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You’re the second artist I’ve watched that I’ve heard talked about this. Glad to see artists being open about things like this, it’s fascinating seeing how other creative brains work if that makes sense.

As someone in around your situation you should try lucid dreaming, atleast for me personally my dreams are between the 1-2 range and it's honestly a surreal experience. I've done it probably more time then i can remember mostly because i don't remember most of my dreams even right after waking up but ut just kinda feels nice whilst waking up

IDK if I have an aphantasia, but that, in theory, might be related to that I haven't dreams my entire life.

I feel this 😞 I’ve been drawing for years (started in middle school now 27 y/o) and have a BFA in Media arts, and visualizing is so difficult when you don’t “see” things. For me I think about all the different types of apples there are so they overlap in my imagination, not getting a set shape/color that I can see. For faces…I’m the same, I can recall if I’ve seen someone before, but I could not picture them in my head if you asked me about them. I haven’t drawn in a long while and watching your speedpaint reminded me of how I draw as well. I’ve learned volume and shape, but visualizing to draw is so difficult and I can’t get a set image/goal for my art in my mind to be able to draw. 🤝

Wait i literally have the exact same things with apples and stuff from imagination but i can remember things that happen to me so how would that work???? Like i can draw an apple perfectly fine but i cant close my eyes and see a full apple at most i can see the line things like you described how it worked with the line dissappearing things.

Despite how chronically online I am since I was like 15 (it was covid's fault i swear😭) You are like the third youtuber that I actually stick around. The youngest too. Honestly, this is really interesting, and I am ashamed to say I didn't really know about this before. However, it's great that I learn every day. It's also amazing how people in the comments found comfort and understanding here. It must be hard being an artist like this, yet your drawings are awesome. Your content is interesting and educating. I can already picture your success in youtube. (see what I did there? I'm stupid) Oh and I have one question. Does your character have brown or white hair right now?

Wait if I can think of the colors and the shape and stuff is that considered a mental image or does it have to be that I physically see it?😅

I can’t see the Apple with great detail, I can’t rly see it at all, but I can like think about what it looked like… sooo.. that makes sense. I’ve never been able to

I can see very detailed images in my head when i visualize stuff in my head

Oh my gorsh, MD music in the background!

It was incredible that youtube recomended me your video. Listening to you, I've heard the same thoughts and explanations I recognised from my own life. I've found out about aphantasia as an adult. Growing up I thought everyone experienced the world the same way I do. Imagine my surprise that people see the picture in their mind as they are drawing and just copy it, instead of going off of vibes and making stuff up with every pencil stroke (like I have to). It doesn't mean I can't recall things though. I know the layout of my house. I know that there is a chair in that corner and what it looks like, I just have the information stored in text not as a picture. Imagine a blueprint of a room. That's all the visualization I have. Colors, textures, and shapes are all stored as words. This becomes increasingly interesting when you're bilingual and some concepts in your head are stored in two different languages. Same with faces. I'd probably be able to get a vague picture of each particular facial feature, but simply because I have adjectives connected to them. Like, I know my partner's face can be described as slim, oval etc. But even if I get a sketch of all those elements I can never put them together to form a full picture of the face. I can't imagine how difficult and different being an artist must be. I myself am a writer and my condition paradoxically helps with that. My whole world-view is stored in words and vibes, so putting that into a story format is probably easier for me than for most mortals :D Thanks for this video. I feel seen <3

Cool! I'm on the opposite side, I have a vivid imagination, but I do think my mum might have this. And having a vivid imagination isn't always good either! Or instance, I can imagine how it would look like if there was something watching me outside my window. I know it's not there, but I kinda see it, I'm not good at explaining. And then I get scared and paranoid because I listen to too many readings of reddit horror stories! 😅 Edit to add: Except for the fact I have trouble forcing an exact image. My mind decides the details. Also, sorry this is so long...! 😅

Thank you for this!! I had a hard time understanding what aphantasia meant lol Breaking ot down really helps!! :7 Also whats wrong with Pressure :( (joke)

It's alright dear! Take your time and do what you're comfortable with. We don't mind the wait🙃

Murder Drones fan? :0

Spooky month fan spotted?

I see potential in you, looking forward to your journey on RUclips.

i normally see something like 1 or 2, but every now and then there's an object that is a complete 5. no shapes, no color, maybe a vague idea of what it's not. it's like the anti-meme "i know it's not round and i know it's not here". but even for the stuff i can visualize i can't describe it for sh*t. also you forgot to tell us to open our eyes, and i'm ashamed to admit this but i broke almost as soon as the activity was over.

I haven't watched the whole video yet but just listening to the beginning where you're explaining what you can see, and it's nice knowing other people also can't make images in their head, or can only get random vague images, I've tried talking to people about it in my family but no one really gets what I'm saying

Gacha creator here, I feel like there is a place for Gacha content to explore other topics but in no way should it be near sexual assault, rape, etc. Your takes are fucking amazing! I was exposed to Gacha heat content as a kid and while it didn’t fuck me up as bad as other people, it did introduce me to a very inappropriate world that I thankfully avoided. The community is somewhat older nowadays and my biggest issue is when content creators put in no warning on their videos.

help- i was in the middle of a gacha mini movie when I saw this. I stopped everything to watch it- ANYWAYSS love the vid and ur png avater thingy :3

As traumatizing as it was, it's undeniable how many memories and fun moments were created through out the time line of the community. Especially MEP collaborations, fanmade MVs bla bla bla etc. I loved it so much, it does hurt me to see how toxic its grown since its something that we all grew up with as a child/teen

The Gacha heat messed me up a lot but I guess I’m fine now..

As a gachatuber, i agree.

As a Gacha Vtuber I would like to say that majority of people in this community are genuinely some of the most rude, neglectful, awful people in my life. These people are still toxic af, and I literally have almost no hope in this community, while there are some really nice people in the community... Yes, some of these people have genuinely ruined my life, these people have low-key spread misinformation about me, started harassing me on social media, threatening me and calling me a creep and desperate over a friend request on discord. 💀💀 My life is literally in pieces because after I said a harmless joke to some random gachatuber and after which I got severely harassed which was fine as it was in the social media world, until these people starting DMing my actual family members and friends accusing me of all sorts of crimes. If you wanna escape reality definitely don't join the Gacha community. Everyone here is a mentally unstable imbecile with a huge ego and think because they're famous that means they're better and more powerful. In other words F the Gacha community.

Genuinely, thank you so much for making this video. I've been active with the app (and fandom) for years now and I resonate with this a lot, we were all just kids man. Kids who wanted to create something and got exposed to the worst type of individuals because of that naivety. I really hope you're doing better nowadays, no child needs to be exposed to hyper sexual content EVER. Sending love your way, and if anyone reading this comment is in the community, knows someone young who is, please, keep them/yourself safe. Goes for any fandom really, it's definitely not a problem exclusive to Gacha.

I was also a gacha vid. I got on the bl gacha series side which in EVERY SINGLE BL GACHA SERIES its always that omegaverse shit which without FAIL contained sa n 🍇every single time which was always romanticized. With stuff bein done to me irl back then I geinuenely thought it was normal n how you show love to someone. Kids brains are like playdough. Its still soft n can be molded n shaped however by WHOEVER. Its incredibly dangerous n the gacha community diff was a factor of it. This vid is pretty good on bringin light to that. Love this vid, cant wait to see more <:]

Note that there was inappropriate themes in Gacha life before like some adult chat rooms in the old chat feature and 4:15 this character is a reference to a problematic media

As a gachatuber and a minor- i honestly never realized or noticed. It was normal to me- i always knew the community was iffy, i think everybody should before joining, but... still

The algorithm sure did algorithmed me to this video. For reference, the only frame of reference to "Gacha" I have are "Gacha" live-service video games, meant to be technically free-to-play but in practice money-sinks that typically cater to/pander to a presumed straight male otaku/otaku-adjacent audience. I don't even know what the term "Gacha" means, nor where the term originated. (No seems to bother explaining when they use the term to refer to the aforementioned live-service video games.) So this all _very_ new to me. And also eerily similar to what I've only relatively recently learned about the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic fandom (a show I'd never seen but who's fandom's cultural osmosis caused it to come to my peripheral) being a fandom that has notoriously enabled and provided (and continues to enable and provide) safe harbor to some of its very large contingent of bad actors who are very literally not safe for kids.

omg i love commentary videos you grt a yippie vro

Gacha was my childhood but I left it around 3 years ago, thought I still watch some vids here and there.. Kid me discovered it through those "Dark side" glmv, dang does anyone remember those? Like most of the gacha kids back then, I was too exposed to those gross stuff, thinking it back it definitely had a impact on me, although I would argue today's gacha is somehow worse..?? (I won't go into details, I think most of you know) At least back then if we had one of those gross vids, three other vids would at least be decent/normal, today however most gacha content is toxic sh1t.. BUT it doesn't makes those older gross vids any less worse/traumatizing

Dude, I'm not going to hate on you for having an opinion, but Gacha Club is not like that. Lumine has learned from his mistakes, and made that content impossible to make.

Former Gachatuber here. I'll be fully honest, most of my issues ended up not forming because of the community, I barely interacted with it. It was mostly because of my mental health. I ended up making a react video for a fandom that was in a big boom due to the 2nd to last episode coming out in a day. I'm appreciative that the video did good, but I hate that it did *too* good. I felt holed into that one fandom and it eventually got to the point where I didn't want to make anything for a fandom I loved, because people wanted more videos. I'm definitely doing a lot better when it comes to youtube now that I've put Gacha well and behind me, but that almost year that lead me to coming close to deleting my channel many times was *a lot.* (Appologies for the long comment that honestly become more of a rant 😅)

As a person that is self considered as a Gacha tuber, I dislike the fandom very verrryyy much. I mainly use the app to get a base for what I want my ocs to look like. Many ppl in the community feel horrible about others in this community and what they are saying. I may be young, but I have been in the Gacha community almost all my life, and I’m very mature for my age, so I hope my comment on this subject can help others understand that many dislike what many are doing with this app and are trying to do their best to stop it.

Hello! Gacha tuber here who’s been in the community for a long while. I agree with everything you say. Our community is absolutely giant. Like really really big, so it’s no surprise that there are a lot of things that are… well… not child friendly. And I’m not just talking about p0rn, I’m talking about serious topics like SH abuse etc. I personally do not dip into topics I do not understand and have no right to talk about, but a lot of gachatubers (some of them even being way too young) make stories about those types of topics that are extremely serious. Horrifyingly, there have been lots of disgusting trends revolving around those things. I’m very sad that the Gacha community is shown as such a vile sick disgusting community, there are so many normal and AMAZING gachatubers, but things like ragebaiters ruin our whole image. The Gacha community is one of the most hated communities due to the explicit content, racism, serious topics, etc.

Gacha life was one of the reason I accidentally got a fetish for four years straight. Im trying to stop myself from being exposed to that media and its hard.

As a recovered gacha kid i can say that it is a dark place in my history that i will keep locked away in the chambers of my mind. I learn a lot of things, that 8 year old me shouldn't have learnt about from this chibi characters.

Oh my god im really excited to see more videos from you i think this actually a fucking amazing first video

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No offense but I think the gacha community needs jesus

As someone who’s been in the Gacha community for around 7 years now (and failing to break away from it), I think it’s right that I also share my thoughts on the community here Controversial is 100% the right word to describe the is community. If anything, it’s what frames the fandom, something we’re infamous for other than talented creators that we do hold. The thing about gacha is that it’s very “addicting”, to put it simply, something you can’t get out of. I know of many who had also had their fair share of watching more “vile” pieces of content made with Gacha , and not being able to stop doing so- possibly watching it for weeks on end- simply because of how consistent it is. The thing about Gacha, like with any other form of creative media, is that anything from other fandoms can be brought into this fandom. So, basically youtube brainrot x gacha = really, really bad stuff, especially for kids. With what the community is made out of, it’s simply to hard to reverse anything at this point (saying as the early days were quite literally built off of, gacha “heat” and romanticizing serious topics). The community right now is definitely at one of its lowest, saying as there’s a bunch of stuff going on with the development of the newest game , GL2 , but at this point I’m just waiting for the point we’re I can successfully break away. Thank you for making this video and spreading awareness about stuff in this community, genuinely. At this point, new users need to learn the culture and what mistakes were caused because of it, because if that doesn’t happen, this community is over.