Is Oral Sex Safe Sex? A Gay Man Speaks Out
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- Опубликовано: 9 фев 2025
- From his HIV diagnosis in 1985 until his death in April of 2009, Cass Mann was one of the world's longest-term HIV-positive survivors. He founded Positively Healthy, the UK's only HIV/AIDS charity staffed exclusively by openly gay men, which provided HIV services including education, support, and peer counselling. These videos now archive his wisdom and insight for future generations. Here he talks about the risks of oral sex. Oral sex, known as "giving head" or "blow jobs", can transmit HIV, syphilis, and other STIs. Syphilis together with HIV is a killer combination. Remember that dementia is a possible end-stage complication of both syphilis and HIV. If you have unprotected sex, you're risking syphilis, HIV, gonorrhoea, and whatever other diseases your partner has in their system. However, it's difficult to get gay men to use condoms for oral sex because people consider the risk much lower than anal sex. It's true that the risk of HIV transmission via oral sex is lower than the risk of HIV transmission via anal sex, but the risk isn't zero, and the risk isn't only of HIV transmission. Remember that your partner might have had sex, including anal sex, with other partners immediately before you have oral sex with them, especially in the context of dark rooms, back rooms and parks. Oral sex is most definitely not safer sex. Use a condom if you choose to have oral sex, as difficult as you may initially consider this to be. For more information, visit www.AIDSvideos..... This video is freely downloadable from www.archive.org... . [Do you want to help prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS? Are you fluent in a language other than English? Then volunteer to translate our videos into other languages! Click AIDSvideos.org/... to to learn how you can help!!! © Copyright 2008-2011 Global Lifeworks. All rights reserved. This work is licensed to be used for non-commercial purposes under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License. To view a copy of this license, visit creativecommons....]
As someone who contracted HIV orally back in '93 from my ex (I discovered during our relationship that he'd lied to me about his HIV status, which I'd asked him about when we first met), I know that it's not "practically risk-free" as many gay men would simply LOVE to believe. I'm glad that people are finally learning the truth about this - when I first tried to warn my gay friends after my diagnosis they didn't even believe how I caught it - they were sure that I lied about not having anal sex.
Hi Cass! I'd just like to say that I love your style and your vids - very informative and blunt, keep up the great work! I found out that I was HIV+ after breaking up with my ex (who, I discovered during our relationship, lied about his HIV+ status) and we only had oral sex, not anal. You wouldn't believe the disbelief from my gay friends when I tried to tell them you CAN catch HIV from oral - they simply didn't want to hear that. Now, at least, many people know that it's somewhat risky to do.
Regardless of what statistical data is present - do people just not value their own health enough to say to an easy 'root' - 'wrap it before I suck on it'? I always do and will never allow anyone to put my own health at risk, period. You're worth more than that, guys!
The CDC also says in the same document that "casual contact through closed-mouth or 'social' kissing" doesn't pose a risk of transmitting HIV, but for some reason RUclips's comment feature isn't letting me post that quote.
This is Eric. "Don't take the risk of unprotected sex" doesn't translate to "don't have sex." It means don't have unprotected sex, which is not the same thing. I don't know the relative risk estimates on unprotected oral sex vs. protected anal sex off the top of my head. Cass was incredibly sympathetic; he spent the last couple of decades of his life trying to motivate and educate gay men make safer choices.
wow! that all i can say.. glad i watched this video
Other things to consider: (1) If an HIV+ person has any open wounds or bleeding sores on their mouth, lips, or tongue, that could increase the risk of HIV transmission, so an HIV+ person with those issues should inform their partner and discuss. (2) Make sure you know the laws about age of consent, etc. in your area and obey them. (3) Talk to your parents.
The reason that condom usage for oral sex is hardly even propagated by safer sex campaigns is that they feel that people might at some point cease to comply with their suggestions. If you take too much fun out of this, people in high risk groups may abandon safer sex altogether. Given the low risk of oral sex without ejaculation in one's mouth, I understand that position. Don't be fooled. Oral sex without ejaculation is safer sex. Safe sex, however, does not exist!
This is Eric; I'm not a doctor. "Because of the potential for contact with blood during "French" or open-mouth kissing, CDC recommends against engaging in this activity with a person known to be infected. However, the risk of acquiring HIV during open-mouth kissing is believed to be very low. CDC has investigated only one case of HIV infection that may be attributed to contact with blood during open-mouth kissing." [CDC, "HIV and Its Transmission"]
Wow. This guy is awesome.
rip cass mann
This is Eric; I'm not a doctor. There are multiple documented cases of HIV transmission that was believed to have occurred through exclusive exposure via oral sex (although the number of such "documented exclusive oral exposure" cases is not large). See our videos "What's the Risk I've Contracted HIV?" and "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" for details.
You're making a dangerous error by assuming there's some kind of strong correlation between a person being "dirty" and their risk of transmitting HIV to you. A person could look like a supermodel but have contracted HIV one month earlier and be in the throes of primary HIV infection during which they're most infectious. There's no way to tell a person's risk of transmitting HIV to you by looking at them. If you choose to be sexually active use a condom correctly every time.
@mrwonderfulman2011: I'm not hitting a brick wall. I'm hitting (1) a RUclipsr who very much wants to believe that oral sex is 100% safe, CDC statements notwithstanding, and is making selective use of experts, quotes, and data; (2) a single medical doctor who is making public statements that underestimate the risk of HIV transmission in some situations and contradict both the CDC's official determinations and known, actual documented cases of HIV transmission in the literature.
@mrwonderfulman2011: Some have argued that all of the cases in which oral sex-only HIV transmission was reported were cases where the people had sex in other ways but were not admitting it. However, the CDC has concluded that there are specific cases where the evidence for oral sex-only transmission is compelling.
I knew there was a small risk of HIV transmission through oral sex but i thought there was only one reported case. i know that the risk increase when there are open sores or cuts and with sexual activity four hours before or after brushing your teeth.
@TickleMehNancy: Actually, there have been a few cases documented by CDC researchers where it is believed that HIV transmission occurred via oral sex. See our vid "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" for risk estimates.
Yes, sadly he passed away from cancer.
That's largely true.
I love this guy, but i love how everybody that talks about it being risky doesn't distinguish the level of risk between having an ejaculation take place in your mouth or not. Nobody talks about if you're at higher risk by swallowing/vs just licking... I personally don't go for the gold when i'm down there... unless there's a ring on my finger and we've been to the clinic! So how come nobody touches onthe difference? Anyway, don't have sex at all people... it's obviously not worth it. !!!!!!
It's a synonym meaning a person who has never been exposed to HIV.
@mrwonderfulman2011: You're ignoring the CDC statement I cited previously. I repeat: "There have been a few cases of HIV transmission from performing oral sex on a person infected with HIV" [CDC, "Can I get HIV from oral sex?"] When you arbitrarily choose to ignore the cases identified by the CDC, that of course enables you to believe whatever you want to believe. At your own risk, of course.
@mrwonderfulman2011: You're not paying attention to what I'm writing. I did not say that light kissing on the lips poses a risk of HIV transmission. CDC, and my web site (see "FAQ" on the AIDSvideos site) are clear about that. I wrote "There has been a documented case of HIV transmission just from *deep kissing* when both parties had gum disease or bleeding sores." Look it up. It was an unusual case of intra-familial transmission from an older female relative to a younger female child ...
Neither partner is "safe." Oral sex between two partners (regardless of the sex of each) can transmit HIV. See our vid "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" for details.
@mrwonderfulman2011: [cont'd] ... in a culture where deep kissing between such family relations was considered a normal behavior. Unfortunately, the older relative was HIV+ and both had gum disease and/or bleeding mouth sores, and a documented HIV transmission took place. I did not say that light kissing on the lips risks HIV transmission. (It doesn't.) I said your claim that oral sex is completely safe even with mouth sores and ingestion of blood was irresponsible b/c unsupported by science.
Did he just says at the end that getting hiv from oral sex WITHOU condom is almost imposible?
@DavidJosephDanbee: David: We are relying upon the CDC as our source of information. "There have been a few cases of HIV transmission from performing oral sex on a person infected with HIV." -- U.S. CDC, "HIV Transmission," accessed 12 Sept 2011. If you disagree, take it up with the CDC.
@AIDSvideos There have been a few studies where they monitored couples where the male was positive and the female was negative over 2 years and the couples said they didn't use condoms for oral and used condoms for intercourse and the female did not seroconvert at all.The only cases they have where the person became positive due to oral sex are due to stories. Never in a controlled situation did it occur. But there is probably a minuscule risk. For the receiver there is a theoretical one only
@mrwonderfulman2011: This statement is irresponsible. There has been a documented case of HIV transmission just from *deep kissing* when both parties had gum disease or bleeding sores. Therefore it seems highly irresponsible to make a blanket statement that oral sex poses no risk for HIV (contradicting the CDC), even in the presence of a sore and ingestion of blood (more irresponsible still).
Yeah do it with someone you trust.
ah, HELLO! this is not simply a "gay man", this is a crossdresser, and the two are absolutely NOT the same thing! TRUST ME!
is he talking about the insertive partner or receptive partner, which is safe?
Granted, unprotected oral comes with a risk, but is that like saying driving a car in any instance comes with a risk? To say that something CAN happen or is possible is really not saying much. What about context? What if the encounter isn't totally random? Its not clear who this message is aimed at - is it aimed at those who have undiscriminating casual sex, or ALL gay men, regardless of how they met their partners? What are the statistics?
This is Eric; I'm not a doctor. See wikipedia article on "HIV" and our video "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One." 1 chance in 20,000 per occurrence without a condom. [Varghese et al (2002). "Reducing the risk of sexual HIV transmission: quantifying the per-act risk for HIV on the basis of choice of partner, sex act, and condom use". Sex. Transm. Dis. 29 (1): 3843.] e.g. if this is done 200 times, that's a 1% chance of transmission. Using a condom will greatly reduce risk.
See our vid "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" for statistics on risk of transmission via oral sex and other sexual practices. Comparisons with the risk of a car trip are actually an excellent way of measuring relative risk and an approach that people would benefit from applying more generally to rationally assess risk. (e.g. People tend to worry too much about exotic risks they don't understand that have low risk of actual effect and underestimate familiar risks.)
@shenzhenprostitute: Watch our vid "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" for estimates of transmission risk for various sexual practices. Obviously you've looked into the issue. You're correct that mouth sores/wounds increase transmission risk. Not sure "gums OK, no risk" is true--and how would you know every time for sure if your partner's gums are OK? Glad you do some things to reduce risk. But be real w/ yourself that you're not at zero risk. Ask yourself: Is it worth it?
@mrwonderfulman2011: Great, so you paid $20 to have an "expert" make a sweeping generalization that's very much open to question (how could the doctor know the rate of HIV infection among "escorts" in all industrialized countries? what's the doctor's definition of "escort"?) and minimize the risk posed by sex with sex workers. Even if the risk is low, you'll still be really unhappy if you're the one who contracts HIV!
@mrwonderfulman2011: See our video "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" for details.
@KooturKoot: "HIV naive" = "has never been exposed to HIV."
@mrwonderfulman2011: Actually, I'm not on call to track down random doctors on the Internet and start arguments with them.
@Jibjub80: Watch our vid "Some Ways You Can Contract HIV and the Risk of Each One" if you want numerical estimates of the relative risks of HIV transmission via different sexual practices.
@mrwonderfulman2011: The CDC has expert MDs too. Here's what they say. "Yes, it is possible for either partner to become infected with HIV through performing or receiving oral sex. There have been a few cases of HIV transmission from performing oral sex on a person infected with HIV .... Studies have shown that latex condoms are very effective, though not perfect, in preventing HIV transmission when used correctly and consistently." [CDC, "Can I get HIV from oral sex?"]
eww