Hi madeleine , I'm Abbie. i am a 13 year old girl, and I've had Anorexia for the past two years. It's been up and down, and it got to the point of almost having to go to the hospital. But i found your channel, and you have been a major part of my recovery, and you have taught me it's ok to love your body and that diet culture is pretty messed up 😅 in two months i will be officially Anorexia free and recovered and i wanted you to know how much of a inspiration you have been. 😊
“And I said to my body ‘I want to be your friend’. It took a long breath and replied ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this’. “ - Nayyirah Waheed I’m in my sixties and what I have come to know is that good health and wellbeing is everything. Our body is our home, we are nothing without it so be kind to it, treat it with respect and love. Don’t punish it or talk harshly to it, every cell is listening. Make it strong and flexible, and feed it with the best food you can afford. It’s the best investment you will ever make 🦋
Oh my… this was a great reminder and it made me very emotional. I am 26 and have been at war with my body & weight for as long as I can remember. There has not been a single hour spent awake, where I‘m not thinking about my body and picking it apart. Society (and everyone who comes with it) made me feel bad about it for so long, it stuck with me. I am so so tired. I just want to feel at peace and accept my body and that I weigh more than others. Any additional advice is deeply appreciated ❤
Immediately after reading this, I took out my journal and wrote this beautiful quote on the front page to be reminded of it daily. Thank you so much!! ❤
Some people are unfortunately _that_ inappropriate. The first time a family friend met me after my younger sister’s passing, her first several sentences were about how much weight I’ve gained. She wouldn’t let it go for a good while too even after I said to her face how sad she made me feel for saying that.
@@MagisterialVoyager I’m so sorry you experienced this, some people really need educating on how cruel and unnecessary their words are sometimes! Why don’t they ever consider how they would feel being on the receiving end of their words, before they speak them.
@@MagisterialVoyagerThe weight comments reflect the poorly developed intelligence of the commenter. That person is incapable of talking about anything but the most shallow of details.
I have a super similar body to yours and it's funny that when I watch your vlogs and I see your outfits I think about how good the clothes look on you and how different I think would look on me, when most likely they'd look similar. It's awful how our own perception (and body dysphoria) can mess with us. Anyway, I practice body neutrality but I still have to say: you look beautiful and lovely ❤ if I can truly see the beauty in others I'll try to see it in me. Even if I want to value my body for how hardworking and selfless it is to me.
Body dysmorphia really messes with us! I feel the same when I look at other women with similar body types to me but I don’t apply it to myself! Thank you ❤
I so appreciate your openness. As a woman in mid-life, I look back at all the time, money, and emotional energy spent on the patriarchal pushed idea of my supposed inferiority. I truly believe it is a deliberate mechanism of control. Shedding that has been one of the greatest joys of growing older. You have an incandescent spirit that shines. Your beautiful personal and home style and all the fabulous food is the icing, but it's your authenticity that keeps me engaged with your channel.
This is so kind Elizabeth thank you! And I agree it is a total deliberate mechanism of control. If women weren’t convinced from a very young age that our weight and appearance was so important, imagine the things we could fill our lives with and the potential threat we would be to men!
I have been slim my entire life. My weight gain is due to menopause (hormones). All piles up around my belly. I don’t recognise myself anymore. Thank you for talking about this.
Watching from Iowa in the US! I lost weight in my 40’s and have gained some back due to menopause. I’m sorry that people need to comment on your weight. It’s no one’s business. I think you are beautiful inside and out. Love your videos!
I don’t understand how people even notice!! Seriously…. I have not noticed any change at all…. It’s not really something I pay attention too much to that I guess. I have gained weight too…. 2 years ago I was in a very bad place and very underweight. I’ve gained 20 lbs and although it was needed (docs say I need more😰), it has still been super difficult because people feel the need to CONSTANTLY comment on it. I hate it. But working on it!
You have beautiful hair, skin, teeth, eyes and a curvy figure. Not to mention all your achievements for someone your age. Perhaps you’re a perfectionist if so you have succeeded.
You inspired me to get back on track, check my iron levels, take my vitamins, wear clothes that suit me as I am… All because I see you absolutely glowing and eating delicious foods and getting out to get fresh air with Roxy. Just basic things but they make a huge difference to mental health. Thanks for being real! X
I personally think you look stunning. I have disordered eating for over 50 years, I refuse to go on a diet, instead try to make the right choices when it comes to food, and as a vegan there are many amazing choices I can make. Thankyou for being you, an amazing lady xx
Hi Maddy, Really interesting vlog today - I think you have taken yourself out of your comfort zone lately and that is such a brave thing to do. For reference, I am 50 years old and for a few years leading up to the menopause I have really struggled and have been frustrated with weight gain and comparing my 50 year old body with my significantly smaller 20 year old body. I have openly questioned when I will be able to 'make peace' with my body and accept the way it is - leading to where I am today - trying to live a life of moderation and enjoyment; wearing the clothes that I want to; eating the food I enjoy whilst prioritising my health and wellbeing; exercising in the way that feeds my soul (walking in nature, stretching and yoga, meditation); solitude (reading). I could go on, and will end by saying that I so wish I had your insight, fearlessness and tenacity to speak your truth years ago. Good stuff Maddy - well done.
Love this Maddie, honestly I think commenting on someone’s weight fluctuations is totally unacceptable. As it happens in my experience, I know it’s not the same for everyone, having a baby (and then another) fundamentally changed the way I see my body. I went from having a very negative body image with totally unrealistic aspirations for how I wanted it to look, to just being quite neutral but totally grateful for everything it has given me. I finally saw that my body is not an ornament, it’s an absolute machine. And it brought me the greatest loves I’ll ever know. 😌
It does resonate! Since having 3 children, sometimes I don't recognize myself. But honestly, since gaining weight, I feel more happiness and more confidence than I did in my 20s by a long shot. You are absolutely stunning, and I think we should all accept where we are currently ❤ You're sharing an important message that I wish I had heard in my younger years.
It’s such a hard thing to come to terms with isn’t it! But accepting our body as it is can enable us to be happier and more fulfilled people and that’s what I want my life to be about now!
I've been a private massage therapist in NW London for 34 years and the one time where fit, slim parents struggle with their body image is when.....they become parents! One or maybe both of them may be working full time and adjusting to their whole existence suddenly revolving around the most precious thing that they will ever experience seems hugely challenging. I say, embrace it! And so often, when they become parents of older children who start to have their own 'schedule/life' they gradually find the space to rediscover that part of their existence. It comes with time and honestly, life's a journey, with many parts. If you are loved on that journey, embrace and smile at your curves. They represent your achievements. And it will come back :)
I’ve been purging my closet today and finally getting rid of all the clothes that no longer fit me since menopause. I was hanging on to my size 12 jeans hoping to fit them again, but now I feel like I deserve new size 14 jeans that fit and make me feel good 😊
Maddie I have had weight problems all my life. At one time I was 250. Then my husband got diabetes and we had to change his eating habits. So I lost weight and got to 160. Now I weight 148 do to health issues. I got made fun of all my life but now at 74 I don't care what people think. I have embraced my loose skin and my wrinkles. Thank you so much for addressing this subject. We all need to be kind to one another ❤❤
I think it's more than just weight, it also societal standards of what beauty looks like, what face shape is beautiful, the clarity of your skin, what you wear, and what personalities are valued over others, I personally have always felt like society has continually made me feel like I'. m not beautiful because of all of the above...in my culture being married and having children is such a big identity as well and added pressure about that as well....so its a big topic.. Maddy you must know you are gorgeous!
Hi 🙂. I've been following your channel for years and love so many of your videos. In terms of better help, I've had a look at it before and it can still be quite expensive. They also don't pay much to the therapists in which they employ which can be an issue. I found the counselling directory really useful as an alternative. It's a free resource where you can search the subjects that you wish to talk about and then it gives you a list of therapists in your area, as well as their fee and their area of specialty, who often also provide phone call and video formats. I hope this might help anyone looking for alternatives ❤.
Just going to add on here: if you’re in the uk, there is nhs talking therapy if your council and GP covers it. (I think most do anyway.) There may be a waiting list, but they also offer video and phone calls therapy which makes it accessible and affordable. :) Personally, I don’t want to support betterhelp based on their sh*t pay to therapists and the controversies that come with it. But you do you. (I understand that Maddie needs to make her sponsored coin and is on a contract, so I’m not going to judge for the sponsorship either.)
You are so gorgeous and vibrant. I am an old skinny lady and I fantasize about being fuller and looking less old. You have accomplished more than I could ever expect of myself. I see YOU and you are an inspiration for all young girls out there. Much Love and Peace from Upstate NY
please please don't partner with better help in the future, they are a truly horrible company! A lot of youtubers have stopped doing ads for them for that reason.
Yes absolutely it should matter when they can be very harmful. They don't vet therapists and make out they're qualified when they're not. Kati Morton had something to do with it which says it all @IME-m1r
I have been going through the menopause for the last 10 years. I gained weight and now have gluten and lactose intolerance. I’m now through it however I decided that I would not let this take over anymore of my life. Trying to regain me or whatever place I’m in. Thank you for the supportive vlog and series Gentle hugs to all
This video has come at a really interesting time for me. For the last year, I’ve thought that I would feel better if I were just a few kilos lighter. (I know, I know.) Over the past month, I’ve been unwell and without even trying have suddenly dropped those 2-3 kilos. But I feel pretty awful, with no energy or appetite. It’s ironic, really, because I would take that little bit of weight back in a heartbeat if it meant feeling back to normal. It’s been an important reminder of how much more important it is to be and feel healthy than to hit a certain size or number on the scale. Thanks for talking so openly about such an important and delicate topic! ❤
Really genuinely enjoying this blunt approach to these conversations - whenever these topics are talked about, it feels very much like you have to be demure and if ur too critical you are attention seeking ect etc. But a blunt conversation amongst women and allies is so refreshing!
I can resonate with so much you were saying. I had an eating disorder maybe over 10 years ago, and till this day I am not fully recovered. I’ve put on weight but not feeling comfortable or even slightly confident in my body. I have a more healthy relationship with food now but unfortunately still not with my body. I know it’s something I have to work on as I have an incredibly supportive boyfriend who loves me no matter how much my body looks like but for myself I really struggle to accept this version of me. It does really help seeing other women talking about this, and therefore knowing you’re not alone in this. Thank you for being so open about it Maddie ❤️
I really appreciate how you talk about coping mechanisms that get you through the difficult times and how they aren’t necessarily bad- just what you needed during those times. Thanks for making this video!
Really love your honesty and positive attitude in this vlog. It is an ongoing and difficult path that needs a lot of self love and grace when recovering from any kind of illness. Therapy and having a growth mindset whilst also having acceptance and self respect is not easy. I really commend you on being able to be so open on this topic and I think it will help those women here experiencing something similar. Accepting illness and getting help is a HUGE step to take and most people do not do it until they have to - either their illness is affecting their life and ability to do 'normal' things or someone else (a parent for example) intervenes. So be proud if you have asked for help. That is the first step to recovery. I also know that if the people around you, friends, family, colleagues do not understand the sensitives you are experiencing, then these are not the right people to have in your inner circle. Choose where and how you like to be involved with the people in your life and find safe places to talk about your experiences. Talk to an expert. Find a friend that you know will support you: whether you want to talk about it or not.
One way to be curious about overthinking which I share with my clients is that that is a part of you, it has positive intentions and is either trying to protect you or keep you safe, and so it is something to be aware of and then use that over thinking, black and white thinking and give it a new job, that is where the therapy comes in and it can be so helpful and insightful. The most important thing is to love yourself and celebrate yourself and that is so possible! Well done sharing this with everyone. 😇
As a 52 year old woman, I resonate with EVERYTHING you are saying and am grateful for this discussion! Body image has been a lifelong struggle for me, the past year with weight gain in entering menopause, I went through it again. Our female bodies are so amazing, and they also are changing throughout life, and we need to remind ourselves of that....adolescence, young adult, childbearing, menopause..... all hormone driven, natural changes. It's rough to remember this and give ourselves grace, you did a beautiful job reminding us of that in this awesome vlog. Our beauty ultimately comes from within and our spirit, start there ladies, take care of your heart and mind, and then accepting your physical body through is changing phases will become easier. Sending love, Erin
I had to talk to some family members this summer when they visited because my 8 year old son told me that he didn't like that they were commenting that he was "so skinny". He also gets comments often about how tall he is and I can just tell he is uncomfortable and doesn't know what to say. It is challenging navigate as a parent and protecting his heart in that way. I second not commenting on people's bodies! Thank you Maddie for this lovely chat!
Thank you Madeleine! Appreciate your openness and honesty ... your thoughts have resonated with me very much @ 75 years old now, still caught in this image cycle ... too many years of yoyo, disorders, etc. I remember being asked twice in one day if I was pregnant... brought me to tears. I'll listen again to see what thoughts of yours sink in for the better :)
I have struggled with an ED, body image and low self esteem since I was 13. I’m now 21. I’ve been told I’m slim and pretty, and I know I am but my brain doesn’t perceive myself as those things. Thankyou for talking about this and being so open, it’s a subject I take to heart and love to hear spoken about.
Thank you so much for sharing this! I follow you (and Alex) from the beginning and don’t comment a lot. But I always love your video’s and they really help me. You are such a genuine person and I love how open you are and enthousiastic about things! I really want to comment on this video, because it is so important. I also gained weight in my late 20’s and now I am 31 in about a week. And I got comments. It was especially hard when it came from family, like you said: I have a mirror. It is hard enough to accept it in this society. Also when every season your clothes don’t really fit for a time, especially when they were my favorite. I didn’t buy clothes for a long time, thinking I would grow back to my old weight. But the last few years I came to accept it and buy myself pretty clothes again, because I deserve to feel good in my body and clothes. Like you said I am trying to focus on taking care of my body and what is does for me ❤️ It also helped me a lot to look at myself in the mirror when I came out of the shower (or something like that) and before putting clothes on trying to look at it with a loving glance (I’m sorry English is not my first language) and say a few nice words. It was hard and I got tears for a time and I still do sometimes. But it helped/helps me! I can look at my curves and generally love them. I am also tall and was always slim until I got more curves, I got nice hips and a bum and I like them, haha!
It’s refreshing to hear an honest chat on weight and eating. I have been many sizes over the years and I totally agree with you saying you should just dress in what you want to wear and not worry. I’m really going to try and take on that advice! I am eating healthily at the moment to lose a little weight. Never weigh myself - only go by how my clothes feel on me. So totally relate there. I do hate the way people comment on someone else’s weight, I just don’t understand that mindset at all! Great vlog Maddie ❤
Thank you so much for this honest and vulnerable video. Truthful especially for woman as myself turning 37 and body changes happen. Weight gain from extreme anxiety. ❤
Madeleine, I have watched you for years and you have always been beautiful to me. Your demeanor, your approach to life, self reflection, self love. Thank you for being here.
Well done for being so open about such a difficult topic. I’m a lot older than you but I recognise all that you touched on and have spent my life on and off of diets losing and gaining weight to the point where I think I’m burned out by it all and just trying to accept myself as I am now. It’s taken a long time but I just hope young women who follow your channel will stop wasting their life on this unattainable goal and embrace the reality that people who really care about you don’t care about how you look but who you are. We live in a materialistic society where external superficial things are given far too much importance and not enough time is spent on just being and doing good. ❤
This resonated with me so much! Thank you, Maddie, for being honest and open about your struggles, showing me that I'm not alone with my worries! I had the classical "almond mom" and I've dealt with a binge eating disorder for more than ten years. I've overcome my unhealthy habits. It took me three years to recover. Lately, I've dealt with a lot of health issues, including an autoimmune surge that led to hypothyroidism, which caused me to gain a significant amount of weight. I'm struggling so much with not having an ED relapse. Your video helps me to realize: I need to be patient and loving with my body. I can get out of this bad spell and lead a positive and fulfilling life.
I hate that people comment on your weight. You're so much more than your body. I have lupus and other chronic illnesses. In 2022 I was 107lbs but I was so so sick. I hide how unwell I was. As I have gotten to a healthier state I have gained weight but I have had to learn to love my whole body. How to respect my body. Chronic illness teaches me things often. My focus is about living a full, beautiful life. Romantizing it often. Find the beauty and live it fully. I doubt when we are in our 80's looking back we will care how much we weighted.
oh my goddddd the thing about you growing up skinny, everyone defining me by it, gaining weight, then losing weight due to an eating disorder is SO damn relatable. literally the exact same thing happened to me (except I gained at 15 not college but whatever). I've now gained the weight back due to binging again and I'm struggling so bad. literally I relate so much to you its crazy.
Wow. I cannot put into words how much I needed that video. So many things resonated with me. Thank you so much for being so open and also just a general thank you for putting yourself out there in order to help others deal with their own problems. I really appreciate the work you put into your videos. Thank you.
Great video and a very helpful, important topic, discussion and a good reminder to try and love and accept our bodies currently ❤. I’ll personally never understand people pointing out weight gain/loss esp when it’s done in a negative way, our bodies are our own, what we are doing with them is our own business xx
im 40 years old and i absolutely love your content , you have taught me many things , so i appreciate your videos , i love watching how you just express yourself, its like having a chat with a childhood friend ❤.
The thing about commenting on children's bodies is so important. I've always been tall for a woman (6ft/182cm) and I've been that way since I was about 15-16. I was constantly told how tall I was or how big I was growing up and it made me constantly feel like I had to find ways to get smaller and shrink myself. I always felt bigger than everyone else, I always stuck out from my friends and as someone who has never liked sticking out or being the center of attention, I just wanted to fix it so I could meld into the background of everyone else any way I could. I'm 35 now and still struggle against that mindset.
Yes! It's the first and often only thing that people commented on about my appearance, and it made me feel like being tall was the only thing worth noting.
I can relate to that. I was glad when i started high school because there were other tall kids,especially the boys. Relatives always asked my mum,why is she so tall,when you, her parents are not that tall. These days people ask me why is your daughter so short,she is only 155cm,i am 180cm. They say,it is strange when both parents are tall. It isn't strange for me,as my mum was asked the same questions only a bit different because i am tall. These days when people ask me, i relpy she has my beloved grandma's size. My granny was quite small,but very lovely with a big heart❤.
YES! I was skinny as a kid and especially my sister and her now husband (I absolutely love them though!!) were ALWAYS commenting on how skinny I was. & my parents too. It made me feel like my whole identity was being thin and fit and that I always needed to look as thin as possible.
Wow this was jam packed with such useful, open and authentic information. Made me feel quite teary cos I can relate. You’re so inspirational and beautiful xx
Thank you for this. After gaining 10 pound recently in perimenopause I have struggled. Honestly it probably is healthier for me but the mental struggle is there.
I appreciate this video and what you've shared as lots of it resonates with me, especially mental health wise. Are you aware of the controversy surrounding BetterHelp? It was a bit disappointing to see that's your sponsor as they've harmed so many people in need of mental health help.You may want to reconsider who you associate with in that sense. That being said, I think you're lovely and I wish you the best in your healing journey. I'll be happy to keep watching ❤
Women’s bodies change at different ages and stages. I gained weight right around 30 and again at menopause. Both were permanent changes. You’re still gorgeous and if you’re healthy, you have everything you need for happiness.
Thank you for making and sharing this video. I saw your reel about this issue and embracing your new body and its content like that that is so healing and makes such a positive impact. I’ve been a long term subscriber and think this is my first comment. I just want to say THANK YOU ☺️ 🩷
Maddie, your honesty, openness, and clarity about food issues, women, and cultural pressures on weight loss and gain, make complete sense! Thank you for sharing your own struggles. Hold onto the fact that you have beautiful eyes, hair, teeth, and I for one, have a very severe case of 'Nail Envy', watching those gorgeous hands moving around! Watching you dance with Roxy, made me laugh! That dog adores you! Keep on doing what you do! love sue xxx
You spoke so well on this whole topic, really sound reflections and thoughtful advice. I really liked your answer about the patriarchy and how it impacts us all… beautifully and powerfully articulated THANK YOU❤
I am crying so badly while watching this video! You just put the mess in my head into words. I think I will watch it every day like a mantra! Thank you so much for being so open, honest and gorgeous ❤
Really glad that you popped back up on my home page ❤ You have always been such an inspiration to me and will continue to be, regardless of the body you are in. However, I must say you are absolutely glowing in this video ❤
I put on a lot of weight during an incredibly awful period of my life, and really resonated with what you said about it being a reminder of that bad time. It’s not that I view bodies like mine as bad, it’s that it’s a physical reminder of awful things I went through. Thank you for having such thoughtful thoughts about this
Oh my I needed this! I’m in a similar place in life and it’s so nice to have some solidarity! My weight gain was (is) due to my hormones and a medication I tried for endometriosis. I’ve become so obsessed with food and my weight which is new for me because I’ve always been ‘the skinny one’. I’m working towards adapting to my new body and loving it through self care. I think I’m getting there! Thanks again for talking about this, it’s life affirming 😊❤
Even though I feel quite good in my body and my relationship with food right now, I have struggled a lot in the past and this was a great reminder and I thoroughly enjoyed the video! You speak beautifully about a topic that is multilayered and challenging. And btw, love that light blue dress on you!
Such a great and important video in a time when skinny is becoming "chic" again. Thank you! I do have a suggestion that if you use bikini photos in your thumbnail again, to also be smiling with positive body language in the bigger body photo. I understand that might not be reflective of your mindset when taking the photo however i think subconsciously it can help viewers and yourself see that body size in a positive light rather than reinforcing the "start of a weight loss journey" sort of image that it is currently. Hope that makes sense. Its absolutely not a criticism, just one perspective. I think youre incredible for sharing so honestly ❤
I don’t see your body when I look at you (except for your cute face because that’s inevitable). I see a woman who owns a house, who published her books about cooking vegan instead of me just eating same vegan stuff almost every other day. I see a woman in a successfull relationship with her husband. I see someone who is creative, motivating and interesting. I see you this way and the size of your belly, thighs, butt or whatever just won’t change my mind. ❤
I found you and I will stay! Your videos come to a perfect time. I´m struggling around food too. Sometimes more, sometimes less! It´s so comforting to listen to you! Maybe you can talk about fear foods and how you´ve overcome them? I find it so hard to not think about my fear foods so much! Best regards from germany! Keep up with your amazing work!
Do you realise I am 38, been watching you for years and yet you speak more sense than most of the people I know.. I love your little famoly and your content..you are an amazing soul and I pray the Lord, brings about peace on your mind Maddie. 🙏🏼 ❤
Thank you Maddie so much. The best video ever. Imagine a world where no one commented on other peoples bodies. Mind blown. I’ve had it all my life and I just turned 60. Even my grandmother always did it to me. She told me not to eat the bday cake etc from a very young age. Sometimes even my mother did too. This stays with you for life. I had a doctor tell me when I was 13 with a broken ankle I should loose weight, at 17 I had an old awful man tell me I “was a big girl” I look back on this and even comments from boys in High School and yet I was only 60 kilos!! I’ve had other doctors and nurses more recently comment on weight and never seem to believe when I mention my whole foods PB food and so I no longer try to explain it. I am over it. Unbelievable and caused a life of always being conscious of what I eat to the point where I do my own head in. Karen Carpenter died of anorexia and it all started with just one single comment by her brothers friend when she was a slim teenager but he said she should lose weight. He effectively killed her. The Patriarchy is toxic and has a lot to answer for. They want women to be preoccupied with their appearance so we don’t contribute to the world in other ways. I gained weight with pregnancies then medication then menopause but am almost finally at a point where I accept my body, I eat a mainly whole foods PB diet but I have treats and vegan meats etc. i have for 13 years now and I never go without. I move my body gently when I can despite chronic illnesses. I’ve had a wonderful husband for 33 years who has always accepted me as I am. I appreciate my body gave me 2 beautiful girls and it carries me around everyday. I made a huge effort that both my girls right from birth never knew of the struggles I had growing up and made sure I did not pass any diet attitudes on to them.
I really loved this. I had a sort of "lightbulb" moment when you talked about how women have been made to believe they have more power/have achieved something if they have a slim body and this is definitely something I feel and it is so incorrect! Thank you so much for talking about this x
You are so gorgeous and captivating. I love watching all of your content and really appreciate your open and honest commentary. We should indeed move away talking about women's bodies, they are ours and not anyone else's to comment on. Thank you for everything and may you have a most glorious day!
I turn 30 next month and have been going through a stressful time. Lost a lot of weight at the height of the stress and now I feel like I’m eating my feelings as I self soothe. This video really helped me as I’m about to enter a new chapter in my life and I want to feel good about my body and my relationship to food
Hi Madeleine! I stopped the video just for a moment when you were talking about feminism (if men didn't exist, etc) to write this comment! You said you could talk about it for hours. I would love to hear more from you about it because I also believe women don't support each other but we probably share a lot of thoughts and don't know it (as I share with you!) ❤
I truly need more people talking about “second puberty” because honestly it would help me tremendously because In the past 2 years I’ve gained 60 lbs in my hips and butt and thighs and NOTHING has changed. Only my hormones from getting into my “pregnancy” age of 25
One of my favorites of your videos Maddie! And that is saying a lot because I genuinely adore ALL of your videos. You are so wise and real. Wow you really do feel like the big sister I never had! I am currently learning to love and embrace my current bigger body too. After being bigger my entire life I lost a significant amount of weight and people said how great I looked and it was so nice to feel confident in my body for a change. But the reality was I was not caring for my body at that time- I was not eating near enough and constantly on the go. My mental health was so poor. The weight loss was due to not prioritizing nourishing, loving, or caring for myself. But I “looked great”. Now I’ve gained most the weight back and I’m learning how to truly love myself. Now I think the difference is I am more comfortable in my own skin because I really know myself and who I am. I’ve spent a lot of time and energy healing. And that has made loving my outer body, not easier, but not as important I guess- kind of like you said. Plus when I love me from the inside out- I naturally take better care of myself and make better choices. Like exercising in a way that brings me joy and is fun has really helped and also because it’s good for my mental health. But I am not strict with it at all because I feel that and diet culture really impacted my relationship with my body, food, and movement. And I could not agree more about the bit of not commenting on other people’s bodies and especially not on children’s bodies. I never do because I know the impact it had on my as a child. I’ll never forget how heart broken I felt last year when my little cousin (who is more like a niece because of our age gap) excitedly told me she lost __ lbs. She was 9. And I just tried to play it cool and explain that it was probably because she had started cheerleading/dance and was more active. But I did not celebrate it by any means. Just kept it neutral. Because I remember being her age and my family weighing me and how shameful I felt. I too try for the most part not to weight myself now because like you said it really doesn’t tell us anything. So thank you for this video and for sharing your experience. It is so refreshing to see. ❤❤❤
Great video. It’s certainly not easy being a woman in this judgemental world. You are right we all have something to offer, we should not be defined by our weight, shape or height. Let’s just be kind to each other and offer support to one another. I always think how lovely you look and admire your style. Best wishes Karen 🌺
Yess food as nutrient vessels! I specifically think about this with bread as well, as someone raised on wonder bread and potato bread, but growing into someone who loves the flavor and the mental comfort of a multigrain or a sprouted loaf. Definitely a mindset that spreads to my other foods as well. Thank you for this comforting video.
This really resonated with me, my little story on my weight if it helps anyone is just last year early 2023, I was my goal weight, doing really well and on top of life. Roll to March 2023, my beautiful mum suddenly passed away, I had the trauma of finding her, and not only was I dealing with grief and trauma, I was also in the midst of studying in accountancy, having a job, and raising my beautiful boy, being a wife and running a house, there was so many takeaways/quick unhealthy meals/snacks, anything to get through the days. I know I've pretty much put all that weight back on, but im almost 40, I'm just watching how much I eat. I still have my takeaways (happy fridays) and snacks im just more mindful of the quantity, and will try and listen when my body is full. I am accepting where I am now, im dressing for my body now, and if I have learnt anything, life is far too short to worry about putting on a few extra pounds, i don't want to be on my death bed knowing I spent most of my adulthood worrying about weight.
I found this a really interesting watch, I have had quite a small build all my life, people would praise me for it but this also made me feel the pressure to keep it when I reached my twenties and my body started to change. I also wonder if alot of this generational trauma, my mum has terrible body image issues even though she is so beautiful!! Women are so tortured in this world!! 😆😆 Hope you’re ok, I think you look the happiest, healthiest and glowiest ✨ you have ever been, you bring so much to people online and that is your power!!! ❤
Thank you thank you thank you for this video!! I still have a few triggers from being in Weight Watchers for a while about 7 years ago, especially around ‘fear foods’, and this video has really helped me 🧡
Younger sister or friend! :) I found your channel about a year ago when "I went on a solo trip to an off-grid cabin in the mountains" popped up in my RUclips "newsfeed".... I'm in my early to mid fifties and have struggled with similar issues almost my entire life, with ups and downs in weight and body image. So, so many people do.... I've done in-person therapy over the years, which I'm sure helped, but I had a moment a few months ago in which I realized I actually cared about myself and cared enough to take care of myself. It's made making changes easier. Your videos likely played a role in that. Thank you! (This might sound weird but, when I started teaching 27 years ago, many of my students didn't have winter coats due to $. Given that, I stopped wearing winter coats, etc... unless it was minus zero degrees. I live in New England. If my students couldn't have them, I wouldn't. Just like, on fire drills, even in the rain if the alarm went off due to a pull or issue in the cafe with cooking, I refused to wear a coat because the students couldn't. Anyway, it hit me this past winter how cold I was and the fact that, at least starting back with the winter coats, I'd somehow allowed my care for my students (I couldn't and can't afford to buy all of them winter coats, unfortunately) to slip into, without realizing it, a deep place of not caring for myself. Add to that comfort eating when concerned about my students, friends, and family and.... I truly have appreciated and have been blessed by many of your videos, including when you talk about healthy ways of thinking and being and healthy things you do for yourself. I really, really have benefitted from what might seem like simple talks about healthy habits and ways of being. I'm not vegetarian or vegan, but I want to learn and have watched you cook ... and you and Alex cook. I'm so ... hesitant ... to start, though. I have your cookbook and look your website but .... Some of the ingredients are things I've not used before, like sriracha and flaxseed meal, etc..., but I really want to try. I was just telling myself to just pick one recipe ... just one ... and not be so overwhelmed. Just one ... not an entire meal plan and grocery haul! I'm thinking of the black bean burger. At any rate, after my mother died, my father, who is in his late seventies, and I moved in together. One of the reasons I want to start adding vegan dishes into our lives involves my father and our longterm health. I've seen a variety of things lately about vegetarian/vegan and anti-inflammation. I have autoimmune issues, and my father is older. My mother died from heart disease. I'm hearing all sorts of things about the gut biome and increased grains and vegetables and want to make healthy changes. Long story short, if I had to guess ... though, it's just a guess, you might have a lot of viewers/sisters/friends who are younger, but I'm here to let you know you might have some older viewers, too. :) In addition to talking about healthy choices and habits and cooking, I enjoy bits and pieces about DIY, decorating, travel, and learning new things. I'm also a reader, so I enjoy all things bookish. Thank you for being willing to share in such a genuine way. It really and truly helps. It's helped me.
I think you are absolutely beautiful, no matter what you weigh. People shouldn't comment on anyone's size. It's rude. I have had issues with my body my whole life. Even when I was small, I looked larger than my friends because of my structure, and I'm short. As I entered menopause, I went to sleep and woke up 20 pounds heavier. Skipping a meal doesn't equal weight loss. At 64, I'm learning to just be happy to still be here. I try to eat well the majority of the time. However, I love crunchy chips ( crisps) and chocolate. Lots of hugs from Texas (USA).
![Kumamoto Masters Japan 2024 | Gregoria Mariska Tunjung (INA) [5] vs. Akane Yamaguchi (JPN) [2] | F](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/EIjZybhsWqA/mqdefault.jpg)
The latest vlog in this series is now live, sharing what I'm eating after weight gain! ruclips.net/video/5nlliqIDv74/видео.html
not surprised you gained it ALL BACK. Obesity is a DISEASE. You need to get your big self on Ozempic stat. poor thing
Hi madeleine , I'm Abbie. i am a 13 year old girl, and I've had Anorexia for the past two years. It's been up and down, and it got to the point of almost having to go to the hospital. But i found your channel, and you have been a major part of my recovery, and you have taught me it's ok to love your body and that diet culture is pretty messed up 😅 in two months i will be officially Anorexia free and recovered and i wanted you to know how much of a inspiration you have been. 😊
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i don't know you abbie but reading your comment about your progress makes me really happy and proud of you! take care!
💖 keep going!! You should be so proud off yourself xx
You've got this, Abbie! Sending you lots of love and good vibes 🌟
Oh my god I am so proud of youof you!!!!!
“And I said to my body ‘I want to be your friend’. It took a long breath and replied ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this’. “ - Nayyirah Waheed
I’m in my sixties and what I have come to know is that good health and wellbeing is everything. Our body is our home, we are nothing without it so be kind to it, treat it with respect and love. Don’t punish it or talk harshly to it, every cell is listening. Make it strong and flexible, and feed it with the best food you can afford. It’s the best investment you will ever make 🦋
Oh my… this was a great reminder and it made me very emotional. I am 26 and have been at war with my body & weight for as long as I can remember. There has not been a single hour spent awake, where I‘m not thinking about my body and picking it apart. Society (and everyone who comes with it) made me feel bad about it for so long, it stuck with me. I am so so tired. I just want to feel at peace and accept my body and that I weigh more than others. Any additional advice is deeply appreciated ❤
This is beautiful thank you ❤
Lovely sentiment!
Immediately after reading this, I took out my journal and wrote this beautiful quote on the front page to be reminded of it daily. Thank you so much!! ❤
Love this poet!
Not sure why anyone would think it appropriate to comment on your weight. Your body, your business.
Some people are unfortunately _that_ inappropriate. The first time a family friend met me after my younger sister’s passing, her first several sentences were about how much weight I’ve gained. She wouldn’t let it go for a good while too even after I said to her face how sad she made me feel for saying that.
@@MagisterialVoyager I’m so sorry you experienced this, some people really need educating on how cruel and unnecessary their words are sometimes! Why don’t they ever consider how they would feel being on the receiving end of their words, before they speak them.
Exactly ! Who cares ! The only person who could get away with it is your doctor if there really concerned
@@MagisterialVoyager Oh, that is just so insensitive. I’m so sorry to hear about your sister, these losses are hard enough to bear.
@@MagisterialVoyagerThe weight comments reflect the poorly developed intelligence of the commenter. That person is incapable of talking about anything but the most shallow of details.
Love yourself Maddie - you are looking great. Nothing wrong with your body - you look healthy and happy
Thank you ❤
U look perfect n beautiful!
I have a super similar body to yours and it's funny that when I watch your vlogs and I see your outfits I think about how good the clothes look on you and how different I think would look on me, when most likely they'd look similar. It's awful how our own perception (and body dysphoria) can mess with us. Anyway, I practice body neutrality but I still have to say: you look beautiful and lovely ❤ if I can truly see the beauty in others I'll try to see it in me. Even if I want to value my body for how hardworking and selfless it is to me.
Body dysmorphia really messes with us! I feel the same when I look at other women with similar body types to me but I don’t apply it to myself! Thank you ❤
You are very stylish and a very beautiful woman.
I so appreciate your openness. As a woman in mid-life, I look back at all the time, money, and emotional energy spent on the patriarchal pushed idea of my supposed inferiority. I truly believe it is a deliberate mechanism of control. Shedding that has been one of the greatest joys of growing older. You have an incandescent spirit that shines. Your beautiful personal and home style and all the fabulous food is the icing, but it's your authenticity that keeps me engaged with your channel.
What a beautiful message you shared! I'm glad I could read it, thank you! ❤
This is so kind Elizabeth thank you! And I agree it is a total deliberate mechanism of control. If women weren’t convinced from a very young age that our weight and appearance was so important, imagine the things we could fill our lives with and the potential threat we would be to men!
You are an absolute gem. This is the side of the internet we need. Xx
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Agreed 110%!❤❤❤❤
I have been slim my entire life. My weight gain is due to menopause (hormones). All piles up around my belly. I don’t recognise myself anymore. Thank you for talking about this.
It's perfectly fine. Shouldn't stop you for having fun and enjoying yourself. It's still you.
Yes! 49 and Perimenopause. I have gained weight without changing my eating habits that were always healthy. It’s so frustrating.
Watching from Iowa in the US! I lost weight in my 40’s and have gained some back due to menopause. I’m sorry that people need to comment on your weight. It’s no one’s business. I think you are beautiful inside and out. Love your videos!
Hey I'm watching from iowa too 😊
@@s30123nice!!
That’s so kind thank you ❤
I don’t understand how people even notice!! Seriously…. I have not noticed any change at all…. It’s not really something I pay attention too much to that I guess. I have gained weight too…. 2 years ago I was in a very bad place and very underweight. I’ve gained 20 lbs and although it was needed (docs say I need more😰), it has still been super difficult because people feel the need to CONSTANTLY comment on it. I hate it. But working on it!
You have beautiful hair, skin, teeth, eyes and a curvy figure. Not to mention all your achievements for someone your age. Perhaps you’re a perfectionist if so you have succeeded.
You inspired me to get back on track, check my iron levels, take my vitamins, wear clothes that suit me as I am… All because I see you absolutely glowing and eating delicious foods and getting out to get fresh air with Roxy. Just basic things but they make a huge difference to mental health. Thanks for being real! X
Thanks Maddie for this vlog. Our bodies aren’t static they change every day and embracing our bodies, as they are ,is really important.
So so important!
I personally think you look stunning. I have disordered eating for over 50 years, I refuse to go on a diet, instead try to make the right choices when it comes to food, and as a vegan there are many amazing choices I can make. Thankyou for being you, an amazing lady xx
Thank you for being you too ❤❤❤
Hi Maddy, Really interesting vlog today - I think you have taken yourself out of your comfort zone lately and that is such a brave thing to do. For reference, I am 50 years old and for a few years leading up to the menopause I have really struggled and have been frustrated with weight gain and comparing my 50 year old body with my significantly smaller 20 year old body. I have openly questioned when I will be able to 'make peace' with my body and accept the way it is - leading to where I am today - trying to live a life of moderation and enjoyment; wearing the clothes that I want to; eating the food I enjoy whilst prioritising my health and wellbeing; exercising in the way that feeds my soul (walking in nature, stretching and yoga, meditation); solitude (reading). I could go on, and will end by saying that I so wish I had your insight, fearlessness and tenacity to speak your truth years ago. Good stuff Maddy - well done.
I’m so happy to have found this fulfilment in life! I imagine it will still take me a while to 100% get there but I’m going to give it my best shot ❤
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Love this Maddie, honestly I think commenting on someone’s weight fluctuations is totally unacceptable. As it happens in my experience, I know it’s not the same for everyone, having a baby (and then another) fundamentally changed the way I see my body. I went from having a very negative body image with totally unrealistic aspirations for how I wanted it to look, to just being quite neutral but totally grateful for everything it has given me. I finally saw that my body is not an ornament, it’s an absolute machine. And it brought me the greatest loves I’ll ever know. 😌
Thank you Maddie! Let's make this world a nicer place to exist in, especially as women x
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It does resonate! Since having 3 children, sometimes I don't recognize myself. But honestly, since gaining weight, I feel more happiness and more confidence than I did in my 20s by a long shot. You are absolutely stunning, and I think we should all accept where we are currently ❤ You're sharing an important message that I wish I had heard in my younger years.
It’s such a hard thing to come to terms with isn’t it! But accepting our body as it is can enable us to be happier and more fulfilled people and that’s what I want my life to be about now!
I've been a private massage therapist in NW London for 34 years and the one time where fit, slim parents struggle with their body image is when.....they become parents! One or maybe both of them may be working full time and adjusting to their whole existence suddenly revolving around the most precious thing that they will ever experience seems hugely challenging. I say, embrace it! And so often, when they become parents of older children who start to have their own 'schedule/life' they gradually find the space to rediscover that part of their existence. It comes with time and honestly, life's a journey, with many parts. If you are loved on that journey, embrace and smile at your curves. They represent your achievements. And it will come back :)
I’ve been purging my closet today and finally getting rid of all the clothes that no longer fit me since menopause. I was hanging on to my size 12 jeans hoping to fit them again, but now I feel like I deserve new size 14 jeans that fit and make me feel good 😊
Maddie I have had weight problems all my life. At one time I was 250. Then my husband got diabetes and we had to change his eating habits. So I lost weight and got to 160. Now I weight 148 do to health issues. I got made fun of all my life but now at 74 I don't care what people think. I have embraced my loose skin and my wrinkles. Thank you so much for addressing this subject. We all need to be kind to one another ❤❤
I think it's more than just weight, it also societal standards of what beauty looks like, what face shape is beautiful, the clarity of your skin, what you wear, and what personalities are valued over others, I personally have always felt like society has continually made me feel like I'. m not beautiful because of all of the above...in my culture being married and having children is such a big identity as well and added pressure about that as well....so its a big topic.. Maddy you must know you are gorgeous!
Hi 🙂. I've been following your channel for years and love so many of your videos. In terms of better help, I've had a look at it before and it can still be quite expensive. They also don't pay much to the therapists in which they employ which can be an issue. I found the counselling directory really useful as an alternative. It's a free resource where you can search the subjects that you wish to talk about and then it gives you a list of therapists in your area, as well as their fee and their area of specialty, who often also provide phone call and video formats. I hope this might help anyone looking for alternatives ❤.
Just going to add on here: if you’re in the uk, there is nhs talking therapy if your council and GP covers it. (I think most do anyway.) There may be a waiting list, but they also offer video and phone calls therapy which makes it accessible and affordable. :)
Personally, I don’t want to support betterhelp based on their sh*t pay to therapists and the controversies that come with it. But you do you. (I understand that Maddie needs to make her sponsored coin and is on a contract, so I’m not going to judge for the sponsorship either.)
You are so gorgeous and vibrant. I am an old skinny lady and I fantasize about being fuller and looking less old. You have accomplished more than I could ever expect of myself. I see YOU and you are an inspiration for all young girls out there. Much Love and Peace from Upstate NY
please please don't partner with better help in the future, they are a truly horrible company! A lot of youtubers have stopped doing ads for them for that reason.
It was mentioned to Maddie quite many times, she doesn’t seem to care they’re harmful.
Why are they bad ?
I’ve found a great therapist on there whose helped me a lot
Would love to hear what makes Better Help so terrible?
Yes absolutely it should matter when they can be very harmful. They don't vet therapists and make out they're qualified when they're not. Kati Morton had something to do with it which says it all @IME-m1r
Incredible video, as always, thanks so much for the openess and honesty...inspirational! Have a great week!
Thank you ❤
I have been going through the menopause for the last 10 years. I gained weight and now have gluten and lactose intolerance. I’m now through it however I decided that I would not let this take over anymore of my life. Trying to regain me or whatever place I’m in.
Thank you for the supportive vlog and series
Gentle hugs to all
Really excited for the rest of this series, such a great idea! ❤
I’m excited too!
This video has come at a really interesting time for me. For the last year, I’ve thought that I would feel better if I were just a few kilos lighter. (I know, I know.) Over the past month, I’ve been unwell and without even trying have suddenly dropped those 2-3 kilos. But I feel pretty awful, with no energy or appetite. It’s ironic, really, because I would take that little bit of weight back in a heartbeat if it meant feeling back to normal. It’s been an important reminder of how much more important it is to be and feel healthy than to hit a certain size or number on the scale.
Thanks for talking so openly about such an important and delicate topic! ❤
Really genuinely enjoying this blunt approach to these conversations - whenever these topics are talked about, it feels very much like you have to be demure and if ur too critical you are attention seeking ect etc. But a blunt conversation amongst women and allies is so refreshing!
Thanks for being so open. I'm struggling myself and I'm starting therapy tomorrow around my distorted eating and binge eating.
I can resonate with so much you were saying. I had an eating disorder maybe over 10 years ago, and till this day I am not fully recovered. I’ve put on weight but not feeling comfortable or even slightly confident in my body. I have a more healthy relationship with food now but unfortunately still not with my body. I know it’s something I have to work on as I have an incredibly supportive boyfriend who loves me no matter how much my body looks like but for myself I really struggle to accept this version of me. It does really help seeing other women talking about this, and therefore knowing you’re not alone in this. Thank you for being so open about it Maddie ❤️
I really appreciate how you talk about coping mechanisms that get you through the difficult times and how they aren’t necessarily bad- just what you needed during those times. Thanks for making this video!
Really love your honesty and positive attitude in this vlog. It is an ongoing and difficult path that needs a lot of self love and grace when recovering from any kind of illness. Therapy and having a growth mindset whilst also having acceptance and self respect is not easy. I really commend you on being able to be so open on this topic and I think it will help those women here experiencing something similar. Accepting illness and getting help is a HUGE step to take and most people do not do it until they have to - either their illness is affecting their life and ability to do 'normal' things or someone else (a parent for example) intervenes. So be proud if you have asked for help. That is the first step to recovery.
I also know that if the people around you, friends, family, colleagues do not understand the sensitives you are experiencing, then these are not the right people to have in your inner circle. Choose where and how you like to be involved with the people in your life and find safe places to talk about your experiences. Talk to an expert. Find a friend that you know will support you: whether you want to talk about it or not.
One way to be curious about overthinking which I share with my clients is that that is a part of you, it has positive intentions and is either trying to protect you or keep you safe, and so it is something to be aware of and then use that over thinking, black and white thinking and give it a new job, that is where the therapy comes in and it can be so helpful and insightful. The most important thing is to love yourself and celebrate yourself and that is so possible! Well done sharing this with everyone. 😇
As a 52 year old woman, I resonate with EVERYTHING you are saying and am grateful for this discussion! Body image has been a lifelong struggle for me, the past year with weight gain in entering menopause, I went through it again. Our female bodies are so amazing, and they also are changing throughout life, and we need to remind ourselves of that....adolescence, young adult, childbearing, menopause..... all hormone driven, natural changes. It's rough to remember this and give ourselves grace, you did a beautiful job reminding us of that in this awesome vlog. Our beauty ultimately comes from within and our spirit, start there ladies, take care of your heart and mind, and then accepting your physical body through is changing phases will become easier. Sending love, Erin
I had to talk to some family members this summer when they visited because my 8 year old son told me that he didn't like that they were commenting that he was "so skinny". He also gets comments often about how tall he is and I can just tell he is uncomfortable and doesn't know what to say. It is challenging navigate as a parent and protecting his heart in that way. I second not commenting on people's bodies! Thank you Maddie for this lovely chat!
Thank you for standing up for him! Please continue to do so, that is amazing and important :)
I personally think you are beautiful. This was so extremely important for me to ear, I needed this. Thank you so so much this was so helpful.
Thank you Madeleine! Appreciate your openness and honesty ... your thoughts have resonated with me very much @ 75 years old now, still caught in this image cycle ... too many years of yoyo, disorders, etc. I remember being asked twice in one day if I was pregnant... brought me to tears. I'll listen again to see what thoughts of yours sink in for the better :)
Watched till the very end. Thanks you for opening up and being vulnerable, allowing us to do the same.
I have struggled with an ED, body image and low self esteem since I was 13. I’m now 21.
I’ve been told I’m slim and pretty, and I know I am but my brain doesn’t perceive myself as those things.
Thankyou for talking about this and being so open, it’s a subject I take to heart and love to hear spoken about.
Thank you so much for your openness and your kindness ❤ you are such a beautiful woman inside and out. Love from Paris
Thank you 🫶🏻
Thank you so much for sharing this! I follow you (and Alex) from the beginning and don’t comment a lot. But I always love your video’s and they really help me. You are such a genuine person and I love how open you are and enthousiastic about things!
I really want to comment on this video, because it is so important. I also gained weight in my late 20’s and now I am 31 in about a week. And I got comments. It was especially hard when it came from family, like you said: I have a mirror. It is hard enough to accept it in this society. Also when every season your clothes don’t really fit for a time, especially when they were my favorite. I didn’t buy clothes for a long time, thinking I would grow back to my old weight. But the last few years I came to accept it and buy myself pretty clothes again, because I deserve to feel good in my body and clothes. Like you said I am trying to focus on taking care of my body and what is does for me ❤️ It also helped me a lot to look at myself in the mirror when I came out of the shower (or something like that) and before putting clothes on trying to look at it with a loving glance (I’m sorry English is not my first language) and say a few nice words. It was hard and I got tears for a time and I still do sometimes. But it helped/helps me! I can look at my curves and generally love them. I am also tall and was always slim until I got more curves, I got nice hips and a bum and I like them, haha!
It’s refreshing to hear an honest chat on weight and eating. I have been many sizes over the years and I totally agree with you saying you should just dress in what you want to wear and not worry. I’m really going to try and take on that advice! I am eating healthily at the moment to lose a little weight.
Never weigh myself - only go by how my clothes feel on me. So totally relate there.
I do hate the way people comment on someone else’s weight, I just don’t understand that mindset at all!
Great vlog Maddie ❤
Just love this one! Thanks for being so honest in sharing your journey! So important and inspiring! ❤
Thank you so much for this honest and vulnerable video. Truthful especially for woman as myself turning 37 and body changes happen. Weight gain from extreme anxiety. ❤
Madeleine, I have watched you for years and you have always been beautiful to me. Your demeanor, your approach to life, self reflection, self love. Thank you for being here.
Well done for being so open about such a difficult topic. I’m a lot older than you but I recognise all that you touched on and have spent my life on and off of diets losing and gaining weight to the point where I think I’m burned out by it all and just trying to accept myself as I am now. It’s taken a long time but I just hope young women who follow your channel will stop wasting their life on this unattainable goal and embrace the reality that people who really care about you don’t care about how you look but who you are. We live in a materialistic society where external superficial things are given far too much importance and not enough time is spent on just being and doing good. ❤
This resonated with me so much! Thank you, Maddie, for being honest and open about your struggles, showing me that I'm not alone with my worries! I had the classical "almond mom" and I've dealt with a binge eating disorder for more than ten years. I've overcome my unhealthy habits. It took me three years to recover. Lately, I've dealt with a lot of health issues, including an autoimmune surge that led to hypothyroidism, which caused me to gain a significant amount of weight. I'm struggling so much with not having an ED relapse. Your video helps me to realize: I need to be patient and loving with my body. I can get out of this bad spell and lead a positive and fulfilling life.
I hate that people comment on your weight. You're so much more than your body. I have lupus and other chronic illnesses. In 2022 I was 107lbs but I was so so sick. I hide how unwell I was. As I have gotten to a healthier state I have gained weight but I have had to learn to love my whole body. How to respect my body. Chronic illness teaches me things often. My focus is about living a full, beautiful life. Romantizing it often. Find the beauty and live it fully. I doubt when we are in our 80's looking back we will care how much we weighted.
oh my goddddd the thing about you growing up skinny, everyone defining me by it, gaining weight, then losing weight due to an eating disorder is SO damn relatable. literally the exact same thing happened to me (except I gained at 15 not college but whatever). I've now gained the weight back due to binging again and I'm struggling so bad. literally I relate so much to you its crazy.
Wow. I cannot put into words how much I needed that video. So many things resonated with me. Thank you so much for being so open and also just a general thank you for putting yourself out there in order to help others deal with their own problems.
I really appreciate the work you put into your videos. Thank you.
Great video and a very helpful, important topic, discussion and a good reminder to try and love and accept our bodies currently ❤. I’ll personally never understand people pointing out weight gain/loss esp when it’s done in a negative way, our bodies are our own, what we are doing with them is our own business xx
I agree!!
im 40 years old and i absolutely love your content , you have taught me many things , so i appreciate your videos , i love watching how you just express yourself, its like having a chat with a childhood friend ❤.
I watched one of your videos this morning when I was getting ready and it helped get rid of my anxiety. Your vlogs are so lovely to watch
The thing about commenting on children's bodies is so important. I've always been tall for a woman (6ft/182cm) and I've been that way since I was about 15-16. I was constantly told how tall I was or how big I was growing up and it made me constantly feel like I had to find ways to get smaller and shrink myself. I always felt bigger than everyone else, I always stuck out from my friends and as someone who has never liked sticking out or being the center of attention, I just wanted to fix it so I could meld into the background of everyone else any way I could. I'm 35 now and still struggle against that mindset.
Yes! It's the first and often only thing that people commented on about my appearance, and it made me feel like being tall was the only thing worth noting.
I can relate to that. I was glad when i started high school because there were other tall kids,especially the boys. Relatives always asked my mum,why is she so tall,when you, her parents are not that tall. These days people ask me why is your daughter so short,she is only 155cm,i am 180cm. They say,it is strange when both parents are tall. It isn't strange for me,as my mum was asked the same questions only a bit different because i am tall. These days when people ask me, i relpy she has my beloved grandma's size. My granny was quite small,but very lovely with a big heart❤.
YES! I was skinny as a kid and especially my sister and her now husband (I absolutely love them though!!) were ALWAYS commenting on how skinny I was. & my parents too. It made me feel like my whole identity was being thin and fit and that I always needed to look as thin as possible.
Wow this was jam packed with such useful, open and authentic information. Made me feel quite teary cos I can relate. You’re so inspirational and beautiful xx
Thank you for this. After gaining 10 pound recently in perimenopause I have struggled. Honestly it probably is healthier for me but the mental struggle is there.
I appreciate this video and what you've shared as lots of it resonates with me, especially mental health wise.
Are you aware of the controversy surrounding BetterHelp? It was a bit disappointing to see that's your sponsor as they've harmed so many people in need of mental health help.You may want to reconsider who you associate with in that sense.
That being said, I think you're lovely and I wish you the best in your healing journey. I'll be happy to keep watching ❤
Thank you for speaking about it so honestly. All of the things you have said are exactly what I needed to hear.
The timing of this video, wow. Thank you!
You're an inspiration. Period. Thank you
Women’s bodies change at different ages and stages. I gained weight right around 30 and again at menopause. Both were permanent changes. You’re still gorgeous and if you’re healthy, you have everything you need for happiness.
Thank you for making and sharing this video. I saw your reel about this issue and embracing your new body and its content like that that is so healing and makes such a positive impact. I’ve been a long term subscriber and think this is my first comment. I just want to say THANK YOU ☺️ 🩷
Maddie, your honesty, openness, and clarity about food issues, women, and cultural pressures on weight loss and gain, make complete sense! Thank you for sharing your own struggles. Hold onto the fact that you have beautiful eyes, hair, teeth, and I for one, have a very severe case of 'Nail Envy', watching those gorgeous hands moving around!
Watching you dance with Roxy, made me laugh! That dog adores you! Keep on doing what you do!
love sue xxx
You spoke so well on this whole topic, really sound reflections and thoughtful advice. I really liked your answer about the patriarchy and how it impacts us all… beautifully and powerfully articulated THANK YOU❤
I am crying so badly while watching this video! You just put the mess in my head into words. I think I will watch it every day like a mantra! Thank you so much for being so open, honest and gorgeous ❤
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your approach to such a sensitive topic is very admirable. thank you for your advice, opinion and thoughts, it does mean a lot ❤
Wow you're honesty and goodness are beautiful, your videos are gorgeous and so encouraging. Thank you!!
Thank you!
Thank you for this video Maddie❤️Making small steps to not feel so guilty about weight changes & eating
Definitely appreciated the honesty and vulnerability! Making me realise I need to seek help for myself and get some diagnoses
One of the best vlogs you've done 👏🏻👏🏻 thank you, Maddie!!!
Really glad that you popped back up on my home page ❤
You have always been such an inspiration to me and will continue to be, regardless of the body you are in. However, I must say you are absolutely glowing in this video ❤
I put on a lot of weight during an incredibly awful period of my life, and really resonated with what you said about it being a reminder of that bad time. It’s not that I view bodies like mine as bad, it’s that it’s a physical reminder of awful things I went through. Thank you for having such thoughtful thoughts about this
Oh my I needed this! I’m in a similar place in life and it’s so nice to have some solidarity! My weight gain was (is) due to my hormones and a medication I tried for endometriosis. I’ve become so obsessed with food and my weight which is new for me because I’ve always been ‘the skinny one’. I’m working towards adapting to my new body and loving it through self care. I think I’m getting there! Thanks again for talking about this, it’s life affirming 😊❤
Even though I feel quite good in my body and my relationship with food right now, I have struggled a lot in the past and this was a great reminder and I thoroughly enjoyed the video! You speak beautifully about a topic that is multilayered and challenging. And btw, love that light blue dress on you!
If you’re healthy there’s nothing else to say, tbh. And if you’re happy, well, that’s a win-win! 🎉
Such a great and important video in a time when skinny is becoming "chic" again. Thank you!
I do have a suggestion that if you use bikini photos in your thumbnail again, to also be smiling with positive body language in the bigger body photo. I understand that might not be reflective of your mindset when taking the photo however i think subconsciously it can help viewers and yourself see that body size in a positive light rather than reinforcing the "start of a weight loss journey" sort of image that it is currently. Hope that makes sense. Its absolutely not a criticism, just one perspective. I think youre incredible for sharing so honestly ❤
I don’t see your body when I look at you (except for your cute face because that’s inevitable). I see a woman who owns a house, who published her books about cooking vegan instead of me just eating same vegan stuff almost every other day. I see a woman in a successfull relationship with her husband. I see someone who is creative, motivating and interesting. I see you this way and the size of your belly, thighs, butt or whatever just won’t change my mind. ❤
Exactly!!!! You said it perfectly!
I found you and I will stay! Your videos come to a perfect time. I´m struggling around food too. Sometimes more, sometimes less! It´s so comforting to listen to you! Maybe you can talk about fear foods and how you´ve overcome them? I find it so hard to not think about my fear foods so much! Best regards from germany! Keep up with your amazing work!
Do you realise I am 38, been watching you for years and yet you speak more sense than most of the people I know.. I love your little famoly and your content..you are an amazing soul and I pray the Lord, brings about peace on your mind Maddie. 🙏🏼 ❤
Thank you Maddie so much. The best video ever. Imagine a world where no one commented on other peoples bodies. Mind blown. I’ve had it all my life and I just turned 60. Even my grandmother always did it to me. She told me not to eat the bday cake etc from a very young age. Sometimes even my mother did too. This stays with you for life. I had a doctor tell me when I was 13 with a broken ankle I should loose weight, at 17 I had an old awful man tell me I “was a big girl” I look back on this and even comments from boys in High School and yet I was only 60 kilos!! I’ve had other doctors and nurses more recently comment on weight and never seem to believe when I mention my whole foods PB food and so I no longer try to explain it. I am over it. Unbelievable and caused a life of always being conscious of what I eat to the point where I do my own head in. Karen Carpenter died of anorexia and it all started with just one single comment by her brothers friend when she was a slim teenager but he said she should lose weight. He effectively killed her. The Patriarchy is toxic and has a lot to answer for. They want women to be preoccupied with their appearance so we don’t contribute to the world in other ways. I gained weight with pregnancies then medication then menopause but am almost finally at a point where I accept my body, I eat a mainly whole foods PB diet but I have treats and vegan meats etc. i have for 13 years now and I never go without. I move my body gently when I can despite chronic illnesses. I’ve had a wonderful husband for 33 years who has always accepted me as I am. I appreciate my body gave me 2 beautiful girls and it carries me around everyday. I made a huge effort that both my girls right from birth never knew of the struggles I had growing up and made sure I did not pass any diet attitudes on to them.
I really loved this. I had a sort of "lightbulb" moment when you talked about how women have been made to believe they have more power/have achieved something if they have a slim body and this is definitely something I feel and it is so incorrect! Thank you so much for talking about this x
You are so gorgeous and captivating. I love watching all of your content and really appreciate your open and honest commentary. We should indeed move away talking about women's bodies, they are ours and not anyone else's to comment on. Thank you for everything and may you have a most glorious day!
I turn 30 next month and have been going through a stressful time. Lost a lot of weight at the height of the stress and now I feel like I’m eating my feelings as I self soothe. This video really helped me as I’m about to enter a new chapter in my life and I want to feel good about my body and my relationship to food
Hi Madeleine! I stopped the video just for a moment when you were talking about feminism (if men didn't exist, etc) to write this comment! You said you could talk about it for hours. I would love to hear more from you about it because I also believe women don't support each other but we probably share a lot of thoughts and don't know it (as I share with you!) ❤
I truly need more people talking about “second puberty” because honestly it would help me tremendously because In the past 2 years I’ve gained 60 lbs in my hips and butt and thighs and NOTHING has changed. Only my hormones from getting into my “pregnancy” age of 25
Thanks for your honesty Maddie. You look fab. 🤗
One of my favorites of your videos Maddie! And that is saying a lot because I genuinely adore ALL of your videos. You are so wise and real. Wow you really do feel like the big sister I never had! I am currently learning to love and embrace my current bigger body too. After being bigger my entire life I lost a significant amount of weight and people said how great I looked and it was so nice to feel confident in my body for a change. But the reality was I was not caring for my body at that time- I was not eating near enough and constantly on the go. My mental health was so poor. The weight loss was due to not prioritizing nourishing, loving, or caring for myself. But I “looked great”. Now I’ve gained most the weight back and I’m learning how to truly love myself. Now I think the difference is I am more comfortable in my own skin because I really know myself and who I am. I’ve spent a lot of time and energy healing. And that has made loving my outer body, not easier, but not as important I guess- kind of like you said. Plus when I love me from the inside out- I naturally take better care of myself and make better choices. Like exercising in a way that brings me joy and is fun has really helped and also because it’s good for my mental health. But I am not strict with it at all because I feel that and diet culture really impacted my relationship with my body, food, and movement. And I could not agree more about the bit of not commenting on other people’s bodies and especially not on children’s bodies. I never do because I know the impact it had on my as a child. I’ll never forget how heart broken I felt last year when my little cousin (who is more like a niece because of our age gap) excitedly told me she lost __ lbs. She was 9. And I just tried to play it cool and explain that it was probably because she had started cheerleading/dance and was more active. But I did not celebrate it by any means. Just kept it neutral. Because I remember being her age and my family weighing me and how shameful I felt. I too try for the most part not to weight myself now because like you said it really doesn’t tell us anything. So thank you for this video and for sharing your experience. It is so refreshing to see. ❤❤❤
Always so eloquent and thoughtful in sharing your views and thoughts. I really appreciate that in your content!
Great video. It’s certainly not easy being a woman in this judgemental world. You are right we all have something to offer, we should not be defined by our weight, shape or height. Let’s just be kind to each other and offer support to one another. I always think how lovely you look and admire your style. Best wishes Karen 🌺
You are just beautiful inside and out - thank you for this thought provoking vlog.
Yess food as nutrient vessels! I specifically think about this with bread as well, as someone raised on wonder bread and potato bread, but growing into someone who loves the flavor and the mental comfort of a multigrain or a sprouted loaf. Definitely a mindset that spreads to my other foods as well.
Thank you for this comforting video.
You are a beautiful woman and an inspiration to all us gals we all change with time and we must embrace every season and learn to love every change 💓
This really resonated with me, my little story on my weight if it helps anyone is just last year early 2023, I was my goal weight, doing really well and on top of life.
Roll to March 2023, my beautiful mum suddenly passed away, I had the trauma of finding her, and not only was I dealing with grief and trauma, I was also in the midst of studying in accountancy, having a job, and raising my beautiful boy, being a wife and running a house, there was so many takeaways/quick unhealthy meals/snacks, anything to get through the days.
I know I've pretty much put all that weight back on, but im almost 40, I'm just watching how much I eat. I still have my takeaways (happy fridays) and snacks im just more mindful of the quantity, and will try and listen when my body is full.
I am accepting where I am now, im dressing for my body now, and if I have learnt anything, life is far too short to worry about putting on a few extra pounds, i don't want to be on my death bed knowing I spent most of my adulthood worrying about weight.
I found this a really interesting watch, I have had quite a small build all my life, people would praise me for it but this also made me feel the pressure to keep it when I reached my twenties and my body started to change. I also wonder if alot of this generational trauma, my mum has terrible body image issues even though she is so beautiful!! Women are so tortured in this world!! 😆😆
Hope you’re ok, I think you look the happiest, healthiest and glowiest ✨ you have ever been, you bring so much to people online and that is your power!!! ❤
I loved loved loved this chat full of compassion and supportive, practical advice and thoughts. The casual sofa chats are so nice.
Thank you thank you thank you for this video!! I still have a few triggers from being in Weight Watchers for a while about 7 years ago, especially around ‘fear foods’, and this video has really helped me 🧡
Omg thank you for this video! Needed this at this time in my life, I was ment to find this vlog❤
Younger sister or friend! :) I found your channel about a year ago when "I went on a solo trip to an off-grid cabin in the mountains" popped up in my RUclips "newsfeed".... I'm in my early to mid fifties and have struggled with similar issues almost my entire life, with ups and downs in weight and body image. So, so many people do.... I've done in-person therapy over the years, which I'm sure helped, but I had a moment a few months ago in which I realized I actually cared about myself and cared enough to take care of myself. It's made making changes easier. Your videos likely played a role in that. Thank you! (This might sound weird but, when I started teaching 27 years ago, many of my students didn't have winter coats due to $. Given that, I stopped wearing winter coats, etc... unless it was minus zero degrees. I live in New England. If my students couldn't have them, I wouldn't. Just like, on fire drills, even in the rain if the alarm went off due to a pull or issue in the cafe with cooking, I refused to wear a coat because the students couldn't. Anyway, it hit me this past winter how cold I was and the fact that, at least starting back with the winter coats, I'd somehow allowed my care for my students (I couldn't and can't afford to buy all of them winter coats, unfortunately) to slip into, without realizing it, a deep place of not caring for myself. Add to that comfort eating when concerned about my students, friends, and family and.... I truly have appreciated and have been blessed by many of your videos, including when you talk about healthy ways of thinking and being and healthy things you do for yourself. I really, really have benefitted from what might seem like simple talks about healthy habits and ways of being. I'm not vegetarian or vegan, but I want to learn and have watched you cook ... and you and Alex cook. I'm so ... hesitant ... to start, though. I have your cookbook and look your website but .... Some of the ingredients are things I've not used before, like sriracha and flaxseed meal, etc..., but I really want to try. I was just telling myself to just pick one recipe ... just one ... and not be so overwhelmed. Just one ... not an entire meal plan and grocery haul! I'm thinking of the black bean burger. At any rate, after my mother died, my father, who is in his late seventies, and I moved in together. One of the reasons I want to start adding vegan dishes into our lives involves my father and our longterm health. I've seen a variety of things lately about vegetarian/vegan and anti-inflammation. I have autoimmune issues, and my father is older. My mother died from heart disease. I'm hearing all sorts of things about the gut biome and increased grains and vegetables and want to make healthy changes. Long story short, if I had to guess ... though, it's just a guess, you might have a lot of viewers/sisters/friends who are younger, but I'm here to let you know you might have some older viewers, too. :) In addition to talking about healthy choices and habits and cooking, I enjoy bits and pieces about DIY, decorating, travel, and learning new things. I'm also a reader, so I enjoy all things bookish. Thank you for being willing to share in such a genuine way. It really and truly helps. It's helped me.
I love your honesty, thank you.
I think you are absolutely beautiful, no matter what you weigh. People shouldn't comment on anyone's size. It's rude. I have had issues with my body my whole life. Even when I was small, I looked larger than my friends because of my structure, and I'm short. As I entered menopause, I went to sleep and woke up 20 pounds heavier. Skipping a meal doesn't equal weight loss. At 64, I'm learning to just be happy to still be here. I try to eat well the majority of the time. However, I love crunchy chips ( crisps) and chocolate. Lots of hugs from Texas (USA).