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I have felt the same way.... I actually missed my breast after losing so much weight surgery 😆. I am 3 years maybe 4 and it's frustrating but I appreciate the safety net I really need it.

You are the cutest!

I used food as an emotional crutch, and I grew up poor so we cleaned our plates and didn't waste food. Working through this with a therapist helped me. I'd get frustrated, especially when I was stressed, or in social settings, that it was so obvious (I thought) that I had weight loss surgery because I could not eat. I wouldn't say mine was a food addiction, but for some people it is. Sometimes I just wanted to be "back to normal" for a few days. Remind yourself of the positives in how much better you feel, and how much that binging made you hurt. I hated therapy in a lot of ways (I trained to be a counselor, and I don't agree with a lot of common techniques), but in hindsight, it did help with my relationship with food. Our society is obsessed with food if you think about it. Every single holiday involves a feast or a cookout, and we can't participate fully. You socialize and go to a restaurant, it's annoying to be full after the appetizer and have to ask the server for a to go box ("Is there something wrong with your meal?", (in my head, no I had VSG) "No I'm just not hungry")- always making excuses in social settings if you don't want everyone knowing your personal business. Holidays are hard, gatherings are hard, restaurants are hard. Special holiday recipes that I can't tolerate anymore (I get dumping syndrome from my sleeve yet not as severely as the RNY crowd 🙄 hooray). Order food that you know will reheat well, to go boxes and leftovers will become your friends if you didn't like them before. Order off the kids menu if it's healthy. Know people aren't really paying as much attention to your eating habits as you may think they are (how much are you monitoring what everyone else around you is eating, probably not much, unless you live with them). So much socializing also involves food, but you shouldn't become a hermit like I did (secretive eating is one of my problems too, I used to have mild bulimia and felt ashamed if people saw me eat, "Why is the fat girl eating?" I'd say in my head). Remember the benefits to your life make this surgery so worth it, I still don't regret mine for a single day, even though it's made for plenty of awkward moments and frustration. The weird noises my stomach makes are so embarrassing, but I try to have a sense of humor about it (that was the chair that made that noise 👀). Therapy helps so you think about it differently, and also recognizing "head hunger" ( I miss eating, I'm bored so I want to eat), versus real hunger (my blood sugar is low, my body needs nutrients, therefore I need food). Good luck!

Hi Allie, found your page! How are you doing?

Good video I'm getting the surgery soon I'm nervous nurse says I'll have drains and a Foley not sure what that is?

OMG! You have the same bedding set that I have purple with the white flowers all over it oh my gosh I love this set!! You are the only one with all the videos I've watched that has this this set. Obviously you have great taste....😄

Allie.... been thinking about you. How are you?

How have you been? Thinking about you and I hope all is well... Please update us!

I'm scared to have the surgery but if I don't I'm will die within the next 10 years I'm not afraid of the actual surgery I'm afraid of the aftermath of it

your so right

Thank you for your honesty Allie. I hope your bad days are fewer and fewer.

Miss seeing you. I pray that everything is well. God Bless you.

❤❤

Hope all is well with you. Missing your videos

Hi can you please subscribe to my channel I subscribe to your channel today thanks let’s help each other thanks

So so sorry you’re going through this. I’m hoping and praying for better for you.

God just wanted me to see this video. I’m getting my surgery on Wednesday with Dr Billing as well. I’m so scared. I cancelled once already. But I don’t want to keep carrying all this weight around anymore. Subscribing

What is VSG?

So glad you updated us , I was worried about you, cheer up buttercup :) prayers !

Just subbed to your channel! Hope you'll come check out mine! My first SF box should be here by the end of the month! I'm so excited! Great video! ❤

Amen Sister!!! XOXOXO

Glad you did an update. Sorry things aren’t going well. Hope they turn around soon. I love your channel. I’m herefor the long haul.

You are one of my RUclips favs... Shit is real. If you ever need to talk, I am here.

OMG our surgery dates are exactly the same day only a year apart. I live in Spokane Washington. GO. HAWKS!!!

I watched a video from Dr Eric burg today on utube and I thought of u he was talking about how when u do keto the cancer can't live off keto it is fed by carbs

Seattle Seahawks are my boys

I'm new to your channel. You are soo cute and funny. Excited to follow you on your journey. My WLS is scheduled for December 13th and I am super nervous. I don't want to fail. XOXOXO

👍👍Happy Monday...😘😘😘

Allie please update , sending love and prayers!

I wash cold gentle setting and hang dry. Works fine usually.

Hope your doing Ok Allie! Miss hearing about your thoughts!

I am so into subscription boxes right now, and love your clothing videos.

I ordered boxes from Dia and fromStitch Fix. I got one today and filmed my unboxing. I wish I knew my opinions the way you do. I kept a couple of pieces and waiting on the next box. Just subbed to your channel. I'm on a weight loss journey too. I don't hand wash, but I do Dryel in the dryer. Definitely love that dress!!!!! More videos on clothes please!!!!

No to the hand washing ! you made me lol, so funny : }

Your story is so inspirational! I said a prayer for you!

some videos on my channel it may helps

It is a lot to go through. Doesn't have to be a death sentence(not for a long time anyway). Praying for you and family. I am a breast cancer survivor. Health insurance is crazy. Contact Cancer Society, seek out local organizations that might help( I.e. here we have My Sister's Keeper), check with the drug co that makes your meds-sometimes they will reduce prices or offer it free depending on financial situation. Sending you positive uplifting thoughts 💛

I like that- judge yourself by yourself- that is how it should be. 76lbs in 6 months, think about it, that's amazing! Embrace it and use it as incentive to keep going. Work on planning some things you do-it makes life less frenzied and feels good to ' get things done' Welcome back!😄

I'm so sorry u are going through this! I can't imagine. I hate the way the insurance screws people so often. I'm glad u will be able to get ur medication!

Hi I am just starting my journey and trying to get approved. I love ur videos and am routing for your success! I can't wait to see u suceed!

Whether you live or die it must be in CHRIST JESUS. It will not be luck or lucky crystals or stones, only the power of Jesus. Cry out to the Lord for your healing not just for physical healing , but for spiritual healing. Healing in your mind body and soul. I speak life in you, In JESUS' NAME! I LOVE YOU MY DEAR...GOD BLESS YOU! I'M PRAYING FOR YOU!

Your subscription box videos are so fun!! You got some great stuff from Stitch Fix! I do think it is challenging to find clothes to fit when you're on the lower end of the 5 foot scale...I'm 5'4". I'm waiting on my next box from them. I've also had good luck with Wantable and Trunk Club.

Hi Allie. I stumbled upon your video and just wanted to say I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with worrying about how to pay for meds you need on top of dealing with the reality of brain cancer. The whole situation sucks and you shouldn't have to deal with any of it. I wish I could swoop in and buy all your meds for you. But since I can't, just know that some random stranger out on the internet is listening if you ever need to vent. Hugs and wishes for the best for you.

hi Allie, in the middle of watching your video I had to pause it and pray for you, and I will continue praying for you. I too have had three different types of cancer since 2011. I did not have insurance I had a a longtime boyfriend but I refuse to get married just to have insurance, so I decided to search for different alternatives. there is programs out there called Indigent care and charity care. I really strongly urge you to look into these programs my surgeries medications trips to the doctor we're all free 100% free because doctor sign up to help out people who don't have the money or the insurance to have these procedures and medications in their life. So Indigent care and charity care through Shands Hospital as where I went but I'm sure there's something similar like that where you are living or you're about to be going to live I ordered you to look into programs like this because they did save my life. Right now I am cancer-free and have been since 2015. I really hope and pray that you find a solution to where it doesn't drain your bank account so much so that you can't even live on the Necessities that you need in life like food and utilities and internet and phones and you know the things that people need car payments stuff like that. I'm really sorry that you are going through this my heart aches for you. But you are not alone there are people out here listening to your story and people out here that have and have had gone through the same things that you're going through. Keep your thoughts positive always I know it's hard but it helps have people around you that bring you up and lift you up that drag you out of the house and you really don't want to go out and bring life back into you this is a necessity because if you get down all the time you will not want to get back up and fight and you my girl have to fight to live. I don't know if you believe in God but to each their own I do so I will continue to pray for you but just know that you're not the only one out there that are going through these struggles I did and I came out through the other side and I strongly believe that if you look up these types of programs you can find something until help you assist in your medication and your procedures and your doctor visits. I just thought I'd reach out and let just let you know about my story and how I went about getting help that I needed when I did not have Medicaid because my long-term boyfriend that we live together and that are now married made too much or Medicare because he made too much. so I get it continue the fight there is a light at the end of the tunnel keep fighting and I will be praying for you God bless and have a great day I hope you feel better

Hi Allie. Look into financial assistance programs the pharmaceutical companies that produce your meds may have. Also look for coupons for the specific meds. I have a high deductible that includes meds and I use coupons for several high cost drugs because it takes so long to meet the deductible. It makes a big difference. Several years ago I needed a really high cost injectable drug for RA . This class of drugs was excluded from my insurance. The company that produces the drug has a program for people that have low or no insurance coverage. They supplied me with the medication for the cost of shipping. It won't hurt to take a look and see if there is anything available for your meds. The worst that can happen is you find there is nothing available for you. But you may find there is. Good luck and best wishes.

Oh Allie, I'm so sorry everything is coming down on you. Just from your videos I know you are strong. I have to break down and let it all out to be okay too! You will find a way to make this work. If u have to ask for help ask for it. We all need to at times. I really hate cancer and wish there was anyway I could take away some of your worries and hurt. I am here if u want to chat. Like I said sister send me a friend request. We could all use more people in our corner toots. P.s I could never tell u wore a hair piece and I wouldn't of known u didn't have it on. 😉 Thank you for sharing your raw emotions with us. I hope letting it out helps. 😘❤️😘

I'm sad that your moving, but I truly hope it allows you to get better care. I'm so sorry to hear about your medical. I'm only 37 but I'm on disability so only get medicare/medicaid. Medicaid is a lifesaver compared to medicare, and they are always trying to get rid of medicaid. I think it's terrible that they took this away from you. I really hope you are able to get things better for you. Thoughts and prayers go out for you.

I want this surgery so bad but I'm scared of what happens long term. you're so brave!

I drink wine with frozen grapes too...Delish❤. Hope everything works out for you!!! I also subscribed to your channel.

That really does suck 🙁 I'm so sorry you're going though this. I'll be praying for you.