Another thing that perked my ears is when OP's SO said, it doesn't hAve to be all or nothing. That may be a hint that OP had become habiuated to dichotimous thinking. If so, she's a keeper because that's high level patience and love and Im glad that he has her.
Story 1, OP I am proud that you have excepted your niece and give her a chance, I understand how the emotional pain came back after seeing her but she understood her parents and grandparents wrong and wanted to show you how forgiving and understanding she is, I hope you too are in good hands now.
Every time I hear some BS about "family comes first," it makes my fuggin blood boil to a steam. These people treat their family members like absolute shit, but expect them to just let shit slide. Family ain't shit, at that point.
For those who actually say family is everything in situations like this. The proper response is well. I was nothing to you so I guess I was never family
OP in story 1 is really sweet for accepting his niece in his life 🥺 good for him. Good for her. Most people wouldn't have even bothered with her, but he wanted to try. I can only imagine how he felt seeing someone with his brothers face just standing on his doorsteps..damn the hurt
If i was in his shoes, i still eould accept her. Even though she might be a reminder of yhe child who could have been mine, i still have to remember that she was still a child. She didn't choose to be in a situation like this
S1: I get what he's going through and how hard it can be to move forward. I'm glad he decided to have a relationship with her. I think he should take comfort in the fact that the people who really hurt him are gone. Lily is his nephew, but sins don't pass through blood.
I'm so sorry you had to go through such a painful and difficult experience. Cutting ties with family is never an easy decision, but sometimes it’s necessary to protect your mental and emotional well-being. I hope you’re finding peace and building a supportive circle of people who truly value and respect you.
@KarmaTube5 oh I get that, trust me. I've only met my father's side of people a hand full of times and haven't met them since, so I understand. I just wished the story would've at least mentioned it about her
Story1. I would let her in my life , the problems are dead and gone so it would be ok to connect with her . Its not her fault her parents and grandparents were horrible people im pretty sure they looking up at her. Op sounds like a very weak man
Definitely taking her in on the conscience of 'Not another abandoned soul who had no one else', but OP was going through a shit storm of a past, and the PTSD still lingered, so that sentiment can't just be flicked away even after two decades. He lost his then girlfriend and his family disowned him without a thought to apologize or make amends. That alone is enough to make them resent anything that would relate to them, especially when the niece looks similar to her father/OP's brother, that's just a walking reminder and trauma. Sure it's not him, but the relations make it hard. No, OP's not a weak man, he's just one to not want to care about his past anymore, him not forgiving his brother and parents is just him not wanting to look back at the people who wronged him and looked to the future. After all, he never dared to look back to get away from that hellhole. Guessing he took the past is the past, look to the future, advice, but was whiplashed when the past came back to him.
@@groadmiralinerika2540Maybe its because I'm from a different culture than you. People today over uses the word trauma and PTSD a lot. This guy IS weak.
Sometimes a wound needs to be opened to drain the infection and heal. You don't need to forgive them, but you need to forgive yourself. Lily is the medicine to heal yourself and forgive yourself.
Story 1 where's Mom's family. I wouldn't trust Lilly. She wants something. Be careful. Story 2 Dad is just as bad. He saw what was happening and did nothing. "Bw the bigger person" means be a better doormat. Cut off everyone who supports your sister and birth giver. Tell Tom any communication go through your lawyer. Stay strong and don't back down. Being neutral means supporting Megan.
If the niece is a minor there’s no way she would’ve just shown up out of the blue, CPS would’ve been involved. Additionally, custody should’ve gone to some other next of kin, a great aunt or uncle or something, not an estranged uncle that hasn’t even met the girl. Overall the niece tracking down OP sounds too good to be true.
S1: op really needed to ask himself what was he afraid would happen. Worst case scenario his niece turns out to be like the others to which he could just block out again. But he doesn't't have his entire childhood invested in her like he did with his brother and parents. And now he has a happy marriage for support. It seems like a pretty safe leap to take and has the potential to be therapeutic for op. Op did eventually get the idea of forgiveness though. He decided up to then that forgetting was the solution, but our memories treacherous friends and it is better to learn how to remember without reliving, and forgiving can help with that.
Mom's response to her daughter cheating with her other daughter husband is the same response to the cheater would give maybe mom is a cheater and Dad don't know it
I have an older brother that I despise I won't state the reasons but his kids have done nothing to me my shit with him starts and ends with us his children have nothing to do with it and he knows that despite the fact that I can't stand him I hold absolutely no grudge towards his kids and would help them with anything if I was capable of which unfortunately I am not able to
@@NeoCreo1They're not holding her responsible. Like Mr, they just don't want anything to do with the situation. Why yall always gotta push your moral bs on people?
Breakup happened 19y ago, kids 18.. is that 18 years from the date of the breakup, or 18 years and x months from the breakup.. might make quite an important difference.
I was doing the math too. By the story, it would mean his Ex was pregnant before Op1 found out his brother smashing his Ex. I say Op is very human, how can one accept a literal reminder of that betrayal that looks like his brother instantly? Best to think heavily than anything else
@@Zephyr_Talemaster I would say it raises a question that absolutely should have been answered, they were brothers, not twins, so DNA testing would put the questions to rest. That his wife and brother were trash and liars is not in question, whats difference would another lie have made to them when they still lived.
Story 2. It always shocks me how anybody can side with the cheater. I also wonder how they spun the story to get them on her side, maybe making it sound like a one-time mistake when it was going on for half a year and she was bragging about it. Why is this the go-to response from cheaters that it "wasn't serious." I'm pretty sure sleeping with somebody when you're in a committed relationship with somebody else pretty well falls into the category of "serious". Especially if it happened repeatedly. One time when seriously impared.... a big maybe, but more than once or even once while not seriously impared, no way, that's just betrayal plain and simple.
Wow, you guys suck. She has done nothing to deserve such treatment. The people who were assholes to him are dead. I’m blown away by your myopic selfishness.
How can the first OP who grew up in a Golden Child situation say she had a family that had each other's back? One of the 2 children being the Golden Child proves that's a false narrative
I can guarantee story 1 is fake, He is the only family she has left, no mention of her mothers family that would have been significantly easier to get hold of, and as soon as I hear a perfectly recalled word for word conversation, I call bullshit.
@@NeoCreo1 That is a possibility, given the word for word recorded conversations (which, to be fair, could just be the writer trying to re-create) I'm usually leaning towards fake, I really feel like he would have mentioned how the other side had no family,.
Story 1 He is a real man. Personally speaking, there wpuldnt have been a period of consoderation. I coupdnt allow a teenager to go at it alone in this world. I would immediately take her in and teach her everything she would need tp know to survive and hopefully thrive as an adult.
Story 1 wow op entitled family, bastard brother and ex gf were scumbags, karma send them to early graves and they have plenty of time to mend things but their rotten prideful ego think they didn't do anything wrong yet short lived but lily was a kid who didn't know what happened. I bet she was disgusted what her grandparents and parents did to her uncle and glad op reconnect with his niece
Story 1: Ah yes the old Man up and be a real man comments. News flash, he wouldn't be less of a man if he just shut the door and went on with his life. If that was me? Nah. I'd apologise to her and tell her that I had no family as they were all dead, We may be related by blood but aren't family. Wish her well and get back to the people who you've built a life with aka your real family. BUT, this is a AI story... too many inconsistencies and lack of other grandparents kinda seals the deal.
Other grandparents could simply be dead too. That’s hardly a smoking gun. As for me, I’d definitely judge him for cutting her off. He would be holding her responsible for the sins of others and leaving her to fend for herself. It may be understandable, but it would still be incredibly selfish to do.
This poor kid had nothing to do with OP's past. Your choice to either way. But man up and try! She is a teenage girl with NO support system. You should at least attempt a relationship. She family and alone. Remember when it happened to you?
She is not guilty nor innocent, just irrelevant and s complete stranger, I wouldn't let a stranger into my home just because we share 25% of DNA. Anyway those fake a$$ stories like yo use the name Lilly 😅
Story one. Your brother and parents are long gone. I understand THEIR Betrayal cut you deeply. But your neice seems genuinely interested in just establishing contact with the only "family" she has left. Small steps is they way to proceed. Those who hurt you are gone. Its time to let go of the past and embrace the future. BTW your wife sounds like a gem.
S1 Notice no explanation for what happened to "Lily's" maternal family. Authors of fake stories never seem to actually have had a life experience. Also, her mother, OP's ex, is never mentioned at all. Especially by Lily. Very weird.
OP is not responsible to have a relationship with his ex girlfriend and his brother’s kid! She is the grandparent’s responsibility! If you wish to have her in your life okay if you don’t okay! Your parents died and you were not informed! Your niece has the other set of grandparents, other aunts and uncles!Your choice NTA either way!
![[Full Story] My Husband and My Mil Were Excited When I Was Pregnant With Twins but...](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/x6y9wBZu0zE/mqdefault.jpg)
![[Full Story] My Husband and My Mil Were Excited When I Was Pregnant With Twins but...](/img/tr.png)
When his niece said I'm not here to apologize for my grandparents or my father, that was the opening he needed.
Another thing that perked my ears is when OP's SO said, it doesn't hAve to be all or nothing. That may be a hint that OP had become habiuated to dichotimous thinking. If so, she's a keeper because that's high level patience and love and Im glad that he has her.
why would she apologise for her dead ancestry behaviour?
Story 1, if OP really wants her in his life then he can but he owes her nothing, he shouldn't have to destroy his peace of mind for her sake
She is so entitled like her parents. She got the trash existence by nature and he should keep her out if his life.
💯💯💯
Story 1, OP I am proud that you have excepted your niece and give her a chance, I understand how the emotional pain came back after seeing her but she understood her parents and grandparents wrong and wanted to show you how forgiving and understanding she is, I hope you too are in good hands now.
Every time I hear some BS about "family comes first," it makes my fuggin blood boil to a steam. These people treat their family members like absolute shit, but expect them to just let shit slide. Family ain't shit, at that point.
For those who actually say family is everything in situations like this. The proper response is well. I was nothing to you so I guess I was never family
OP in story 1 is really sweet for accepting his niece in his life 🥺 good for him. Good for her. Most people wouldn't have even bothered with her, but he wanted to try. I can only imagine how he felt seeing someone with his brothers face just standing on his doorsteps..damn the hurt
💯👍🏿
Because it's ai.
@@MrCreepjo it's a good AI story though 😊 hit me in the heart lol
If i was in his shoes, i still eould accept her. Even though she might be a reminder of yhe child who could have been mine, i still have to remember that she was still a child. She didn't choose to be in a situation like this
@@justisolated5621 Op didn't choose to be an uncle but here we are
Story 2 op's dad needs to do a paternity test on his two daughters because i bet her mom cheats
S1: I get what he's going through and how hard it can be to move forward. I'm glad he decided to have a relationship with her. I think he should take comfort in the fact that the people who really hurt him are gone. Lily is his nephew, but sins don't pass through blood.
Nephew? Is she in the LGBTQ community or something? 🤨
I'm sorry...Lily....nephew...?
You had me until Lily is his nephew 😂
*Niece
Damn homie done disrespected lily
Story 1. Finally someone that understands the forgiveness does not mean you forget their actions and reconcile.
I'm so sorry you had to go through such a painful and difficult experience. Cutting ties with family is never an easy decision, but sometimes it’s necessary to protect your mental and emotional well-being. I hope you’re finding peace and building a supportive circle of people who truly value and respect you.
Story 1: What about the family on the moms side. The kids' dad can't be the only one with siblings and parents. Maybe AI story
yep it's an AI story
@@jerrypluto7256 I questioned that too, like...she's never met her momma's side of people??
@@aquafebiblue93some people don’t meet all their family weather it’s Dad side of Mom side. I didn’t meet my father side of the family til I was 18
My mother is an only child and her parents/my grandparents died before I was born, something similar could have happened to her
@KarmaTube5 oh I get that, trust me. I've only met my father's side of people a hand full of times and haven't met them since, so I understand. I just wished the story would've at least mentioned it about her
Story 2: The fact that it was her sister made it a billion times worst.
3:42 Bringing what back exactly, they're all dead, they don't have any drama to bring.
emotional scars. trauma does not die with the tormenter but it has got to be a relief knowing their gone.
Story1. I would let her in my life , the problems are dead and gone so it would be ok to connect with her . Its not her fault her parents and grandparents were horrible people im pretty sure they looking up at her. Op sounds like a very weak man
Definitely taking her in on the conscience of 'Not another abandoned soul who had no one else', but OP was going through a shit storm of a past, and the PTSD still lingered, so that sentiment can't just be flicked away even after two decades. He lost his then girlfriend and his family disowned him without a thought to apologize or make amends. That alone is enough to make them resent anything that would relate to them, especially when the niece looks similar to her father/OP's brother, that's just a walking reminder and trauma. Sure it's not him, but the relations make it hard.
No, OP's not a weak man, he's just one to not want to care about his past anymore, him not forgiving his brother and parents is just him not wanting to look back at the people who wronged him and looked to the future. After all, he never dared to look back to get away from that hellhole.
Guessing he took the past is the past, look to the future, advice, but was whiplashed when the past came back to him.
@@groadmiralinerika2540Maybe its because I'm from a different culture than you. People today over uses the word trauma and PTSD a lot. This guy IS weak.
Sometimes a wound needs to be opened to drain the infection and heal. You don't need to forgive them, but you need to forgive yourself. Lily is the medicine to heal yourself and forgive yourself.
the minecraft gameply is so satisfying
Story 1 where's Mom's family. I wouldn't trust Lilly. She wants something. Be careful.
Story 2 Dad is just as bad. He saw what was happening and did nothing. "Bw the bigger person" means be a better doormat. Cut off everyone who supports your sister and birth giver. Tell Tom any communication go through your lawyer. Stay strong and don't back down. Being neutral means supporting Megan.
Maybe her mom was cut off by her maternal grandparents
It doesn’t have to be nefarious bro. Mom could have been an only child.
I loved the first story. Made me cry with a positive ending ❤!!
Story 1 sounds like it would be a pretty decent manga premise
St 1 I would had to tell her the truth about the whole situation. But I wouldn’t have taken it out on her.
In the 1st story OP has such a wonderful wife 😊
If the niece is a minor there’s no way she would’ve just shown up out of the blue, CPS would’ve been involved. Additionally, custody should’ve gone to some other next of kin, a great aunt or uncle or something, not an estranged uncle that hasn’t even met the girl. Overall the niece tracking down OP sounds too good to be true.
You can be a teenager without being a minor.
It depends on the circumstances, many teenagers live alone, some can even do so legally after a certain age.
"Be the bigger person"
Correction: Be the flatter doormat
S1: op really needed to ask himself what was he afraid would happen. Worst case scenario his niece turns out to be like the others to which he could just block out again. But he doesn't't have his entire childhood invested in her like he did with his brother and parents. And now he has a happy marriage for support. It seems like a pretty safe leap to take and has the potential to be therapeutic for op. Op did eventually get the idea of forgiveness though. He decided up to then that forgetting was the solution, but our memories treacherous friends and it is better to learn how to remember without reliving, and forgiving can help with that.
NO going NC with you mom isnt enough, she knows about your sister and husband affair.. justifying it
BLOCK BOTH OF THEM !!
Mom's response to her daughter cheating with her other daughter husband is the same response to the cheater would give maybe mom is a cheater and Dad don't know it
I have an older brother that I despise I won't state the reasons but his kids have done nothing to me my shit with him starts and ends with us his children have nothing to do with it and he knows that despite the fact that I can't stand him I hold absolutely no grudge towards his kids and would help them with anything if I was capable of which unfortunately I am not able to
Seriously. It’s kind of sickening reading so many comments that say they hold her responsible for the sins of her father.
@@NeoCreo1They're not holding her responsible. Like Mr, they just don't want anything to do with the situation. Why yall always gotta push your moral bs on people?
Breakup happened 19y ago, kids 18.. is that 18 years from the date of the breakup, or 18 years and x months from the breakup.. might make quite an important difference.
I was doing the math too. By the story, it would mean his Ex was pregnant before Op1 found out his brother smashing his Ex.
I say Op is very human, how can one accept a literal reminder of that betrayal that looks like his brother instantly? Best to think heavily than anything else
@@Zephyr_Talemaster I would say it raises a question that absolutely should have been answered, they were brothers, not twins, so DNA testing would put the questions to rest. That his wife and brother were trash and liars is not in question, whats difference would another lie have made to them when they still lived.
STORY 1: Did OP ever tell Lily what her father, mother and grandparents had done? Of if not, would he ever do so?
Story 2. It always shocks me how anybody can side with the cheater. I also wonder how they spun the story to get them on her side, maybe making it sound like a one-time mistake when it was going on for half a year and she was bragging about it. Why is this the go-to response from cheaters that it "wasn't serious." I'm pretty sure sleeping with somebody when you're in a committed relationship with somebody else pretty well falls into the category of "serious". Especially if it happened repeatedly. One time when seriously impared.... a big maybe, but more than once or even once while not seriously impared, no way, that's just betrayal plain and simple.
S2
Hope the dad divorces the mom
Story 2 follows the classic script.
Favorite sibling
Betrayal
Unsupportive parent
Unrealistically close extended family meddling
Friend supportive
Legal remedy
Therapy
Story 1: op should have just give her one important lesson...then slam the door....to protect your hard earned peace....
fair. hate to say it but the man needs deserves his peace and that person isn't his problem.
Honestly, he has a lot of options.
100%
Wow, you guys suck. She has done nothing to deserve such treatment. The people who were assholes to him are dead. I’m blown away by your myopic selfishness.
@@NeoCreo1 she is the result of that affair....op is reminded of that when he sees her....this is for his own peace of mind....
Story 2: looks like mom is also a cheater
Good
How can the first OP who grew up in a Golden Child situation say she had a family that had each other's back? One of the 2 children being the Golden Child proves that's a false narrative
Story 1: OP is a better man than me. I would've started with accusations and asked why I should believe her after what her father put me through
I can guarantee story 1 is fake, He is the only family she has left, no mention of her mothers family that would have been significantly easier to get hold of, and as soon as I hear a perfectly recalled word for word conversation, I call bullshit.
A simple rebuttal. Her mom was an only child and the other grandparents passed away.
@@NeoCreo1 That is a possibility, given the word for word recorded conversations (which, to be fair, could just be the writer trying to re-create) I'm usually leaning towards fake, I really feel like he would have mentioned how the other side had no family,.
But what about the mom doesn't come up in any conversation, like after the break up she ceases to exist
Story 1 He is a real man. Personally speaking, there wpuldnt have been a period of consoderation. I coupdnt allow a teenager to go at it alone in this world. I would immediately take her in and teach her everything she would need tp know to survive and hopefully thrive as an adult.
She is an adult.
Story 1 wow op entitled family, bastard brother and ex gf were scumbags, karma send them to early graves and they have plenty of time to mend things but their rotten prideful ego think they didn't do anything wrong yet short lived but lily was a kid who didn't know what happened. I bet she was disgusted what her grandparents and parents did to her uncle and glad op reconnect with his niece
She had a mother ???
St 2 friend says at least it was your sister not a stranger like that’s worse. Of people really see the world like this I can’t be real
Never seen a parkour that had a horse in it
people who advice to forgive a cheating partner are still virgins, no one who was in love once would even consider that xd
story 1 feels fake because whenever they go into almost entire recollections of conversations it feels fake
pretty sure story 1 is AI
Story 1: Ah yes the old Man up and be a real man comments.
News flash, he wouldn't be less of a man if he just shut the door and went on with his life.
If that was me? Nah.
I'd apologise to her and tell her that I had no family as they were all dead, We may be related by blood but aren't family.
Wish her well and get back to the people who you've built a life with aka your real family.
BUT, this is a AI story... too many inconsistencies and lack of other grandparents kinda seals the deal.
Correct, he wouldn't be less of a man if he turned her away. But he is for damn sure a good person for keeping in touch with her
@Zerefas-cm5bh wouldn't be a bad person if he didnt keep in touch.
It's a horrible situation all round but thankfully its AI generated.
@@Twist-The-Friendly-Hunter never said he'd be a bad person, but he did a good thing for sure
@@Twist-The-Friendly-Hunter probably and hopefully AI generated. I like to turn of my brain while listening to these stories lol
Other grandparents could simply be dead too. That’s hardly a smoking gun. As for me, I’d definitely judge him for cutting her off. He would be holding her responsible for the sins of others and leaving her to fend for herself. It may be understandable, but it would still be incredibly selfish to do.
S1 : mf im crying over lily story
Smh. Story 1 OP should have shut the door. Its not her fault but her face alone is going to tear open any scars he has.
This poor kid had nothing to do with OP's past. Your choice to either way. But man up and try! She is a teenage girl with NO support system. You should at least attempt a relationship. She family and alone. Remember when it happened to you?
Easier said than done. Doesn't help that she looks like his pos of a brother.
She’s a stranger he owes her nothing
She is not guilty nor innocent, just irrelevant and s complete stranger, I wouldn't let a stranger into my home just because we share 25% of DNA. Anyway those fake a$$ stories like yo use the name Lilly 😅
Because he isn't sincerely sympathetic.
@Erdrick-c9b. I hope your child is never in her predicament
Dad needs to threaten his wife with divorce if she continues with gaslighting
Story one. Your brother and parents are long gone. I understand THEIR Betrayal cut you deeply. But your neice seems genuinely interested in just establishing contact with the only "family" she has left. Small steps is they way to proceed. Those who hurt you are gone. Its time to let go of the past and embrace the future. BTW your wife sounds like a gem.
Yall married the same woman?
@@ASAP-ZAY that was supposed to be your not our lol
Dad needs to divorce mommy dearest and oop needs to sue sister for ruining her marriage.
S1 Notice no explanation for what happened to "Lily's" maternal family. Authors of fake stories never seem to actually have had a life experience. Also, her mother, OP's ex, is never mentioned at all. Especially by Lily. Very weird.
OP is not responsible to have a relationship with his ex girlfriend and his brother’s kid! She is the grandparent’s responsibility! If you wish to have her in your life okay if you don’t okay! Your parents died and you were not informed! Your niece has the other set of grandparents, other aunts and uncles!Your choice NTA either way!
Ugh. Daughters shouldn't look like their fathers.
What? A girl can resemble her father just like a son can resemble his mother. Don’t know what you mean.
@a_randomuser4 The girls I've seen that look like their fathers look disturbing. Maybe you have some thing for women that look like men, but I don't.
Story 1 he is a wimp. Brother and parents are gone. Get over it!
Story 1 dude is being a coward like stop running from your shadow dude