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Assalamu Alaikum, Thank you for reaching out, I’m so sorry to hear that you’re dealing with abusive behavior from your spouse. This is a very challenging situation, and I want to acknowledge your strength in seeking guidance. May Allah ﷻ ease your pain and guide you toward peace and resolution. Handling Abusive Behavior 1. Understand the Situation Abuse, whether emotional, verbal, or physical, is not acceptable in any relationship. Islam emphasizes kindness and respect in marriage. The Prophet ﷺ said: “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” (Tirmidhi) 2. Communicate Calmly If you feel safe, try to address the issue with your spouse during a calm moment. Use “I” statements to express how his behavior affects you, such as, “I feel hurt and disrespected when I’m spoken to in this way.” However, if the abuse escalates or you feel unsafe, prioritize your safety and seek help from trusted family members, community leaders, or professionals. 3. Set Boundaries Let your spouse know that certain behaviors, such as name-calling, belittling, or threats, are unacceptable. Setting clear boundaries is essential to protect your emotional and mental well-being. 4. Seek Support Reach out to someone you trust, whether it’s a family member, friend, or community leader, who can mediate or provide emotional support. Consider counseling or coaching to help you navigate the situation. A Banani Method-trained coach can guide you in addressing the abuse and finding ways to improve your relationship. Calming Yourself in Challenging Moments 1. Turn to Allah ﷻ Engage in acts of worship, such as salah, dua, and dhikr, to find peace and strength. Allah ﷻ says: “Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (Surah Ar-Ra’d, 13:28) Pour your heart out to Allah ﷻ and ask Him for guidance, patience, and strength. 2. Practice Deep Breathing When you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to breathe deeply. Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, and exhale for 4 seconds. This can help calm your nervous system and bring clarity to your thoughts. 3. Focus on Gratitude Write down or reflect on the blessings in your life. Shifting your focus to gratitude can help you find moments of peace amidst the challenges. 4. Engage in Self-Care Take time to care for yourself, whether it’s through exercise, reading, journaling, or spending time with supportive loved ones. I highly recommend exploring the 5 Pillars of Marriage Program, which provides practical tools to improve communication, rebuild connection, and address challenges in marriage. Many individuals have seen positive changes by applying these principles, even when their spouse wasn’t initially cooperative. You can learn more here: www.5pillarsofmarriage.com/save. If you’d like personalized support, we also offer one-on-one and group sessions with Banani Method-trained coaches who can help you navigate this difficult situation. Sister, you are incredibly strong for enduring this and seeking help. Remember, Allah ﷻ sees your struggles and your efforts, and He is the Most Merciful and the Most Just. Trust in His wisdom and know that you are not alone. The Prophet ﷺ said: “When a servant of Allah suffers from a hardship or sorrow, Allah expiates his sins because of it.” (Bukhari and Muslim) May Allah ﷻ ease your pain, guide your spouse to fulfill his responsibilities with kindness, and grant you peace and happiness in your heart and home. You are in my duas. Best regards, Aisha, on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani. Haleh Banani's Support Team

@haleh_banani thank u so much mam....he us cheating on me we I caught him he is going against me that he does all this because me....toxic behaviour pe react b nahi karna kya mam

Salam Alaikum sister. I am sorry to hear about your situation. For further assistance, please drop us an email at support@halehbanani.com May Allah ease your difficulty Regards, Aisha

Why are you commenting such a thing on a video like this. You should learn to respect other people's language,culture,religion etc. like dude where is your tolerance

@@MuhammadArslaan7312 he is the chaytan Helper don't waist your time on hem

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh, Thank you for your comment and for engaging with the video! I’m so glad you found it beneficial, Alhamdulillah. Yes, I absolutely address questions from sisters going through different situations, and I’m here to offer advice rooted in Islamic principles and emotional well-being. Inner beauty is about cultivating a strong connection with Allah ﷻ, developing self-awareness, and nurturing qualities like patience, kindness, and gratitude. Life can present us with various challenges, but how we respond to them shapes our inner beauty and strength. If a Muslim woman is facing difficulties, here are some general steps she can take: 1. Strengthen Your Connection with Allah ﷻ Turn to Allah ﷻ in every situation. Make dua, pray Tahajjud, and recite Quran regularly. Allah ﷻ says: “And whoever fears Allah - He will make for him a way out.” (Surah At-Talaq, 65:2) Your connection with Allah ﷻ is your anchor in navigating life’s storms. 2. Take Care of Yourself Self-care is not selfish; it’s essential. Whether it’s taking a walk, journaling, or spending time with supportive friends, refueling yourself emotionally and physically will help you face challenges with clarity and strength. 3. Seek Knowledge and Guidance Equip yourself with knowledge about your situation. Whether it’s through Islamic teachings, professional counseling, or programs like the Mindful Hearts Academy, learning how to navigate challenges can empower you to make better decisions. 4. Surround Yourself with Supportive People Surround yourself with practicing Muslims who uplift and inspire you. A strong support system can make a world of difference in overcoming difficulties. 5. Focus on Small Wins If you’re struggling with confidence or self-esteem, start with small steps. Accomplishing little goals can boost your morale and help you feel more in control. If you have a specific question or situation you’d like advice on, feel free to share, and I’ll do my best to guide you, inshaAllah. You can also explore resources like the 5 Pillars of Marriage Program or the Laugh & Learn Program, which provide practical tools for personal and relationship growth. May Allah ﷻ bless you with ease, strength, and inner beauty that radiates through every aspect of your life. Best regards, Aisha, on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani. Haleh Banani's Support Team

Salam Alaikum sister. Thank you for opening up and sharing your story. I can feel the immense pain and exhaustion in your words, and I want to acknowledge your strength for enduring such a difficult situation for so long. You are not weak-on the contrary, you’ve shown incredible resilience and patience for the sake of Allah ﷻ and your children. It’s heartbreaking to hear how much this has affected not only you but also your children. Emotional abuse and constant shouting can have long-term effects on everyone involved, and it’s clear that you’ve been trying your best to hold everything together. Your Feelings Are Valid You’ve been trying to support a man who has admitted he needs help but refuses to take the necessary steps to change. It’s not your responsibility to fix him, especially when his behavior is causing so much harm to you and your children. Feeling sorry for him is natural, but it’s important to prioritize your well-being and the emotional health of your children. Is It Time to Let Go? From what you’ve described, your husband’s behavior has been consistent for 26 years, despite his acknowledgment of needing help. If he’s not willing to make a genuine effort to change and continues to disregard the impact of his actions, it may be time to reevaluate the marriage. Allah ﷻ does not want us to endure harm endlessly. In situations like this, it’s essential to ask yourself: Is staying in this marriage helping or harming my emotional and spiritual well-being? How is this environment affecting my children’s development and mental health? Sometimes, letting go is not about giving up but about protecting yourself and your children from further harm. Steps You Can Take 1. Seek Clarity Before making any major decisions, take time to reflect and evaluate your options. A one-on-one session with a professional counselor or a Banani Method-trained coach can help you weigh the pros and cons of staying or leaving. You can book a session here: halehbanani.com/. 2. Focus on Your Emotional Health Anxiety attacks and emotional exhaustion are serious signs that your mental health is being affected. Prioritize self-care and seek support from trusted friends, family, or professionals. 3. Protect Your Children Your children deserve to grow up in a safe and nurturing environment. If the current situation is causing them trauma, it’s important to take steps to shield them from further harm. 4. Make Dua and Trust Allah ﷻ Turn to Allah ﷻ for guidance and strength. He is Al-Hakeem (The All-Wise) and Al-Lateef (The Subtle, Most Kind). Ask Him to guide you to what is best for you and your children. You’ve been incredibly strong for enduring this for so long, but strength also lies in knowing when to prioritize your well-being and take steps toward healing. Allah ﷻ says: “Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear.” (Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:286) You’ve done your part, and it’s okay to acknowledge that you’ve reached your limit. If you decide to let go, know that you’re not failing; you’re choosing to protect yourself and your children. May Allah ﷻ ease your pain, guide you to the best decision, and grant you peace and happiness. Best regards, Aisha on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani. Haleh Banani's Support Team

@ Thankyou sister may Allah bless you all for your excellent advice. This is very helpful to. Me and many Insh’Allah. I’ll try my best to resolve what I can

Salam Alaikum sister. Thank you for sharing your experience, and I’m so sorry to hear about the pain you’re going through. It’s heartbreaking to feel dismissed and unsupported by the person who is supposed to be your partner in life. I want you to know that your feelings are valid, and you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. Steps to Address This Situation 1. Focus on Your Emotional Well-being Emotional abuse can take a toll on your self-esteem and mental health. It’s important to prioritize your well-being by practicing self-care and seeking support. Remember, Allah ﷻ has honored you and given you value, and no one has the right to make you feel unworthy. 2. Choose the Right Time to Communicate When addressing your husband’s behavior, choose a calm moment when emotions aren’t running high. Use “I” statements to express how his actions make you feel. For example: “I feel hurt and unappreciated when my concerns are dismissed, and I want us to work together to improve our relationship.” 3. Set Boundaries It’s important to set clear boundaries to protect yourself emotionally. Let him know that while you’re open to discussing issues, you won’t tolerate being belittled or having your concerns turned into personal attacks. 4. Work on Yourself Sometimes, making changes within yourself can shift the dynamic in your relationship. Programs like my 5 Pillars of Marriage can help you learn techniques to improve communication, set boundaries, and create a healthier relationship dynamic. You can explore it here: halehbanani.com/. 5. Seek Support If his behavior continues to harm your emotional well-being, it’s important to seek support. This could be through a trusted family member, a community leader, or a professional counselor. Our Banani Method-trained coaches specialize in helping individuals navigate these challenges. You can book a session here: halehbanani.com/. 6. Evaluate the Relationship If the emotional abuse persists and is tearing down your self-esteem, you may need to reevaluate the relationship. Remember, Allah ﷻ does not want us to endure harm, and your emotional and spiritual health must be protected. You are already taking a brave step by acknowledging the issue and seeking guidance. Allah ﷻ reminds us: “And We have certainly honored the children of Adam.” (Surah Al-Isra, 17:70) This honor and dignity are your right, and no one should take that away from you. You are stronger than you think, and with the right support, you can navigate this challenge, insha’Allah. If you’d like more personalized guidance, please don’t hesitate to reach out for a session. We are here to support you every step of the way. May Allah ﷻ ease your pain, guide your husband to better behavior, and bring peace and happiness into your life. Best regards, Aisha on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani. Haleh Banani's Support Team

Wa Alaikum Assalam dear sister, Thank you for reaching out and sharing your concerns. I’m so sorry to hear about the challenges you’re facing, and I want to assure you that you’re not alone. Let’s address your two concerns step by step, insha’Allah. 1. Identifying Depression Depression can manifest in many ways, and it’s important to recognize the signs. Here are some common symptoms: a) Persistent sadness or feeling empty. b) Loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed. c) Changes in appetite or sleep patterns. d) Difficulty concentrating or making decisions. e) Feeling hopeless, worthless, or guilty. f) Physical symptoms like fatigue or aches without a clear cause. If you find that these feelings are overwhelming or immobilizing, it’s essential to seek professional help. Depression is not a weakness; it’s a condition that can be treated with the right support. For mild to moderate depression, self-care strategies like going for walks, practicing gratitude, controlling negative self-talk, and surrounding yourself with supportive people can help. However, if it feels severe, professional intervention is crucial. You can book a session with one of our Banani Method-trained coaches here: halehbanani.com/. 2. Dealing with a Husband Who Makes You Feel Like a Problem It’s incredibly painful when the person you love makes you feel this way. Here are some steps you can take: a) Communicate Openly: When the time feels right, have an honest conversation with your husband. Share how his words and actions are affecting you emotionally, using “I” statements to avoid blame. For example: “I feel hurt and unappreciated when I’m made to feel like a problem, and I want us to work together to improve our relationship.” b) Set Boundaries: While it’s important to empathize with your husband’s struggles, it’s equally important to protect your emotional well-being. Let him know that respect and understanding are essential for a healthy relationship. c) Work on Yourself: Many women I’ve worked with have found that when they focus on their own growth and emotional well-being, their spouse often responds positively to these changes. Programs like the Mindful Hearts Membership can provide you with tools to strengthen yourself emotionally and spiritually. d) Seek Counseling: If your husband is open to it, couples counseling can be very effective. If he’s not willing, working on yourself through individual counseling can still bring significant changes to your relationship dynamic. Resources to Help You: Free Guide: Download “7 Gems to Revolutionize Your Marriage” for practical strategies to improve your relationship: Download Here. Professional Support: Book a session with a Banani Method-trained coach to receive personalized guidance: halehbanani.com/. Remember, Allah ﷻ says: “Verily, with hardship comes ease.” (Surah Ash-Sharh, 94:6) This is a test, and with patience, effort, and the right support, you can overcome it, insha’Allah. You’ve already taken a brave step by seeking help, and that shows your strength and determination. May Allah ﷻ ease your pain, guide you, and bring peace and happiness into your life. Best regards, Aisha on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani. HB's Support Team

@haleh_banani jazakallah khair this really helps alot may Allah reward you

@@zakkiya6679 Alhamdullah. Insha'Allah things will work out well with you:) Regards, Aisha HB's Support Team

Salam Alaikum. Thank you for reaching out. Should you need further assistance, please drop us an email at support@halehbanani.com

Salam Alaikum. Thank you for reaching out and I am sorry to hear you are facing some challenges. Should you need further assistance, please reach out on support@halehbanani.com Regards, Aisha HB's Support Team

Salam Alaikum, thank you for sharing your situation. I can sense how much pain and frustration you’re experiencing, and I want to acknowledge your courage in reaching out for help. It’s clear that you deeply love and care for your husband, but his jealousy, controlling behavior, and constant accusations are taking a toll on your emotional well-being. First, it’s important to recognize that these behaviors-jealousy, control, and suspicion-often stem from underlying insecurities or unresolved issues, which may be related to his past experiences or mental health struggles. While you love him and want to support him, it’s also vital to prioritize your own emotional safety and well-being. Steps You Can Take: 1. Have an Honest Conversation Choose a calm moment to have a heart-to-heart discussion with your husband. Express how his behavior is affecting you emotionally and how it’s impacting your relationship. Use “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory, such as: “I feel hurt and overwhelmed when I’m accused of lying because I value honesty and loyalty in our relationship.” Gently encourage him to share his feelings and fears, and reassure him of your love and loyalty. 2. Set Healthy Boundaries While it’s natural to want to reassure your husband, it’s also important to set boundaries to protect your emotional well-being. Let him know that trust is essential in any relationship and that constant accusations and control are damaging. 3. Seek Professional Help Given his mental health challenges and the complexity of your situation, I strongly recommend seeking professional counseling. A therapist or counselor trained in both psychological techniques and cross-cultural relationships can help you both navigate these issues. If he’s open to it, couples counseling can be a safe space to address his insecurities and work on building trust. 4. Focus on Self-Care Your emotional health matters. Engage in activities that bring you peace and joy, whether it’s spending time with supportive friends, engaging in hobbies, or practicing mindfulness techniques. Consider the Banani Method I’ve worked with many individuals and couples facing similar struggles, and my Banani Method combines psychological tools with compassionate guidance to create lasting change. You can learn more about booking a session here: halehbanani.com/. 5. Explore Resources If you’re looking for immediate guidance, I recommend downloading my free guide, “7 Gems to Revolutionize Your Marriage”. It offers practical strategies to strengthen your relationship. You can access it here: Download Here. You’ve already taken a brave step by seeking advice, and that shows your strength and commitment to improving your relationship. Remember, while love is a powerful foundation, trust and mutual respect are equally essential for a healthy partnership. May you find the clarity, peace, and support you need to navigate this difficult time. Please don’t hesitate to reach out for further guidance. Best regards, Aisha on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani. Haleh Banani's Support Team

Thank you so much, sister. I can't believe you took the time to reply to me. I can imagine how busy you are. Allah bless you. I will try to follow your advice. I'm suffering a lot. ​@@haleh_banani

Hi sister, my relationship is finished. I can't take it anymore. We have separated and we will divorce. What makes me very sad is that he blames me and says that all this is my fault. I'm in a lot of pain but I can't take it anymore. I feel bad about his family as I love them and they love me. I feel very bad as I know he really needs help but I can't. I feel broken