Amanda sounds exactly like my stepmother back in the era when my dad was still alive. Instead of addressing her antics, my father would have us shift perspectives and see things from another light. It was like coping with abuse to the point where you didn't know. It was akin to the boiling frog metaphor. After he'd pass, the truth came out.
I know being jealous of a dead person is wrong. But the negative feelings and thoughts do creep in. I'm not saying it's valid to feel that way, it just happens. The comparison within the new partner and the previous wife may arise at one point but that needs to be discussed right away between the two parties and not be allowed to fester till it's hard to control anymore. This also needs to be discussed with the kid/s if there were any from a previous relationship because the dynamics would definitely change no matter what anyone says. I think it is ok to acknowledge the happy moments that the previous marriage had but to not let it prevent the new marriage from also having their own traditions and moments being made. Pretty sure the new future potential wife will feel insecure at one point because usually, when a person dies, most of the time only the good things are remembered about the person because most people think it is bad to speak ill of the dead. Kudos to people who have gone through such similar scenarios and came out top and strong. 😊
Why is the daughter not talking to her father when it was his fiancee who made the offending comment, not him? Is he not allowed to be shocked into stunned silence by such a heartless comment in the immediate aftermath? The fiancee was way out of line. But the daughter not talking to her father over it speaks of a girl trying to live in her grief over her mother and taking it out on her father
Would you want to speak to the man who is marrying the woman that insulted your dead mom? Pretty sure she sees the father as condoning his fiancee's statement. "Why else would he be marrying her if he agreed with her?" That's probably what's going through her mind.
Amanda sounds exactly like my stepmother back in the era when my dad was still alive. Instead of addressing her antics, my father would have us shift perspectives and see things from another light. It was like coping with abuse to the point where you didn't know. It was akin to the boiling frog metaphor. After he'd pass, the truth came out.
I think I speak 4 everyone here when I say
Im sorry 4 ur loss
Tutorial in how to go from fiancée to ex-fiancée in a heartbeat.
That Amanda is a narcissist. How evil is she to be glad his wife died and to say it in front of the dead mother’s kids?
I know being jealous of a dead person is wrong. But the negative feelings and thoughts do creep in. I'm not saying it's valid to feel that way, it just happens. The comparison within the new partner and the previous wife may arise at one point but that needs to be discussed right away between the two parties and not be allowed to fester till it's hard to control anymore. This also needs to be discussed with the kid/s if there were any from a previous relationship because the dynamics would definitely change no matter what anyone says. I think it is ok to acknowledge the happy moments that the previous marriage had but to not let it prevent the new marriage from also having their own traditions and moments being made. Pretty sure the new future potential wife will feel insecure at one point because usually, when a person dies, most of the time only the good things are remembered about the person because most people think it is bad to speak ill of the dead. Kudos to people who have gone through such similar scenarios and came out top and strong. 😊
Why is the daughter not talking to her father when it was his fiancee who made the offending comment, not him? Is he not allowed to be shocked into stunned silence by such a heartless comment in the immediate aftermath? The fiancee was way out of line. But the daughter not talking to her father over it speaks of a girl trying to live in her grief over her mother and taking it out on her father
Would you want to speak to the man who is marrying the woman that insulted your dead mom? Pretty sure she sees the father as condoning his fiancee's statement. "Why else would he be marrying her if he agreed with her?" That's probably what's going through her mind.
The exact reason the son stated. The father condoned the action by staying, so he needed to show action and leave