Grieving the Loss of a Cat
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- Опубликовано: 11 фев 2025
- Since losing Miss Mina almost a month ago, I've really struggled with my own grief. I've found several resources to be helpful, so I'm putting the links below.
My book review of When a Pet Dies by Fred Rogers:
• Book Review: When a Pe...
Wallace Sife - The Loss of a Pet:
www.google.com...
The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement:
www.aplb.org/
(note: I found the chat rooms here highly valuable)
Julia Samuel - Grief Counselor:
juliasamuel.co...
I also highly recommend these videos featuring Julia:
• Julia Samuel on grief,...
• How To MOVE ON, LET GO...
I'm Tom Kirby, UW-AAB, LSHC-S and I'm a certified animal behavior consultant who specializes in cats. At Kitty Help Desk, I offer affordable, science-based, judgement-free, feline behavior consults.
DISCLAIMER: This video is provided for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for a one-on-one consultation with an animal behavior consultant or a veterinarian.
All products shown or mentioned in this video were purchased at retail. I prefer not to do paid reviews or product placements. My opinions are my own.
WEB: kittyhelpdesk.com
INSTAGRAM: / kittyhelpdesk
FACEBOOK: / kittyhelpdesk
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Video content by Tom Kirby, UW-AAB, LSHC-S
Original music by Tom Kirby
Modeling by Miss Lucy and Miss Mina
Please comment responsibly. The best comments contribute to the discussion and help us all. Disrespectful comments will be deleted and quickly forgotten.
Just lost my cat yesterday. The pain is real, I can't stop crying.
I'm so sorry. Please try to take care of yourself and know that there are those of us who understand and share your pain.
I lost my cat at 17 yrs old Thursday. I am jus completely depressed. He slept with me since he was a newborn. And now jus gone.
Mine passed last week
I know how you feel!!!❤❤❤❤
The pain is immeasurablely intense 😭😭😭
My hubby and I just lost our cat, Chandler M. Bing, this past Thursday February, 6th, 2025. He was 9 years old and his kidneys just suddenly failed. He was the best boy ever and he loved and was loved. My 1st cat and my hubby’s 7th. Named him after Matthew Perry’s Friends character. I couldn’t get outta bed the other day for a long while, his collar in my hands. I only got up to use the bathroom. His dog brother and feline sister kept sniffing his body before we took him to be cremated. Then for 2 days, they kept searching for him. He took a bit of all of us when he passed. I can’t stop crying. My heart has been the heaviest it’s ever been. I’ve caught myself saying, “My boy!” Under my breath quite often since he left.
I thank you so much for this video and I am so sorry for your loss.Last Friday I had to put down my sweet fur baby cat of 16 years old from kidney disease. What is unbearable is the pain and the silence. To help the grieving process the day that he passed away, I made 2 memorials in his name in my home. One was where his litter box was placed and the other where he had his food. The memorials include photos, his paw print and his toys. I could not have accepted these to places to be just an empty space in my household. I miss him so much but the memories of him will live on. Every new day will be a challenge, and what is comforting to me is that he has crossed over the Rainbow Bridge and he is now in peace and with no more pain.🌈❤️
I'm sorry for your loss. Please remember that the effects he had on you during his life will always remain.
Truth is we never comprehend how much we really love them until they're deceased. And no amount of mental preparation will get us ready for the final goodbye. Lastly, whether the cat lives to be 15, 20, or 25 years old, losing them will always be too soon. God knows how much I miss my flame point Himalayan dude.
My beautiful cat died in an accident 4 days ago was only 4. Worse, I was out of the country when it happened, and I'm waiting to just get home to him. My heart...he showed me I love very deeply. I'm so sad right now 💔😢
@@clarahopkins5182hey Clara. I hope you got to see your cat. My cat passed away on 14th Jan 2025, it was a freak accident. She was going to be 7 in April. She fell down 7 floors and I could not save her. I know what you are going through. Pls take care. I just can't take my mind off.
I've had a lot of cats over the years. Most of them shelter cats, ageing between 5 and 10 years when I got them.
When they come to the end of their natural life, I have always followed them during their last moments. Usually holding them in my arms.
The first time was the worst, but it's always terrible watching them take the last breath. 😥
I know how you must feel.
Yes, I've read that many caregivers don't want to be there in their pet's final moments and I don't understand it. I held mina in my arms and her last act was to look into my eyes and give me the slow blink to let me know she was ready. I will always miss her.
You are a lovely Dr. Sending you ❤ too
@@BersekViking you sound lovely
@KittyHelpDesk I let Sooty also died in my arms. First time but best so natural. Vet reported me to RSPCA for animal cruelty i explained and they still WANT TO PROSECUTE ME BECAYSE I WOULDnt LET THE VET Have him put DOWN. SO I HAD TO RUN OUT THE BACK DOOR AS WE WERE NOT READY TO SAY GOODBYE WITH ONE MINUTES NOTICE AS ThEY WERE CLOSING AND I DIDNT HAVE 170 POUNDS IN MY PURSE. SO WE CAME HOME AND HE DIED PEACEFULLY 5 HOURS LATER WITH BiRD CHIRPING MUSIC FROM YOU TUBE. WHY DONT rspca get their priorities right and prosecute true people who neglect or abuse animals. Couldn't believe it. The nasty vet has been taken over a big company that is just money grabbing. Medivet, please don't use them. A truly terrible day and experience. It pains my ❤️
lost my 9year old cat 2hours ago.was diagnosed with Fib.He was born in my hands and he died on my hands.i ll never forget you my boy❤
I'm so sorry to hear that. Please take care of yourself.
@@KittyHelpDesk thank you so much,time is the greatest healer
I hate life because of death. My cat is dying and after the shock and crying now I am having panic attacks and can't breathe. She is hiding somewhere behind some furniture but I know she is dying. My heart is broken. I don't want her to die. I call her mama because ever since my mom died, I started calling her mama. :(
I'm sorry you're going through that. I hope you'll take the time you need to experience your grief and allow it to become a part of you.
My heart goes out to you. I lost 2 of my cats this morning. ❤❤
My beautiful 18 year old Lily passed 2 weeks ago and I am inconsolable 😢. I want to switch my feelings to gratitude for having her in my life for so long. I feel like I'll never get there. So broken.
It does feel like it will never end, and it some ways it won't. It just becomes a part of us. Don't push for too much from yourself too soon and remember to take care of yourself.
@ thanks. I'm a mess right now.
I feel with you, I had to put down my sweet fur baby cat of 16 years old last Friday from kidney disease. I am so lost and everything is so silent without him. We have to keep repeating to ourselves that they are now in peace and have no more pain and that they have crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. But it is us that are suffering so much. There are beautiful videos of the Rainbow Bridge on you tube that I watch that I find helpful. The emptiness is still there and every new day is a challenge. My thoughts are with you.🌈❤️
Thank you so much for this. I lost my kitty last week. And I cry every day. And I know that it is affected my other cat and my dog. We are all grieving.
My sweet Simone was 20 when I had to help her cross the Rainbow Bridge. I will never, ever get over it. I now have two wonderful littermate boys whom I love dearly, but Simone was my soulmate.
I just lost my Sooty cat 2 hours ago..he died un my arms..feel numb as I loved him so much ❤
I'm so sorry. I hope you'll remember to care for yourself and take the time you need to adapt to this big change while remembering the good times as well.
@KittyHelpDesk thank you so much ❤️
I am sorry for your loss. I, said goodbye to my 8 yr old orange kitty, Otie Jan 10th from GI Lymphoma, and although I have had to many kitties in my life and two younger kitties at home, my heart and home are both so empty and the tears frankly don't want to stop. Prayers for your healing, may our kitties still be with us and now healthy and young once again.
Thanks so much
I am sorry for your loss of Miss Mina. I lost my 8 yr old kitty, Otie, on January 10th, sadly we had only 5 years with this sweetie, not enough time. Heart shattered, house empty and although we still have two younger kitties in the home, they are not as connected to my spirit as Otie. It literally is one day at a time right now. Prayers for your healing, may all our kitties who are crossed onto the other side be happy, healthy and still with us.
Hi, I lost my 9 year Persian cat on 27 Dec 24. I am still grieving a lot. I was going to get 2 new Persians, but it fell through. I have moved back 100 steps in grieving. We don't always understand what's up, but I'm lost from a bit of sunshine, into darkness again. There will never ever be a cat lime Clarise again. She will also never be replaceable. Clarise was my love story.
Don't rush. That I've learnt now. Slowly slowly.
I just lost my sweet boy today of 14 years. Absolutely devastated, my heart hurts... Thank you for sharing this video.
My cat was 14 yrs old too. He passed away yesterday 😭
Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words. I've lost my beloved Abyssinian Dylan at the age of 11 to lymphoma. Dylan was so much a part of me, all day every day, as I work from home. My little soulmate. His absence is hitting me hard and there is a huge void now that can not be filled. I look in every part of the house and he is not there. He was my teddy bear in bed, my company wherever I was in the house. I've never been impacted by the loss of a cat the way I have been with Dylan. There well never be another Dylan.
Thank you for this video. My husband and I lost our beautiful orange tabby cat, Peaches on Monday. She was our youngest kitty. She was 5 years old. She was bonded with our other rescue cat, Tiger. Thankfully, our older cat, Pumpkin has been comforting Tiger. Peaches had cancer. She lost half of her weight in two weeks. She was hiding and we noticed she wasn't. acting like herself. We are devastated. It's been a traumatic year. My father in law passed away in July. My husband of almost 28 years got very ill and almost passed away in January 2024. I appreciate your advice and help with books to deal with Peaches passing. She was a wonderful family member. She helped me get through Vivid teaching online in 2020. My students loved seeing her on my computer. She was such a joy.
I'm so sorry. I hope you will find ways to live with these losses by embracing both your human and your feline family members.
So sorry for your loss and pain. Kisses to sweet Lucy. ❤️🌈
I just lost my absolute best friend ever . Constantly by my side for the last 16 years. I’m devastated 😭😭😭😭. Thank you for sharing your experience and the book recommendations.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope that your friend had a wonderful life.
I lost my rescued kitty who was just 6 years old. I was not prepared at all because she was so young, I think we never will be able to be prepared no matter what. It was a freak accident she fell down 7 floors and passed away within an hour due to the fall. I miss her every moment , I see her everywhere, I miss holding her, I cannot stop blaming myself for what happened, I can't stop thinking that I would have saved her. She is now gone forever. So I know what you are going through. Hugs to you ❤
I'm so sorry. I hope you remember to take care of yourself.
Just lost our family cat of 17 years, she died unexpectedly in her sleep last night. I never got to say goodbye, which is very hard for me to deal with right now, can't stop crying. First time dealing with this level of grief, thank you for making a video like this and sharing your story with us.
I'm so sorry to hear that you lost your dear friend. Please take care of yourself.
@@KittyHelpDesk Thank you so much:')
I found dealing with my loss of a few Cats I had was very difficult for me,as they are very loving animals and have their own personalities. I still deal with the grief as it is like waves in the ocean that ebbs and flows but actually never goes away. Thank you.
Lost my little Cleo 5 months ago to heart attack related to her kidney disease. She was 16. I am a grown man 42 yrs old and have been in a daze since then. I haven't been able to look at a photo of her since, I seem to have blocked out the pain. I'm not doing great. Hope everyone gets better
I'm so sorry. It's important that you feel the pain, express it, and accept it into your life. For most, it becomes a permanent part of us, though the edge will dull with time. I wish you all the best.
I lost my 22 year old Russian Blue 10 days ago. Though I knew it was coming for two years due to age and kidney issues, nothing could have prepared me for this pain. I'm just thankful he went peacefully and that I was there until his last breath. But this house feels miserable without him. My remaining cat is a grieving mess. It's painful to watch. Rest in Peace my man. 💔💔💔
I'm very sorry. Please remember to take care of yourself.
@@KittyHelpDeskthank you. I'm trying. Very difficult in the situation I'm in. My cat alerted me to seizures. Unbelievable. I'm very sorry for your loss. Thank you for this video. Time absolutely does not heal all wounds. My daughter would be 30 today. But I buried her 29 and a half years ago. So I know that no, that little societal saying is simply not true. Bless you for reaching out to comfort people. The world needs more of this.
It's cool how lucy hang's out. I sometimes think something is wrong with me grieving my 18 year old cat for over a month now it is very difficult but this help's Thank you
There's nothing wrong with you. You've lost a close companion. I still grieve Mina and it's been almost 10 months. I expect these feelings will be with us to some degree for life, but I've also noticed more moments of gratitude along the way.
I had to put down my sweet cat of 16 years old last Friday from kidney disease. I feel with you, I am having such a hard time coping with the emotions and the silence. Ever day is a new challenge, we somehow have to let the memories of them comfort us and try to understand that they are in peace now and have no more pain. They have crossed over the Rainbow Bridge.🌈❤️
I gave my little tiger a kiss, rubbed his back, and told him to be good as I opened the door. That was the last time I held and spoke to him. Fourteen wonderful years. He was fast, but the coyote was faster.
We lost our baby boy Jimmy last week. Only 1 year old and his brother is lost without him. We're heartbroken 💔 sending love to everyone going through this 😢❤
I'm so sorry. Please remember to take good care of yourself and Jimmy's brother so you can support each other at this difficult time.
On October 29th I had to say goodbye to my beloved cat Frisky. It was very stressful and painful. He will be sadly missed because He was such a sweet cat.
I'm so sorry to hear that. Please remember to take care of yourself.
My boy of 3 months who I only had for only a month ran outside 4 days ago, I suffer with depression and anxiety and for the first time i would wake up every day with hope the second I hear his good morning meow and he was with me from morning till I go to sleep..I've looked everywhere and can't find my child, everyday is filled with so much loss because I don't know what happened to him..I'm trying to keep hope but I burst out in tears everytime I look to see him not next to me or cuddling up to me...the loss feels like a black hole in my heart😢...
If you think he's still around, try putting his soiled litter box outside to help him find his way home. I recently worked with a family whose cat ran out and was gone for three weeks before they found her. Don't give up yet!
@KittyHelpDesk I put his favorite food outside and his litter and I'm praying every morning when I wake up he'll be with me again....I won't give up,but it hurts to not know where my baby is and what his condition is😭
I understand. Hang in there and keep looking. Most cats who run outside end up staying pretty close to home.
@@KittyHelpDeskI'm in utter agony, I will never give up, as much the pain is felt every second he is gone...my heart tells me that my child will return....I pray every second and I'm looking outside every 5 minutes calling him with his favorites treaties,he is truly my heart❤️😭
My family had to give up most of out cats, so they could have a better life with people who actually had money, unlike us. I process emotions weirdly because im neurodivergent, and its been a few weeks, but its really getting to me now. I look at the remainder of kittens we were able to keep, and i love them, but i cry for their moms who we had to let go of. I dont think ill ever get over them because i saw them grow up, literally since birth. I dont want to let go, i want to feel happy and remember them beautifuly, but all I feel right now is guilt. I love them so much. I want to hug them and let them know theyre safe. Thankfully the moms arent dead, but they just have new homes, and i miss them with all if my heart. My heart is melted thinking of them.
I lost harpie on November 20th of last year we used to bond and do everything together not only was she a fun loving cat but she was my best friend I love her and I miss her very much
I'm so sorry to hear that. Please take care of yourself and continue to reach out to others who you know will understand.
I’m so very sorry.. I had my soul kitty for 16 years. I adopted him from the shelter when he was guesstimated as 3. I’ve had a bunch of cats and dogs (and a bunny) during my life & there was nothing I wouldn’t do for them, I loved them all so much. But my cat Buddha was just over the top because we went through a lot together. I lost my sister & my Dad during our time together & he was with me in a way no human could be. He was diagnosed with diabetes about 3 years ago and for most of that time he did well on his insulin & had a great quality of life. But the last 6 months or so he just kept declining - once he completely stopped eating I knew it was time. I cried for 3 days straight knowing I had to do it for him but struggling with it at the same time. I felt like I was killing him and it was so heartbreaking.. My vet who I was with for years, she made it so comfortable for him, and for me- with lots of time, soft music, and dimmed lights to calm him. We all cried together. He passed peacefully with me holding him and talking to him the whole way. It was January 29th of this year. I still cry a lot and I miss his presence and his snores and snuggles and the way he used to look at me and listen to me when I’d tell him about my day at work, & so many other things about him. I’m so grateful and lucky that he was (and will always be) a part of me. A few weeks ago I adopted a 10 year old boy from the shelter whose parent sadly passed. I went there to spend some time with the cats & dogs to help my sadness… I saw him and brought him home for a “sleepover”. Ended up adopting ❤ I think Buddha sent him to me so I could help him and he could help me.
I wish you peace and comfort… 💞
My sincere sympathies for the loss of Buddha. I love all cats, but there are always those special ones who touch you in some way. I can't even put it into words. May your Buddha continue to inspire kindness in your heart.
Thank you for the wonderful video. I lost my 2 cats in the space of 4 days. Both developed the same stomach tumour. Literally back from the vets 1 hour. Just cannot believe they're both gone. One was the Mother and the other was the son. Amazing animals. Only 11 and 12 years. My cat family wiped out in the space of 4 days. Absolutely gutted.
I'm so sorry that you're going through that. Please remember to take care of yourself.
@velcrokittie this is heart breaking pls take care of yourself. I lost my rescued kitty who was just 6 years old. I was not prepared at all because she was so young, I think we never will be able to be prepared no matter what. It was a freak accident she fell down 7 floors and passed away within an hour due to the fall. I miss her every moment , I see her everywhere, I miss holding her, I cannot stop blaming myself for what happened, I can't stop thinking that I would have saved her. She is now gone forever. So I know what you are going through. Hugs to you ❤
What a beautiful baby, Lucy! How loving. I just put my baby girl Autumn to sleep a week ago today. Miss her greatly and having a tough time. Thank You for this video, it does help knowing there are people who love and bond with animals like I do and how much they are missed when gone. Prayers to you and Lucy.
I'm so sorry. It truly is one of the most difficult things I've faced. Wishing you all the best.
Again, so incredibly sorry to hear about your loss. It's good to see you have again.
Thank you!
❤😢your cat looks the image of my cat who passed away two weeks ago he was 17 years old toby,,,,😊
Wow this is the best video on the subject I’ve found. Needs more traffic as was very helpful for me. Thank you
I'm glad you found it helpful. Please take care of yourself.
Happy to see you again. Be kind to yourself.
Thank you!
I recommend "The Fall of Freddie the Leaf: A Story of Life for all ages" by Leo Buscaglia. 💚
Thank you, I'll check it out.
My beautiful Russian Blue cat was euthanised last week Kidney disease she had.
15 years my best friend
Feels like half my heart is ripped out.
Thankyou for this video
👍🐈
I'm sorry to hear that. Please take care of yourself.