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i believe that we all need more training in this area. y 79 year old husband's grown children live in another state They rarely visit. They call and say "hey dad how are you doing?" He answer I'm fantastic (what he has been answering for the past 30+ years) They probe no furthur. They have no idea how bad his cognitive decline and his multiple neurological issues have progressed I would of course be happy to tell them, but they do not ask because they really do not want to know. To know, would mean that they would have to step up and they really do not want to do that. They send him Smart Phones, Netflix membership and old laptop computers instead of time, energy and attention. Their father suffers as a result..

Can one spouse be on medicaid (approved and meets all requirements) and the other spouse NOT sign up and/or be on medicaid?? Someone suggested this scenario for my husband and i....with him being on Medicaid and me not applying (he hasn't applied yet and may not meet criteria). Is this legal? i.e., one spouse on medicaid and the other on straight medicare.

My problem is constant woozy heads foggy heads blame vax

I lived in Europe for the past seventeen years. All medical is FREE to anyone and everyone at point of need. Nobody applies for anything. You just get it. The USA is the only country in the world with no totally free health care system. The USA system is bad news. What if a person is thirty years old and not employed?

When a Pearson has short term Dementia but he's in a Retirement Home with all the peoples has Alzimer But I don't have a choice

What a great video! This is well worth the time to watch.

As a 74-year-old senior female taking care of her 79-year-old husband with cognitive decline and worsening neurological issues , I view luxury as nice, however I am primarily interested in a living place that has a no-step entrance, low kitchen counters so my husband can cook, grab bars on the bathroom and hallways, wheelchair wide doors, disability bathroom, floor that a wheelchair can navigate and the like. THIS is the only reason I would move at this age. I have downsized already, moved six years ago and invested in a small condo to get away from lawn maintenance, snow removal and leaf pick up etc.. Moving is very, very hard physically, emotionally and financially. We do have a CCRC community in our home and an apartment for two, cleaning the apartment,, sheet changing, plus dinner each night runs my two senior friend's $5,000 every month. That's a lot in this economy.

My 79 years old husband has cognitive decline and neurological issues. We have already downsized to a condo because we can no longer maintain our old 5-acre rural property. We have a Living Trust, I now have his financial and medical power of attorney. I have pre-paid for our cremation and have a family plot. I have been looking for a kind of "Case Manager" to make sure I have not forgotten anything very important We do NOT have long term care endurance because we cannot afford it. We have contacts at our local senior center and they can help with questions, decisions and a Day Care Center. .I have been working on this for the past 7 years now. I have a detailed notebook with all the details for my son who is our executor and lives just 30 minutes from us. My husbuns adult son (from his first marriage) is lined up to be his guardian in case anything happens to me.

YAY. Love her!!! 😘❤️

When my husband was first diagnosed with cognitive decline the first thing I did was get him an appt with my Functional Medicine Physician (who is also our Primary Care Physician.) She did a very thorough round of blood labs and discovered his insulin resisitance (insulin resistance driven cognitive decline.) We took the steps to get that resolved and his a1C is nor normal with diet (the Keto Protocol) exercise and supplements. Then we began to improve his metabolic system again with the supplements his blood labs show he needs. His cognitive decline is not 100% gone but we have slowed it down substantially for the past 15 years. I am also taking him to a gerontologist now as well.

excellent speaker…love her!❤

All the memory care places I’ve looked at want you to bring your own bed and furniture so it feels like home. I couldn’t believe that they don’t even provide a bed for what they charge! I know that won’t work for my husband. He’s been in the hospital for 28 days. The doctor doesn’t think he’ll be able to live at home again. Thank you for your video.

I have been wondering why there is not people who does just this job. Do seniors have to be in a care center to qualify? Does Medicare and insurance covers this role? Is there a list of Care Managers in different states in the US (we live in Michigan.) Must there be a specific diagnosis to qualify? My husband (no long-term care insurance or VA connection) was diagnosed with cognitive decline and undiagnosed neurological issues. I have been trying to read/research/learn about how to navigate this new journey. But it's all been STRUGGLING on my own even though I talk to my older friends at our local senior center and at our dementia support group. So far, I found him a 1) gerontologist, 2) have gotten our living trust re-written, 3) I got his medical and financial Power of Attorney, 4) I sent letters of his diagnosis copied and mailed to every one of his doctors, dentists, financial advisor, lawyer to make sure they all know of his diagnosis. 5) Next, I pre-paid our cremations to lock the price in and to get al of this done now rather than later when he cannot be left alone.

Hospice was amazing for my father and myself. I can't say enough good about the people involved. ❤

Even the most high-dollar, newest facility in our town has few trained staff ( they are basically teens) and frequent turnover. I can’t see how they are getting care deserved.

My husband has always denied anything he doesn’t want to deal with as long as I’ve known him. When his parents had dementia he wouldn’t do anything because “they were fine”. Now he is exhibiting symptoms of dementia in the early stages, and also is in denial that this is happening. I can’t get him to tell the doctor there are issues with his memory and other symptoms, and the doctor listens to,him when I ask that he has an assessment. He gets very angry and denies there a problem and then points out my flaws to the doctor, real or imagined. This is shocking to me and a change in his behaviour. He’s never been confrontational or angry. He’s become childlike in arguing about things. He never argued like that before and I don’t know what to do other than let him deteriorate and allow him to get lost when out driving. I’m so scared he’s going to get into a bad accident, or get a call from someone that he is lost and can’t find his home. He forgets his wallet and get stuck in a rut of things he has to buy. He has bought 8 toilet bowl cleaners so far, and keeps buying more coke for himself when he went out to buy Fresca for me. I am disabled so I can’t go drive and shop for him to avoid this. When I tell him I will buy it online he forgets and goes shopping again. How do I tell the doctor I’m concerned when he doesn’t listen to me about my husband.

THIS!! was the most informational and phenomenal video on dementia I have watched! My mom is currently in the hospital in another state and transferred to the psych ward. I have been reading and watching videos to try and educate myself on dementia. Thank you Dr. Cummings! I am sure I will be reaching out to you as I am blown away..mildly put..you really know your stuff! and with a great sense of humor like my own..which I am finding to be more rare as each day passes. Thank you again, many blessings!

Here in my province of Nova Scotia, Canada: for Long Term Care payment comes from the spousal net income. They won’t touch your house, savings or investments and they will leave the remaining spouse 60% of the net joint income no matter what.

I’m a full-time caregiver for my 63-year-old wife with FTD and PPA. She’s lost her speech and comprehension and is completely dependent on me for every function during the day and has urinary incontinence and once in a while has a bowel accident. I have systems set up to help me get through my week… I’ve streamlined processes and come up with approaches to dealing with her particular needs and I’ve enlisted two sisters and my daughter to give me respite breaks of 2-3 hours one day each during the week, in addition to taking advantage of a local day program for a few hours three times a week. I guess I’m very lucky in that she’s cooperative, placid, and generally content. To keep my mind occupied, I started a RUclips channel about our journey and general tips on dementia care, with a focus on husbands caring for their wives. There seems to be a real gap in that knowledge base as I think most husbands don’t carry-on as long as I have. My aim is to keep her home as long as possible, possibly to the end, however, I haven’t ruled out long-term care if the need really arises. Please check out my channel!

My mom is in a home with only 7 residents and she’s alone all the time. She hates it. All of the residents eat in their bedrooms and my mom eats alone at the table. It’s a terrible situation

People would be happy for respite or moving their loved one to a memory care facility early on, but the cost is prohibitive. Most people don’t have $7,000 extra lying around to pay someone to elder sit. Extreme work (waiting until you can’t do it anymore), makes more sense for the extremely high cost.

Awesome Video. I appreciate the tips for family members and caregivers. Thank You. Emma and Kim :)

I learned something from a nurse friend that really helped me on our dementia journey. I was then trying to get my 79-yeard old husband diagnosed. He would "rise to the occasion" at the doctors appt. and they could not see his memory and behavioral changes. My nurse friend suggested that I do the following; Write out a bulleted list of "What I see at home." Then ask the receptionist to please give this to his new gerontologist prior to going in the exam room for our appointment. This way I did not have to "talk negatively" about my husband in front of him. I also asked for a written diagnosis letter to give to our lawyer, financial advisor, etc. to get him off of our financials, to get a formal financial power of attorney and medical power of attorney. (He was making major financial mistakes the past few years and I had to get that stopped to preserve what funds we have left.) I wrote this bulleted listing and found it to be super helpful to meet my end goal(s.) This new physician read my letter, she believed me and gave him the appropriate tests and wrote me the desired diagnosis letter I requested. I was able to get two doctors letter and submit them to A) he lawyer (to get our trust changed) B) to the bank (to get him off of our financial accounts to stop the unnecessary money drain.)

This is so true. Most everyone asks me, "How is your husband doing?" Almost no one asks me, "How are you doing?" We do have an adult day care center in my town but this now runs $90.00 per day. This is really hard for most of us to afford.

Thank you for all of the great advice. I am going through some of this with my 79-year-old husband currently. His cognitive loss began 10+ year ago and he had an initial diagnosis of early cognitive decline. I swung into Functional Medicine and my physician found out that some of his cognition issues were due to his insulin resistance. We got that under control with strict diet and lifestyle changes and a number of supplements he took based on his blood labs. Fortunately we were abler to considerably slow his decline down for around 10 years. Now his brain is changing again as well as his body. His mobility is being directly effected by his neuropathy, hammer toes and osteoarthritis in his knee (they suspect Charcot Marie Tooth Disease.) His new Geriatrcian re-diagnosed him as Stage 4 neurological decline due to his difficulty with financial issues, inability to plan and follow through etc. I have recently taken over his Medical Power of Attorney and Financial Power of Attorney and we again updated our Family Trust. I began taking over our financial planning, budgeting and check writing and now I will be taking over our finances 100%. I have already taken over all of the maintenance of our condo, vehicle maintenance, errand running, food sourcing, cooking etc He has not driven now for 6 years. I WISH there was a book with a step by step list of what I need to get done regarding our legal needs. I feel strongly that I need to get as much of this done now before his cognition becomes even worse. I am also managing his doctors apts, dental appts, catarac removals, eye exams, new glasses, blood labs twice a year, colonscopcies, grab bars installed, haircuts and so on. I am SO in favor if your decision to not do the hospital and medicine route. I am so in favor of that way of caring. This is my plan as well. My husband rarely talks to me now, has no empathy towards me and often acts like a 15-year old teenager thinking only of his own needs. For me the hardest thing is dealing with my anger and frustration with our situation. I just completed a year of therapy and that helped a lot and I just rejoined a support group to continue the "talking" but I find I am quick to anger. I try for breaks, I take care of my dog and walk her outside, continue my once a month massage and try to reconnect with my art. But the anger often remains. I feel like I have given up almost everything; my art studio, my hot tub, my pet chickens and my rural home with my beautiful garden and art studio business and my energy I have my own Autoimmune health issues and I need a lot of rest, peace and time to recharge so this makes it doubly difficult for me.

This was a plethora of quality information, greatly appreciated. Headed to your website now. Thank you.

I needed to see this although my husband and siblings are not ready for this move. Being the one who spends more time with Mom I think it is time.

This was an amazing podcast with so much helpful information and so happy to now have Dr. Cummings as a resource. Thank you!

Thank you, this helps

Thank you so much. This is so extremely helpful.

My mother has always been a loner, and she is in a great memory care home with about thirty residents who are all at the same level of dementia (moderate) She is isolating and want to go home to be surrounded by her stuff. She is staying in bed for breakfast. She just wants to be in her beautiful home with all her possessions. She would be unsafe living alone, and would not accept outside caregivers, I cannot live and care for her without her abusing me and treating me like a live in servant. Her desire to go home is getting worse after a year and she says she does not fit in with the other residents, but they do chat to her and everyone is very nice to her. She says she has been “dumped”. I am not sure how to approach this.

WHAT IF THEY DONT EVEN RECOGNIZE THEIR OWN BATHROOM OR BEDROOM NOW..OR DOESN'T KNOW WHERE THE KITCHEN IS AT HOME😢!

Thank u Teepa for all the information ❤

NEVER!

⭐️I am here! All things you are saying truth!!

I have studied with Teepa and PAC for over 10 years. For the past 18 years, I've been providing assistance for families looking for dementia care in San Diego County. A Senior Placement and Referral Specialist is the person to work with because, if we have lasted in this trade for more than 2 years - we know how to evaluate the options and we share that with you so that you can choose the best. I care about my reputation and that's what I've built my business upon. Plus I have a passion for dementia care. I suggest your work with an agent so that you don't go to places that are not good, or too much money, or just don't provide the level of sophistication in their care approaches. It's a thought

❤I live in Sourh Africa. After watching this I am so glad that I kept at it because I could see my husband deteriorate. He was finally diagnosed with FTD after a brain MRI. Now I am taking him to a sphyciatrist for the correct meds(hopefully) to treat his symptoms❤

Reviewing all videos . Studiying. Thank you

This was a plethora of quality information, greatly appreciated. Headed to your website now. Thank you.

Love always 💞💞💞

Rachel appears to be an excellent therapist.

Thank you 😊

Was it reported?

It only lasts so long. It’s actually cruel to loved ones to not accept reality. At the early stages, they know better if they have a healthy emotional intelligence. If not, it makes everything a mess.

What about abuse my ex-husband abuse her . She is 22 now .I wish I could do something

I'm doing my absolute best to 'walk carefully' with my mom, but the resentment toward me when I'm trying to get her to take her medications on schedule, and the resentment and anger toward me is very difficult to deal with. Suggestions?

Question: Dad's got memory issue(s) and has fecal incontinence. He soils the floor(s) all the time, tracking it through my house. I can't keep up with the carpet cleaning in his room much less the additional parts of the house where he travels unknowingly tracking it all over my floor. Please. Tell me it's time. He has a house but only Medicare and social security. What does it cost him to get into a facility?

Thank you!

It is asking a lot from kids, especially if they are out of town and need to manage their own lives.