It feels like when you're sitting on your bed staring into space thinking about how shitty your life is, then the reality of it all hits you and you start screaming and sobbing.
It was really tough when my parents divorced and holidays are a lot different now. Its been four year since my parents split. I was sixteen at the time. I tried to talk to my friend about how the divorce is still affecting me, and he told me to get over it because it happened four years ago. My dad is happy with his new fiancé, but it seems like I'm still the only one from my old family that is still being affected by it. Thanks for taking the time to read this if you made it this far
My parents separated around 2001. It was a very messy ordeal. I can say I've mostly been able to get past it, but it still stings sometimes. Even after becoming my own man, after leaving the nest, after fostering a healthy relationship with my dad later on, even after my dad passed away last year... it still stings, mostly due to the awful memories behind it. If you still haven't fully gotten over it, I understand.
My parents divorced when I was 12 (I'm 14 now) and It was was really messy and terrible for years before the divorce and then no one ever mentioned it again and I guess I can really relate to this is what Im saying. . . ..
Trauma for life. Tried to raise my kids so they didn't have to go thru what we kids did... And no matter how hard I tried to make their lives better.. I'm somehow repeating the cycle and showed weakness I didn't know I had. My previous self would of never put up with the shit that I have continuously put up with now. Shame on me for not being that strong tough gal. I cannot believe that it happened while I was going thru life day to day. Like I was living in denial that I took had a failed marriage. All I wanted in life was to raise my kids and show them as much in life as I could and give them a happy childhood without the fear I grew up with . And here I sit... Not changing anything at all.
+Troy Carpenter I'm a 23 year old parent of an "accident" 5 year old child. I say "accident" because at the time, it's what it seemed like. But I fell in love with this child. he became my world. The only thing that came between him and me, is his little (now 2 year old) brother. Now, BOTH of them are my world. I left everything- my well paying job, my community (that looked down on teenage parents),my friends, my family, my dreams to make sure he had (and now, they) had an incredible life. Their mother and I broke up a few months ago... Yet we both still live in the house that we bought together, we never fight in front of (or even in the vicinity of them)... Sure, we fake smiles, but when you're little, you need both of your parents. You really do. I was lucky enough to have both of mine throughout my whole life (sure there was plenty of fighting... But they "stayed together for the kids". They have been together for over 35 years now and are the happiest couple I've ever seen. I wish you would stop and appreciate that your parents went through hell to "stay together for the kids", and I mean that honestly, from both sides, the parent and the kid. Appreciate it.
I remember being a kid and listening to this and wishing that my mom and dad would stop fighting now that I'm grown and have a family of my own I never dreamed in a million years I'd be in the same type of situation
This is very sad indeed, but unfortunately history repeats itself. We are doomed to make the same mistakes as our parents IF WE DO NOT LEARN from it. Personally, my parents have served as a perfect example of WHAT NOT TO DO in my own marriage. Honestly, they weren't bad people and it's really even more 1-sided as my dad just left. My mom really had no choice and was forced to raise us as a single mother crying herself to sleep every night (kids don't forget that either). I'm truly sorry to hear this. One piece of advise I can give to you: through it all but especially in the bad times just simply remember why you did it in the first place. Remember why you agreed to take a vow publicly before God and man as witnesses - and for the love of God if you have children stay together for the kids. (even if just until they move out, get married and have kids of their own). As someone who has been through this please heed my warning: Your kids will eventually forgive and move on with their own lives but I promise they will never truly forgive you (or your spouse) for destroying their family.
Graduating class of '04.... I just said the same thing.. when I listened to this in junior High i connected with the lyrics.. "20 years now gone" I have my own family with a 5 year old son and.... WTF It hits me like a brick to the face.
Why must history repeat itself? 😭 Grew up hearing my parents argue, now my poor kids are going through it. I hate it 😔 but here I an, still fighting for my marriage
To my mom, who thought that staying would help us grow. To my father, for never changing and blaming his faults on us. To my brother, who got out before it was really bad. And to me, cause I made it, broken but made it.
I'm feeling the same way but I'm the brother and I just missed getting out before it's bad by a few years and I'm just longing for the day it can all end or the day i can leave it behind and live somewhere far away.
so true - and they never will. Years later my mother's parents ended a 45yr marriage by separating and she said to me 'well my parents split as well so I understand', but the sad fact of the matter is she was already grown up with her own family. She was already stable in her world and secure in her life. She'll never know what it feel like and neither will my dad.
and to work at resolving the issues. My husband and I have been to therapy 3-4 times in our 30 year marriage because our marriage and our kids were that important to us.
this band quite literally saved my life , I grew up thru the 90s and always had the privlegde of chillin with the older kids and they loved this stuff and it rubbed off...
My brother showed me this song when I was 12 as our parents were getting divorced, I'm so glad to have him by my side, we both like to communicate with music and show our emotions with music..
Jesus, I feel like crap right now, my family is everything i got and now its falling in to pieces, i love blink 182, i feel the way the song describes. I mean nothing without my family 😭
This is not true at all. We can find meaning and value outside of our families. Furthermore, biology isn't everything. We can have many different families
Single Dad of an 11 year old boy, a 9 year old girl, and an 8 year old boy. I was granted full custody 7 years ago after a divorce. Trust me things get better. Everyone heals after time. This song equals the pain my children experienced. It's a constant move towards healing. It doesn't happen over night. It takes time.
I think allot of us come here for the same reason. We made it guys. I’m proud of all of you. Through all of the trials and sleepless nights. We’ve always been together through music without even knowing it. Keep on keepin on brothers and sisters.
Growing up I hated my parents together too much fighting and abuse went on .... my dad ended up leaving and I saw my mom much happier and healthier 😊 although I love both my parents sometimes going seperate ways is the best thing to do "for the kids"
I grew up with my parents divorced my mom and dad were never together they both suffered addiction and i was back and forth with living with before i was removed and put into foster care growing up when i hit my teen years and was in middle school i had found out one day in the middle of class that my mom was shot in the back of the neck and that pretty much crushed me as a kid did I mention that she survived and is walking and talking to this day and thats truly a miracle to me and as the years when on she finally was able to get sober and gain full custody of me back to pull me out of foster care and here i am pushing on everyday hoping to help other snd to let them know that even when the world can be cruel we have to be strong and push on and I’m proud to see that no matter how hard things get were still here
Splitting up was the best decision my parents ever made. The fights, the drama, the long car rides to grandma's just to get away. They were better friends than they ever were anything else. It took them years to finally find a happy place... away from each other. It felt food to see them happy with someone else, even if thry weren't together. Everyone deserves to find that happiness. My childhood home was a toxic place.
We stayed together for the kids and now we actually like each other. Occasionally there is a happy ending. By the way we saw this band on the Cheshire Cat tour.
My parents stayed together for me but I honestly don't know what's worse. All my mom can talk about is how once I turn 18 she's divorcing my dad and so on. Both my parents love me but sadly they don't love each other.
Man, she never should've told you that. She never should have instilled ill-feelings of bitterness in you about your dad. That is totally wrong. That's like saying 'wow, I hate your wife so much. If she was my wife I'd probably kill myself, but hey best of luck in your marriage I'm sure you'll be happy'. And this is your dad. Harsh bro.
I have to say when I was in 6th grade and my thoughts at the time had been very similar to this song, but looking back to them I see how wrong I was the divorce was the best thing to happen out of the time with my dad having cancer and going bankrupt. Point is sometimes we get angry at things that turn out to be blessings in the future but if anyone else feels this way just keep a positive outlook. ;)
Thank you so much this comment just hit me. My parents are divorced and I didnt get to see my dad for 3 yrs. I cried every night. I'm only in 6th grade and then heard this song and died inside.
Lauren Wood But please don't let it instill trust issues I'm 16 and it's a big issue in my life when I try and create relationships just don't let it hold you back.
You have a point. I'm wouldn't be the same man today, had I been raised by my biological father which really turned out to be a good thing; however at the time the feelings of hurt and even rejection by your parents - the people who are supposed to love you, keep you safe and protect you is too overwhelming for a child. I was only 4yr old & my sister 6. It's not right - they lyrics are dead on. It's not right!
This song is so relatable. My parents were married for 20 years when they decided to get divorced. Though my mother came back after a few months of living with another man. Just to use my dad. Then she broke up with him again. Then my dad died a few months later. Now the life she's living isn't going like she planned. But that's everybody am I right lol
Wow! so harsh. Sounds like your mom was still in the immature days of high school and playing the field. My parents divorced after just 13.5yrs of marriage. Totally destroyed our childhood (mine and my older sister). It's such a traumatic experience and the parents don't even realize what it does to the kids. I love the lyrics of this song so much though; so much passion in the words "We get along, so why can't they?" it's sad and totally unfair. You made a commitment, you took vows, you promised; but your words are useless and meaningless.
Heard this song a million times, it released when I was 21. Back then it was just a catchy song with no meaning. Now my eyes tear up right away. My parents were happily married. But now at 41, my 19 year marriage is almost final and I feel absolutely horrible for the pain my 10 year old girls go through. They break down and cry. They can’t understand. They won’t until they have their own relationships. Even then it will sting. During mandatory parenting class the state makes you take when you divorce, they showed kid interviews of the impact. It’s so sad. Just like the comments here. They showed research that concluded for many, it’s the single biggest/worst thing to happen to someone in a lifetime. Even if things turn out for the better. There’s still an underlying sting there. I filed and moved out 5 months ago and I can see in my 10 year old kids this hurts and it hurts deeply. I hate that it didn’t workout. Why does the best decision I’ve ever made feel so good yet hurt so bad? I hate it for them. But I couldn’t stay with their mom. I hope they can understand one day.
Dude, this is so rough, none of us imagined nor desired this for ourselves. I guess one bursts in tears when you know you're not perfect but you've done your part and these are the end results. Wife left after 14 years of marriage and 4 children... it is tough as a father to move on
I always come back here and remember when me and my older brother were head banging and yelling these lyrics side by side just letting out so much shit about our parents divorce. Without discussion we put this on and felt better and knew how to scream it!!!! Love you T-Bone
I was kinder when my daddy and mommy broke up and here I am listening to this song, I am now grade 9 and the scene is like yesterday, and the pain is still fresh:((
I’m grateful that my parents finally divorced three years ago... there was too much arguing and problems in the house. I’m glad that day happened and that my mom finally got the courage to leave a second time, and for good this time. I helped her pack up my sisters things and left for a shelter. Now, I am living with my mother, have a beautiful baby sister and don’t have to watch my mom and sisters cry anymore.
Its 2019. Being 20. And my parents are still the same. Amazing they do "stay together for the kids" . But at this point, just go seperate now. Too much to hear on a daily basis
My mom used to play blink-182 in the car..I never understood the lyrics since I didn't really care to think my dad didn't care for us that's why we had our stepdad. But with what I now know that she has gone through with her parents and what I've gone through..it hits different, man
It’s difficult for humans to overcome human nature which includes: being self-centered, totally unaware of blind spots which EVERYONE has, punishing the other person, selfishness, laziness, lack of accountability, defensiveness, and doing a whole lot of taking a not much giving. Good luck with all that humans!
To my father that was NEVER there. Chose drugs & died at 35. To my mother that lied to me for years & made me believe he was still alive. Sweeping everything under the carpet. Therapy is expensive. She still to this day buries her head in the sand. I am now 26 & have nothing to thank them for.
I am 26 and have been through a lot of what the people commenting have. I just want to say it may hurt now but it will get better. I won't say it's as easy as people in your lives make it seem, you can just "get over it." Glad I'm listening to this as a memory and not going through it anymore. I just feel bad for a lot of people growing up feeling the same way I did. Your heroes turning to your greatest villains...I wish you all the best.
This song hits me because I kind of wish my parents had split up when I was a kid. The fights, the arguing, the resentment towards each other; a divorce would have hurt but I don’t think it would have been any worse than what they often were. They’re still together and they still seem miserable but I feel like they just don’t split because they want to see it through to its end.
I feel you. My parents finally filed for divorce in my late 20s. Even though I wished it would happen almost every day of my childhood it still hurt. Nobody dreams of their family breaking up unless it’s for the better.
@@xxladybug94going through this now, in my late 20s and they're finally getting divorced. I wish I could be happy but all I feel is anger and hurt that it didn't happen sooner, before the damage was done.
I'm just ranting. My mom and dad split up when I was too young to remember, and recently like 2 years ago they tried to 'make it work' but her alcoholism ruined it for the second time. It was hard. But I got over it, I liked them better apart. Until Daddy died from late diagnosed lung cancer. Mom has had a boyfriend for nearly 3 years and she took my dad's death the absoloute worst, but her and her boyfriend fight all the time, non stop practically, It was unbelievably hard dealing with the death of your favorite person in the world only to deal with the utter bullshit the adults who are supposed to care for you put you through. Why they try to make it work? For me and my sister, and we've grown extremely close to his daughter, only a year younger than I. In addition to that, I'm not ready to flip my life upside down and move. I can't right now. They fight and the next day, sometimes even minutes after, it's all fake smiles and pretending like the door to their room isn't broken. I feel words foam up towards my mouth ready to attack anyone and anything causing the anger. I find them slipping more and more, I don't have to deal with their bullshit, my dad's dead, I gotta helo my sisters when they fight. They don't deserve to hear it. None of us do. If I can be happy and calm why can't they? This song- it just describes everything. I remember last Christmas even, when they fought the WHOLE week before christmas, especially christmas eve when he almost left with his daughter. Then on Christmas, they were up early, laughing and talking, smiling and drinking coffee, offering US coffee, which they rarely did. They are so fucking selfish it's unbelievable. I get that arguments happen, but Jesus fucking Christ why do they have to be so loud and vicous, and scary?
When I was in high school (performing arts high school) this was the first song I played on stage for a showcase. I was supposed to be rhythm but the lead got suspended a week before the showcase and I remember I was terrified because I didn’t think I was gonna do well. I messed up a couple times but I got through it and to this day this song gives me chills
When parents weren't divorced,..but after listening to this songs all those kids especially whose parents were divorced got some motivation or courage to live on their lives. Thanks to Blink182
Lived this as child, and now my kids are living it. I’m breaking this fing cycle. I was in an abusive alcoholic household, my husband is a narcissist and I just can’t live like this anymore. He’s never wrong. He’s never sorry. He will never acknowledge the pain he’s caused me and our kids.
it's hard to wake up, when the shades have been pulled shut This house is haunted, it's so pathetic, it makes no sense at all I'm ripe with things to say, the words rot and fall away What stupid poem could fix this home, I'd read it every day So here's your holiday, hope you enjoy it this time, you gave it all away it was mine, so when you're dead and gone will you remember this night, twenty years now lost, it's not right. Their anger hurts my ears, been running strong for seven years Rather than fix the problems, they never solve them, it makes no sense at all I see them everyday, we get along so why can't they? If this is what he wants, and it's what she wants, then why is there so much pain? So here's your holiday, hope you enjoy it this time, you gave it all away. it was mine, so when you're dead and gone will you remember this night, twenty years now lost, it's not right. So here's your holiday, hope you enjoy it this time, you gave it all away. It was mine, so when you're dead and gone, will you remember this night, twenty years now lost? it's not right it's not right it's not right it's not right
My parents divorced right around the time after i graduated high-school. It was a really challenging time i still havent fully processed. I have a lot of resentment. And dont really have a relationship with either of my parents. I wish i had supportive parent's and wish i felt like theyd cared about my future. Felt like they only cared about hating eachother and how miserable they were
Holidays aren't normal. I don't even go. My mom's side still tried to include my dad at their holidays which I found to be weird and disrespectful to my mom. Especially when she wanted to attend but couldn't due to work. I don't know how to pretend to be happy at family functions when I don't feel like I have a family. Who am I representing? Just myself? I felt lost around extended family without an immediate family
i think that is better stay separated if the situation is too bad. by my experience, i know that is too sad withstand fights, and screams by your parents.
This is essentially the problem though. Parents should quite literally NEVER fight in front of their kids. Yes, easier said then done I get it, but the point remains. How parents treat each other is how kids learn to treat others in their lives. It's a practice that is learned directly from our role models. Times get hard and things happen, but fighting in front of your children, having them hear your screams and inner-most thoughts through a heated argument? Trying to teach them to love each other and live in harmony while shaming and belittling their beloved spouses - and even talking bad about each other to their kids behind the back of their spouses - yeah it's not right!
There's too many parents that love themselves more than their spouse or their children. If they can stop being full of themselves and drop their pride and be decent people, they can make it work. Even then, if it cannot work, they should nut stay together, but no parent should abandon their child. Two members of Blink went through that. On the other hand, there are parents who settle on joint custody and are more brutal and hateful and manipulative than any parent who stays married to someone they don't love.
Man this song hits so hard. I'm a grown up now with a family of my own and I remember breaking the lame family portrait in my childhood home when my dad left and I was alone. Life went sideways and everything got worse for a long time but it is good now without them.
To my mom, who thought we could all grow together. To my dad, who got arrested for beating up someone he thought was his friend 4 years later he is now mentally deranged. To my brother, who was traumatized after our parents divorced and is going to be heading to Japan after college to become an English teacher. And, to me, I will follow my dreams of becoming both a musician and filmmaker to leave my hometown behind. Edit: sorry I spelt divorced wrong 😬
My parents divorced when I was 6, for 4 years I didn’t really understand what was going on or why, they weren’t together. I was just told we’re gonna stay here for a little bit, or he had to go somewhere. The years of not knowing what was happening built up. Eventually when I figured out what was really happening I really hurt, but I still had questions. Over the years I would just assume the reason why they divorced. I never wanted to ask because I was scared I would find out a scary truth, I also thought it might have been my fault. It hurt me for so long, one day I was sitting in my bed, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I finally built up the courage to ask the real reason. My mom told me that they had argued and fault sometimes, but the main reason the split is because they didn’t want me to grow up in a family where there was fighting. They figured it would cause problems later in my life. Still to this day I find out more and more reason that I didn’t know about. I am now at peace with the divorce, and both my parents are at a stable situation. But I’m glad my parents thought about my future, and that it what made their decision.
I know this one is about divorce but I always thought differently when I first heard this, made me think about my parents and how they treat each other despite claiming that they love one another, Which is why I think it’s better to not stay just for the kids, because broken relationships can make a home hell, it’s not love to stay just for the kids or home in a toxic relationship like that, my mom and dad are a perfect example of this, Divorce is not always the end of something good, it can also be the start of something better, No judgement to anyone effected by divorce, know your not alone but also not everyone has the same situation as you and that’s fine, hope your doing well to anyone affected by divorce or toxic parents.
Nearly impossible to stay together forever in 2019 with all this bullshit coming in between us, all of this social media garbage. Greed, lust and narcissism. It’s a chaotic place to live. Only thing to do is move forward with positive thinking, overcome our fears and accept change.
I never listened to pop punk or music in general when I was younger and Blink was big. Maybe if they were on the radio or a movie soundtrack and I would never recognize them. But I listened to Dookie from Green Day for the first time last year and now listening to this at 24 years old, the 13 year old kid I was when my parents split needed this. Thanks Blink-182.
A lot of people seem to miss the point of the song. It's not saying "you should stay with someone you don't love any more and are fighting with for the sake of your kids." It's saying the exact OPPOSITE! DON'T stay in a loveless relationship full of fighting and resentment, because it will only make it harder for the kids to see their parents fighting all the time yet claiming they love each other. You need to be honest with your kids about how relationships sometimes end, or you're setting them up to have a very unhealthy idea of how relationships work.
You can call me a liar all you want but Im in 6th grade at the moment and I am obsessed with blink 182. My parents are divorced and I have three dads. This song hits me so hard the first time I heard it I cried. Blink is the best punk band I have ever heard I just recently discovered them again after a bit. And I finally got see them live in usana in salt lake city! It was raining but oh well. My ears also scarred for life. Ive heard the song before, but they played shit piss live.
Parents divorced 20 years ago, and I didn't really take to the new step mom until recently. Crushed in a motorcycle collision, I learned about how my life was tilted at 10 years old when laid up in the intensive care unit. This song speaks volumes to me, because my whole life with my siblings after the divorce was struggles, poverty and conflict. Learning about all of this while dealing with healing is rough, man.
To my Parents, i didn't ask for anything from both of you. I just want to live my life by my own. Enough for tried to keep holding everything together by faking our feelings. cause we now we were not good at this "family" game. Live your life to, just forget the pain. Be happy on your own way, and i'll be too.
The fact that the song is so soft in Mark's part but when it enters Tom's part it goes so wild with that guitar break and his voice is just so iconic
exactly this
It feels like when you're sitting on your bed staring into space thinking about how shitty your life is, then the reality of it all hits you and you start screaming and sobbing.
You got it
It was really tough when my parents divorced and holidays are a lot different now. Its been four year since my parents split. I was sixteen at the time. I tried to talk to my friend about how the divorce is still affecting me, and he told me to get over it because it happened four years ago. My dad is happy with his new fiancé, but it seems like I'm still the only one from my old family that is still being affected by it. Thanks for taking the time to read this if you made it this far
Life gets better trust me I seen my parents divorce and eent thru one and it killed me but pushed forward and things are alright...............
Reading this from Philippines, I hope that you are better now. 🙏
#Ginger Binger
You'll be alright
My parents separated around 2001. It was a very messy ordeal. I can say I've mostly been able to get past it, but it still stings sometimes. Even after becoming my own man, after leaving the nest, after fostering a healthy relationship with my dad later on, even after my dad passed away last year... it still stings, mostly due to the awful memories behind it.
If you still haven't fully gotten over it, I understand.
My parents divorced when I was 12 (I'm 14 now) and It was was really messy and terrible for years before the divorce and then no one ever mentioned it again and I guess I can really relate to this is what Im saying. . . ..
To all the kids from broken homes, I hope life got better, grew up to have your own beautiful family, turn pain into love
Amen.
I tried and my homes becoming broke too. I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up
@@joshghost661Hugs
Trauma for life. Tried to raise my kids so they didn't have to go thru what we kids did... And no matter how hard I tried to make their lives better.. I'm somehow repeating the cycle and showed weakness I didn't know I had. My previous self would of never put up with the shit that I have continuously put up with now. Shame on me for not being that strong tough gal. I cannot believe that it happened while I was going thru life day to day. Like I was living in denial that I took had a failed marriage. All I wanted in life was to raise my kids and show them as much in life as I could and give them a happy childhood without the fear I grew up with . And here I sit... Not changing anything at all.
@@okjayoni283 We'll never be the parents our kids deserve. All we can do is to try our best to come close.
To my parents who stayed together for the house and us. To the screaming matches and pan throwing nights and the fake smiles of our vacation photos.
My same situation..;-;
Haaaa lol
+Troy Carpenter
I'm a 23 year old parent of an "accident" 5 year old child. I say "accident" because at the time, it's what it seemed like. But I fell in love with this child. he became my world. The only thing that came between him and me, is his little (now 2 year old) brother. Now, BOTH of them are my world. I left everything- my well paying job, my community (that looked down on teenage parents),my friends, my family, my dreams to make sure he had (and now, they) had an incredible life. Their mother and I broke up a few months ago... Yet we both still live in the house that we bought together, we never fight in front of (or even in the vicinity of them)... Sure, we fake smiles, but when you're little, you need both of your parents. You really do. I was lucky enough to have both of mine throughout my whole life (sure there was plenty of fighting... But they "stayed together for the kids". They have been together for over 35 years now and are the happiest couple I've ever seen. I wish you would stop and appreciate that your parents went through hell to "stay together for the kids", and I mean that honestly, from both sides, the parent and the kid. Appreciate it.
+Brent Kennedy Preach dude, because life is way too short.
to all the times the parents told they kids they loved each other, and the kid knew they lied
I remember being a kid and listening to this and wishing that my mom and dad would stop fighting now that I'm grown and have a family of my own I never dreamed in a million years I'd be in the same type of situation
Rock Smith that sucks man
This is very sad indeed, but unfortunately history repeats itself. We are doomed to make the same mistakes as our parents IF WE DO NOT LEARN from it. Personally, my parents have served as a perfect example of WHAT NOT TO DO in my own marriage. Honestly, they weren't bad people and it's really even more 1-sided as my dad just left. My mom really had no choice and was forced to raise us as a single mother crying herself to sleep every night (kids don't forget that either).
I'm truly sorry to hear this. One piece of advise I can give to you: through it all but especially in the bad times just simply remember why you did it in the first place. Remember why you agreed to take a vow publicly before God and man as witnesses - and for the love of God if you have children stay together for the kids. (even if just until they move out, get married and have kids of their own). As someone who has been through this please heed my warning: Your kids will eventually forgive and move on with their own lives but I promise they will never truly forgive you (or your spouse) for destroying their family.
Graduating class of '04.... I just said the same thing.. when I listened to this in junior High i connected with the lyrics.. "20 years now gone" I have my own family with a 5 year old son and.... WTF It hits me like a brick to the face.
Why must history repeat itself? 😭
Grew up hearing my parents argue, now my poor kids are going through it. I hate it 😔 but here I an, still fighting for my marriage
right in the feelings
To my mom, who thought that staying would help us grow.
To my father, for never changing and blaming his faults on us.
To my brother, who got out before it was really bad.
And to me, cause I made it, broken but made it.
I know your feeling bro.
To my son: I know it's been hard but you're one tough ol' bird.
I know that feeling. It fucking sucks..😔
I feel you
I'm feeling the same way but I'm the brother and I just missed getting out before it's bad by a few years and I'm just longing for the day it can all end or the day i can leave it behind and live somewhere far away.
Stay together for the fans
stop this :(
indirect to mcr
satan af DONT, JUST DONT.
UR KILLING ME LEAVE ME ALONBE
90sgreenday lol mcr is breaking up?? About time!
jarrett davis THEY BROKE UP IN 2013................................
Seriously this song hits me so hard, it's like our parents think about negative things to each other but yet they don't know how we feel about it.
so true - and they never will. Years later my mother's parents ended a 45yr marriage by separating and she said to me 'well my parents split as well so I understand', but the sad fact of the matter is she was already grown up with her own family. She was already stable in her world and secure in her life. She'll never know what it feel like and neither will my dad.
"is a stupid poem could fix this home, I'd read it everyday"
This song is a constant reminder for me to keep together for my 2 yo daughter. No kids should suffer for something they don't understand.
and to work at resolving the issues. My husband and I have been to therapy 3-4 times in our 30 year marriage because our marriage and our kids were that important to us.
this band quite literally saved my life , I grew up thru the 90s and always had the privlegde of chillin with the older kids and they loved this stuff and it rubbed off...
I literally just clicked on this video listening to other music and I just bursted into tears because everything hurts and this song said it all.
Sami y?
me too
Sometimes we need the pain to lead us to the light.
@@klob85 ratio
@@Kingler03 This ain't twitter you basement dweller he said something meaningful and you think your funny by saying some shi out of a math book
To all the people both young and old who have had to or are going through this pain. My heart goes out to you all
Thank you, Pumpkin Prince.
I love this band... always will.
It’s not just staying together for the kids it’s making your marriage work for the kids. Big difference.
Totally agree. Me and my wife had to figure out the difference between this
My brother showed me this song when I was 12 as our parents were getting divorced, I'm so glad to have him by my side, we both like to communicate with music and show our emotions with music..
Jesus, I feel like crap right now, my family is everything i got and now its falling in to pieces, i love blink 182, i feel the way the song describes. I mean nothing without my family 😭
This is simple plan...omg.
Be thankful for what you have ok count your blessings no one has it easy
This is not true at all. We can find meaning and value outside of our families. Furthermore, biology isn't everything. We can have many different families
This song. Has literally pulled the gun outta my mouth
please talk t me if you want to.
He literally didn't. You literally did.
You are important to somebody, never let go.
you literally have one of the best tastes of music ever. I have loved alll of these songs forever
I always imagine a huge middle finger being displayed at the line "So here's your holiday!"
perfect!
The first time I heard this song I thought it said "So here's your holiday... Fuck you"
Seth Schuler I also thought that until I watched this video
Single Dad of an 11 year old boy, a 9 year old girl, and an 8 year old boy. I was granted full custody 7 years ago after a divorce. Trust me things get better. Everyone heals after time. This song equals the pain my children experienced. It's a constant move towards healing. It doesn't happen over night. It takes time.
I am thankful for this song. Even when times with my husband get tough we owe it to our children to stick it out.
I think allot of us come here for the same reason. We made it guys. I’m proud of all of you. Through all of the trials and sleepless nights. We’ve always been together through music without even knowing it. Keep on keepin on brothers and sisters.
Hell yeah. Let us all turn that pain into love and grow from it 🙏
Growing up I hated my parents together too much fighting and abuse went on .... my dad ended up leaving and I saw my mom much happier and healthier 😊 although I love both my parents sometimes going seperate ways is the best thing to do "for the kids"
Definitely agree
Don't stay together for the kids...We're tired of the fighting.
Adi Prasetyo we're tired of all the pain
Were tired of the emotional abuse.
Rather than fix the problem, they never solve them, it makes no since at all.
Hell yeah.
But also don't settle on joint custody and force your children to hate the other parent
Man I'm thankful for my dad. He's two parents in one even when he was deployed. It sucks being a parent to not only your kids but your wife as well.
Honestly one of my all time favorite blink 182 songs
This song gives me chills
It's just so amazing
Love you Blink
This makes me want to cry.
Probably their best song they ever did that never gets talked about
god, this hit so close to home ;^;
Luna Baby not for my parents but for my daughter I cry like a infant every time i just want my family back
I grew up with my parents divorced my mom and dad were never together they both suffered addiction and i was back and forth with living with before i was removed and put into foster care growing up when i hit my teen years and was in middle school i had found out one day in the middle of class that my mom was shot in the back of the neck and that pretty much crushed me as a kid did I mention that she survived and is walking and talking to this day and thats truly a miracle to me and as the years when on she finally was able to get sober and gain full custody of me back to pull me out of foster care and here i am pushing on everyday hoping to help other snd to let them know that even when the world can be cruel we have to be strong and push on and I’m proud to see that no matter how hard things get were still here
You have to keep pushing dude. It's never easy, but you can
Man, the feels... oh the feels.
Splitting up was the best decision my parents ever made. The fights, the drama, the long car rides to grandma's just to get away. They were better friends than they ever were anything else. It took them years to finally find a happy place... away from each other. It felt food to see them happy with someone else, even if thry weren't together. Everyone deserves to find that happiness. My childhood home was a toxic place.
We stayed together for the kids and now we actually like each other. Occasionally there is a happy ending. By the way we saw this band on the Cheshire Cat tour.
That's so awesome! So glad things worked out for you guys
blackflag firstfour the sad part many couples give up so fast and just think for themselves not the family , but I guess everybody is different.
I’m glad you all made it!
yay!
How?
This song always hits different.
I miss real music from this era.
💯
My parents stayed together for me but I honestly don't know what's worse. All my mom can talk about is how once I turn 18 she's divorcing my dad and so on. Both my parents love me but sadly they don't love each other.
Man, she never should've told you that. She never should have instilled ill-feelings of bitterness in you about your dad. That is totally wrong. That's like saying 'wow, I hate your wife so much. If she was my wife I'd probably kill myself, but hey best of luck in your marriage I'm sure you'll be happy'. And this is your dad. Harsh bro.
Stay strong
One of my biggest fears as a parent 😪
Songs hitting hard today 🤘
I have to say when I was in 6th grade and my thoughts at the time had been very similar to this song, but looking back to them I see how wrong I was the divorce was the best thing to happen out of the time with my dad having cancer and going bankrupt. Point is sometimes we get angry at things that turn out to be blessings in the future but if anyone else feels this way just keep a positive outlook. ;)
Thank you so much this comment just hit me. My parents are divorced and I didnt get to see my dad for 3 yrs. I cried every night. I'm only in 6th grade and then heard this song and died inside.
Lauren Wood But please don't let it instill trust issues I'm 16 and it's a big issue in my life when I try and create relationships just don't let it hold you back.
Thank you this is some of the best advice Ive heard in a long time
You have a point. I'm wouldn't be the same man today, had I been raised by my biological father which really turned out to be a good thing; however at the time the feelings of hurt and even rejection by your parents - the people who are supposed to love you, keep you safe and protect you is too overwhelming for a child. I was only 4yr old & my sister 6. It's not right - they lyrics are dead on. It's not right!
Sorry to read about your experience. I really trust and hope that all is better now.. God Bless!
This song describes my parents' divorce so well. I wish I found it when I was going through that.
Travis Barker’s drums and Tom’s vocals hit so damn hard!! What a classic.
and the fuckin riff too bro
two parents standing together for their kids is the most commovent and loving thing they can make
This song is so relatable. My parents were married for 20 years when they decided to get divorced. Though my mother came back after a few months of living with another man. Just to use my dad. Then she broke up with him again. Then my dad died a few months later. Now the life she's living isn't going like she planned. But that's everybody am I right lol
My parents got a divorce after 21 years of pretending to be happily married.
Wow! so harsh. Sounds like your mom was still in the immature days of high school and playing the field. My parents divorced after just 13.5yrs of marriage. Totally destroyed our childhood (mine and my older sister). It's such a traumatic experience and the parents don't even realize what it does to the kids. I love the lyrics of this song so much though; so much passion in the words "We get along, so why can't they?" it's sad and totally unfair. You made a commitment, you took vows, you promised; but your words are useless and meaningless.
Caleb Evans I'm going through this now my x
my parent arguing and fighting everyday bc of problems and money and thats right
Listening to this after a long time 😭reminiscing the old punk rock days
Heard this song a million times, it released when I was 21. Back then it was just a catchy song with no meaning. Now my eyes tear up right away.
My parents were happily married. But now at 41, my 19 year marriage is almost final and I feel absolutely horrible for the pain my 10 year old girls go through. They break down and cry. They can’t understand. They won’t until they have their own relationships. Even then it will sting.
During mandatory parenting class the state makes you take when you divorce, they showed kid interviews of the impact. It’s so sad. Just like the comments here. They showed research that concluded for many, it’s the single biggest/worst thing to happen to someone in a lifetime. Even if things turn out for the better. There’s still an underlying sting there. I filed and moved out 5 months ago and I can see in my 10 year old kids this hurts and it hurts deeply. I hate that it didn’t workout. Why does the best decision I’ve ever made feel so good yet hurt so bad? I hate it for them. But I couldn’t stay with their mom. I hope they can understand one day.
Dude, this is so rough, none of us imagined nor desired this for ourselves. I guess one bursts in tears when you know you're not perfect but you've done your part and these are the end results. Wife left after 14 years of marriage and 4 children... it is tough as a father to move on
Sending you positivity and love, my dude. You Deserve it.
Respect for you buddy, just hope that one day ur kids will understand it that it was for everyones best.
trauma is the worst thing to happen not a divorce
This thing seriously affect men.. Loving is bad
this alwasy gets me :/
if a stupid poem could fix this home, i would read it every day :/
This and Family Portrait by P!NK perfectly represents my situation
same
One of the songs I will always blare as loudly as I can
I always come back here and remember when me and my older brother were head banging and yelling these lyrics side by side just letting out so much shit about our parents divorce. Without discussion we put this on and felt better and knew how to scream it!!!! Love you T-Bone
I was kinder when my daddy and mommy broke up and here I am listening to this song, I am now grade 9 and the scene is like yesterday, and the pain is still fresh:((
I was actually happy when my parents split up. They hated each other so much. the house became so much less hostile over night.
best quality lyric video for this song I've found! thank you!
I actually cried for the first time 10 years after my parents broke up , realising how much it actually affected me mentally
Yeah it fucks with you forever... especially after you have a child of your own
So normal nowadays. 9 out of 10 friends of mine have children and are divorced.
I can;t even describe how much I love this song.
I’m grateful that my parents finally divorced three years ago... there was too much arguing and problems in the house. I’m glad that day happened and that my mom finally got the courage to leave a second time, and for good this time. I helped her pack up my sisters things and left for a shelter. Now, I am living with my mother, have a beautiful baby sister and don’t have to watch my mom and sisters cry anymore.
Its 2019. Being 20. And my parents are still the same. Amazing they do "stay together for the kids" . But at this point, just go seperate now. Too much to hear on a daily basis
Did they divorce?
Divorced parents club... Sucks being in that statistic
the problem are the kids and the psychological hurts that are forever
Oscar817 *sigh* true
Oscar817 Mine were never married, and my dad left before I was born. He lives in philly now.
fighting so much. I know they'll get divorced soon. What's worse is my mom has a broken hip.
Mine were divorced when I was 4 years old....i'm now 25 and i'm still feeling it.
It lies so deep down you can barely get to it to let it go =/
My mom used to play blink-182 in the car..I never understood the lyrics since I didn't really care to think my dad didn't care for us that's why we had our stepdad. But with what I now know that she has gone through with her parents and what I've gone through..it hits different, man
I wonder if there's an extended version of this to hear that keyboard solo fully.
Shout out to all the kids of divorced parents that come to this song to release some of the hurt ❤
It’s difficult for humans to overcome human nature which includes: being self-centered, totally unaware of blind spots which EVERYONE has, punishing the other person, selfishness, laziness, lack of accountability, defensiveness, and doing a whole lot of taking a not much giving. Good luck with all that humans!
To my father that was NEVER there. Chose drugs & died at 35.
To my mother that lied to me for years & made me believe he was still alive. Sweeping everything under the carpet.
Therapy is expensive. She still to this day buries her head in the sand. I am now 26 & have nothing to thank them for.
Aye, u gotta love that hook tho (: and the bridge ♡ shout out B182. 80s baby hear lol
Saw them live last night they played this song it was such an amazing night
I am 26 and have been through a lot of what the people commenting have. I just want to say it may hurt now but it will get better. I won't say it's as easy as people in your lives make it seem, you can just "get over it." Glad I'm listening to this as a memory and not going through it anymore. I just feel bad for a lot of people growing up feeling the same way I did. Your heroes turning to your greatest villains...I wish you all the best.
this is the best song of the world ... love you blink ♥
"If this is what he wants, and it's what she wants, then why is there so much pain?" Hits quite deep.
This song hits me because I kind of wish my parents had split up when I was a kid. The fights, the arguing, the resentment towards each other; a divorce would have hurt but I don’t think it would have been any worse than what they often were. They’re still together and they still seem miserable but I feel like they just don’t split because they want to see it through to its end.
Ur parents would be much more miserable apart.
I feel you. My parents finally filed for divorce in my late 20s. Even though I wished it would happen almost every day of my childhood it still hurt. Nobody dreams of their family breaking up unless it’s for the better.
@@xxladybug94going through this now, in my late 20s and they're finally getting divorced. I wish I could be happy but all I feel is anger and hurt that it didn't happen sooner, before the damage was done.
@@vickymeert8934 I understand completely. Sending you lots of peace and healing. It does get easier but it takes time.
I'm just ranting. My mom and dad split up when I was too young to remember, and recently like 2 years ago they tried to 'make it work' but her alcoholism ruined it for the second time. It was hard. But I got over it, I liked them better apart. Until Daddy died from late diagnosed lung cancer. Mom has had a boyfriend for nearly 3 years and she took my dad's death the absoloute worst, but her and her boyfriend fight all the time, non stop practically, It was unbelievably hard dealing with the death of your favorite person in the world only to deal with the utter bullshit the adults who are supposed to care for you put you through. Why they try to make it work? For me and my sister, and we've grown extremely close to his daughter, only a year younger than I. In addition to that, I'm not ready to flip my life upside down and move. I can't right now. They fight and the next day, sometimes even minutes after, it's all fake smiles and pretending like the door to their room isn't broken. I feel words foam up towards my mouth ready to attack anyone and anything causing the anger. I find them slipping more and more, I don't have to deal with their bullshit, my dad's dead, I gotta helo my sisters when they fight. They don't deserve to hear it. None of us do. If I can be happy and calm why can't they? This song- it just describes everything. I remember last Christmas even, when they fought the WHOLE week before christmas, especially christmas eve when he almost left with his daughter. Then on Christmas, they were up early, laughing and talking, smiling and drinking coffee, offering US coffee, which they rarely did. They are so fucking selfish it's unbelievable. I get that arguments happen, but Jesus fucking Christ why do they have to be so loud and vicous, and scary?
It’s been three years but how are things now ? Are you and your sisters ok ?
Liar
Easily one of the best songs ever
Ehh. Instrumental wise, its great. Tho, vocals are just...honestly in my opinion...horrible.
Olive Avostrine but does it work ?
When I was in high school (performing arts high school) this was the first song I played on stage for a showcase. I was supposed to be rhythm but the lead got suspended a week before the showcase and I remember I was terrified because I didn’t think I was gonna do well. I messed up a couple times but I got through it and to this day this song gives me chills
22 years together and 20 married. We stayed together for the kids. Have been divorced 1 year now.
Thanks for this song Ztk
My all time favorite Blink-182 song.
When parents weren't divorced,..but after listening to this songs all those kids especially whose parents were divorced got some motivation or courage to live on their lives. Thanks to Blink182
Seriously a great song no matter how you look at it....
Lived this as child, and now my kids are living it. I’m breaking this fing cycle.
I was in an abusive alcoholic household, my husband is a narcissist and I just can’t live like this anymore. He’s never wrong. He’s never sorry. He will never acknowledge the pain he’s caused me and our kids.
it's hard to wake up, when the shades have been pulled shut
This house is haunted, it's so pathetic, it makes no sense at all
I'm ripe with things to say, the words rot and fall away
What stupid poem could fix this home, I'd read it every day
So here's your holiday,
hope you enjoy it this time, you gave it all away
it was mine, so when you're dead and gone
will you remember this night, twenty years now lost,
it's not right.
Their anger hurts my ears, been running strong for seven years
Rather than fix the problems, they never solve them, it makes no sense at all
I see them everyday, we get along so why can't they?
If this is what he wants, and it's what she wants, then why is there so much pain?
So here's your holiday,
hope you enjoy it this time, you gave it all away.
it was mine, so when you're dead and gone
will you remember this night, twenty years now lost,
it's not right.
So here's your holiday,
hope you enjoy it this time, you gave it all away.
It was mine, so when you're dead and gone,
will you remember this night, twenty years now lost?
it's not right
it's not right
it's not right
it's not right
We can read
I would actually agree with your version more but really I'm just here for the song.
This is a sad song huh
My parents divorced right around the time after i graduated high-school. It was a really challenging time i still havent fully processed. I have a lot of resentment. And dont really have a relationship with either of my parents. I wish i had supportive parent's and wish i felt like theyd cared about my future. Felt like they only cared about hating eachother and how miserable they were
Holidays aren't normal. I don't even go. My mom's side still tried to include my dad at their holidays which I found to be weird and disrespectful to my mom. Especially when she wanted to attend but couldn't due to work. I don't know how to pretend to be happy at family functions when I don't feel like I have a family. Who am I representing? Just myself? I felt lost around extended family without an immediate family
It's sad when I look at old family photos and don't feel like I know those people
I’m sorry
i think that is better stay separated if the situation is too bad. by my experience, i know that is too sad withstand fights, and screams by your parents.
Watched my parents fight for 6 years straight, and I can agree.
This is essentially the problem though. Parents should quite literally NEVER fight in front of their kids. Yes, easier said then done I get it, but the point remains. How parents treat each other is how kids learn to treat others in their lives. It's a practice that is learned directly from our role models. Times get hard and things happen, but fighting in front of your children, having them hear your screams and inner-most thoughts through a heated argument? Trying to teach them to love each other and live in harmony while shaming and belittling their beloved spouses - and even talking bad about each other to their kids behind the back of their spouses - yeah it's not right!
There's too many parents that love themselves more than their spouse or their children. If they can stop being full of themselves and drop their pride and be decent people, they can make it work. Even then, if it cannot work, they should nut stay together, but no parent should abandon their child. Two members of Blink went through that. On the other hand, there are parents who settle on joint custody and are more brutal and hateful and manipulative than any parent who stays married to someone they don't love.
Man this song hits so hard. I'm a grown up now with a family of my own and I remember breaking the lame family portrait in my childhood home when my dad left and I was alone. Life went sideways and everything got worse for a long time but it is good now without them.
To my mom, who thought we could all grow together.
To my dad, who got arrested for beating up someone he thought was his friend 4 years later he is now mentally deranged.
To my brother, who was traumatized after our parents divorced and is going to be heading to Japan after college to become an English teacher.
And, to me, I will follow my dreams of becoming both a musician and filmmaker to leave my hometown behind.
Edit: sorry I spelt divorced wrong 😬
They chose to be apart. Best thing they ever gave us. So many things have been broken including our hearts. Thanks to our Lola for saving us ❤️
My parents divorced when I was 6, for 4 years I didn’t really understand what was going on or why, they weren’t together. I was just told we’re gonna stay here for a little bit, or he had to go somewhere. The years of not knowing what was happening built up. Eventually when I figured out what was really happening I really hurt, but I still had questions. Over the years I would just assume the reason why they divorced. I never wanted to ask because I was scared I would find out a scary truth, I also thought it might have been my fault. It hurt me for so long, one day I was sitting in my bed, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I finally built up the courage to ask the real reason. My mom told me that they had argued and fault sometimes, but the main reason the split is because they didn’t want me to grow up in a family where there was fighting. They figured it would cause problems later in my life. Still to this day I find out more and more reason that I didn’t know about. I am now at peace with the divorce, and both my parents are at a stable situation. But I’m glad my parents thought about my future, and that it what made their decision.
I know this one is about divorce but I always thought differently when I first heard this, made me think about my parents and how they treat each other despite claiming that they love one another,
Which is why I think it’s better to not stay just for the kids,
because broken relationships can make a home hell,
it’s not love to stay just for the kids or home in a toxic relationship like that, my mom and dad are a perfect example of this,
Divorce is not always the end of something good, it can also be the start of something better,
No judgement to anyone effected by divorce, know your not alone but also not everyone has the same situation as you and that’s fine, hope your doing well to anyone affected by divorce or toxic parents.
To my parents, but especially my Mom, who mustered the courage and the will to stick it out for the kids. Thank You for being the Light.
I haven't heard this since I was a kid
Wow
Still great
Nearly impossible to stay together forever in 2019 with all this bullshit coming in between us, all of this social media garbage. Greed, lust and narcissism. It’s a chaotic place to live. Only thing to do is move forward with positive thinking, overcome our fears and accept change.
I never listened to pop punk or music in general when I was younger and Blink was big. Maybe if they were on the radio or a movie soundtrack and I would never recognize them. But I listened to Dookie from Green Day for the first time last year and now listening to this at 24 years old, the 13 year old kid I was when my parents split needed this. Thanks Blink-182.
Makes me cry.
From a broken home to my own home with a beautiful family. Stay strong people
A lot of people seem to miss the point of the song. It's not saying "you should stay with someone you don't love any more and are fighting with for the sake of your kids." It's saying the exact OPPOSITE! DON'T stay in a loveless relationship full of fighting and resentment, because it will only make it harder for the kids to see their parents fighting all the time yet claiming they love each other. You need to be honest with your kids about how relationships sometimes end, or you're setting them up to have a very unhealthy idea of how relationships work.
christmas 2022, its nothin to be proud of but today i can truly relate and understand this song, this stings
You can call me a liar all you want but Im in 6th grade at the moment and I am obsessed with blink 182. My parents are divorced and I have three dads. This song hits me so hard the first time I heard it I cried. Blink is the best punk band I have ever heard I just recently discovered them again after a bit. And I finally got see them live in usana in salt lake city! It was raining but oh well. My ears also scarred for life. Ive heard the song before, but they played shit piss live.
Lmfaoo
this is my cure to my parents fighting. my therapy to know someone has felt this way before.
im 46 and this song makes me tear up. heh
Parents divorced 20 years ago, and I didn't really take to the new step mom until recently. Crushed in a motorcycle collision, I learned about how my life was tilted at 10 years old when laid up in the intensive care unit. This song speaks volumes to me, because my whole life with my siblings after the divorce was struggles, poverty and conflict. Learning about all of this while dealing with healing is rough, man.
Damn this and Adams song hits me different
To my Parents,
i didn't ask for anything from both of you. I just want to live my life by my own. Enough for tried to keep holding everything together by faking our feelings. cause we now we were not good at this "family" game. Live your life to, just forget the pain. Be happy on your own way, and i'll be too.