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i dont get why hes leaving me on read wth

the title sure is relatable. my (only) friend doesn't see anything wrong with me or how I stay silent most of the day my sister hits me and nobody notices, if someone did, they didn't do anything to stop her my parents are starting to involve me in things I don't want to be involved in (arguments, fights, competitions for something I'm really bad at) my brother gets mad at me for something I didn't do my little brother keeps saying I'm a terrible and self centered person (although I'm not) my teachers scold me for doodling although Kurt gets to do it without getting scolded I always think I'm the reason why people are negative (fighting, sad, angry, etc.) what did I even do..?

Im just hear bc the person looked like ashley graves from tcoaal

Even in bad times I keep a painful smile on my face. Why? Because Atleast you won’t worry people around you

I hope there's a chance for me. Thank you for the Cathartic noises, regardless.

The scariest thing for me to realize while listening to this playlist is not that I lost everyone and everything because of bad people and circumstances. On the contrary, I've always been the terrible one, it's scary to realize that it was YOU who was always unhealthy. I'm scared and I feel like I'm going to die soon.

Dear person whoever reads this, Hey, you, yes, I am talking right to you. I hope you will see yourself with the eyes I see you one day, because I can tell you have some awesome music taste :) You're such a beautiful human being and worth and enough. I hope you know that you do only need yourself to be happy, I know society build up the standard that whenever you're alone you're not living a happy live. But in fact that is not true, if you start to realize that you actually deserve all the good things happening to you, you will treat yourself a lot nicer. I hope you let yourself rest, don't beat yourself up over past mistakes, over regret, and over everything your mind wants to destroy you. I wish I could remove all those demons inside of your head because you deserve to feel happy. If you ever feel lonely then watch the sky, because you know, someone, at the same time is watching the sky too, maybe feeling the same way..I am glad you exist and I hope you won't ever remove your own spot in this world, maybe you don't feel like you belong here but, Angel, then build your home here. I don't want you to leave this world unhappy. I want you to live every little second, I want you to feel alive, I don't want you to see yourself just existing. You deserve it. Whatever happened, it's not your fault, the demons in your head recognize that you have a beautiful heart, they want to take it because they have never seen such beautiful heart as yours, so why let them win over you?. You're not selfish for isolating yourself, but you deserve to talk to someone. If you're reading this than please never forget to breath and smile. Don't live up to other standards! It's your story and not theirs. Life for those who couldn't, smile for those who forgot what a genuine smile is, love like there's no other, hug like it’s your last one. I love you and send you hugs. You're so strong, you're still here, and I am proud of you. YOU ARE NOT USELESS. READ THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE WORTH IT. READ THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE LOVED. READ THAT AGAIN. I AM GLAD YOU EXIST. READ THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE NOT A PROBLEM. YOU ARE HUMAN AND YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID. READ THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE NOT BEING DRAMATIC. You're not a burden to anyone, don't be afraid to talk, to use your voice. You're beautiful inside out. Your body is beautiful the way it is. Please don't starve yourself. Please eat, I know it's hard but you deserve food. You deserve to eat and drink. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. READ THAT AGAIN. I WISH I COULD HUGH YOU RIGHT NOW, SO A VIRTUAL HUG WILL DO. It hurts me to see you're in pain : ( you deserve so much man, don't let your emotions control you. Don't let them get the best of you. I am sorry that no one is hearing you, I am sorry no one is noticing that you have lost yourself. I wish I could take your pain away, it hurts me to see the pain in your eyes. I love you trough my words and I mean it. I just want you to stay, hold on a little longer okay? Please? For me.?? I hope you have an awesome day/ morning/ evening/ night. If it's night for you, go to sleep, I know it's hard to fall asleep right now but you deserve a good sleep. If you have nightmares, please, don't let them fight you. If it's day for you, don't start it by such sad music, I know it's impossible to have a good day with such mindset but take baby steps, start by drinking two cups of water in the morning and so on.. You will start building little healthy habits. It's evening for you, you re probably overwhelmed and stressed, I want you to know it's okay to feel the way you feel. You don't need to be scared, of course you're overwhelmed or stressed, I mean who wouldn't? But it's important to know that when you feel that way you should do a little self care, such as taking a bath for example? You deserve to feel at ease and relaxed. And if you are somewhere in between I hope you know that you're stronger than you think, I know you will make it :) Now wipe those tears away and smile for me, you really don't know much a smile can brighten someone's day, do you? I hope one day yours will become a genuine one where you don't need to fake it anymore, because I can't say this enough, you deserve a good smile and to feel alive. You're worth more than every fucking cent in this world. Remember crying is not weakness, let it out as much as vou can but don't let the emotion control you by giving up. It's okay, you're here, you're safe, you can let it out. Did anyone asked you, how you are feeling today? If not, how are you really? I don't think you're doing good, but you will feel good at one point. Don't give yourself up. I am sorry you feel misunderstood. But anyone who gets to be with you, doesn't know how fucking lucky he/ she/ they is :). Enough with beating up yourself for today, okay?! - The stranger that cares about you more than anything. I hope this is enough for you to stay today, tomorrow will be a new day, a new start, let go now. I hope you can stay. This is your sign to stay and treat yourself with love, you deserve it. And in case no one told you today, again, I am so proud of you. I hope you will remember my words :> (ps someone else has said this! i just wanted to spread the word, you are loved <3)

I'm just here to listen to music, is everyone good here..?

I'm the favorite child in my family, but I don't feel like the favorite. I feel like the last one to pick at dogeball and barely told anything.

The picture looks like my friend trying to comfort me but I just walk away from her and now she is my girlfriend and she still wants me to be happy but I can’t 8:32 this is the last time you hear from me OSピー腹ピー

i have nothing left to live for.

w music

F Akira Toriyama

It's funny how strangers on the Internet comfort you better than people who should comfort you

I'm going insane

Weird, im Weird, im sick and tired of being here and being alive i just want to end it but im scared so im a scaredy cat. im weird cause i run on all fours, im just born weird! i cry cause im a crybaby, i want to hurt myself but im SCARED im so fucking scared. i cant deal with this, i cant be normal like the others. No one understands my pain. NO ONE. im sick and tired, im stressed out and im crying, Leave me alone. Im Tired.

Others are not supposed to care

Just thuggin that shi out 🗣🔥🔥🔥

Here you have all the songs you will listen whit their lyrics. Have fun singing. :) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ young vacations 0:00-3:10 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Another day goes by And where was I? Didn't think I'd still be here Just to make things clear What's the use? I'm not talking sense Call it a ruse On myself I wanted to go I wanted to say All things come to pass With time But I want everything now To be all mine You think it's all over Get up and try again You've got to act your age, darling Before you fall back in What's the use? I'm not talking sense Call it a ruse On myself I wanted to go I wanted to say All things come to pass With time But I want everything now To be all mine ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ twin cabins - swing lynn 3:10-8:32 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Hey there little honey, won't you groove? I've been trying all night to dance with you Hey there little lonely, won't you stay? I said, "I would rather die than feel this pain" You said, "I know, I feel very much the same But I'm afraid that I don't know, knowing is not my thing" But I would like to dance with you Awkwardly in haze To this little tune I said, "Hey there little honey, won't you groove? I've been trying all night to dance with you" I said, "Hey there little honey, won't you stay?" I said, "I would rather die than feel this pain" You said, "I know, I feel very much the same But I'm afraid that I don't know, knowing is not my thing" But I'm sure, I want to be with you Awkwardly in haze To our little tune Well if you are sure Well I know I'm sure Well if you are sure Well I know I'm sure Well if you are sure Well I know I'm sure Well if you are sure Well I know I'm sure Well if you are sure Well I know I'm sure Well if you are sure Well I know I'm sure Well if you are sure... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ radiohead - no surprises 8:32-12:19 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ A heart that's full up like a landfill A job that slowly kills you Bruises that won't heal You look so tired, unhappy Bring down the government They don't, they don't speak for us I'll take a quiet life A handshake of carbon monoxide And no alarms and no surprises No alarms and no surprises No alarms and no surprises Silent, silent This is my final fit My final bellyache with No alarms and no surprises No alarms and no surprises No alarms and no surprises, please Such a pretty house And such a pretty garden No alarms and no surprises (get me out of here) No alarms and no surprises (get me out of here) No alarms and no surprises, please (get me out of here) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ bo burnham - goodbye 12:19-16:29 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ So long, goodbye I'll see you when I see you You can pick the street I'll meet you on the other side So long, goodbye Do I really have to finish? Do returns always diminish? Did I say that right? Does anybody want to joke when no one's laughing in the background? So this is how it ends I promise to never go outside again So long, bye! I'm slowly losing power Has it only been an hour? No, that can't be right So long, goodbye Hey, here's a fun idea How 'bout I sit on the couch and I watch you next time? I wanna hear you tell a joke when no one's laughing in the background So this is how it ends I promise to never go outside again Am I going crazy? Would I even know? Am I right back where I started fourteen years ago? Wanna guess the ending? If it ever does I swear to God that all I've ever wanted was A little bit of everything, all of the time A bit of everything, all of the time Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime I'm finished playing, and I'm staying inside If I wake up in a house that's full of smoke I'll panic, so call me up and tell me a joke When I'm fully irrelevant and totally broken, damn it Call me up and tell me a joke Oh, shit, you're really joking at a time like this? Well, well, look who's inside again Went out to look for a reason to hide again Well, well, buddy, you found it Now come out with your hands up We've got you surrounded

this reminds me on Buddhism because I been through all of this and still am as it never leaves your life but I learned to be able to walk through the pain and it's effects are becoming less and less. So never give up and you can achieve anything you want even if everyone pushes you down. You have full control but it's painful AF to use. Trust me, you're strong enough to get through anything.

Heh. the title is so relatable right now. Are you bored because you're mentally unstable? Or are you mentally unstable because you're bored? I'm over here going on a discord server I interact with heavily, basically asking for help. But how will anyone help me online? It's a discord server dedicated to a small RUclipsr. I can't sleep at all it seems like. And when I do it's only for a short amount of time, and when I wake up to check my phone there's nothing other than youtube notifications about a new video and annoying emails. I have 2 roleplay partners. One of them is unable to reply till night. And lately I've been losing motivation even though i love the roleplay we currently have. The second one has given me the best roleplay in existence. We have two roleplays of different AU's we both wish could've happened for our two favorite characters from an anime. But they are extremely busy, they are an adult and have work to do. Sometimes it'll take months for one reply. My mother is a narcissist. My dad is emotionally unavailable. My cousins don't reach out to me on their own, I have to reach out to them. I don't go to school, I was taken out of the system by my mom out of fear of getting "the state on us" as she says it. I have a therapist, psychiatrist and a case worker from YOUTH SERVICES. and what have they done? Nothing. I vented once to my psychiatrist out of desperation. I wrongfully got sent to a mental hospital over intrusive thoughts. I was forced to strip naked in front of 2 staff members just to make a "body map" as they called it. My mom openly doesn't care if I kill myself. She doesn't care about my mental health. She told me to kill myself recently if I want to do it so bad. She threatened to strangle me too after I told her how I felt. I want to die. But I'm too afraid to follow through. I want help but I'm too tired to even try to get it. What has "help" done for me? It's done nothing but made me worse. I have 2 lovely cats and i don't want to leave them. It broke me to leave them for just a week when I went to the mental hospital. I cried out for my mama in there. Even though she has mentally abused me for many years. I have no one. I try to get comfort from my damn cats, music and roleplay. I try to contact my adult cousin who says she would always be there for me. And yet she hasn't contacted me in over 2 weeks. We haven't had a real conversation since last year. I'm so tired. I'm so incredibly tired. Can't I just be young, ignorant and dumb again?

Im fine I hope

No I'm good, what are you talking about, I'm not feeling depressed for a while, I don't know what you are talking about

What the art

Depression first hit me when I was 10 and In middle school. Shit was so hard for me, I had no friends and got jumped constantly. Then when I switched schools I meet Emily. She was a wonder and she picked me up out of the gutter. When I met Emily I was the most depressed I had been at the time. I just moved schools and knew no one agin. Then she came out of nowhere one recess and we became friends. My depression finally was getting better! For the first time I had a friend in school and I was able to be myself again. She has no idea how much she actually helped though. She helped me be more social and even helped me stop self harming (I didn’t realize I was at the time). Then Covid hit and we had to go our separate ways. Even though we only had 8 months together she helped me more than she knows. Before Covid she gave me this little backpack charm like the ones you put on key chains. I doubt she even remembers that, but I still have it. It’s still on my bag today and it’s how I remember that time. I never got to tell her how much she meant to me and she’ll never get to understand how much she actually helped me. Now that been 4 years past then my depression is getting back to me and she’s back. Like an angel she came back when it started getting worse again. But this time I can’t talk to her, it’s like a wall is between us. I share a school and buss with her but whenever I try to talk to her it’s dry like she holds info back. I tried to connect with her again but it just never goes the way I hope. That’s fine though I guess. I understand she changes and it’s been 4 years but it still hurts. I just wish above all else that I could tell her just what she did and give her one last hug.

i know its getting worse but i cant stop it because it started when i was born and i cant let myself die

No matter how bad you hurt a person. You have to allow yourself room for improvement. The only way to become a good person is to give up on getting even. Give up your dept. Even if you did that awful thing yesterday.

My family doesn't care.. And who irl will even? Even if I will mess it all up again idk why I'm still here

Im not gonna make it bros.

That is a lie.

“But no body cares.” Wrong, someone cares about you, be it someone you love and care for, or be it someone random on the internet. You are cared and loved for.

i don't know that i can call my friends: friends becouse today we have party in school they said to put some music for me and my gf i don't know how to dance i think they do it for good reason but i don't like what happend today About this music i realy love it :)

I just want... A friend

i wish someone looked at me that way

Im just fucked. Fucked up, possibly. But mostly fucked. Cooked beyond belief. Absolutely fucked. It's all fine though.

Life will change,i think maybe i'm a little optimistic about things but i hope everyone who need help will receive it.

Thanks for the playlist, but anyway I don't know, just thanks

Life is bad

manga name?

Seems everything is becoming more lonely due to losing everyone around me after turning 18 and I’m now 19 both my parents are gone just recently lost my dad and most my family seem to not care about me after his passing and my family on my mother side seem to not care about me anymore now that I’m older after losing my gf I also lost all of my friends and i realized that when I tried seeking help when I was on the verge of suicide and had a few failures and no one wanted to some see or talk to me I now only have one friend and one person who truly cares about me which is my aunty

Haven’t heard young vacations is so long lfg

I feel so useless, like a burden, I lost my friends, I keep ruining my relationship.. I'm not so close to family, sometimes I really wanna end it all and I end up relapsing, I need to feel something Anything, pain, drugs, alcohol...anything to distract me

I dunno. I’m fine, I think. Things have gotten SO much better. I feel alive. But I come home and it’s all sad. It feels like im a burden to everyone in my family. My younger brother constantly makes fun of me, maybe I’m sensitive. My dad, is there but he’s absent. And my mom has so much on her plate, that I feel bad. I can’t tell her much of my problems cause my brother always makes fun of me for them. I don’t know why I’m sad every weekend. Maybe cause I’ve found comfort in my school. I dunno.

Can anyone.. just reply?.. just for fun

just came home put this on and found out that my great grandfather died,

atleast yt coments are nice

MAY OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR JESUS CHRIST BLESS YOU ALL, Matthew 11:28-30 NRSVue 28“Come to me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” IF IT IS HARD FOR YOU, ACCEPT JESUS, YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE BY DOING THIS ONLY WIN AMEN

Pills not working as much as they used to. I started to have existential crisises, ocd self destructive ideas time to time again. Its not fun.

I tell myself that I wouldn't laugh and I failed by watching memes

If you are going through something that wants you to commit suicide, there's always someone for you, trust me. Now listen and read this affirmation "You are loved just for being who you are, just for existing" ILY