The Specter of Doubt
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
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About my videos: These videos are a resource for anyone wishing to wake up from the dream of separation. Awakening, enlightenment, and liberation are becoming far more mainstream possibilities than they once were. There are many good teachers out there, and if you resonate with the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, Rupert Spira, or Sadhguru, you might find resources here that address these deeper promptings to investigate your true nature.
Disclaimer: The information presented in these videos is not meant to diagnose or treat any psychiatric or medical illness. The inquiries presented herein are potent and can have powerful effects on the way you experience yourself and reality. If you feel you are at risk of harming yourself or others, these videos and practices may not be the best thing for you at the moment. Seek help wherever necessary which might include a hospital emergency department, a suicide helpline etc.
![Existential Terror and Loss of Self [Trigger Warning!!]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/OD_bBy0nxLI/mqdefault.jpg)
Thanks for reframing doubt as a helpful guide. That hits home!
Hi Angelo. I've had another "awakening/non dual experience" yesterday or whatever you want to call it. And I'm allowing myself to be human now, to have thoughts. I'm even letting the thoughts untangle themselves and it's interesting to see that or do that, like having a conversation with the thoughts and seeing that a lot of those thoughts are based on fear and it makes me have compassion toward these thoughts. Thank you Angelo, you've helped me a lot I think. It feels like I'm coming home.
Thank you for mentioning the driving thing. I've always been a defensive driver, but never have so many variables been introduced into the mix. It feels overall that I never want to leave home. In the metaphor of driving, I have always clearly seen that human bodies could not possibly cooperate in the mass numbers that we call "traffic". Watching traffic from an overhead perspective, it becomes obvious that a superior force is at work in a perfect flow.. Still my physical being takes little comfort in this revelation. Crashes happen.
Embrace Doubt. Doubt leads to exploration, reflection, and curiosity. Doubt is seasoning for our experience. Doubt is reason to release opinions and beliefs.
So weird... I was in a head-on collision couple days back, and at the time, it was fine, it was just what was happening, I don't recall feeling any fear or resistance at all.
Now all of a sudden I'm hit with this intense anxiety. And doubt/resistance. Overnight my whole experience is now coated in this inky tone of foreboding and this sense of dread that's getting louder. Nothing's the same... I'm walking around my house staring blankly at stuff because nothing feels even remotely familiar anymore. And there seems to be a bottomless waterfall opening up in my heart??
🙏🏼
This is so dead on what I’ve been experiencing. It’s always relieving to come back here and see that I’m not alone in my experience.
Thanks man, I now know where the irrational fear is coming from. Happened to hit me after some intense DMT experiences along with almost constant concern over the question "what is this?" and now I have felt exactly what you described. The fear is almost like a blackness but also a lead blanket...and is foreboding. I realized while going through the fear that there are fates worse than death.
Dr. Nader posted your interview today!! 🙌 I feel like this opens a lot of doors for the TM community. Thank you! 🙏
all of this doubt makes me think we may be getting close to awakening! doubt it though
i have no doubt - that this music is awesome !!!
This fear of being manifest in form…I was wondering why I’ve been so intensely feeling this fear of bodily injury or harm in seemingly random situations I never felt before. Images of the body, as you said, suddenly broken or torn apart in any of life’s possible accidents - it’s been so raw for months now. Now the intimate connection with what’s beyond all form is needed as you said - the urge to dispel all delusion. Man, I do feel like there’s no choice but to ride whatever tide this is, whatever is happening, but learning to reinterpret the language of doubt or fear which is actually pointing you in the “right” direction (as all happenings must be) - that’s the adventure I suppose 😅😊🙏🏼
Hello Rula, I think of doubt as that fear barrier(s), you get when you're coming into contact with anything that threatens the safety of the mental apparatus that keeps the binding process, and the psyche operating in the background. I had a similar incident to the one Angelo describes in the vid - - driving around a bend, and an oncoming sports car straddled the middle lane, before correcting seconds before we passed each other. My heart was in my throat. I felt the panic before I even processed what was happening. It's instinctive fear. I think at the primordial level it's the greatest fear of all - - am I about to die? I always found the anticipation of dread worse than the actual feared thing itself. Fear is almost always hidden in the shadows, but when something triggers it... boy, does it jolt the life outta you!! Psychological fear drives a lot of our behaviours. Fear is a powerful motivator in the 'social matrix'. Whenever I feel it, it's usually a good place to look at what's maybe going on beneath the surface - - because, as I say, it's often hiding and buried beneath layers of whatever conceals it!
@@nat998 I agree! Interestingly, I don’t recall the driving analogy that Angelo described in the video to have been coupled with an actual momentary threat of accident as you described in your experience. Rather, just driving without any incident you suddenly are very aware that anything can happen any moment with just a slight movement…that the line between life and death is much much thinner than you normally feel it is. But yes, I feel fear or that sense of dread you mention very often, even with mundane every day tasks sometimes. Fear has become, by force if not necessity, my greatest teacher. It feels like I have no choice but to look at it, face it, go through it instead of escape or distract. But the doubt comes in to question whether I’m truly facing it or not, or will I ever know life without it etc etc…but now I am also forced to question those thoughts, to see them as thought. It has become apparently too unbearable not to face it. I remember Eckhart Tolle saying that you have to come to the point where you suffered enough. But who knows. The years have made me more unsure than sure of anything.
@@nat998 Hey there! I just realized that you sent me a beautiful response to my last response. But somehow it’s not showing up here, I just saw it in my email. Do you see it? Maybe it’s just my RUclips or something? Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I wasn’t ignoring you! 😊
@@rulamazigi5839 Hello Rula! I don't think that about you 💛 but I re-read through your comment now, and it's still ringing true for me. Fear as the greatest motivator, and driver and teacher. Fear and doubt. These days I'm more unsure than I am sure about anything... It's disorienting a realization, that everything I know isn't the way things actually are, and that all my beliefs that I've clung to all my life lead to nothing. That maybe... there is no reason "why", or even that there should be a reason why... anything should be as it is. It makes me feel a newfound sense of appreciation for the fact I exist here at all... It seems so fragile and almost absurd a reality, and I've always just taken it for granted, along with all my beliefs, assumptions about myself and life...
I don't see my last comment 😂 but RUclips sometimes does that. Haha, it's a waffle of a response, so just as well!
Thanks for sharing your helpful experiences, and reflections along the journey. Keep going! 😀
This is unreal. I was literally JUST making a post about self-doubt in another group and then this video appears.
What are the odds of this happening...
Kismet
Thanks bud. At this 'particular' stage in my life, I find that doubt is a great tool. One which helps me recognise the myriad of things which are only belief and not instantiated experience (and there are many). Doubt shows me what is false (or partial) and how little I need to be certain of, in order to move forward in life and is the thing that gradually cleans away any mental and emotional detritus, or chips away at the barnacles of ego (the dodgy story I tell myself and convinces me of my separateness). This seems to help me rest in awareness and/or to step-out in faith, without the baggage of certainty. At least this my particular stand-in 'story', in lieu of a clearer insight!
thanks for explaining this. i've heard buddhists talking a lot about doubt but i never understood what it refers to. 😊
Thanks, I had been avoiding this fear for years because I was afraid of what I would find.
This video is great! Answeted questions I didn't know I had. Thanks Angelo! ❤
very grateful, thank you 🙏❤️
Thanks for this video, 🎯♥😶 🙏☮ wishing love, grace, courage and understanding for all. Please keep reminding because It does help us recognize, feel where to look. Thank you brother,Thanks for sharing truth
This song slaps my G
Hesitation tone… helpful description.
Is all hesitation a form of doubt?
💐💞 Very grateful. Thank you. 🙏🌞
Doubt seems to the mood of the ego. But the only thing we know for certain is "I am". Why pursue elsewhere?
Thank you so helpful , ❤
So glad you’re taking about this.
The array of T-shirts he owns is mind boggling…….🤣
No doubt that the truth is spoken here. Thank you 💚
Certainly my 'soup de jour'. Thank you as always Angelo. ❤
Aww man.
😂
Hesitation
But I’m working on it. Making progress
My doubt thought is how to initially function as law enforcement...considering the potential for serious physical danger. I've had the taste of not wanting to do anything or be anywhere and quite literally just wanting to sit in 1 spot for eternity. This is actually when the doubt first arose... "how can I possibly function as a cop like this". Poof taste test is over, the exit is on the left.
🙏
You got top tier thumbnails lmao
,,,,,the doubt îs looking in hiden places to find doubt ,and stay there!?,,,,a non identification mind with doubt has no need to do it,,,,and with fear too,,,!
The doubt I'm most often faced with is related to practice, especially with natural meditation. The mind seems to insist on analyzing words up close, instead of looking at what they point to, so often there come thoughts such as "Isn't 'centering' the attention, going back to not focusing on anything, effectively 'doing' something? But if I don't do anything about it, I'll just forget that I'm even mind-identified" and so on. Something just feels wrong, like a "damned if I do, damned if I don't" sort of situation, but since it's not every time that this happens, I guess it's just a matter of acceptance 😅
A related question I'd like to ask, or maybe leave as a suggestion for another video, is the polar opposite: what about "memory" and conviction? I notice that things seeming familiar is part of what keeps the spell of thoughts going. I look at my dog and, though there is no *thought* (on the surface), there is a feeling of familiarity, like a thoughtless "oh yeah, that's my dog, the dog that I know" sort of feeling. Same with everything - the room I live in, the food I eat, the people I live with, the places I visit. Is this sense of familiarity something worth addressing on its own, or is it better to keep on inquiry and meditation and let it drop naturally when it drops?
Ugh, this level of overthinking makes me feel sick. It sucks to be controlled by the mind like that. I've had this problem for years and years.
Re: first paragraph (natural meditation)... This is fairly typical when you begin to observe the mental thought loops. Just simply notice it for what it is... thoughts. When the mind starts wandering off, and analyzing the experience, and you engage with its "content" by thinking _about_ the meditation process, you're already lost in mind. So, simply see what it is. Oh look, that's a thought. No need to think further about it, or what it means. Just notice, remain neutral, and stay in the mode of observing what is coming and going in your field of experience. Pretty soon, thoughts will become less charged and engaging, and your mind will quieten down in terms of excessive thinking pulling you back into the unconscious mental thought stream. Just stay still and see what comes. Let thoughts be as they are. Don't become embroiled in it. Just sit and take note. Practice... ✨
I've also pondered the second part of your comment (memory and conviction), throughout my own journey. I think the crucial bit of advice is the simplest, yet not easiest thing, which is to observe direct reality experience. Almost child-like to do this. What is happening right now. There's a sense of a knowing this is my dog, and this is my body. I recognize this bodymind as being the _me_ I've always identified with. I look in the mirror and recognize the face as _mine_ . There's a recognition that this is my dog. I think the familiarity will never cease to exist. The Knowingness of these things, and the perceiving of all of this IS prior to anything that can said about it. What is _this_ 👁️ Knowing? What recognizes?
The felt sense of a _me_ who experiences all things, who feels that pull towards attaching labels and ownership to "things", who identifies _as_ an experiencer, in a world of experiences... _where_ is this sense of being coming from? It's not an answer, it has no form, or name. It _IS_ YOU. Always. The _You_ with no form or name or location or beginning. It is the only real thing happening right now, prior to anything that can be said, written or thought about what it is. Look within. Find this.
I think a lot of conditioned thinking is so sneaky to spot. A single doubt-thought can appear as an entire belief structure that seems to suggest something to be overcome - like the cessation of the memories held by someone, but what is being referenced by this belief... and what exactly _is_ the nature of this belief (in direct experience?)
Idle musings... thanks for sharing 🙏
@@nat998 hi Nat, many thanks for your elaborate replies!
On your first reply, yes, I can detach and just let the thoughts be, but I meant to say that even this "detaching" feels like a doing.
But again, even talking about this "feels off" to me. The part that's talking about it, trying to analyze it and improve it, is just part of the "seeker" identity... Just another layer.
I honestly am at a loss of words to accurately convey what happens, and express my doubt concerning it. Concerning this, I will just see if it gets burned down through practice 🙏
@@nat998 and you bring a good point on memory. Memory itselt is not the problem, the recalling/association of events happens spontaneously by simply course of how our brains work, but the identification with memory is what is binding...
And trying to get rid of it is indeed fruitless. But I've experimented a bit, looking at things like people do mirror gazing. Things start to seem strange, alien. But I can't take for truth anything that requires an effort to come about :)
Wow, this channel just turned dark 😱
what's up next, awakening horror stories? i'd tune in to that one
Maybe so …
are you trying to go through some subconscious work with background images or it's just fun?
So is doubt really just fear? And is it enough to be willing to feel the fear and open to it?
Hi I have to take gabapentin daily makes me feel almost manic could this prevent awaking😢???
No
I am doubtful of dought. Just not sure about it. I don't think it's real. But i keep at it. But I doubt that helps.
👌💗
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