Free download: Suspect someone you know might be a narcissist? This free guide breaks down the phases of abuse to see if you recognize them from your experience: www.commonego.com/checklist
@@stormyweather9038my ex-wife of 14 years died about a year and a half ago. I'm still upset about the way she treated me. I don't seem to feel anything about her passing. It only bothers me a little bit for a little while. I wonder if I should be more upset but I'm not.
Yes, after 18 years of getting the shit beaten out of mentally and physically, not to mention sexual abuse, then coming back to abuse as an adult: I feel nothing toward him. The attempted guilting falls on deaf ears. Not to mention all the video footage of what this person has done. I honestly dont give a fucj what this person or anyone else they spend time with has to say. These men really want to have sex with themselves. Permanent turnoff.
If you move a mountain, you moved the wrong mountain into the wrong place! But _even if I did_, I'm worthy of forgiveness. I'm worthy. I am enough. I am to be respected. I am to be loved. Because I am a person, and a person is worthy, a person is enough, and a person is loved and respected.
I finally left him 2 months ago. Absolutely NO contact. The freedom to be "me" is a joy that has finally come back and I feel as light as a feather. I feel emotions I haven't felt in years. My friends and family are back in my life and are such wonderful support. And, yes, I am OK and excited about life again.
There was a moment in this friendship relationship that she made me feel as though I wasn't even worthy to be in the same room with her. I was verbally attacked by her with other people in the room.
They want to desperately devalue my life so bad that they'll use voice to skull to have these negative conference calls about "my ways" as I'm on speaker. They need to know I'm hearing the insults because when they do this behind my back I'm not affected. Due to knowing who I am and striving to do better. They really pull out everything in their tool box
It is scary how accurate this is. They all seem to act in the same way, like they are all acting according to the same book or something. It took me a long time to finally realize and radically accept what was happening. Despite psychotherapy, I am still struggling though after narcissistic childhood and 2 back to back narcissistic relationship and situationship. All social interactions demand a lot of energy from me. I became hypervigilant, noticing all the red flags around me. I find it incredibly hard to relax, let alone trust anyone.
I nearly fell into the trap of getting into a long term commitment with a covert Narcissist, I had been previously married to Covert Narcissist it nearly killed me. The thing I realised is that during that marriage and probably prior to it I had never seriously respected my instincts, what a costly weakness that has proven to be. I have since learnt to never ignore my instincts/intuition, this time all the alarm bells were ringing and I got the hell out. Interestingly, I felt a very real fear although it took me some time to work out where that fear originated. To no small degree I have clips like this one to thank in no small part. Throwing out uncomfortable qualifying questions and not accepting being fobbed off with her BS answers certainly brought the underlying problem out into the daylight. The love bombing manipulation can be so alluring.
The more I learn and see how plain the abuse I was suffering was the angrier I get at my last therapist who never called him out as a narcissist or his behavior as abuse. I had to find out through the internet.
I just came off a four day road trip with my narcissist. Not even 24 hours into it and he was violently poking at every single one of these. It was the definition of hell on Earth.
I feel like I'm stuck in a game with these types. With my aunt it's like arguing is a tennis rally, with my brother it's trivial pursuit (he constantly fact checks me with his iPhone) and with one of the committee from my local community garden everything feels like I'm stuck playing chess. One mind job after another
@@CommonEgo Big brother and I are no longer talking. I'm going to keep my aunt at the "exchanging Christmas cards" level, but the community garden guy is going to be a bit tricky as he's the treasurer, membership secretary and secretary and keeps "helping me out" with my plot. It is of cause unwanted help. I am unsure about the rest of the committee but the chairman seems to be a flying monkey. Mr chair has even started dressing the same as the covert narc. Both wear boiler suits to parade about the site like a pair of thuggish horticultural nightclub bouncers
News just in: the com garden AGM is at the end of the month and hopefully, as the covert narc has been on the committee for 5 years he should be resigning his post (you can only have a position on the committee for no more than 5 years). So, hopefully I can get back to calmness and leave my hyper-vigilant hulk sleeping in his compost heap.
I am 61 years old. I have been married to a narc for 39 of those years. I grew up neglected, dirty, poor..whatever...I can't even type the story...Today...there is no solution but more pain.
Both my parents and my husband of almost 50 years were controlling and manipulative. I am finally free at 68.. It's strange though, and I'm trying to navigate life outside of this prison.
Great video, thx Christina. So right on! I’m 3.5 months out from splitting up from my ex. I’m starting to find myself again, claiming my joy separate from the confusion I felt with him. So grateful for your coaching support, it’s truly helping me! 💫🙏🏽💫
Any time I struggled with my depression, she would punish me by leaning in hard on my abandonment core wound and taking the kids on day or weekend trips without me. Leaving me at home to battle with major depression all by myself.
The betrayal hit me hard. The broken agreements and promises. Its horrible. I went through this twice with the same person. I initially thought their behavior was just ADHD but then they triangulated and discarded again especially when I was doing bad in life and reaching out for help. The disappointment I could have managed but they not only disappointed me they also “discarded” me. Luckily even without knowing much about narcissism, I had ensured one boundary for myself - that if this happens again - I am out. However I am ashamed that when I did cut them out of my life, I was also pretty narcissistic. I know its my codependency but that is the other problem, I have no trust in my own belief if this person was really a narcissist all along - and I thought highly of them. In my discard I broke their trust too - and I am still not sure if that was a win even though it felt like one at that time.
My X left me for a rebound guy after a few years together. Little did she know that I moved on gracefully and she over played her hand. In the end she will get what she deserves.
I was going out to dinner with my narcissist father every 2-4 weeks. After I found out about Grey Rock Method, I used it on him at dinner when he threw an insult. All the sudden he started to forget about going to dinner(ghosting, abandoning me). I knew he was forgetting on purpose to punish me because he thought I needed him to pay for my dinner because I wasn't as wealthy as him. I used his ghosting me to go no contact.
Who am I to feel special, why should anyone call to me? I remember feeling like someone and when you looked at me I felt like I was actually seen. I should have known Your eyes seemed so sincere, how did I let my guard down so low? All of the evidence to the contrary I kept straight ahead aiming for your heart, not knowing the trap was set. I was already bled. With precision the knife did its work. Cutting here, healing there. Soothing words Hurting silence. The play and the game went on. And I played along Chasing that feeling of being seen, being loved. Off again, and on again we went. Silence and depression. Love and affection. The end result was my confusion and I know that was the goal that was the need Here, now at the end I concede. You win. I allow you to win. I could fight on. I know more now than I knew then You just aren't worth it to me. I am hurt, harmed and wounded But at least I am free.
I know that feeling. I look in the mirror, and see the person I was and I don't want to be, but she has to take responsibility for her part. Sometimes these people have a way of pulling our toxic behaviors out of us & act in ways we shouldn't.
I constantly think about what I could've of done differently to keep the relationship from crumbling. Maybe if I said the right things, or been there for her when she wanted me to stay the night? Maybe could of bought her more gifts? Maybe made future plans with her and her son. She wanted to get married, but once I said it was too soon and her son needed behavioral counseling she did a 180. After that, i think she lost interest and went into a downward spiral and treated me bad.
My EX would gas light me in public by saying I was embarrassing her or ruined her day out. I would believe it, then retaliate by screaming at her to defend myself. Afterwards I would regret it. I begin to believe I'm the narcissist. Sucks.
I'm not a doctor so, it's not my job to diagnose or treat any mental illness. Your not supposed to even tell people they are narcissist, it's really up to them or not, if they want to figure out what's wrong with themselves and whether or not they want change themselves or not. If they don't see a problem with their behavior, they will never try and change.
I agree that we shouldn't go around telling people they're narcissists. And yes, it's up to them to change if they want. These videos are purely for people affected by this type of abuse. It can be helpful and validating to know what you're dealing with 🙏❤
Hi mrs. Cristina, i congratulate you and i really appreciate all these advices and tips you give us on your channel, it is very difficult to manage a relationship with a narcissistic parent for a child who is not yet of legal age to decide for himself for his own life. What communication or living advice can you give to children living with a narcissistic parent. Thank you and have a nice day❤
It’s BEYOND disgusting the $$$ you charge for “coaching” people that have suffered through not only God knows how long and how much insidious, insufferable abuse and damage, but are so desperate for healing they are willing to pay anything, including those like you who prey on their vulnerability. May God have mercy on your soul
3 nights ago after listening to a couple more of your videos and getting zero sleep/ packing up his crap, I realized that I needed to cut all ties FOREVER, WENT SILENT, still silent even tho they're trying to ruin me, I decided to not be so silent in the sense of listening to George Michael's song "FREEDOM" over and over and over again!!!!!!!!! 😊😊😊😊Thank you so much for showing me the way! ruclips.net/video/diYAc7gB-0A/видео.htmlsi=HTcbVn1gYRVa6CS8
It feels like injustice. But. I have real intimate connections with people who care about me. My ex might put on a flashy and charming front, but its a mask covering an ugly and lonely person that will never ever have real love for anyone else. And no one can love these kinds of selfish monsters for too long. Not really. You might feel trapped but they are the ones that cant ever change or eacape the pit of shame that narcissistic people live in. They try to blame others for how shitty they know they really are to the people close to them. We arent trapped. Narcassists are. They have chosen to live in a dillusion that hides a really ugly personality. The best thing we can do is show them tail lights as we find ways to live a full and connected life. Narcassists have no idea what love is. Not really. The hells they live in are the justice. They.might not have built the prison they live in, but they sure as hell maintain it and try to trap other in with them. Getting almost a year into no contact, i can see my ex's attempts to get attention for what they are -pathetic and hollow.
Free download: Suspect someone you know might be a narcissist? This free guide breaks down the phases of abuse to see if you recognize them from your experience: www.commonego.com/checklist
I was raised by one. The daily cruelty was unbearable. When she finally passed I felt nothing.
I'm sorry to hear you went through that and I hope you've found more peace in your life 🙏❤
Oh dear, really hope you find some peace very soon 🙏🏽
@@CommonEgoU U U 7u yuh U ut
@@stormyweather9038my ex-wife of 14 years died about a year and a half ago. I'm still upset about the way she treated me. I don't seem to feel anything about her passing. It only bothers me a little bit for a little while. I wonder if I should be more upset but I'm not.
Yes, after 18 years of getting the shit beaten out of mentally and physically, not to mention sexual abuse, then coming back to abuse as an adult: I feel nothing toward him.
The attempted guilting falls on deaf ears.
Not to mention all the video footage of what this person has done.
I honestly dont give a fucj what this person or anyone else they spend time with has to say.
These men really want to have sex with themselves.
Permanent turnoff.
I trust my intuition so much, I can sense lies naturally...No joke! 😠
The up & down, the in & out, the back & forth. They blank you out.
And it's impossible to understand what that feels like unless you've been through it 🙏❤
Yup. Just like the Katy Perry song I sent to my ex a long time ago when I was sick of being on his roller coaster!
The more you give the more they shatter you.
@@CommonEgo Exactly 💯
If you move a mountain, you moved the wrong mountain into the wrong place!
But _even if I did_, I'm worthy of forgiveness.
I'm worthy.
I am enough.
I am to be respected.
I am to be loved.
Because I am a person, and a person is worthy, a person is enough, and a person is loved and respected.
I am worthy of love respect and happiness
I am worthy of love, respect, and happiness.
I am enough!!!!
I trust myself and my intuition, finally! 😃❤🙏✌
Awesome! 🙏❤
I finally left him 2 months ago. Absolutely NO contact. The freedom to be "me" is a joy that has finally come back and I feel as light as a feather. I feel emotions I haven't felt in years. My friends and family are back in my life and are such wonderful support. And, yes, I am OK and excited about life again.
I am enough! ❤
There was a moment in this friendship relationship that she made me feel as though I wasn't even worthy to be in the same room with her. I was verbally attacked by her with other people in the room.
I LOVE and RESPECT MYSELF!
Tragically, the scars may last a lifetime
They do. Bill Fisher
People are resilient and time is healing. Nothing has to last your lifetime
@@fuzzynipplemanthis shows you haven't really experienced horrific abuse.
They want to desperately devalue my life so bad that they'll use voice to skull to have these negative conference calls about "my ways" as I'm on speaker. They need to know I'm hearing the insults because when they do this behind my back I'm not affected. Due to knowing who I am and striving to do better. They really pull out everything in their tool box
It is scary how accurate this is. They all seem to act in the same way, like they are all acting according to the same book or something.
It took me a long time to finally realize and radically accept what was happening.
Despite psychotherapy, I am still struggling though after narcissistic childhood and 2 back to back narcissistic relationship and situationship. All social interactions demand a lot of energy from me. I became hypervigilant, noticing all the red flags around me. I find it incredibly hard to relax, let alone trust anyone.
I am worthy of love, respect and happiness
I was betrayed by her for cheating on me. I had to walk away because that was a deal breaker for me.
I nearly fell into the trap of getting into a long term commitment with a covert Narcissist, I had been previously married to Covert Narcissist it nearly killed me. The thing I realised is that during that marriage and probably prior to it I had never seriously respected my instincts, what a costly weakness that has proven to be. I have since learnt to never ignore my instincts/intuition, this time all the alarm bells were ringing and I got the hell out. Interestingly, I felt a very real fear although it took me some time to work out where that fear originated. To no small degree I have clips like this one to thank in no small part. Throwing out uncomfortable qualifying questions and not accepting being fobbed off with her BS answers certainly brought the underlying problem out into the daylight. The love bombing manipulation can be so alluring.
The more I learn and see how plain the abuse I was suffering was the angrier I get at my last therapist who never called him out as a narcissist or his behavior as abuse.
I had to find out through the internet.
Same here! Good luck! ❤
I am WORTHY of love, respect, and happiness!
Once again. Spot on. Hit almost all the benchmarks of my 22 year marriage. So thankful I was able to finally get away.
I just came off a four day road trip with my narcissist. Not even 24 hours into it and he was violently poking at every single one of these. It was the definition of hell on Earth.
I am enough and respect myself enough to walk away from the abuse
I feel like I'm stuck in a game with these types. With my aunt it's like arguing is a tennis rally, with my brother it's trivial pursuit (he constantly fact checks me with his iPhone) and with one of the committee from my local community garden everything feels like I'm stuck playing chess. One mind job after another
Sounds frustrating. Can you cut down the engagement with any of them? That could help you maintain more of your peace
@@CommonEgo Big brother and I are no longer talking. I'm going to keep my aunt at the "exchanging Christmas cards" level, but the community garden guy is going to be a bit tricky as he's the treasurer, membership secretary and secretary and keeps "helping me out" with my plot. It is of cause unwanted help. I am unsure about the rest of the committee but the chairman seems to be a flying monkey. Mr chair has even started dressing the same as the covert narc. Both wear boiler suits to parade about the site like a pair of thuggish horticultural nightclub bouncers
News just in: the com garden AGM is at the end of the month and hopefully, as the covert narc has been on the committee for 5 years he should be resigning his post (you can only have a position on the committee for no more than 5 years). So, hopefully I can get back to calmness and leave my hyper-vigilant hulk sleeping in his compost heap.
ON POINT. AND I AM ENOUGH
I am 61 years old. I have been married to a narc for 39 of those years. I grew up neglected, dirty, poor..whatever...I can't even type the story...Today...there is no solution but more pain.
I am worthy of love,joy and respect.
I trust my intuition.
Both my parents and my husband of almost 50 years were controlling and manipulative. I am finally free at 68.. It's strange though, and I'm trying to navigate life outside of this prison.
Great video, thx Christina. So right on! I’m 3.5 months out from splitting up from my ex. I’m starting to find myself again, claiming my joy separate from the confusion I felt with him. So grateful for your coaching support, it’s truly helping me! 💫🙏🏽💫
I trust my intuition ❤
I trust my intuition
I love and respect myself
I AM ENOUGH!
Any time I struggled with my depression, she would punish me by leaning in hard on my abandonment core wound and taking the kids on day or weekend trips without me. Leaving me at home to battle with major depression all by myself.
I Trust my intuition!!!
I am enough!
The betrayal hit me hard. The broken agreements and promises.
Its horrible. I went through this twice with the same person. I initially thought their behavior was just ADHD but then they triangulated and discarded again especially when I was doing bad in life and reaching out for help. The disappointment I could have managed but they not only disappointed me they also “discarded” me.
Luckily even without knowing much about narcissism, I had ensured one boundary for myself - that if this happens again - I am out.
However I am ashamed that when I did cut them out of my life, I was also pretty narcissistic. I know its my codependency but that is the other problem, I have no trust in my own belief if this person was really a narcissist all along - and I thought highly of them. In my discard I broke their trust too - and I am still not sure if that was a win even though it felt like one at that time.
I am enough
My X left me for a rebound guy after a few years together. Little did she know that I moved on gracefully and she over played her hand. In the end she will get what she deserves.
I was going out to dinner with my narcissist father every 2-4 weeks. After I found out about Grey Rock Method, I used it on him at dinner when he threw an insult. All the sudden he started to forget about going to dinner(ghosting, abandoning me). I knew he was forgetting on purpose to punish me because he thought I needed him to pay for my dinner because I wasn't as wealthy as him. I used his ghosting me to go no contact.
Thank you so much Christina for sharing. Just what I needed.
Who am I to feel special, why should anyone call to me?
I remember feeling like someone and when you looked at me
I felt like I was actually seen. I should have known
Your eyes seemed so sincere, how did I let my guard down so low?
All of the evidence to the contrary I kept straight ahead
aiming for your heart, not knowing the trap was set.
I was already bled.
With precision the knife did its work.
Cutting here, healing there. Soothing words
Hurting silence.
The play and the game went on.
And I played along
Chasing that feeling of being seen, being loved.
Off again, and on again we went. Silence and depression.
Love and affection.
The end result was my confusion
and I know that was the goal
that was the need
Here, now at the end I concede.
You win. I allow you to win.
I could fight on. I know more now than I knew then
You just aren't worth it to me.
I am hurt, harmed and wounded
But at least I am free.
I am worthy ❤
Thank you for your videos 🙏🏼
I am enough❤😊
I may be a narcissist and I know and have evidence to support that I’m not worthy of love.
I know that feeling. I look in the mirror, and see the person I was and I don't want to be, but she has to take responsibility for her part. Sometimes these people have a way of pulling our toxic behaviors out of us & act in ways we shouldn't.
Are u doing ok ? I feel it’s still hard for you to talk about this which is understandable 😘😘Thankyou for your hard work xx
I was getting this also
I constantly think about what I could've of done differently to keep the relationship from crumbling. Maybe if I said the right things, or been there for her when she wanted me to stay the night? Maybe could of bought her more gifts? Maybe made future plans with her and her son. She wanted to get married, but once I said it was too soon and her son needed behavioral counseling she did a 180. After that, i think she lost interest and went into a downward spiral and treated me bad.
I've just realized if narcs didn't exist, with no matter what else has happened in my life, I'd be ok..sadly they exist...
This is crazy
i am enough.
Im having a hard time escaping this...nothing i do is ever right its killing me
My EX would gas light me in public by saying I was embarrassing her or ruined her day out. I would believe it, then retaliate by screaming at her to defend myself. Afterwards I would regret it. I begin to believe I'm the narcissist. Sucks.
I'm not a doctor so, it's not my job to diagnose or treat any mental illness. Your not supposed to even tell people they are narcissist, it's really up to them or not, if they want to figure out what's wrong with themselves and whether or not they want change themselves or not. If they don't see a problem with their behavior, they will never try and change.
I agree that we shouldn't go around telling people they're narcissists. And yes, it's up to them to change if they want. These videos are purely for people affected by this type of abuse. It can be helpful and validating to know what you're dealing with 🙏❤
Hi mrs. Cristina, i congratulate you and i really appreciate all these advices and tips you give us on your channel, it is very difficult to manage a relationship with a narcissistic parent for a child who is not yet of legal age to decide for himself for his own life. What communication or living advice can you give to children living with a narcissistic parent. Thank you and have a nice day❤
It’s BEYOND disgusting the $$$ you charge for “coaching” people that have suffered through not only God knows how long and how much insidious, insufferable abuse and damage, but are so desperate for healing they are willing to pay anything, including those like you who prey on their vulnerability. May God have mercy on your soul
You’re so wrong,everyone knows you’re wrong.
3 nights ago after listening to a couple more of your videos and getting zero sleep/ packing up his crap, I realized that I needed to cut all ties FOREVER, WENT SILENT, still silent even tho they're trying to ruin me, I decided to not be so silent in the sense of listening to George Michael's song "FREEDOM" over and over and over again!!!!!!!!! 😊😊😊😊Thank you so much for showing me the way!
ruclips.net/video/diYAc7gB-0A/видео.htmlsi=HTcbVn1gYRVa6CS8
It feels like injustice. But. I have real intimate connections with people who care about me. My ex might put on a flashy and charming front, but its a mask covering an ugly and lonely person that will never ever have real love for anyone else. And no one can love these kinds of selfish monsters for too long. Not really. You might feel trapped but they are the ones that cant ever change or eacape the pit of shame that narcissistic people live in. They try to blame others for how shitty they know they really are to the people close to them. We arent trapped. Narcassists are. They have chosen to live in a dillusion that hides a really ugly personality. The best thing we can do is show them tail lights as we find ways to live a full and connected life.
Narcassists have no idea what love is. Not really. The hells they live in are the justice. They.might not have built the prison they live in, but they sure as hell maintain it and try to trap other in with them.
Getting almost a year into no contact, i can see my ex's attempts to get attention for what they are -pathetic and hollow.
I trust myself and respect myself.🥰☺️🫂🫶👂
I am worthy of love, respect and happiness
I love and respect myself
I trust my intuition.
I trust my intuition 💜
I trust my intuition
I am enough!
I am enough
I AM WORTHY OF HAPPYNESS AND REPEAT AND EVERYTHING ELSE GOOD ONLY❤
I am enough
I am enough!
I am enough!
I am enough