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Yeh

Thank you.

That would be a very large family tree. It would definitely have to be separate families, the same way we would come up with a taxonomical tree for different animals.

@@StormyTalks definitely. There is a lot more to gender and gender identity than most people realize

Yes!

also how i could experience the same trauma as you (ie neglect) but i process it different and i reject relationships while you try to make as many as you can. i like your example :3

Very true. I remember someone clarified this notion when I was trying to figure out differences between ilyagender and péra(gender) and how the two related to the overall outherine experience. Turns out, sometimes it's just a small preference in how something is worded or how the term itself sounds. This video was recorded a few months ago so this was before I was getting really deep into abinary gendered concepts. I would have loved to include the part where it might just be preference and nothing else.

I didn't mention that any of these are a way to reflect one's personality and if that's something that you assume about someone's experience with gender, I suggest reaching out and making the effort to understand where other people coming from. The "taking things too seriously" is a really weird reach. People have subjective experiences with a number of identity aspects and sometimes, we want to be able to celebrate that. Your argument is just another flavor of the conservative "there are only two genders" narrative.

​@@StormyTalks Do you mind explaining how a gender identity is different from any other identity? My understanding is that gender is related to the socially defined characteristics of sex in some way, whereas an identity such as jazz musician is not. I'm not sure if you concider all genders as valid or not, but there are certainly many people who label themselves with genders that are unrelated to sex in any way. As for the "seriousness" of genders, I'm mostly trying to highlight the distinction between a label with a clear unambiguous understanding (man, woman, nonbinary etc), and a label which is characterized by each individuals personal interpretation of what it means. I just don't really see the utility of that as universal label. I don't strongly believe there's a negative affect of having them, I will just likely never understand.

Nobody ever questions the validity or utility of other ambiguous identity labels. It only ever seems that gender gets all the scrutiny. It gets tiring having to defend my personhood. But I get it. I'm some nobody on the internet who you only see through these videos and you will never see any other aspect of my life. To you, I exist in the figurative sense. I am someone to debate and to be reduced to concepts. You don't and never will see my personhood because where's the fun in that when you can just pick apart my existence and then call it a day? After doing so, you don't care how I feel once I log off and get on with my life. You so badly want me to be simple, for my identity to be concise and inflexible. Gender is a social status used as a way to either conform to sex or to subvert it. Not everyone will be a gender that even alludes to one's relationship to their sex. There was once a baseline for gender and then we realized that there's so much more to it. Sex lost its intrinsic relevance to gender, though some people may still consider their sex and their gender to be one in the same. It's still included when talking about gender, but one's physiology can't be the only way to talk about gender because human just aren't that simple. Gender for some might be simple, but it's a lot more complicated for others. This isn't to say that gender is automatically the _voluntary_ subversion of societal expectation. Some people just don't vibe with certain constraints and that should be okay. It should be okay to say "That box doesn't feel right" without their validity being questioned. And you really can't blame someone for seeing the boxes you create and not want anything to do with them. Yes, even seeing gender as only man, woman, and nonbinary is still restrictive. There's really nothing wrong with giving a name to these experiences, to our relationship with the binary or with gender as a whole or with concepts like nonbinary or abinary. If I simply said "I am nonbinary" then, sure, that is entirely true. But what does that _mean_? Your assumption might be that I'm not a man or a woman, which is not correct. And your assumption might be that someone who is not a man or a woman is genderless, which is also not correct. That's what the clarification is for. "I am a nonbinary man." Also entirely true, and also there's even more to it. I could do this until I get down to the very miniscule building blocks that make up my gender, which would involve very many labels to describe it. So, simplifying gender just so you feel better about yourself is not the way to go. If I say "I am nonbinary", you're failing to see about 90% of what makes my gender what it is. That's what's happening when you expect everyone else to only stick to a few labels, for your comfort. Humans are complex. You can define a human in no more than two sentences, but you cannot define their personhood in so few words.

Your question shouldn't be "Why aren't people identifying with these historically prevalent but nebulous concepts we invented?" It should be "How are these nebulous concepts harming those who are being forced to identify with them?"

​​​​​@@StormyTalksAlright can you tell me a gender that falls outside these enough to require a name Man, Woman, Non-Binary (neither of the two), Gender-Fluid (Any combination of the others either costant or changing), Also gender IS inherently tied to sex and peoples perception of it, not everything needs to be expressed through genders tldr: Do not atribute to gender what can be explained by preference or sexuality Edit: That little rant you went on is guilt tripping of the highest caliber no one attacked you personaly you expressed your ideas publicaly there will be people that disagree

It's so weird seeing how a video might blow up. Sometimes the views blow up while sometimes it's the comment section. I never understood how that even works. I want to do my best to be informative and inclusive. The trolls don't bother me as much as they used to because in the end, the joke is on them because they don't know who I am outside of what I do here. They are seeing a curated version of myself who only posts videos about gender and are making weird assumptions based solely on that. It makes them look stupid.

I think you're missing the part where a lot of labels are umbrella terms for more specific experiences.

Jesus christ get off your high horse and get a bit of respect for fellow queers. There's no need for in-fighting.

No, it is transphobic. You're being transphobic because people don't experience the same exact thing you do.

u just used the biggest transphobic remark and said "this isn't to be transphobic" like, wow. disrespectful to ppl who have genuinely seperate experiences.

Not to be transphobic but * proceeds to be transphobic *

My genders are in fact special and quirky and I think that's pretty cool of me actually 😙✨ and every time you complain I'll make more

That's really nice of you. Thank you!

Huh, interesting!

Well, quite a lot of programmers are trans/non-binary and among those who are most active online (where many of these labels are coined and discussed); we queer programmers are probably an even larger percentage than the general population, so it's not really a surprise if these labels are inspired by programming terms.

I suppose that is true. But it's nice to have a name for one's experience.

Go to a paint shop and you'll find that indeed all of those have different names.

Yeah, I don't think they realized that just about every color in every shade and every hue has a name and if it doesn't, we make up a name to fill that gap.

@@angelorfeven the ones that look near the same, do have different names! This analogy is a pretty good one ngl.

​@@angelorfyeah isn't that the paint section at Lowe's or Home Depot with all the color swatch cards? Honestly I love that visual as a metaphor for xenogenders or gender in general lol. Like someone could say they're red. But they ccould also say they're vampiric maroon~ Why do people hate self expression lmao

A lot of things are a social construct, but that doesn't make it any less important to people. But you got the right idea. "Stargender or whatever" feels very reductive though.

@@StormyTalks reductive to what?

@qwbanana I'm not sure if reductive was the right word but the "or whatever" part just sounds like you don't really understand the experience or that you don't see it as anything to take seriously.

@@StormyTalkssry i just append whatever to all of my sentences, probably should stop as it makes me look flippant/not take thing seriously when that wasn't my intention

You could just watch the video for the answer. Or don't comment at all.

actually, everything is made up. this is why synonyms, homonyms and homophones exist. every aspect of language and society is made up.

​@@imlimpoism9260 Yeah exactly

@imlimpoism9260 Exactly! And being made up doesn't make it any less real or important to someone.

​@@StormyTalks yea, you're right. it makes it more real if it WAS made up, because then there's a reason behind it, a story and character. everyone is unique.

@@matissecaron9076 Thank you. I think I had forgotten to update what I wrote down.

It makes a lot of sense to me, and thank you for sharing! People have different experiences. I've always said that if you asked 100 people what their gender experience is like, you'd get 101 answers. Thank you very much for the kind comment! You will get to be a fun trans grandpa and you'll get to tell amazing stories about cats and how they feel integral to your identity. Your grandkids will be inspired and in turn, they might make some interesting discoveries about themselves.

I honestly don't know how to help but I hope someone has some good suggestions!

Correct.

It still wouldn't be inclusive. The best thing to do is throw the whole idea out.

I'm glad it was helpful! It's nice to have options.

It is!

I'm glad it came across! I think sometimes I forget certain details or I ramble on in a way that's a bit disorganized. I'm still working on being more structured!

@@StormyTalks its a tad unorganized but my meds have worn off and i wouldntve learned anything if it was more structured lol youve got a good personality n ill def be watching more of your stuff in the future :)

Oh wow, thank you!

Cool!

Sorry I wish I only did this comment and this one first

It's okay!

You replied really quickly I love it and what time is it where you are

When I replied to you, I think it was around midnight. I typically reply quickly but even if I don't, I still reply eventually. I reply to every comment.

Very nice. I can relate to neutromme myself but I'm not quite that.

Thank you! That's so sweet of you to say!

The best part is that there are so many terms for all sorts of experiences and we can choose to be as broad or as specific as we want when we talk about our genders.

@@StormyTalks that's true

That is correct!

Oh, I love that!

Genderfluid typically means a change from one gender to the other and back again. Bigender simply means being two genders, whether they change back and forth or they happen at the same time. Some people are both.

@@StormyTalks thanks

?

Anytime! I always want to provide resources and information for people who need it.

Of course! I hope it was helpful!

I'm not entirely sure! I think xenogenders are meant to be outside of human categories of gender like "binary" and "nonbinary", so they wouldn't be considered abinary or nonbinary. But it also depends on how someone wishes to use those labels for themselves.

@@StormyTalks yaya true :3 im also not entirely sure what is considered xenogender bc would boygirlic be considered one or not because it "technically" relates to the binary? all questions i can figure out but i just love learning mogai stuff :3

@ambrosesky It can be tough because there is a lot of overlap! Some xenogenders might relate to conventional human genders. My gender is abinary but also binary at the same time. Gender isn't always easily sorted into categories and people will define their own personal genders in ways that don't always fit their definitions exactly.

Yes!

Correct!

@@StormyTalks nice, i love learning about different genders and identities and stuff

I'm glad it was informative!

I specifically wanted to use abinary because it sounds so similar to nonbinary, which would get people wondering why it's so similar and what the difference is. It's easy to mix up nonbinary and abinary for someone who is trying to learn more about these identities.

@@StormyTalks Ah I see. Maybe there can be both terms in the title? For example, "Nonbinary vs. Abinary (Aphorian)"

Of course!

Same lol

You can use both transgender and demiboy as labels if you want to. It's reasonable to use more than one label to talk about your gender even if you feel that you only have one gender. You don't have to call yourself transgender and you can just say you're a demiboy, but that's entirely up to you.

Anytime! I'm glad I could help. 💙

Thank you!

Awesome!

Ayo! Another triple A binary!

Cool, thank you for sharing!

I don't know how I could help you other than reassuring you that you can definitely call yourself otherkin if you're comfortable with that as a label.

@@StormyTalks okay! Thank you!

It's just not up to you to decide how I explain my experiences with gender. Having this kind of outlet to do just that has been so helpful to me. I never knew why I felt the way I did until I looked deeper and realized that other people feel this too. I realized that there are words for what this is. That's important to me. It's okay if it's not important to you because you're not me and you don't experience the same things that I do, and that's okay.

I can definitely see that correlation!

Thank you for sharing! I'm happy to see fellow demiboys.

@@StormyTalks Long live to the Demi boys 🙌🎉 hahaha

I'm glad the little bit of my memoir helped you out in some way! I haven't been able to see a lot of resources on transmaverinity but over time, more people might start talking about it.

People's experiences with gender are not something you can simply disagree with, like it's an opinion. These are real people with real experiences. So, if you're talking about "reality", xenogender and neurogender folks live in that reality. It's not something you can discredit or invalidate just because it isn't YOUR experience. I honestly don't trust the word of any transmedicalist because of the serious harm your ideology does to this community and your unwillingness to change. Nondysphoric trans people have never taken anything from me or harmed me in any way. They don't hurt us. They are accepted by the majority of our community because they are trans. They are just trying to exist like the rest of us. They didn't wake up one day and decide they want life to be harder for them. Nobody does this. At the end of the day, we all generally wish to have access to medical care and equitable rights and we all face the same discrimination for being trans. You say that I should correct you if you're wrong (with a backhanded smiling emote like you didn't just send me a wall of transphobia) but you don't seem like the kind of person who will actually do your research and be a better person in all this. Why does there need to be a study of neurodivergent people who experience gender differently when you can just listen to their experiences? Do people need a study on transgender people in order to see our experiences as real? I exist. I'm trans. I tell my story to whoever will listen. Sometimes, that's more than enough. Also, nonbinary is an incredibly broad term that encompasses a number of experiences in proximity to and outside of the binary. That means there are tons of ways to be nonbinary. Sometimes, it's not enough to just say nonbinary. People might assume it means genderless, or entirely not male or female, or something androgynous. That's why we need new language and terminology to fill that lexical gap. Xenogender refers to genders that do not fall into any human categorization of gender (which means a lot of people don't even consider it a nonbinary gender.) Neurogender is often the best way that neurodivergent people can explain their gender because a lot of conformant terminology falls flat. It is an exclusive gender while nonbinary is, again, far to broad. Unfortunately, whether the dissenter is neurodivergent or not, invalidating one's neurogender experience is in fact ableist. You're trying to find some kind of physicality in being trans. You're reinventing gender essentialism in that way. You see it as physically men, physically women, and the singular third gender known as nonbinary. That's not how it works at all and you are nothing more than a conservative with harmful, backwards beliefs about trans people. I don't know why you go out of your way to call yourself a transmedicalist anyway. We already have a tool for trans people who believe you can't be trans without dysphoria. It's called being a traitor.

here wait lemme fix this for u...ahem "my take on other peoples lives and genders and why i think i get to have a say in what....literally anyone does! also im a huge dick dont listen to anything i have to say!" better? :D

I have, but gay is fine for me. It encompasses the same and similar genders and is very flexible as a term.

@@StormyTalks 🥰🫂

@StormyTalks I wasn't trying to be rude I got confused

It's fine. I just don't like the implication that I can't be gay just because I'm not strictly same-gender attracted. And I didn't mention anything about sexuality, just attraction, so the -sexual part of androsexual was a weird suggestion.

@StormyTalks ohhh, my bad I feel bad now

I'm glad you discovered transmaverine! I'm still exploring that part of my identity but it helps so much that I now have a word for this very specific experience.