Fern Brady talks autism, stripping and her book Strong Female Character

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  • Опубликовано: 20 сен 2024
  • Fern Brady chats to Holly Newson about her memoir Strong Female Character, including what her parents thought of her as a child, why eye contact and having a boyfriend have nothing to do with autism, and why being a stripper was the best of a not-great bunch of part time jobs for Fern.
    Listen to Fern Brady's audiobook Strong Female Character on Audible: www.audible.co...
    Listen to the full interview on Audible for free: www.audible.co...
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Комментарии • 49

  • @LeeJ2512
    @LeeJ2512 Год назад +122

    I read her book after watching her interview talking about it with Richard Herring and it was a great read (I'm a guy btw it's not a book "just for women"). I found out I was autistic in my late twenties. I also have an aversion to doctors. They've never helped me with my mental health issues. "I have depression" "Here's a leaflet".

    • @jamesedmonds7519
      @jamesedmonds7519 Год назад +6

      I'm autistic and I work in healthcare.
      Quite often doctors want to do more but are bound by budget, time constraints. Some are bad obviously but certainly not all.

    • @MiloThatch420
      @MiloThatch420 Год назад

      #autistic #genderisfake 😅

  • @HarleyDalle
    @HarleyDalle Год назад +30

    I also told a doctor that I thought I had Asperger’s (I know it’s not used anymore) and she said “you couldn’t have it as you’re speaking to me” waited many more years before getting the guts to ask another doctor. They’re so incredibly uninformed on the topic that it’s mind blowing

  • @sarahkirner9603
    @sarahkirner9603 7 месяцев назад +8

    I found Fern about a month after my late diagnosis and she's been a godsend. I remember asking my (former) therapist about getting screened for autism and she laughed and shut me down immediately since I am "too empathetic" and "function too well daily" and because I'm married. It took another year and talking to my psychiatrist to get appropriately evaluated and diagnosed. I wish more information about adult women with autism was present so that there isn't such... a void for it.

  • @Alice_Walker
    @Alice_Walker Год назад +19

    I alternated between reading and listening to Fern's book yesterday. I couldn't recommend it more highly. She's incredibly smart, insightful, honest and lovable. I feel very grateful that we have women like her helping the rest of us late discovered autistic women make sense of out experiences.

  • @AskingSpot
    @AskingSpot Год назад +9

    My youngest found out she is autistic at 19. We now discuss things that were happening in school that she never mentioned at the time. There were signs but they were being seen by the wrong people. Thankfully it never deterred her from learning. She is in University studying to be an engineer but gets to wear hoodies or hats for brightly lit rooms and takes test in smaller softly lit rooms. Can’t wait to read this book for more insight.

  • @baoboumusic
    @baoboumusic Год назад +44

    Reading the book and loving it. It's sometimes funny, sometimes uncomfortable, sometimes confronting, but never boring, and I have huge new respect for her. Highly recommended.
    Edit: her mentioning she put in the "sexy stuff" because people are voyeurs is so smart and hilarious :)

    • @WyliesPop
      @WyliesPop 9 месяцев назад +1

      It sort of speaks to the power of emotional detachment. Like built-in I do NOT GAF is healthy. And… oof… growing up that way, at one time, you’d be ostracized, while others look to be “liked” and cue off of their peers, you’re saying what comes into your head with little regard for how it comes off. She’s a keen observer of us other humans, smart, and scathingly funny.

    • @carenclemmons5002
      @carenclemmons5002 6 месяцев назад

      @@WyliesPop I totally agree. She is a gift to all who accept her reality. Listening to how her evolution within herself, she turned on the lights where there had been pain and tortured in congruency in her realm, it reminds me of a century’s old author who wrote the book The Mind That Healed Itself or found itself. She is a phenomenal human who has found herself well. She would be a pleasure to befriend. So happy for her grownup life. She has every right to be proud of not letting all the disconnected ruin her life by their definition. Glad I had the opportunity to come to know of her. Thanks Fern Bailey.

  • @MiloThatch420
    @MiloThatch420 Год назад +5

    Bless you for giving credit to TikTok’s autism community. Believe it or not, this has been one of the most powerful platforms we have had, to interact with one another, and share notes and find validation in ways we have NEVER imagined.
    ❤ I really want to read your book. I’m gonna save up, and see if I can brave the public transport to get to a book store, and give it a read. 💕
    Thank you for this interview ❤️ the validation and representation is deeply deeply appreciated

  • @averynhiell
    @averynhiell Год назад +10

    I binged the audiobook, absolute gem (I'm autistic as well). Also, I really like the interviewer in this video and how she wasn't afraid or asheamed to say "autistic" and "autism", which should be normal, but I have seen so many neurodivergent people avoid the word or uttering it as though it was a bad thing. Very refreshing to see it discussed to openly.

  • @brooke4627
    @brooke4627 Год назад +9

    She's like a breath of fresh air. It is so nice to see a positive representation of autistic people!

  • @lucus55
    @lucus55 Год назад +9

    Absolutely love Fern, we need more people in the world like her ❤

    • @williamoarlock8634
      @williamoarlock8634 11 месяцев назад

      We've enough narcissist celebs as it is...

    • @TiesBesselJonker
      @TiesBesselJonker 6 месяцев назад

      ​@@williamoarlock8634what is your problem? So laughably saddening, your attitude. Just because you dont care about this subject? You walk into a music lesson just to point out you dislike music? Find your own hobby, or personality, you party pooper.

  • @Bilboswaggingz
    @Bilboswaggingz Год назад +14

    Amazing, I’ve been a stripper and I’m autistic. To have this representation is so amazing for me I couldn’t be more thankful. Downloading the audiobook now ❤ also I agree with the tik toks being AMAZING resources especially by late diagnosed women, finally my life makes sense. Was diagnosed with adhd 3 years ago and only just with autism, thanks to tik tok and my own research. Was missed for 26 years despite being so obvious, I have similar feelings about doctors trust me 😂 ah just Thankyou for existing and thriving you’re great

  • @SonnyDarvishzadeh
    @SonnyDarvishzadeh Год назад +4

    I'm thankful to her for talking about autism as it probably shined light on mine as well.

  • @sophiabreidfischer6242
    @sophiabreidfischer6242 10 месяцев назад +3

    I dont love all her comedy but shes the first woman Ive ever seen publicly be her autistic self and thats really dear to me. Can relate to alot of her growing up experience

  • @tonyd59
    @tonyd59 Год назад +30

    I was told I couldn't' t be autistic because I could converse with the psychiatrist, he said "when I think autistic, I think robot". Still angry to this day!! I don't believe it is a "disorder" but just a differently wired brain, neuro-diverse not neuro-disordered. Also sick of doctors who think they know what it is, the best analogy I heard was a Russian speaking person who had learned English telling an English person the best way to speak the language.

    • @romainsavioz5466
      @romainsavioz5466 Год назад +2

      I remember a show on the BBC I think, where the guy had to answer yes or no questions to be able to receive benefits.

  • @fionag5159
    @fionag5159 Год назад +9

    I'm listening to her book now and it is fantastic! It's relatable, observant and funny. I could listen to her all day.

  • @yingtongblues
    @yingtongblues Год назад +17

    Really like Fern Brady - very smart, very funny...

  • @tjzambonischwartz
    @tjzambonischwartz 9 месяцев назад +3

    Her doctors thought she couldn't have autism because she made eye contact and had romantic partners.
    Whereas I, a fellow late diagnosed autistic adult who had never heard of Fern Brady in my life, saw thirty seconds of one of her standup bits and said to myself "I think she's autistic. Can't even explain why. Just a vibe."
    We can smell our own. Gooble gobble.

  • @HazyWave1974
    @HazyWave1974 Год назад +19

    Fern is the absolute best!

  • @JSandwich13
    @JSandwich13 Год назад +6

    I also learned about people through books. My therapist almost didn't diagnoses me bc she said that I liked to read books and autistic people dont like doing that
    I used to read books at social events too

  • @wiredforstereo
    @wiredforstereo 4 месяца назад

    I read Fern's book. There where a lot of echoes of my own life, though Fern has experienced a whole lot more autism than I have. My traits are far less intense than hers, to the point where I don't count as autistic.
    But I really enjoyed Fern's book, I really enjoy her comedy, and her appearances on British shows.

  • @fernie5128
    @fernie5128 Год назад +1

    Dear Fern, You are one totally amazing woman and I know you and your empowerment "message" and connection with others will have positive outcomes you won't even know about. Know that you are making a difference!!!! I was deeply moved when watching you take the time to make a connection with the young man who is also autistic, on an episode of Taskmaster. This may sound lame but: you go girlll! Cheers from another Fern, in Minnesota. I can't wait to read your book!

  • @BlokeonaLake
    @BlokeonaLake 4 месяца назад

    I adore this woman. Such a smart, interesting person.

  • @jaredknapp8886
    @jaredknapp8886 Год назад +5

    Fern is best fern.

  • @Friday_WasTaken
    @Friday_WasTaken 2 месяца назад

    hello. dont know if anyone will se this, but is the audio book region locked on audible? it sais not authorised to sell it in current region or something like that.

  • @LongShadong
    @LongShadong 8 месяцев назад

    I really like fern and find shared experience she is funny honest and down to earth I’m a adult man that has autism only got diagnosed in my 30s even though I was basically the strange kid since primary school and my hippie family thought alternative treatment would work it didn’t but well done fern for just letting people know

  • @Baribrotzer
    @Baribrotzer Год назад +15

    ".....they said that autistic people couldn't possibly enjoy novels...
    ...because we don't have the capacity to put ourselves in other peoples' shoes....."
    By "novels", though, I suspect they mean "realistic, mainstream, literary novels". Which are - to judgmental neurotypicals - the only kind of "real" novels. Many people on the spectrum, though, prefer "low-quality genre trash", such as sci-fi and mysteries. And might think, "if it's only going to be about Real Life, why bother to read at all? I can just live it, and save some time".

  • @douglaspouch5313
    @douglaspouch5313 Год назад +13

    I respect her choice in sheepskin bomber jackets.

    • @tarmaque
      @tarmaque Год назад

      I have one similar to that one, but is an authentic reproduction. It was too big for me when I bought it, but today is a bit tight. It would fit her about like that one does. 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

  • @MrNinjaFish
    @MrNinjaFish Год назад +2

    I appreciate that Fern is speaking up for autistic women but it's a shame that autism is only getting greater coverage now that it's easier to diagnose girls.

  • @josefschiltz2192
    @josefschiltz2192 Год назад +2

    Being an artist was really my benign-user-interface with the rest of the planet, but I was and am a covert Surrealist as well and drew Surreal comic strips when I was younger. Because I could also draw hyper-realistically the abstract and Surrealist stuff got past. I really enjoyed the early Doctor Strange comics as drawn by Steve Ditko and I thought that this fellow is somewhat on the same wavelength as me! Mr Spock and the Vulcans on Star Trek was another found fascination and Doctor Who and his TARDIS - later when I found out about the tenets of Surrealism, and especially 'The Juxtapositions of Distant Realities', Doctor Who really fitted. The Goon Show and Spike Milligan as well. All-in-all, a bit of a Surreal life really which has enabled a siege wall that has helped me survive. My GP didn't honestly think that at my age - then 55 - that an assessment was worth it. It most certainly was! Although my user's manual was half-written, the assessment has helped uncover the other half and make sense of it all.

  • @hannah50353
    @hannah50353 Год назад +1

    Love the autistic community ❤

  • @keldsleepnot7961
    @keldsleepnot7961 Год назад +1

    This where is similar to ADHD. It doesn't matter how much people understand either, it's only ever us neurodivergents that find the compromise!

  • @TiesBesselJonker
    @TiesBesselJonker 6 месяцев назад

    I assume many nt's find her work either irrelevantly weird or funnily exotic weird. For many nd's it's smilingly tearful.

  • @anne-zh2kd
    @anne-zh2kd Год назад +2

    We love fictional characters, we love fantasy ffs. we have love and tonnes of empathy. Doctors and mental health professionals really fucked us up.

  • @xagatal
    @xagatal Год назад

    Disturbingly relatable

  • @rickwilliams967
    @rickwilliams967 Год назад +2

    Is the stripping or the autism the strong part? I know what it should be, but I'm curious.

    • @baerlauchstal
      @baerlauchstal Год назад +38

      I think it's at least partly ironic; "strong female character" has become a casting cliche, and I think Fern Brady finds it kind of reductive and annoying.
      (But also, probably works on a number of levels, because she's a clever woman.)