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Im from a very conservative state..many people dont even know FTM transgenders exist. It is a taboo subject. I haven't come out yet (I'm in my senior year of highschool). I will go to a different city for uni next year.(im planning to atleast socially transition then) But im afraid professors and students will not accept me and continue to misgender me (as people are not really accepting in my country) Im also afraid of the early-transition phase.. Another option is to start seeing doctors for permission to get HRT ( it will take even longer here) right now. So that I'll have transitioned atleast a little bit more before i start a new life in a new city for uni next year as i said before..(this is more of a crazy option and I'll probably not have the guts to do it)

I would date a trans man.

Im a trans guy, rn i really, really don’t want to be trans, i felt this way at the beginning of my journey. I recently joined theater for the first time. Ive had a lot of fun, met a lot of new, amazing people. I have a dressing rehearsal soon, requiring Plain white shirts to be worn. It’s so damn simple, so simple. But it isn’t at the same time. I have a binder that still reveals a good bit of my chest (lgbtunicorns) and i wear hoodies to layer and cover my chest. Im worried im gonna have to drop out of the play, because there’s no way im gonna show up to my school, surrounded by deeply homophobic/transphobic peers, and stand on stage at practice with the body of a girl. I feel like nothing is going to help me.

This was such an honest, raw video. I struggle a lot with the fact that I've often (mostly) just wanted a cis body. It feels like there's a pressure nowadays to disavow dysphoria entirely (and I get why--it's wonderful to want to help people *not* feel bad about their bodies by normalizing difference, etc), but for me dysphoria is a huge and ongoing part of my trans experience. This is a big reason why, I think, I actually don't write a lot of trans male characters. I've been told by friends and CPs before that I should and felt pressure to, and I probably will write a trans male MC someday, but for me my transness enters my characters in different ways. I grew up freeform roleplaying with two of my childhood/teenage best friends and being able to play cis male characters was so freeing for me. It was absolutely both an escape from my body and a way for me to explore my gender identity. My fictional, written characters are, I think, fulfilling a similar role in way. It's frustrating, because so much support for trans writers is focused only on those of us who write trans protagonists (and that's obviously important and awesome), but I can't help but feel like if the support is intended for real trans people who exist in the world, it should also extend to trans (and queer) writers who don't. There's no right or wrong way to be trans, and thank you for sharing your experiences and thoughts. So much of what you said here resonated.

I think we are all in the same boat 😩. We are uncomfortable with everything because we can't achieve what we desire, that is to be a cis person of our inner gender 😢.

Good video :) Watching this after just passing 2 years on T! Easily the biggest moment of clarity I had was after my first male haircut at a barbers. I went in as nervous as one could get (with long hair and still using my birth name) and came out a different person knowing how right it was for me. I will be forever grateful to them for the experience I had that day and glad to have the memory as a defining moment in transition.

That's not how you apply it. You put a thin layer on. All in the instructions.

Did you have problems with sleep at night once taking this gel .thanks

crying about pronouns smells like privilege.

Love how deep your voice is now compared to the video I watched of you from 3 years back

Hi kris Just wanted yo say you're actually applying the gel wrong. It's the reason the gel gets a bad name in the TRT world. You're not supposed to rub it in the way you're doing, if it was a oil based transdermal yes but its ethanol based transdermal, so by rubbing it in you're actually evaporating the solvents that are meant to carry it through the skin. Iv been on this gel for eight years now and on 2 pumps I'm at 30/nmol pre application. Im with a private clinic so iv been able to learn how to apply the most efficiently using blood tests to confirm. The proper way to apply is to spread on thinly with the most minimal rubbing in as possible so it's still wet so the ethanol can do its thing..carry it through the skin. I use digital scales to pump out only half a gram (0.5g) at a time to spread it out thinly as possible in different sections(arm,shoulders). Total amount 2.5grams. Rubbing it in is probably why you need 4 pumps. Hope this helps MrT

Are you still on Reandron?

Sorry about the not-so-great relationship. U might know of Dr. Sigmund Freud's theory of penis envy, but HE claimed that ALL girls go through that. I do not buy that.

i’m going to go see dr graham as a 14 year old trans man. do you think he would prescribe me testosterone?

What happens if you stop in the middle of a cycle of gel?

Hey Kris, great to hear from you, I am in Queensland and just picked up my Testogel today! Can't wait, think I'll just do the 2 pumps per arm. Thanks mate ;-)

I'm a patient at the royal brisbane hospital and I had no clue they did gender services. Its insanely helpful to learn this stuff from you, thank you so much

My kids make it impossible for me to go 100% stealth. Everyone always wants to know what happened to their mother. Which is fine I like it when someone knows I'm a transman.

i know that this doesn't sound responsible, it for sure isn't i guess, but i was prescribed 50mg of testogel a week ago and since then ive been doing it 2 times a day, in the morning & in the evening. so i increased my dose from 50mg, as i was told to, to 100mg. i feel like i won't have enough testosterone for visible changes if i don't do so. is there maybe anyone that also did that? or that can tell me if its a bad idea and whats gonna happen? i planned on doing the higher dose for like 2 weeks or a month so i might get quicker changes in the beginning and then be able to be more patient when i go back to the prescribed dosis. i'm a very impatient person & i was desperate, that's why i started doing that. i could just stop it right now but i wanted to ask first if thats neccessary. thanks for any opinions or help in advance!

Thank you thank you

This is greasy

Did it give you your hair thickness back, or any changes?

Sorry I don't want to get something clear not trying to have a go at you but you've gone to female to male does it work?

I feel for you man just imagine going shopping in or Syria or Libya for that matter not to mention the new one of Ukraine. I really really hope that you are accepted in all these places that has been f***** over by?

*ladies.? Just trying to get on with everyone here and understand where people are coming from

Can you please explain exactly what you meant by that I'm a little bit confused maybe I was on the offensive defensive and I would just really like to know the details so that I can treat you guys fair

So you were saying that every now and then you would not be able to what not get it up get it up or you know do the guy hang what are you actually saying when you decided that you could not go through this stuff and that sex doesn't matter

Holy crap.... I'm on the verge of tears in Walmart right now. I'm only in a couple of months from cracking open my MtF journey. Thank you so much for making this. It's exactly how I feel. I just want this all to go away. I want to go back to being happy as a MaB. And I think I really was. I used my wife of over 10 years and my 4 kids as an anchor and loved that life. I just don't think it's possible to go back... I must speak with her and get help together. I could speak for much longer on this but I wanted to keep this brief. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I am so glad I found this page, I'm a fellow Aussie and its so hard to find Aussie experiences on here. Thanks for being so open and putting so much effort into your videos, I hope you're doing good :)

I am really unsure if i am a transguy or a girl.. the thing is i feel like i am not uncomfortable enough in my body to be trans ? And i dont wanna be trans.. i wish i would just be cis male or at least my mind be fine with being in a female body.... idk i feel so sensitive whenever this topic starts and even tho i already have a supporting bestie i feel like i al transphobic to myself... and i am scared that transitioning will be hard and i have always been told i am pretty and stuff and ik it sounds weird but what if i waste my female looks and what if i wouldnt even be pretty at all as a male? Like maybe thats a dumb concern but idkkkk

hello how many pump don all the gas bottle ?

aaaaa thank you for this, my first shot of Reandron is tomorrow (starting on shots cos of my PMDD and doc said it'd be the most consistent and least up and down) and I soooo needed this video right now, and it was so much more comforting hearing it from another Aussie too!

Hi there, do you have to wear packing underwear with it? Or do normal trunks work?

As a transmac thinking about going on T this was very interesting ! Thank you :)

Can you make an update vid for us!

I am extremely lucky that my manager is part of the LGBTQA+ community. She was beyond supportive of my decision and that helped me to feel more comfortable coming out to my co-supervisors and other personnel.

I enjoy my hair growth also. Nothing wrong with that.

Really happy for you

Mate this video was so well thought out, I'm very proud of you!

It was such an amazing day, magical and perfect! The entire event was filled with so much love for these two lovely people, I was so blessed to be there ^_^

I got to say I'm so glad I came across your videos Kris, you have made me feel much better about myself and my identity. Keep up the awesome bids man.

I do work out but I'm weirdly euphoric about having a bit of a gut. Don't need a 6-pack, a little tummy is fine with me! Do you pack with a regular jock strap or underwear with a packer pocket? If you safety-pinned the pocket closed idk how the packer could fall out.

Im so proud of you for your journey and how you take life one day at a time. You are amazing! (Missed you bud, sorry ive been gone so long, just followed you on Instagram)

Thanks for the review! My parents are both avid readers, so I've been on the hunt for a book I'll encourage them to read when I come out. I put this on hold at my library right away. It's been hard coming to grips with the fact that unless I write a book myself, no one will get a clear idea of my own journey. So, I just have to find decent depictions of trans masculine experiences.

I agree with you. I like the book a lot because it is a) a personal experience but b) also sets the experience in perspective and gives trans and cis people a lot of resources! :)

Hey mate, does it move around much if you do any exercise? I'm looking for something for martial arts.

Just had spinal fusion.. I feel you

You have become one of the oldies - love it 😊

Great video mate, thanks. I am tossing up, can't stand packers to be honest but I also know that that area is the first place eyeballs tend to look at so I wonder if something like this might be worth it. I wonder though, is it similar to most packers in that with pants on it just looks like you're trying to suppress a hard on?

Humm. My definition of man juice is something slightly different.