What's happening with the Bala family is the reality of many of us shame... This made me realize families goes through similar things regardless of our social status.
From the outside looking in: - Pinky is the deputy mum - Zwai is the control freak - Loyiso strikes me as unbothered -Jennifer seems to be the extra supportive wife with the perfect marriage and life - Pelo is the black sheep - Mum is controlled by societal pressure to be married... Or atleast to die a married woman Its quite a mess, I truly hope they get the help they need or atleast find common ground
@@heathermbambeni529 we are all doing the best that we can at the level of consciousness that we're at. Its easier to judge when you're not walking a mile in someone else's shoes. As much as we can be siblings of the same family, WE ARE ALSO INDIVIDUALS. We will not always see or understand things the same way
You are spot on..I also think Zwayi is hurt as an older brother who introduced them to music and entertainment and the least they can do is to acknowledge the assistance or role He has played. He took a role of parenting at an early age. Now that they are independent He is seen as controlling......He was not controlling when He was the one to pay Drakensberg high school yet their parents was alive
This is an eye opener to me and helps me realise that the Bala family are like my family too and respect to them for their honesty and candid about their sensitive life experiences. I hope it all works out Hle!
Trauma has no expiry date.....Child Emotional Neglect will all always play a negative role in bringing up families. In some parents, they will at times experience a blind spot in bringing up children....imperfect people trying to create perfect families. It will always go back to how our parents were actually raised up. First understand how your parents were raised up , if their emotional needs were not fully met, it would always show up in how they raise their families, hence the marriages to fill that emotional void. If one's emotional bucket was never filled, therefore there is nothing more to give. With all the education, wealth etc, there will still be something missing. With all due respect, may you all continue with therapy in order to find understanding and closure...above all forgiveness. I believe you have a loving mum. Stay positive. Life is too short.
Does the emotional bucket ever get full though 😢,it’s a continuous work in progress. And emotionally damaged people do change people who were raised well ,not intentionally.
I feel bad about what Heather is saying. Mothers are always blamed for every wrong that is happening in the family. You don't know what happened in her life at the time.
@TRUSTING Nobody Did we not watch the same show na bethuna? Zwai mentioned that,every time his mother had someone in her life, she neglected them,they didn't matter... Then Zwai and Pinky had to step in as parents at a very young age to Loyiso noPhelo
😮The mother is the problem - she puts her own needs in front of her kids shes done this since they were children. She acts like their peer and not a matriarch of the family. She also seems to add to the division between the kids instead of being a bridge to meant broken ties. When she knew Zwai didnt know about the wedding why wasnt she mature to tell her son to invite him or tell - whether ge came was up to him. Now both of them feel slighted by the same incident. And before anyone says they are adults, they were children who weren't taught how to deal with relationships because the mother was absent.
And we still have people defending single mother households, this is what happens when you raise kids in broken families, broken families breed more brokenss
I just watched Loyiso rn on TBN episode n he's in Lakewood for a Joel Osteen sermon. Man has travelled much...I wish families can understand the power of unity instead of the destructive unity of power. Loyiso should take that responsibility too.
@@mamosalimotsau9893 but she doesn't even know how to pick. Sis Pinky basically said she married a malambane whose presence made no difference in the family, financially 😂
The family is broken and it obviously goes back to the broken family structures. Mom reminds me of my own mother who never took responsibility for not uniting her children. She cannot blame Zwai for his mistakes but should take a role of a mother to show him the the way. Taking in another man to her children's home is absolutely wrong. Phelo is out of control and the role of absent father in his life is a playing factor to his behaviour. Zwai loves his family and you could tell that he did all he could to grow his family name. He is an absolute reason we know the Bala family.
I feel uncomfortable with the fact that people's family problems are consumed as entertainment, but in any case, it's the content that has been produced. Notice a lot of people keep saying Phelo is a brat. Maybe we just don't know him, but he doesn't seem bratty to me. He seems unanchored and like someone who's searching for something/someone that he trusts that grounds him. Everything else is just the product of his search. Otherwise ingathi usweet man and uyathandeka. And seems he just needs a lot of love and affirmation
That's what I picked up about Phelo. Remember all these people are very humble. Zwai, Loyiso are just normal people. I have such a soft spot for them cause I know they are naturally kind people, I can pick up the same demeanor from P
Tjoooooo guys... Family feuds are nothing new.. If we could just learn to talk to each other and not bottle up things. When left unattended, a small matter can end up being like a cancer and completely destroy the entire family..
Zwai 🤣🤣🤣, Mom is the problem she is the cause of the problem period n she is a narcissist, using her kids so much leading to disfuntional family. Unfortunately in this matter her kids should stand their grounds, infact it's not their responsibility to take care of her wants. This shows how much black families normalise narcissism and label as 'we are family', Phelo really needs help regarding his roots not ukuthwasa 😔 cause the question is which side of his bloodline family have gifted him with spiritual gift that was suppose to be clerified first before initiating take place
It's very much complicated for Phelo because the mother was married to the bala but he's not a bala by blood. Kodwa naye lobaba who abandon their kids ngenxa yemishado😔😔
It not complicated if Mrs Bala was married fully meaning all traditions, rituals were done properly when they got married with late Mr Bala, then when she got married with Phelo' s father amalobolo was suppose to be accepted by Bala family cause she belongs to Bala family, but if she didn't do any traditions n rituals for 1 marriage everything is done to her biological family. Phelo was consived before marriage or after, if before then Phelo's father must pay damages. All will be sorted from there. He is not suppose to use Bala surname cause rituals were not done from the beginning. Gobela ka Phelo was suppose to clerified first before initiation take place. Well it all about money nowadays. Phelo needs his roots period not ukuthwasa. U Phelo Uhleli ka Bala akaziwa abakhona.
@@lasembomkhize123 the mother didn't get married to Phelo's dad. The marriage they're talking about is after Phelos dad. Which means the mother kumele ahlawule bese ebika u Phelo to the Bala ancestors. But I'm not sure how it goes kwaXhosa
@@zamilemkhwanazi5562 🤭 I thought she married to Phelo's father 🙆 🙆 ok then inhlawulo is needed cause that where everything should start. Ngaze ngamzwela uPhelo cause ukuthwasa/sangoma will cause issues
Side-lining them would mean they are not regarded as family. They are family now and they deserve to know everything that happens in the family they've married into. They just need to listen more and talk less.
I'm not suggesting that they be sidelined or that they are not part of the family. But this family has deep-seated that stem from before the two joined the family. They need to break things down and get to the core of their problems without the two giving their opinions on the matter. For example Jennifer just threw in the fact that Zwai did not attend the white wedding, her intentions were not constructive and provided no aid to the problems discussed. Mr Jafta and Jen are part of the family, however, healing requires breaking down layers and having them present makes it difficult to achieve that.
No ways. Zwai is an alpha male. Very close to being toxic too but high testosterone is like that. As long as he controls it or else Zwai is indoda NDO!!!!! Others could learn
What's happening with the Bala family is the reality of many of us shame... This made me realize families goes through similar things regardless of our social status.
This is real and raw, best reality show ever
I just realized Loyiso's kids look like their aunt,she is very beautiful 😍
Kakhulu!!! ❤❤❤❤❤
Ewe but all in all they lool like Loyiso's mom cos Pinky is her mom's twin. ❤
It takes a lot for a family to open up like this to the world…there a lessons to be learnt from this show. 📝
From the outside looking in:
- Pinky is the deputy mum
- Zwai is the control freak
- Loyiso strikes me as unbothered
-Jennifer seems to be the extra supportive wife with the perfect marriage and life
- Pelo is the black sheep
- Mum is controlled by societal pressure to be married... Or atleast to die a married woman
Its quite a mess, I truly hope they get the help they need or atleast find common ground
Why is it, though our older siblings get hated on by younger siblings after doing their "best" they could to support them?
They don't get appreciated after all their good work instead kuthwe bona bazenza ngcono,ekubeni bona, they don't have people who got their backs.
@@heathermbambeni529 we are all doing the best that we can at the level of consciousness that we're at.
Its easier to judge when you're not walking a mile in someone else's shoes.
As much as we can be siblings of the same family, WE ARE ALSO INDIVIDUALS. We will not always see or understand things the same way
@@yomie7026THIS
You are spot on..I also think Zwayi is hurt as an older brother who introduced them to music and entertainment and the least they can do is to acknowledge the assistance or role He has played. He took a role of parenting at an early age. Now that they are independent He is seen as controlling......He was not controlling when He was the one to pay Drakensberg high school yet their parents was alive
Best reality show at Mzanzi this family tell it like it is wish you can upload whole episode looks like their mom was a busy woman
This is an eye opener to me and helps me realise that the Bala family are like my family too and respect to them for their honesty and candid about their sensitive life experiences. I hope it all works out Hle!
True,the 1st step to a healing journey is being vulnerable ,i give my respect to them they are headed towards a right direction .
Trauma has no expiry date.....Child Emotional Neglect will all always play a negative role in bringing up families. In some parents, they will at times experience a blind spot in bringing up children....imperfect people trying to create perfect families. It will always go back to how our parents were actually raised up. First understand how your parents were raised up , if their emotional needs were not fully met, it would always show up in how they raise their families, hence the marriages to fill that emotional void. If one's emotional bucket was never filled, therefore there is nothing more to give. With all the education, wealth etc, there will still be something missing. With all due respect, may you all continue with therapy in order to find understanding and closure...above all forgiveness. I believe you have a loving mum. Stay positive. Life is too short.
Uchan'uchwethe Xoli.
Does the emotional bucket ever get full though 😢,it’s a continuous work in progress. And emotionally damaged people do change people who were raised well ,not intentionally.
Thank you for unpacking this.. ❤
Pinki is beautiful
Plan is prayer. Love to the fam.
ijoh i feel like m watching my family🤣
Me too😢
Very relatable to the core, the family is very brave in addressing what some of us live with and trust God to give us peace over.
Families has problems. Its good they are sharing this with the whole country., a lot of famillies will learn from their situation.
I feel like Phelo feels like he is unseen and overlooked as a lastborn.
Phelo is so cute❤,Moshe didn't deserve him.I wish u all the best.
Families are going through a lot,I appreciate u guys for this show so that so many Families can learn how to solve their differences as well.
This is soooo real😊
Right! 😊
Wow, this reality show is so impressive.. So many of our own families are dealing with exactly the SAME type of issues...
OMG!! This is a mess yet so real and so relatable.
I blame uMama mna, where was she? Ngabamama abaxabise amadoda more than their children.
Don’t judge umntu omkhulu we don’t know what trauma got her into this .
uMama needs therapy on her own
I feel bad about what Heather is saying. Mothers are always blamed for every wrong that is happening in the family. You don't know what happened in her life at the time.
@TRUSTING Nobody Did we not watch the same show na bethuna? Zwai mentioned that,every time his mother had someone in her life, she neglected them,they didn't matter... Then Zwai and Pinky had to step in as parents at a very young age to Loyiso noPhelo
@@yomie7026 I agree with you 💯
I love this show this is reality ❤❤
Exactly my thoughts and opinion, this right here it's the reality of many of us🤞
😮The mother is the problem - she puts her own needs in front of her kids shes done this since they were children. She acts like their peer and not a matriarch of the family. She also seems to add to the division between the kids instead of being a bridge to meant broken ties. When she knew Zwai didnt know about the wedding why wasnt she mature to tell her son to invite him or tell - whether ge came was up to him. Now both of them feel slighted by the same incident. And before anyone says they are adults, they were children who weren't taught how to deal with relationships because the mother was absent.
Pinky is a very beautiful woman. I cannot help but stare at her every time I watch
The drama is galore in this family
Thats what i like about their show nothing is scrpted its raw
I can feel the heat from this episode
Zwai Has a big problem, which is to control everyone on the family....... Zwai, no one owes you every move of their live in that couches brother!!!
I'm loving to watch this show serious 🤞😊
And we still have people defending single mother households, this is what happens when you raise kids in broken families, broken families breed more brokenss
This show is nice
Beautiful family
I just watched Loyiso rn on TBN episode n he's in Lakewood for a Joel Osteen sermon. Man has travelled much...I wish families can understand the power of unity instead of the destructive unity of power. Loyiso should take that responsibility too.
The mother she is a mess......she puts men first before her kids...
Strooo
Thanda madoda struu
What happens when all the kids live home and have their families.. she must find her partner too Bethuna and not bother her adult children
@@mamosalimotsau9893 but she doesn't even know how to pick. Sis Pinky basically said she married a malambane whose presence made no difference in the family, financially 😂
Family issues I also feel like an outsider in my family I understand u Pelo even though we have the same parents 😮😮
Me too 🤧, I never felt the belonging
Interesting...
The family is broken and it obviously goes back to the broken family structures. Mom reminds me of my own mother who never took responsibility for not uniting her children. She cannot blame Zwai for his mistakes but should take a role of a mother to show him the the way. Taking in another man to her children's home is absolutely wrong. Phelo is out of control and the role of absent father in his life is a playing factor to his behaviour. Zwai loves his family and you could tell that he did all he could to grow his family name. He is an absolute reason we know the Bala family.
2:25 Papa Jafta ke Rre Baki😂
I also hear from people on the streets that my tamnci was getting married 🤷🏽♂️ this family😲 i didn't think rich families have such problems
This mom chose men over her kids
Exactly
I feel uncomfortable with the fact that people's family problems are consumed as entertainment, but in any case, it's the content that has been produced.
Notice a lot of people keep saying Phelo is a brat. Maybe we just don't know him, but he doesn't seem bratty to me. He seems unanchored and like someone who's searching for something/someone that he trusts that grounds him. Everything else is just the product of his search. Otherwise ingathi usweet man and uyathandeka. And seems he just needs a lot of love and affirmation
That's what I picked up about Phelo. Remember all these people are very humble. Zwai, Loyiso are just normal people. I have such a soft spot for them cause I know they are naturally kind people, I can pick up the same demeanor from P
Yoh this is so real! 🫂
This family is so disfunction because of the parent ...mama kamzwandile uyashata qwaba
Can we address sisi Pinky's beauty!!!Is she always this pretty ???Yhuuuuu after being a parent at 14...
Samthandi
relatable!!!!!
Wavele wabila sana utata uJafta🤣🤣🤣
When did a child invite a mother to the wedding, ndiyaqala uyiva
Sinjenje zidepression eziphuma kwifamily
This is too real...😬😬
Zwai 🤣❤❤❤
Right! 😂😂😂
When does this play?
Mzansi Magic Thursday 8
Every Thursday.
Am here for Zwai
Put more on youtube i dont gave dstv
Kunengoma kaLoyiso ethi "Mama come back to me" eyaculwa nanguRebecca Malope. Bendingazi ukuba isekelezwe enyanisweni. UZwai yibully
Hayi kodwa torho ! This is a beautiful family but am worried as I see mama and Phelo being truoubling here .
the mother choose men over her kids weeeeeeh
'Ndandipha ndiququzela😂😂'...
Tjoooooo guys...
Family feuds are nothing new..
If we could just learn to talk to each other and not bottle up things.
When left unattended, a small matter can end up being like a cancer and completely destroy the entire family..
I love idols
Zingxaki esihlangabezana nazo emimdenin yethu ezi kmele niyilungise nixolelane ukuze izinhane zenu zifunde kuni
Kaloku Zwayi they wanted you to be present in all those weddings bhuti remember ungu bhuti wabo kaloku
Yhooo the music in the background is irritating me because I think this is important
Jafta hai sana😂
Rha! Zwai..!
Yooo how did Phelo inherit Bala Surname ngoba that thing cause many problems in future 😢 uphahla bani emsamo 🙆♀️
Haybo were was lomama na cela caciselwa😢
Yho !!!
Where is their biological Daddy?
Died
Yhoooo lena ifamily yeya yam cwaka tu
Mine is worse yoooh tell me about it
Zwai 🤣🤣🤣, Mom is the problem she is the cause of the problem period n she is a narcissist, using her kids so much leading to disfuntional family. Unfortunately in this matter her kids should stand their grounds, infact it's not their responsibility to take care of her wants.
This shows how much black families normalise narcissism and label as 'we are family', Phelo really needs help regarding his roots not ukuthwasa 😔 cause the question is which side of his bloodline family have gifted him with spiritual gift that was suppose to be clerified first before initiating take place
It's very much complicated for Phelo because the mother was married to the bala but he's not a bala by blood. Kodwa naye lobaba who abandon their kids ngenxa yemishado😔😔
It not complicated if Mrs Bala was married fully meaning all traditions, rituals were done properly when they got married with late Mr Bala, then when she got married with Phelo' s father amalobolo was suppose to be accepted by Bala family cause she belongs to Bala family, but if she didn't do any traditions n rituals for 1 marriage everything is done to her biological family.
Phelo was consived before marriage or after, if before then Phelo's father must pay damages. All will be sorted from there. He is not suppose to use Bala surname cause rituals were not done from the beginning. Gobela ka Phelo was suppose to clerified first before initiation take place. Well it all about money nowadays. Phelo needs his roots period not ukuthwasa. U Phelo Uhleli ka Bala akaziwa abakhona.
@@lasembomkhize123 the mother didn't get married to Phelo's dad. The marriage they're talking about is after Phelos dad. Which means the mother kumele ahlawule bese ebika u Phelo to the Bala ancestors. But I'm not sure how it goes kwaXhosa
@@zamilemkhwanazi5562 🤭 I thought she married to Phelo's father 🙆 🙆 ok then inhlawulo is needed cause that where everything should start. Ngaze ngamzwela uPhelo cause ukuthwasa/sangoma will cause issues
@@lasembomkhize123 and it seems like he's in this alone nobody cares in the family.
Ngathi umfazi kaLoyiso angangaphawuli kwezinxoxo seFamily futhi angawangeni amachuku abathande bonke kodwa xa kuthethwa ezizinto zabo athule tuuu
Why are Jennifer and Mr Jafta in this session?
Because they are part of the family maybe!?
@@MentalFacility-u7o yeah but these types of things require family like blood family
Side-lining them would mean they are not regarded as family. They are family now and they deserve to know everything that happens in the family they've married into. They just need to listen more and talk less.
I'm not suggesting that they be sidelined or that they are not part of the family. But this family has deep-seated that stem from before the two joined the family. They need to break things down and get to the core of their problems without the two giving their opinions on the matter. For example Jennifer just threw in the fact that Zwai did not attend the white wedding, her intentions were not constructive and provided no aid to the problems discussed.
Mr Jafta and Jen are part of the family, however, healing requires breaking down layers and having them present makes it difficult to achieve that.
Zwai is giving me after 9 men vibes
Haiboo😅😅😅
No ways. Zwai is an alpha male. Very close to being toxic too but high testosterone is like that. As long as he controls it or else Zwai is indoda NDO!!!!! Others could learn
Sggv
Kk
Beautiful family.