The breastmilk story infuriated me. I'm a pediatric PA, and there's not enough research to suggest that breastmilk clears ear infections. Also was the infection in the ear canal (otitis externa) or behind the tympanic membrane (otitis media) because if it was behind the TM, the breastmilk wouldn't even touch the infection. That aunt definitely should have asked. Also, breastmilk does go bad eventually and could absolutely cause an infection in the canal. 🤦🏾♀️
That is one of the strangest ways to treat an ear infection and I would be disgusted if I had a child and someone did that to them. It isn’t proven and the sister in-law shouldn’t be putting that in a child’s ears. It could of possibly made the infection worse.
By that time, they would’ve gotten antibiotics for the ear, and it would’ve most likely drained out by that point. Yes, not a lot of research has gone into it, but how much does it’s really affect the ear? And you’re right it’s behind the drum. It won’t do anything it will just drain out of the ear. Olive oil is literally prescribed to loosen up earwax. Kitchen olive oil. You don’t think that some contamination with that?
@kimberlyjanzen412 While I get what you're saying, olive oil is not a bodily fluid. Breast milk goes bad long before olive oil would. And I have personally never suggested a parent use olive oil to loosen up ear wax. There are drops for that.
Story 3: Didn't OP's boyfriend say he was going to hurt himself if she left him? Aren't we gonna talk about that? 😅Pretty sure that is the worst form of manipulation.
Yeah I’d be done with that guy. I also think he was a cheater during the relationship and he for caught. If it was a one night stand how does she have his contact info? He was playing his gf all along and got cocky and got caught.
Story 2, my brother died at 18. Not as young but still.. This was the most horrible day of my life. I was LIVID when I found out someone brought their baby when it started crying mid service. And I didn't even know the person. Funerals, especially tragic ones are no place for babies. 23:57
Wife’s reaction bothered me so much, someone lost a family member and she’s mad about leaving a baby for an hour with a trusted family member? I would have left her at home with the baby.
On breastmilk: the article that Morgan read as the first result was from Ameda which is a brand which sells breast pumps through insurance. I have found 0 peer reviewed or scientific studies to support those claims. They are anecdotal at best. (Also BS on the cancer stuff, or else we wouldnt see babies with leukemia)
Thank you! Sometimes googling and accepting the first source isn't always the best practice. Morgan was mid-recording and doesn't have time to fact check in depth on-the-fly so I'm not really mad about it. But I was skeptical enough to scroll down to the comments to see what other people said about the breast milk haha
as soon as she said “i googled it” i knew she just looked at the first thing that popped up lmfao… there’s absolutely no way it targets cancer cells. it’s like they heard “antibodies” and said “well those fight toxins, therefore, it must-“ yikes
My ex did this! I didn’t realize that what he did to me was an actual method! It literally sounds like him, how everything was written, it sounds exactly like him
Breast milk and bandaids are VERY different Morgan. Breast milk can transmit diseases and I think that parents should be included in treatment plans BEFORE they happen.
Re: the breast milk ear infection I’m a postpartum nurse, teach a women’s health college course, and am a breastfeeding mom. I would be LIVID if a family member or friend put their breast milk in my kid’s ear. Like OP said it’s a body fluid, you don’t know what diseases the sister in law has (HIV, Hep C, etc.). Even for giving babies donor breast milk in the hospital parents must sign a consent for the risk of developing a disease from someone’s body fluids. Also, and this is because I am a nursing professor, the first page of google that says “3-4 drops in the ear is fine” is not a peer reviewed source for evidence based practice. What is beneficial regarding breastfeeding and ear infections, is for the infant who is breastfeeding themselves. The saliva in the baby’s mouth helps trigger the mom’s body to develop antibodies that will then be delivered to the baby orally from the breast milk. That’s not to say topical or otic application isn’t advised, breast milk baths have helped with my child’s diaper rash/eczema. There are a number of studies currently happening that are investigating these very things and we just need more data to definitely say this is a cure. However, again, breast milk is a body fluid and OP is NTA.
All of this!!! I was wondering what the source was and whether it was peer reviewed. I'm a pediatric PA and would never tell a parent to use breastmilk for an ear infection. Especially for a kid that isn't theirs.
Re: Breastmilk - That sounds so completely unhinged to me. Do NOT ever put your bodily fluids full of your germs into my child, much less without explicit consent! Do not ever give my child non emergency medical treatments without my explicit permission. Just dont.
Breastmilk story: I am also a nurse and would be horrified if another woman put her breast milk in my child’s ear, family or not. HIV can be transmitted through breast milk which could be theoretically absorbed into the blood vessels in the ear. Very small chance but still a chance. OP would not know sister in-law’s health status and most people with HIV do not know they have it until it’s progressed. I would not want any treatments completed by babysitters without my consent or prior review of an allergy list. I’ve had patients allergic to adhesive from bandaids/tape and topical creams. She’s still an asshole for not allowing unsupervised contact, like you said an in-depth conversation of boundaries and a second chance is warranted.
Yea, I was gonna say I don’t care if the SIL was a certified nurse, this child was not hers! She can make all the decisions for her own children, but has to ask for permission for another child!!
Not to mention most ear infections in this age group are otitis media and occur behind the ear drum, the BM wouldn’t even reach it, it’s actually not backed by science at all. Also as a health care professional who works in paediatrics, don’t put substances high in sugar near a potential bacterial infection, that’s a terrible idea.
As someone who struggled with postpartum depression and anxiety... I appreciate Justin understanding and putting himself in her position while defending his. That's what it's about! 👏🏼
why is no one talking about the LAST STORY??? that was the craziest thing i’ve ever had to process like what is WRONG with him. he sees no value in himself and resorts to mind games and bs. that is belligerent
My ex tried to make a rule that we couldn’t talk about our relationship with other people because it was “our business” … realizing it was because he didn’t want people telling me things he did/said were not okay…
2 HOURS?! YES!! I’ve been rewatching old episodes and this makes me so happy!! It’s really gotten me through college! Congrats on the engagement btw! May you two both have a lasting and blessed union!
The "we broke up 2 weeks and he had a baby" story: the threats to his own health if you leave is a huge, huuuuuuuuuuge red flag. Cash your loss in and get out, he's gonna hurt you (make sure he has people around when you leave him though, just in case. Speaking from experience here)
Straight up, threatening that to keep someone from leaving you is an act of abuse. Also sadly speaking from experience. I hope OP safely gets out of the situation soon.
Also: him not using a condom with the girl and then getting back together with his gf within 2 weeks means he was possibly exposing her to STDs without her knowledge (some tests, like HIV, can't even be accurately performed that soon after exposure). There are so many bad signs in this story.
I've been looking for comments about this story!! Like everything went out the window on potentially mending everything the SECOND! She said he was making threats about himself. ABSOLUTELY NOT!! RED FLAGS ALL THE WAY
Something else I picked up on was how she says she's given up so much for him. She's missed out on friends, family, things she's wanted to do etc. It very eerily reminds me of a relationship I had where I was sort of slowly secluded to only being around that person and making sacrifices for them and was easier to manipulate because of that. That plus him threatening her if she leaves are huge red flags that stood out immediately to me
Story 2…holy shiz. Does that wife have no empathy? Also, her reaction when he and his mother got home from the funeral, would be it for me. You never forget how someone treats you during a time like that
Morgan, I think the problem with the breast milk in the ear story is that the woman did this without OP's permission. If she suggested it to OP as a potential treatment, that would be one thing. But not waiting for permission and just acting without thinking what the parents would want is no way for a babysitter to act. Imagine if it were essential oils or something harmful that SIL thought could "help" the baby. Whether it's helpful or not, you don't give babies non-essential medical treatment without parents' permission.
No, listen to the rest of the story before you type something out. OP's problem was "eww icky gross" which is weird and sexist. SIL is a literal pediatrician, she prescribes this to her patients, it is a real thing that does work often better than medication. She did what all mothers do, and OP acted as though she hurt her child. She put her own bias before her child's wellbeing. If the problem was the fact she didn't ask, then that's a "Hey in the future can you tell me first" conversation, not a "omg u disgusting monster you're not allowed near my child" reaction. She even said she'd be okay with her giving her Tylenol, something that a child can OD on and has side effects, but not BREASTMILK? Yall are just dumb. Breastmilk works, it's not some "holistic" remedy, Doctors recommend it, it's completely uncomparable to essential oils, read a book.
As a nurse, she should know there should be consent for treatment. Or that the doctor makes the decision for meds and treatments and the nurse administers the medicine after the doctor prescribes and the parent consents
@@Shortypants403 she is not a nurse, she is a literal doctor. And sure, she should have, but this was a HUUUGE over reaction and you're enabling it by trying to place blame on the SIL.
@@buddingbonesBreastmilk is amazing for helping fight ear infections - all of those antibodies. Also, it takes all of two minutes to pick up the phone and give mom a heads up. Had she done so, she would have realized this wasn't something OP was comfortable with. Taking unnecessary shots at people while making your point isn't exactly the hallmark of intelligence, hope your day gets better.
@@diamcole Thanks for reiterating what I already said. I'll absolutely take shots at people who side with an asshole. To coddle OP and claim their actions - to withhold family from someone over a conversation that didn't need an escalation above "Hey give me a heads up in the future" - are just based on a mundane formality is insanely idiotic, and me calling it out does nothing to diminish the point of my argument, so get off your high horse. What OP did is borderline abusive towards SIL; to hold her own daughter hostage from family members over a petty formality is shitty, and like it or not, it does say something wrong about your character to act like she was justified in that.
The breastmilk story-- The line for me is when she argued with OP. She gave the baby a treatment without checking, which at first was an innocent slip up. OP then communicated that she didn't appreciate that and she argued that "it wasn't a big deal" and continued to double down. As a nurse, I'd like to see what happens if she minimized the wishes of a parent she's working with like that. This probably wouldn't have escalated if she'd just accepted the feedback and promised not to do it again. She wasn't banned from babysitting because she did it, she was banned because she argued the point and OP has no reason to think her wishes will be respected going forward.
For the breast milk story I exclusively breastfeed my daughter and I use the milk for her skin and occasionally put it on myself as well. BUT I would not give it or put it on anyone else's kids without asking or the parent asking me. I personally wouldn't want anyone giving my daughter their breastmilk without asking first. I think that's the issue for me is just having the conversation and asking.
That's my biggest issue. There are SO many other reasons I could give for why this probably isn't safe, but at the end of the day, SIL did a medical thing without ASKING FOR CONSENT. And judging by the WAY she presented it, SIL probably knew OP doesn't really believe in homeopathy so she's just doing it to "prove her wrong". Spite-dosing your niece with something her mom wouldn't consent to is wild.
That last story is horrifying. I’ve wondered if people know they are being abusive and he writes it down and post to the internet. That’s a scary thought.
Great episode! Breast milk/Ear infection - Morgan I am really surprised at the stance you took. While breast milk is the closest thing to liquid gold, I don't think applying it to a child, even topically, that is not yours and unbeknownst to their parent is a good move. Breast milk can also transmit disease. Several viruses, including HIV, can be transmitted via breast milk. I would be pissed because it demonstrates a lack of good judgment to do that without permission.
I came here from Spotify just to comment this! I was so surprised by her take as well. I would 100% put my own breast milk in my kids ears (and have before) but would be absolutely livid if someone else did it with their breast milk. There is a reason why donated breast milk goes through rigorous testing before it can be transferred.
Mayhaps i am missing a joke but that was why she specifically pulled that as an example. She was trying to show him an equivalent of negging that would in theory apply to him
Story 1 - NTA. Yeah maybe it was childish but don’t make work harder for people doing you a favor, that’s honestly worse in my opinion. The wife was super dismissive of OP asking her to keep the dogs out, and I’d probably have just walked off the job and told her to find someone else willing to put up with her purposefully letting the dogs in and making a mess. I hate people who don’t give a damn about the time of people doing them a favor and add to it by doing stupid shenanigans like that. She can be a big girl and paint her own walls while her dogs run free in the room.
I'm always baffled by people that stand up for people like the wife in the story. She was inappropriate in her actions and should have apologized. If I were op, I would sit down with her and explain why I was offended. I would demand an apology. I guess some people are stupid entitled and feel like they deserve things to be done for free
If he actually wrote “Fxck”, not the AH but if it’s “F you” “Bxtch” or “cxnt” then I’m on the wife’s side. But regardless, if it’s that big of a deal and warrants an apology in their eyes, they should not be trying to get him to come back in their home.
i think ESH. i think it’s disrespectful to write profanity on someone else’s walls but he definitely has the right to not help them FOR FREE anymore lol. and they shouldn’t blame him if he isn’t welcome back.
The red pill story is really scary because it’s giving dark romance novel to a certain extent. It’s crazy that people are playing that out in real life. It literally sounds like forcing Stockholm syndrome. 😢
i agree. I love dark romance books and morally grey characters, however- real life? ABSOLUTELY not.. thats psychotic.. i really hope that poor girl gets out.
One of the FUNNIEST parts of the story about the moocher and her boyfriend was down in the comments of that post. It turns out that the moocher's boyfriend wasn't just taking the ribs - HE WAS TAKING THE HOST'S CONTAINER TOO! Talk about entitled 😂
For the breastmilk story… I knew breastmilk helped and that’s super nice to try and do that. However, as a Mother… I just personally feel its gross to put your breastmilk into another person’s kid. Like… no they’re not eating it, but it is absorbed and now that child has her antibodies in them forever PLUS anything else the sister took. What if the Mom doesn’t want that? It’s her right to say what treatment her child receives. Even if the SIL is a nurse, that doesn’t give her the right to decide for another Mom. I feel like there is very little harm to put a band aid on a kid. BUT what if the child you’re watching has an adhesive allergy? ALWAYS ALWAYS ASK. Now in an allergy situation Mom or Dad should tell sitter of the issue. But if it’s not stated don’t just do it if it’s not immediately necessary. And please don’t put something into a child that contains remnants of your DNA without asking the parent first. You NEVER know. This is a huge violation of trust. I don’t know if it’s relationship ENDING. But I can definitely see the Mom’s line of thought. I might say start there and give her a chance to earn it back. She had good intentions. But we all know what the path to H*II is paved with.
For the breastmilk story, if it can be remedied with your basic first aid kit, it's fine to do so without permission. If not, ask the parents first. Simple.
My neighbor's cat scratched me when I was a kid and the mom called my mom to ask about using neosporin. Boundaries were crossed here, the sister isn't a medical professional, so a phone call was warranted.
Came here to say this! Basic, age appropriate, first-aid is OK! ANYTHING ELSE, ask. I do still think OP is overreacting, though. SIL clearly meant well and was super honest about it.
It really depends. Scratched knee? Band-aid and let the parents know. Medicine? NEVER. let's say it's a headache, would you know if they are allergic to anything? if not then don't even try. Hell, I remember a case in which a doctor passed out and was only getting worse in the ER, then when they finally contacted the doctor partner, they learned they were allergic to latex, to which point she was A BUNCH AROUND THEM, the reason she passed out was because the hospital trying to spend less money bought latex gloves instead of rubber ones and didn't notify anyone, she put on the gloves and passed out few minutes later without knowing what was wrong. The hospital got sued and lost and the doctor really got too close because of greedy and proud fellas refusing to call the family, if they did rght away, the partner would have told them the allergy, heck they didn't even bother looking on her information for it.
Breastmilk story--Even daycares are not allowed to give kids anything (ie neosporin, sunscreen, lip balm, and diaper cream) without permission. Thats why parents have to fill out a lot of forms. I have 2 kids and personally, I would never want someone else's breastmilk in my child's ear. 🤮
@@Imjustkendall Because it's high in sugar (worsens bacterial infections) and carries viruses SIL may have (think HepC). Not every health/sanitation concern is born from sexism child.
@@Imjustkendall my opinion is because it’s an entirely different persons immune system in MY CHILD, I would definitely want someone to ask. Not because it’s “sexual” … because it’s fluid that comes out of a persons body your child isn’t familiar with. Just my take. It would be best to ask. Maybe her own breast milk could have been appropriate, if that’s the way she wanted to go. Yes good intentions, just an iffy outcome. In my opinion.
@batmanoncrackKKKKKK you do realize STIs and stuff transfer in milk. Imagine if she had herpes or hepatitis. You need to put the phone down and get out of your weird bubble and relax.
@@Imjustkendall I am a mother. I breastfed my child until after he was 2 years old. In public too. I don't have an issue with breastmilk jewelry for example. But even in a Google search you can find out breastmilk does nothing for the most common ear infections (which are for the middle ear), it might work on external ear infections. However, since it has sugar (lactose), it might also make it worse. And also might carry some other infections. Finally, a mother's milk changes according to the baby's needs. So a mother's milk MIGHT work for an external infection of her own breastfed baby. Oh, and the fact that she is/was a nurse means nothing, in my opinion. There are so many DOCTORS in my country that prescribe antibiotics without blood tests or anything...
Story 6 guy definitely reminds me of the other man who would constantly tell his SO everyday that she stinks, to the point that she took multiple showers a day and constantly applied deodorant and had other people telling her she smelled good, but she still stayed until Reddit made her realize something was seriously wrong with their relationship. Turns out it was some psycho tactic the guy learned from his dad who apparently told him that if you criticize/ tell her all the time she sticks, then she’ll never leave you because her self esteem is so low basically. It’s psychotic
I think the breast milk thing was just weird. I understand that it can work but either way she should’ve explained it to the mom first before doing it. OP was probably shocked at the idea of it, rightfully so, and it’s hard to snap out of that and listen to an explanation when you had your parental voice taken away from you in that moment
This and I thought breadt milk anti bodies was specific for your baby I could be very wrong so font quote me but I heard your body knows when your baby is sick and your breast milk changes dependant on that not someone else's child plus I'd be grossed out if a grown woman medical professional or not used their breast milk for my child in ear mouth or a bath it would be strange especially since your ment to be an aunt not another mother figure
To the child loss story, this is literally something I lived. My child passed at 8 months and we had a funeral for her. That entire time I was on autopilot except for when you snap out of it to break down and cry. Those parents aren’t breathing, eating or doing anything that isn’t already drenched in grief and for a FAMILY MEMBER to be selfish and make that time harder… no she isn’t worth their time.
Yeah you’d think with her PPA she would understand. I couldn’t even imagine wanting my baby at a funeral. Not the place and not the time. Once you have a child you have to learn you don’t get to do what you want you have to put baby first and in this case it means staying home. I’m sorry for your loss! ❤
Story 6 was so scary and it genuinely feels like what happened to me, though I don’t know if they did it so intentionally. My ex removed his mask one month into our marriage but I felt trapped. I got lucky actually that he left me a year later, Jesus Christ how awful.
Breast milk story: don’t put fluid in your child’s ear unless it’s something prescribed/recommended by the pediatrician. Maybe as a topical treatment with the parents’ permission.
@Kennedyvernengo They say she's a pediatric nurse I believe which does lend her some credibility sure but the point is she's not that child's nurse/doctor and she did not consult the child's parent before administering a treatment the parent did not agree to. I'd be fully on board if she'd consulted with her niece's parents first, but just squirting some milk in the kid's ear without asking is kinda weird. And definitely crosses some boundaries. The op definitely went a little overboard on the reaction and maybe there's context we're missing but relatives and doctors shouldn't give children meds or home remedies without permission.
@@Kennedyvernengo Not really. Just because you're a doctor does not mean you're allowed to treat patients without consent. A conversation was definitely needed beforehand. The mom could do research herself to see if she'd feel comfortable with it or not. I would never take it upon myself to treat someone's child even if I was educated unless maybe it was an EMERGENCY
Props to OP on the 2nd story, I’m glad he was able to keep his composure while being empathetic, it’s completely understandable that she’s struggling with the PPA, but at the end of the day, that event is an event of grief & it does not center around her. That’s the end all.
27:34 The comment “seeing a baby didn’t add to our grief”. YOUR grief. Yours. This is about someone else’s grief who has kindly asked OP to not bring baby along to their own baby’s funeral. My take is that people grieve differently and this is not a wild request. It was done with respect and understanding between OP and his sibling during what will likely be the worst time of the sibling’s life. But I’m not all the way through this story, so I’m going to keep listening. Hoping for a healing outcome ❤️🩹
Story #1- Them getting mad about what he wrote in Primer is the equivalent of your mom reading g your diary and getting mad about what you wrote (IMO).
this is probably my favourite episode of justins! its refreshing to see two people mesh so well and he is so emotionally intelligent and empathetic. happy for you morgan. love you guys
I genuinely got chills at 42:58 with Morgan saying the right person will be there. Literally awoken something so deep and I really needed to hear that. Love you Morgan❤️
This last story is triggering for sure.....sounds like the confessions of my abuser. It is terrifying to live it. I am so thankful that he found someone to cheat on me with and finally left. I am so so grateful for her. I pray she doesn't suffer how I did but I thank God for that woman. If it wasn't for her, idk if I would have made it out and then found my current fiance. I pray this girl found a way out too
That is so similar to my story. I NEVER would have left my abusive relationship if they didn’t cheat on me. I’d like to say I would have been strong enough to leave but I just know I wouldn’t have. This was years ago but I always say I am so grateful for that cheating.
@@amandaleighplans I was the same and I tried many times but he always guilted me back and locked me in for a while. Him making the decision was the only way out. It is great that you were able to get out too! I am so sorry you had to go through that! I wish I could understand HOW it happens HOW they can be one thing and then one day just different but hearing that story about the game.....just made me think...Nah idk if I really want to know anymore than what I just did.
Glad you found the courage. It takes alot. I know from experience. It took me getting a molar pregnancy and him totally dismissing me and my needs to wake up. I'm so glad that wasn't a actual pregnancy because I would've had his kid. Think he was upset the baby didn't stick. Because I'm pretty sure he wanted to trap me in the relationship
Last story is scary, this sounds just like the relationship my best friend is in :( she's so lost in the middle of it though she can't see. I've been trying so hard to show her how wrong it is :(
I was in a very similar relationship, it was so hard for my friends and family because I was so blind to how toxic everything was, it’s so hard to see anything but the storm you’re in and eventually it just becomes normal, I hope she realizes it’s not normal or okay:( all you can do is be there for her when she decides to break free, she will definitely need support when that happens and the best thing is to have her write down the reasons she decided to leave/the things that were bad in the relationship, because he will try to convince her to come back and she has to remember the reasons she left, I’m sorry you and her are going through this :(
Story 5 is actually so sad to me. So many people (including me) allow themselves to be taken advantage in this way and the fact that they have friends saying they were wrong for saying anything.. ugly behavior
I’m shocked at the dismissal and minimization surrounding the breast milk situation. A simple google search isn’t enough to say she’s over reacting. I’m completely deaf in one ear as the result of recurrent ear infections as a child. Shower water gave me infections. NEVER put anything in someone’s ear unless it is prescribed by a doctor or okayed by the parent. This is genuinely gross behavior because it crossed the mothers boundary. That breast milk didn’t do anything at that exact moment. It didn’t do anything for the pain, the sister in law decided she knew what was best to treat it and took away the child and moms consent. We shouldn’t teach child and people to ignore their boundaries because it “could help”. Give THEM the option of self determination to do it THEMSELVES. The daughter has continued issues with this, SIL couldve reached out at anytime and offered her the knowledge about breast milk for ear infections and empowered them to do the best for themselves rather than making that decision for them because they assumed it was helpful. NTA.
I completely agree. The minimization and confusion as to why the mother was upset is odd to me. They should ask a child’s parent before giving ANYTHING to that child. Doesn’t matter if it’s a proven home remedy or not, that is not their child and that’s ok. It’s not a tough situation to decipher as they are implying by their responses. This is a boundary and it deserves respect. I also believe it is completely different from something such as topical Neosporin or bandaids. Breast milk is a bodily fluid, it’s a wonderful one for sure, however, it is still something I would consider asking a parent permission on if i was planning to put in a child’s ear. Especially since it wouldn’t even be my own child. The sil may be a pediatric nurse BUT is not that child’s pediatrician or parent.
But OP said Tylenol would’ve been fine. So a medicine with artificial flavoring and dyes, that is doing NOTHING to fight infection, was cool with her. But a natural antibacterial treatment, from a person (with a pediatric medical background) that she obviously trusted enough to watch her child, is unacceptable? Idk that’s weird to me.
Except it is a real thing and yall are being whiney and this attitude stems from "ew women are gross". Breastmilk is literally liquid gold and can heal A LOT. They're the asshole because they acted as though the SIL physically harmed their child when even pediatricians will tell parents to put breastmilk in their infants ear. Her problem wasn't whether or not the milk would work, she thought, "eww icky gross gross" and not only disregarded the fact it helped her child stop suffering, but acted like SIL was a pervert and therefore couldn't be near her niece. The SIL is a LITERAL pediatrician, she prescribes it to her patients because that's the best solution apart from medication! Maybe listen to the whole story. OP is the asshole.
Story 4: Honestly, I would not be okay with someone putting breast milk in my child's ears without consulting me first. This is not a "normal" treatment and in general, before administering any type of medicine, I would hope they would call me first (as someone that has a lot of allergies to regular medicine, it just makes sense to ask before you give the medicine). And even if I was asked, I would probably say no - it is just weird and the only scenario in which I would give my child breast milk for ear infection is if we had no other medicine, the doctor's office is not open and this is the only option.
for the breastmilk story.. as a mom i honestly wouldn’t care cuz it would save me from going to the doctor cuz i know the benefits lol but i do let the sitter know that she can give medication such as tylenol/ teething meds but to make sure it’s the correct amount. idk i thought all parents talk about this beforehand but i can see why the milk was weird for them and upset them. edit: also forgot to add but the mom might have felt upset because as a mom you feel like your the only one that can make your kid feel better & someone else doing that might strike a nerve.
Also with that story, the father (ops husband) was perfectly fine with it. So what if one parent says it’s fine? I don’t think she did ask her brother, but would the mom still blow up if her brother said it was fine? Just something I thought about. Also breastmilk is amazing. Recently my family got pink eye. I put breastmilk into my eyes. Gone within a day. Everyone else struggled for weeks, even after getting medication.
@@XXemmz101XX i feel like she would still blow it up if she hadn’t agreed because to her it’ll always be weird since to her it’s somebody’s bodily fluid & that’s weird to some people no matter the benefits breast milk has for these kind of things. but yes breast milk is amazing! sadly i ran through my stash. it’s weird cuz i would’ve been grateful that she did that for me cuz ear infections are tough on babies/kids and that’s a quick fix
@@SA23240 it's not just the weird part though. Breast Milk can transmit HIV, Hep B, Hep C. No way anyone is using it on my child without my prior consent.
depends on the person I would definitely not be okay with anyone using their breast milk on my kid. because I think all body fluids are absolutely disgusting. and I'd definitely take a long break from using her as a babysitter. if she's willing to do that to my kid what else are you doing to my kid?
Also, if you feel like you need to hide something your partner did from your loved ones because it will make them "look bad" it is definitely a red flag...
The breastmilk one... it is so unhinged that anyone would think it's okay to give another persons baby a substance IN THEIR INFECTED EAR without consent of the parent!!! There was NO consent, therefore it should not have happened. This one is so basic and I'm shocked at the take on this today.
I’m also shocked, it could have been a miracle cure, the point is consent! If something happened what would you say to that mum ??? I would be terrified that you’ll make decisions about my child without my consent in future in other areas, not ok.
Exactly. I don’t have my own kids but I babysat and worked in centers for years. Unless it had been previously discussed, you NEVER give a kid any type of treatment (besides something like a bandaid) without asking parents first. I was also shocked by their take on this one.
Breastmilk can also pass diseases etc like any other bodily fluids. I do not think it is okay to put bodily fluids on or in any child without consent. That is disgusting and I would agree that possibly not allowing her to babysit is appropriate. Depends on how receptive she would be to the criticism.
story 1- the wife is being ridiculous. OP is going out of the way to help his friend and the thanks he gets is some sass?? oh hell no. OP is helping with all the repairs for free, the wife is being extremely unreasonable…the word was painted over. that’s nicer than what i would’ve wanted to write. also the wife was almost going out of her way to make his job harder by not watching the dog while he is painting their house…for free.
also i’m very curious to know if he was paying for the supplies or if they were. it wouldn’t really change my opinion but it would make the wife look even worse if OP has bought all the supplies and had to buy even more because the dog got the primer all muddy.
@@katec188i also wondered the same, it’s already frustrating to have your work slowed down by the situation but if your money was also tied into it? I’d be livid. Paint isn’t cheap, especially if you’re getting the good stuff and how many coats/how big the room is.
los accidentes pasan, quizás ella está tan acostumbrada a estar sola en la casa que se le olvidó que había alguien pintando, no importa. La reacción si importa, no se disculpó, no se ofreció a lavar la ropa, si estuvo trabajando todo el día no almorzaron juntos?, no le ofreció algo para tomar? no se sintió mal por hacer su trabajo más difícil? claramente me veo a mi mesma o a mi mamá abriendo la puerta de los perros por error, es un descuido y puedo puede pasar, pero las acciones consecuentes no y mucho menos enojarme por ver una estupidez pintada en la pared, si es un amigo de mi pareja pensaría que esta descargando frustración más que dirigiéndola hacia mí. No pensaría en tratar a un trabajador así y menos a un amigo que me esta haciendo un favor
I’m going through something very similar to the last story…but the difference is my partner is an addict. It’s like dating multiple people. It’s terrifying and traumatizing but it’s so hard to leave. Especially because even people with an illness deserve love, even if they are harder to love sometimes
@@hannafournier2321 thank you! We actually had a big explosion today where cops were called. When you choose who you date, you accept consequences and that’s the hard part. But peace is coming ♥️ I wish you the best
@@KaileySmith-x8i That's so scary, I hope you're okay. I completely understand as I was in a extremely toxic relationship for 7 years, I'm happy to say that I've been out of it for 2 and have never felt more at peace. I know there is hope for you too, you are so much more capable than you know! ❤
Breast Milk Story- Pediatricians are split on the use of breastmilk for ear infections some say it can help others say don't do it, it can cause more damage. She should have asked and breastmilk is only as good as the person producing it, if I don't know what you ingest into your body on a regular basis I don't want your breastmilk for my child
I've only ever listened to the podcast on Spotify but I RAN to RUclips to leave a comment about the breast milk. Applying stuff inside the ear is not just topical. It can be absorbed through the bloodstream through the round window membrane (I'm not a medical professional though, just a google search). Swapping bodily fluids with a baby is NOT COOL especially when it's not their baby and they don't have the parents consent. What if the aunt had a bloodborne pathogen that they didn't know about? This is on the same level as the mother in law trying to breastfeed, that's my take. It was a huge lack of consideration of the aunt and entirely inappropriate. What other things could the aunt overlook when watching the baby, even if this wasnt intentional harm? It was definitely not an overraction to limit contact. Your take was HOT though and that's why I'm here:) love always, thanks for the great content
Paint story: Bruh the first thing I painted in primer on my walls was a dickbutt. The wife is being an entitled weirdo, and the fact that she's making a big deal out of this instead of being thankful this friend is doing all this work for FREE, and not falling all over herself in apologies for the dog situation is super gross.
Okay I never comment but the story about breastmilk, I would probably react the same tbh. As a mom myself, that's really freaking weird and it was especially weird of the SIL to not ask or anything before taking matters into her own hands. Like yeah she didn't think before doing what she did, but at the same time it's very violating I feel. Literal body fluids into a whole child that's not yours. We don't know what's in SIL and what could be transferred somehow lmao it's baffling how disrespectful and how far the overstepping went in that. Everybody is different I guess, but I would react the same. Don't do things to my kid without asking me or letting me know before you do anything. I'm getting full-body chills thinking about somebody putting breastmilk into my child's ear just because from how revolted I am on it lmao Edit: I don't care if she's experienced or what her job title is. If it's not your kid, don't be an ass. Simple as that honestly.
story 4: one of those stories where I am confused by yalls reactions lol, but the rule of thumb is if immediate action is needed, take it- ie a cut? treat the cut and band-aid, thats a no brainer. If the kid breaks a bone, take them to a doctor and call guardian asap to let them know. However in a situation with an ear infection, it's been infected, it's being treated by a doctors prescription medicine that the parents have agreed to. No further action was needed from a caregiver other than maybe administering said medicine. putting your breastmilk into a child's infected ear that was already being taken care of and healing through traditional methods under guidance of a doctor is insanity and concerning behavior. This coming from a kid who had many ear infections and was raised by Indian grandparents who have their own non traditional medicine beliefs. Even they asked my parents and me before trying one of their methods on me, and they wouldnt ever try that if I was already receiving care. like this is the biggest WTF situation ever. idc if google says it works, it wasn't a necessary action in the way a bleeding wound is.
Here’s my Crazy Coincidence story, if anyone’s lookin: In 8th grade I went on a school trip to New York and DC over spring break. Other schools do this too, as I discovered when we would go to the destinations and find other class groups from different states taking similar tours. Well, when we were in New York, one activity we were able to do was watch Wicked on Broadway. The theater was MASSIVE, and I’d never been in such a large auditorium. It was pretty dim in there as well before the show as we all found our seats. As I’m sitting with my class, I hear my name get shouted, only it’s my nickname that only people I knew from before 7th grade could have known me by, as I stopped telling people about it once I had multiple teachers throughout the day in middle school. I look around and see my friend that had moved away from California 4 years prior to Colorado, and her family, at the same show, the same night, SOMEHOW in the same seating area, thousands of miles away from home as I was. Being with her family, she was not on any sort of school trip. The fact that she found me in a sea of people in a dimly lit auditorium was insane, and I still can’t believe it happened. I honestly can’t imagine any sort of unbelievable coincidences happening to me ever again. What are the odds?
Story 5- Thank you for spreading awareness!!! The tactics used by these absolute psychopaths need to be able to be spotted so these shit lickers can be exposed and left alone and miserable. Trust your gut!! If you're questioning their sincerity and love they don't love you. It shouldn't even be a question. I left a relationship like this over 11 years ago and I am still healing from abuse although I have a great husband now who is so loving.
Last little pallet cleanser: My aunt sent my mom a picture of my dad when he was younger… my little brother is a SPITTING IMAGE of my dad when he was a kid. My brother saw the photo and thought it was his twin he never knew about. My mom would go out with us to the store and stuff and due to my dad’s profession random people would come up to my mom in the story and ask if he was my dads kid… mom of course was skeptical and never gave the truth but. Crazy how the world works in mysterious ways.
Story 4… if the wife gave her brother and SIL a facial moisturizer and after using it she told them “I mixed in my husbands sperm.. it’s said to be good for the skin!” I’m sure brother and SIL would understand why OP is upset REAL QUICK
In relation to story 3: when you said a lot of women tend to be the ones making the trip or doing the extra step for the man, it hit hard. I just got out of that situation and broke up with my long distance bf of 5 years. Im still sad but I realized he was manipulative and controlling, and he wanted me to move to him even though I needed to finish school, and I’d be paid significantly less. He wanted me totally vulnerable and by myself so he could have power over me, which is something Im trying not to let traumatize me lolol I find a lot of comfort in these episodes, especially when I hear almost my exact story. Thank you for being here for me two hot takes gang 🥺😭
he also told me he was “wasting the best years of his life” because i wouldn’t move to play house with him, when my life wasn’t ready to be up and moved yet
I think with Story 3 - kind of where you guys almost went with it… there’s a difference between “your kid fell down here, so i gave her neosporin and advil” and “i know your kid suffers from chronic ear infections so i gave her a new treatment you’ve never heard of”. like what if the kid already had drops in her ear from the doctor and the breast milk could’ve badly reacted with it? Idk if that is possible or whatever, but i think the line has to be drawn with giving a child that isn’t your own treatment for something that isn’t an *immediate* injury that happened on your watch. you know what i mean?
but, i do agree that family dynamics may be at play and maybe OP overreacted a bit… but i’m sure it was scary to hear that your child was being treated for something without your permission!
@@TheKmyrtle1you have to remember breast milk can carry many diseases and viruses and STIs not say the sil has any of that but you can't just put your breast milk into the ear which is connected to the brain nose and mouth of a child that isn't yours
Totally family ynamics.... my mother was like 'if they are not dying, dismembered, or brain injury, dont call me. Something sounds like they do not have a great relationship already.
The fact it was done without the moms permission is crazy. Especially putting your on fluids in another child's ear without asking. That totally grosses me out. I asked my husband, and he agrees.
Weird coincidence story so my friend’s husband had a brother that passed away at a young age. Now my friend and her husband have a daughter and my friend’s mom was shopping at a used book store and found a Franklin book. She bought it and when she opened it she saw it was written out to the husbands brother
If you're watching someone else's kid, the rule of care _I_ followed as a nanny, was that ANY MEDICAL TREATMENT THATS NOT AN EMERGENCY, If not previously discussed, ALWAYS RUN IT BY THE PARENTS FIRST. Even simple, incredibly common treatments, _including neosporin,_ can also have incredibly common, unintended, side effects. Neosporin contains a small amount of broad spec antibiotics. One which Im personally mildly allergic to, and is an incredibly common allergy. Roughly 11% of people have some form of allergic reaction to it. Application to my skin leaves a gross blotchy rash, especially when the scrape or whatever it was, broke through the thinnest top layer of my skin. The worst reaction was after a scraped knee, so... it doesn't take much for a lot of us lol. But if I came home to my kids leg like that, and a babysitter hadn't even asked? I would be pretty irritated. With google at hand, I do think the mom in that breastmilk story majorly overreacted. An initial irritation, is understandable. But not sharing in the initial post that she's a pediatrician, tells me that she KNOWS she overreacted, and is intentionally hiding major details for ego validation. Hopefully the constructive comments were able to show her she needs to chill.
Story 1 Literally everytime I paint I do something like that because it's easier getting started covering something rather than staring at a blank canvas.
story 2, the funeral story: it's just so strange if she cares so much not to miss the funeral, then you'd think she would then care enough to respect their wishes and just not go if she truly feels like she can't leave her baby with anyone else
I don’t think it was about that. I think it was the idea that she was automatically assumed not going and or that she wasn’t included. And given her situation, feeling not heard and then having that happen after already feeling unheard then feeling betrayed. Her pushing to go I believe was to either make a point or push her husband to fight for her and make her a priority. I’m currently dealing with postpartum for the second time and while I’m in this head space I can see it clearly from her point of view. Most of my problems I had to work through with my husband was feeling pushed aside or unheard and then betrayed. I also went through a lot of health complications post birth, maybe that could be a cause. theres so many other factors.
@@alycharme9247 that's true, it's interesting to see how going through things like that can really skew our perceptions like that. and sorry to hear you're going through pp, while i can't fully relate because i don't plan on ever having kids, i can empathize with some of that as someone who's 99% sure i have bpd
It was really great listening to people discuss a kind of anxiety that they do not understand with such empathy. It’s important to not enable bad behavior. The woman with postpartum is in the wrong. But it’s always so important to try understanding where people are coming from. There are so many cases in life where people are not trying to be malicious. Life just gets weird sometimes.
Story 4 (Breastmilk) just has me thinking about the fact that I’ve been watching my niece’s for a while and I have never given them anything without having talked to their mom about it at the time or knowing we talked about it in the past. And I only have ever really given them stuff their mom has provided though recently with the cough they keep ping ponging I’m about to buy some cough medicine (which I have already talked to mom about) So regarding the story I like the comment about soft NTA cause I do think the mom is overreacting a little bit (the completely banned from visiting alone part) She has the right to be upset it happens and used this moment to communicate her wishes on how she expects her child to be cared for when being watched. The pediatriciac nurse part does makes me lean more towards the YTA side of it. But I do understand some moms don’t want things done with their kids and people have to respect that.
I paid for EVERYTHING in a friendship I had for 10 years I paid for her tattoo, car payment, fuel, nails, concert tickets and more because she ‘couldn’t afford it’ she was the one with a full time job I didn’t but I’m incredibly easy to manipulate (I’m autistic and don’t have friends). I finally stopped taking to her when she got mad I didn’t want to get high when I was tube feeding my cat. I sometimes still want to be friends with her but then I remember how much money I spent on her and the fact she bought a house but never even paid for my drink
For the breast milk story, I am a mom to a one year old, I wouldn’t really be upset but I would ask for them to ask me before doing anything like that again. I’ve actually used my own breast milk in my own ears because I had a few ear infections postpartum (it didn’t help cause mine were pretty bad) and I wouldn’t put my breastmilk in anyone else’s kid’s ears or anything without asking their parents permission. Also, you might have to ask if you can put a bandaid on someone’s kid. I am allergic to adhesives on certain parts of my body with more delicate skin and blister up from the bandaid so the bandaid blister is usually even worse than the actual wound
I didnt know the air horn thing, was a thing. (had to google it) I just thought he (and Morgan has done it a few times) just liked blues clues.... I've heard other people do this before too. I was 1000% on board with this just being a normal millennial thing. lol thx for cluing me in before I learned the hard way....
For the breastmilk story. I would be upset if someone did that for my child, its not like she gave the kid actual medicine, she gave the kid her body fluids 🤢 Edit: after the bodily fluids comment, there are certain things that pass through breastmilk, and you dont know her full medical history.
@@Karla-iw7sx Right? ears mouth and eyes are all connected and if she has a unknown bacteria or illness that can pass through breastmilk, then the child could be made ill. She should have asked consent to do that to the child in the first place and I wouldnt trust someone around my child if they did things like that without asking.
omg as soon as I heard Justin's comments today, I was laughing so hard I almost did a spit take when he said "compensation" I totally agree with his comments
WOW the last story made me feel sick to my stomach. Absolutely disgusting. I dated someone that was extremely abusive and it is so fucking scary knowing there are so many more monsters out there. I wish I knew this girl so I could reach out to her and help her. it is beyond teriffying and heart breaking
still commenting while watching. story five - OH MY GOD! it's like she's 15 and considers her friends like her parents treating her and her boyfriend to meals and outings. does her presence add THAT much pazazz to the gathering that they will let her walk all over them just to have her there!?
For the last story I definitely have a crazy moment. Growing up my mom struggled with addiction so I got put in the system but at 2 years old my maternal grandmother adopted me. When I was 7 my mom got pregnant again. She was clean her whole pregnancy but as soon as my brother was born began using again. My brother was adopted by a different family and all we knew of them was that they had other adopted kids and the name they changed my brothers to. Years later, I’m now 24, me and some friends were at dinner and just recounting our lives. When I got to the part about my brother one of my friends stops me after I said his name and asked if I knew the adopted mother’s name I didn’t but I’m sure my grandma did and I asked why. A boy the same age with the same name with adopted siblings went to her church. My other friend stopped her and asked for the moms name again and said that, that family lives in her childhood home and her parents are there landlords. I am extremely close to this friend and her family. Turns out it was my brother and he was living in my best friends childhood room this whole time.
I'm glad Justin brought up the scenario of a family friend being a chiropractor and adjusting your child. This exact situation happened to me. My son was 3 months old and I just had gone back to work. My in-laws were taking care of my baby and their friend came over that was a chiropractor. When I came home they told me he gave my son an adjustment by hanging him upside down by his feet. I kept my cool but I was fucking pissed. I told my husband we couldn't leave the baby alone with them anymore.
As someone who has had postpartum depression and has lost a child. The lady is the A. I would be so heartbroken if that was me. I think that would have made me severed any relationship I had with my SIL.
This isn't much different from breast feeding another person's baby without asking. You just cannot do that. OP needs to set clear boundaries and say that I'm not OK with you giving my kid breast milk under any circumstance. You can watch my kid, but in the future the answer is no to breast milk and please call if you're unsure. It didn't have to blow up, but this crossed a line because you honestly don't know what another person puts in their or what your kid could catch. Whether it works as a treatment doesn't matter.
I’m a little shocked on your take this time Morgan! It’s completely unacceptable for someone else to do something medical or naturopathic without parental consent. Yes this is harmless and she was doing a good thing for her niece but she shot herself in the foot by not calling her parent running it by her and providing her reliable sources to read before making a decision. I see where the trust is broken and not letting her babysit again. Everyone kinda sucks in this one.
Response to breast milk story as a babysitter- Parents get really personal about their kids health. The rule I always followed was no treatment without talking to a parent, unless it’s an emergency. So, if a kid says they have a headache, I wouldn’t give medications until I talked to the parent. But if the kid scrapes his knee, then I’d lightly wash it and put a bandaid on. No Neosporin. I’d wait until the parents got home. The only time I’d go against that is if the kid says that they usually put on neosporin. Then I’ll let the parent know when they get home.
1:33:52 it makes me sad how much this OP reminds me of my mom and dad. My dad is definitely a narcissist but has lots of “good qualities” that people looking from the outside would think he’s a great person. Now my mom has constant anxiety and I don’t think I’ve ever seen her let her hair down and just be herself. It’s like she always has this need to appear like the perfect wife for him. For example growing up we had to make sure the tv was off by the time my dad got home from work and appear to be doing something more productive, even if we had been watching something educational like Jeopardy, because otherwise he’d get upset with her for watching tv when there’s other “better” things he thought she should be doing. They seem to be doing better now that all the kids are out of the house (he had very high scholastic expectations of us kids, hence no tv because “we should be studying”) so I think she’s able to relax more. But their communication still sucks. If she’s upset about something he did and actually voices it, his apologies are typically “I’m sorry that you’re upset/ that you feel that way” Anyways this went on for way too long though I definitely have more I could add 😅 My point was, I really hope this OP doesn’t end up in a similar situation. That man also should not be raising any kids until he solves that personality disorder
As a parent, if you haven't been told by me that my daughter has had it before call before giving her anything. If you know I have given her a medicine just give me a heads up you had to give her some. My aunt watches my daughter while I work and she always texts me about what foods she plans to give her (she 10 months old) if she knows she hasn't had it before.
Morgan: “are you ready to be mad?”
Justin: ✨💕sure🧚☺️
Justin is so sweet he's just lovely
The breastmilk story infuriated me. I'm a pediatric PA, and there's not enough research to suggest that breastmilk clears ear infections. Also was the infection in the ear canal (otitis externa) or behind the tympanic membrane (otitis media) because if it was behind the TM, the breastmilk wouldn't even touch the infection. That aunt definitely should have asked. Also, breastmilk does go bad eventually and could absolutely cause an infection in the canal. 🤦🏾♀️
Yes! Thank you for this education. Urgent care PA here and this was my exact thought.
This! Thank you!
That is one of the strangest ways to treat an ear infection and I would be disgusted if I had a child and someone did that to them. It isn’t proven and the sister in-law shouldn’t be putting that in a child’s ears. It could of possibly made the infection worse.
By that time, they would’ve gotten antibiotics for the ear, and it would’ve most likely drained out by that point. Yes, not a lot of research has gone into it, but how much does it’s really affect the ear? And you’re right it’s behind the drum. It won’t do anything it will just drain out of the ear. Olive oil is literally prescribed to loosen up earwax. Kitchen olive oil. You don’t think that some contamination with that?
@kimberlyjanzen412 While I get what you're saying, olive oil is not a bodily fluid. Breast milk goes bad long before olive oil would. And I have personally never suggested a parent use olive oil to loosen up ear wax. There are drops for that.
Story 3: Didn't OP's boyfriend say he was going to hurt himself if she left him? Aren't we gonna talk about that? 😅Pretty sure that is the worst form of manipulation.
Agreed. It was such a small blurb but it deserves to be addressed.
Literally thank you! That made me very uncomfy. She needs to dump his ass now!
yes it a form of abuse
Yeah I’d be done with that guy. I also think he was a cheater during the relationship and he for caught. If it was a one night stand how does she have his contact info? He was playing his gf all along and got cocky and got caught.
Yes, that is so manipulating!! My ex used to do that during fights or when I couldn't talk with him. It is the worst feeling
Story 2, my brother died at 18. Not as young but still.. This was the most horrible day of my life. I was LIVID when I found out someone brought their baby when it started crying mid service. And I didn't even know the person. Funerals, especially tragic ones are no place for babies. 23:57
Wife’s reaction bothered me so much, someone lost a family member and she’s mad about leaving a baby for an hour with a trusted family member? I would have left her at home with the baby.
the redpill story is horrifying, it's scary to think that there are people like that in the world
It made me nauseous.
I think it's brain malformation or the result of an unrealized infant/early childhood TBI.
No like actually it’s so terrifying.
Reading that story made me realize a guy I was with did the exact same thing to me, I wonder if he knew about this redpill thing
Even more when you see how many man are now listening and agreeing to those podcast of men talking this type of BS and acting like that.
On breastmilk: the article that Morgan read as the first result was from Ameda which is a brand which sells breast pumps through insurance. I have found 0 peer reviewed or scientific studies to support those claims. They are anecdotal at best. (Also BS on the cancer stuff, or else we wouldnt see babies with leukemia)
Also just because someone is a nurse doesnt mean they arent a kook (think: nurses who dont believe in vaccines)
Thank you! Sometimes googling and accepting the first source isn't always the best practice. Morgan was mid-recording and doesn't have time to fact check in depth on-the-fly so I'm not really mad about it. But I was skeptical enough to scroll down to the comments to see what other people said about the breast milk haha
as soon as she said “i googled it” i knew she just looked at the first thing that popped up lmfao… there’s absolutely no way it targets cancer cells. it’s like they heard “antibodies” and said “well those fight toxins, therefore, it must-“ yikes
The last story is actually horrifying. Like the fact that there's a human being that thinks like that is crazy.
People with NPD do. Same with sociopaths and psychopaths
Preach sis
My ex did this! I didn’t realize that what he did to me was an actual method! It literally sounds like him, how everything was written, it sounds exactly like him
omg girl what if it is him@@kenzi-2160
Breast milk and bandaids are VERY different Morgan. Breast milk can transmit diseases and I think that parents should be included in treatment plans BEFORE they happen.
the fact she used that comparison AS A NURSE… so so different
Re: the breast milk ear infection
I’m a postpartum nurse, teach a women’s health college course, and am a breastfeeding mom. I would be LIVID if a family member or friend put their breast milk in my kid’s ear. Like OP said it’s a body fluid, you don’t know what diseases the sister in law has (HIV, Hep C, etc.). Even for giving babies donor breast milk in the hospital parents must sign a consent for the risk of developing a disease from someone’s body fluids. Also, and this is because I am a nursing professor, the first page of google that says “3-4 drops in the ear is fine” is not a peer reviewed source for evidence based practice. What is beneficial regarding breastfeeding and ear infections, is for the infant who is breastfeeding themselves. The saliva in the baby’s mouth helps trigger the mom’s body to develop antibodies that will then be delivered to the baby orally from the breast milk. That’s not to say topical or otic application isn’t advised, breast milk baths have helped with my child’s diaper rash/eczema. There are a number of studies currently happening that are investigating these very things and we just need more data to definitely say this is a cure. However, again, breast milk is a body fluid and OP is NTA.
All of this!!! I was wondering what the source was and whether it was peer reviewed. I'm a pediatric PA and would never tell a parent to use breastmilk for an ear infection. Especially for a kid that isn't theirs.
Re: Breastmilk - That sounds so completely unhinged to me. Do NOT ever put your bodily fluids full of your germs into my child, much less without explicit consent! Do not ever give my child non emergency medical treatments without my explicit permission. Just dont.
Breastmilk story: I am also a nurse and would be horrified if another woman put her breast milk in my child’s ear, family or not. HIV can be transmitted through breast milk which could be theoretically absorbed into the blood vessels in the ear. Very small chance but still a chance. OP would not know sister in-law’s health status and most people with HIV do not know they have it until it’s progressed. I would not want any treatments completed by babysitters without my consent or prior review of an allergy list. I’ve had patients allergic to adhesive from bandaids/tape and topical creams. She’s still an asshole for not allowing unsupervised contact, like you said an in-depth conversation of boundaries and a second chance is warranted.
This!!!!!! And you never know what someone is carrying 100%
Yea, I was gonna say I don’t care if the SIL was a certified nurse, this child was not hers! She can make all the decisions for her own children, but has to ask for permission for another child!!
Up
Not to mention most ear infections in this age group are otitis media and occur behind the ear drum, the BM wouldn’t even reach it, it’s actually not backed by science at all.
Also as a health care professional who works in paediatrics, don’t put substances high in sugar near a potential bacterial infection, that’s a terrible idea.
Yes! That’s insane!
As someone who struggled with postpartum depression and anxiety... I appreciate Justin understanding and putting himself in her position while defending his. That's what it's about! 👏🏼
why is no one talking about the LAST STORY??? that was the craziest thing i’ve ever had to process like what is WRONG with him. he sees no value in himself and resorts to mind games and bs. that is belligerent
we haven't reached the last story yet 😄 Paused to comment inbetween
Hearing that story made me lose my mind. What the hell is wrong with people?!
My ex tried to make a rule that we couldn’t talk about our relationship with other people because it was “our business” … realizing it was because he didn’t want people telling me things he did/said were not okay…
My ex did that too!
2 HOURS?! YES!! I’ve been rewatching old episodes and this makes me so happy!! It’s really gotten me through college! Congrats on the engagement btw!
May you two both have a lasting and blessed union!
"This will be his second broken-off engagement"
"Wonder why"
EXACTLY, JUSTIN!
The "we broke up 2 weeks and he had a baby" story: the threats to his own health if you leave is a huge, huuuuuuuuuuge red flag. Cash your loss in and get out, he's gonna hurt you (make sure he has people around when you leave him though, just in case. Speaking from experience here)
He is suuuuch a red flag!! He was totally willing to just let that woman with the baby be and pretend it wasn't real? He's sooo iiick
Straight up, threatening that to keep someone from leaving you is an act of abuse. Also sadly speaking from experience. I hope OP safely gets out of the situation soon.
Also: him not using a condom with the girl and then getting back together with his gf within 2 weeks means he was possibly exposing her to STDs without her knowledge (some tests, like HIV, can't even be accurately performed that soon after exposure). There are so many bad signs in this story.
I've been looking for comments about this story!! Like everything went out the window on potentially mending everything the SECOND! She said he was making threats about himself. ABSOLUTELY NOT!! RED FLAGS ALL THE WAY
Something else I picked up on was how she says she's given up so much for him. She's missed out on friends, family, things she's wanted to do etc. It very eerily reminds me of a relationship I had where I was sort of slowly secluded to only being around that person and making sacrifices for them and was easier to manipulate because of that. That plus him threatening her if she leaves are huge red flags that stood out immediately to me
Story 2…holy shiz. Does that wife have no empathy? Also, her reaction when he and his mother got home from the funeral, would be it for me. You never forget how someone treats you during a time like that
Morgan, I think the problem with the breast milk in the ear story is that the woman did this without OP's permission. If she suggested it to OP as a potential treatment, that would be one thing. But not waiting for permission and just acting without thinking what the parents would want is no way for a babysitter to act. Imagine if it were essential oils or something harmful that SIL thought could "help" the baby. Whether it's helpful or not, you don't give babies non-essential medical treatment without parents' permission.
No, listen to the rest of the story before you type something out. OP's problem was "eww icky gross" which is weird and sexist. SIL is a literal pediatrician, she prescribes this to her patients, it is a real thing that does work often better than medication. She did what all mothers do, and OP acted as though she hurt her child. She put her own bias before her child's wellbeing. If the problem was the fact she didn't ask, then that's a "Hey in the future can you tell me first" conversation, not a "omg u disgusting monster you're not allowed near my child" reaction. She even said she'd be okay with her giving her Tylenol, something that a child can OD on and has side effects, but not BREASTMILK? Yall are just dumb. Breastmilk works, it's not some "holistic" remedy, Doctors recommend it, it's completely uncomparable to essential oils, read a book.
As a nurse, she should know there should be consent for treatment. Or that the doctor makes the decision for meds and treatments and the nurse administers the medicine after the doctor prescribes and the parent consents
@@Shortypants403 she is not a nurse, she is a literal doctor. And sure, she should have, but this was a HUUUGE over reaction and you're enabling it by trying to place blame on the SIL.
@@buddingbonesBreastmilk is amazing for helping fight ear infections - all of those antibodies. Also, it takes all of two minutes to pick up the phone and give mom a heads up. Had she done so, she would have realized this wasn't something OP was comfortable with. Taking unnecessary shots at people while making your point isn't exactly the hallmark of intelligence, hope your day gets better.
@@diamcole Thanks for reiterating what I already said. I'll absolutely take shots at people who side with an asshole. To coddle OP and claim their actions - to withhold family from someone over a conversation that didn't need an escalation above "Hey give me a heads up in the future" - are just based on a mundane formality is insanely idiotic, and me calling it out does nothing to diminish the point of my argument, so get off your high horse. What OP did is borderline abusive towards SIL; to hold her own daughter hostage from family members over a petty formality is shitty, and like it or not, it does say something wrong about your character to act like she was justified in that.
The breastmilk story-- The line for me is when she argued with OP. She gave the baby a treatment without checking, which at first was an innocent slip up. OP then communicated that she didn't appreciate that and she argued that "it wasn't a big deal" and continued to double down. As a nurse, I'd like to see what happens if she minimized the wishes of a parent she's working with like that. This probably wouldn't have escalated if she'd just accepted the feedback and promised not to do it again. She wasn't banned from babysitting because she did it, she was banned because she argued the point and OP has no reason to think her wishes will be respected going forward.
For the breast milk story
I exclusively breastfeed my daughter and I use the milk for her skin and occasionally put it on myself as well. BUT I would not give it or put it on anyone else's kids without asking or the parent asking me. I personally wouldn't want anyone giving my daughter their breastmilk without asking first. I think that's the issue for me is just having the conversation and asking.
Seems also like it's only something that'd work if it's your milk for your baby.
That's my biggest issue. There are SO many other reasons I could give for why this probably isn't safe, but at the end of the day, SIL did a medical thing without ASKING FOR CONSENT. And judging by the WAY she presented it, SIL probably knew OP doesn't really believe in homeopathy so she's just doing it to "prove her wrong". Spite-dosing your niece with something her mom wouldn't consent to is wild.
That last story is horrifying. I’ve wondered if people know they are being abusive and he writes it down and post to the internet. That’s a scary thought.
That's called a sociopath
Great episode! Breast milk/Ear infection - Morgan I am really surprised at the stance you took. While breast milk is the closest thing to liquid gold, I don't think applying it to a child, even topically, that is not yours and unbeknownst to their parent is a good move. Breast milk can also transmit disease. Several viruses, including HIV, can be transmitted via breast milk. I would be pissed because it demonstrates a lack of good judgment to do that without permission.
RIGHT! i also can’t believe she said the ears don’t lead anywhere! this is someone who worked in the medical field
I came here from Spotify just to comment this! I was so surprised by her take as well. I would 100% put my own breast milk in my kids ears (and have before) but would be absolutely livid if someone else did it with their breast milk. There is a reason why donated breast milk goes through rigorous testing before it can be transferred.
Honestly. And the bottom line was that the person didn't ask OP if she could do it, not even a heads up, and just went ahead and do it to a child.
Thank you!!!! Terrible take. Probably made the ear infection worse.
yes, I was totally shocked at her thoughts on this. I couldn't imagine how upset id be about this if a family member did this to my future children.
Morgan: "i really hate guys who wear hats all the time"
justin with his hat: 👁👄👁
Mayhaps i am missing a joke but that was why she specifically pulled that as an example. She was trying to show him an equivalent of negging that would in theory apply to him
Story 1 - NTA. Yeah maybe it was childish but don’t make work harder for people doing you a favor, that’s honestly worse in my opinion. The wife was super dismissive of OP asking her to keep the dogs out, and I’d probably have just walked off the job and told her to find someone else willing to put up with her purposefully letting the dogs in and making a mess. I hate people who don’t give a damn about the time of people doing them a favor and add to it by doing stupid shenanigans like that. She can be a big girl and paint her own walls while her dogs run free in the room.
My first thought was “Are they paying this guy? It sounds like he’s doing thousands of dollars worth of work for a favour.”
It’s esh for me, op sounds not great, but wife also sucks
I'm always baffled by people that stand up for people like the wife in the story. She was inappropriate in her actions and should have apologized. If I were op, I would sit down with her and explain why I was offended. I would demand an apology. I guess some people are stupid entitled and feel like they deserve things to be done for free
If he actually wrote “Fxck”, not the AH but if it’s “F you” “Bxtch” or “cxnt” then I’m on the wife’s side. But regardless, if it’s that big of a deal and warrants an apology in their eyes, they should not be trying to get him to come back in their home.
i think ESH. i think it’s disrespectful to write profanity on someone else’s walls but he definitely has the right to not help them FOR FREE anymore lol. and they shouldn’t blame him if he isn’t welcome back.
The red pill story is really scary because it’s giving dark romance novel to a certain extent. It’s crazy that people are playing that out in real life. It literally sounds like forcing Stockholm syndrome. 😢
i agree. I love dark romance books and morally grey characters, however- real life? ABSOLUTELY not.. thats psychotic.. i really hope that poor girl gets out.
NPD, sociopath and psychopath behavior
@@Eph10c had the same thought
@@Eph10c my immediate thoughts too
horrible :(
I don't think even dark romance male main characters are that horrifically misogynistic and evil. truly belongs to hell.
One of the FUNNIEST parts of the story about the moocher and her boyfriend was down in the comments of that post. It turns out that the moocher's boyfriend wasn't just taking the ribs - HE WAS TAKING THE HOST'S CONTAINER TOO! Talk about entitled 😂
you’re joking. that’s INSANE☠️
im literally baffled wtf :')
I can't believe we didn't get that insight haha wow!
For the breastmilk story… I knew breastmilk helped and that’s super nice to try and do that. However, as a Mother… I just personally feel its gross to put your breastmilk into another person’s kid. Like… no they’re not eating it, but it is absorbed and now that child has her antibodies in them forever PLUS anything else the sister took. What if the Mom doesn’t want that? It’s her right to say what treatment her child receives. Even if the SIL is a nurse, that doesn’t give her the right to decide for another Mom. I feel like there is very little harm to put a band aid on a kid. BUT what if the child you’re watching has an adhesive allergy? ALWAYS ALWAYS ASK. Now in an allergy situation Mom or Dad should tell sitter of the issue. But if it’s not stated don’t just do it if it’s not immediately necessary. And please don’t put something into a child that contains remnants of your DNA without asking the parent first. You NEVER know. This is a huge violation of trust. I don’t know if it’s relationship ENDING. But I can definitely see the Mom’s line of thought. I might say start there and give her a chance to earn it back. She had good intentions. But we all know what the path to H*II is paved with.
For the breastmilk story, if it can be remedied with your basic first aid kit, it's fine to do so without permission. If not, ask the parents first. Simple.
My neighbor's cat scratched me when I was a kid and the mom called my mom to ask about using neosporin. Boundaries were crossed here, the sister isn't a medical professional, so a phone call was warranted.
And then we get the info that sil is actually a peds nurse...
Came here to say this! Basic, age appropriate, first-aid is OK! ANYTHING ELSE, ask. I do still think OP is overreacting, though. SIL clearly meant well and was super honest about it.
@@kellyjoboland5594 even a nurse cannot administer aid without permission
It really depends. Scratched knee? Band-aid and let the parents know. Medicine? NEVER. let's say it's a headache, would you know if they are allergic to anything? if not then don't even try. Hell, I remember a case in which a doctor passed out and was only getting worse in the ER, then when they finally contacted the doctor partner, they learned they were allergic to latex, to which point she was A BUNCH AROUND THEM, the reason she passed out was because the hospital trying to spend less money bought latex gloves instead of rubber ones and didn't notify anyone, she put on the gloves and passed out few minutes later without knowing what was wrong. The hospital got sued and lost and the doctor really got too close because of greedy and proud fellas refusing to call the family, if they did rght away, the partner would have told them the allergy, heck they didn't even bother looking on her information for it.
Story 3: The partner made threats against himself if OP leaves? BREAK UP! That's scarily emotionally manipulative! NEVER okay!
The one about the abusive bf purposfully traumatizing his gf was so scary. Like horrifying.
He's a legit sociopath
Justin: I'm addicted to you without that though.
The entire THT fanbase: Awwww
We love you two together! ❤
Breastmilk story--Even daycares are not allowed to give kids anything (ie neosporin, sunscreen, lip balm, and diaper cream) without permission. Thats why parents have to fill out a lot of forms.
I have 2 kids and personally, I would never want someone else's breastmilk in my child's ear. 🤮
Why is that? Cuz breastmilk is inherently gross and sexual because it came from a breast?
@@Imjustkendall Because it's high in sugar (worsens bacterial infections) and carries viruses SIL may have (think HepC). Not every health/sanitation concern is born from sexism child.
@@Imjustkendall my opinion is because it’s an entirely different persons immune system in MY CHILD, I would definitely want someone to ask. Not because it’s “sexual” … because it’s fluid that comes out of a persons body your child isn’t familiar with. Just my take. It would be best to ask. Maybe her own breast milk could have been appropriate, if that’s the way she wanted to go.
Yes good intentions, just an iffy outcome. In my opinion.
@batmanoncrackKKKKKK you do realize STIs and stuff transfer in milk. Imagine if she had herpes or hepatitis. You need to put the phone down and get out of your weird bubble and relax.
@@Imjustkendall I am a mother. I breastfed my child until after he was 2 years old. In public too. I don't have an issue with breastmilk jewelry for example. But even in a Google search you can find out breastmilk does nothing for the most common ear infections (which are for the middle ear), it might work on external ear infections. However, since it has sugar (lactose), it might also make it worse. And also might carry some other infections. Finally, a mother's milk changes according to the baby's needs. So a mother's milk MIGHT work for an external infection of her own breastfed baby. Oh, and the fact that she is/was a nurse means nothing, in my opinion. There are so many DOCTORS in my country that prescribe antibiotics without blood tests or anything...
Story 6 guy definitely reminds me of the other man who would constantly tell his SO everyday that she stinks, to the point that she took multiple showers a day and constantly applied deodorant and had other people telling her she smelled good, but she still stayed until Reddit made her realize something was seriously wrong with their relationship. Turns out it was some psycho tactic the guy learned from his dad who apparently told him that if you criticize/ tell her all the time she sticks, then she’ll never leave you because her self esteem is so low basically. It’s psychotic
I think the breast milk thing was just weird. I understand that it can work but either way she should’ve explained it to the mom first before doing it. OP was probably shocked at the idea of it, rightfully so, and it’s hard to snap out of that and listen to an explanation when you had your parental voice taken away from you in that moment
This and I thought breadt milk anti bodies was specific for your baby I could be very wrong so font quote me but I heard your body knows when your baby is sick and your breast milk changes dependant on that not someone else's child plus I'd be grossed out if a grown woman medical professional or not used their breast milk for my child in ear mouth or a bath it would be strange especially since your ment to be an aunt not another mother figure
Not rightfully so. You're all freaking out because in your heads breasts = sex thing
@@issecret1 no, not because of sex thing, but because breast milk can transmit diseases (just like other bodily fluids)
@issecret1 that's not at all why people are mad about it. It's someone else's bodily fluids snd the fact it was done without permission.
@@issecret1Don’t project
Morgan riding out for breast milk as treatment for somebody else’s baby has me cracking UP 😂 that’s the hottest take thus far imo
To the child loss story, this is literally something I lived. My child passed at 8 months and we had a funeral for her. That entire time I was on autopilot except for when you snap out of it to break down and cry. Those parents aren’t breathing, eating or doing anything that isn’t already drenched in grief and for a FAMILY MEMBER to be selfish and make that time harder… no she isn’t worth their time.
Yeah you’d think with her PPA she would understand. I couldn’t even imagine wanting my baby at a funeral. Not the place and not the time. Once you have a child you have to learn you don’t get to do what you want you have to put baby first and in this case it means staying home. I’m sorry for your loss! ❤
Sorry for your loss.
I lost a child, too, and I completely agree with you. She is being irrational and not considering anyone else's feelings.
I’m sorry mama ❤️🩹❤️🩹
Story 6 was so scary and it genuinely feels like what happened to me, though I don’t know if they did it so intentionally. My ex removed his mask one month into our marriage but I felt trapped. I got lucky actually that he left me a year later, Jesus Christ how awful.
Breast milk story: don’t put fluid in your child’s ear unless it’s something prescribed/recommended by the pediatrician. Maybe as a topical treatment with the parents’ permission.
Exactly, google is not a place to get medical advise and the sil is not the child's doctor.
Exactly what I said as well.
Normally I would completely agree, however we find out in the story the sister in law IS a pediatrician! I believe that changes things
@Kennedyvernengo They say she's a pediatric nurse I believe which does lend her some credibility sure but the point is she's not that child's nurse/doctor and she did not consult the child's parent before administering a treatment the parent did not agree to. I'd be fully on board if she'd consulted with her niece's parents first, but just squirting some milk in the kid's ear without asking is kinda weird. And definitely crosses some boundaries. The op definitely went a little overboard on the reaction and maybe there's context we're missing but relatives and doctors shouldn't give children meds or home remedies without permission.
@@Kennedyvernengo Not really. Just because you're a doctor does not mean you're allowed to treat patients without consent. A conversation was definitely needed beforehand. The mom could do research herself to see if she'd feel comfortable with it or not. I would never take it upon myself to treat someone's child even if I was educated unless maybe it was an EMERGENCY
Imagine hearing “I’m addicted to you (without emotional abuse)” from your man ❤️
Props to OP on the 2nd story, I’m glad he was able to keep his composure while being empathetic, it’s completely understandable that she’s struggling with the PPA, but at the end of the day, that event is an event of grief & it does not center around her. That’s the end all.
27:34 The comment “seeing a baby didn’t add to our grief”. YOUR grief. Yours. This is about someone else’s grief who has kindly asked OP to not bring baby along to their own baby’s funeral. My take is that people grieve differently and this is not a wild request. It was done with respect and understanding between OP and his sibling during what will likely be the worst time of the sibling’s life. But I’m not all the way through this story, so I’m going to keep listening. Hoping for a healing outcome ❤️🩹
Story #1- Them getting mad about what he wrote in Primer is the equivalent of your mom reading g your diary and getting mad about what you wrote (IMO).
this is probably my favourite episode of justins! its refreshing to see two people mesh so well and he is so emotionally intelligent and empathetic. happy for you morgan. love you guys
Time stamps!!
Story 1 - 3:21
Sorry 2- 17:07
Story 3 - 31:47
Story 4 - 52:11
Story 5 - 1:06:45
Story 6 - 1:24:37
Story 7 - 1:40:11
Thank you
I think you missed the one about the baby and the funeral! That one is at 17:07
Thank you!!!! I rely on timestamps 😩
Thank u ❤
🙏🙏🙏🙏🫡🫡🫡
I genuinely got chills at 42:58 with Morgan saying the right person will be there. Literally awoken something so deep and I really needed to hear that. Love you Morgan❤️
This last story is triggering for sure.....sounds like the confessions of my abuser. It is terrifying to live it. I am so thankful that he found someone to cheat on me with and finally left. I am so so grateful for her. I pray she doesn't suffer how I did but I thank God for that woman. If it wasn't for her, idk if I would have made it out and then found my current fiance. I pray this girl found a way out too
That is so similar to my story. I NEVER would have left my abusive relationship if they didn’t cheat on me. I’d like to say I would have been strong enough to leave but I just know I wouldn’t have. This was years ago but I always say I am so grateful for that cheating.
@@amandaleighplans I was the same and I tried many times but he always guilted me back and locked me in for a while. Him making the decision was the only way out. It is great that you were able to get out too! I am so sorry you had to go through that! I wish I could understand HOW it happens HOW they can be one thing and then one day just different but hearing that story about the game.....just made me think...Nah idk if I really want to know anymore than what I just did.
I wish this didn’t trigger me the way it did. But it’s inspired me to share my own story..
This guy's for sure has NPD, sociopath or psychopath
Glad you found the courage. It takes alot. I know from experience. It took me getting a molar pregnancy and him totally dismissing me and my needs to wake up. I'm so glad that wasn't a actual pregnancy because I would've had his kid. Think he was upset the baby didn't stick. Because I'm pretty sure he wanted to trap me in the relationship
Last story is scary, this sounds just like the relationship my best friend is in :( she's so lost in the middle of it though she can't see. I've been trying so hard to show her how wrong it is :(
I was in a very similar relationship, it was so hard for my friends and family because I was so blind to how toxic everything was, it’s so hard to see anything but the storm you’re in and eventually it just becomes normal, I hope she realizes it’s not normal or okay:( all you can do is be there for her when she decides to break free, she will definitely need support when that happens and the best thing is to have her write down the reasons she decided to leave/the things that were bad in the relationship, because he will try to convince her to come back and she has to remember the reasons she left, I’m sorry you and her are going through this :(
Episode starts with Morgan’s adhd and squirrel brain
Me-“oh this about to be a good one.”
hahahahhahahahaha so funny
So true tho
Yes. Verbose intro and rewords her same thoughts. (Baby funeral) Move along.
Story 5 is actually so sad to me. So many people (including me) allow themselves to be taken advantage in this way and the fact that they have friends saying they were wrong for saying anything.. ugly behavior
I’m shocked at the dismissal and minimization surrounding the breast milk situation. A simple google search isn’t enough to say she’s over reacting. I’m completely deaf in one ear as the result of recurrent ear infections as a child. Shower water gave me infections. NEVER put anything in someone’s ear unless it is prescribed by a doctor or okayed by the parent. This is genuinely gross behavior because it crossed the mothers boundary. That breast milk didn’t do anything at that exact moment. It didn’t do anything for the pain, the sister in law decided she knew what was best to treat it and took away the child and moms consent. We shouldn’t teach child and people to ignore their boundaries because it “could help”. Give THEM the option of self determination to do it THEMSELVES. The daughter has continued issues with this, SIL couldve reached out at anytime and offered her the knowledge about breast milk for ear infections and empowered them to do the best for themselves rather than making that decision for them because they assumed it was helpful. NTA.
I completely agree. The minimization and confusion as to why the mother was upset is odd to me. They should ask a child’s parent before giving ANYTHING to that child. Doesn’t matter if it’s a proven home remedy or not, that is not their child and that’s ok. It’s not a tough situation to decipher as they are implying by their responses. This is a boundary and it deserves respect. I also believe it is completely different from something such as topical Neosporin or bandaids. Breast milk is a bodily fluid, it’s a wonderful one for sure, however, it is still something I would consider asking a parent permission on if i was planning to put in a child’s ear. Especially since it wouldn’t even be my own child. The sil may be a pediatric nurse BUT is not that child’s pediatrician or parent.
@@pkropkaI definitely think full no contact right out of the gate is a bit much. I personally wouldn’t go that far immediately.
But OP said Tylenol would’ve been fine. So a medicine with artificial flavoring and dyes, that is doing NOTHING to fight infection, was cool with her. But a natural antibacterial treatment, from a person (with a pediatric medical background) that she obviously trusted enough to watch her child, is unacceptable? Idk that’s weird to me.
@@peaceme99 How many times were you prescribed antibiotics by doctors before you went deaf in one ear?
Except it is a real thing and yall are being whiney and this attitude stems from "ew women are gross". Breastmilk is literally liquid gold and can heal A LOT. They're the asshole because they acted as though the SIL physically harmed their child when even pediatricians will tell parents to put breastmilk in their infants ear. Her problem wasn't whether or not the milk would work, she thought, "eww icky gross gross" and not only disregarded the fact it helped her child stop suffering, but acted like SIL was a pervert and therefore couldn't be near her niece. The SIL is a LITERAL pediatrician, she prescribes it to her patients because that's the best solution apart from medication! Maybe listen to the whole story. OP is the asshole.
Story 4: Honestly, I would not be okay with someone putting breast milk in my child's ears without consulting me first. This is not a "normal" treatment and in general, before administering any type of medicine, I would hope they would call me first (as someone that has a lot of allergies to regular medicine, it just makes sense to ask before you give the medicine). And even if I was asked, I would probably say no - it is just weird and the only scenario in which I would give my child breast milk for ear infection is if we had no other medicine, the doctor's office is not open and this is the only option.
for the breastmilk story.. as a mom i honestly wouldn’t care cuz it would save me from going to the doctor cuz i know the benefits lol but i do let the sitter know that she can give medication such as tylenol/ teething meds but to make sure it’s the correct amount. idk i thought all parents talk about this beforehand but i can see why the milk was weird for them and upset them.
edit: also forgot to add but the mom might have felt upset because as a mom you feel like your the only one that can make your kid feel better & someone else doing that might strike a nerve.
Also with that story, the father (ops husband) was perfectly fine with it. So what if one parent says it’s fine? I don’t think she did ask her brother, but would the mom still blow up if her brother said it was fine? Just something I thought about. Also breastmilk is amazing. Recently my family got pink eye. I put breastmilk into my eyes. Gone within a day. Everyone else struggled for weeks, even after getting medication.
@@XXemmz101XX i feel like she would still blow it up if she hadn’t agreed because to her it’ll always be weird since to her it’s somebody’s bodily fluid & that’s weird to some people no matter the benefits breast milk has for these kind of things. but yes breast milk is amazing! sadly i ran through my stash. it’s weird cuz i would’ve been grateful that she did that for me cuz ear infections are tough on babies/kids and that’s a quick fix
@@SA23240 it's not just the weird part though. Breast Milk can transmit HIV, Hep B, Hep C. No way anyone is using it on my child without my prior consent.
depends on the person I would definitely not be okay with anyone using their breast milk on my kid. because I think all body fluids are absolutely disgusting. and I'd definitely take a long break from using her as a babysitter. if she's willing to do that to my kid what else are you doing to my kid?
she's treating SIL like a sex offender. It's fine to be grossed out but this should prompt a discussion not a restraining order
Also, if you feel like you need to hide something your partner did from your loved ones because it will make them "look bad" it is definitely a red flag...
The breastmilk one... it is so unhinged that anyone would think it's okay to give another persons baby a substance IN THEIR INFECTED EAR without consent of the parent!!! There was NO consent, therefore it should not have happened. This one is so basic and I'm shocked at the take on this today.
You're all westerners here and it shows
I’m also shocked, it could have been a miracle cure, the point is consent! If something happened what would you say to that mum ??? I would be terrified that you’ll make decisions about my child without my consent in future in other areas, not ok.
Exactly. I don’t have my own kids but I babysat and worked in centers for years. Unless it had been previously discussed, you NEVER give a kid any type of treatment (besides something like a bandaid) without asking parents first. I was also shocked by their take on this one.
Breastmilk can also pass diseases etc like any other bodily fluids. I do not think it is okay to put bodily fluids on or in any child without consent. That is disgusting and I would agree that possibly not allowing her to babysit is appropriate. Depends on how receptive she would be to the criticism.
This is such an overreaction omg. Your kids aren’t gonna be able to live in this world if this is the kind of helicopter parent you’re going to be
story 1- the wife is being ridiculous. OP is going out of the way to help his friend and the thanks he gets is some sass?? oh hell no. OP is helping with all the repairs for free, the wife is being extremely unreasonable…the word was painted over. that’s nicer than what i would’ve wanted to write. also the wife was almost going out of her way to make his job harder by not watching the dog while he is painting their house…for free.
also i’m very curious to know if he was paying for the supplies or if they were. it wouldn’t really change my opinion but it would make the wife look even worse if OP has bought all the supplies and had to buy even more because the dog got the primer all muddy.
@@katec188i also wondered the same, it’s already frustrating to have your work slowed down by the situation but if your money was also tied into it? I’d be livid. Paint isn’t cheap, especially if you’re getting the good stuff and how many coats/how big the room is.
Story 6 sounds like he had antisocial personality disorder.
los accidentes pasan, quizás ella está tan acostumbrada a estar sola en la casa que se le olvidó que había alguien pintando, no importa. La reacción si importa, no se disculpó, no se ofreció a lavar la ropa, si estuvo trabajando todo el día no almorzaron juntos?, no le ofreció algo para tomar? no se sintió mal por hacer su trabajo más difícil? claramente me veo a mi mesma o a mi mamá abriendo la puerta de los perros por error, es un descuido y puedo puede pasar, pero las acciones consecuentes no y mucho menos enojarme por ver una estupidez pintada en la pared, si es un amigo de mi pareja pensaría que esta descargando frustración más que dirigiéndola hacia mí. No pensaría en tratar a un trabajador así y menos a un amigo que me esta haciendo un favor
Does it bother you more if its topical vs ingested or does that not matter?
I’m going through something very similar to the last story…but the difference is my partner is an addict. It’s like dating multiple people. It’s terrifying and traumatizing but it’s so hard to leave. Especially because even people with an illness deserve love, even if they are harder to love sometimes
I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. I’m sending so much love your way. I hope that one day you’re able to find peace in your life. ❤️
@@hannafournier2321 thank you! We actually had a big explosion today where cops were called. When you choose who you date, you accept consequences and that’s the hard part. But peace is coming ♥️ I wish you the best
@@KaileySmith-x8i That's so scary, I hope you're okay. I completely understand as I was in a extremely toxic relationship for 7 years, I'm happy to say that I've been out of it for 2 and have never felt more at peace. I know there is hope for you too, you are so much more capable than you know! ❤
Breast Milk Story- Pediatricians are split on the use of breastmilk for ear infections some say it can help others say don't do it, it can cause more damage. She should have asked and breastmilk is only as good as the person producing it, if I don't know what you ingest into your body on a regular basis I don't want your breastmilk for my child
I've only ever listened to the podcast on Spotify but I RAN to RUclips to leave a comment about the breast milk. Applying stuff inside the ear is not just topical. It can be absorbed through the bloodstream through the round window membrane (I'm not a medical professional though, just a google search). Swapping bodily fluids with a baby is NOT COOL especially when it's not their baby and they don't have the parents consent. What if the aunt had a bloodborne pathogen that they didn't know about? This is on the same level as the mother in law trying to breastfeed, that's my take. It was a huge lack of consideration of the aunt and entirely inappropriate. What other things could the aunt overlook when watching the baby, even if this wasnt intentional harm? It was definitely not an overraction to limit contact. Your take was HOT though and that's why I'm here:) love always, thanks for the great content
A RUclipsr I watch said, she paints negative things with primer and paints over then- it seems very therapeutic tbh.
Paint story: Bruh the first thing I painted in primer on my walls was a dickbutt. The wife is being an entitled weirdo, and the fact that she's making a big deal out of this instead of being thankful this friend is doing all this work for FREE, and not falling all over herself in apologies for the dog situation is super gross.
Okay I never comment but the story about breastmilk, I would probably react the same tbh. As a mom myself, that's really freaking weird and it was especially weird of the SIL to not ask or anything before taking matters into her own hands. Like yeah she didn't think before doing what she did, but at the same time it's very violating I feel. Literal body fluids into a whole child that's not yours. We don't know what's in SIL and what could be transferred somehow lmao it's baffling how disrespectful and how far the overstepping went in that. Everybody is different I guess, but I would react the same. Don't do things to my kid without asking me or letting me know before you do anything. I'm getting full-body chills thinking about somebody putting breastmilk into my child's ear just because from how revolted I am on it lmao
Edit: I don't care if she's experienced or what her job title is. If it's not your kid, don't be an ass. Simple as that honestly.
story 4: one of those stories where I am confused by yalls reactions lol, but the rule of thumb is if immediate action is needed, take it- ie a cut? treat the cut and band-aid, thats a no brainer. If the kid breaks a bone, take them to a doctor and call guardian asap to let them know. However in a situation with an ear infection, it's been infected, it's being treated by a doctors prescription medicine that the parents have agreed to. No further action was needed from a caregiver other than maybe administering said medicine. putting your breastmilk into a child's infected ear that was already being taken care of and healing through traditional methods under guidance of a doctor is insanity and concerning behavior. This coming from a kid who had many ear infections and was raised by Indian grandparents who have their own non traditional medicine beliefs. Even they asked my parents and me before trying one of their methods on me, and they wouldnt ever try that if I was already receiving care. like this is the biggest WTF situation ever. idc if google says it works, it wasn't a necessary action in the way a bleeding wound is.
“Once you break a glass, it’s hard to drink out of that thing” is one of the wisest things you’ve ever said 😂
Omg when she said that I was like wow….rly makes u think 🤔
Here’s my Crazy Coincidence story, if anyone’s lookin:
In 8th grade I went on a school trip to New York and DC over spring break. Other schools do this too, as I discovered when we would go to the destinations and find other class groups from different states taking similar tours. Well, when we were in New York, one activity we were able to do was watch Wicked on Broadway. The theater was MASSIVE, and I’d never been in such a large auditorium. It was pretty dim in there as well before the show as we all found our seats.
As I’m sitting with my class, I hear my name get shouted, only it’s my nickname that only people I knew from before 7th grade could have known me by, as I stopped telling people about it once I had multiple teachers throughout the day in middle school. I look around and see my friend that had moved away from California 4 years prior to Colorado, and her family, at the same show, the same night, SOMEHOW in the same seating area, thousands of miles away from home as I was. Being with her family, she was not on any sort of school trip.
The fact that she found me in a sea of people in a dimly lit auditorium was insane, and I still can’t believe it happened. I honestly can’t imagine any sort of unbelievable coincidences happening to me ever again. What are the odds?
Story 1: if op was a woman, I wonder if the wife’s hostility is jealousy
Exactly what I thought when I first heard the story
I giggle everytime you say “big word for Elmo” lol
Story 5- Thank you for spreading awareness!!! The tactics used by these absolute psychopaths need to be able to be spotted so these shit lickers can be exposed and left alone and miserable. Trust your gut!! If you're questioning their sincerity and love they don't love you. It shouldn't even be a question. I left a relationship like this over 11 years ago and I am still healing from abuse although I have a great husband now who is so loving.
Last little pallet cleanser: My aunt sent my mom a picture of my dad when he was younger… my little brother is a SPITTING IMAGE of my dad when he was a kid. My brother saw the photo and thought it was his twin he never knew about. My mom would go out with us to the store and stuff and due to my dad’s profession random people would come up to my mom in the story and ask if he was my dads kid… mom of course was skeptical and never gave the truth but. Crazy how the world works in mysterious ways.
I GASPED when she said lipo on her legs. That man is going to HELLLLL
Straight to the ninth circle no contest
Story 4… if the wife gave her brother and SIL a facial moisturizer and after using it she told them “I mixed in my husbands sperm.. it’s said to be good for the skin!” I’m sure brother and SIL would understand why OP is upset REAL QUICK
If it's ever in question, Justin's response to the second story proves he's going to be a FANTASTIC Father and coparent! Score, Morgan!
In relation to story 3: when you said a lot of women tend to be the ones making the trip or doing the extra step for the man, it hit hard. I just got out of that situation and broke up with my long distance bf of 5 years. Im still sad but I realized he was manipulative and controlling, and he wanted me to move to him even though I needed to finish school, and I’d be paid significantly less. He wanted me totally vulnerable and by myself so he could have power over me, which is something Im trying not to let traumatize me lolol I find a lot of comfort in these episodes, especially when I hear almost my exact story. Thank you for being here for me two hot takes gang 🥺😭
he also told me he was “wasting the best years of his life” because i wouldn’t move to play house with him, when my life wasn’t ready to be up and moved yet
I think with Story 3 - kind of where you guys almost went with it… there’s a difference between “your kid fell down here, so i gave her neosporin and advil” and “i know your kid suffers from chronic ear infections so i gave her a new treatment you’ve never heard of”. like what if the kid already had drops in her ear from the doctor and the breast milk could’ve badly reacted with it? Idk if that is possible or whatever, but i think the line has to be drawn with giving a child that isn’t your own treatment for something that isn’t an *immediate* injury that happened on your watch. you know what i mean?
but, i do agree that family dynamics may be at play and maybe OP overreacted a bit… but i’m sure it was scary to hear that your child was being treated for something without your permission!
@@TheKmyrtle1you have to remember breast milk can carry many diseases and viruses and STIs not say the sil has any of that but you can't just put your breast milk into the ear which is connected to the brain nose and mouth of a child that isn't yours
Totally family ynamics.... my mother was like 'if they are not dying, dismembered, or brain injury, dont call me. Something sounds like they do not have a great relationship already.
The fact it was done without the moms permission is crazy. Especially putting your on fluids in another child's ear without asking. That totally grosses me out. I asked my husband, and he agrees.
Right and I feel like she thinks she know better than the mom because she’s a nurse so didn’t think it was necessary to ask which is crazy
Weird coincidence story so my friend’s husband had a brother that passed away at a young age. Now my friend and her husband have a daughter and my friend’s mom was shopping at a used book store and found a Franklin book. She bought it and when she opened it she saw it was written out to the husbands brother
If you're watching someone else's kid, the rule of care _I_ followed as a nanny, was that ANY MEDICAL TREATMENT THATS NOT AN EMERGENCY, If not previously discussed, ALWAYS RUN IT BY THE PARENTS FIRST.
Even simple, incredibly common treatments, _including neosporin,_ can also have incredibly common, unintended, side effects. Neosporin contains a small amount of broad spec antibiotics. One which Im personally mildly allergic to, and is an incredibly common allergy. Roughly 11% of people have some form of allergic reaction to it. Application to my skin leaves a gross blotchy rash, especially when the scrape or whatever it was, broke through the thinnest top layer of my skin. The worst reaction was after a scraped knee, so... it doesn't take much for a lot of us lol. But if I came home to my kids leg like that, and a babysitter hadn't even asked? I would be pretty irritated. With google at hand, I do think the mom in that breastmilk story majorly overreacted. An initial irritation, is understandable. But not sharing in the initial post that she's a pediatrician, tells me that she KNOWS she overreacted, and is intentionally hiding major details for ego validation. Hopefully the constructive comments were able to show her she needs to chill.
Story 1 Literally everytime I paint I do something like that because it's easier getting started covering something rather than staring at a blank canvas.
story 2, the funeral story: it's just so strange if she cares so much not to miss the funeral, then you'd think she would then care enough to respect their wishes and just not go if she truly feels like she can't leave her baby with anyone else
I don’t think it was about that. I think it was the idea that she was automatically assumed not going and or that she wasn’t included. And given her situation, feeling not heard and then having that happen after already feeling unheard then feeling betrayed. Her pushing to go I believe was to either make a point or push her husband to fight for her and make her a priority. I’m currently dealing with postpartum for the second time and while I’m in this head space I can see it clearly from her point of view. Most of my problems I had to work through with my husband was feeling pushed aside or unheard and then betrayed. I also went through a lot of health complications post birth, maybe that could be a cause. theres so many other factors.
@@alycharme9247 that's true, it's interesting to see how going through things like that can really skew our perceptions like that. and sorry to hear you're going through pp, while i can't fully relate because i don't plan on ever having kids, i can empathize with some of that as someone who's 99% sure i have bpd
It was really great listening to people discuss a kind of anxiety that they do not understand with such empathy. It’s important to not enable bad behavior. The woman with postpartum is in the wrong. But it’s always so important to try understanding where people are coming from. There are so many cases in life where people are not trying to be malicious. Life just gets weird sometimes.
STO #2: Husband is NTA, the wife is. The funeral is not about her or her feelings
Story 4 (Breastmilk) just has me thinking about the fact that I’ve been watching my niece’s for a while and I have never given them anything without having talked to their mom about it at the time or knowing we talked about it in the past. And I only have ever really given them stuff their mom has provided though recently with the cough they keep ping ponging I’m about to buy some cough medicine (which I have already talked to mom about)
So regarding the story I like the comment about soft NTA cause I do think the mom is overreacting a little bit (the completely banned from visiting alone part)
She has the right to be upset it happens and used this moment to communicate her wishes on how she expects her child to be cared for when being watched. The pediatriciac nurse part does makes me lean more towards the YTA side of it. But I do understand some moms don’t want things done with their kids and people have to respect that.
Wow, a 2 hour show! Thanks y’all 😍
I paid for EVERYTHING in a friendship I had for 10 years I paid for her tattoo, car payment, fuel, nails, concert tickets and more because she ‘couldn’t afford it’ she was the one with a full time job I didn’t but I’m incredibly easy to manipulate (I’m autistic and don’t have friends). I finally stopped taking to her when she got mad I didn’t want to get high when I was tube feeding my cat. I sometimes still want to be friends with her but then I remember how much money I spent on her and the fact she bought a house but never even paid for my drink
For the breast milk story, I am a mom to a one year old, I wouldn’t really be upset but I would ask for them to ask me before doing anything like that again. I’ve actually used my own breast milk in my own ears because I had a few ear infections postpartum (it didn’t help cause mine were pretty bad) and I wouldn’t put my breastmilk in anyone else’s kid’s ears or anything without asking their parents permission. Also, you might have to ask if you can put a bandaid on someone’s kid. I am allergic to adhesives on certain parts of my body with more delicate skin and blister up from the bandaid so the bandaid blister is usually even worse than the actual wound
Story 3: girl run!! You're only 25. I'm starting over at 25 too. It's okay😭
I know Justin was going for the rave air horn but it was giving Blues Clues 😂 we love it though!
I didnt know the air horn thing, was a thing. (had to google it) I just thought he (and Morgan has done it a few times) just liked blues clues.... I've heard other people do this before too. I was 1000% on board with this just being a normal millennial thing. lol thx for cluing me in before I learned the hard way....
@@sabyna2 lol yes! I’m guilty of doing this often too!
Omg. Story 6...literally feels like you were describing my last relationship...I'm glad I got out of that with some dignity...:/
For the breastmilk story. I would be upset if someone did that for my child, its not like she gave the kid actual medicine, she gave the kid her body fluids 🤢
Edit: after the bodily fluids comment, there are certain things that pass through breastmilk, and you dont know her full medical history.
Yeah, and ears are not “just” ears. Ear infections can have life long complications. You dont mess with ears.
@@Karla-iw7sx Right? ears mouth and eyes are all connected and if she has a unknown bacteria or illness that can pass through breastmilk, then the child could be made ill. She should have asked consent to do that to the child in the first place and I wouldnt trust someone around my child if they did things like that without asking.
I also sont think she's as upset about the breastmilk part as much as the aunt deciding to take matters into her own hands without asking the parent
But her SIL in law would! And the woman is a pediatric fucking nurse, people! She would know too
omg as soon as I heard Justin's comments today, I was laughing so hard I almost did a spit take when he said "compensation" I totally agree with his comments
WOW the last story made me feel sick to my stomach. Absolutely disgusting. I dated someone that was extremely abusive and it is so fucking scary knowing there are so many more monsters out there. I wish I knew this girl so I could reach out to her and help her. it is beyond teriffying and heart breaking
still commenting while watching. story five - OH MY GOD! it's like she's 15 and considers her friends like her parents treating her and her boyfriend to meals and outings. does her presence add THAT much pazazz to the gathering that they will let her walk all over them just to have her there!?
For the last story I definitely have a crazy moment. Growing up my mom struggled with addiction so I got put in the system but at 2 years old my maternal grandmother adopted me. When I was 7 my mom got pregnant again. She was clean her whole pregnancy but as soon as my brother was born began using again. My brother was adopted by a different family and all we knew of them was that they had other adopted kids and the name they changed my brothers to. Years later, I’m now 24, me and some friends were at dinner and just recounting our lives. When I got to the part about my brother one of my friends stops me after I said his name and asked if I knew the adopted mother’s name I didn’t but I’m sure my grandma did and I asked why. A boy the same age with the same name with adopted siblings went to her church. My other friend stopped her and asked for the moms name again and said that, that family lives in her childhood home and her parents are there landlords. I am extremely close to this friend and her family. Turns out it was my brother and he was living in my best friends childhood room this whole time.
I'm glad Justin brought up the scenario of a family friend being a chiropractor and adjusting your child. This exact situation happened to me. My son was 3 months old and I just had gone back to work. My in-laws were taking care of my baby and their friend came over that was a chiropractor. When I came home they told me he gave my son an adjustment by hanging him upside down by his feet. I kept my cool but I was fucking pissed. I told my husband we couldn't leave the baby alone with them anymore.
As someone who has had postpartum depression and has lost a child. The lady is the A. I would be so heartbroken if that was me. I think that would have made me severed any relationship I had with my SIL.
I am so sorry this happened to you and your child ❤
Thank you. I commented because I sympathize with them both.
This isn't much different from breast feeding another person's baby without asking. You just cannot do that. OP needs to set clear boundaries and say that I'm not OK with you giving my kid breast milk under any circumstance. You can watch my kid, but in the future the answer is no to breast milk and please call if you're unsure. It didn't have to blow up, but this crossed a line because you honestly don't know what another person puts in their or what your kid could catch. Whether it works as a treatment doesn't matter.
2 hour show? Dropped 10 mins ago?? ON my birthday??? Love love loveeee🫶🏼
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! 🎉🥰
Happy Birthday 🥳
happy birthday!!🤭
Happy birthday!!
I’m a little shocked on your take this time Morgan! It’s completely unacceptable for someone else to do something medical or naturopathic without parental consent. Yes this is harmless and she was doing a good thing for her niece but she shot herself in the foot by not calling her parent running it by her and providing her reliable sources to read before making a decision.
I see where the trust is broken and not letting her babysit again. Everyone kinda sucks in this one.
Response to breast milk story as a babysitter- Parents get really personal about their kids health. The rule I always followed was no treatment without talking to a parent, unless it’s an emergency. So, if a kid says they have a headache, I wouldn’t give medications until I talked to the parent. But if the kid scrapes his knee, then I’d lightly wash it and put a bandaid on. No Neosporin. I’d wait until the parents got home. The only time I’d go against that is if the kid says that they usually put on neosporin. Then I’ll let the parent know when they get home.
1:33:52 it makes me sad how much this OP reminds me of my mom and dad. My dad is definitely a narcissist but has lots of “good qualities” that people looking from the outside would think he’s a great person. Now my mom has constant anxiety and I don’t think I’ve ever seen her let her hair down and just be herself. It’s like she always has this need to appear like the perfect wife for him. For example growing up we had to make sure the tv was off by the time my dad got home from work and appear to be doing something more productive, even if we had been watching something educational like Jeopardy, because otherwise he’d get upset with her for watching tv when there’s other “better” things he thought she should be doing. They seem to be doing better now that all the kids are out of the house (he had very high scholastic expectations of us kids, hence no tv because “we should be studying”) so I think she’s able to relax more. But their communication still sucks. If she’s upset about something he did and actually voices it, his apologies are typically “I’m sorry that you’re upset/ that you feel that way”
Anyways this went on for way too long though I definitely have more I could add 😅
My point was, I really hope this OP doesn’t end up in a similar situation. That man also should not be raising any kids until he solves that personality disorder
As a parent, if you haven't been told by me that my daughter has had it before call before giving her anything. If you know I have given her a medicine just give me a heads up you had to give her some. My aunt watches my daughter while I work and she always texts me about what foods she plans to give her (she 10 months old) if she knows she hasn't had it before.