Too Much TV, Enneagram Type 9
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- In this video, we explore how Enneagram Type 9 personalities can balance their love for TV with personal growth, goals, and connections. #enneagramcoaching #personalgrowth #goals #connections
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Dr. Tom LaHue is a graduate of Florida Christian College. He holds 3 Master's Degrees including an MDiv from Liberty Univ. His Doctoral degree is from Grace College and Seminary. He is also a certified Marriage Coach. He and his wife Traci have been married since 1991. They are the proud parents of 5 children and 5 grandchildren.
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But Dr. Tom, binging enneagram videos is just SO much more interesting and educational than the poorly written soap opera of the "real" world.
That's the beauty of diving deep into the world of Enneagram! It offers insights and growth that can be truly captivating.
I so needed to hear this. I'm a 9w1 with mild ADHD (I wonder what the correlation is with 9s and neurodiversity - has anyone ever studied this?) but find I can spend HOURS scrolling/falling down YT rabbit holes. I know so much about useless information I'll never use in my life, but have a to-do list as long as my arm. But the pull towards numbing out is so strong! It's a real example of sloth, of not being awake to my own life. Thanks for the reminder to try and live life more fully...
Ah, the infamous RUclips rabbit holes! They have a way of pulling us in, don't they? Maybe we should start a support group for those of us who get lost in them.
One of my personal challenges right now (9w1) is even though I'm doing a lot of things with my friends, my brain never feels like it's enough. Just this week, I attended two dance classes, a board game night with one set of friends, two get-togethers with other friends, and two date nights. And yet, as soon as I have a free day, my brain goes, "Why don't I ever do anything with people? Why am I alone all the time?" And I have no idea how to point my brain toward ALL THE THINGS I JUST DID with other people in a way that will let it accept that I do, in fact, do things with other people and I don't have to feel lonely.
It's tough when our minds play tricks on us like that. Remember to acknowledge all the fun times you've had with friends, even if your brain tries to convince you otherwise.
On a much deeper and neurotic level, it may come to the personality that YOU didn't do anything, because YOU were living life for others. Sure, you had tons of fun and brought the sunshine/spice of life to the party, bringing in that peaceful energy to boot, but what did YOU do personally for yourself? Did you... speak up where you were disappointed with something? Did you speak up for what you may have really wanted? Was anger ever allowed to be expressed? Did you really feel inside yourself, in the body, and connect to that energetic energy, etc. These types of questions may allude you to an answer that resonates more closely than I could ever do here by guessing. Also, speaking about being alone, 9's (generally) love the "alone" time; so if your brain doesn't feel like it was enough, I just encourage you to explore the 7 (ego-planning) with then chasing that constant high, and social time; to organize with friends. Unless you really resonate with the 9, then this may be in the defense (stress) point of 6, with the what-ifs, or perhaps the heart point at 3 with creating goals for yourself :D; regardless, you can see if being socially out there is coming from anxiety as an escape from yourself (like the tv) and living through others as more important (getting straight to the point here) or is it more goal-oriented with being seen by others and taking claim in the spotlight. Again - these are only suggestions as I don't know you, but from the words you've used this would be my initial inkling. Best of all endeavors in this journey my friend!
@@Tousicle I'm a social 9. (Counterype for the 9.) Also #1 Communication in the Clifton Strengths framework. I like having a comfortable, quiet home, but also need a lot of people-time and socializing.
@@juliegolick Hey, excellent! I'm also a social 9 (with my passion showing up heavily in the self-preserve as well; again they all work synonymously) isn't it fun being a social 9 haha; idk about you, but I lean heavily on my 8 (my twin bro is an 8), but also have a good balance on 1. Do you find that sometimes we (as social 9s), as it could be said, don't actively seek social engagements but are always ready for the call? :p
@@Tousicle Oh, no, I definitely seek them out lol. During the pandemic lockdowns I found that I needed to have at least one videochat a day or I'd go to a dark mental place. (I live alone, no pets, and wasn't bubbling with anyone.) That said, I'm also #1 Communication in the Clifton Strengths framework, so I need a lot of social engagement and external processing time. On the other hand, I prefer smaller social engagements (where I can talk to everyone and follow all the conversations) rather than really large ones -say, a dinner party compared to a house party.
I really needed to hear this. I've been letting some important friendships slip lately, thank you for reminding me to hold on to them. Gonna go call them up now!
You got this!
I call my binge scrolling, “getting lost in the sauce!”
That's funny.
"Sorry boss/honey, but someone was wrong on the internet!"
Thanks for this Dr. Tom! Your last Type 9 video really lit a fire under me. I've deleted all social media (besides YT) AND removed the app here. So I'm forced to actually pull up the website & login if/when I want to watch stuff. I've also enrolled in grad school & gotten sober. I think the biggest thing for Type 9s is just committing to something, anything. Not necessarily big changes or all at once. But I've noticed that once I make the decision it's actually pretty easy to plan out & follow through.
*You got this fellow 9ers!* 💪
That's awesome to hear! Keep pushing forward and remember, small steps lead to big changes. You're doing amazing!
I find it very difficult to do things to a moderate extend and tend to get lost in activities very easily. It’s actually weird because there is a point when it doesn’t feel good anymore but I feel like I can’t stop nevertheless. Then I have days where I think „I need to get my shit together!“ and I just focus on what I should do - what can weirdly feel like a relief, like breaking free of compulsive habits that don’t fulfill me anyway. I just don’t know why it is so hard to stay in that mode, despite the fact that it makes me feel much better. Sometimes I feel like I‘m so prone to getting lost in things or to overdo them, that it’s easier to avoid them completely.
It's common to struggle with finding a balance in how we approach tasks. Recognizing the pattern is a great step towards making positive changes.
Right there with you -and it doesn't even have to be mindless entertainment. It could be reading good books or even doing something creative or journaling (granted, I do all these things on the computer because of severe issues with hand function). It all has a shelf life ('good' activities longer than 'time wasters'). After that it feels lifeless and even draining but I often still get stuck. If you feel comfortable sharing, do you have ADHD or similar? I don't as far as I know, but you've described my difficulties with shifting to a T! Also have such difficulty with staying in middle ground, or maybe with recognizing I'm there....
Is it possible to watch too many Enneagram type 9 videos 😉
Thank you for watching so many of my Enneagram type 9 videos, your support means a lot!
I find that taking media fasts has been so helpful. I've done it for Lent but also if I'm in a particularly busy season where I have a lot to accomplish and can't afford to be distracted by media. I've deleted social media apps off my phone for short time periods or put timers on my apps to make sure I'm not spending too much time on them.
It's awesome to hear that media fasts have been beneficial for you! Sometimes a break from distractions really helps us refocus and get things done. Keep it up!
Assassin's Creed Pt. 14 "The Musical"?! Sign me up! 😂
Right...
9w1- I do unashamedly love movies and shows, but I also spent a lot of time doing art, singing in 2 choirs, exploring new places and so much more. I have often felt relatively balanced about it... until March of this year when I got a new job. Ever since, I hardly do art and instead of working on my creative entrepreneurial goals, I have been finding myself spending so much time watching tv...I used to at least watch tv AND do art, but sometimes I just look across the room at my art table and think "Whatever...what's the point. I'll do it tomorrow." But then I don't. So I think I am definitely off balance in the movie/show department right now.
Finding the right balance can be tricky, especially with a new job. It's important to make time for your creative pursuits!
Unfortunately this is one of my biggest challenges - I’m a 9w1 and so I have no problem leaning on that 1w to get stuff done, but I absolutely use TV and social media as a substitute for genuine connections and relationships. I love what you said about that taking intentionality to cultivate - as a natural isolator, that can feel a bit scary too. But I can sense that my life feels less happy and fulfilled as a result - soooo hard to combat that contented sloth sin!!
It's great that you're aware of this challenge and are taking steps to combat it!
I would start small by either tracking screen time, setting timers to only use it during certain points of the day, or even just delete an app or 2. Obviously not all of those at once, but just pick what works for you and give it a try. I mentioned on another comment I've deleted all socials except here. Gotta day, quality of life is way better. Instead of scrolling some media, I try to work on a language app or catch up on emails. It's a small change but helps me feel more productive.
This is reeeeaallllyyyy hard when I have important uni deadlines creeping up... 🙈 I think the subconscious anxiety surrounding this makes it even worse and more tempting to try and 'escape' from it and procrastinate as a result!!
When you find yourself cleaning your room instead of working on your assignment, you know the procrastination game is strong!
When I was in grad school, my dorm room never looked so clean as when I had term papers due! 🤣
Hahaha this is so true, guilty as charged!! 😆🙌 although, I justify it as having a clean and tidy environment to work in helps my brain 🧠....
Yesssss....this is ME. Type 9 1 wing ... unfortunately it is my hobby. I work full time, I work out every day....and then I am glued to screens. :////
It's great to hear that you resonate with the content! Finding a balance between work, fitness, and screen time can be a challenge.
Omg Tom! Spot on for the 9 in my life!!!!!!
Thank you for your kind words, it means a lot!
Oof as an 9w1 with severe ADHD (increased due to health issues) I can relate big time. Videos on YT are like a IV-Drip of Dopamine. But I found out that you can substitute a lot with Radio. And it doesn't suck you in as much.
It's great to hear that you're finding alternatives that work for you! Balancing our media consumption is so important, especially when navigating ADHD.
I don't know what it's like to get hit by cluster munitions, but that opening salvo is pretty comparable😹
Well, let's hope my video doesn't cause collateral damage!
ATTORNEY GENERAL has a social media warning now in CA
Yikes, I had no idea.
I think you mean the Surgeon General.
“Media time drunkenness”
Hey, thanks for dropping a comment! Keep enjoying the content and stay tuned for more fun videos!
1-3 hours of media time daily 😅
Whoops, I think I've exceeded that limit a few times!
Guilty
I appreciate your engagement on my channel!