Yeah, he must have honestly not heard about it the way he was afraid to eat that pineapple. Can't blame him since McDonalds does it for most people. & Lets see how Burger King does out of the salt
Sorta kinda. A similar process is used to make jerky, but the moisture pulled out of the *cooked* meat is allowed to evaporate. Here it’s just transferred to the salt but is still in the jar.
There should be family lays chip amounts of beef jerky per bag Like basically replacing all the chips in a family size lays bag with beef jerky THAT SOUNDS GOOD
@@classifiedcareer8113 "The definition of meat varies according to source. For example, Webster's Dictionary defines meat as “the flesh of an animal (especially a mammal) as food” (Merriam-Webster, 2017). The American Meat Science Association defines meat as red meat (beef, pork, and lamb), poultry, fish/seafood, and meat from other managed species."
@@Jeriun then by Webster's definition pulty is still meat. It says especially mammals not exclusively mammals. If it comes from an animal it's meat regardless of what animal that is. It could be slugs or it could be beef.
@@sanicula1 yes there were wooden refrigerators that used ice blocks before the invention of the mechanical refrigerators, but salt was used for preserving meat for thousands of years before those.
It would probably just seal it off from most of the air, so it would (poorly) preserve it. That is, unless it reacts/prevents the solidification of the glue with something he puts in it.
Imagine this guy calling the poison control centre like: “Hello, I just licked the juice of some piece of pineapple that I left in a jar full of salt. Am I gonna be ok?”
Yes depending on how many you used, the salt pulls the moisture out, but if the salt was saturated and no evaporation could take place (Like with the banana and pickles), they would just sit there, half shriveled.
I think it was actionlab that did that experiment. I could be getting the RUclipsr wrong though sorry. But either way there's a video about orbeez and salt
Hey brother love your channel have been around since you started out. Could you do things left in butter. People butter dry steaks for 30 days to make it super tender
I probably wouldn’t do that with jars. From what I’ve seen, you usually have something preserved in salt able to breath so that moisture can evaporate. Prosciutto and county hams are done in cheese cloth. Cod is usually done in a box, I think it may be cedar, not sure what kind of wood. Any many things that are salt cured, fish in Asian cuisine comes to mind, are open air salt cured. I feel like in a jar the moisture can’t evaporate. This might potentially make you sick if you eat it.
Table salt doesn't remove bacteria like curing salt. EDIT: it's iodized which can cause additional chemical reactions. I should've been more clear, yes it removes bacteria but you can't use it in the same way as curing salt for removing bacteria without getting a briney gross aftertaste from the iodine. Prague powder is usually pure salt with sodium nitrate, not the table salt that's been treated to not stick together for commercial use. Apologies for the vague original wording
@@dew7555 It does exactly that. FYI, curing salt is basically table salt and sodium nitrite. The salt kills all non halotolerant bacteria in meats through osmosis, the sodium nitrite delays the development of oxidative rancidity in meats although it also inhibits the growth of some bacteria, it does not kill bacteria like salt.
this gives me ptsd because my social studies teacher in 6th grade taught us how people a long time ago preserved meat. he then bought sausages and a bunch of salt so we can preserve meat from the middle of the year to a couple weeks before school ended. his room smelled so bad because people kept opening the containers to see. i don’t know how this guy deals with the smell
If the police was there it would be like this Police: dis dude got crack In jars with food in it Tyler: it’s not crack it’s salt police: * confused police noises *
But in the 1800s they have refrigeration devices. Like the boxes that hang out of windows that they put food in to keep cool. You're about a couple centurys late
I remember when I was a kid playing with the stuff that absorbs moisture inside women sanitary pads (some desiccant gel?) trying to make hard cookies out of cake or something and I was sure that I was about to invent cake flavored cookies (hey, I wanted to be a scientist at 8 years old ok?).
Retry this exactly the same way, but use a cheese cloth cover to let the moisture escape, firmly sealed in the mason jar and the items will retain the same moisture because it has no place to go 😉😀
Cookbooks always separate chicken and meat recipes in separate sections. Typically, it’s Poultry (Chicken, Turkey, Duck, etc) and Meat (Beal, Pork, Beef, Lamb) So he’s not wrong in his classification.
The face you made after the pineapple betrayed you was golden and that alone made the whole vid worth watching 😆 all of these except for the poultry should be safe too eat due to salt's antibacterial nature.
Perserved eggs cured in salt is something some restaurants actually use well its just the yolks not the whites and they take a rasp and put it on pastas
Hey Tyler,love your stuff I got a quick tip for next time you do the salt thing......a bit on bottom,put the item in,instead of pouring for like 15 mins a container,POKE A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM AND SET THE CONTAINER ON THE JARS TO DRAIN, multiple filling at once 😉😁✌️ hope you read this and hope it helps ya bud
I grew up eating salt fish. It was delicious. My dad would salt the fish, and it would hang on a line across the kitchen. When we wanted to eat it, we’d wash the salt off, let it soak a while to rehydrate and boil it with milk and onions.
For the meats you needed to add sugar to the salt. Half pound of salt and 1/4 cup sugar. Pink salt will give better results as it contains sodium nitrite, good for staving off botulism. Try this again with the above ratios and see what results you get.
Check out the podcast ☺️
RUclips.com/tylerungluedpodcast
u could eat it all this is how they precived meat in the old days
TylerTube Leave things in Cologne for 30 days
You can cook fish in salt this is very popular in Greece its called παστά ψάρια (pasta psaria) plz try it
Five things or foods in Beer???
7:13 What about that rawhide dog bone stuff from the rawhide glue video?
Tyler: *puts meat in salt* I wonder what's going to happen
Ancient Romans: is our method of preserving meat a joke to you?
I swear to zeus i was thinkin that too
Angel Defender you sir are very funny 😐
People were still doing this up into the 19th century
@@samliedtke578 some people still do this today
Virginia ham, salt pork, salt cod
Does it bother anyone else when the jars are halfway off the table.
Yes.
I did noticed that and it bothered me alittle yes lol I wanted to move it over for him
Cringe worthy to me
My anxiety peaks every time.
Yes that’s why I came to the comments, just wanted to confirm I wasn’t alone
Me: *Watching this video*
Mom: What are you watching?
Me: I'm watching a grown man play with 30 day old, salty chicken
You're about 42000 years late on discovering salt curing.
Lmao
Glad I am not the only one who was going to say something 🙃
Yeah, he must have honestly not heard about it the way he was afraid to eat that pineapple. Can't blame him since McDonalds does it for most people.
& Lets see how Burger King does out of the salt
Yeah, but this is probably an accurate representation of the first reaction upon discovering it. Lmao
Right?
I love how he says “5 foods in salt” and has six foods in the jars because he doesn’t consider pickles food 😂😂😂
I mean is he wrong?
Soggy Meatloaf yes
@@AirsoftMemeNerd is he though? Cuz I dont think he is
Soggy Meatloaf there is nothing better than a pickle to garnish a meal
The Holy Flapjack /puke
Nobody:
Tyler: *_Pickles killed my family._*
I know that feels
I did
I love pickles
@@elsreptilesandmore1686 same
Pickles are fucking awesome
Dehydrates steak: its almost like beef jerky
Beef jerky is dehydrated steak btw
No dude, beef jerky is beef jerky. It’s not dehydrated steak. Jeez nobody knows that beef jerky is its own meat
Sorta kinda. A similar process is used to make jerky, but the moisture pulled out of the *cooked* meat is allowed to evaporate. Here it’s just transferred to the salt but is still in the jar.
@Amaterasu Beef jerky is a slim strip of beef that has been dried out. Jerky is produced from thin strips of meat, such as beef, pork, and lamb.
There should be family lays chip amounts of beef jerky per bag
Like basically replacing all the chips in a family size lays bag with beef jerky
THAT SOUNDS GOOD
@@Onyxthefem U trolling?
“we have chicken breast, we have meat” he says that like chicken breast is not meat lmfao
Chicken is poultry not meat lol
@@classifiedcareer8113 "The definition of meat varies according to source. For example, Webster's Dictionary defines meat as “the flesh of an animal (especially a mammal) as food” (Merriam-Webster, 2017). The American Meat Science Association defines meat as red meat (beef, pork, and lamb), poultry, fish/seafood, and meat from other managed species."
@@Jeriun then by Webster's definition pulty is still meat. It says especially mammals not exclusively mammals. If it comes from an animal it's meat regardless of what animal that is. It could be slugs or it could be beef.
@@LawfullSpook hehe ‘pulty’ sounds like a nick name for someone
Tyler: puts food in a preservative.
"Hey! They smell fresh!"
Lol
Chicken
@@danielpearse9875 cow
Dizz2K7 duck
The fact that Tyler is mentally unable to associate pickles as food is hilarious
Chicken
illegit damn bruh, you got the whole squad laughin😐
He killed pickle rick n his friends too
That’s because he’s right
illegit you’re a white dude between the ages of 15 and 18... I can just tell from your comment. Am I correct?
"Sir, how would you prefer your steak? Medium rare or rather well done?"
"Cured"
Tyler: Hates pickles
Also Tyler: Makes pickle jerky
Thats just his cover for buying so many pickles
Hates pickles yet includes them in every video
Tyler: *uses Katana to cut apple*
Also Tyler: *tells the apple it’s the dramatic one*
Leah Hadley what do you mean? That was a small knife.
And the apple was being very dramatic
It wasn’t a katana
“In the summer for six months” I want everyone to think about that
😂. Idk abt where he lives. But it feels like summer lasts that long where I live. He Might’ve meant that. Idk. I’m not very bright
lmaooo i just realized
He seems like he lives in either Florida or Texas so it's pretty much summer 65% of the year
He living like Phineas and Ferb
What Arizona and Florida are like
Back before refrigerators salt was the way of preserving meat.
Looking at the results, I'm so glad we invented refrigeration.
I'm pretty sure that they used ice blocks.
@@sanicula1 awe yes they would use ice blocks so they could keep meat fresh for 20 minutes and have to go grab another
@@sanicula1 yes there were wooden refrigerators that used ice blocks before the invention of the mechanical refrigerators, but salt was used for preserving meat for thousands of years before those.
@@clalam5241 ice box.... google it.
Tyler u need to left something in Glue for 30days. Like some fruits or bread. Would be cool to see what happen!
Flamingo probably nothing
Flamingo glue is just meant to stick stuff together without changing it anyways
It would probably just seal it off from most of the air, so it would (poorly) preserve it. That is, unless it reacts/prevents the solidification of the glue with something he puts in it.
it would be sticky, duh
Left Testicle when glue is sealed it doesn’t get solid so idk
Tyler: "that's what happens to apples they just get old without goin' bad".
Me: "Eat it!"
"Alright sir, your meal will be ready in a month!"
"Breadsticks while you wait?"
"Looks like beef jerky"
About that...
XD most underrated comment in this comment section! This deserves to be pinned as top comment.
Yeah.. he definitely doesn't realize IT IS jerky
I would eat that
@@JWard-sp7wt I thought it needed more time to turn into jerky.
jerky is smoked not salted
I've discovered what his problem is with pickles...he's buying mt olive pickles instead of Claussen
Vlasic are the best
@ Claussen is the superior brand of pickle...I also think it may just be a southeastern US brand
Bubbies are the best
@@silvertonebass1 I am on the West Coast and I can confirm we have them here too
No pickles are just bad and nasty
Next episode: Leaving things in my beard for 30 days
Imagine this guy calling the poison control centre like: “Hello, I just licked the juice of some piece of pineapple that I left in a jar full of salt. Am I gonna be ok?”
first!
Jerrysam113 lmaooo
Only just started the video and I can already say that salt preserves things
Same lol
Right? It's like why are you surprised that the meat looks semi appetizing? lol
Ikr
“deflated pickles” are two words i never thought i’d hear in the same sentence
Just imagine the amount of mason jars filled with some sort of item he has around his house
No one...
Literally no one:
Tyler: Lets make a steak snow angel
I can’t believe that a knife that small can cut through apples that easily
That didnt cut easy lol
@@suje809 Uuuhhh are you sure? Im telling ya, that small of a knife cut waaaay to easy for that apple.
What the hell does size if knife have to do with sharpness???
CryWolf Adam r/wooooosh
@@reddropshawty1101 jackass
NGL the editing while he was filling the jars with salt was amazing! Keep up with the great vids love them all!
If you put the orbeez in salt would they return to the size they were when you opened them?
Im 90% sure they would. Unless using them once damages internal structure
Yes depending on how many you used, the salt pulls the moisture out, but if the salt was saturated and no evaporation could take place (Like with the banana and pickles), they would just sit there, half shriveled.
I think it was actionlab that did that experiment. I could be getting the RUclipsr wrong though sorry. But either way there's a video about orbeez and salt
The more you know...
I don't need sleep. I need answers
I love how he goes "chicken" and "meat"
....Like chicken definitely isn't also a kind of meat
Technically it's a poultry so he's right
Technically, meat is the flesh of an animal.
@@Anna-tw1he poultry refers to bird animals (chicken, turkey, etc) meats refers to grass grazing animals (cows, goats, etc). I also said technically.
@@thevoiceless8308 poultry is a type of meat isn't it??? What your defining as meat I think is just called red meat
@@middlethenerd no poultry is flesh. Corpse. Not meat. The wey call dead pig pork. Meat is cultural.
"im gonna slice up the apple with my small knife"
*uses a Zanpakuto to slice the apple*
Underrated comment
1913: Refrigerators for home use invented
2020: Pre-refrigerator food storage explored on RUclips
I’m not sure... but it’s starting to seem like he doesn’t like pickles
Really? I thought he did
plot twist. HE LOVES PICKLES, just rags on them to help him get his sponsorship.
Zyss Will Can’t blame him
Maybe, idk tho. I'll gave to do some more investigation on this topic.
Wait what
Tyler’s utter inability to appropriately describe anything is what makes me love these videos 😂😂😂
him to pickles: the most disgusting thing of all
me: mmm very good
I know! I bet that dill pickle salt would have been great to use on certain foods!
Eww
I love pickles
Lukson this guy gets it
pickles probably do think of tyler how tyler thinks of them, you're right! "Him to pickles"... pickles to him.
“Let’s hope this chicken doesn’t smell like chicken”
Imagine getting murdered as a chicken and this dude puts a part of you in salt for 30 days
“That was kinda dramatic” *is using a sword to cut a apple*
Nah man its a small knife
@@aubrimus2410 no, it is a small sharpended pencil.
These videos are just a guy being a guy and I’m truly interested by everything
Tyler: we'll put one piece of steak so it's fully covered.
Also Tyler: dinner.
Tyler: Plays with bananas, "it's all floppy."
Me: He's flaccid.. leave em alone😂
Mario Contreras 😂😂
*All floppy like a condom*
~Bruno 2018
When he started to mush and pull them apart I wad waiting for him to compare it to a turd
My thoughts 😂
Maybe he's nervous
"I am assuming that it's going to be pretty safe to assume" -Tyler2020
“I only have 5 jars but 6 items”
*pulls out 6 jars*
Rinse off the salt, soak them in water overnight and they will be fine.
I’m... not sure how true this is... but I’m in no position to doubt it
No
Hey brother love your channel have been around since you started out. Could you do things left in butter. People butter dry steaks for 30 days to make it super tender
the "how it's made" shots of filling up the jars. is perfect.
Leaving food in salt will just preserve the food, nothing will happen
And he doesn't eat anything smh
@General Monkey would you eat those “preserved” apples?
He didn't vent the jars so nothing properly preserved
@@Gizmo_- Yes, actually.
@Chaotix Fox I didn’t ask you doughboy
"smells like a dog's foot"
So glad I'm not the only one who knows what that smells like
Aidan Cook ummm....u know what I’m not even going to ask how u know
@@demontimecj5816 you should TBH
What did a dog stick their foot up your nose?
@@tyre04 lol noooo it's like when you're holding a puppy and you try to kiss it and it pushes your face away. Smells like corn chips 😂
@@aidancook1329 Oooooooooooooh. Alright I gotcha.
title “leaving 5 foods in salt for 30 days”
pickles: am i a joke to you?
You should leave different types of meats in salt jars for 30 days and try to cook with them and see which will succeed
Yes! That would be awesome
Most of them will be usable
I probably wouldn’t do that with jars. From what I’ve seen, you usually have something preserved in salt able to breath so that moisture can evaporate. Prosciutto and county hams are done in cheese cloth. Cod is usually done in a box, I think it may be cedar, not sure what kind of wood. Any many things that are salt cured, fish in Asian cuisine comes to mind, are open air salt cured. I feel like in a jar the moisture can’t evaporate. This might potentially make you sick if you eat it.
ew no
What do you mean try to cook with them meat doesnt cook
Should have ate the steak it was literally just beef jerky
thatjokerperson almost, jerky is smoked and sliced really thin salted is different and tastes worse
@@rna5118 not all jerky is smoked
Table salt doesn't remove bacteria like curing salt.
EDIT: it's iodized which can cause additional chemical reactions. I should've been more clear, yes it removes bacteria but you can't use it in the same way as curing salt for removing bacteria without getting a briney gross aftertaste from the iodine. Prague powder is usually pure salt with sodium nitrate, not the table salt that's been treated to not stick together for commercial use. Apologies for the vague original wording
@@dew7555
It does exactly that. FYI, curing salt is basically table salt and sodium nitrite. The salt kills all non halotolerant bacteria in meats through osmosis, the sodium nitrite delays the development of oxidative rancidity in meats although it also inhibits the growth of some bacteria, it does not kill bacteria like salt.
@@dew7555 table salt causes osmosis and sucks water out of bacteria just like any other salt
If you ever do more of these “leave ___ in ___” videos, I’d love to see you try some other traditional preservers, like lard or mustard.
"dehydrated pickle" is a good insult for an ex partner, just saying.
You're not wrong🤣
You're a pickle
Haha that’s good
😂😂
Lol the music during the salt pouring part sounds like How it's Made music
When he opened the pickle jar
No one:
Me: eat, eat, eat, eat, eat!
this gives me ptsd because my social studies teacher in 6th grade taught us how people a long time ago preserved meat. he then bought sausages and a bunch of salt so we can preserve meat from the middle of the year to a couple weeks before school ended. his room smelled so bad because people kept opening the containers to see. i don’t know how this guy deals with the smell
Items in citric acid for a month?
Lol, read that as critic acid
@@irlclubsandwich7907 let's not get political!
@@macgyveratlarge2133
Bruh
you can be critical of things that aren't political
Oo yes this is a good idea. I’d love to watch this to help with my research
I was being sarcastic.
Can anyone else give him props for how much effort he puts into these types of vids he waits months to open 5 jars
Commitment 100
When you reach 400k your should eat a whole jar of pickles as a celebration 😂😂
Barf, I'm with him. Pickles are vile.
Thats too cruel. Maybe one slice.
@@EmilyGOODEN0UGH ew, no way. How about a good long sniff? That will garner a solid gag... LoL
Hasa Diga Ebowai pickles are good lol
Brody Massey I agree. Pickles are the food of gods
Imagine walking into this mans garage and seeing jars with white powder and food
Let's hope that's all he has in jars!
If the police was there it would be like this Police: dis dude got crack In jars with food in it Tyler: it’s not crack it’s salt police: * confused police noises *
this is genuinely one of the most entertaining youtubers i watch
Nobody:
People in the 1800's:
Thats accurate
I just got the joke. They cant text because they have no phones😆
@@cruelzuelischosen1728 you totally didn't get it
traveling_beyond_art well, in the 1800’s they had refrigerators but they used ice to refrigerate the food. This would be more like the 1000’s
But in the 1800s they have refrigeration devices. Like the boxes that hang out of windows that they put food in to keep cool. You're about a couple centurys late
I remember when I was a kid playing with the stuff that absorbs moisture inside women sanitary pads (some desiccant gel?) trying to make hard cookies out of cake or something and I was sure that I was about to invent cake flavored cookies (hey, I wanted to be a scientist at 8 years old ok?).
Your childhood was lit
Retry this exactly the same way, but use a cheese cloth cover to let the moisture escape, firmly sealed in the mason jar and the items will retain the same moisture because it has no place to go 😉😀
9:40 "Almost like beef jerky" it's literally beef jerky
Jerky isnt salt cured
Dehydrated
I was scrolling down as soon as I seen this I deadass heard him say it at the same time lmao
THATSHODDYGUY some jerky isn’t
I wanted to cook and eat that... appetizing.
Police: walks over to check why a man is half way in a bottle of powder.
Tyler: it's salt, want a smell.
he's REALLY trying to start something talking about pickles like that
Title: 5 things in jars
Video: 6 things in jars
He doesn't count pickles as food.
@@rpattzluver1234 best comment in thread
@@rpattzluver1234 😂😂😂😂
Exactly
Tyler's arch nemesis* Not everyone despises pickles like you Tyler.
Well preserving foods have been used for centuries
“We have our chicken and then our meat” as if chicken is not meat you have me cracking up
Julia Whitney thank god I wasn’t the only one who noticed that lmao
Okay but I'm a vegetarian and I constantly have to explain to people chicken is meat and I can't eat it.
@@AlexanderJasperJay same :(
@@AlexanderJasperJay yes, same with fish
Cookbooks always separate chicken and meat recipes in separate sections. Typically, it’s Poultry (Chicken, Turkey, Duck, etc) and Meat (Beal, Pork, Beef, Lamb) So he’s not wrong in his classification.
"Against my better judgement, I'm gonna lick it and see what it tastes like."
Jesus is watching you, Tyler. ✌️ 👀👉
If I had a nickel......
TlylerTube: im going to slice the apple up with my small knife
Also TylerTube: pulls out huge ass katana.
Tyler shoulda cooked that steak and tasted it.
The face you made after the pineapple betrayed you was golden and that alone made the whole vid worth watching 😆 all of these except for the poultry should be safe too eat due to salt's antibacterial nature.
Try a raw egg in salt. I'm just curious to see what it would look like after all moisture is removed lol
Perserved eggs cured in salt is something some restaurants actually use well its just the yolks not the whites and they take a rasp and put it on pastas
"Dude! Clean up that chicken juice right away!" I'm saying to myself.
Tyler: “With my small knife”
Also Tyler: *pulls out machete*
Me: uhhhhh okay
Rianna Carmichael it was a joke.
Its a katana
Its not a machete nor a katana its a weird ass ugly sword that resembles a katana.
@@erozguerrero5926 mall store version of a katanna
Who would've thought chicken that stayed in salt for 30 days smells more like a wet dog than a wet dog
That apple didn't look good when you first cut It open aha
My mom “the chicken is as moist as possible stop complaining” the chicken 8:00
Takes one tiny lick of a single pineapple piece:
"doesn't taste like an OUNCE of pineapple" - prolly cuz it isn't dude...
Tyler: I spilled chicken juice all over the table.
me:
*I hate it when that happens*
Hey Tyler,love your stuff I got a quick tip for next time you do the salt thing......a bit on bottom,put the item in,instead of pouring for like 15 mins a container,POKE A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM AND SET THE CONTAINER ON THE JARS TO DRAIN, multiple filling at once 😉😁✌️ hope you read this and hope it helps ya bud
“Let’s make a snow angel with the steak “ 😂
“Leaving wet foods in rice for 30 days”
@Apotheos uncooked rice is extremely absorbent. That's why the rice expands so much when you cook it.
Cucumbers are discussing!! Other things pickled however are awesome!!! Pickeled peppers are bangin
Had a good laugh when you said :"looks like a deflated pickle"! Love your channel!!!
Tyler: “with my small knife”
*crocodile Dundee has entered the chat*
Gg
Tyler: obviously I’m not gonna taste it that would be disgusting. Also Tyler 2 seconds later: I think I’m gonna lick it
0:50
"I only have 5 jars but i have 6 items"
Clearly has 6 jars
LOL THIS BOTHERED ME SO MUCH
Because pickles arent considered a food
Tyler: oooh look how floppy that is.
Me: that's what she said..... 🤣
TheFedorenko I would hope not
Jon Boner Jones Her: it smells like wet dog to the T
Nothing to be ashamed of, talk to your doctor
Damn... Stole my line 👍
Same
3:26
me putting a little salt on my chips.
"Welcome to TylerJar, the channel where we put stuff in jars. Stick around, i'm sure what you see won't be too jarring!"
Next up on Tyler tube: leaving milk in salt for 30 days
Is this a video? I actually wanna see it
I grew up eating salt fish. It was delicious. My dad would salt the fish, and it would hang on a line across the kitchen. When we wanted to eat it, we’d wash the salt off, let it soak a while to rehydrate and boil it with milk and onions.
Tyler: wears diesel power shirt
Also Tyler: wears onewheel shirt and owns one
I'd imagine the salt preserved the meats to a certain degree. If moisture was allowed to escape it would have probably turned to something like jerky.
For the meats you needed to add sugar to the salt. Half pound of salt and 1/4 cup sugar. Pink salt will give better results as it contains sodium nitrite, good for staving off botulism. Try this again with the above ratios and see what results you get.
"I've never smelled anything that smells as much like a wet dog as this."
wet dog: >hanging head in the corner