We had a pool party for our youth group. It was expected of me and all the girls to wear full swim suits, and be modest. But the boys were allowed to wear just shorts. I'm a girl, I have hormones too. When I was going to be baptised my pastors told me to wear modest swim clothes and maybe a shirt over the top. I kept on thinking about how no one told the boys at the pool party to put a shirt on. Girls are visual too. If girls need to be mindful of what they wear then why don't boys? if you have crush on someone you going to be attracted to them no matter what they wear.
I totally agree! Another thing that I think could be potentially harmful with the "because men are physical/lustful/visual, etc." reasoning is that it tends to send a message to both women and men about a man's ability to have self control and maintain purity within themselves. It just kind of sets men up to think that they're victims to their mindsets/biology and can't do anything about it, and that's just not true. If their thoughts are sinful/lustful/impure (which also doesn't even apply to all men), God can still work in them to deliver them from that. Sometimes that message in itself can cause a stumbling block to men and their belief in their ability to combat these supposed "natural/inevitable" tendencies.
Mia Foster perfectly said. and honestly, in today's world where images and videos (some that are not so God-honoring) are just a click away, everyone's pretty visual, not just men. I'm sure it's true that men are naturally more visual, but women are too now. no ones really safe from the temptation. but you see all the time young girls and women fantasizing about celebrity men and stuff like that and it's just as much lust as it would be for a man. so I think that when we get the "modesty/lust talk," it shouldn't be: girls, dress modestly. guys, don't lust. girls and boys should be working on modesty and lust issues.
As a Christian Guy, I can agree with this. It almost feels like girls are taught to be ashamed of their bodies because a guy might stumble. When it comes down to the reality of it all it is that guys responsibility to lean on his relationship with God and make a personal decision not to fall into sin. I am not saying that as a Christian guy I never sin because that would be untrue. I do believe that it is an everyday journey for us to work toward being more Christ-like.
As a Muslim woman, we are also told that this is the main reason. It makes no sense. Especially when our holy book, the Qur'an, it instructs men first to "Lower your gaze". That tells me that the responsibility is on them first.
I dress "classy" mainly because this body is not my own. My body is a temple of Christ and he gave his life down for me. So I honor him with what I wear.
I dress as a woman of class and dignity as a means to honor God. Me come s second, guys third. I believe in laying my body down as a living sacrifice so I don't mind making a small sacrifice in covering up more to be pleasing to God. Great video.
I am not a Christian but I absolutely love your perspective on this. I grew up Christian and was always told that my body was too distracting for men and it made me feel dirty and like my body didn't belong to me. It was a factor that drove me away from religion along with others. But it is so refreshing to hear this thought and it seems to be picking up popularity among Christian women and I am so happy to hear it. Thank you for sharing this!
Side note to many girls watching this: you don't HAVE to dress classy in the sense of dresses, jewelry, and fancy shoes everyday. I am a tomboy. I love street-style clothes. I hate dresses. And that is PERFECTLY okay. There's absolutely nothing wrong with sneakers, t-shirts, ripped jeans, and no jewelry. God loves you for YOU, not for the clothes you wear, darling. Women of God don't all fit into one shape or size, nor do they fit into one style or wardrobe. BE YOU & BE LOVED.
“I have adopted the idea that in my life that there are two parallel lines and one is the amount of skin I show and one is the amount of power I have, and they are not ever ever things that intersect." Soooo gooood!
SUBSCRIBE! : bit.ly/2rx7crK Follow my IG: instagram.com/emwilss DISCLAIMER : I do believe that the women who I heard speak had good intentions. I just think the mark has really been missed on empowering women to dress with class and dignity for reasons that are strengthening and uplifting. And I want to change that.
We also do a great disservice to men painting them as animals who cannot control their thoughts or actions. Men do not all have the same thoughts or reactions, and some men find immodest women unattractive. I agree the whole narrative needs to change.
Whoa, that just clicked something in my mind! I've been approaching modesty the same way you used to ("Would this outfit cause my brothers to stumble?") and have been having a hard time figuring it out and staying passionate about it -- aiming to dress with clas and dignity is a much more clear and attainable goal!! Thank you!!!!!
I completely agree with you! And honestly, a man could have lustful thoughts about you even when you're dressed modestly, which is his problem. As long as I do my part in dressing classy, I don't concern myself being a temptation to someone. I also think that God created us as beautiful women and it is good for the world to see that.
Thank you, Emily! :) It's for this very reason I can't stand the popular phrase “modest is hottest.” I don’t choose to dress modestly because I think it’ll attract more guys or because I’m ashamed of my body. I choose to dress modestly because it makes me feel comfortable and beautiful - not “hot,” beautiful.
*Claps* 👏👏👏 That being the first reason causes such imbalanced thinking. It should be about reflecting your own Christ-like character, and reflecting that you're trying to be the Lady that God wants you to be. It's like someone being on a diet, and expecting all their friends to all be on the same diet with them.. when they are the only one with a weight issue. Your friends can be supportive, but it's not their responsibility in life to get you healthy again, they can only love you along the way. Love the point you made.
I also always try to explain to my brothers in Christ that women struggle with lust too. We don't talk about it as much, but one in three CHRISTIAN women struggle with pornography. I love dressing modestly because I care about them and I always ask them to do the same for me. Especially at church camp settings, etc: If I'm wearing a one piece or even a t-shirt in the hot sun, can you at least keep your shirt on? I think we need to start opening this conversation and include men and boys in the modesty talks too.
I completely agree with you on this! So I was raised by a graceful, classy, dignified Mother & in Catholic schools etc & literally never heard specifically woman should dress "modestly." I always associated that word with Jehovia's Witnesses, the Amish & strict Muslim women: women covered from head to toe as not to send the lustful men into sin. This sounded crazy and archaic to me. I was raised that you should dress "appropriately" for your age/occasion etc and with class & dignity because you were made in the image of God.
The first thing, really and truly, that you should ask yourself concerning your clothing is: Does this honor God. Not for yourself, not for guys, for God.
Awesome!! I have also heard these types of talks and also think it's crazy how we should do it for men. We should dress with dignity because our body deserves to be respected.
I 100% agree with what you had to say on this topic and I LOVE LOVE LOVE that you used Kate Middleton as the example. She and Audrey Hepburn are my style icons and you are right, they dress/dressed with beauty, pose, grace and CLASS. And you explained it perfectly. I wish more women would state this along with saving sex for marriage or acting in general in a way that glorifies the Lord. It shouldn't be about the guys (or women sometimes), all we say, do and wear should reflect that we are daughters of the Most High King...so we are Princesses. ;)
Many people say "my body belongs to me" just like you said. But i think that my body belongs to God and i have to praise God with this body and not disrespect God with imodest clothes. My first reason to wear modest clothes is because my body belongs to God and not to me.
AMEN! I feel my insides crawling when I hear some of these modesty talks! It's usually skewed biblical principals that feel so oppressive as it's being taught. The fruit of the Spirit is SELF CONTROL. I can only do my part to control myself. Modesty is mostly an issue of the heart. You can dress "modestly" and be a show-off of your money or accomplishments.
Thank you!! Someone that finaly said it all! I went threw depression once in my life because of ppl telling me to dress so modesty, I hate dresses and because ppl telling me that I had to cover everything with dresses and stuff like that I got scared of what they told me cause they said if I don't dress like what they wanted then I would go to hell, so I started wearing dresses all the way to my feet and had a head covering every where I was, home and out, plus not wearing makeup! I got so depressed, I didn't feel beautiful anymore and I cried every single day, and my friends and family kept asking me if I was ok and that I was not myself anymore. and then a verse kept popping in my head 1 Samuel 16:7 and I believe that God kept putting that verse in my head, then I started dressing back to my normal self and started being myself again and I felt so much better, I litterly stay closer to God being myself. Then I had a dream threw my harsh depression that I was in a dark room crying so bad & then a light shined down from heaven & God picked me up with his hand & he made me feel a amazing love that is unexplainable, & he spoke to me and said, my daughter Estera what ever you ask you shall receive, & that love and comfort that he gave me was amazing! & ever sense then I have been myself and getting more and more closer to God, Jesus has never left my side threw the good and bad. 🙂
I'm not a religious person by any means, but I can understand why people practice what they want! I admire how you stay true to yourself and how you are very current! I respect that!
Kate Middleton also has the added pressure of representing the Royal Family of the UK, and it's expected of her to dress a certain way to fit the professional role she has within the family she married into. There is an expectation to not bring shame or scandal on the family. Most of the pressure comes from the Queen herself, although the family still has had it's scandals.
FINALLY, SOMEONE SAID IT. I always hated that in churches I was told that it was MY fault that guys could not control themselves. I remember those church trips where the boys would be allowed to be shirtless going to the pool and the girls would be told to cover up as not to tempt the boys. Everyone should cover up if that be the case. The double standard always irritated me.
Great point. As a Pastor I've seen so many versions of this misguided and/or incomplete logic. That which we choose to do, we must do for God and ourselves, and we will then influence those around correctly.
I'm really glad you brought this up. However, one thing is that our body is not ours, it is God's. I think the first reason we dress, actually the first reason we do anything, should not be for ourselves, but for God.
You're absolutely right Emily! Another favorite Christian youtuber of mine that explains this subject so well is Katie Gregoire. Dressing modestly is about the inherent beauty and love that God vested upon us.
Hi Emily, I COMPLETELY agree with your main point!! Once when my bible study group and I went on a beach camp, our leader gave each of us GIRLS letters telling us what to wear and what not to wear while at the beach. And their reasons were because GUYS were going to look at us and get sinful thoughts because some of them 'struggled with porn problems.' This made me quite mad, especially because the girls got letters and did the guys? NOPE. None of us girls were going to be scantily clad anyway.....
Yeah that is not very fair but my youth group had a pool party and their rule was no bikinis for the girls, if you were wearing one you had to put a t-shirt on, and all the guys had to wear t-shirts! So I thought that was a good rule! I kinda wish that was a rule everywhere. ~Rockfeather
I absolutely adored you're video, I'm not Christian. But I dress modestly, I cover everything but my hands, face and ankles and sometimes my neck. I hate the thought that women should cover for men. Cover for yourself and you're faith. Modest dress has brought me so much closer to the Gods. So much deeper into my faith. I never look at clothes or at myself and say "will this turn a guy on?" No. I don't dress for men. I dress for myself, and above all my faith.
Thank you for this! The only thing I would add is that above dressing for ourselves, we should dress for one man: for Christ Himself. If He incarnated Himself for the sole purpose to die for my sins, faults, and mistakes, then I, His daughter and His beloved, can reflect the beauty and class of that love in the way I dress, act, and am. Modesty is a disposition in the heart, not an endless set of rules. Because of this, I will dress to be a reflection of His love for me, even if it means sacrificing that "cute top". So yes, dress with the class, dignity, and beauty that you are--because it is who you are!--but above all, do it for Him.
Hi, Emily! :D I think the "How to dress" topic is a really debated topic in today's society (not only in the Christian communities). This video is so simple and to the point, it is the best I've watched yet! You explain things so beautiful in all your videos, I hope to show them to my daughter one day if I'll ever have one!
Katie Gregoire has an awesome video about how her purity isn't about her future husband, but about her relationship with the Lord. This made me think of it. You should definitely give it a try: "What the church gets wrong about purity" or something like that. Btw: You're so inspiring! God is definitely using you to bless so many people :)
If you find wearing more conservative outfits to be empowering, then by all means wear them, Emily. However, the part about helping men be less lustful is misguided. We straight men are going to be attracted to women's bodies whether they are wearing bikinis or track suits. The real struggle is in our minds, whether we think of women as people or objects. Women wearing more clothing is just a Band-Aid solution that ultimately doesn't work.
LOVE this. Thank you for giving a voice and a platform for a conversation about modesty, faith, worth, and womanhood. No one talks about this and it's so important
Emily, thank you so much for your videos! Your boldness in your faith is truly inspiring. I am about to be a freshman in high school and though we have never met but when I watch your videos or go on your Instagram it pushes me in my own faith in the best way. I am so thankful for your bravery in speaking what God has told you to say without caring what skeptics say. Thank you for being a true role model.
I agree with this so much. At one point in my life a had my youth pastor's wife tell me, and this is a direct quote, "If a man looks at you with lustful thoughts, you are responsible for his sin.". I was completely floored!! A woman could be wearing bagging sweat pants and a t-shirt and a man could still have lustful thoughts! Does that mean the woman is dressed "immodest"? No. It's sweat pants and a t-shirt. As long as you are dressing in a way that is respectful to your body, and not in an effort to attract "that" kind of attention from men, you are not at fault for another's sins.
love this video, I'm a christian too, hey also told me many times that I had to do it for men and watching this made me realize that I should do it for myself, thanks!
I very much appreciate your grab of my attention straight into the video. Thank you. Always keep your "get-stuff-done" attitude. It helped me concentrate seeing you so passionate as well. I love the audacity, thank you.
I love this so much. Within the first minute I liked and by the end I subscribed. This something I've been looking for on RUclips for awhile. I feel like you're not afraid to talk about things bluntly and make young people really feel drawn to Christ. Thank you.
I love your description of it being all about inherent worth. So many people see modesty as oppressive and I think some of that comes from the idea that it's only done to stop men from sinning.
Hallelujah! Thank you! This is everything I desire and expect from a modesty talk! Living our lives purely to please men is not what God intended! By saying women have to dress modesty for men reduces their self worth and perception that they are their own persons. We were made by God, for God. My body is a temple for God, not for a man.
YES! A million, bajillion times YES! The reason I dress the way I do is for ME. It's because I am worthy of respect and a woman of class. I think the fact that people say women NEED to dress a certain way for our brothers is super insulting to men. God gives them the strength to overcome temptation. It's awesome that when women of God do dress classy that some of the temptation is removed, but that isn't way women should. Perfect video!
I LOVED this video! Thank you! As a female teenager sometimes I feel like I need to show my body in order to get guys to notice me. You always show me that my gut belief is correct and I don't need to stray in order to get a guy to stay.
Wonderful video Emily, this is something I've had trouble with as well! One thing I've struggled with in particular is having my non-christian friends tell me that the ability to show skin and dress less modestly is a form of "empowerment", they correlate it to confidence and self respect as well. They essentially equate being a powerful woman with the confidence to show skin without hesitation/regret. How do you convey to them why modesty's important if they don't agree that our bodies have inherent worth and dignity because we were created by God?
Anne McNamara Great question! One I struggle to convey info about too. Women's empowerment has somehow been contorted in this way, when in fact, depending the circumstance--it objectifies women's bodies. And sinful men love it!
Thank you! Thank you! You hit the nail on the head. You basically took my thoughts and put them together in a way that I can now express to others. You should write a book I would buy it.
Exactly thank you!! Women are always always the ones who have to cover up in order that the opposite sex doesn't feel tempted to fantasize. Nope. What goes through anyone's mind will be there regardless of the dress, or behavior of others. We control our own thoughts, all of us.
I wish I could give this video a standing ovation! ThatChristianVlogger also has a very good video on the topic of modesty from a man's perspective that I would reccommend.
This is one of the best content videos on youtube. I can't thank you enough for what you are doing and how you are. You are so inspiring for many women
Could you do a look book type video where you show some of your favorite outfits and where you got them from? You always dress super cute and classy and I'm looking to add a bunch of new, more modest and classy wardrobe pieces to my wardrobe before I begin college this fall!
I just met you at LTLC last week and I miss it so much! Your women's talk was fantastic and you have a beautiful voice! So blessed to have gotten to meet amazing people like you there who inspire me to be the best I can. 💕
I love you so much!!! I was at the Steubenville retreat in Tucson and I was so inspired by the way you got into the songs you sang and during adoration. You have an amazing voice❤
I loved how you presented this. It is so important that as women in our relationship with God we know our value and worth in his sight and treat ourselves with dignity. Loved hearing your thoughts on this! - Est X
Well, I'm a sneakers kind of girl most of the time, so classy doesn't work for me because I've never thought of myself as this ultra feminine woman, but I totally agree with your point! That's exactly what I think about modesty too :)
The only thing I would add is that our bodies belong to God... and so since we belong to Him, and because He dwells within us, we should always look our best to represent Him.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! I struggled with feeling like I had to dress for other people for such a long time and was even told one time that I needed to "keep my brothers from sinning" by dressing more modestly. Also your top is super cute!
Thank you so much Emily! You are totally right and it is great to hear a young Christian woman say it. Now if the women giving these types of talks had this as their first reason maybe these types of talks would be much better heard and young girls and women would see themselves in a new way and feel better about dressing modestly/with class and dignity if its for them first and not for men first.
I know that personally God cares much more about what is inside than what is outside. But saying that, it's easy to wear clothes with poor intentions and that could degrade the truth that God has made me beautiful, clever, and in his image. I think this topic comes up so much in faith circles and it ends up shaming women and disempowering them. I was once on a week away helping run a kids camp, and I was really warm so I had to take of one of my tops and had a straptop and jeans on. I was pulled to the side to be told that that was too revealing as it could lead the guys astray.....It really crushed me and made me feel that I was a target for every guy in the room, when in reality they had probably seen a lot more WAYY more than bare arms and a kneck and at that moment were more interested with chatting with their mates! Thank you for the different view you take on this sensitive subject, that you don't shame women, and that you want to empower women to make their own clothing judgment
Also, I think it's more healthy to think less about what we wear and more about what we think. Society puts so much pressure on appearance, and then I can occasionally get it from people of faith too.
Wonderfully stated. Changing "modesty" to "classy" makes a huge difference... I have the same connotations I have with modesty because of those same talks
I absolutely love these videos, Mrs. Emily. It's great to hear someone talk about the things you agree with and long for other girls to know about . ;)
Thank you for this perspective! (Presently editing your talk in Atlanta for Steubenville's Christian Outreach Office, that's how I found your channel) Something that has frequently bothered me about women always being told that they need to dress modestly to help men, is that it's unfair to put responsibility for my sin upon someone else (and catechetically incorrect!). Modesty is a tool to promote chastity and temperance, but another person's modesty is not someone's sole gatekeeper against sin. I felt like it was unfair to women to have that 100% responsibility to prevent my sin, and unfair to me to say that I couldn't do anything to stop lust. Thank you for talking about this!
We had a pool party for our youth group. It was expected of me and all the girls to wear full swim suits, and be modest. But the boys were allowed to wear just shorts. I'm a girl, I have hormones too. When I was going to be baptised my pastors told me to wear modest swim clothes and maybe a shirt over the top. I kept on thinking about how no one told the boys at the pool party to put a shirt on. Girls are visual too.
If girls need to be mindful of what they wear then why don't boys? if you have crush on someone you going to be attracted to them no matter what they wear.
I totally agree! Another thing that I think could be potentially harmful with the "because men are physical/lustful/visual, etc." reasoning is that it tends to send a message to both women and men about a man's ability to have self control and maintain purity within themselves. It just kind of sets men up to think that they're victims to their mindsets/biology and can't do anything about it, and that's just not true. If their thoughts are sinful/lustful/impure (which also doesn't even apply to all men), God can still work in them to deliver them from that. Sometimes that message in itself can cause a stumbling block to men and their belief in their ability to combat these supposed "natural/inevitable" tendencies.
Mia Foster perfectly said. and honestly, in today's world where images and videos (some that are not so God-honoring) are just a click away, everyone's pretty visual, not just men. I'm sure it's true that men are naturally more visual, but women are too now. no ones really safe from the temptation. but you see all the time young girls and women fantasizing about celebrity men and stuff like that and it's just as much lust as it would be for a man. so I think that when we get the "modesty/lust talk," it shouldn't be: girls, dress modestly. guys, don't lust. girls and boys should be working on modesty and lust issues.
👏👏👏 i agree with both of you, couldn't have said it better, and also |-/
She is clothed with strength and dignity - Proverbs 31:5 😊
i love how she jumps right into it and skips all of the intro crap
As a Christian Guy, I can agree with this. It almost feels like girls are taught to be ashamed of their bodies because a guy might stumble. When it comes down to the reality of it all it is that guys responsibility to lean on his relationship with God and make a personal decision not to fall into sin. I am not saying that as a Christian guy I never sin because that would be untrue. I do believe that it is an everyday journey for us to work toward being more Christ-like.
I get catcalled even when I wear long skirts and loose shirts. Men will lust after anything. That isn't our problem.
PREACH!!! SOMEONE FINALLY SAID IT!!!
As a Muslim woman, we are also told that this is the main reason. It makes no sense. Especially when our holy book, the Qur'an, it instructs men first to "Lower your gaze". That tells me that the responsibility is on them first.
I dress "classy" mainly because this body is not my own. My body is a temple of Christ and he gave his life down for me. So I honor him with what I wear.
I dress as a woman of class and dignity as a means to honor God. Me come s second, guys third. I believe in laying my body down as a living sacrifice so I don't mind making a small sacrifice in covering up more to be pleasing to God. Great video.
I am not a Christian but I absolutely love your perspective on this. I grew up Christian and was always told that my body was too distracting for men and it made me feel dirty and like my body didn't belong to me. It was a factor that drove me away from religion along with others. But it is so refreshing to hear this thought and it seems to be picking up popularity among Christian women and I am so happy to hear it. Thank you for sharing this!
Side note to many girls watching this: you don't HAVE to dress classy in the sense of dresses, jewelry, and fancy shoes everyday. I am a tomboy. I love street-style clothes. I hate dresses. And that is PERFECTLY okay. There's absolutely nothing wrong with sneakers, t-shirts, ripped jeans, and no jewelry. God loves you for YOU, not for the clothes you wear, darling. Women of God don't all fit into one shape or size, nor do they fit into one style or wardrobe. BE YOU & BE LOVED.
“I have adopted the idea that in my life that there are two parallel lines and one is the amount of skin I show and one is the amount of power I have, and they are not ever ever things that intersect."
Soooo gooood!
Micaela C Exactly!
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DISCLAIMER : I do believe that the women who I heard speak had good intentions. I just think the mark has really been missed on empowering women to dress with class and dignity for reasons that are strengthening and uplifting. And I want to change that.
yes! Thank you for making this video :)
Awesome attitude! Thanks for sharing. :)
SO GLAD you made this 👏👏👏
We also do a great disservice to men painting them as animals who cannot control their thoughts or actions. Men do not all have the same thoughts or reactions, and some men find immodest women unattractive. I agree the whole narrative needs to change.
Whoa, that just clicked something in my mind! I've been approaching modesty the same way you used to ("Would this outfit cause my brothers to stumble?") and have been having a hard time figuring it out and staying passionate about it -- aiming to dress with clas and dignity is a much more clear and attainable goal!! Thank you!!!!!
I completely agree with you! And honestly, a man could have lustful thoughts about you even when you're dressed modestly, which is his problem. As long as I do my part in dressing classy, I don't concern myself being a temptation to someone. I also think that God created us as beautiful women and it is good for the world to see that.
Thank you, Emily! :) It's for this very reason I can't stand the popular phrase “modest is hottest.” I don’t choose to dress modestly because I think it’ll attract more guys or because I’m ashamed of my body. I choose to dress modestly because it makes me feel comfortable and beautiful - not “hot,” beautiful.
Say it again for the people in the back 👏👏
*Claps* 👏👏👏 That being the first reason causes such imbalanced thinking. It should be about reflecting your own Christ-like character, and reflecting that you're trying to be the Lady that God wants you to be. It's like someone being on a diet, and expecting all their friends to all be on the same diet with them.. when they are the only one with a weight issue. Your friends can be supportive, but it's not their responsibility in life to get you healthy again, they can only love you along the way. Love the point you made.
I also always try to explain to my brothers in Christ that women struggle with lust too. We don't talk about it as much, but one in three CHRISTIAN women struggle with pornography. I love dressing modestly because I care about them and I always ask them to do the same for me. Especially at church camp settings, etc: If I'm wearing a one piece or even a t-shirt in the hot sun, can you at least keep your shirt on? I think we need to start opening this conversation and include men and boys in the modesty talks too.
I completely agree with you on this! So I was raised by a graceful, classy, dignified Mother & in Catholic schools etc & literally never heard specifically woman should dress "modestly." I always associated that word with Jehovia's Witnesses, the Amish & strict Muslim women: women covered from head to toe as not to send the lustful men into sin. This sounded crazy and archaic to me. I was raised that you should dress "appropriately" for your age/occasion etc and with class & dignity because you were made in the image of God.
The first thing, really and truly, that you should ask yourself concerning your clothing is: Does this honor God. Not for yourself, not for guys, for God.
I’m sending this to my mom, I’ve been trying to articulate this for years.
I always cringed at those talks but I never understood why. Thank you for helping me figure it out. Well said. ❤️
Awesome!! I have also heard these types of talks and also think it's crazy how we should do it for men. We should dress with dignity because our body deserves to be respected.
I 100% agree with what you had to say on this topic and I LOVE LOVE LOVE that you used Kate Middleton as the example. She and Audrey Hepburn are my style icons and you are right, they dress/dressed with beauty, pose, grace and CLASS. And you explained it perfectly. I wish more women would state this along with saving sex for marriage or acting in general in a way that glorifies the Lord. It shouldn't be about the guys (or women sometimes), all we say, do and wear should reflect that we are daughters of the Most High King...so we are Princesses. ;)
Many people say "my body belongs to me" just like you said. But i think that my body belongs to God and i have to praise God with this body and not disrespect God with imodest clothes. My first reason to wear modest clothes is because my body belongs to God and not to me.
The first reason should be for God because your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.
AMEN! I feel my insides crawling when I hear some of these modesty talks! It's usually skewed biblical principals that feel so oppressive as it's being taught. The fruit of the Spirit is SELF CONTROL. I can only do my part to control myself. Modesty is mostly an issue of the heart. You can dress "modestly" and be a show-off of your money or accomplishments.
Thank you!! Someone that finaly said it all! I went threw depression once in my life because of ppl telling me to dress so modesty, I hate dresses and because ppl telling me that I had to cover everything with dresses and stuff like that I got scared of what they told me cause they said if I don't dress like what they wanted then I would go to hell, so I started wearing dresses all the way to my feet and had a head covering every where I was, home and out, plus not wearing makeup! I got so depressed, I didn't feel beautiful anymore and I cried every single day, and my friends and family kept asking me if I was ok and that I was not myself anymore. and then a verse kept popping in my head 1 Samuel 16:7 and I believe that God kept putting that verse in my head, then I started dressing back to my normal self and started being myself again and I felt so much better, I litterly stay closer to God being myself. Then I had a dream threw my harsh depression that I was in a dark room crying so bad & then a light shined down from heaven & God picked me up with his hand & he made me feel a amazing love that is unexplainable, & he spoke to me and said, my daughter Estera what ever you ask you shall receive, & that love and comfort that he gave me was amazing! & ever sense then I have been myself and getting more and more closer to God, Jesus has never left my side threw the good and bad. 🙂
I'm not a religious person by any means, but I can understand why people practice what they want! I admire how you stay true to yourself and how you are very current! I respect that!
Kate Middleton also has the added pressure of representing the Royal Family of the UK, and it's expected of her to dress a certain way to fit the professional role she has within the family she married into. There is an expectation to not bring shame or scandal on the family. Most of the pressure comes from the Queen herself, although the family still has had it's scandals.
Yes! I agree so much. You worded it so masterfully :)
You literally just explained everything I have ever felt towards modesty talks.
FINALLY, SOMEONE SAID IT. I always hated that in churches I was told that it was MY fault that guys could not control themselves. I remember those church trips where the boys would be allowed to be shirtless going to the pool and the girls would be told to cover up as not to tempt the boys. Everyone should cover up if that be the case. The double standard always irritated me.
Great point. As a Pastor I've seen so many versions of this misguided and/or incomplete logic. That which we choose to do, we must do for God and ourselves, and we will then influence those around correctly.
I'm really glad you brought this up. However, one thing is that our body is not ours, it is God's. I think the first reason we dress, actually the first reason we do anything, should not be for ourselves, but for God.
You're absolutely right Emily! Another favorite Christian youtuber of mine that explains this subject so well is Katie Gregoire. Dressing modestly is about the inherent beauty and love that God vested upon us.
Zandra N I thought of her video too!
Andrea A. same here
Hi Emily, I COMPLETELY agree with your main point!! Once when my bible study group and I went on a beach camp, our leader gave each of us GIRLS letters telling us what to wear and what not to wear while at the beach. And their reasons were because GUYS were going to look at us and get sinful thoughts because some of them 'struggled with porn problems.' This made me quite mad, especially because the girls got letters and did the guys? NOPE. None of us girls were going to be scantily clad anyway.....
Yeah that is not very fair but my youth group had a pool party and their rule was no bikinis for the girls, if you were wearing one you had to put a t-shirt on, and all the guys had to wear t-shirts! So I thought that was a good rule! I kinda wish that was a rule everywhere. ~Rockfeather
I absolutely adored you're video, I'm not Christian. But I dress modestly, I cover everything but my hands, face and ankles and sometimes my neck. I hate the thought that women should cover for men. Cover for yourself and you're faith. Modest dress has brought me so much closer to the Gods. So much deeper into my faith. I never look at clothes or at myself and say "will this turn a guy on?" No. I don't dress for men. I dress for myself, and above all my faith.
Thank you for this! The only thing I would add is that above dressing for ourselves, we should dress for one man: for Christ Himself. If He incarnated Himself for the sole purpose to die for my sins, faults, and mistakes, then I, His daughter and His beloved, can reflect the beauty and class of that love in the way I dress, act, and am. Modesty is a disposition in the heart, not an endless set of rules. Because of this, I will dress to be a reflection of His love for me, even if it means sacrificing that "cute top". So yes, dress with the class, dignity, and beauty that you are--because it is who you are!--but above all, do it for Him.
Isabella Gessler Very well said!
So true! You are amazing and godly. You are so virtuous and inspiring.
Hi, Emily! :D I think the "How to dress" topic is a really debated topic in today's society (not only in the Christian communities). This video is so simple and to the point, it is the best I've watched yet! You explain things so beautiful in all your videos, I hope to show them to my daughter one day if I'll ever have one!
Katie Gregoire has an awesome video about how her purity isn't about her future husband, but about her relationship with the Lord. This made me think of it. You should definitely give it a try: "What the church gets wrong about purity" or something like that.
Btw: You're so inspiring! God is definitely using you to bless so many people :)
I'm 20 and you're like an older sister to me, it's so cute. I watch your videos as inspiration as a lonely girl in Basel, Switzerland.
If you find wearing more conservative outfits to be empowering, then by all means wear them, Emily. However, the part about helping men be less lustful is misguided. We straight men are going to be attracted to women's bodies whether they are wearing bikinis or track suits. The real struggle is in our minds, whether we think of women as people or objects. Women wearing more clothing is just a Band-Aid solution that ultimately doesn't work.
LOVE this. Thank you for giving a voice and a platform for a conversation about modesty, faith, worth, and womanhood. No one talks about this and it's so important
Love love love this!
Emily, thank you so much for your videos! Your boldness in your faith is truly inspiring. I am about to be a freshman in high school and though we have never met but when I watch your videos or go on your Instagram it pushes me in my own faith in the best way. I am so thankful for your bravery in speaking what God has told you to say without caring what skeptics say. Thank you for being a true role model.
You are such a sweetheart. The Lord is def smiling upon you. I pray the youth in my city/country will get touched strongly by our merciful God.
She is clothed in strength and dignity....I totally agree and love all your talks! Thanks for coming to Steubieatl and changing my life :)
I agree with this so much. At one point in my life a had my youth pastor's wife tell me, and this is a direct quote, "If a man looks at you with lustful thoughts, you are responsible for his sin.". I was completely floored!! A woman could be wearing bagging sweat pants and a t-shirt and a man could still have lustful thoughts! Does that mean the woman is dressed "immodest"? No. It's sweat pants and a t-shirt. As long as you are dressing in a way that is respectful to your body, and not in an effort to attract "that" kind of attention from men, you are not at fault for another's sins.
love this video, I'm a christian too, hey also told me many times that I had to do it for men and watching this made me realize that I should do it for myself, thanks!
I very much appreciate your grab of my attention straight into the video. Thank you. Always keep your "get-stuff-done" attitude. It helped me concentrate seeing you so passionate as well. I love the audacity, thank you.
I love this so much. Within the first minute I liked and by the end I subscribed. This something I've been looking for on RUclips for awhile. I feel like you're not afraid to talk about things bluntly and make young people really feel drawn to Christ. Thank you.
This is important! Thanks for addressing stuff that many people are probably thinking.
I agree 100%!! I dress the way I do because I have respect for myself and God.
I love your description of it being all about inherent worth. So many people see modesty as oppressive and I think some of that comes from the idea that it's only done to stop men from sinning.
YOU COULD NOT HAVE SAID IT ANY BETTER. Thank you for this. I've been struggling with this very thing for awhile now.
EVERY 👏 THING 👏 YOU 👏 SAID 👏👏👏👏👏👏
Hallelujah! Thank you! This is everything I desire and expect from a modesty talk! Living our lives purely to please men is not what God intended! By saying women have to dress modesty for men reduces their self worth and perception that they are their own persons. We were made by God, for God. My body is a temple for God, not for a man.
YES!! So happy to hear someone say this
YES! A million, bajillion times YES! The reason I dress the way I do is for ME. It's because I am worthy of respect and a woman of class. I think the fact that people say women NEED to dress a certain way for our brothers is super insulting to men. God gives them the strength to overcome temptation. It's awesome that when women of God do dress classy that some of the temptation is removed, but that isn't way women should. Perfect video!
I completely agree with you. Thank you for putting this into words! May God bless you and keep you.
I LOVED this video! Thank you! As a female teenager sometimes I feel like I need to show my body in order to get guys to notice me. You always show me that my gut belief is correct and I don't need to stray in order to get a guy to stay.
Wonderful video Emily, this is something I've had trouble with as well! One thing I've struggled with in particular is having my non-christian friends tell me that the ability to show skin and dress less modestly is a form of "empowerment", they correlate it to confidence and self respect as well. They essentially equate being a powerful woman with the confidence to show skin without hesitation/regret. How do you convey to them why modesty's important if they don't agree that our bodies have inherent worth and dignity because we were created by God?
Anne McNamara Great question! One I struggle to convey info about too. Women's empowerment has somehow been contorted in this way, when in fact, depending the circumstance--it objectifies women's bodies. And sinful men love it!
Thank you! Thank you! You hit the nail on the head. You basically took my thoughts and put them together in a way that I can now express to others. You should write a book I would buy it.
I've been waiting 26 years for this!!! THANK YOU GURL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YES GIRL. This is so important and I'm so glad you decided to talk about it.
YES YES YES! Thank you for putting into words so perfectly something I have always thought :)!
Yes! Thank you!!!! This is such a great concept and I'll begin to implement this into my philosophies!
Exactly thank you!! Women are always always the ones who have to cover up in order that the opposite sex doesn't feel tempted to fantasize. Nope. What goes through anyone's mind will be there regardless of the dress, or behavior of others. We control our own thoughts, all of us.
Dang girl you're spot on! I grew up listening to those same dang talks amd I CANNOT agree with you more! I love your practicality!
I wish I could give this video a standing ovation! ThatChristianVlogger also has a very good video on the topic of modesty from a man's perspective that I would reccommend.
I looooove the things you speak on and the way you say it, you're so REAL THANK YOU
You have so much wisdom! I have so much respect for you
This is one of the best content videos on youtube. I can't thank you enough for what you are doing and how you are. You are so inspiring for many women
someone put what has been sitting inside of me for years into words
"Classy"...perfectly said!
Could you do a look book type video where you show some of your favorite outfits and where you got them from? You always dress super cute and classy and I'm looking to add a bunch of new, more modest and classy wardrobe pieces to my wardrobe before I begin college this fall!
I just met you at LTLC last week and I miss it so much! Your women's talk was fantastic and you have a beautiful voice! So blessed to have gotten to meet amazing people like you there who inspire me to be the best I can. 💕
I can so so appreciate this video. I love that you got right to the point and I love that you dress to make yourself feel good. ♥️
I love you so much!!! I was at the Steubenville retreat in Tucson and I was so inspired by the way you got into the songs you sang and during adoration. You have an amazing voice❤
I really appreciated and enjoy this ☺️ thank you!
I loved how you presented this. It is so important that as women in our relationship with God we know our value and worth in his sight and treat ourselves with dignity. Loved hearing your thoughts on this! - Est X
Mat & Est - ChristianVloggers 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Well, I'm a sneakers kind of girl most of the time, so classy doesn't work for me because I've never thought of myself as this ultra feminine woman, but I totally agree with your point! That's exactly what I think about modesty too :)
The only thing I would add is that our bodies belong to God... and so since we belong to Him, and because He dwells within us, we should always look our best to represent Him.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! I struggled with feeling like I had to dress for other people for such a long time and was even told one time that I needed to "keep my brothers from sinning" by dressing more modestly.
Also your top is super cute!
just because a woman doesn't dress "modestly" doesn't mean she doesn't have dignity, class, value, etc.
Ashley, I couldn't agree more!
Thank you so much Emily! You are totally right and it is great to hear a young Christian woman say it. Now if the women giving these types of talks had this as their first reason maybe these types of talks would be much better heard and young girls and women would see themselves in a new way and feel better about dressing modestly/with class and dignity if its for them first and not for men first.
I know that personally God cares much more about what is inside than what is outside. But saying that, it's easy to wear clothes with poor intentions and that could degrade the truth that God has made me beautiful, clever, and in his image.
I think this topic comes up so much in faith circles and it ends up shaming women and disempowering them. I was once on a week away helping run a kids camp, and I was really warm so I had to take of one of my tops and had a straptop and jeans on. I was pulled to the side to be told that that was too revealing as it could lead the guys astray.....It really crushed me and made me feel that I was a target for every guy in the room, when in reality they had probably seen a lot more WAYY more than bare arms and a kneck and at that moment were more interested with chatting with their mates!
Thank you for the different view you take on this sensitive subject, that you don't shame women, and that you want to empower women to make their own clothing judgment
Also, I think it's more healthy to think less about what we wear and more about what we think. Society puts so much pressure on appearance, and then I can occasionally get it from people of faith too.
YES THANK YOU SO MUCH, I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS!!!
Amen girl!! I completely agree! I couldn't have said it better.
Amazing!!!! love this so much and it's exactly how I feel.
Emily, I love your videos. It's really helped me as a modern Catholic. I totally agree with you about modesty.
Wonderfully stated. Changing "modesty" to "classy" makes a huge difference... I have the same connotations I have with modesty because of those same talks
I absolutely love these videos, Mrs. Emily. It's great to hear someone talk about the things you agree with and long for other girls to know about . ;)
Thank you for this perspective! (Presently editing your talk in Atlanta for Steubenville's Christian Outreach Office, that's how I found your channel) Something that has frequently bothered me about women always being told that they need to dress modestly to help men, is that it's unfair to put responsibility for my sin upon someone else (and catechetically incorrect!). Modesty is a tool to promote chastity and temperance, but another person's modesty is not someone's sole gatekeeper against sin. I felt like it was unfair to women to have that 100% responsibility to prevent my sin, and unfair to me to say that I couldn't do anything to stop lust. Thank you for talking about this!