Childfree by Choice to Motherhood ft. Nik West

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  • Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
  • Childless by Choice to Motherhood ft. Nik West | So how does one who doesn’t want a child end up with a one year old? And can you pursue a demanding career and be fully present as a mother?
    I sat down with Nik West who shares her reality of not being able to have it all. We discussed about all things motherhood and more specifically the challenges of living your dreams of going on tour with a tiny tot in tow. We also talk about partnership, marriage and how motherhood was not on her cards, but clearly God had other plans.
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    ⟡ Connect with Nik West ⟡
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    ‪@MaxMayaLiving‬
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    ⟡ About Shameless Maya Channel ⟡
    "What would happen if I shamelessly promoted myself for 365 days?" My channel started out as a social media experiment, and now it's a lifestyle. I hope my journey from shame to shameless inspires you and others not to be ashamed of who you are and to share and celebrate that shamelessly. Here on my channel, you'll find videos on lifestyle, inspiration, fun transformations, techie vids for aspiring geeks, beauty, fashion, and so much more.

Комментарии • 81

  • @juliaseazar
    @juliaseazar Год назад +80

    Honestly I think we should call anyone who choses to not have kids childfree. Childless sounds like bad news, like you lack something you desired and it also implies that every woman are wired to desire that and for the next generations we need to break that construct that implies that womanhood is only centred around becoming a mother and a wife...

  • @afrikopopfitness6745
    @afrikopopfitness6745 Год назад +26

    Wow, just wow. I've always wanted children but I get when Nik said I loved this man that I wanted to have a baby for him. That's how I felt about my husband because he has such a good heart. Next month it will be 13 years married, 3 kids one heaven side, 2 earth side. I love him more now than ever. Such an awesome interview.

  • @alisonhilaire4170
    @alisonhilaire4170 Год назад +33

    2 beautiful brown goddesses having a conversation 💖💖💖 2 messages that you shared that stayed with me: 1/ being with someone who truly appreciate you and see you as a blessing, a gem, a real gift in their life. 2/ Seeing yourself (obviously the good parts lol) in that person. Recently, I've been watching some YT videos and now understand why women are cautious about men who make less money than they do or convince them to have children. Unfortunately, there are some women who regret motherhood or men who are jealous gold diggers and baby trappers 😖Nobody wants that!!! Wishing you beautiful ladies to continue having success in your lives! PS : Maya, with that last line you convinced me to go see Nik in Paris lol.

    • @shamelessmaya
      @shamelessmaya  Год назад +3

      I'm so glad you're going to go see her!!! You will LIVE!!! and no to gold diggers who want children!

    • @cintiacin8526
      @cintiacin8526 Год назад +2

      Hahaha same! That line also convinced me to go see her in Paris! I grabbed the ticket right after I finished watching the video

  • @helenemohoric9798
    @helenemohoric9798 Год назад +25

    I saw her performing in Victoria,BC, Canada. She was AMAZING. So much energy, and crazy costumes

    • @shamelessmaya
      @shamelessmaya  Год назад +4

      I'm glad you got to see her live! So talented!

  • @harmonyz
    @harmonyz Год назад +26

    What an beautiful conversation about healthy relationships and how it can really impact us for a better. So refreshing in a time where the norm is to put down conventional relationships that involve compromise and understanding people for who they are and not what they have.

  • @zuri_leigh
    @zuri_leigh Год назад +27

    I knew she was a singer I didn’t even have to see the video, she was just giving me young India Arie vibes!!

    • @shamelessmaya
      @shamelessmaya  Год назад +6

      She is so talented and a beautiful human being 💞

    • @Oyinscorner
      @Oyinscorner Год назад

      Tbh I thought see was India

  • @d011p4rtz
    @d011p4rtz 7 месяцев назад +1

    I was childfree by choice; did NOT like kids, wanted to do what I want when I wanted it to; then I got pregnant...had a choice between terminating the pregnancy or keeping it and I didn't have the heart to terminate after having had 3 miscarriages; she is my rainbow baby. 2 years later and I know no deeper love. I can NOT fathom my life without her. I don't think I truly loved until I had her. been with the same man for 12 years now and now have our own mixed child. he's mainly Irish and Norse descent, I'm half German half black. It's been stressful as a stay at home mom but I love her more than I hate myself and I do my best to give her my best

  • @NikWestBass
    @NikWestBass Год назад +3

    Thank you so much for this hang in Sweden, Maya! This was a great conversation! Motherhood is the BEST gift I’ve ever been given that I didn’t even know I needed! 🙌🏾💕

  • @sacredflowspace
    @sacredflowspace Год назад +28

    be you
    be true
    be shameless boo

  • @afrikopopfitness6745
    @afrikopopfitness6745 Год назад +12

    I think Jeanie Mai has the same sentiments as Nik West she initially didn't want children but because of the safeness she felt with Jeezy she wanted to have children with him.

    • @TheElsaAlvarado
      @TheElsaAlvarado 7 месяцев назад +2

      And look how she ended up, she should’ve trusted her instincts.

  • @marcellejosephine9119
    @marcellejosephine9119 Год назад +5

    Nik West is awesome!! If Prince picked you you’re amazing!!! She is !
    Great interview Maya! 💜

  • @TheeStrawberryLee
    @TheeStrawberryLee Год назад +5

    SHE IS SINGING MY LIFE HONEY!!! 💚💚💚 I needed to hear this Maya- thank you!!!

  • @lisagrace6471
    @lisagrace6471 6 месяцев назад

    Nik, your story inspires me- I have an inner me that had this dream of the life you are living. I will say though, not to dampen things but to forewarn and consider for the future- my child is almost 11 now. We homeschooled a lot, but as he gets older his educational and social needs are changing. As a mom, our kids' welfare does become top priority and sometimes it does require sacrifice and we cannot do it all or do both. And I hope that will be ok for you if that is the case for your kids and your family. I think with younger kids, it might be easier in some senses to travel and stuff. But as they get older, their childhood and teen needs might change. All the best to you whatever you decide.

  • @kharaseeley3208
    @kharaseeley3208 5 месяцев назад

    Maya's content is always a breath of fresh air!!

  • @michellemckinney4678
    @michellemckinney4678 Год назад +1

    I loved this conversation so much. This lets me know that while I am not easy, I’m still worthy of love and respect. I will not settle in my pursuit of a healthy relationship.

  • @WhenSaraiSpeaksUListen
    @WhenSaraiSpeaksUListen Год назад +4

    I really love this conversation. So many gems were dropped

  • @_reannawalker
    @_reannawalker Год назад +7

    I love this interview! Seems like I'm getting advice from my big sisters. ❤ I love Nik as well! I'm a student in her beginners bass course and she's the best teacher!

  • @max11een
    @max11een Год назад +9

    Thank you soo much for a sharing a great conversation and your hair looks amazing!!!❤🤩🥰😍

    • @shamelessmaya
      @shamelessmaya  Год назад +3

      Of course!!! I'm glad you're enjoying!

  • @ajohonly3721
    @ajohonly3721 Год назад +1

    I smile 😃 listening to this ,because my German husband adores the life out of me.
    Going on 14 years.

  • @MaxMayaLiving
    @MaxMayaLiving Год назад +7

    COME ON!!!

    • @shamelessmaya
      @shamelessmaya  Год назад +2

      Thank you for hanging with the lads while we did this :)

  • @Sona77.
    @Sona77. Год назад +7

    Let’s embrace all kinds of woman from all different walks of life. There’s more to life than being a wife or mother. Let’s not judge ❤️

  • @lisagrace6471
    @lisagrace6471 6 месяцев назад

    Love that- "think outside of the box"

  • @s28333
    @s28333 8 месяцев назад

    I loved this interview! Great job Maya and Nic. Her story and transformation is comforting to me.

  • @amarouge
    @amarouge Год назад

    Omg I loved this convo sooo much, thank you so much both for your truth and vulnerability. Left this feeling pure high vibes!

  • @vivianhongkonglifes6993
    @vivianhongkonglifes6993 Год назад +1

    I'm here again i press the bell notification button 👏 Salamat from Philippines ❤

  • @JahneshaH
    @JahneshaH 8 месяцев назад

    I love open honest convos like this. To each their own when it comes to career, marriage, and children. I will say I have a career i enjoy and hold multiple degrees. However, the joy of motherhood completely surpasses that. With the new version of feminism its a common narrative to compare the 2. To me it ca not be compared. You can do both but motherhood is so so much sweeter ❤. I said what I said 😂🎉.

  • @thurayyakey9504
    @thurayyakey9504 Год назад +1

    This was an amazing interview! Many continued blessings to you both 😊.

  • @aishaliane
    @aishaliane Год назад

    This was BEAUTIFUL 🤎🤎🤎

  • @wordsbygemm
    @wordsbygemm Год назад +1

    Absolutely loved this conversation!

  • @elgloriea6789
    @elgloriea6789 Год назад +1

    I love love love this conversation!!! So insightful, mature and fun! Thank you so much for this!!! 💗💗💗

  • @edunlap6594
    @edunlap6594 Год назад +2

    The one and only Nik West! Great interview!!!🎸🎶😃

  • @tiarramonet
    @tiarramonet Год назад +1

    Enjoyed thisssss❤

  • @holamissmusica
    @holamissmusica Год назад

    Ah, just heard Nik on season 5 Virgin River's soundtrack. Congrats 🎉

  • @Msdollfacecouture
    @Msdollfacecouture Год назад

    Loved seeing Nik West perform with Black Women Rock! Great Interview! ❤

  • @VANESSASBLESSEDLIFE
    @VANESSASBLESSEDLIFE Год назад +1

    Great interview

  • @TraeDawn43
    @TraeDawn43 Год назад +1

    Such beautiful and inspiring ladies!

  • @raebae90
    @raebae90 Год назад

    Loveddddd this interview! 👌🏾

  • @johannapearson2701
    @johannapearson2701 Год назад +2

    Hi ladies this was beautiful

  • @joanamnt1686
    @joanamnt1686 Год назад +2

    Great conversation!

  • @SOSSTSE
    @SOSSTSE Год назад +1

    Congratulations Legend. 🎉🎉🎉🎉

  • @lisajenkins7692
    @lisajenkins7692 Год назад

    ok i'm over my hair moment and heard the show. Great interview. As a Daytonian, (dayton, ohio - home of Funk music and the funk music museum), I feel like I heard her name before, but can't place where I've heard it. Anyway I'll have to google her and have a listen...

  • @Alanboy395
    @Alanboy395 Год назад +14

    Sorry to be the one to bring logic up in this conversation after the 1st 5 min of the video but if one didn’t want kids and one really wanted kids, would that be a sign to discontinue the relationship? Just trying to be logical and loving towards someone I like as one who does not want kids and I have no right to deny someone who wants kids that dream for themselves.

    • @harmonyz
      @harmonyz Год назад +4

      I think in a lot of cases this would definitely be a deal breaker. But the way she talks about their relationship now is so beautiful, it would have been a crying shame if they parted ways early.

    • @shamelessmaya
      @shamelessmaya  Год назад +7

      It makes sense for you to have that question. I guess it could be a sign but if you're being met face to face with an amazing individual would it be so easy for you to dismiss them? They both decided to continue their courtship and it worked out for everyone but I see your logical question that doesn't factor in rare finds

    • @Alanboy395
      @Alanboy395 Год назад +9

      @@shamelessmaya of course it would not be easy to “dismiss” them. But I would and have done it because it is part of being a decent person and not wasting their or my time. I’m looking at it from the potential children’s view too. I don’t want kids and I would be committing an act of unspeakable cruelty if I reproduced anyway and gave a child a father who has never wanted to be a father.

    • @mylene_b
      @mylene_b Год назад +3

      It's a case by case thing because many people do change their minds about it during a relationship. Also, women sacrifice their body autonomy (9 months of pregnancy changes their body forever) and women put more emotional work than men. Women are the primary caregivers. I wouldn't call it "denying someone a baby" lol.

    • @afrikopopfitness6745
      @afrikopopfitness6745 Год назад +3

      Sometimes for some women they may change their minds due to the love they find that they didn't expect. In my forties some of my friends that said they never wanted children want children now. Life be lifing.

  • @Daisylove83
    @Daisylove83 Год назад +1

    What a pleasant conversation! Loved it💟💟💟

  • @treasuresofchristtv4844
    @treasuresofchristtv4844 Год назад +1

    Beautiful, very encouraging

  • @7cstair93
    @7cstair93 Год назад +1

    Wow you both are stunning 🥰

  • @yujuy.1329
    @yujuy.1329 Год назад +22

    Do not do this. Do not have a child for a man. Many women do this and it ends terribly. Her one “good” story is not a reason to trap yourself with a baby and a dead beat daddy.

    • @Cravenn5
      @Cravenn5 Год назад +4

      Such truth❣️ child is a major life change for life. A man changes as he grows/matures where he may have wanted a family things can change terribly.

    • @trish3175
      @trish3175 Год назад +5

      I was honestly shocked when I heard her explain the reason for her conversion - thought I was tripping! You should be able to love someone without compromising on core beliefs

  • @babydoes30
    @babydoes30 Год назад

    Hope she comes to The Netherlands! Especially Rotterdam! All the artist go to master 😢😅🤣

  • @angieinthecity
    @angieinthecity Год назад +10

    I'm very much on board of not having kids but I know if I really love someone I would do it for him

    • @mylene_b
      @mylene_b Год назад +9

      You don't need to do something for someone else, you can totally find a man who also doesn't want kids. You'd be surprised that there are so many men who don't want kids.

    • @omowhanre
      @omowhanre Год назад +1

      @@mylene_bfor YOU! See how we’re all individuals and want/will do different things. Why can’t we mind our own uteri and let people live?? It’s super weird.

  • @zeffy8158
    @zeffy8158 Год назад +2

    The background music in the beginning is way too loud lol

  • @FM-yk1yr
    @FM-yk1yr Год назад

    🙏🏾💗

  • @KokiAnn
    @KokiAnn Год назад

    ❤❤

  • @theetravelhippie
    @theetravelhippie Год назад

    😍😍

  • @YeudyPerez
    @YeudyPerez Год назад +1

    Yo, I stopped to watch a bit, and ended soaking up everything. And I am a man. Trying to fall asleep, thought of watching something different. Lol

  • @lisajenkins7692
    @lisajenkins7692 Год назад

    again, i can hear the vid, but THE HAIR LENGTH THO?? REALLY??? That growth rates is like WOW... Serious hair envy happening... Can't focus on anything else. Messing me up a bit...damn...