I've been struggling with this for over 4 years now and it's been a really rough ride. I've finished an elite highschool (non american ed system) where I started cracking under tremendous amount of pressure. Then I applied for college which I wasn't interested in and that's when it really started to escalate. After a year and a half, I dropped off, moved to a completely different country to study, which really helped me in a way because I moved myself miles and miles out of comfort zone, but on the other hand, this deep procrastination persisted. I am still looking for this intrinsically motivating thing and I'm secretly worried it might be something which my folks would not support or be happy with, some kind of business or interest where there's not a lot of money to be earned.
Hey Nikola, I think your fear of your intrinsically motivating thing being something your parents wouldn't support or something that doesn't pay the bills is holding you back from finding it. Try to go about it from a place of curiosity, experiment with different things, talk to people in different careers, revisit things you loved as a kid and let go of the pressure to do things perfectly or figure things out. Your intrinsically motivating thing doesn't have to be your job, it can even be a side hustle that your full-time job allows you to have. Also thanks to the internet, there are a ton of ways to monetize the most random things so don't worry too much about it or what others will think. At the end of the day you deserve to live a life that makes you happy and fulfilled
wow... this just clarified so much for me. I've been struggling to make any real progress on my music for a while now and I thought it was just my usual depressive tendencies... but after hearing this, it's now obvious to me that the more extrinsic pressure I put on my art... the less I want to do it. Which makes sense... it was never about what art and music could do for me... it was always about how it made me feel while doing it: centered and at peace.
Just read So Good They Can't Ignore You and I'm happy to have had my mind completely blown! Thank you for the paradigm shift! Your work has made my life better.
As a fully self-taught person, I find it ridiculous that Cal has to give advice such as "Get involved in your major and care, get interested in it". It just blows my mind that people have to be told stuff like this. At least Cal realized this and is making these people open their eyes.
I've been struggling with this for over 4 years now and it's been a really rough ride. I've finished an elite highschool (non american ed system) where I started cracking under tremendous amount of pressure. Then I applied for college which I wasn't interested in and that's when it really started to escalate. After a year and a half, I dropped off, moved to a completely different country to study, which really helped me in a way because I moved myself miles and miles out of comfort zone, but on the other hand, this deep procrastination persisted. I am still looking for this intrinsically motivating thing and I'm secretly worried it might be something which my folks would not support or be happy with, some kind of business or interest where there's not a lot of money to be earned.
You described my last 20 years. I hope you find the way, I am still struggling.
Hey Nikola, I think your fear of your intrinsically motivating thing being something your parents wouldn't support or something that doesn't pay the bills is holding you back from finding it. Try to go about it from a place of curiosity, experiment with different things, talk to people in different careers, revisit things you loved as a kid and let go of the pressure to do things perfectly or figure things out. Your intrinsically motivating thing doesn't have to be your job, it can even be a side hustle that your full-time job allows you to have. Also thanks to the internet, there are a ton of ways to monetize the most random things so don't worry too much about it or what others will think. At the end of the day you deserve to live a life that makes you happy and fulfilled
Professor Cal, thankyou for everything you are doing to help people.
wow... this just clarified so much for me. I've been struggling to make any real progress on my music for a while now and I thought it was just my usual depressive tendencies... but after hearing this, it's now obvious to me that the more extrinsic pressure I put on my art... the less I want to do it. Which makes sense... it was never about what art and music could do for me... it was always about how it made me feel while doing it: centered and at peace.
Just read So Good They Can't Ignore You and I'm happy to have had my mind completely blown! Thank you for the paradigm shift! Your work has made my life better.
Impressive, great analysis and insight.
As a fully self-taught person, I find it ridiculous that Cal has to give advice such as "Get involved in your major and care, get interested in it". It just blows my mind that people have to be told stuff like this. At least Cal realized this and is making these people open their eyes.
very relevant this video, in moment I am struggling with this problem, I fighting and I'll overcome the procrastination
I died the minute you said "Deep procrastination" you killing me right now but I love you work and everything