards

  • @ZeebeautyInfluencer
    @ZeebeautyInfluencer Год назад +73

    I believe that with faith anything is possible I am 35 yrs old woman serial entrepreneur and disabled God sent me my fiancée this year after manifesting and faith we got engaged after 1 month of knowing each other and plan to marry next year. The way he treats me with all my health issues and supports my business and loves me no amount of money can make you feel this great. My advice for woman over 30 is to make a list know your non negotiable and don’t waste your time when you know the person not for you

    • @KingDavidTBE
      @KingDavidTBE Год назад +16

      Make him sign a prenup

    • @H2O5519
      @H2O5519 Год назад

      @@KingDavidTBE agree...

    • @ZeebeautyInfluencer
      @ZeebeautyInfluencer Год назад

      @@KingDavidTBE We already discussed that and he agreed

    • @rejectionisprotection4448
      @rejectionisprotection4448 Год назад

      ​@@KingDavidTBEYes, I got suspicious vibes after reading that. Engaged after 1 month? Mmmm..............

    • @LaFemme101
      @LaFemme101 11 месяцев назад

      ​@@KingDavidTBEperiod!

  • @NRenee111
    @NRenee111 Год назад +48

    My children's dad proposed after 7 years, and 2 kids. We met in college. I turned down the proposal and moved out. You know when things aren't meant to go to that level and sometimes we sit around waiting but knowing the truth all the while. That proposal came after years of me being miserable and suicidal. God really lifted me out of a place I shouldn't have been in, in the first place.Y'all both know when it's that time but people get comfortable and complacent and trauma bond.

    • @Kashmir-lt4cx
      @Kashmir-lt4cx Год назад +1

      @NicoletteRenee is it cause you felt like a llllllong placemat, like the last option and/or been breadcrumbed the whole time?!

    • @ItsTheExperience
      @ItsTheExperience 9 месяцев назад

      Good job Empress.......

    • @groovetech7972
      @groovetech7972 8 месяцев назад +1

      How can you give a man 2 kids and 7 years who is as bad as you say he is?
      What was the need to stay there just to create a broken home?

  • @christinecooper4256
    @christinecooper4256 Год назад +79

    Echoing what she said: quitting drinking is one of the best things you can do to age gracefully, ladies! People are usually shocked when I tell them my age-- being sober for 6 years is a huge reason why. And it makes keeping a healthy weight so much easier!

    • @Spokentruths725
      @Spokentruths725 Год назад +1

      Yes after this vacation i will become a social drinker 😂

    • @donnajordan3540
      @donnajordan3540 Год назад +1

      More

    • @designzbyjulez9838
      @designzbyjulez9838 Год назад +1

      I agree. Drinking can age you drastically. Do everything in moderation.

    • @ibanez856
      @ibanez856 Год назад

      I’ve rarely ever had alcohol in my life and look like an old hag lol

    • @femoravans3520
      @femoravans3520 10 месяцев назад

      ​@@ibanez856😂

  • @lisalove4183
    @lisalove4183 Год назад +27

    I was married for 22 years till my husband died and now I'm 53 and I don't even want to date, because I am having to much fun dating myself 🎉❤

  • @j.dawson842
    @j.dawson842 10 месяцев назад +5

    FACTS: "Women are not taught how to be intentional with positioning themselves for love or bringing the love they want into their lives"

  • @jacobiedwards2955
    @jacobiedwards2955 Год назад +33

    As a man I completely understand needing affirmation and encouragement. However cheerleaders don’t win championships, coaches do.
    This fear of “masculine women” is fear of being told you’re wrong, that you’re not gonna follow my every word, and not following me blindly.
    I want someone in my corner who’s gonna sharpen my wit, challenge my thinking, and make me better. Not someone who’s gonna be a yes man.

    • @Godsdaughterymap90
      @Godsdaughterymap90 Год назад +1

      Exactly! Is waterinf each other. I onced dated this guy who was bothered by me asking questions relevant into getting to know him. Well, it was alot of them. They were more focused on other things physically then actually getting to know me and see if I added to them or vice versa.

    • @dodji582
      @dodji582 11 месяцев назад

      Hahaha 😆 😅 😂

    • @dodji582
      @dodji582 11 месяцев назад

      Gud luck with that 😂

    • @zero1188
      @zero1188 11 месяцев назад +1

      Not necessarily. The fear is she doesnt really like you, she there to change you into the man that she likes. She be doing that stuff if she acceped you for who you are

  • @katbrooks4462
    @katbrooks4462 Год назад +35

    I am glad she stated at 52, why she has never married. At 53, I have been married twice, 3 adult children, and still working on me to get the best of me, to attract the best example of GOD for me, that is out there. And Yes! Approached on a regular by races even outside of my own. Timing is everything.

    • @frankieroberson3398
      @frankieroberson3398 Год назад +4

      Honestly, I commend you because same age; although, I have never been married; I am like you working on self; and making better choices; not only for me but for my grandchildren; because I definitely don't won't to be bringing some creep around my grandchildren; and older women often times with don't put this into the equation when were selecting a mate for the later half of our lives!!!!

    • @MrTwonetwone
      @MrTwonetwone Год назад

      They only wanna bang you out nothing more

  • @larecashon6759
    @larecashon6759 Год назад +8

    This Will help a sister out with what I’m about to say regarding 0:01 - 0:48 I know of a young lady who was with her boyfriend for 7 years. She wanted to marry and he didn’t. I told her of a how she’s giving “her milk out for free”. He will not buy the cow, if you’re giving the milk for free. She immediately understood what I meant. The next day, she moved out his house and stopped giving her body to him. Months later after moving out of his house, he proposed to her and they married within that year. Over 10 years later they are happily married with kids. Their business and every they own are taking off. Only those who are ready to receive, will understand the morale of the story.

  • @MichelleWilliams-jp9gg
    @MichelleWilliams-jp9gg Год назад +34

    Women should be married before moving to another city period... before she can pack up and leave everything behind including her job and Kids.. some men will move you from your family and then start controlling you even when you think you knew them daily.. I do advise every woman to get close to God allow the spirit to live in you so that way you would know when God sends you the right man...

    • @Ayommari
      @Ayommari Год назад +3

      That's why I feel she is a pick me because she didn't give the realistic answers to these questions. The average woman doesn't benefit from moving from where she is behind a man and leaving her career behind. A couple should move together if married and based on the job/career of the person in the relationship who has the most trajectory - if its her then move to where her job takes her. If its him then move towards where his job is taking him.

    • @carlawhite3912
      @carlawhite3912 Год назад

      :0vv😊v😊v0😊😊😊😊$glv😊😊b😊😊hhhg😊😊bb😊vbb:😊bb😊v😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

    • @Godsdaughterymap90
      @Godsdaughterymap90 Год назад +3

      Yes please! I am always willing to relocate but to my husband not just any men. Distance will continue to be an issue if I am not your wife. I will NOT live under the same roof with no men who is not my husband. I am 33 and I will continue to not live with a men without being married!

    • @sheaNERD
      @sheaNERD Год назад +2

      Yes thank you for saying this ❤great advice. I’m 30 and a travel nurse in California. My future husband must retire me from my job before I move away from my family home to another location with him

  • @tannyshayearby8698
    @tannyshayearby8698 Год назад +35

    When do we stop surveying and gathering data and choose a woman to be committed to? Men have become so picky, they pick you apart and they don't even have it all together. We have so much more access to so many more potential partners and information, we are paralyzed with indecision.

    • @genovasquez8361
      @genovasquez8361 Год назад

      Men have a dual mating stratagem.
      1. Is she just fxckable
      2. Is the someone I will love
      In my 46 years most women I have had long term relationship I never wanted to marry. When I was 30 I met an 18 year old. She was the first woman I ever met, that made my wife.
      We divorce in 2010, I have not met a woman since her that I wanted to marry. Just sex only.
      Three things of value I judge in a future wife
      1. How your body looks
      2. How you please sexually
      3. How you treat me and cater to me
      Looks wise there are three types of women I would marry.
      1. Skinny girl with small breast and small booty
      2. Skinny girl with big breast
      3. Slim girl with big booty
      All three must have a flat stomach or she just sex. A fupa or pudge makes her just sex.
      For a sex partner only I seek BBWs and thick chicks.
      You can have a great body, and you can cater to me. But if your sex doesn't wow me or make me a little scared of you because you make me climax when you want me to climax then your not for me life long. But your fun the moment.
      I can get sex and make myself ejaculate with any woman. But it's rare I can lay back and do nothing while a woman rides me and milks my soul up out of me..
      Unfortunately that doesn't come from experience. In fact the best sexual partners I ever had were women who gave me their virginity and I taught to please me.
      Women with higher body counts never please me. I make myself come.
      I digress. When will men stop surveying women and choose wives. When they ready for marriage. When I wanted a serious relationship I was 29 years old I met sierra she was 18...we had a lot of sex but she didn't want a relationship. She just wanted sex. When me and her broke up. My ex wife approached me 6 months later when I turned 30...my ex wife was 18....she had all the characteristics I look for in a wife. So when she mentioned she wanted to be married I asked her to be my wife.
      I'm 46 years old .the 24 year old I'm dating now from Chicago doesn't want marriage or children. She wants lots of sex. She is not the type I would marry because she is not skinny. But she is childless and has huge boobs so she is a great sex partner.
      I know some slim girls who know how to cater and treat a man, but they don't make me orgasm..I make myself come.
      I know some women who are great at treating a man good and catering to him but they don't make me come and they are fat.
      I know some women who can make come and our skinny. But they are not compatible because they too old and wouldn't be able to give me lots of children if I married them or they simply aren't consistent with pleasing me sexually probably because they older. But they also aren't good at treating me how I want to be treated outside of sex and them having a slim body they are not ideal for life long partnership atleast not for me.
      Now I know there some women out there who could please a man sexually and are everything a man wants in a wife when it comes to treatment. But these women are all fat.
      I tell women when we see you. How you look plays a big part if your the girl I want to love from the first time we have sex, or you the girl I would have sex with if I'm desperate and in need but your not what I'm attracted too.
      Men don't like fupas. We tolerate it to get our nut off....big girls need love too:"pxssy is pxssy".
      But we not trying to marry her big. After she has our kids she can get big due to age and childbirth. But if she stays big, we might leave her for someone younger when the kids are grown and gone.
      Most women who have never had a man proposed marriage to her simply need to get slim or skinny. An the women who think they got the game and gone with it. But never had a man who was financially stable or husband material asked her hand in marriage she needs to work on the three elements.....
      1. Body and looks
      2. Consistent frequent involuntary ejaculation
      3. Cater and spoil him at all times
      I have a list of ten things all men need and what all women need.
      Women seem to fail to realize we as men don't need the same things as you.
      You women need
      1. Companionship
      2. Quality time
      3. Intellectual stimulation
      4. Affection and intimacy
      5. Security
      6. Attention
      7. Conversation and communication
      8. Trust
      9. Respect
      10. Honesty
      We as men don't need these things.
      We don't care about travel, spontaneity or adventure..we like structure, order and predictability.
      Women travel for experiences of different cultures like the food, the scenery, the ambiance, and the people and how they live.
      We as men travel for work and for sex with slim built exotic looking women. We really don't like traveling. The men who tell you otherwise are just doing it to keep getting sex out of you or to keep being with you in a relationship.
      If all men could get sex with out ever going in baecation or never taking a woman on a date they wouldn't do ever.
      The men who get sex with out dates don't go on dates. Men who do take women on a date have fewer options.
      To me dating just means we fxxck and talk on the phone.

    • @Darealist5629
      @Darealist5629 Год назад +1

      I can say the same thing for women.

    • @nenajay3174
      @nenajay3174 Год назад +4

      @tannyshayearby8698 I agree. I think part of the problem is: 1-social media-access to so many people from all over
      2-the callous attitude about relationships these days. Everyone is disposable, and what one won’t do, another will.
      3-People do too much too quick.
      I agree that a number of men are very picky these days. Not masculine at all.

    • @nenajay3174
      @nenajay3174 Год назад +1

      @tyrealist5629 Sometimes.. But women have always been pickier than men. It’s a feminine trait.

    • @Darealist5629
      @Darealist5629 Год назад +3

      @@nenajay3174 Well said. I can agree with those. I just want black men and women to understand those factors.

  • @lamonticharity1371
    @lamonticharity1371 Год назад +74

    At the end of the day, dating is synonymous. We attract what we are. For example, I’ve always been a solid guy, I have never attracted or dated someone broken. Stable people like other stable people.

    • @xKingUVHearts
      @xKingUVHearts Год назад +4

      Needed this

    • @robynwinfield4024
      @robynwinfield4024 Год назад +3

      Oh, this is such a good message. Thank you, thank you, I am 57 years old. I guess maybe I’m old fashion. But I still believe that you need someone and learn their character. And they have to walk the walk. Love is action, a verb. Jesus said come learn of me it’s beautiful. I have to believe that love is real. I taught my boys what you’re saying. I grew up without a father. I meant Jesus when I was 33. He taught me how to raise my boys. So thank you. I could say so much more but I’m gonna quit. I love this. It’s so true.

    • @lamonticharity1371
      @lamonticharity1371 Год назад +13

      @@robynwinfield4024 yes, I’ve been with my wife for almost 8 years now and Love has never been difficult for us. We have our problems here and there but I would do anything for her as she would do for me. God gave me my soulmate and I believe we are blessed because we are both good people. She brought Jesus in my life and I brought health and fitness into her life and we are working right now on being the best we can be for each other.

    • @H1GHD3FF
      @H1GHD3FF Год назад

      You full of crap

    • @GrigaGal
      @GrigaGal Год назад

      Agree

  • @foreverchanel2903
    @foreverchanel2903 Год назад +9

    MORE!!!!
    Listennnnn 30 year old single woman here! Me and my friend is having conversations about this episode like we in a book club!

  • @digthewarmth
    @digthewarmth Год назад +71

    Thank you Dr. Stacii for saying that women NEED to date and be assertive! I saw advice recently to stop dating because "God will bring you the man you need", and that was TERRIBLE advice! and single women were cosigning it, saying "Amen". No way! God helps those who help themselves!

    • @kyki8512
      @kyki8512 Год назад +15

      The bible teaches us to make Jesus the most important in our lives! The bible also teaches us that we are to give our lives to Christ FOR HIS GLORY and everything that WE NEED will be added! I have made Jesus the most important in my life! I have given HIM my heart! Nothing on this earth last forever! Only the things done for Jesus will last! My relationship with Jesus is most important to me and I look for Jesus to lead me in all things.... daily! I do not seek worldly advice from anybody about anything! I go to God in prayer about everything! It is the man who chooses a wife so I disagree with a woman being aggressive or assertive seeking a husband! The way I personally believe that a woman should prepare herself for a husband is by trusting Jesus with her life putting Him first and keeping herself pure!

    • @Trombonegoddess86
      @Trombonegoddess86 Год назад +3

      God will bring a woman a husband. She needs to use the discernment God has given her.

    • @f3042
      @f3042 Год назад +5

      @@kyki8512 Yea….I think the point is that a man isn’t going to drop on a woman’s doorstep. Being assertive doesn’t necessarily mean you’re asking men out and planning all the dates or chasing a man. It just means if you actually want a committed relationship that leads to marriage you have to put yourself out there in the world to interact with people.

    • @kyki8512
      @kyki8512 Год назад +1

      @@AugLaz2 😂😂😂😂SMH..........I'M TAKEN and I am happy! I laugh because some of you do not think first before you respond to someone's comment! You respond without even knowing someone's personal situation! 🥴 And some of you don't realize that you are caught up in today's gender wars! It's like you are beginning to become mentally programmed by talking about the same things on the internet over and over again! SMH I only made my original comment to basically get the point across that it is mandatory for the people who sincerely love and serve God to put HIM FIRST and follow His loving guidance concerning all things! God teaches HIS PEOPLE to first seek the Kingdom of heaven and then HE will add everything that WE NEED! I don't need dating advice sir.........I am more than good! Take care and have a blessed day!

    • @Cre8tive71
      @Cre8tive71 3 месяца назад

      God doesn't need our help... That's why he's God, and we're not. Because we will mess up every time.

  • @shirlsshirls8594
    @shirlsshirls8594 Год назад +18

    The pool is significantly smaller for finding successful and child free man who is husband material especially if she wants a black man. Let’s just keep it real. Also, from what I’ve seen and heard, dating a man who isn’t happy with his financial status is a dangerous choice for a woman.

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад

      Yupppppp.

    • @DerickFaisonSpeaks
      @DerickFaisonSpeaks Год назад

      ABSOLUTELY!!! IM GLAD SOMEBODY FINALLY SAID IT!!! you cant date or marry a man who is not happy with his life!!! its a recipe for disaster! it is better to let him take the time to get his life straight...then to rush him to anybody alter! you will regret it!

  • @latishawilliams4605
    @latishawilliams4605 Год назад +15

    MORE of Your platform is needed. Much love and respect to you brothers for having vital conversations and guests of substance 💯🙏🏽

  • @curvonnathompson4815
    @curvonnathompson4815 Год назад +5

    It took me and my husband 7 years to get married, we got together when I was 22 and got married when I was 29. 1st kid at 27, 2nd kid at 30. We both decided we needed to build together before getting married and it was best for us! Learn your man ladies and keep learning him! Well eachother…

  • @Yayasbirthandbeyond
    @Yayasbirthandbeyond Год назад +9

    More. This was the best episode I've seen since watching the past few weeks. Dr Stacii was absolutely on point. I have been working on myself for the past three years and everything has been working out! 'Can't just sit on the couch'. Thank you for this.

  • @nenajay3174
    @nenajay3174 Год назад +10

    I respect all professionals. I’m always open to hearing what relationship experts have to say, however I don’t take it as “law”. A lot of what they say is common sense and things we’ve heard since we were young. I never understood why people searched for answers to broad questions…•Should a man…, Should a woman…?” There usually is no one or right answer. We are all different and so are our individual preferences and desires.
    I think sometimes we make things way more complicated than they are. I find that the surest way to find love is to be yourself (assuming that you are a decent person), relax and enjoy the pursuit or pursuing of your interest. Listen to your heart. Chemistry is the key component.

  • @Kelsky1
    @Kelsky1 Год назад +5

    Yessssss this Lady helped me land an ammmaaazing man! I recommend her all the time!!

  • @cynthiareynolds1941
    @cynthiareynolds1941 Год назад +9

    Dr. Staci you are correct! Taking care of yourself
    I drink occasionally
    I have never smoked or did any drugs in my life
    You are what you eat
    I do meditation and pray daily. Working on my inner self is very important. I just turn 55 this year!

  • @Kiley1981
    @Kiley1981 Год назад +11

    I most definitely enjoyed this episode as always! Dr. Stacii my sister and I appreciate all the advice you provide. As single women (For now), your information is truly valuable! You discussed keeping a man's attention which can be a challenge. Thank you for elaborating on this and so much more.

  • @michecostafaith
    @michecostafaith Год назад +8

    Much respect to this Queen 👏🏽 She spoke FACTS the whole way

  • @rachiereeree6002
    @rachiereeree6002 Год назад +7

    MORE. Love these podcast, Stacii is amazing. Thank you! Keep up the amazing work yall.

  • @3DSuccess
    @3DSuccess Год назад +40

    If women over 30 have more baggage and failed relationships, I would imagine men over 30 have the possibility of the same thing.
    I feel people are afraid and will continue to find more things based on their fears that keep you from finding true love.

    • @Ayommari
      @Ayommari Год назад

      @@H1GHD3FF Based on what data?

    • @Coachkenny11
      @Coachkenny11 8 месяцев назад

      Im 32 and had failed relationship in my 20s and been in a new healthy relationship with a 25 yr old woman and newborn...life is awesome haha

  • @user-np3zc1ps9w
    @user-np3zc1ps9w 11 месяцев назад +2

    Keep the grown up classiness coming, gentlemen. Thank you again ❤️

  • @veeboss4853
    @veeboss4853 Год назад +6

    I see Dr. Staci point of relocating for a man as a single woman, however as a single woman with a child, especially a special needs child. That is a WHOLE DIFFERENT topic! My friend and I would love to come on and discuss being a single mother and coparenting mother to autistic black boys, and dating. We have a podcast dropping soon

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад +5

      No single woman should relocate for a man. That is dangerous.

    • @MB-jp4hg
      @MB-jp4hg 10 месяцев назад +1

      I agree that there is a lot more nuance needed when discussing relocating for a relationship. I definitely believe that compromise should be factored into the equation as well.

    • @EmpressFerra
      @EmpressFerra 10 месяцев назад

      Yes relocating when you have a child and co parent or have shared custody is not possible and if a man is actually free of anything tieing him to a location then he should be willing to relocate if he feels she is the one. As a mom myself I definitely understand. I had 2 siblings that were special needs (one I helped my parents care for) and I definitely get how relocating for partner would not be ideal.

  • @GrigaGal
    @GrigaGal Год назад +25

    A mother knows she’s suppose to take care of herself first always but sometimes you run into situations where your being responsible by not exposing your children to unnecessary heartbreak from dating and meeting the person your dating and it fails. I feel that’s unhealthy for children. So that leaves mothers single only because she’s being a responsible parent . My opinion of course 💕

    • @halfpynte8977
      @halfpynte8977 Год назад +1

      I agree, that's exactly how I feel.

    • @groompeacock
      @groompeacock Год назад +1

      💯

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад +1

      And that concern is likely because the father is inactive.

  • @cynthiareynolds1941
    @cynthiareynolds1941 Год назад +4

    This is good information . Actively listening is very important . Being assertive is very important. I will always step outside the comfort zone.

  • @buddhabritt1985
    @buddhabritt1985 10 месяцев назад +2

    And yea that was me too. 7 yrs my 1st child, his 4th. He wanted me to prove he should marry me. He lived with me and didn't help me pay rent (in my parents home, my childhood home) only once and it's $300. June 2022, that was it for me.

  • @PerfectlyAshley
    @PerfectlyAshley Год назад +8

    I’ll be glad when we stop saying….ladies, what are you still doing with him after this many years and start talking to ALLLLL the men that are holding onto women for … however many years….because these men are obviously the ones keeping this cycle going.

  • @Samantha-dt2fu
    @Samantha-dt2fu 11 месяцев назад

    more
    More! I appreciate all that was covered on this episode. Thank you all Sooo Much.
    Dr. Jackson droppin Gems

  • @dianeoconnor7253
    @dianeoconnor7253 Год назад +2

    More! 60 plus widow!😍 Love your show! Keep up the good work Kings👑👑

  • @missamerica2694
    @missamerica2694 Год назад +31

    There needs to be more education centered around teaching men how to be good partners and husband material for desirable women seeking mates! These men are really clueless and in need of guidance!

    • @genovasquez8361
      @genovasquez8361 Год назад +2

      That's not the issue men who was seeking go after the women that they want,
      When I was 30 and finally ready to be committed. It only took me 9 months to find the woman I would marry 2 years later. The first girl I met was young she was 18. I was 29 and her name was sierra, She didn't want marriage or a commitment. She wanted a purely sexual relationship with an older guy., We lasted 3 months and 6 months later Shoshanna approached me she was 18 and I had just turned 30. Two years later I married her.
      Point is when a man is seeking a commitment of any kind be it long relationship or marriage. He goes out and finds it.
      Men don't need to be taught anything. We only commit to certain types of women. An every other woman we see as just fxxxckable.
      A woman can say what ever she wants, it doesn't matter if we see you as just fxxxckable that's all you will ever be.
      How good is your sex
      Attitude and persona
      Behavior towards me
      Body shape and size
      These three things that tell me if she is for love or just 2 fxxck.
      What you say doesn't matter it's how you look and how you treat us. And for me it's also dependent on how you have sex with me too.
      These things will tell me if your just for short time or a long time

    • @nenajay3174
      @nenajay3174 Год назад +8

      @genovasquez8361 The statement you responded to was about men being better partners/husband material. There are some good man who embody that BUT there are also those who don’t have a clue-and that goes for men already in relationships and marriages.
      Women get married for many reasons. Sometimes it’s for money/security. Sometimes it’s just what is expected, what was taught. Either way, being with someone doesn’t mean that the person is boyfriend or husband material.
      There are a number of men that seem to think that just by being born male alone makes them desirable to women. And too often when women speak about what is wanted from a man, the conversation then switches to what we should be. Women have always been taught how we should treat a man (how to attract, treat, tend to, pet egos, etc). I think the comment was speaking to the same energy being put into efforts from a man as it pertains to dealing with women.

    • @genovasquez8361
      @genovasquez8361 Год назад +1

      @@nenajay3174 men don't need effort, do you know why. Because we are the ones who proposed marriage. Women are the ones who submit to becoming our wives. About 80% of the serious relationships I had we're with women who wanted to be married to me. I can name a lot off the top of my head.
      Even now there are 5 women I am in long term relationship with that want to marry me.
      In my 46 years I only met one woman I wanted to marry and I did make her wife. Since my divorce in 2010 I have not met a woman I seen for anything more than just fxxxckable.
      1. It's women who are saying they dating with a purpose after 35.
      2. It's only Women saying men over 40 don't want commitment.
      3. It's only women saying men want the cake and eat it too.
      4. It's women saying it's hard to find a man who wants to settle down.
      5. It's only women saying they are tired of men just using them for only sex.
      6. It's only women Saying men don't approach them anymore.
      7. It's only women complaining
      Women saying dating is hard and the dating pool sucks.

    • @genovasquez8361
      @genovasquez8361 Год назад +1

      @@nenajay3174 "women have always been taught how we should treat a man, how to attract, tend too and uplift his ego."
      I certainly hope this is untrue. Because most women over 30 are actually better suited for lesbian relationships, either y'all have no clue what men want, or you know and refuse to do it.
      When I was on Facebook telling women what we as men need. Sistas was quick to say that's not all men, you can't speak for men. Etc.
      But when I list the ten things every woman needs from a man sistas would say your right but men need those things too.
      I say no we don't need what you need. We need other things.
      Ten things every woman needs
      1. Conversation and communication
      2. Affection and intimacy
      3. Intellectual stimulation
      4. Respect
      5. Honesty
      6. Trust
      7. Attention
      8. Quality time
      9. Companionship
      10. Security
      Now there are things you want like spontaneity and adventurous and travel companions but the things I listed are what you need above.
      We as men don't need any of those things.
      Some things you know because you heard it over and over again
      1. Cook and clean
      2. Be submissive and obedient
      3. Silence is golden dont talk so much
      4. Be our peace ie don't talk so much
      5. Feed our ego, empower us
      6. Look like eye candy we are visual
      7. Be youthful and young
      8. Slim waist flat stomach
      9. Give us sex several times a day
      10. Give us variety (poly or other women)
      These things you know inherently.
      You said pet his ego, how emasculating and belittling. You pet a dog. Why not use words like edify, empower, uplift and flatter
      You are so quick to try to humble and knock a man down a few pegs. That's why we have to lie and cheat on y'all to keep our confidence up high in order to combat your need to belittle us.
      We as men need variety of women..that's why they have a main chick or first wife.
      And you have concubines, mistresses, side chicks or secondary wives.
      We don't need your respect . We prefer your submission and obedience.
      We don't need you affection and intimacy we just need sexual intercourse every time we asked for it.
      We don't need constant conversation or how was your day when we get home.
      Run us a bath. Or take a shower with us. Then give us a back and foot massage and then some sloppy toppy.
      You say you want a good leader. But when have you ever been a follower to any man?
      I don't need spontaneity I need predictability.
      Things you want is not what we want as men.
      We want routine and structured and order.
      We want peace and quiet some times..not 40,000 words a day.
      We need sex every day. We need our cake and eat it too. You and two other women run a train on us once a month in addition to your daily sexual duty.
      Do your duty as a girlfriend and wife.
      Not because of your emotions.
      This is what we need.
      But y'all not listening.
      We are turned off by weave, tattoos, ready made families with another man's children, eye lashes and make up.
      We like black women who look natural and beautiful like in the 90s, 80s and 70s.....
      These things you obviously don't know or don't care.

    • @kayannthegreat
      @kayannthegreat Год назад +6

      ​@@genovasquez8361You're showing exactly what she's saying. You're totally missing the point.

  • @lorettaelliott4481
    @lorettaelliott4481 Год назад +1

    Thank you for revealing We should never judge people unless we hear the history

  • @nailahdawkins
    @nailahdawkins Год назад +1

    More!
    I remember seeing Dr. Johnson on 'Put a Ring on It'. I didn't know she was in her 50s! That's amazing. I love the gems she gave. She is a powerful woman and is genuinely helpful. Thanks for bringing her on.

  • @jamilajorden916
    @jamilajorden916 Год назад +5

    Love Stacii and I love the conversation!

  • @Ayommari
    @Ayommari Год назад +9

    Sisters this is why married women live shorter than single women and why single women are happier. Ms. Johnson can meditate and pray an hour a day because she is single. Most of these female relationship gurus telling women to jump through hoops are all single and know all too well how difficult it is to try to deal with a lot of the men in the black community, along with kids and everything else. April Mason is single. Iyanla Vanzant is single. All of these women have opted out of dealing with men because it is literally a second job. OR the men who are hailing them as giving wonderful advice and being great women - none of these men want them.

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад

      💅🏾

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад +3

      Also, if men are THAT pressed about weight, then someone like me (as a naturally thin person) should have TONS of men pining for their attention, rather than being shocked at the one man in every few years who finds them attractive. Women may have some high criteria (maybe), but men have such absolutely unnatural expectations for women smdh.

    • @EmpressFerra
      @EmpressFerra 10 месяцев назад

      Honestly while a lot of things she says is still good insight and advice for women...I did feel like some things she was saying didn't quite hit. Then I hear she's in her 50s, single and never married. She looks great for her age for sure and I see why. Yes marriage and kids can stress a person out and literally age them much faster. There's a lady who is in her 70s and looks as good as this lady and she admitted that she never married and only had 1 child. She dodged get the hassles. 😂 Honestly I can definitely tell women that men today are far too demanding and unrealistic with their expectations. There are plenty of women who are just as guilty. However I have seen far more women bend over backwards for a man, marriage and family than I've ever seen of men. Not a good thing.

  • @kayannthegreat
    @kayannthegreat Год назад +11

    Freezing eggs you also gotta pay storage fees like 1k per year.

  • @struss87
    @struss87 8 месяцев назад

    MORE. …This is my first time tuning into Hardly Initiated. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Thanks for adding healthy dialogue to the male-led relationship podcast space!

  • @veronicacrosby7507
    @veronicacrosby7507 Год назад +2

    More!! This was a great conversation ❤

  • @foreverchanel2903
    @foreverchanel2903 Год назад +1

    Whewww this episode!!!! First off this was my first time hearing of your channel. Apparently I’ve been under a rock But you all have definitely gained a new subscriber!!!

  • @christinecooper4256
    @christinecooper4256 Год назад +2

    She was great!! "More" please. Would love to hear her talk more about ways to tap into your magnetic femininity

  • @susanamoreno2032
    @susanamoreno2032 Год назад +12

    Respectfully, first time I’m tuning in your channel.
    Gentlemen both of you are also 30 plus and it would be respectful for both of you to address to women without always saying “as they get older” as if because we’re 30 plus makes us distinct from you men at 30. I know many women that are 30 and above and they are very well taken care of, attractive than a lot of men that are 30 plus respectfully. It should go both ways…. Meaning as we both sexes age….. etc.
    I hope you take the comment constructively, blessings! 😊

    • @shirlsshirls8594
      @shirlsshirls8594 Год назад +1

      Men in their 30s think they’re not a day over 25. They see women their age as older women while they themselves aren’t older men. It’s their delusion.

    • @dodji582
      @dodji582 11 месяцев назад +1

      Women age like milk while Men age like a fine wine 😂.

  • @nenehoward8629
    @nenehoward8629 Год назад +4

    I have a six figure income, however my husband makes way more than me. We don’t compare or compete. We complete, each other that is 😊

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад +2

      That's because he makes way more. Unfortunately, can't say this would be the case if the positions were reversed.

  • @osa9354
    @osa9354 Год назад +7

    That part! 13:40. Even though its so small is SO TRUE. I had to learn to allow space for a man to do for me. Changed my life

  • @donyaleprintup9467
    @donyaleprintup9467 Год назад +12

    A guy over 30 has baggage as well. A lot of dads would not want their daughters dating an older guy and their daughters are in their twenties. I definitely would dislike a older guy dating my twenty something year old . He has probably been married and has not learned from his mistake. He probably has children he denying. He probably cheats. The list goes on and on. I feel the same about women as well. Let these twenty year olds enjoy their life without tainting them.

    • @ThurstMETV
      @ThurstMETV Год назад

      Wow don’t you have a negative view on men lol. If this is all you see in older men then sheesh

    • @alfonsinakay333
      @alfonsinakay333 Год назад

      💯 correct!

    • @bdott1538
      @bdott1538 Год назад +3

      @@ThurstMETVsaid feels the same way about women.

    • @Ayommari
      @Ayommari Год назад +3

      @@ThurstMETV He literally said that he feels the same way about women. Can you read?

  • @valeriegude6620
    @valeriegude6620 Год назад +1

    I love you guys. Y'all guest are 🔥 I love how Y'all curate this show. Real useful knowledge is shared. MORE please ❤

  • @kingsleycharlamagnethadood595
    @kingsleycharlamagnethadood595 Год назад +6

    I am 41 and single and tired of trying but what should we really do? Who is truly available to help us. It’s a great to watch these videos, but who can really help us personally? I don’t have these coaches available in NC (that I know of). I think you all makes this sound easy, but it literally is so hard to find help, so I stay tired of trying to no avail. But interesting discussion!

  • @shay_d9795
    @shay_d9795 Год назад +1

    More...absolutely enjoyed this convo. TFS ❤

  • @Whisperwarrior
    @Whisperwarrior Год назад +2

    I’m 32, single mom of 3! Dating is nonexistent!!! It’s just hooking up and situationships! I’m sooooo discouraged!

    • @dodji582
      @dodji582 11 месяцев назад

      Hahaha 😂😂.

  • @jodynanci
    @jodynanci Год назад +5

    If he got 5 kids and they ain’t a set of twins I ain’t dating him. Especially if he got multiple baby mommas

    • @livinmabestlife
      @livinmabestlife Год назад

      Me too

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад

      They would have to be quintuplets, and even that's a "no". Men are out here professing to the world how they'd never consider a single mother, even to 1 child or if she's a widow. No care for character or commonalities. Yet we'll _possibly_ consider a father of 5 kids...

  • @cmw1riternboro
    @cmw1riternboro Год назад +2

    My ex was always throwing up in my face that I made more money than he did..I didn't care about the money. I cared about being happy. We both worked hard and at one time we worked in the exact same roles. I didn't know that by earning more money than my boyfriend bothered him for years.

  • @ShamaraGrant1244
    @ShamaraGrant1244 Год назад +2

    Tuchman… forming stage first 6 months, storming stage their after where you face conflict and learn how to resolve it using info gathered at forming stage. In forming it’s important that you learn your partners conflict handling style and conversation style, as well as their personality and their dreams. If you guys are emotionally, sexually , intellectually and directionally compatible your storming stage will be a little easier to handle. That is if you guys understand how to quickly fix solvable problems and compromise on perpetual problems. Continue to learn about your partner and continue to turn toward them. This will help you guys in the norming stage where you set the rules in your relationships and they become norm-- if all these are done well, you’ll get to the performing stage. Comparability is very important.

  • @BELLANELLA7
    @BELLANELLA7 Год назад +1

    That is such great solid advice,to write it down to see if it’s fear or intuition. I started doing that recently without knowing that I was doing that but I did that couple weeks ago about a guy that I’m seeing from out of town and it truly does help me to get through and to be able to communicate with him Effectively

  • @aleyastorm
    @aleyastorm Год назад +1

    This was a good interview. Good food for thought..

  • @traceylove3625
    @traceylove3625 Год назад +1

    More! Love when she visits!

  • @coreyblevins5769
    @coreyblevins5769 Год назад

    More please … when she said I listen to what they’re rly trying to say behind what they’re sayin .. I did that for a week and had men chasing me down just to be in my presence so they can feel heard .. thank y’all for the knowledge

  • @LadyCandi
    @LadyCandi Год назад +2

    YESSSS LISTEN THROUGH!
    Make those moments count to empower your man!
    Then throw some sweetness on it! You hungry? Let me make you something to eat…… let’s go do your fav thing to make you feel better!
    What do you need from me in this moment?

  • @LadyCandi
    @LadyCandi Год назад +19

    Men need reassurance too. They are human and anyone in the place of uncertainty don’t feel good.

    • @xKingUVHearts
      @xKingUVHearts Год назад +1

      Agreed, as young man about to be 31 this year. Unless you’re an athlete with good character, it takes longer to get your shit together. In this time we have to be patient and diligent so that we can see Gods will done through us. Not all men think this way but for the ones on their purpose it’s hard to date because of expectations. Women will ultimately want marriage and a family so understanding that we have to prepare ourselves for that role. In that takes time.

    • @xKingUVHearts
      @xKingUVHearts Год назад

      nevermind the username this account i’ve had since my sidekick days.

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад

      ​@@xKingUVHearts: But women are getting their stuff together by then... in a patriarchy. So what's going on here?

  • @ChanLove8
    @ChanLove8 Год назад +2

    More! I would love to hear how one 30+ should position themselves for marriage and how should a woman be assertive and not aggressive.

    • @Trombonegoddess86
      @Trombonegoddess86 Год назад +4

      For a woman, standards and SET BOUNDARIES = assertiveness. Having set boundaries usually leads to an air of confidence about you that men respect. That’s been my experience. I’m a quiet, reserved, very introverted woman and I never had an issue with men approaching me. If they weren’t up to my standards, they could usually tell from how I carried myself and they would try to be better. I’m married now, but this is information I always tell women. Men respect a woman who has firm boundaries. It’s a quiet assertiveness.

    • @sassarific
      @sassarific Год назад

      @@Trombonegoddess86 how did you meet your husband? I ask because I'm also very introverted.

    • @Trombonegoddess86
      @Trombonegoddess86 Год назад +1

      @@sassarific we worked together at a bookstore. It was his second job he was working just to have a bit of extra money. He didn’t really need the job and you could tell by his work ethic when he was there lol, but I’m glad he took that job or we would not have met.

    • @sassarific
      @sassarific Год назад

      @@Trombonegoddess86 that’s lovely 🥰

  • @LadyCandi
    @LadyCandi Год назад +1

    Awww darn I missed it! Was out celebrating the 4th with the little.
    This is a great conversation!

    • @LadyCandi
      @LadyCandi Год назад

      Yessss I love her comment about being open and available. The energy you exude is felt by others.
      Men who are looking for that woman will see you.

  • @janellewilfred6216
    @janellewilfred6216 5 месяцев назад

    Please bring back doctor stacy...I loveeee her.she is sooooo good.live her energy and realness

  • @Tnc874
    @Tnc874 Год назад +3

    A man would want a woman under 30 so he can give her some baggage. He dont want to deal with the baggage, he wants to leave you with some baggage 😮

  • @charicecheverthesteamologi9548

    This was real talk...I could only sigh at some of the advise! Taking inventory of myself!!!

  • @amariethe1458
    @amariethe1458 Год назад

    I subscribed before the episode even let out and went and followed her. She’s phenomenal!!More for sure!

  • @yvonnevillarreal1589
    @yvonnevillarreal1589 5 месяцев назад

    More! Loved this episode

  • @natianacaldwell
    @natianacaldwell Год назад +2

    Thank you guys sooooo much I learned alot

  • @carpediem1667
    @carpediem1667 Год назад +7

    I truly enjoyed and learned so much on this channel. Dr. Staci is great, she taught some important lessons that I'm definitely going to be the person I want for myself. I just don't know how I can get him onboard since he's stuck in his ways?🤔✌🏽❤️

    • @kayannthegreat
      @kayannthegreat Год назад +1

      Start on one behavior at a time. It will build confidence. You can do it!!!

    • @StaciiJaeJohnson
      @StaciiJaeJohnson Год назад +2

      Keep working on being the best of you, learn more about you from the relationships you have had with men. The best of you will come from those lessons you will learn. The right man will fit perfectly.

    • @StaciiJaeJohnson
      @StaciiJaeJohnson Год назад +1

      Thank you so much. 😊

  • @womanontherize
    @womanontherize 2 месяца назад

    I love how she basically is saying that your the problem and have to just do it!

  • @Ol1v1as_world
    @Ol1v1as_world Год назад +7

    Why can't the man change location to make the relationship work? I just HATE how EVERYTHING HAS TO FALL ON THE WOMEN in order for a relationship to be successful. There are times where I have jumped through hoops, and walked on fire and so on and so forth and still only end up with the players, liars, drug dealers, unemployed, so I've just stopped altogether with trying to have companionship and if I need stimulating then I have fingers and toys and fantasy thoughts, I'm not too busy, I'm just too tired and if it's for me great and if it never happens then I'll just die alone...phuck it

    • @nenajay3174
      @nenajay3174 Год назад +2

      Exactly!!
      Relationships are two way streets. There has to be compromise. We all have to do what makes sense for us.
      I’ve noticed that risk podcast caters to men though.

    • @Heyu7her3
      @Heyu7her3 Год назад

      Right. That is SUCH dangerous advice.

    • @kiaracouch9315
      @kiaracouch9315 Год назад

      High Powered Podcast Princella listen to the girl for what applies to you and your life.....she speak alot of real stuff

  • @GrigaGal
    @GrigaGal Год назад +4

    I am that mom my son was/is my highest priority. I wanted to do everything to provide my son all opportunities and to best man God and I desire and see for him as man . I chose not date . Now I’m out here and dating is so different the mind set is different the lack of appreciation respect and being thankful is no longer. There’s a higher percentage of each sex expecting things when they know nothing of one another or just spoke for a week . Where’s the healthy minds and individuals looking for a loving healthy growing laughter communicative supportive relationship…..let’s grow together and embrace each other with peace . My son is all I prayed for married with children and appreciative. I know it’s my turn now and I will be assertive 😊. Great discussion thank you

  • @lashellmiller8664
    @lashellmiller8664 Год назад +1

    More.Good Job Fellaz was needed 😘

  • @cloudnationmedia8326
    @cloudnationmedia8326 Год назад

    Salute to the Doc for dropping a masterclass sheesh!!💯

  • @veeboss4853
    @veeboss4853 Год назад +2

    As a new single mother, HELL YES I VET DIFFERENT!!! No one is perfect but I have no time for foolery and terrible character. Which is why I prefer to date men with kids around the same age is my son cause I need to see how you treat a toddler vs a teenager

  • @brianonganga2636
    @brianonganga2636 Год назад

    Legendary going down! Great stuff!!

  • @starrblack7359
    @starrblack7359 Год назад

    MOREEEE!!!!!!!! THIS WAS SO GOOD!

  • @Godsdaughterymap90
    @Godsdaughterymap90 Год назад +2

    Love your shirt " Keep women femenine".

  • @trackstarbraidsbyteshonadd6901
    @trackstarbraidsbyteshonadd6901 10 месяцев назад +1

    5 years is when I told my son dad we getting married or aint nothing happening after this... and we sure did break up-- Yes mam' speak

  • @tiffanylittle8225
    @tiffanylittle8225 Год назад

    More. Really enjoyed this conversation.

  • @ShereeCampbell-i5z
    @ShereeCampbell-i5z 9 месяцев назад +2

    I’m not approaching a man I’ll die alone. Sprinkle sprinkle

  • @msscorpio14
    @msscorpio14 Год назад

    Captivating, endearing, delightful ❤🔥

  • @MissJaynet
    @MissJaynet Год назад +11

    I was definitely Miss I'm busy but I want it lol. Working a job and trying to achieve my personal goals is alot. But I'm making an effort this year to start making myself available... also since I got to my 30s I feel I have more options. I get more attention from older & younger guys. Im at the point I'd rather date older though. I have no interest in men in their 20s. Most guys I've run into in their 30s: they are kinda broken, baby mama drama, back forth w/a gf, and are at the point they are over their marriage. I jus cant with them. I'm not their savior. It took alot out of me trying to be. People have tried to make me feel bad for being single with no kids but I know if I had settled with one of the men I've dated seriously, I definitely would have been a devastated single mother. Im not trying to go out like that. Don't understand why some don't get that.

    • @kayannthegreat
      @kayannthegreat Год назад +3

      Keep looking for the right guy! He's out there!!!

    • @MissJaynet
      @MissJaynet Год назад

      @@kayannthegreat thank you 🙏🏽🤗🙌🏽

    • @DeaconChriss
      @DeaconChriss Год назад +1

      Women over 30 shouldn't be looking for husbands, you should already be married. At this point it's better to just give that up and focus on helping the younger generation of women.

    • @MissJaynet
      @MissJaynet Год назад +8

      @@DeaconChriss 🤣🤣 oh God here we go.

    • @nenajay3174
      @nenajay3174 Год назад +4

      @then.a.r.cperspective3092 Plenty of women and men get married over 30. A lot of people consider marrying younger than 30’too young to settle down.

  • @nenajay3174
    @nenajay3174 Год назад +2

    I appreciate the conversation but I know enough to understand that a lot of relationship talk is subjective. I can respect other’s opinions (most of the time) but it all boils down to personal choices.
    It’s very easy to say after thirty for women. Usually you have more options-older and younger men.
    All relationships should be mutual, compromise on BOTH ends. And, serious relationships should be about more than the physical.

  • @jeremyrankin7505
    @jeremyrankin7505 Год назад +2

    Freezing eggs sounds so crazy to me

  • @jazzminejohnsonmba9131
    @jazzminejohnsonmba9131 Год назад +1

    Great episode. More 😉

  • @monraea26
    @monraea26 Год назад

    I enjoyed this episode. I love her insight. Imma check my CED.

  • @SheRuns2024
    @SheRuns2024 Год назад +1

    Another one! Enjoyed this, in particular with her being just a few years older than me never married, no kids. More practical advice to take onboard. I particularly liked the "writing down the facts" part because I continue to struggle with knowing when my hesistancy while dating a guy is because of fear or because of my actual intuition....it's MOSTLY been my intuition smh lol, though there may have been some I let go for the wrong reasons, but I'd rather know that while in the midst of dating vice after I've stopped seeing a guy. This has been a life lesson that I haven't conquered and it's taking me years....

    • @ashajeremiahqw8775
      @ashajeremiahqw8775 9 месяцев назад

      Just why take advice from her

    • @SheRuns2024
      @SheRuns2024 9 месяцев назад

      @@ashajeremiahqw8775 I’m confused by your comment. Please expound.

    • @ashajeremiahqw8775
      @ashajeremiahqw8775 9 месяцев назад

      @@SheRuns2024 uhhh why take advice from a single woman if your tryna get married. If your not than I understand

    • @SheRuns2024
      @SheRuns2024 9 месяцев назад

      @@ashajeremiahqw8775 ok, now that’s how you expound. Say what you mean love🙂. And I hear ya. That’s a fair point. Not really sure why you felt the need the comment, though, without explanation and without offering advice of your own.🤔

    • @ashajeremiahqw8775
      @ashajeremiahqw8775 9 месяцев назад

      @@SheRuns2024 wow 😀

  • @cynthiasmith8461
    @cynthiasmith8461 9 месяцев назад

    More! Thanks great info

  • @FifiRich392
    @FifiRich392 Год назад

    I love the energy my hosts ❤❤❤all the way from Botswana

  • @kelseyfisher6759
    @kelseyfisher6759 Год назад +6

    Why in the world is the health of the woman not alert of this conversation? Because honestly a healthy woman who has reduced toxins and changed her lifestyle is not going to run the same risk. Please dear gawd can we talk about something more than career and age in numbers!!!

  • @jesagreene
    @jesagreene Год назад +1

    She was great!

  • @georginaramsden4640
    @georginaramsden4640 6 месяцев назад +1

    We need an episode on how to date intentionally but not come across to a man as rushing a relationship pleaseeee

  • @alexusj9437
    @alexusj9437 11 месяцев назад

    More!! Great show

  • @linesias26
    @linesias26 Год назад

    So insightful........Definitely more

  • @iyccooks7168
    @iyccooks7168 Год назад +1

    I love and appreciate Dr. Stacy!❤❤
    Could the camera man stop showing the interviewer on the phone while the guest is talking?

  • @feleciaweaver38
    @feleciaweaver38 Год назад

    More! Great show!!

  • @shakiramcknight9485
    @shakiramcknight9485 Год назад

    Good advice dr. Staci

  • @ashlinaash5612
    @ashlinaash5612 Год назад

    ITS AN HONOR

  • @fortheloveofdecorandmore
    @fortheloveofdecorandmore Год назад

    More!! This was good