RUclips doesn't want me to put links in the description for some reason, so you can find the songs used in the video here: ruclips.net/p/PL12W2bctViniWujdwbtNG6FkKHaVKJC5E and the videos used here: ruclips.net/p/PL12W2bctVingZd9W8hWfvxICFXURu14yC In this video I use a number of clips from Mikumentary, a docuseries by Tara Knight (commissioned by Crypton Future Media? It’s not really clear but I found it linked on the official Hatsune Miku channel). Despite only seeing this series for the first time after completing the script for this video, I found it echoed many of my sentiments with an almost eerie precision. It’s a fantastic introduction to Vocaloid as a cultural phenomenon: ruclips.net/p/PL-pKPpZ1Q5NZnmQL645uybZpYJMrrBrwm Other good videos for newcomers (or fans who haven’t seen them): ubnubmaster’s channel has a ton of great videos on all kinds of Vocaloid-related topics: ruclips.net/user/ubnubmaster The 2010 Miku’s Thanksgiving concert: ruclips.net/p/PLy6oYWskubP3AYxusHjdgmz4YgdUKptHf The amazing concert from which I took the Two-Faced Lovers and Magnet performances at the beginning and end of the video: ruclips.net/video/1lFtpMGL87s/видео.html MarceCloud 39!’s Many Voices of Vocaloids video series: ruclips.net/p/PL20DxXiH1meKXdb9S83ySeOHP_5h-FexW
this may sound cheesy but this video moved me to tears. Its been years since ive truly and shamelessly indulged in consuming vocaloid content because of the shame and embarrassment associated with it. I forbid myself from listening to the songs because i thought it would feed into my introverted tendencies. It makes you think how much you artificially mold and attempt to change your personality as you grow up, to the point where you end up suppressing the most unconventional parts of yourself for the sake of fitting in more (with varying results lol). I forgot how much it inspired me and meant to me back when i was a teenager. You get so used to people making jokes about it, it feels refreshing to see someone finally take it seriously. I think its how you said, the shame has held me back from truly exploring my creative potential as an artist and formerly aspiring animator. I have alot to think about, thank you. (Btw im the person who found you through your narumitsu fic and honestly i love your writing, please never stop making stuff)
i KNOW this was 2 months ago i'm sorry but this comment breaks my heart. When something has meaning to you, inspires you, that's all that matters. Anyone who laughs at that isn't worth paying attention to. You should never be held back from something you love by shame. What it means to you is all that matters. Stifling your innermost feelings is one of the worst things a person can do to themselves. Everyone should love what they love and embrace who they are wholeheartedly. I will always, always love vocaloid! it is a part of me. no one can take that away from me.
(Hey, this is like, really long and kinda depressing, so watch out) I first got into vocaloid about six years ago when I was ten. I remember the exact video I first heard Miku's voice. It was a fnaf comic dub about the purple guy and in the background of one of the comics Ievan Polkka was playing. I remember the feeling I had when I first heard her, no words in the english language can describe the strength of yearning I felt. I HAD to know who she was, I had to know NOW. It took some searching but after a while I finally found the Ievan Polkka dreamy theater video. After that I fell down the rabbit hole and became obsessed. Some of the first songs I remember listening to are World is Mine, Scissorloid, Secret Police, Matoryoshka, Senbonzakura, Shake It, Luka Luka Night Fever, and most importantly, World''s End Dance Hall. World's End Dance Hall was probably the third Vocaloid song I'd ever heard and it really solidified my love for it. I kinda feel like it awoken something in me, something I was missing before. Vocaloid was the first thing I loved. The first thing I thought of when I woke up was Miku and the last thought I had before falling asleep was of Miku. For a point in time, Miku was my only friend. I know it sounds stupid for me to say this but, Miku was kinda how i figured out that something was wrong with me. Wowaka was the first producer I ever followed closely. Something within his music really resonated with me, even before I knew what it meant. I remember listening to Rolling Girl and ,even though I didn't know what the lyrics were, related to it ( I have never self-harmed or attempted suicide, just letting you know). When I finally read the translations I figured it out, what spoke to me so much in his music, depression. I didn't know the word back then but i recognized the pure sorrow and loneliness that tied me to his music, but it didn't last for too long. Being an 11 year old with ADHD and no friends I decided to take Miku to everyone. I would not shut up about her. I had to let everyone know how amazing she was because if she could bring happiness to someone as sad like me what could she do for others? I just wanted to share my love for her, share the happiness she brought to me, but middle schoolers aren't that kind. I wasn't straight up bullied too much, every so often I would get verbally abused in the hallways but it wasn't as bad as it could have been. What really got me was the isolation, the stares, and the hushed comments. It was like I had the plague, "Don't get to close to her or you'll catch weeb fever!" I had no friends, even that loneliness was a void that Miku couldn't fill. So i statred to distance myself from it all. Even after I stopped listening to Vocaloid people still isolated me. It was almost like I committed a sin that no one would forgive me for. They wouldn't forget, I was still the weird emo weeb kid years after it happened. All I wanted was for people to like me and they refused to forgive me. I eventually made some friends, but I still remained distant with vocaloid. I convinced myself that it was some cringey phase that should've never happened. And I stayed away from the community for about four years until a few months ago. I was scrolling though my recommendeds and saw "Wowaka Tribute." Wowaka tribute? What happened? While I was away Wowaka had passed on and I didn't know until almost a year later. I was distraught. Never in my life has a death affected me so much, i've had family members die and have barely cared. I cried for hours. This man, whom I've never met, who lives on the other side of the world, who doesn't even speak the same language as me, who I hadn't thought of in years , died, and it crushed me. I listened to Rolling Girl and World's End Dance Hall for a solid hour. It must have been really weird for my parents to hear me scream crying "Mou Ikkai Mou Ikkai" and " Hoppu Suteppu" over and over again. After my breakdown I decided "well, since I'm on this side of the tracks I might as well stay for a bit." So i started to catch up on some of the stuff I missed and started to get back into it. The next day I brought out all my Miku figurines and posters and put them back up on my shelves. I finally ended up getting a Project Diva game and have sunk almost 200 hours in by now. I never want to leave her again. Miku was the first passion i had, she opened my eyes to a better and more creative world. She made me... me. And I owe her everything. Wow. This ended up being alot longer than it was supposed to be. I just wanted to say how much I loved Miku and I guess i've been holding in a bit more than I thought. Sorry for wasting your time if you ended up reading it all. I know its badly written, its late and in kind sad rn. I just really love Miku.
That was a really nice video ! As you said, Vocaloid served as a gateway for people to make a name for themselves in the industry. Don't quote me on that but I'm pretty sure that HoneyWorks started out making Vocaloid songs and now they've produced songs for Haikyuu, Gintama, Naruto and bunch of other huge anime. That's crazy cool
A lot of musicians on top of the Japanese charts have started from Vocaloid. Think about Eve, Yoasobi, Tatsuya Kitani, Ado and perhaps the most notable example - Kenshi Yonezu. All of these people have found success in an entirely organic way.
You know what amazes about Vocaloid? Like you, I was a Vocaloid fan in my early teens so many years ago.. and now I’m 26 and teaching English in Korea. I never thought I would see Vocaloid here but the grade 2 kids I teach are OBSESSED with a Korean cover of Daughter of Evil.. they have absolutely no idea that I also used to be obsessed with it and it’s hard to explain to them? Something about Vocaloid is so timeless. Whenever I stumble upon Vocaloid again, nostalgia hit and I relearn how good all these old songs are every single time. Wow.. I really spent a lot with Vocaloid back then and it’s still so precious. Thank you for your video for reminding me of that again.
I might be crying a bit after watching this video, but it's a good cry. I love it, even though I know nothing about vocaloid (only heard some songs but I never knew that ppl like sung the songs, and that's probably what ppl mean by "being into vocaloid" now that I think of it) I adore how you explored your love for things we loved as teenagers and that yes indeed we can carry that into adulthood. Also I liked how you mentioned that people were on thematic forums back in the day and how they had song quotes in signatures, really made me remember that that's how i got into most animes back then. Aside from this deeply emotional aspect I really love the narrative of this video, how the miku expo is featured at the beginning and end, and how you explain some basic concepts along the way (I never really knew what people meant by being a person behind a vocaloid but now I have an idea at least, and also the amateur aspect of it, something I also think wouldn't be here today, as you mentioned the "allowing yourself to be bad at things just because you have fun with it".... It's just a really good video, and I can really tell that vocaloid means a lot to you, and I love when people talk about things they like
Please always hold onto the feelings you expressed in this video. Please always love and admire what Vocaloid is and what it created. Please don’t let anyone take that feeling from you. Don’t become bitter and disgusted like I have after my years of dedicating my existence to this technology and the people who use it. Don’t ever loose your passion and don’t ever doubt the importance this digital singer had in your life. And thank you for letting me relive that feeling for myself if only for a brief moment
Vocaloid and Pokemon are the two things that I assumed as a kid would be completely gone and culturally irrelevant by the time I was an adult. I never imagined that the amateur animated music videos and niche songs I used to obsess over would turn into what it is today, but I’m so happy it did.
I relate so deeply to this video... I'm 21 now, but I've been a vocaloid fan easily since I was 11. It's been odd watching this community grow and shrink over the years. During this video, I foudn myself reflecting on those mid-late teenage years when my vocaloid/anime loving friends eventually grew out of it (and went on to trash their embarrassing weeb years and oh, how bad the music they listened to was)... but I've continued to love it all the same. I connected a lot with this video. Vocaloid is such an insane musical medium, so easily malleable to whomever decides to use it. It's amazing how these characters, these voices, can be used to tell any sort of story. I love that vocaloid can give absolutely anyone a voice. It's been amazing seeing producers pop up out of seemingly nowhere and make songs that resonate with so many people, and I'm now seeing producers that I loved growing up become big-name producers in the japanese music industry in general... I think Vocaloid is such an amazing thing. I really wished more people looked upon it fondly, rather than belittling it into this little hole of something they were into when they were at the peak of their weaboo phase. It's still so amazing.
as a 16 year old Vocaloid is starting to grow again which feels weird for me because im old enough it remember when it was big but Im also young enough that when i really got into it it was on the decline. I know a lot of young gamers got into vocaloid when Coryxkenshin used Miku Hatsune love ward as his plant momo's theme song. Also Im seeing more of it on tik tok and it makes me happy to know even if vocaloid isn't as big as it was when I first got into it, it's still around and not going away.
it’s video’s like these that help me realize i’m not alone in my childhood experiences :D thank u for making this!! your videos are some of my absolute favorites
Yesterday I occasionally stumbled upon the Higurashi video essays here due to pure curiosity, with all my prior knowledge of the material being one rather infamous picture of Shion's mad laughter. The essays were very thorough to say the least. But most importantly, they had that beautiful human element to them, a reflection of the personal experience of life and how it intertwines with the story, characters, and themes. And now I see that other videos on this channel are of similar genuineness regardless of the topic. Well, vocaloids are surely more familiar to me personally though. While experiences of each person are highly individual, something in this content is very resonating. The "content" in this case even sounds kinda belittling. These are real good touching stories - a bit melancholic yet always hopeful and sincere, certainly going from a growing person, a thinker. So I would like to express my solidarity with the way of constructing a purposeful life with a focus on acts of kindness and seeing the world through. Art is one of the keys to that without a doubt. Take care during this challenging year and have a blast with your Master's. And more power to such minds :)
This video moved me to tears; In a year full of heartbreak and sadness, Vocaloid has been there to comfort me, to help me get out my emotions as songs I relate to heavily play. Thank you so much for reminding me of how special Vocaloid truly is.
It's thanks to Vocaloid and Miku that I found some of my best friends at the same London concerts and I'll forever be grateful. I was lucky as a kid to have friends with the same interests as me in anime and adjacent media but as we grow up everyone sorta moved on and I stayed a fan and it sucked but I could never just leave Vocaloid behind. I found a home, a sanctuary in everything made and I just couldn't leave that behind. And then everything culminated on 2018 when Miku came to London for the first time and I made a bunch of badges to hand out to other fans cos that's what you do in this community. You look to give anyone like you a little moment of kindness like you've received from these producers who've put so much into their art. And I wouldn't have it any other way
I love your videos, they’re all just so full of emotions I can’t even explain. I wasn’t even that much into vocaloid. Idk but I wanted to leave a comment also for the algorithm
I haven't seen such an earnest and heartfelt video like this for a while now, and I'm at that point in time where I find myself becoming more distant from Vocaloid. Your video is encapsulating the feeling and passion of vocaloid with such nuisance and tenderness that left me feeling rather optimistic about change.
Vocaloid is a lot of things to me. However, above all, it's that it gives a voice to those who may not be able to sing for themselves that's really important to me. It's an extension of doujin culture as a whole, creation for the sole sake of creation and passion, and Vocaloid and UTAU made expression through the passion of music more accessible for everyone. Not only this, longtime Vocaloid producers that have been around for a decade now sport their own self-covers of their own vocaloid music, if you've noticed lately. That leap probably may not have happened without Vocaloid and solo work like that, as they would likely be arranging and producing amazing music but hiring a vocalist (or joining together with a vocalist as a circle) in their stead, as you see often in doujin circles all the time. And that isn't a bad thing, it's just that there's an option for solo being made more accessible that's beautiful. For me, the music produced on the way that have great meaning are also those that have stuck with me all these years, but it's the evolution of these producers and the role Vocaloid has filled in the doujin scene that truly makes me feel inspired. 11:00 On this point, I wanted to say that not only did small producers not know what it would become back then, even today I routinely find and follow Vocaloid producers here on RUclips that have less than 1000 subs and their songs only a few hundred views. I instinctively want to do my best to support those people because I respect that kind of passion so much.
So, I really am glad of watching this video. I have felt identified with this video, I have interests I don't really share with a lot of my friends, and this video has inspired me to do what I want, really good video, I enjoyed it. It's videos like these I like
I just wanted to say that this video brought tears to my eyes. Not in a bad way, but in a nostalgic, I just remembered how important vocaloid was to me. I don't listen so much more these days, sometimes one or another song, but I'm not so engaged in it as I was in my pre-teenage years.Yet it was something that greatly marked my life. Just like you, it was vocaloid the reason why I started to write fanfics... I don't write anymore, unfortunelly, but still, it was such a precious moment of my life. I used to listen Vocaloid all the time, it helped me a lot in difficult moments of life. There is so many type of songs... And, of course, in difficult times, there was also songs that reflected what I felt. I just wanted to thank you for remind me how precious vocaloid is to me, that even tho I don't listen just as much as before, it's still something that I hold dear.
I cant even begin to to tell you how much i love this video. I revisit it every once in a while to rewatch and read the experiences of other people with vocaloid in the comments thank you so much for this video.
higurashi and vocaloid, what a good channel. I got back into higurashi cause of the Onibi series of vocaloid songs which feel heavily inspired by the show.
This video is honestly so beautiful. I wish I found it sooner and I can't believe it only has 10k views! You articulate many of the thoughts I've had about vocaloid so well, and I can tell you're a writer because the script is just amazing. I always love seeing other people's love for this community. Thank you so much for making this video.
Woah, this has less then 5,000 views? This is amazing, it truly speaks to some of the experience of those who enjoy vocaloid. The longer the video went on the more I saw myself within your words. Thank you for this, it really touched my heart in a way I haven’t felt in a while.
Media like vocaloid is what got me though my teens. It let me know that I wasn't alone in the world and that other people had struggles that I was experiencing and overcame and made it through
This video was beautifully narrated, and your story brought back a lot of my own memories. A lot of these songs were like a good friend telling me I wasn't alone in my worries, struggles or an array of other feelings. If songs were friends, Rolling Girl was my closest. In sixth grade onward I was struggling to stay afloat in school for reasons I didn't understand, and neither did anyone else. I just couldn't bring myself to care about my classes, despite trying my hardest, and I felt all alone and completely hopeless. Hearing Miku shout "one more time" and the visual of her being crossed out really spoke to me and, somehow, I understood. I fought all the way to high school graduation, and it wasn't until after that I was diagnosed with ADHD. I am now 25 years old and working to improve myself every day. I'm creating a comic that I hope can come close to the beautiful authenticity that reached me in these songs. I don't know exactly what the future holds (do any of us really?) but I'm so glad I discovered Vocaloid and never gave up. I'm sure I have the producers and this community to thank for coming so far. Thank you for this video and the wonderful reminder. I hope to go to a concert one day, just hearing the cheers in those videos had me beaming.
been a big fan of your videos for a few months now, incidentally i've only seriously started to get into the world of vocaloids after just having passing familiarity for years and years. looking forward to sitting down and watching this!
As someone robbed of a proper childhood, I never felt that growing up meant throwing away what was dear to you. Out of spite, I've done the exact opposite. I've leaned in harder, but I also think that things people used to tease and bully me for have become more acceptable. So, no one's going to tease me for liking Vocaloid or anime anymore. To be honest, I love what I do regardless of who criticizes me or what people say. I'm not here to fit in. I'm here to do what I can to get through a life that almost ended before it began. My life was saved by what I loved as a child. Nothing in society can tell me to give that up. After awhile, a bunch of words about you in passing lose their meaning. You stop caring and you just want to enjoy your life in peace without adulthood having to be a barrier to that. You're only a child for so long, only a minor for so long, before the world acts like you have to throw it all away. No, you don't. If you love something, adulthood doesn't mean you have to throw it away. People can say it's "childish" or "weird," but being yourself is better than hiding away in fear of being judged. I never sacrificed myself to fit in. Nowadays, I'm reaping some consequences of that, but I still believe that being true to who you are is more important than society telling you who to be. As an adult, you do have more responsibilities and more to consider. You have less time, but that never means you have to lose what made you who you were to begin with. Never sacrifice anything that makes you happy. That childlike passion should always be treasured and protected. As adults, it's far too easy to take that away.
wonderfully narrated.. so well-spoken... you were able to perfectly pin down an era. your monotone voice somehow makes it all more solemn, thank you for this video ❤️
This is a great video. It beautifully illustrates how art can inspire someone and empowers them to manifest good things in their real life. I started out a fan of anime, vocaloid and videogames too. How they opened my eyes to new stories, my heart to other people's experiences how they enriched my life and understanding of the world and the people that live in it. How it made me want to make beautiful things too. Anime helped me practice drawing, undertale pushed me to make my first fanart and started my journey to becoming a professional artist. Without it I would have probably went to college for Business administration instead I am now studying to become an animator and digital illustrator. I finally have something I will live for and its all because of these nerdy things. When we make something, we will never know how it impacts someone else whether it whether it will reach anyone but as long as its made with heart it will always be worthwhile. just like your videos, your delivery might be described as monotone but there's no mistaking your videos and words are full of heart.
I love your videos so much. This video is honestly brilliant, so well put together and you can tell just how much Vocaloid means to you. I also got into Vocaloid around the same time you did and had similar experiences with it to you so this video really connected with me. I really hope that i can go to Miku Expo next time it comes to the UK, it looks so much fun and id love to experience it at least once!
This was such an excellent watch. It really struck a chord the way you describe the collective spirit of Vocaloid; how, despite how much it's grown, it will always be about giving a voice to even the most withdrawn teenager or salaryman. I was never part of the Vocaloid fandom but have had the same experiences of self expression, community and artistic inspiration within a similar niche Japanese subculture. So the experience you described felt almost universal in a way. I really liked the line "perfect is the enemy of good" and how you explore the way our own sense of shame and the misguided apathetic ideal of adulthood sometimes holds us back. To be completely honest, by the time you got to how so many of the people in the London concert were mostly adults paying their dues to their younger selves’ brazen, genuine passion, I was struggling to hold back my tears. lol. This feels like one of those videos that will stay with me for quite a while, so I'm glad I decided to watch this. So yeah 11/10 great job you made me feel so many things despite never really being deep into Vocaloid, lol. (And sorry for the wordy comment)
i dont think i could explain it in any better way to someone without any prior exposure to vocaloid what vocaloid is truly about and what hatsune miku means as a symbol other than showing them this, great video
oh wow, this brought everything back for me. im sitting here, crying my eyes out remembering how much passion and strength vocaloid gave me in my youth when i needed it the most. thank you so much for this video. thank you.
This video really hit home with me. I didn't have anyone to share my love of Vocaloid with among my friends and my sister - who was interested in anime as well and often one of the only people I could talk about this topic face to face on a regular basis - didn't get it either :( I felt so seen while watching this, so thanks for making me feel that way - I didn't realise how much I really needed it :)
I got deep into vocaloid in middle school, 7 years ago. I had that hyper focused desire that many children get where they need to know everything they can about their interest and for me it was anime, but I was raised in a household that was conservative and felt incredibly repressed. I had watched anime on Amazon prime because my parents didn’t realize that we had it and wouldn’t look at it, but I was also a child and was skeptical about what to get into because I wasn’t interested in the fan service in anime but primarily the aesthetics and romance. I’ve always been fixated with love, it was usually a societal expectation of children to hate romantic affection and the children I grew up around fell into that but I always loved love and that was even a shock to my parents. So I read the synopsis of Inuyasha and it filled everything I wanted, the violence startled me when I first came upon it but it was also less violent than deadman wonderland which I had watched 4 unsubbed episodes of on an airplane. It was a secret that completely engrossed me all of 5th grade and other kids my age were interested in watching anime, but those kids also didn’t have the resources available to actually watch what they were interested in. It was barely the mid 2010s by that point and while kids had access to RUclips the anime there was often in bad condition, obviously pirated but also notably underground. I wanted to get into anime but I didn’t have the background knowledge to know what to actually watch, and most kids didn’t either. I only even knew what anime was because my cousin had indulged in Pokémon when he had been younger and gave me his card and dvd collection. “Have you watched Nisekoi, you would really like it” “no, is that the one with the blonde girl with the red ribbon” “yeah, it’s so good” “she’s so pretty, I really want to watch it!” But those conversations were sporadic and those kids had access to streaming platforms I didn’t, because besides RUclips which I didn’t get into until I had the autonomy of a computer no one knew how to pirate stuff. Then when I got into middle school I met a friend who I regret the way I acted around because I was cruel, but I got into vocaloid because of her and learned how to watch anime on RUclips from the school iPads we got. The world was my oyster and I started by watching Childish war, then Circus monster while just absolutely binging Circus-P, the Story of Evil, googling if there was a Vocaloid anime, making AU’s in my head before I know what they were, getting more into fanfiction than I had been before, being a fucking weeb, etc. I’m an adult now but I think that I can speak for a lot of people when I say that a lot of my generations childhoods were defined by a middle school weeb phase which I would describe to myself as a nostalgic ugliness, I was of course ashamed for years of it but I think that the point Hazel made about that type of phase in her Elfen Lied video and how we were just doing the best we could with what we had deserves more credence. I think it’s important to recognize how awful the mental health of people were then but it’s also important to remember the eye in that storm, the solidarity of knowing that you had friends your age to talk to about your interests but also struggles, how that type of solidarity also functioned by forming a mini community of social outcasts, how painful the edginess was but how amusing it is in hindsight, the people online that were making content for people like you and validated your existence by showing you that there was a community of people like you that the internet enabled. That communal aspect is probably in some ways dead now, anime is now mainstream, streaming era have allowed anime to be more accessible to people that vocaloid was to me, classic anime is no longer elusive in the same way it was before and doesn’t really carry the same mythological fandom significance it did before but has changed into this vintage aesthetic of 90s nostalgia with emphasis on the heroine emulating a form of “bad bitch” femininity (though I also somewhat welcome this, I was never able to watch Evangelion in middle school or any Ghibli besides the time I caught Ponyo on Cable in my parents bedroom during a football game). The fandom changed (of course in a lot of good ways), it’s root in 2000s scene culture is only acknowledged with nostalgia and it kind of disintegrated and dispersed in a way where there is still an online anime fandom but anime is now cultural capital and many different demographics enjoy it. Black western people for instance have an actual set of anime they can watch and see people like them now like Michiko and Hatchin and Samurai Champloon, this is of course still with the fact that Japan still eroticizes gyaru type characters (also middle and high schoolers) that originally emerged partially as a subculture to imitate Amuro Namie and as a counter movement to strict dress codes and the necessity to assimilate into a homogenous idea of the ideal student. There’s more to that and I’ve been writing forever, in the wise words of Contrapoints at this point I assume we’re all just hanging out.
Can’t wait for more amazing content, this is probably the most human content I’ve endulged in. Aka a lot of feelings, thank you for sharing your experiences. This is more than entertainment
I've started watching your videos recently, and I had no idea you listened to vocaloid; I just thought "Oh, what a pleasant surprise, I wonder what this video could be about?" as it popped up in my recommended. I was already binging your video essays, so I already knew this was gonna be a journey for me since vocaloid always had a tendency to make me cry. This video hit me like a bat to the face; I haven't been filled with so many old memories in so long. It reminded me of when I would sit in my room, and draw miku in her Tricolore Airline outfit or gumi in her alice in wonderland style dress from Eat Me. This video reminded me that, I did all of those things to enjoy myself. I did it for a sheer passion and love for it, and because I wanted a way to say thank you or find people who felt the same way. I pushed aside others just to be able to hang a poster or two and put figurines on my shelves, because I loved Miku ever since I even knew what a phone was. I always indulged in things such as vocaloid and various other fandoms that told me that "Who cares if you're judged? If you'll fail? Do it because you love it!" and I have been trying to live my life with that message. But as I moved on, I learned more about myself, my ADHD, and the anxiety of isolating myself for something I didn't even care about anymore. I told myself I regretted being so weird when I first moved to my new school and talking all about miku. This anxiety built up all the way to high school, where I now stand. (I know Im not very old haha) Right as I was watching this video, I was doing the one thing I currently hated the most; drawing. I needed it for a project; of course I had to. And earlier in the same day I lost every single drawing I did back in my vocaloid times just because my parents reset my data and forced me to delete and reinstall the app. I didn't even miss those drawings, I hated how they looked anyways. But after watching this video, seeing the value I put into each of those drawings, I can't help but miss them. I can't even describe how typing this out is slowly breaking my heart. It reminded me of their value, how much time and effort I put into not only my vocaloid drawings, but everything beyond that. How my passion for video games, anime, and even art itself were being expressed through every single one of those drawings I half-assed at the time. But even if I can't look behind me anymore, I'm gonna try to look forward. I may not have my representation and progress of that love anymore, and of one of my biggest passions, but I still have it inside me. Today I was reminded of what I"m capable of doing if it's for something I love, and I will continue to grow just to pursue this passion. You didn't have to make this video, especially when you had no idea if anyone at all was going to view it. I can't help but go through some of my older playlists now just to relisten to some of the classics as well. Thank you for reaching out and connecting with me.
I know this video will soon be 3 years old soon but just. Goddamn to say this video hit fucking hard and closely is such a huge understatement. I’m still in the start of high school so i was quite late compared to most of the party and there was probably a lot of stuff that changed from then and now but half of the cycle and experience of yours that you described, and likely similar to also many others reminded me a lot of mine. I was also on the internet way wayyy younger then i should have ever been (luckily i don’t have that many deep traumas related to vocaloid, and im sorry to any fucked up shit you had to witness.) and i heard about Miku before, but what made me really fall in love with it was the specific day i first found rolling girl. As silly as it sounds, around in 3rd grade was probably one of the hardest time of my life. I have been having to take medicines for anxiety and depression and going to serious therapy since around i was 7, which i feel like says already quite a lot. That plus other odd mannerisms of mine that i still have to figure out in the future put me trough such a hard time besides them just being a part of me, being in i was in a school that only saw value in brain smarts and overworked and studied their students as young as elementary to death and in which for the person i was and all my mental health issues was treated like some monster and parasite by the school staff,my peers and basically everything. But as one day as i was going on youtube, some odd song in japanese that was using the familiar blue haired girl popped up in which i clicked and… words can’t really describe at all the magical feeling i had the second those piano notes in the start hit. It didn’t even had the lyrics which i would still not understand the most when i first looked them up but i felt seen. I felt heard. All of what that robotic anime girl’s voice was shouting was just what i felt. And from there i was OBSESSED. Like stated, i was a “weird” little kid and art, be it music, animation etc was my biggest passion and just one of the things in the entire universe i value and enjoy the most and when i went to start diving and search out of more curiosity about that teal pony tailed girl and what her and all the other silly characters that sang with her really were i was oh so mesmerized and captivated by the fact these wacky voices and characters were just this ultimate tool of art that just. connected others and made making truly wonderful peaces of art this personal and easy (((for the most part))) and since then just… Yeah i dont have words to describe the ride that was falling into this world like you did. And like you i also never and still don’t get the appeal or am able to properly follow and have this much dedications to bands or artist with the exception of vocaloid producers and groups i still can’t really reason why. I have liked vocaloid a lot less before and my current experience wasn’t as lively as it was with my first encounters with it on late childhood to early pre teens but goooodd i still love it to death. Idk if im ever going to a Miku/Vocaloid expo or concert as in i live in latin america which for some odd reason still never had a SINGLE one of those in any of it’s country for some reason so i don’t know how close of a possibility there is for it to be somewhere near me but with the possibility of me staying to study in a place in the west in a near future and my mom seeing more miku stuff in a regular old ass clothing store we have in my city, i have hopes. And either way when it comes i feel like i’ll just cry tears of joys and it is still one of my biggest dreams. I can’t imagine me, my life, my passions and the person i am without vocaloid as it’s just that important to me. Thank you so much and rest in the most peace possible wowaka and thank you for properly introducing me to this world and just. making my life better and introducing what i had myself escape into in some of the most harsh moments of my life. This is wayyyy too long of a comment that probably isn’t even well structured but i came into this channel because of higurashi stuff i found and really like but yeah just so. Delighted by this video and reminder of all the similar experiences of lifes changed for the better or worse by vocaloid like mine. Stay safe and i loved this video
This is a really exceptional retrospective. The experiences you shared about growing up within the Vocaloid community feel parallel to my own in the online j-rock scene and text-based role playing forums of the early 2000s. Thank you for making this video. It's made me feel seen in a way I didn't think was possible.
This video resonated with me so much! With that shot in the dark feeling of creating something against all odds. and The want to connect to other people with shared passions. This is such a heartfelt video and i’m so glad I watched it. It makes me want to keep creating, to keep looking for connection and to keep going. Thank you!
I teared up. At times it felt like you were saying everything I wish I could say about this, too. Thank you for making this video and sharing your story. :)
Happy birthday to you!!! I wish you all the best! May your desires come true! Personally, when it comes to music (in general) I don't know too much, so this was kinda my introduction to Vocaloid. It was great hearing you talking about it, about your past and about what it means to you! Great video!
The way you talk about Vocaloid reminds me of how the Sonic the Hedgehog series/fandom. It and this girl back in 7th grade is what got me started drawing, making characters, and into internet culture. I'm not really into the series anymore and it's embarrassing looking back on not only my art but the way I talked, but I wouldn't change it for the world.
You are making such great videos ! Thank you for sharing your experiences with higurashi and vocaloid also i like your voice a lot , keep up the good work you have my support ^^
This is a weird one for me, as I've never really gotten into Vocaloid. And yet, a lot of the things you discussed here mirrored my own experiences in other places. So for something that I clicked out of curiousity about how someone viewed Vocaloid, this hit surprisngly deep. Also, major props to you for being so open about something that feels so personal. P.S. I hope you have a good Christmas, despite how poorly the government has handled everything.
great great video! 💛 vocaloid will always be a part of me no matter how much or how few i'll listen to it in the future. even if it's just on my own, without connections, maybe against the purpose of it.. it's just how it is. to me it's all about the emotions it evoked, made me feel *something* in this desert like existence✌️
This is one of the most relatable videos ever, I entered the Fandom just before it's dying days, and I stepped away after I mentally couldn't, now I'm growing more comfortable with it again.
I like your video taught me a lot about history of vocaloid I wish miku was real her songs forever changed my life and how I view things interpret feelings and taught me a new language that I’ve always wanted to know thank you miku sama永遠に感謝しています I hope to attend a concert in my life I genuinely think I have a good chance of passing out
You did an amazing job. The link in the description thing is easier in the android version of Studio, but even then the glitches, gods they suck. I'm an indie Engloid Producer, and not being able to link to the nico nico playlist I put my project, #TheMultiSphereProject, on is, literally, the worst.
@@_bess Thank you! As a fan of both higurashi and vocaloid I've been following your videos since last year. Keep up the good work and remember to have fun and relax when you can! I really appreciate the content you make.
If anyone complains about your monotone narration ever again, please know that popular storytellers such as Paranormal Scholar exists with the same approach: ruclips.net/channel/UCfj9TK1mhbIWpcmP5rcIfYQ I feel you to be the same in soothing narration as this content creator, so please keep going and voicing your thoughts and feelings!
RUclips doesn't want me to put links in the description for some reason, so you can find the songs used in the video here: ruclips.net/p/PL12W2bctViniWujdwbtNG6FkKHaVKJC5E and the videos used here: ruclips.net/p/PL12W2bctVingZd9W8hWfvxICFXURu14yC
In this video I use a number of clips from Mikumentary, a docuseries by Tara Knight (commissioned by Crypton Future Media? It’s not really clear but I found it linked on the official Hatsune Miku channel). Despite only seeing this series for the first time after completing the script for this video, I found it echoed many of my sentiments with an almost eerie precision. It’s a fantastic introduction to Vocaloid as a cultural phenomenon: ruclips.net/p/PL-pKPpZ1Q5NZnmQL645uybZpYJMrrBrwm
Other good videos for newcomers (or fans who haven’t seen them):
ubnubmaster’s channel has a ton of great videos on all kinds of Vocaloid-related topics: ruclips.net/user/ubnubmaster
The 2010 Miku’s Thanksgiving concert: ruclips.net/p/PLy6oYWskubP3AYxusHjdgmz4YgdUKptHf
The amazing concert from which I took the Two-Faced Lovers and Magnet performances at the beginning and end of the video: ruclips.net/video/1lFtpMGL87s/видео.html
MarceCloud 39!’s Many Voices of Vocaloids video series: ruclips.net/p/PL20DxXiH1meKXdb9S83ySeOHP_5h-FexW
this may sound cheesy but this video moved me to tears. Its been years since ive truly and shamelessly indulged in consuming vocaloid content because of the shame and embarrassment associated with it. I forbid myself from listening to the songs because i thought it would feed into my introverted tendencies. It makes you think how much you artificially mold and attempt to change your personality as you grow up, to the point where you end up suppressing the most unconventional parts of yourself for the sake of fitting in more (with varying results lol). I forgot how much it inspired me and meant to me back when i was a teenager. You get so used to people making jokes about it, it feels refreshing to see someone finally take it seriously. I think its how you said, the shame has held me back from truly exploring my creative potential as an artist and formerly aspiring animator. I have alot to think about, thank you.
(Btw im the person who found you through your narumitsu fic and honestly i love your writing, please never stop making stuff)
I'm so glad the video resonated with you and this comment means a lot to me, thank you so much 💗
i KNOW this was 2 months ago i'm sorry but this comment breaks my heart. When something has meaning to you, inspires you, that's all that matters. Anyone who laughs at that isn't worth paying attention to. You should never be held back from something you love by shame. What it means to you is all that matters. Stifling your innermost feelings is one of the worst things a person can do to themselves. Everyone should love what they love and embrace who they are wholeheartedly.
I will always, always love vocaloid! it is a part of me. no one can take that away from me.
(Hey, this is like, really long and kinda depressing, so watch out)
I first got into vocaloid about six years ago when I was ten. I remember the exact video I first heard Miku's voice. It was a fnaf comic dub about the purple guy and in the background of one of the comics Ievan Polkka was playing. I remember the feeling I had when I first heard her, no words in the english language can describe the strength of yearning I felt. I HAD to know who she was, I had to know NOW.
It took some searching but after a while I finally found the Ievan Polkka dreamy theater video. After that I fell down the rabbit hole and became obsessed. Some of the first songs I remember listening to are World is Mine, Scissorloid, Secret Police, Matoryoshka, Senbonzakura, Shake It, Luka Luka Night Fever, and most importantly, World''s End Dance Hall. World's End Dance Hall was probably the third Vocaloid song I'd ever heard and it really solidified my love for it. I kinda feel like it awoken something in me, something I was missing before.
Vocaloid was the first thing I loved. The first thing I thought of when I woke up was Miku and the last thought I had before falling asleep was of Miku. For a point in time, Miku was my only friend. I know it sounds stupid for me to say this but, Miku was kinda how i figured out that something was wrong with me.
Wowaka was the first producer I ever followed closely. Something within his music really resonated with me, even before I knew what it meant. I remember listening to Rolling Girl and ,even though I didn't know what the lyrics were, related to it ( I have never self-harmed or attempted suicide, just letting you know). When I finally read the translations I figured it out, what spoke to me so much in his music, depression. I didn't know the word back then but i recognized the pure sorrow and loneliness that tied me to his music, but it didn't last for too long.
Being an 11 year old with ADHD and no friends I decided to take Miku to everyone. I would not shut up about her. I had to let everyone know how amazing she was because if she could bring happiness to someone as sad like me what could she do for others? I just wanted to share my love for her, share the happiness she brought to me, but middle schoolers aren't that kind.
I wasn't straight up bullied too much, every so often I would get verbally abused in the hallways but it wasn't as bad as it could have been. What really got me was the isolation, the stares, and the hushed comments. It was like I had the plague, "Don't get to close to her or you'll catch weeb fever!" I had no friends, even that loneliness was a void that Miku couldn't fill. So i statred to distance myself from it all.
Even after I stopped listening to Vocaloid people still isolated me. It was almost like I committed a sin that no one would forgive me for. They wouldn't forget, I was still the weird emo weeb kid years after it happened. All I wanted was for people to like me and they refused to forgive me.
I eventually made some friends, but I still remained distant with vocaloid. I convinced myself that it was some cringey phase that should've never happened. And I stayed away from the community for about four years until a few months ago.
I was scrolling though my recommendeds and saw "Wowaka Tribute." Wowaka tribute? What happened? While I was away Wowaka had passed on and I didn't know until almost a year later. I was distraught. Never in my life has a death affected me so much, i've had family members die and have barely cared. I cried for hours. This man, whom I've never met, who lives on the other side of the world, who doesn't even speak the same language as me, who I hadn't thought of in years , died, and it crushed me. I listened to Rolling Girl and World's End Dance Hall for a solid hour. It must have been really weird for my parents to hear me scream crying "Mou Ikkai Mou Ikkai" and " Hoppu Suteppu" over and over again.
After my breakdown I decided "well, since I'm on this side of the tracks I might as well stay for a bit." So i started to catch up on some of the stuff I missed and started to get back into it. The next day I brought out all my Miku figurines and posters and put them back up on my shelves. I finally ended up getting a Project Diva game and have sunk almost 200 hours in by now. I never want to leave her again. Miku was the first passion i had, she opened my eyes to a better and more creative world. She made me... me. And I owe her everything.
Wow. This ended up being alot longer than it was supposed to be. I just wanted to say how much I loved Miku and I guess i've been holding in a bit more than I thought. Sorry for wasting your time if you ended up reading it all. I know its badly written, its late and in kind sad rn. I just really love Miku.
That was a really nice video ! As you said, Vocaloid served as a gateway for people to make a name for themselves in the industry. Don't quote me on that but I'm pretty sure that HoneyWorks started out making Vocaloid songs and now they've produced songs for Haikyuu, Gintama, Naruto and bunch of other huge anime. That's crazy cool
Thanks Jiffy! And yep they did! It's so amazing how it's made careers in the music and anime industries more accessible for so many people
Kenshi Yonezu/Hachi sang the 2nd OP for Boku no Hero Academia. My mind was blown when I learned that.
A lot of musicians on top of the Japanese charts have started from Vocaloid. Think about Eve, Yoasobi, Tatsuya Kitani, Ado and perhaps the most notable example - Kenshi Yonezu. All of these people have found success in an entirely organic way.
You know what amazes about Vocaloid? Like you, I was a Vocaloid fan in my early teens so many years ago.. and now I’m 26 and teaching English in Korea. I never thought I would see Vocaloid here but the grade 2 kids I teach are OBSESSED with a Korean cover of Daughter of Evil.. they have absolutely no idea that I also used to be obsessed with it and it’s hard to explain to them? Something about Vocaloid is so timeless. Whenever I stumble upon Vocaloid again, nostalgia hit and I relearn how good all these old songs are every single time. Wow.. I really spent a lot with Vocaloid back then and it’s still so precious. Thank you for your video for reminding me of that again.
You have such a talent for being honest and uplifting with your stuff. Thank you for sharing.
Too monotone? Not from where I stand.
I am too emotive. I wish I had a more steady affect like you.
Also I love ur channel ur so talented
I might be crying a bit after watching this video, but it's a good cry. I love it, even though I know nothing about vocaloid (only heard some songs but I never knew that ppl like sung the songs, and that's probably what ppl mean by "being into vocaloid" now that I think of it) I adore how you explored your love for things we loved as teenagers and that yes indeed we can carry that into adulthood. Also I liked how you mentioned that people were on thematic forums back in the day and how they had song quotes in signatures, really made me remember that that's how i got into most animes back then.
Aside from this deeply emotional aspect I really love the narrative of this video, how the miku expo is featured at the beginning and end, and how you explain some basic concepts along the way (I never really knew what people meant by being a person behind a vocaloid but now I have an idea at least, and also the amateur aspect of it, something I also think wouldn't be here today, as you mentioned the "allowing yourself to be bad at things just because you have fun with it"....
It's just a really good video, and I can really tell that vocaloid means a lot to you, and I love when people talk about things they like
Thank you so much Iki
Please always hold onto the feelings you expressed in this video. Please always love and admire what Vocaloid is and what it created. Please don’t let anyone take that feeling from you. Don’t become bitter and disgusted like I have after my years of dedicating my existence to this technology and the people who use it. Don’t ever loose your passion and don’t ever doubt the importance this digital singer had in your life.
And thank you for letting me relive that feeling for myself if only for a brief moment
Exactly. Always hold onto those reasons.
I'm in tears. I never thought I could hear the words that describe what I feel for Vocaloid. Bess thank you for moving my heart with such kindness.
Vocaloid and Pokemon are the two things that I assumed as a kid would be completely gone and culturally irrelevant by the time I was an adult. I never imagined that the amateur animated music videos and niche songs I used to obsess over would turn into what it is today, but I’m so happy it did.
I really like your voice and how calm it is. It keeps me from getting overstimulated.
This is easily one of the rawest videos I've ever watched. I can hardly come up with words that do it justice.
goddamn I love vocaloid... this moved me to tears, thank you for putting my feelings into words :)
Wow, that was amazing. Easily the best video you have made yet, and probably one of my favourite RUclips videos of all time in general.
Thank you so much!
I relate so deeply to this video... I'm 21 now, but I've been a vocaloid fan easily since I was 11. It's been odd watching this community grow and shrink over the years. During this video, I foudn myself reflecting on those mid-late teenage years when my vocaloid/anime loving friends eventually grew out of it (and went on to trash their embarrassing weeb years and oh, how bad the music they listened to was)... but I've continued to love it all the same. I connected a lot with this video. Vocaloid is such an insane musical medium, so easily malleable to whomever decides to use it. It's amazing how these characters, these voices, can be used to tell any sort of story. I love that vocaloid can give absolutely anyone a voice. It's been amazing seeing producers pop up out of seemingly nowhere and make songs that resonate with so many people, and I'm now seeing producers that I loved growing up become big-name producers in the japanese music industry in general... I think Vocaloid is such an amazing thing. I really wished more people looked upon it fondly, rather than belittling it into this little hole of something they were into when they were at the peak of their weaboo phase. It's still so amazing.
as a 16 year old Vocaloid is starting to grow again which feels weird for me because im old enough it remember when it was big but Im also young enough that when i really got into it it was on the decline. I know a lot of young gamers got into vocaloid when Coryxkenshin used Miku Hatsune love ward as his plant momo's theme song. Also Im seeing more of it on tik tok and it makes me happy to know even if vocaloid isn't as big as it was when I first got into it, it's still around and not going away.
it’s video’s like these that help me realize i’m not alone in my childhood experiences :D thank u for making this!! your videos are some of my absolute favorites
Yesterday I occasionally stumbled upon the Higurashi video essays here due to pure curiosity, with all my prior knowledge of the material being one rather infamous picture of Shion's mad laughter.
The essays were very thorough to say the least. But most importantly, they had that beautiful human element to them, a reflection of the personal experience of life and how it intertwines with the story, characters, and themes. And now I see that other videos on this channel are of similar genuineness regardless of the topic. Well, vocaloids are surely more familiar to me personally though.
While experiences of each person are highly individual, something in this content is very resonating. The "content" in this case even sounds kinda belittling. These are real good touching stories - a bit melancholic yet always hopeful and sincere, certainly going from a growing person, a thinker.
So I would like to express my solidarity with the way of constructing a purposeful life with a focus on acts of kindness and seeing the world through. Art is one of the keys to that without a doubt.
Take care during this challenging year and have a blast with your Master's.
And more power to such minds :)
Thank you so much, this is a lovely comment. I really appreciate it.
This video moved me to tears; In a year full of heartbreak and sadness, Vocaloid has been there to comfort me, to help me get out my emotions as songs I relate to heavily play. Thank you so much for reminding me of how special Vocaloid truly is.
It's thanks to Vocaloid and Miku that I found some of my best friends at the same London concerts and I'll forever be grateful. I was lucky as a kid to have friends with the same interests as me in anime and adjacent media but as we grow up everyone sorta moved on and I stayed a fan and it sucked but I could never just leave Vocaloid behind. I found a home, a sanctuary in everything made and I just couldn't leave that behind. And then everything culminated on 2018 when Miku came to London for the first time and I made a bunch of badges to hand out to other fans cos that's what you do in this community. You look to give anyone like you a little moment of kindness like you've received from these producers who've put so much into their art. And I wouldn't have it any other way
I love your videos, they’re all just so full of emotions I can’t even explain. I wasn’t even that much into vocaloid. Idk but I wanted to leave a comment also for the algorithm
Didn't expect to hear Yunosuke as BGM. Good stuff
I haven't seen such an earnest and heartfelt video like this for a while now, and I'm at that point in time where I find myself becoming more distant from Vocaloid. Your video is encapsulating the feeling and passion of vocaloid with such nuisance and tenderness that left me feeling rather optimistic about change.
Vocaloid is a lot of things to me. However, above all, it's that it gives a voice to those who may not be able to sing for themselves that's really important to me. It's an extension of doujin culture as a whole, creation for the sole sake of creation and passion, and Vocaloid and UTAU made expression through the passion of music more accessible for everyone. Not only this, longtime Vocaloid producers that have been around for a decade now sport their own self-covers of their own vocaloid music, if you've noticed lately. That leap probably may not have happened without Vocaloid and solo work like that, as they would likely be arranging and producing amazing music but hiring a vocalist (or joining together with a vocalist as a circle) in their stead, as you see often in doujin circles all the time. And that isn't a bad thing, it's just that there's an option for solo being made more accessible that's beautiful.
For me, the music produced on the way that have great meaning are also those that have stuck with me all these years, but it's the evolution of these producers and the role Vocaloid has filled in the doujin scene that truly makes me feel inspired.
11:00 On this point, I wanted to say that not only did small producers not know what it would become back then, even today I routinely find and follow Vocaloid producers here on RUclips that have less than 1000 subs and their songs only a few hundred views. I instinctively want to do my best to support those people because I respect that kind of passion so much.
So, I really am glad of watching this video. I have felt identified with this video, I have interests I don't really share with a lot of my friends, and this video has inspired me to do what I want, really good video, I enjoyed it.
It's videos like these I like
I just wanted to say that this video brought tears to my eyes. Not in a bad way, but in a nostalgic, I just remembered how important vocaloid was to me. I don't listen so much more these days, sometimes one or another song, but I'm not so engaged in it as I was in my pre-teenage years.Yet it was something that greatly marked my life. Just like you, it was vocaloid the reason why I started to write fanfics... I don't write anymore, unfortunelly, but still, it was such a precious moment of my life. I used to listen Vocaloid all the time, it helped me a lot in difficult moments of life. There is so many type of songs... And, of course, in difficult times, there was also songs that reflected what I felt. I just wanted to thank you for remind me how precious vocaloid is to me, that even tho I don't listen just as much as before, it's still something that I hold dear.
I cant even begin to to tell you how much i love this video. I revisit it every once in a while to rewatch and read the experiences of other people with vocaloid in the comments
thank you so much for this video.
Thank you so much for the comment!!
higurashi and vocaloid, what a good channel. I got back into higurashi cause of the Onibi series of vocaloid songs which feel heavily inspired by the show.
This video is honestly so beautiful. I wish I found it sooner and I can't believe it only has 10k views! You articulate many of the thoughts I've had about vocaloid so well, and I can tell you're a writer because the script is just amazing. I always love seeing other people's love for this community. Thank you so much for making this video.
Woah, this has less then 5,000 views? This is amazing, it truly speaks to some of the experience of those who enjoy vocaloid. The longer the video went on the more I saw myself within your words. Thank you for this, it really touched my heart in a way I haven’t felt in a while.
Media like vocaloid is what got me though my teens. It let me know that I wasn't alone in the world and that other people had struggles that I was experiencing and overcame and made it through
This video was beautifully narrated, and your story brought back a lot of my own memories. A lot of these songs were like a good friend telling me I wasn't alone in my worries, struggles or an array of other feelings.
If songs were friends, Rolling Girl was my closest. In sixth grade onward I was struggling to stay afloat in school for reasons I didn't understand, and neither did anyone else. I just couldn't bring myself to care about my classes, despite trying my hardest, and I felt all alone and completely hopeless. Hearing Miku shout "one more time" and the visual of her being crossed out really spoke to me and, somehow, I understood. I fought all the way to high school graduation, and it wasn't until after that I was diagnosed with ADHD.
I am now 25 years old and working to improve myself every day. I'm creating a comic that I hope can come close to the beautiful authenticity that reached me in these songs. I don't know exactly what the future holds (do any of us really?) but I'm so glad I discovered Vocaloid and never gave up. I'm sure I have the producers and this community to thank for coming so far. Thank you for this video and the wonderful reminder. I hope to go to a concert one day, just hearing the cheers in those videos had me beaming.
been a big fan of your videos for a few months now, incidentally i've only seriously started to get into the world of vocaloids after just having passing familiarity for years and years. looking forward to sitting down and watching this!
As someone robbed of a proper childhood, I never felt that growing up meant throwing away what was dear to you. Out of spite, I've done the exact opposite. I've leaned in harder, but I also think that things people used to tease and bully me for have become more acceptable. So, no one's going to tease me for liking Vocaloid or anime anymore.
To be honest, I love what I do regardless of who criticizes me or what people say. I'm not here to fit in. I'm here to do what I can to get through a life that almost ended before it began. My life was saved by what I loved as a child. Nothing in society can tell me to give that up.
After awhile, a bunch of words about you in passing lose their meaning. You stop caring and you just want to enjoy your life in peace without adulthood having to be a barrier to that. You're only a child for so long, only a minor for so long, before the world acts like you have to throw it all away.
No, you don't. If you love something, adulthood doesn't mean you have to throw it away. People can say it's "childish" or "weird," but being yourself is better than hiding away in fear of being judged.
I never sacrificed myself to fit in. Nowadays, I'm reaping some consequences of that, but I still believe that being true to who you are is more important than society telling you who to be. As an adult, you do have more responsibilities and more to consider. You have less time, but that never means you have to lose what made you who you were to begin with. Never sacrifice anything that makes you happy. That childlike passion should always be treasured and protected. As adults, it's far too easy to take that away.
this video was amazing. you laid out the words so i can explain why vocaloid is so special to me.
bess this made me cry
SAM!
wonderfully narrated.. so well-spoken... you were able to perfectly pin down an era. your monotone voice somehow makes it all more solemn, thank you for this video ❤️
This is a great video. It beautifully illustrates how art can inspire someone and empowers them to manifest good things in their real life. I started out a fan of anime, vocaloid and videogames too. How they opened my eyes to new stories, my heart to other people's experiences how they enriched my life and understanding of the world and the people that live in it. How it made me want to make beautiful things too. Anime helped me practice drawing, undertale pushed me to make my first fanart and started my journey to becoming a professional artist. Without it I would have probably went to college for Business administration instead I am now studying to become an animator and digital illustrator. I finally have something I will live for and its all because of these nerdy things. When we make something, we will never know how it impacts someone else whether it whether it will reach anyone but as long as its made with heart it will always be worthwhile. just like your videos, your delivery might be described as monotone but there's no mistaking your videos and words are full of heart.
I love your videos so much. This video is honestly brilliant, so well put together and you can tell just how much Vocaloid means to you. I also got into Vocaloid around the same time you did and had similar experiences with it to you so this video really connected with me. I really hope that i can go to Miku Expo next time it comes to the UK, it looks so much fun and id love to experience it at least once!
Thank you so much!! It's really comforting to hear that actually. It's been such a crazy journey! And I really hope you get the chance to go 😊
This was such an excellent watch. It really struck a chord the way you describe the collective spirit of Vocaloid; how, despite how much it's grown, it will always be about giving a voice to even the most withdrawn teenager or salaryman. I was never part of the Vocaloid fandom but have had the same experiences of self expression, community and artistic inspiration within a similar niche Japanese subculture. So the experience you described felt almost universal in a way. I really liked the line "perfect is the enemy of good" and how you explore the way our own sense of shame and the misguided apathetic ideal of adulthood sometimes holds us back.
To be completely honest, by the time you got to how so many of the people in the London concert were mostly adults paying their dues to their younger selves’ brazen, genuine passion, I was struggling to hold back my tears. lol.
This feels like one of those videos that will stay with me for quite a while, so I'm glad I decided to watch this.
So yeah 11/10 great job you made me feel so many things despite never really being deep into Vocaloid, lol. (And sorry for the wordy comment)
I'm so glad you enjoyed the video!
i dont think i could explain it in any better way to someone without any prior exposure to vocaloid what vocaloid is truly about and what hatsune miku means as a symbol other than showing them this, great video
you put into words the same feelings i've knew i had but didn't knew how to explain
i'm not crying i'm not crying i'm not crying i'm not cryi
oh wow, this brought everything back for me. im sitting here, crying my eyes out remembering how much passion and strength vocaloid gave me in my youth when i needed it the most. thank you so much for this video. thank you.
This video really hit home with me. I didn't have anyone to share my love of Vocaloid with among my friends and my sister - who was interested in anime as well and often one of the only people I could talk about this topic face to face on a regular basis - didn't get it either :( I felt so seen while watching this, so thanks for making me feel that way - I didn't realise how much I really needed it :)
this was an amazing video, thank you so much for uploading this
I got deep into vocaloid in middle school, 7 years ago. I had that hyper focused desire that many children get where they need to know everything they can about their interest and for me it was anime, but I was raised in a household that was conservative and felt incredibly repressed. I had watched anime on Amazon prime because my parents didn’t realize that we had it and wouldn’t look at it, but I was also a child and was skeptical about what to get into because I wasn’t interested in the fan service in anime but primarily the aesthetics and romance. I’ve always been fixated with love, it was usually a societal expectation of children to hate romantic affection and the children I grew up around fell into that but I always loved love and that was even a shock to my parents. So I read the synopsis of Inuyasha and it filled everything I wanted, the violence startled me when I first came upon it but it was also less violent than deadman wonderland which I had watched 4 unsubbed episodes of on an airplane. It was a secret that completely engrossed me all of 5th grade and other kids my age were interested in watching anime, but those kids also didn’t have the resources available to actually watch what they were interested in. It was barely the mid 2010s by that point and while kids had access to RUclips the anime there was often in bad condition, obviously pirated but also notably underground. I wanted to get into anime but I didn’t have the background knowledge to know what to actually watch, and most kids didn’t either. I only even knew what anime was because my cousin had indulged in Pokémon when he had been younger and gave me his card and dvd collection. “Have you watched Nisekoi, you would really like it” “no, is that the one with the blonde girl with the red ribbon” “yeah, it’s so good” “she’s so pretty, I really want to watch it!” But those conversations were sporadic and those kids had access to streaming platforms I didn’t, because besides RUclips which I didn’t get into until I had the autonomy of a computer no one knew how to pirate stuff. Then when I got into middle school I met a friend who I regret the way I acted around because I was cruel, but I got into vocaloid because of her and learned how to watch anime on RUclips from the school iPads we got. The world was my oyster and I started by watching Childish war, then Circus monster while just absolutely binging Circus-P, the Story of Evil, googling if there was a Vocaloid anime, making AU’s in my head before I know what they were, getting more into fanfiction than I had been before, being a fucking weeb, etc. I’m an adult now but I think that I can speak for a lot of people when I say that a lot of my generations childhoods were defined by a middle school weeb phase which I would describe to myself as a nostalgic ugliness, I was of course ashamed for years of it but I think that the point Hazel made about that type of phase in her Elfen Lied video and how we were just doing the best we could with what we had deserves more credence. I think it’s important to recognize how awful the mental health of people were then but it’s also important to remember the eye in that storm, the solidarity of knowing that you had friends your age to talk to about your interests but also struggles, how that type of solidarity also functioned by forming a mini community of social outcasts, how painful the edginess was but how amusing it is in hindsight, the people online that were making content for people like you and validated your existence by showing you that there was a community of people like you that the internet enabled. That communal aspect is probably in some ways dead now, anime is now mainstream, streaming era have allowed anime to be more accessible to people that vocaloid was to me, classic anime is no longer elusive in the same way it was before and doesn’t really carry the same mythological fandom significance it did before but has changed into this vintage aesthetic of 90s nostalgia with emphasis on the heroine emulating a form of “bad bitch” femininity (though I also somewhat welcome this, I was never able to watch Evangelion in middle school or any Ghibli besides the time I caught Ponyo on Cable in my parents bedroom during a football game). The fandom changed (of course in a lot of good ways), it’s root in 2000s scene culture is only acknowledged with nostalgia and it kind of disintegrated and dispersed in a way where there is still an online anime fandom but anime is now cultural capital and many different demographics enjoy it. Black western people for instance have an actual set of anime they can watch and see people like them now like Michiko and Hatchin and Samurai Champloon, this is of course still with the fact that Japan still eroticizes gyaru type characters (also middle and high schoolers) that originally emerged partially as a subculture to imitate Amuro Namie and as a counter movement to strict dress codes and the necessity to assimilate into a homogenous idea of the ideal student. There’s more to that and I’ve been writing forever, in the wise words of Contrapoints at this point I assume we’re all just hanging out.
Can’t wait for more amazing content, this is probably the most human content I’ve endulged in. Aka a lot of feelings, thank you for sharing your experiences. This is more than entertainment
I've started watching your videos recently, and I had no idea you listened to vocaloid; I just thought "Oh, what a pleasant surprise, I wonder what this video could be about?" as it popped up in my recommended. I was already binging your video essays, so I already knew this was gonna be a journey for me since vocaloid always had a tendency to make me cry.
This video hit me like a bat to the face; I haven't been filled with so many old memories in so long. It reminded me of when I would sit in my room, and draw miku in her Tricolore Airline outfit or gumi in her alice in wonderland style dress from Eat Me. This video reminded me that, I did all of those things to enjoy myself. I did it for a sheer passion and love for it, and because I wanted a way to say thank you or find people who felt the same way. I pushed aside others just to be able to hang a poster or two and put figurines on my shelves, because I loved Miku ever since I even knew what a phone was.
I always indulged in things such as vocaloid and various other fandoms that told me that "Who cares if you're judged? If you'll fail? Do it because you love it!" and I have been trying to live my life with that message. But as I moved on, I learned more about myself, my ADHD, and the anxiety of isolating myself for something I didn't even care about anymore. I told myself I regretted being so weird when I first moved to my new school and talking all about miku.
This anxiety built up all the way to high school, where I now stand. (I know Im not very old haha) Right as I was watching this video, I was doing the one thing I currently hated the most; drawing. I needed it for a project; of course I had to. And earlier in the same day I lost every single drawing I did back in my vocaloid times just because my parents reset my data and forced me to delete and reinstall the app. I didn't even miss those drawings, I hated how they looked anyways. But after watching this video, seeing the value I put into each of those drawings, I can't help but miss them. I can't even describe how typing this out is slowly breaking my heart. It reminded me of their value, how much time and effort I put into not only my vocaloid drawings, but everything beyond that. How my passion for video games, anime, and even art itself were being expressed through every single one of those drawings I half-assed at the time.
But even if I can't look behind me anymore, I'm gonna try to look forward. I may not have my representation and progress of that love anymore, and of one of my biggest passions, but I still have it inside me. Today I was reminded of what I"m capable of doing if it's for something I love, and I will continue to grow just to pursue this passion.
You didn't have to make this video, especially when you had no idea if anyone at all was going to view it. I can't help but go through some of my older playlists now just to relisten to some of the classics as well. Thank you for reaching out and connecting with me.
I know this video will soon be 3 years old soon but just. Goddamn to say this video hit fucking hard and closely is such a huge understatement. I’m still in the start of high school so i was quite late compared to most of the party and there was probably a lot of stuff that changed from then and now but half of the cycle and experience of yours that you described, and likely similar to also many others reminded me a lot of mine. I was also on the internet way wayyy younger then i should have ever been (luckily i don’t have that many deep traumas related to vocaloid, and im sorry to any fucked up shit you had to witness.) and i heard about Miku before, but what made me really fall in love with it was the specific day i first found rolling girl. As silly as it sounds, around in 3rd grade was probably one of the hardest time of my life. I have been having to take medicines for anxiety and depression and going to serious therapy since around i was 7, which i feel like says already quite a lot. That plus other odd mannerisms of mine that i still have to figure out in the future put me trough such a hard time besides them just being a part of me, being in i was in a school that only saw value in brain smarts and overworked and studied their students as young as elementary to death and in which for the person i was and all my mental health issues was treated like some monster and parasite by the school staff,my peers and basically everything. But as one day as i was going on youtube, some odd song in japanese that was using the familiar blue haired girl popped up in which i clicked and… words can’t really describe at all the magical feeling i had the second those piano notes in the start hit. It didn’t even had the lyrics which i would still not understand the most when i first looked them up but i felt seen. I felt heard. All of what that robotic anime girl’s voice was shouting was just what i felt. And from there i was OBSESSED. Like stated, i was a “weird” little kid and art, be it music, animation etc was my biggest passion and just one of the things in the entire universe i value and enjoy the most and when i went to start diving and search out of more curiosity about that teal pony tailed girl and what her and all the other silly characters that sang with her really were i was oh so mesmerized and captivated by the fact these wacky voices and characters were just this ultimate tool of art that just. connected others and made making truly wonderful peaces of art this personal and easy (((for the most part))) and since then just… Yeah i dont have words to describe the ride that was falling into this world like you did. And like you i also never and still don’t get the appeal or am able to properly follow and have this much dedications to bands or artist with the exception of vocaloid producers and groups i still can’t really reason why. I have liked vocaloid a lot less before and my current experience wasn’t as lively as it was with my first encounters with it on late childhood to early pre teens but goooodd i still love it to death. Idk if im ever going to a Miku/Vocaloid expo or concert as in i live in latin america which for some odd reason still never had a SINGLE one of those in any of it’s country for some reason so i don’t know how close of a possibility there is for it to be somewhere near me but with the possibility of me staying to study in a place in the west in a near future and my mom seeing more miku stuff in a regular old ass clothing store we have in my city, i have hopes. And either way when it comes i feel like i’ll just cry tears of joys and it is still one of my biggest dreams. I can’t imagine me, my life, my passions and the person i am without vocaloid as it’s just that important to me. Thank you so much and rest in the most peace possible wowaka and thank you for properly introducing me to this world and just. making my life better and introducing what i had myself escape into in some of the most harsh moments of my life.
This is wayyyy too long of a comment that probably isn’t even well structured but i came into this channel because of higurashi stuff i found and really like but yeah just so. Delighted by this video and reminder of all the similar experiences of lifes changed for the better or worse by vocaloid like mine. Stay safe and i loved this video
Thank you so much for your comment and really hope you get to go to a concert one day!!
This is a really exceptional retrospective. The experiences you shared about growing up within the Vocaloid community feel parallel to my own in the online j-rock scene and text-based role playing forums of the early 2000s. Thank you for making this video. It's made me feel seen in a way I didn't think was possible.
This video resonated with me so much! With that shot in the dark feeling of creating something against all odds. and The want to connect to other people with shared passions. This is such a heartfelt video and i’m so glad I watched it. It makes me want to keep creating, to keep looking for connection and to keep going. Thank you!
I teared up. At times it felt like you were saying everything I wish I could say about this, too. Thank you for making this video and sharing your story. :)
Happy birthday to you!!! I wish you all the best! May your desires come true!
Personally, when it comes to music (in general) I don't know too much, so this was kinda my introduction to Vocaloid. It was great hearing you talking about it, about your past and about what it means to you! Great video!
Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed it!
The way you talk about Vocaloid reminds me of how the Sonic the Hedgehog series/fandom. It and this girl back in 7th grade is what got me started drawing, making characters, and into internet culture. I'm not really into the series anymore and it's embarrassing looking back on not only my art but the way I talked, but I wouldn't change it for the world.
You are making such great videos ! Thank you for sharing your experiences with higurashi and vocaloid also i like your voice a lot , keep up the good work you have my support ^^
This is a weird one for me, as I've never really gotten into Vocaloid. And yet, a lot of the things you discussed here mirrored my own experiences in other places. So for something that I clicked out of curiousity about how someone viewed Vocaloid, this hit surprisngly deep. Also, major props to you for being so open about something that feels so personal.
P.S. I hope you have a good Christmas, despite how poorly the government has handled everything.
This really resonated with me. Thank you for making this.
Kinda wanted to cry in the end. This was a really beautiful video
just found your channel and your videos are simply amazing :DD
I cried . was goign to make al long comment but it seems I cant
great great video! 💛
vocaloid will always be a part of me no matter how much or how few i'll listen to it in the future. even if it's just on my own, without connections, maybe against the purpose of it.. it's just how it is. to me it's all about the emotions it evoked, made me feel *something* in this desert like existence✌️
This is one of the most relatable videos ever, I entered the Fandom just before it's dying days, and I stepped away after I mentally couldn't, now I'm growing more comfortable with it again.
tghnks for this
I like your video taught me a lot about history of vocaloid I wish miku was real her songs forever changed my life and how I view things interpret feelings and taught me a new language that I’ve always wanted to know thank you miku sama永遠に感謝しています I hope to attend a concert in my life I genuinely think I have a good chance of passing out
This channel is really underrated
What people’s favorite vocaloid songs say about them, my old favorites was lost ones weeping and rolling girl
im actually crying rn
hurts just a bit
Yoo why am I'm i really crying
... What are five good tunes from Vocaloid that I should check out?
You did an amazing job. The link in the description thing is easier in the android version of Studio, but even then the glitches, gods they suck. I'm an indie Engloid Producer, and not being able to link to the nico nico playlist I put my project, #TheMultiSphereProject, on is, literally, the worst.
This may be random but what do you think about higurashi new?
Gonna go listen to Two Faced Lovers.
BESS SONOZAKI PATRON SAINT OF WEEABOOS
What is the song at 32:00? I've heard it before but sadly forgot it's name.
Unknown Mother Goose by wowaka!
@@_bess Thank you! As a fan of both higurashi and vocaloid I've been following your videos since last year. Keep up the good work and remember to have fun and relax when you can! I really appreciate the content you make.
I know this is off topic, but what do ya think of the new higurashi anime so far?
If anyone complains about your monotone narration ever again, please know that popular storytellers such as Paranormal Scholar exists with the same approach: ruclips.net/channel/UCfj9TK1mhbIWpcmP5rcIfYQ I feel you to be the same in soothing narration as this content creator, so please keep going and voicing your thoughts and feelings!