The Narcissist Makes You Leave

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  • Опубликовано: 28 сен 2024

Комментарии • 426

  • @imezryou2002
    @imezryou2002 2 года назад +19

    got to say it's very odd so many people are dealing with this same issue telling almost the same story this has to be a spiritual entity we are dealing with. this is a demonic spirit we all have encountered.

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 Год назад +3

      I used to be an atheist until a few years ago. And even if it wasn't spiritual, either way you have to go NO CONTACT. I'm afraid I agree that it is a demonic thing. But it's nothing that we nor Jesus can't overcome!

    • @amandaforsythe3729
      @amandaforsythe3729 5 месяцев назад +3

      In the last days they'll be a lack of love people will be lovers of self

    • @desertangelfish140
      @desertangelfish140 5 месяцев назад

      An extremely stunted unevolved soul. These people are nothing more than sleep walkers!

  • @straightcashhomey1261
    @straightcashhomey1261 2 года назад +26

    This is all so accurate. My ex either felt smothered or abandoned. Anytime the relationship progressed toward healthy, loving, and calm she had to ruin it by sabotaging. At one point, we were booking a trip together and after I paid for it she looked at me and said “I afraid I’m going to push you away.” This is when I began to suspect her of cheating, most likely because she felt out of control in a stable relationship. Regardless, Narcissists know right from wrong and just don’t care who they hurt in the process of getting their emotional needs met. It’s extremely difficult for a neurotypical person to comprehend the mindset of someone so mentally ill.

  • @motowngirl5891
    @motowngirl5891 2 года назад +11

    It’s the same feeling as an alcoholic
    It’s and addiction, you have to break the addiction

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +3

      Very true

    • @andrewsmith3257
      @andrewsmith3257 9 месяцев назад +2

      You nailed it. It's hard to get away from these monsters if you end up living with one however

  • @mellymeow1092
    @mellymeow1092 2 года назад +34

    I went back to my narc after a very bad fight and separation. When we reconnected... i initially felt really good about it, because he was love bombing me. Once he took his mask off again, which took literally maybe 2 days, the feeling of dread that came over me was so so heavy. I have never in my life hated someone that i loved so much. I didn't realize this was even a form of abuse or that it had a name. But this is 100% what i went through for years. I was never an angry person, never had anger issues until i started dating him. Even i was astounded by the level of rage he was able to drum up in me. He knew all the buttons to push, and loved to "talk things through." I would try to end an argument, and tell him i wasn't in a sound mind to continue talking. and he would push and push and make me keep raging. watching this and thinking about my experiences really shows me how deeply twisted a person he was. He was literally getting joy out of seeing me lose my mind.

    • @SassyDiva53
      @SassyDiva53 2 года назад +7

      I remember literally putting my hands in my ears like a kid to drown out his arguing at me...he just wouldn't stop.

    • @HippieZippy
      @HippieZippy Год назад

      Them and their freaking MASKS! They wear masks, mask the truth..it's an existence of masks. Masks & Mirrors!

    • @crystalgeter.6294
      @crystalgeter.6294 Год назад +3

      Wow that's Right

    • @l.5832
      @l.5832 11 месяцев назад +1

      My ex was exactly to opposite. NONE of our issues were resolved during our 23 years. He refused to discuss anything the point of finding a resolution. He would walk away, drive away, close a door, change the topic, rage about something unrelated, or blame me for everything. Nothing ever discussed or talked through to a resolution. Needless to say it mounted up.

  • @mumzthewurd1
    @mumzthewurd1 2 года назад +8

    If they realize you KNOW who they really are, they can’t have you around warning the new supply, ruining their image.

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 Год назад +2

      Or also simply because they just don't get their sneaky controlling way that they spring up on their victims anymore that easily as well

  • @breakthrough1019
    @breakthrough1019 2 года назад +157

    That abuse is horrendous … it is rape of the soul .. literally after such a one sided entanglement you are searching for the person you were … a new identity within you comes to be … once you heal you will find that you won’t deal with such delusional toxic sub human people you will develop safe boundaries .. self love .. and you will embrace your alone time ..

    • @eclypticvisions.io49
      @eclypticvisions.io49 2 года назад

      that's exactly how i felt ... raped ... there is no difference between a pedophile and my narcissistic friend ... both take advantage of nativity and good intentions to make you a monster in your own mirror ..... it is sub human indeed

    • @yourbodyandu
      @yourbodyandu 2 года назад +2

      Stay strong

    • @SpIcYMoReNa
      @SpIcYMoReNa 2 года назад +3

      🙌🏽🙏🏽 indeed!

    • @drm9373
      @drm9373 2 года назад +2

      Speaking truth

    • @rustic-charm
      @rustic-charm 2 года назад +2

      Perfectly said! The journey of healing yourself is well worth it! I love it I learned so much!

  • @soeumsoeun4646
    @soeumsoeun4646 Год назад +2

    It was so toxic, and the silent treatment was so painful. He wanted me to discard him. That's what I did. During this time, he had already received money from a settlement. That's why he left. Everything you said, he did it.

  • @phoenixrising8007
    @phoenixrising8007 2 года назад +22

    That slight acknowledgment just keeps you on the hook which buys them time to continue on ...it’s part of the trauma bonding

    • @andrewsmith3257
      @andrewsmith3257 9 месяцев назад

      Yeah and the breadcrumbing and future faking is also terrible. But the abuse is the worst

  • @nadianohelani7413
    @nadianohelani7413 2 года назад +20

    You reminded me of so many horrible things that I forced myself to forget or minimize. I don’t feel as crazy anymore, thank you.

  • @ChildOfGod0621
    @ChildOfGod0621 2 года назад +43

    WOW!!! I over heard my ex speaking to himself and he said “why don’t you just leave so I don’t look like the bad guy?”
    When I asked him later who he was talking about, he called me crazy and denied saying that.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +5

      exactly, thanks for sharing!

    • @Tend2Rose
      @Tend2Rose 2 года назад +17

      I heard my ex talking to himself in the bathroom one day - he said “ ruin the weekend” I asked him what he said and he said, he was just talking to himself. Lol
      Bloody demons!

    • @ellyhughes3040
      @ellyhughes3040 2 года назад +3

      Oh gosh these are the things that happened to me.

    • @cm-yu6gu
      @cm-yu6gu 2 года назад +1

      WOWWWWWW

    • @indeara6313
      @indeara6313 2 года назад +2

      I relate 🙏🏽

  • @Indiana_Blue
    @Indiana_Blue 2 года назад +13

    Yes. I couldnt quit trying with him and he went out of his way to get me to leave. He made me crazy and then pointed out to the new supply- that had been there for a year it turned out. Took me 6 mths to get over it and function. Now he wants to meet and i wont. Told him he can say it over the phone, i cannot risk seeing him in person.

    • @yaileenmaldonadomendez6382
      @yaileenmaldonadomendez6382 2 года назад +5

      Don't see him again, it's a TRAP. That's how the trap you!

    • @Indiana_Blue
      @Indiana_Blue 2 года назад +2

      @@yaileenmaldonadomendez6382 yes i know. I have no intention. I had yrs of him doing that and i wont do it again .

    • @yaileenmaldonadomendez6382
      @yaileenmaldonadomendez6382 2 года назад +2

      @@Indiana_Blue I saw myself in you there for a second! I unfortunately did get trapped 2 times and it was something I couldn't get out of for two more years! Glad to hear you're aware! ❤️

    • @Indiana_Blue
      @Indiana_Blue 2 года назад +1

      @@yaileenmaldonadomendez6382 i knew from day 1. But was stupid and thought i could heal him. He cheated the whole way through with god knows how many and strung me along and badly emotionally abused me the last 2 yrs. Treated me like scum and smeared me. Im sorry you got caught up again - but glad you are free now 🙏🏼💫

    • @MissPrettyNPink
      @MissPrettyNPink 2 года назад +1

      My ex person always try’s to get me to talk over the phone. Don’t do it

  • @bklynqueen5928
    @bklynqueen5928 12 дней назад

    Yes I do. They don’t see what IVE Been thru. They’re all on his side. I’m the bad guy. When I been thru he’ll back n forth.

  • @methoxyll
    @methoxyll 2 года назад +17

    I was completely forced out of my home when I was living across the country with my ex narc bf. I had no choice but to leave when he took me to a concert and tried to get with another woman in front of me, screamed at me when i wouldn't wait in the car for him to talk to her alone. And screamed at me the whole way home about how i was a cockblock and interfered with his destiny..(this was after years of abuse) i couldn't imagine another day by his side after such a betrayal and humiliation.
    I was forced to leave my apartment to be homeless and sleeping on my friends couch. He told me and everyone else that it was my decision just to leave him, he told all his coworkers, his family, everyone about how I abused him and how much of a victim he was. He still refuses to speak to me at all. He told me he doesn't feel bad about what happened. He wanted me gone. He always kicked me out of my home, and i had no family and 2 friends in this state.
    The last he spoke to me was months ago telling me he was going to block me again and call the police if i came back to my apartment for my things, after lying about changing the locks and making a new lease with my landlord. it was his final act of control. I will never forget how horrible he was to me. And having to flee my home in the middle of the night in terror. No closure. No empathy, no remorse.

    • @animaladvocate8938
      @animaladvocate8938 2 года назад +4

      What a nightmare. So glad you got out.

    • @qq84
      @qq84 2 года назад +3

      Why weren't you using the domestic abuse laws on him?

    • @methoxyll
      @methoxyll 2 года назад

      @@qq84 there was little point in bringing the authorities into our situation. He actually used the fact that i wanted to call the police on him before against me. He only ever made threats and lies so when i grabbed my last of my things nothing happened. Sometimes i wish i would have gotten the police involved

    • @qq84
      @qq84 2 года назад +8

      @@methoxyll *Never* warn someone before you call the police, otherwise they get the opportunity to call first and smear you. If you want to call the police, you have to do it *always before* telling the problem about it.

    • @weruleyoudrool
      @weruleyoudrool 2 года назад

      He pushed me into a threesomes when he was under the influence of a drug, said I kept ruining things/opportunities for him. I think I've hated him ever since that and was slowly chipping away.

  • @Gigi-rg7xy
    @Gigi-rg7xy 2 года назад +25

    Yes they push you to break up with them.. my ex acted weird , cold , unemotional for a couple months before the breakup… I confronted him but he would always deny. Until I broke up with him and three weeks later he was in a relationship … go figure . :/

    • @QueenBee-fg1iz
      @QueenBee-fg1iz Год назад +1

      My story 💯 He plays the victim and me the terrible one who abandoned him. He was cheating and is still with her. He recently admitted to his daughter that he started this new relationship before he ended things with me. And he wonders why she doesn’t respect or want a relationship with this woman who knew about me. 😮

  • @barb7124
    @barb7124 2 года назад +1

    I cannot believe you were so correct! I had my plane ticket in my hand when he began to cry and say I never meant for this to happen.

  • @honestlyhonestly1770
    @honestlyhonestly1770 2 года назад +3

    Exactly what happened then blamed me and lied in court

    • @cherryblossom3043
      @cherryblossom3043 2 года назад

      Wow they love taking people to court, The narassist told me that he's going to take me to court so I have all my text messages where he called me a bitch and calling my cell during the night. He was so abusive 😔

  • @l.5832
    @l.5832 11 месяцев назад

    I thought my sister pushed me away because she hated me and that I was an inadequate person. In time, I learned it was because she did not want me to find out that she stole my inheritance from my Dad, she bullied my mother to disinherit me, and according to the hospital, my mother's injuries were not consistent with a 'fall' like my sister claimed. I believe she was physically abusing our mother. Meanwhile, she blocked my number, would not meet with me in person, and avoided me. I thought I must be a horrible person. She was the horrible person.

  • @donitajozechar6582
    @donitajozechar6582 2 года назад +1

    you just read my life

  • @Wendypansingl
    @Wendypansingl Год назад

    My ex husband was drinking so heavily towards the end, abusing our three daughters… he left me no other option but to take our children and run. After I left, his girlfriend dove him home….. and took care of him….
    He never apologized to his kids… he even blocked our kids as he moved on forgetting he had a past with us…

  • @sarahhoffman7840
    @sarahhoffman7840 2 года назад +7

    Ben, I know this sounds dramatic but its true; you have saved my life and my sanity. I am forever grateful, please keep doing the awesome work that you do!

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +2

      Happy to help! This comment inspires me more to continue raising awareness! I Appreciate you

  • @Shut-up-Shelly
    @Shut-up-Shelly 2 года назад +14

    Good morning Ben thank you so much every video just confirms what I have experienced and it is very affirming to know I am not crazy that it really is him and all he does in secret. Your 3 glass video was eye opening too!! Continue on your journey and remember always “the truth sets you free” from the bondage of the lies. Have a blessed day!

  • @AZDC99
    @AZDC99 Год назад +1

    Thank you, SO MUCH, for confirming what happened from my parents and from a few ex-girlfriends...I of all people, who used to think I was a realist, really needed to hear this. (I might accept your twist on the fake reality they presented instead of subconsciously BLAMING MYSELF yet, again!)

  • @tsehayjackson251
    @tsehayjackson251 2 года назад +2

    Ppl spend too much time worried abt what ppl will think. Glad I don’t.

  • @FNChris87
    @FNChris87 2 года назад +2

    I was a stay at home dad for 4 years. Every time I started to catch her in lies and we would argue she would take the kids and run to her parents. She filed for divorce. I got an attorney and she was being investigated. Two months went by and we started talking again. She future faked everything and told me everything i wanted to hear. I moved back which caused my own family to turn away from me. I moved in with her parents, her, and our children. The lies started right back up and so did the devaluation. She did a pseudo apology about her cheating. It was a half truth apology. I found out the whole truth and it somehow was my fault she lied. She got her flying monkey parents on her side even after exposing that she was cheating and using drugs. I was told the most horrible shit by her dad. I left the day my oldest son asked me why his mom, grandma, and grandpa hated me. She re-filed for divorce. Had to go to court on the anniversary of my father's death and was placed on child support and standard visitation. She ended up abandoning our son's on Easter. It's so sick how they don't care about anyone but themselves. How they treat strangers better than their own family. The evil look on their faces when they're getting off on everything they have done and are doing. How they legitimately feel you deserve everything bad they have done to you! Whole world flipped upside down and it doesn't even phase them one iota!!!

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 Год назад +1

      The smirk is either prolonged or it comes through in microseconds. That's when the mask is off. It occurs on the telephone too in auditory versions of the visual. In fact, that last brief conversation on the phone when they couldn't get their way inspired me to go no contact immediately
      No she could have been doing it just spontaneously. But, I'm afraid it fits the profile of a narcissist starting a fight so that you walk away looking back with 20/20 hindsight. Either way, if she shows back up I just have to say, "No, you can't just invite yourself into and out of my life however you please. You're not welcome here anymore!"*
      The problem with letting someone back like that again is it certainly does support the trauma bond theory. And no longer do I have the patience that the tolerance to put up with paying that price any longer.
      *Except for the last sentence, that's a great line that an acquaintance of mine literally used when an ex-wife tried to come back one too many times

  • @antoinettedean1173
    @antoinettedean1173 2 года назад +3

    It's like you were there, everything you said l went through, felt like l was about to loose my mind and l left. It's sad how people look at you like the weak one or villain for leaving though.

  • @johanna77777
    @johanna77777 11 месяцев назад +1

    TY ❤

  • @alwayspositive2896
    @alwayspositive2896 2 года назад

    "One can change"......🤯 boom!!! Thanks!!!💗 you are doing a great service!

  • @FurianXT
    @FurianXT 2 года назад +2

    What a great video, watched a lot over the years, dealing with two of these crazies, one a gf one my non related niece…
    This is perfect information
    Thank you

  • @misstd158
    @misstd158 2 года назад +5

    my thing is if you want to leave leave and stay gone don't keep coming back 🤪

  • @RicklessSanchez
    @RicklessSanchez Год назад

    Correct. Kings and Queens want you out of sight how popular goes and they don't care how poor you look.

  • @nancysmith3317
    @nancysmith3317 Год назад +1

    After months of being ignored except at the dinner table. No intimacy x7years and politics rammed down my throat daily bc I did not agree with his choice he played his card and it worked. And with his name calling to me that was the last fucking straw. He got what he worked so hard to get. I said I want a divorce. Silent treatment x5 months now. I knew something was wrong with our relationship for about 2 years. I thought he was going through mid life crisis. All that time (7) years of being manipulated, cheated on, stole money,property and lies and the biggest ball less coward I will ever meet, he won just that part. But I did not leave. Deny and delay everything in the divorce so far. Smfh. Typical of narcs. Can’t wait to be free and will never look back. If you stay to protect what is yours and wait for the legal system to enforce its law, just know your never can fully heal living in the same house with it. What use to be a home turned evil. I can feel it on every interior wall. Daily use of sage helps. Good luck to all that are going through this evil facade. Much thanks to my hero “Ben” that has helped me through the worst crisis of my life. And through his education I will survive and be free hopefully in the near future 😊

  • @kristendavies4075
    @kristendavies4075 2 года назад

    In therapy from my narc abuse what I find the hardest is that he still don't see hes a narc I have been on my knees begging him to leave and hes sat there and said im crazy I need help I got help and he said my therapist is turning me against him like wtf the nightmares are wreking my life

  • @saidasime3088
    @saidasime3088 2 года назад +1

    But what about if they're living in someone else's home and not paying bills and they don't own the home why is it that they're so parasitic and you can ask them to leave and leave and they won't as long as they have a free place to stay and things to exploit

  • @bluthebadgal
    @bluthebadgal 2 года назад

    I’m not even in a relationship with this individual and they’re effecting my job and school

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад

      they take so much energy off of you. I hope you are able to find your healing!

  • @elsie8966
    @elsie8966 2 года назад

    Has anyone found they had an ex they were not over and that ex was the reason you got treated so terribly. I believe he used me to try get over the long term one that dumped him after him cheating. I think he knows life was at its best with her. She had no kids. Her own money. Her own house. Ten years younger. I was 15 years younger with my own house that I jointly owned with an ex. But I had kids. I could tell that he was obsessed with the ex.

  • @hodgesr32
    @hodgesr32 2 года назад +1

    My ex cheated on me multiple times and made me think I was crazy saying " an eye for an eye" just because a guy liked my picture. If he would break up with me he would tell me not to contact him then get mad because I didn't contact him. 12 yrs of the mind games. Half my family doesn't talk to me because of him.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +1

      It’s all mind games. Crazy.

    • @hodgesr32
      @hodgesr32 2 года назад

      @@RawMotivations right now I just want him to sign the papers for the house but he keeps making excuses why he won't. He calls me a child because I told him not to contact me.

    • @peggynarcsuvivor9073
      @peggynarcsuvivor9073 2 года назад

      @@RawMotivations relentless destructive people almost out 45 yrs married.never knew this but grateful he discarded me.in the same home due to my physical challenges.Keep up your good work you r healing n saving many, Blessings to you.

  • @virgoways2650
    @virgoways2650 2 года назад

    Enough said 💯

  • @debbiepeterson6829
    @debbiepeterson6829 2 года назад

    The only way I'm leaving is a body bag. Let's see who is stonger, evil or good.

  • @paulstewart238
    @paulstewart238 2 года назад

    Love this video

  • @AZDC99
    @AZDC99 Год назад

    4:00--Call me naive here, but I did not know that reactive abuse was so calculated by anyone. I used to think it just ended up that way. I just can't fathom using some sort of pre-planned method to do this because I would never do it myself. I'd just end something if I didn't like, or at least grey rock it until I got out of it. That being said, I have ZERO SHAME in taking the bait and pushing them back. Let them scream it from the mountaintops what a horrible person I am with their ONE-SIDED ongoing recruitment of their Hate Club Of Me (behind my back)

  • @shad5637
    @shad5637 2 года назад

    Thank you

  • @sherrypalmer6276
    @sherrypalmer6276 2 года назад

    That sound just like what I'm going through

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +1

      Im sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better!

    • @sherrypalmer6276
      @sherrypalmer6276 2 года назад

      @@RawMotivations thank you. I have been in divorce court with him since 2020. I am hoping we are at the end of it.your videos have helped. Thank you

  • @DD-es6qd
    @DD-es6qd 2 года назад +7

    do they do that on purpose and what is the point? Is it to later Hoover you or is it just another mind game?

    • @Zanie234
      @Zanie234 2 года назад +5

      So they don't have to take responsibility

    • @BROOK69BANKS
      @BROOK69BANKS 2 года назад +5

      All the above

    • @suzannemaroney4579
      @suzannemaroney4579 2 года назад

      It’s all false hope, more lies, manipulation, gaslighting.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +1

      You may find your answer here ruclips.net/video/_y2U8x_Hh-U/видео.html

    • @ivysmith2537
      @ivysmith2537 2 года назад +1

      Control. The answer to any "why" they do anything...the root is always control.

  • @waragainstmyself1159
    @waragainstmyself1159 2 года назад +5

    Mine literally got me evicted on a technicality. Then hit me with bogus domestic violence charges. We made up, and then we had our 4th kid. As soon as my fourth came, and we were back from the hospital, within a month she was full blown narc mode. Purposelly messing up my sleep, to make me mess up for work. Sabotage, etc. I still was not gonna abandon my kids. So she got me evicted again lol. These people are weak bro. Shes a full blown welfare queen now, living in some dumpy section 8 apartment with my 4 kids. All thinking shes a big balling ass kingpin. Its embarrassing. She literally thinks she is winning in life, does nothing all day long, pawns my kids off onto her enabling parents, all while blaming me for all her troubles. I guess maybe she is living the baller life? Until one day her parents pass away, the free babysitters stop, and our kids are way older, and understand shes a parasitic bum whos only goal in life is to blame others. Im rambling, but im just soul sick with this pos man.

  • @deangerber1797
    @deangerber1797 2 года назад

    I was cast out. First way I've seen this is asked to counseling. I went, then she said she didn't need it. Continued as told I needed it. Counselor separated is and was never allowed back in. Pay the bills tho. Don't be a ass! Then has problem when didn't get alimony. Guess I'm the prick 😳

  • @caroleminke6116
    @caroleminke6116 2 года назад

    ❤️‍🩹 so hard to do this on my own healing journey 🥲

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад

      It is a tough journey and will take a lot effort, if you need to talk to someone let me know

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад

      You can also download NARC App , you can take journals and take on activities. Hopefully that can help you in your healing.

  • @ccturner95
    @ccturner95 2 года назад +1

    Lip service and theatrics. No real change happens.

  • @AshleyJax
    @AshleyJax 2 года назад

    Exactly

  • @rubypaige180
    @rubypaige180 2 года назад +151

    He definitely forced me out, I knew something was underlying because it got worse in the last month I was with him. The digs about my kids, I didn’t do enough, and his false accusations of me with other men. There was so much more but the stress and pressure was just too much. He is still playing the victim.

    • @karenwells278
      @karenwells278 2 года назад +17

      Omg i you just don't no how much this helped me I feel like iam going crazy

    • @phoenixrising8007
      @phoenixrising8007 2 года назад +31

      They pick fights to make you leave so they can cry wolf

    • @sunrisemiller2319
      @sunrisemiller2319 2 года назад +8

      I had this too. I tried to improve the relationship and avoid arguing with him. Even if there were many things I didn't like. But he wanted the last weeks fights and provoked me all the time. And did blame shifting all the time.

    • @escapinghim9889
      @escapinghim9889 2 года назад +4

      I’ve been experiencing the same thing for the past year. I felt sure that he was deliberately causing stress and continuing his addiction to get me to leave so that I’m the one that broke the covenant and not him. Of course he tells me that I’m crazy for thinking that. The reactive abuse hit an all time high and I felt so bad about myself that I decided to do research to figure out if I was a narcissist. That’s where the story all started unfolding. Here I am… still separated. He’s in my house. He’s come off drugs. He’s doing so the right things for his recovery. I told him last night I might need to come home because I fell out with my family. He worked hard to convince me that everything would blow over and all be ok. Many would see this as normal loving reassurance but when you put the pieces together this one has its place. It’s so hard to pull away.

    • @phoenixrising8007
      @phoenixrising8007 2 года назад +6

      @@escapinghim9889 It blows over but always blows back and gets swept under the rug, repeatedly. Cognitive dissonance and trauma bonding are Real. You can recover 💥 you can Heal

  • @wendy5290
    @wendy5290 2 года назад +85

    I stayed a very, very long time. Towards the end I felt so invisible to others, that I had to leave before I became invisible to myself.

    • @hassanchop3622
      @hassanchop3622 2 года назад +9

      I stayed too long and lost myself. Sucks when you have kids you love

    • @wendy5290
      @wendy5290 2 года назад +2

      @@hassanchop3622 sorry to hear this. I hope you are on the journey to reclaiming a wiser version of yourself.

    • @hassanchop3622
      @hassanchop3622 2 года назад +3

      @@wendy5290 well on my way. Hope you are finding yourself also.

    • @Misses-Hippy
      @Misses-Hippy 2 года назад +1

      I am transparent, but safe and fairly comfortable. This will have to be enough. Better than hearing only my footsteps echoing through the house.

    • @wendy5290
      @wendy5290 2 года назад +4

      @@Misses-Hippyso sad, I get lonely sometimes but it was much harder being alone in a relationship.

  • @desertangelfish140
    @desertangelfish140 2 года назад +202

    The constant seeking of attention from other females and talking about his exes, was the tipping point for me to pursue my freedom and happiness from the insanity.

    • @mynewname6806
      @mynewname6806 2 года назад

      Yes I had that too. Seemed to be this trail of exes hanging around on his social media. And it’s like they enjoy mentioning them or allowing you to see them like their posts etc to torment you (triangulation). Horrendous. A real man who truly loves you would not do this.

    • @daisy8187
      @daisy8187 2 года назад +27

      My ex used to constantly talk about his ex wife , ex girlfriend, triangulation with the neighbour, with any female , would make me jealous all the time … took me a long time to see through it. Still went back … finally blocked and deleted 3 weeks ago … healing is a long process:(

    • @Hoops590
      @Hoops590 2 года назад +17

      @@daisy8187 same - and i said all you care about is your exes then i got how dare you bring up my past
      well you kept bringing it up im saying stop - then i got treated like dirt since

    • @daisy8187
      @daisy8187 2 года назад +8

      @@Hoops590 did he tell you all his ex’s were crazy and called the police on him etc ..
      I was an idiot and listened… waiting for him to say something nice about me … went to a birthday do, ended up being one of his bits on the side , she was screaming at him ‘How could you do this to me’ meaning me .. wth , still spent the weekend with him :(
      Hopefully out of my life now.
      Yours ?

    • @MissPrettyNPink
      @MissPrettyNPink 2 года назад +16

      The same thing with the guy I was dealing with. Constantly talking about other women or his ex’s just got tired of it..

  • @spacegirl226
    @spacegirl226 2 года назад +117

    That last moment with my ex husband was him looking hopeful and saying maybe we COULD work it out after all. I'd been telling him we could work it out for years, gave him plenty of chances, but it would require effort on his part. That was just too much to care about me. After ten years of neglect and abuse and pushing the limits of what I would tolerate, giving me the benefit of the doubt and trusting me was still too fucking much for him.
    He tried to manipulate me even as I was walking out the door with kisses and sweet words. "Don't look back. Just don't look back when you get outside. Don't look back."
    He wouldn't even walk me outside to my dad and stepmom waiting with the Uhaul to take me away from my dead life with him. That's how much he cared about me -- he couldn't even show his face to my parents who he hates for five seconds. Threw me out and watched me from the window. He stood there in the dim morning light in our apartment, looking like hell, but I know secretly thrilled to death that me -- his wife, his problem, his forced adversary, his shame, his reminder -- was no longer going to be a source of unpleasantness for him anymore. He got everything he wanted from me, and when there was nothing left after he'd drained me dry, he won. He had accomplished his goal of breaking me and ruining me. I am the bad person because I wanted too much that he wouldn't give. I am the bad person he couldn't please because he didn't bother trying. I am the bad person who left him. I am the bad person who divorced him. I am the bad person. I am the bad person.
    All games. All manipulation. All lies. But at least I know it and understand it now. Thank you, Ben.
    I'm happy to be free. Also, I never looked back. I know how this story ends. I didn't look back because I was leaving nothing of value behind.
    God bless you all.

    • @antonioortega2588
      @antonioortega2588 2 года назад +6

      That sounds so painful but I know that you are going to draw strength from making that hard choice. I recently left my narc wife and totally an accountability thing. Namely for her cussing out her own daughter for knocking over a plant on accident. For 5 minutes. It was brutal to listen to in the next room as her and I were trying to conceive. Not to mention she did not help around the house despite us deciding for her to be a stay at home mom for the past 15 months. She just stayed in her phone all day and ignored the kids as much as possible. This was my 4th and thankfully final attempt at leaving her as we have only been married 2 years. She refused psychiatric help rather just blamed me that she was depressed. I have talked to her about getting help for the past year and she says that she doesn't need it - and my response is how can I buy a bigger house for us when you don't help now? I don't expect perfection as her two young children age 3 and 7 are still learning how to help but there is minimal effort on her part and she spends zero time teaching the to put things away. And worse how can I bring another child in to the world with her when she ignores the two (I have been eye witness to it as I work from home) and does nothing for their development now? And then to go through and verbally abuse them in the process?
      I literally prepared about 85% of the meals while working full time. When I would take my morning break the kids would attack me because they hadn't been fed or wanted some water. She would say "they never asked me," while her head stayed buried in her phone playing games. I was beyond ready to leave, and hearing her just berate her daughter for 5 straight minutes was the point where I had to give her one last chance to get help. I brought it up to her that night and silent treatment. The next day I brought it up again and she refused so I packed a few things and left. My love for her will fade and if she even said she would get help now I wouldn't know what I would do. Blessings to you and thank you for sharing your story. It's hard but I thought I would share mine as it's been 27 days bit each day we get a little bit stronger.

    • @spacegirl226
      @spacegirl226 2 года назад +4

      @@antonioortega2588 Dang, Antonio. There is NOTHING good going to come from that situation, least of all getting her pregnant. She's NOT going to change and there's nothing you're going to be able to do to make her change. She won't get help, and if she does, it'll be temporary to placate you and make you think she's serious. Then a little bit of time will pass and everything will be right back to the way they were, and you'll be in that much deeper with more problems.
      Congratulations for making it almost a month. Stick to your guns. Your principles. Stick to yourself. Trust yourself. Do the right thing for you. It hurts like hell, as you know, but the pain fades and becomes less over time. I feel sorry for those poor children who have to put up with such a deadbeat mom.
      You can make it another day, and another and another. You can do it!

    • @antonioortega2588
      @antonioortega2588 2 года назад +4

      @@spacegirl226 there's something you don't hear every day...deadbeat mom. But it's accurate. Thankful that I was able to get out just 3 months shy of our 2 year anniversary. Appreciate the comment as the energy is just so light without her here and each day is a lot easier than the one b4.

    • @spacegirl226
      @spacegirl226 2 года назад +5

      @@antonioortega2588 I know of too many deadbeat moms. They aren't rare. As our society becomes more narcissistic and self centered, these women become more prevalent in the world. The damage they do to their children is irreparable. It's not fair to those children at all.
      Deadbeats can be either sex, but lord have mercy a deadbeat mother is evil incarnate.

    • @antonioortega2588
      @antonioortega2588 2 года назад +4

      @@spacegirl226 I have never seen or witnessed anything like this. I have 3 of my own children and when my 1st was born, it just changed something inside of me. I was a different young man at 22 and I just assumed all women were born with those parental instincts. The disorders are definitely evil and mess up the hard wiring. This is going to take a lot of work for her to begin to repair, her kids deserve something better. No parent is perfect, but just the daily neglect was a living nightmare.

  • @rosierb852
    @rosierb852 2 года назад +43

    I realised that my ex destroyed my image so that his family would think poorly of me. That I was aggressive, argumentative, and a gold digger. His family were mostly also NPD and ASPD.

    • @spacegirl226
      @spacegirl226 2 года назад +7

      My ex did the same with his family. His parents hate me now. I didn't do anything to warrant that hate. All I did was love their damaged child and try to make him happy. He turned them against me. In hindsight that's fine because they are shitty people, just like their son who they made, neglected, and abused.

    • @memorynelson7441
      @memorynelson7441 2 года назад +3

      I could have written that

  • @korab.23
    @korab.23 2 года назад +21

    They make you leave and then blame you for it.

  • @beautifulsmile4695
    @beautifulsmile4695 Год назад +10

    This is what happened to me however, I fell
    In the trap of reactive abuse. The more he hurt me the more I became angry because I would spill my guts out to him and he would look at me like I was nothing to him. I’m sure this devil has lied to his family about me. He had two failed marriages and other failed relationships hopefully his family people is smart enough to see through the smoking mirrors. This is worst thing I have ever been through next to loosing my Mother. Most people are not capable of understanding the impact that it does to your psyche.

  • @danirichardson7955
    @danirichardson7955 Год назад +14

    The biggest lie mine has said is, "I've been nothing but real with you the whole time."

  • @krissysturgul1677
    @krissysturgul1677 2 года назад +19

    If you choose to leave the narcissist, be prepared for the worst because they will launch the worst attack on you that you’ve ever experienced. I just divorced my husband of 25 years and his revenge on me through out the divorce was unbelievable. He purposely prolonged it for a little over two years with huge attorney fees and really nothing left. But guess what? I made it and I am rid of him. It was all worth it, but it was definitely not easy at all. Good luck to those who decide to leave. God be with you🙏

    • @peggynarcsuvivor9073
      @peggynarcsuvivor9073 2 года назад +1

      Mine served me w divorce .it's been 4 years living in same home w him.marrued 45 yrs,can't go till over have physical challenges. Lots of attorney fees .Judge had to order information that he refused..Needless to say looking forward to peace and healing.

  • @nehachoudhary3806
    @nehachoudhary3806 Год назад +5

    I completely agree with this - the narc does things that they know will trigger you to get a reaction out of you. In my case one of the scenario was about sharing their plans, their whereabouts and availability everyday. They did it so often, over a period of 3-4 years, and one day suddenly started withholding all information. On confronting about the change in patterns, there was a counter question about why do you need to know my availability? I had been so accustomed to their sharing of smaller things about themselves and looked at that as a piece of affection or moreover a way to stay on the same page or even contributing to their life. My confrontation was taken as some form of controlling or mandating behavior and I was made out to be the bad person in the end, to add to their story of victimization.

  • @christineplaton3048
    @christineplaton3048 2 года назад +13

    You keep trying to work it out. You stay for the kids. In the end they DRIVE you away. It's the most pain, shock, stress you can imagine. They act out, you are the only real part of this relationship. Don't waste long years or half your life or more. Don't get sick over them. We are too kind. They have a true mental illness. You can't change them. One narcissist creates plenty of trouble all around them. Everyone else but them seeks therapy. They are destructive people.

  • @mynewname6806
    @mynewname6806 2 года назад +28

    Thank you. It’s great of you to come out and tell us what’s going on inside a narcissists head. You are helping people and that’s wonderful of you.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +3

      Appreciate this :) I wish you the best on your healing

  • @tracimattox2152
    @tracimattox2152 2 года назад +10

    Most narcissist are unaware and they cannot change.

  • @LS-wc5nw
    @LS-wc5nw 2 года назад +27

    The ex narc made me leave, then immediately changed the lock on the doors. I took that as though we were done, then I received an email from them trying to hoover me back. Totally ignored it and moved on.

    • @ellyhughes3040
      @ellyhughes3040 2 года назад +3

      Oh my that is what happened to me.

    • @HVogue17
      @HVogue17 2 года назад +3

      Happened to me. I was hoovered almost 3 years later

    • @andrewsmith3257
      @andrewsmith3257 9 месяцев назад

      ​@@HVogue17oh I'm not going to answer a hoover.. it's gonna be over. I've been dealing with one for 4 years

  • @charlottekyoto9519
    @charlottekyoto9519 2 года назад +20

    Omg this is exactly what my soon to be ex husband did. I think, our whole marriage he never loved me, and would withhold all affection and intimacy (its a miracle we managed to create two children!!!) towards the end, he was clearly becoming nastier and nastier to me and the kids, every day in was like he was recklessly horrible, and I believe he was trying to push me out the door so he could look like the good guy and then I'd be painted as the "terrible wife and mother who abandoned her family" . Well I short-circuited his game plan and reported him to the police...they arrested him and removed him from the property. Hahaha. That was 2 months ago. I qas waiting for "the hoover" but instead he served divorce papers which goes to show he wanted out all along!!!

    • @escapinghim9889
      @escapinghim9889 2 года назад

      The police take it seriously? What if there is no evidence?

    • @charlottekyoto9519
      @charlottekyoto9519 2 года назад +3

      @@escapinghim9889 Yes the police did take it seriously. Luckily I had kept a diary of the last year of the relationship so I had times, dates, specific info that otherwise I'd have forgotten. I also had some secret audio recordings of him being abusive and in rages. I actually got him arrested for coercive control and common assault and removed from the family home. He was bailed to his parents for a month while the police investigation decided whether to charge him. In the end he wasn't charged but by that point he wasn't likely to return home and the police put me in touch with a legal aid domestic abuse charity so I got the non molestation order via legal aid.

    • @pamhughey8922
      @pamhughey8922 2 года назад +1

      Same here 20 years of lies

  • @cherrybacon3319
    @cherrybacon3319 2 года назад +30

    Ps If they had really wanted to try and make it work, they wouldn't have watched you pack your bags and get as far as the door.

    • @cm-yu6gu
      @cm-yu6gu 2 года назад +1

      🙌

    • @rubyredfrog
      @rubyredfrog 2 года назад +2

      Yep. As I was packing my bags he actually walked over them as if I didn’t exist. The ultimate invalidation. It hurt, but it validated everything I knew to be true; he simply doesn’t care. Silence speaks volumes.

    • @cm-yu6gu
      @cm-yu6gu 2 года назад +1

      @@rubyredfrog they are literally crazy

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 Год назад +1

      Which is actually a good example of another power Play of theirs. I used to think that it could be an isolated incident. Nah, it's just part of the sweet/mean cycle. All I could do was get off and stay off of the crazy train FOR GOOD once and for all

  • @nilgiridreaming
    @nilgiridreaming 2 года назад +25

    You are so comforting: I know I did not jump. I was pushed out of the marriage. Manupilation, gaslighting, driving me to react: it all happened. Yesterday I was so angry at myself even though the bustup happened in the 1980s (I'm old). Today, you came up in my feed. You have described what happened to me. I have often said: he does not want to look like the bad guy, to myself, in my own mind, knowing it sounds far fetched. Now you have said this and for those of us who have experienced it can at least understand that particular part of our wounded psyches. Their desperation to look like the good guy is extreme and in my case i was dealing with narcissistic and psychopathic behaviours. I believe I was in danger from one of his women. I believe she tampered with my brakes. Or maybe he did. When I did not crash, and when the car was back in our driveway, he insisted on doing the repair. He is an ace when it comes to 'fixing' cars. THe is also a great actor: crying and slumping over in my mother's kitchen, pretending he missed me. No. He missed being able to leave the children and household duties in my hands, while he played the bachelor, bedhopping around. I also know he had women in the bed we shared, so it was never a place i could call my own. Not even the bed we shared.

    • @musicjunkie31karma
      @musicjunkie31karma 2 года назад +2

      I’m glad you posted this for 2 reasons. One, bc it sounds so similar to my situation and I can totally relate and two, for saying this came up in your feed. I didn’t think hitting the like button did anything but maybe it might! It reached someone who needed to see it and that’s amazing!

  • @scotttully8572
    @scotttully8572 2 года назад +63

    Very confusing moment, yes. They pushed me out, 12 years marriage with two kids, no closure, no working on it... then called back after the separation and said they missed me. When they couldn't come up with a single thing they missed about me, I shut the door forever.

    • @spacegirl226
      @spacegirl226 2 года назад +6

      Yeah, same but without the children. No working on it ever even though I was required to be in it and participate while he did absolutely nothing to help or improve it. Always my fault for everything that went wrong. And I took that blame because I believed I was at fault. No closure, not even a shred of it.
      It's over now, and we can move on. Best wishes on your healing journey.

    • @Beanp2025
      @Beanp2025 2 года назад +10

      I learn to count my blessings, I still have two hands, legs, a head, etc....some victims lost their limbs, their lives, or worse, the lives of those they love.

    • @cm-yu6gu
      @cm-yu6gu 2 года назад +8

      Oh wow. Good on you for asking what they miss about you. They don't know how to take accountability for their emotions. It's not the connection they miss. They don't know how to connect. It's the control and power
      Glad you're out

    • @bernitacenteno1326
      @bernitacenteno1326 2 года назад +2

      @@Beanp2025 Really ? Many loose themselves and become emotionally or psychologically unbalanced BUT IT'S MOSTLY FIXABLE IF REALIZED AND EARLY ENOUGH.

    • @dr.reyj.lebaquin9193
      @dr.reyj.lebaquin9193 2 года назад +1

      More power and wisdom from God...I can relate...

  • @user-rt9pv4ft3l
    @user-rt9pv4ft3l 2 года назад +15

    Why are they so bothered what other people think of them? It is like they spend all their energy to make sure other people view them in the light they want. Why is that? How can you live your entire life based on what the others think of you?

    • @missminti
      @missminti 2 года назад +7

      Mommy only loved and praised them when they did something that made her look good. The shallowness gets inherited. It’s a learned trait from being spoiled and then ignored. They do it because that’s what was done to them.

    • @tsehayjackson251
      @tsehayjackson251 2 года назад

      I guess that’s why this smear campaign is a thing.

    • @weruleyoudrool
      @weruleyoudrool 2 года назад +2

      To be fair, BPDs act similarly but come from a diff angle.

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 Год назад +1

      Because they're weaklings with NO SOUL. (Unless they become a bit more self-aware like this guy at least is doing the video.. this helps keep me safe from giving into myself and giving them another chance next time they just try to invite themselves back into my life)

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 Год назад +2

      One more thing, I found it best not to dwell too much on the flying monkeys and enablers who buy into their tall tale. IF THAT'S ALL IT TOOK for someone to lose respect for you without hearing your side of the story, then good riddance to that bad garbage too!

  • @vhayashi7369
    @vhayashi7369 2 года назад +7

    Yep!!! I wasted 2.5 years total of 5! Because I gave him time to work on the problems and NOTHING CHANGED!!! GET OUT OF the relationship!!! Don't waste your time on Narcissists!!!! I didn't know he was until after I broke up. That's my 2nd bad Narcissist relationship. Been single two years and never been happier!!!! I manifested my dream person and first time I have ever been treated like a real person!

  • @HVogue17
    @HVogue17 2 года назад +7

    Ex did all of this then came back after years of no contact to tell me about the new replacement then ghosted me. Truly sick.

  • @cherrybacon3319
    @cherrybacon3319 2 года назад +14

    When I left my Narcissist he'd fetched up the fact that "I'm only ever with him when I'm skint or nearly skint" he said. This was after I had told him what money (which was enough to keep ME and MY OWN HOUSE going only). After I'd spent a good week at HIS paying for Electric I used etc, food for us, taking HIM out TWICE and giving HIM money to gamble on the bandits and paying for a takeaway on the way home! He KNEW that I'd defend myself. And when I told him HIS real reasons for his accusations (I told him I k ew he was seeing someone else), he hung up on me. He didn't defend himself because he knew I KNEW the TRUTH. We both knew that I would NOT take his shite, hence I blocked him. THIS IS HOW HE GOT ME TO LEAVE. (I got my power dynamics back though by not even telling him I'd blocked him. By ignoring and destroying the hoovering note he posted through my letterbox. 🍒

  • @dauglove7835
    @dauglove7835 2 года назад +11

    Maddening.
    The worst is that my teens were convinced by his manipulation.
    Without support and validation like this video, I may just be in the mad house.
    Blessings

    • @Rosh1199
      @Rosh1199 2 года назад +2

      Such vile and dirty craziness

  • @NikiSchap
    @NikiSchap 2 года назад +13

    Why do we all feel like they were our soul mate? A connection like no other? My best friend? Who teaches you how to do this?

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +7

      Video coming in this

    • @MinaDV5
      @MinaDV5 2 года назад +1

      Looking forward to this video TY!🙏

    • @ARavenSpeaks
      @ARavenSpeaks 2 года назад +5

      Usually it’s a karmic relationship. A soul contract agreed soon before arriving here. All people u meet are soul mates one way or another. The karmic however, is agreed apon by u both in soul form to teach u your biggest lesson in life. If u don’t learn from it, u will get the same experience but with different people. If u learn, ur done. So the connection is deep feeling because it is deep. Albeit not healthy, but we only learn when it comes from a place of soul recognition.. I think.. 🤷🏼‍♀️ idk.. that’s what I have come up with in the last 8 months out of a relationship with Narc type person. All of my relationships have been like this. But it finally clicked with this one. Do ur shadow work and that fuckin person will never be able to drown u in it again 💗

    • @jlynne.7
      @jlynne.7 Год назад

      @@ARavenSpeaks thank uu

  • @SweetiePieTweety
    @SweetiePieTweety 2 года назад +9

    Nailed it to a tee. Undeniable these were the daily executable tactics. Drama case study over here 🙋‍♀️ saying Amen lol. Exactly what my ex did and it was UGLY SMUGLY. He’s such a “good guy” eye roll snark.

  • @smonaful
    @smonaful 2 года назад +9

    Your honesty is comendable. Thank you for being that kind of human being 🙏🏽

  • @AZDC99
    @AZDC99 Год назад +2

    Inside information needed! (Your GUT IS ALSO being CONFIRMED here!)

  • @lisalisavirgowarrior1111
    @lisalisavirgowarrior1111 Год назад +2

    Im out as soon as I have a place to run to and a little cash to survive on.

  • @emmamonroe3311
    @emmamonroe3311 2 года назад +7

    I’m so happy you are making yourself better. It’s amazing! Keep it up. You are calling the kettle black. Thank you! You rock!😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
    You have no idea how much your information means to me. Thank you and bless yourself.🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

  • @lisahansel4216
    @lisahansel4216 2 года назад +4

    So true!
    I went through all those things until I KNEW I did everything I could possibly do for the narc I loved ...until I finally realized the problem wasn’t me at all.
    I can’t help but feel that my husband treated me badly in order to make me leave on purpose , although he completely denies it.
    my husband is an amazing person to everyone else...EXEPT the wife who gave, loved him & honestly had his best interests at heart.
    I don’t know the thoughtful ,helpful , kind man who others describe to me as my husband! these people do not know him at all! And it makes me angry!
    you know , marriage to a narcissist is really an impossible task to go through and no one understands how awful it really is until they have been in a relationship with someone like this, and pastors who instruct wives to stay with these abusers need to study those scriptures quite a bit more because many are void of understanding about marriage and divorce to these demons!

  • @yukitamayo6333
    @yukitamayo6333 Год назад +1

    I’m /I was an exactly the relationship with my BF
    My BF is also alcoholic, PTSD, and narcissistic 😢

  • @kerrysaunders1936
    @kerrysaunders1936 2 года назад +2

    He was most horrid in trying to get me to move out.
    I am his wife and a Narc survivor, waiting for him to divorce me but he is too cowardly too. I told him, this is my home and where I live. I am your wife until I am not your wife. My solicitor told me, do not leave your home a wife. People around him can see him chatting to other women knowing he has a wife. He’s getting a reputation. I remain a dignified silence and sit on the fence, enjoying my life friends hobbies and activities.

  • @robanjel
    @robanjel 2 года назад +16

    Triangulation was a big thing. Mentioning their past sex life with this one and that one. During my final discard, we got into big fights. It’s like they create conflict over something simple to get you angry and if you react, they “win” and have the opportunity to say everything’s your fault. To Discard. My discard involved hoovering me back by promising change for us with couples therapy and church. We went to one session only and day after the fight happened and bam I’m kicked out because she made me angry.

    • @kinshasawilson835
      @kinshasawilson835 2 года назад +2

      This Is Definitely What These Sick Demons Do

    • @ssing7113
      @ssing7113 2 года назад +1

      Same same. Started after week one. Then I head the gamut being compared to every other ex sexually. How they were better and on and on

  • @cristianhernandez2154
    @cristianhernandez2154 2 года назад +1

    i got a name for these creeps they are ' 'soul assassins'' we got to spread the word let everyone know
    about these creeps cause once they run out of victims, they aint. goanna have nowhere to get their supply
    they goanna be forced to get a job.'' jaja i called my kids and friends let them know. what these two-faced creeps are going around and doing to innocent people. '' spread the word'' it's time we fight back
    god has greater power than these creeps it's time to put the Armour and fight this spiritual warfare.!

  • @jillh2186
    @jillh2186 2 года назад +3

    my ex narc waited until he stole half of my retirement.. then I found out.. he turned into the devil…. I left! He would never get real help.. Buh bye evil.

  • @tracymullane8818
    @tracymullane8818 2 года назад +4

    This is exactly what happened to me in the fall of last year. I couldn't get rid of this guy! Needed constant attention from other females including exes and talked about exes constantly, constantly. This one's body, this one that one etc. He told me once he did it to punish me. Then fake tears, fake crying, saying he'll change, go to therapy. Everything you're saying. Until the end when he cheated on me! Thank goodness he moved on.

  • @chantelbaldwin6862
    @chantelbaldwin6862 2 года назад +7

    What you speak of I found to be true. Making the same "errors" over and over using the exact tactics over and over until I finally had enough and walked (ran)away and made him stop. It was the only way to make him stop...by leaving the situationship

  • @itisalright2785
    @itisalright2785 2 года назад +1

    Then why does he keep coming back!?? Stay away already

  • @cindyhoward2406
    @cindyhoward2406 Год назад +2

    My ex did that to me . Pushed me to the limit I had to leave i was going crazy . Now Im the abuser Im the narc in his eyes .

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  Год назад

      They will turn the tables around, blame gaslight and make you feel crazy all at the same time. Hope you are recovering and healing from all that!

  • @VM-yd6zq
    @VM-yd6zq 2 года назад +2

    When it is a neighborhood problem do you sell your home? When it is a job, do you quit in spite of needing the money and growing your career. It appears that there is always a narcissistic individual.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +2

      Boundaries first and formost

    • @VM-yd6zq
      @VM-yd6zq 2 года назад +1

      @@RawMotivations sometimes at work, it is difficult to set a boundary. Tough and tricky negotiation can manage the situation temporarily but there are many sleepless nights.

  • @marinabakopoulou8695
    @marinabakopoulou8695 3 месяца назад +1

    Sometimes, they push others away without having thought of the losses. Their losses. I believe that narcisists are auto harmful sometimes . They are not so smart and intelligent enough, after all.

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  3 месяца назад

      We're here to support you on your healing journey. Take the first step by joining our free masterclass, where you'll learn how to break free from toxic relationships and much more. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass

  • @riasattva2805
    @riasattva2805 2 года назад +16

    Thank you for your insight! This is exactly what happened to me. He pushed me too far and I broke it off. He knew he couldn’t have the control he desired anymore. Im sure his new victim was already lined up. Now he can say “she broke up with me”. Yet, he still kept trying to leave the door open and come back. Nope, I left because I wanted more commitment. I will never be back burner supply or one of his recyclables. He really tried to turn me toxic in the end so he could make himself look better but I walked away gracefully with my dignity. I love what you said, “you made up your mind to choose your health and freedom over your abuse and lack of sanity”. There’s just no turning back once you make the decision and see them for who they really are. You cannot unsee the mask slip. 2 1/2 weeks no contact from him and all the flying monkeys. The fog is lifted and I am finally getting my energy back. And you’re right, usually only one person can change so my success will speak for me! Thank you for all that you do. You are very courageous for opening up Pandora’s box.🙏🏼🙏🏼🕊

  • @cajuncrackerranch7990
    @cajuncrackerranch7990 2 года назад +4

    Thank you for your honesty. I appreciate your contribution to this subject matter.

  • @sarahgrohmusic
    @sarahgrohmusic Год назад +1

    I like watching your channel. But there is no way in hell I would ask you, a Narc to help me with healing. Tried that in my marriage.

  • @orlandonunez9344
    @orlandonunez9344 2 года назад +4

    This is exactly the experience I went through. Thank you for your insight.

  • @mcostilla7603
    @mcostilla7603 3 месяца назад +1

    What if he left our marriage and didn’t want me back??

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  3 месяца назад

      That's a great question! You can discover the answer by joining our free masterclass at www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass.

  • @Joy-zn2lo
    @Joy-zn2lo 2 года назад +4

    I want to take a poll as I decide what I’m about to do. I know I am leaving but I’ve never been discarded before. Both times I have left I’ve snuck out. I’ve only come back because it’s been hard not having a place with a baby. Im leaving again. I can’t handle the way he will try to crush my soul if he is aware I am leaving. Would people who have had a nasty discard advice me to just leave in the middle of the night to protect my mind from a terrible discard since I’ll have my baby? My dignity is hurting at the thought of sneaking out again but is trying to leave in his awareness to risky?

    • @Beanp2025
      @Beanp2025 2 года назад +4

      Leave, just leave. You mean no more than their sofa or table to them. You are only good as long as you're useful, and if you have feelings or emotions it only irritates them. You are not expected to be human with human needs. You exist only for them to abuse in order to gain or feel better about themselves, that's all you're good for. Most of us don't understand what we're dealing with.

  • @chriswalls5831
    @chriswalls5831 2 года назад +9

    I could've stayed but I left knowing it wasn't gonna work also seen god do miracles after I left got much farther ahead also other people told me leave and told her let's just be friends but she wanted to be together said let's work it out it will get better

  • @jesselopez7323
    @jesselopez7323 4 месяца назад +1

    This is 10000000% true. ❤

  • @LeonaPayton
    @LeonaPayton Месяц назад +1

    They didn't know how to love or receive love

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  Месяц назад

      Hi there I would like to invite you to be a part of this free masterclass discover how to break free from toxic relationships and empower your self by gaining clarity, certainty and confidence here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass..

  • @rockyortiz7190
    @rockyortiz7190 2 года назад +1

    Help! It's to much ...it feels as if l'm about to die ...

    • @RawMotivations
      @RawMotivations  2 года назад +1

      Would love to help you on your healing journey. If I can be of help feel free to grab a time here at www.calendly.com/rawmotivations

  • @jane4726
    @jane4726 2 года назад +8

    Yes. The final straw was finding out about another gf, the third. This time he got lucky and it became physical…after he denied me a physical relationship for all our married life. We were married for 22 years, two daughters…he flew into a rage when i asked for my financial resources to be returned; I needed to stop work as I was cracking up. He said no…then the gf crawled out of the woodwork. He was surprised that I was strong enough to leave…he didn’t think I’d proceed as I’d threatened it before. He was a coward. Today is the first day of my new life…my decree absolute was declared today.