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Do This to an Empath and They Will Disappear From Your Life

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  • @Mmbab2025
    @Mmbab2025 Month ago +294

    A healed empath who loves themself enough to stop shrinking is truly a beautiful thing 😊

    • @dawnimatrix
      @dawnimatrix 23 days ago +13

      Exactly. I’m done shrinking and diminishing my feelings and my opinions on things. I matter!

    • @Mmbab2025
      @Mmbab2025 22 days ago +1

      @dawnimatrix🙌🏾

    • @KateCoyle-q6v
      @KateCoyle-q6v 21 day ago +3

      I’m on that journey myself …….

    • @barreldreamz7852
      @barreldreamz7852 21 day ago +3

      These types of videos can be super detrimental. They really are designed to make you feel heard and special and excuse all of your shortcomings while pointing out all the negatives of anyone else. I understand the benefit of some of these videos but they are also a confirmation bias while pointing the finger at everyone else. Super super super unhealthy for a teenager or adolescents mind

    • @Lintisay
      @Lintisay 17 days ago +2

      ...like being set-free.

  • @johngervais7187
    @johngervais7187 Month ago +249

    When you realize people you would die for won't be slightly inconvenienced for you.

    • @jejegee
      @jejegee 11 days ago +7

      This.

    • @Dannyvirk
      @Dannyvirk 9 days ago +9

      Yeap, and the people i've walked away from tended to have no idea it's going to happen. They have unconsciously crossed a line, and done something, an action, a word that is something a person I can't be and don't want to be around would do.

    • @mermaid2997
      @mermaid2997 3 days ago +1

      💯.... can't waste precious energy on a person who doesn't care enough to even give you the time of day.

  • @Colby_914
    @Colby_914 Month ago +608

    I can put up with a lot…for a long time. I give second chances. Once it’s over for me it’s over. Forever.

    • @Gealgian
      @Gealgian 29 days ago +13

      Me too. And I was slated for giving chances, that was my fault! I always said, it's all or nothing with me. When I got very little back, I not only left, I erased everything this person left on me. I don't care, it's not worth it.

    • @FPwLola
      @FPwLola 28 days ago +4

      Agreed. 👌

    • @kascension
      @kascension 28 days ago +4

      SAME!!

    • @jspla
      @jspla 24 days ago +15

      I forgive twice. Won't be a 3rd

    • @Brooklyn-e4g
      @Brooklyn-e4g 18 days ago +2

      Same

  • @KING_SHOTS89
    @KING_SHOTS89 29 days ago +274

    As an Empath, we learn over time to observe more and absorb less. 🙏💯❤️

    • @JanetEbert-Powell-q6g
      @JanetEbert-Powell-q6g 25 days ago +8

      I hope so !

    • @MGraham-q9g
      @MGraham-q9g 13 days ago +5

      PERFECT!

    • @TrishThompson-s9z
      @TrishThompson-s9z 7 days ago +5

      The older we get the wiser we become. Thank God!!! I have no friends and hardly any family. I'm happier than I've ever been😊

    • @yawdiegamer7098
      @yawdiegamer7098 4 days ago +1

      Well said , I found out I was last year.

    • @MGraham-q9g
      @MGraham-q9g 2 days ago

      @yawdiegamer7098 what took you so long? empaths got their title only a short time ago, but we have been in the world a long time.

  • @LiaJ-ez6rz
    @LiaJ-ez6rz 28 days ago +80

    "Your nervous system is smarter than your hope." That landed.

    • @JanetEbert-Powell-q6g
      @JanetEbert-Powell-q6g 25 days ago

      This ? Will sound dumb but I'm curious bc I've heard the fluoride in our water kills our pineal gland, I think, could be wrong, but that gland is about our consciousness, empaths have a better grasp at this but I wonder how to enhance it, not hurt it

    • @LiaJ-ez6rz
      @LiaJ-ez6rz 25 days ago +1

      ​@JanetEbert-Powell-q6g
      I don't know how to answer you in a technical way. In an EQ way, I had to learn to respect my instincts as superb pattern recognition and trust myself. Now my brain knows it can flash me an image or give me a feeling that says leave the room now, and I will get up and do it, and find out later what it was saving me from. I still sometimes let hope override pattern recognition when the other person is someone I love; I'm working on it.

    • @JanetEbert-Powell-q6g
      @JanetEbert-Powell-q6g 25 days ago +1

      ​@LiaJ-ez6rzvery insightful Thank you ! I think with loved ones it's balance and patience. Knowing when to speak up or say nothing at all. Have a great day ! I appreciate that you took the time to answer me back, I know how busy everyone is. God Bless you and your family

    • @LiaJ-ez6rz
      @LiaJ-ez6rz 25 days ago

      ​@JanetEbert-Powell-q6g
      🤗 Best wishes to you and yours. 😊

    • @bellawitz85
      @bellawitz85 24 days ago +1

      @L​⁠ere is mercy and grace are given to those we love. Once we hit a point we are not accepting of abuses, healthier boundaries are put in place. If they continue to cross these, that is when you back away. Hope is not a bad thing, neither is offering that grace and mercy to those we allow into our lives. Being an empath is hard sometimes. We have to accept that we’re just a little weird. 😅

  • @diogenes5654
    @diogenes5654 Month ago +963

    The best thing I ever did for myself was to "divorce" damaging people, including members of my dysfunctional family

    • @Bat_Boy
      @Bat_Boy Month ago +17

      All love is conditional, except for a love from a parent to a child. That should always be unconditional, with as much "love language" as possible.
      Connection is a plant between two people, who tend it with with expressions of love, kindness, patience and mutual respect, in hopes it grows from weak to strong and then to flowers of love. But, its on the condition, the other puts in just as much effort as you do. Often, many connections stay at "weak", and never develop love. Weak ≠ bad. It's often the best possible outcome.
      If the other pours acid on the plant, over and over again. And you keep bringing water and nurture the connection as best you can...this is unsustainable. That connection plant will eventually die, or become very weak, with the impression it is love (when its not).
      Bottomline: Don't fall for "love everyone, especially if they are family". This is a mistake.

    • @willcook8583
      @willcook8583 Month ago +31

      I’m in the process of doing this for the first time in my life 😅 scary but no choice

    • @diogenes5654
      @diogenes5654 Month ago

      @willcook8583 it really does feel great once it's done. Accept that people will tell lies about you and if people want to hear the truth of the situation they can ask for the truth. And if not, move on, don't explain why. If you respond to this in any way, you are still under their thumb. I have some people in my life now who are not blood but are wonderful family members. I discovered that so many of my many friends were not friends at all. Quality over quantity. It's liberating. Good luck!

    • @vanessasmalley5078
      @vanessasmalley5078 Month ago +6

      Then good for you.head nod for your bravery

    • @s1nd3r3llee
      @s1nd3r3llee Month ago +8

      Yes, so did I. ❤

  • @susansaunders249
    @susansaunders249 Month ago +442

    Emotional dishonesty and passive aggression will drive me away

    • @mra-w4z
      @mra-w4z Month ago +2

      Why do people think they’re special in feeling this way? Do you think average people don’t feel the same way as you? You don’t think when someone realizes you’re lying or if you’re being passive aggressive that they won’t dislike you for it? UnLeSs YoUr a RaRe pOkEmOn EmPaTh? This is getting crazy with the Jung labels and dramatization.

    • @deniserothwell6325
      @deniserothwell6325 Month ago

      Yes I have had enough of someone who I have known for four years. I am an artist all my life. My so called friend thinks they are an expert in the art world as they have been going to drawing once a week for three years. They started to push unsolicited advice on what I should do with my work. Some gallery they found for one of their friends who rally can’t paint. The fact that the gallery took them on immediately means they are not a serious gallery but are using a business model which is they have high prices per week to the artist if they want to show their and still charge them a commission if they sell any work. It’s like paying high prices to get a book published. It’s call vanity publishing. Anyway they went on and on at me. I did not ask them for any advice. Art world is a very hard scene. I told them I could go out and get some such gallery and I could sell all m6 work at bargain prices. Then my collection would be scattered to the four winds. The work means me to me for now in my hands. I had had invited them to dinner for a relaxing evening not for a giant lecture! Also they keep on telling me that everyone is on the Geo politics. I can to a degree but seriously! Anyway I am sick of everyone at the moment and enjoying my solitude

    • @SC-hj3hr
      @SC-hj3hr Month ago +4

      ​@mra-w4zalot of people forgive or forget or don't care

    • @millionshadesofdarkness2165
      @millionshadesofdarkness2165 27 days ago +9

      ​@mra-w4z empaths simply mention this because they tolerate manipulation and passive aggression to a level that would drive a normal human insane 3 times over. This statement is simply a declaration of boundaries and self love that they denied themselves of for decades

    • @mra-w4z
      @mra-w4z 27 days ago +1

      @millionshadesofdarkness2165 They only tolerate it because they're the only ones that that focus so deeply on those things. The empath isn't powerless to decision making.

  • @Tiffany-d3r
    @Tiffany-d3r Month ago +231

    EmpathS also
    JUST NEED QUIET - it’s NOT judgement it’s just needing to retreat from EVERYONE

    • @YB882
      @YB882 Month ago +9

      Yes!🎯

    • @dianetersigni7359
      @dianetersigni7359 15 days ago +3

      🎯

    • @cherylfleck5606
      @cherylfleck5606 12 days ago +2

      Yeah retreat is a great word!

    • @julieseward1385
      @julieseward1385 12 days ago +5

      I've never heard or seen anything so completely me. Exactly me! I'm in the withdrawal phase right now. I feel it deeply as I retreat into myself. It's just a matter of time now. Because he isn't going to change. So, I will. 😢

    • @LauraSummers-xp4ob
      @LauraSummers-xp4ob 4 days ago +2

      100%! Ans it's something I never realized until I left my narcissist ex and began living alone for the 1st time since my children were born.
      Now I cherish and guard the peace that comes with it. It is priceless.

  • @ILive4Jesus
    @ILive4Jesus Month ago +60

    Can anyone else “feel” evil intent that lurks just below the surface of the narc?

    • @Rozanrox17
      @Rozanrox17 Month ago +7

      Yes and often you see their eyes glitter and go black at the same time somehow. ✨

    • @Cleome50
      @Cleome50 27 days ago +6

      The Bible calls this discernment 😊

    • @ILive4Jesus
      @ILive4Jesus 24 days ago +2

      @Rozanrox17I’ve seen the eyes turning black once. THAT was a surprise! It was a Pastor many years ago.

    • @Rozanrox17
      @Rozanrox17 23 days ago +2

      @ILive4Jesusyes, you never forget it.

    • @TheTriangelarSignals
      @TheTriangelarSignals 4 days ago +1

      @ILive4Jesus
      Were ’u referring to “Animosity” ?
      Lets go beyond Theories & perceptions (& internalized emotins)
      & put the words here (in this comments thread) into a factual reality!
      We’re you experiencing “Animosity” or not ?

  • @elisabeth432
    @elisabeth432 8 days ago +18

    key sentence: "proximity is maintained but intimacy is gone"!!! amazing! (minute 14)

  • @IamAnson777
    @IamAnson777 Month ago +1619

    How ironic...we empaths are watching this video to understand ourselves; I can't imagine a narcissist ever watching a video like this, do they even care what an empath is?

    • @A.ifill93
      @A.ifill93 Month ago +30

      To self absorbed to even contemplate for them😅🤦🏽‍♂️

    • @EricMcClarnon
      @EricMcClarnon Month ago +87

      Yet they’ll be the quickest to invalidate it without watching.

    • @VickieHines-oq3ym
      @VickieHines-oq3ym Month ago +1

      Anna is mentally ill.
      Where is her Mom?

    • @herbert9241
      @herbert9241 Month ago +9

      That's a presumption. For a start, there's at least one channel on here (ZION) which is run by a narc, and he literally repeats other channels' content without fully understanding what he's yapping about. And bolsters his comment page with his own sock accounts.
      Secondly, on a broader level, you overlook the possibility that not everyone shares your one-step-forward perspective. A narc can be so interminably entrenched in their labyrinth of delusion that they'll observe this type of content (and the comments) for purpose of repair hacks for their failed performance rather than reflect on their motivation. Some will convince themselves they're something they're not purely on the strength of a lexicon summary.
      Thirdly, a narc may be so broken by their elusive relationship with real love that they're cornered into a cul-de-sac of ethical motivation.

    • @daughterofbob-d5r
      @daughterofbob-d5r Month ago +8

      @herbert9241. I think your post proves that a narcissist is capable of listening to and misunderstanding this video.

  • @charlottew1245
    @charlottew1245 Month ago +629

    I feel very peaceful when the switch flicks off. I always warn people that once off, it's off for good but they are always shocked

    • @amymoore9234
      @amymoore9234 Month ago +40

      You said that perfectly. Once the switch is off…it’s off. And they’re always shocked.

    • @wellillbeitsme007
      @wellillbeitsme007 Month ago +30

      I hear you loud and clear. My favorite thing is I give anyone my trust until they give me reason not to.

    • @Flowerpot24
      @Flowerpot24 Month ago +34

      Thats what I say to people close to me, be careful not make me reach the point with your behaviour that I am done. Once your done to me you are gone and you'll never get get back in. I have cut many people from my life, I don't need their negative energy around me.

    • @Christfollower-f3w
      @Christfollower-f3w Month ago +14

      That is so the truth. I thought I was the only one!

    • @mistylacy9199
      @mistylacy9199 Month ago +4

      I always that was me being a double Scorpio haha. But now I get it! Mahalo🌺

  • @FaithInFullGearChannel
    @FaithInFullGearChannel Month ago +551

    Absolutely true! By the time we leave, we have told you 1000 times and have cried a million tears.
    This is excellent ❤thank you

    • @muddywitch9016
      @muddywitch9016 Month ago +10

      So so
      true.

    • @wellillbeitsme007
      @wellillbeitsme007 Month ago +15

      The dismay is beyond what our partners ever could understand😢

    • @alisonmacpherson8133
      @alisonmacpherson8133 Month ago +3

      YES!! 👍💯 🎯🎯🎯

    • @gypsywoman9140
      @gypsywoman9140 27 days ago +4

      This may be true for some.
      Others have been through this too many times before. So now we say nothing and let their actions speak for themselves. Once we have concluded "This Person dgaf about me" we don't waste the effort in trying to talk things out or hold them accountable. We already know how they'll respond:
      They DARVO. Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender. (99% of the time, in my experience.)
      Instead, we quietly ghost, block, pray we never see them out in the wild, wonder "Why do I keep meeting toxic users? Is it something I'm doing wrong?" And otherwise try to heal and move on with our lives. Or cocoon ourselves cuz this ish is like being retraumatized over and over again by different people. But the cocooning can be its own form of healing.

    • @AWNoNickname
      @AWNoNickname 23 days ago +5

      As you age, you say less and don't cry. You just leave.

  • @1959aak
    @1959aak 17 days ago +22

    When wounded an empath feels it in their bones, muscles, blood, and brain. When they're done it's complete because their body can no longer tolerate the agony.

    • @foundingfatherstoday
      @foundingfatherstoday 15 days ago

      Like a piece of your eould chipped away every time.. and when your life force is at then end…. You have to disappear…. Leave….
      or anymore of the exposure you experience will literally kill you

    • @foundingfatherstoday
      @foundingfatherstoday 15 days ago

      Soul…. Not eould…. Sorry autocorrect

  • @AndY2K1999
    @AndY2K1999 25 days ago +38

    It’s amazing how spot on this is. Just because it was narrated by AI doesn’t mean the information wasn’t accurate or useful.

  • @lauriekase8745
    @lauriekase8745 Month ago +212

    It’s true that you will not see any signs of us leaving your life only because we don’t know when it’s coming ourselves. It’s never planned, we just reach that moment where enough is enough and we have to move on. We were gone long before we actually left.

    • @ocean3638
      @ocean3638 17 days ago +3

      Wow! Was just thinking this today. Definitely, when done, absolutely done.

    • @Lintisay
      @Lintisay 17 days ago +7

      @ocean3638 Same. I'm done explaining.music to the deaf. I just go dance somewhere else.

    • @moe9246
      @moe9246 4 days ago +3

      You hit the nail on the head.

    • @lindabass2281
      @lindabass2281 2 days ago +2

      I don't when enough is enough until there comes a moment when I am around you and the stress within becomes the hint it's time to leave and heal from the pain and tears.

  • @elan007
    @elan007 Month ago +1511

    Empaths have integrity, and patience, and we have limits to bullshit!

  • @auroraborealis6009
    @auroraborealis6009 Month ago +540

    When I’m done, I’m done. You no longer exist in my world. I’ll avoid even accidental encounters

    • @NegG1919
      @NegG1919 Month ago +3

      Avoidance is acknowledgment. You're running from something not simply turning inward.

    • @OneLMichele9091
      @OneLMichele9091 Month ago +27

      Not sure why, but I do the same. I can only give so much.. and absorb toxic behavior.. to a point. But, when I'm done, I'm done. Yes, it feels like a switch flips off and I don't look back.
      I see this as self-care, as I must honor my own emotional health over another's need to control & confuse me.

    • @auroraborealis6009
      @auroraborealis6009 Month ago +11

      @NegG1919it’s just turning off the awitch

    • @Le4befar
      @Le4befar Month ago +21

      When you see that person in the supermarket aisle. Then you walk in the opposite direction.

    • @Goldilocks24
      @Goldilocks24 Month ago +17

      I do this also and it’s because when I’m done and pull back…my body and mind feel so much better and the drama is gone…I don’t want to give a single second more of my health…mental or physical to them.

  • @Saint_Michael7
    @Saint_Michael7 10 days ago +9

    People think we're stupid when we play along and decide it just not worth our energy to address things over and over

  • @slickwillie9526
    @slickwillie9526 Month ago +30

    I have an uncanny ability to read the room. I can spot power dynamics in a split second, and it turns me off immediately.

    • @kazookie1567
      @kazookie1567 Day ago

      Same, somehow, not as fast but yes.
      And i also don't like it.

  • @indianex-muslimbano465
    @indianex-muslimbano465 Month ago +252

    I see empaths as normal beings while every else is distorted....

    • @robotnoir5299
      @robotnoir5299 Month ago +3

      I see empaths as people with superiority complexes who don't take anyone's emotions seriously except their own... and you just confirmed it.

    • @anthony-m1l6z
      @anthony-m1l6z Month ago +14

      @robotnoir5299 off your meds?

    • @robotnoir5299
      @robotnoir5299 Month ago +3

      @anthony-m1l6z I take it that it's genuine concern and empathy that makes you ask, and not mean-spirited sarcasm, right?

    • @indianex-muslimbano465
      @indianex-muslimbano465 Month ago +4

      ​@robotnoir5299I said normal not super

    • @indianex-muslimbano465
      @indianex-muslimbano465 Month ago +6

      You confirmed my comment

  • @cyberfish6849
    @cyberfish6849 Month ago +157

    This is insanely accurate...Actually, your entire empath series is insanely accurate.

    • @wellillbeitsme007
      @wellillbeitsme007 Month ago +4

      Man, I know the feeling that you got from that it was like someone was personally analyzing my secret afflictions with people in relationships

    • @NurseJenny79
      @NurseJenny79 4 days ago

      Entire series???? Oh man! I’m going to look now! Thank you! I have NEVER had anyone describe me like this before!! More please……

  • @cultyklatch
    @cultyklatch Month ago +1695

    Dear Normies and Narcs, Believe this info. Empaths:
    -FEEL IT WHEN YOU'RE LYING
    -HEAR WHAT YOU DON'T SAY
    -KNOW WHAT YOUR SILENCE MEANS
    -SEE YOUR MICRO EXPRESSIONS AND GESTURES THAT YOU CAN'T COMPLETELY CONTROL
    YOU'RE NOT FOOLING US, WE'RE JUST NOT CALLING YOU OUT, YET.

    • @tracylawrence1613
      @tracylawrence1613 Month ago +50

      I definitely see and feel the body language. My daughter always knew I knew when she was lying.

    • @VOLightPortal
      @VOLightPortal Month ago +19

      Oh dear. There's definitely a hunch that a person could be lying but we can't just go round accusing people without hard evidence unless we want to get ourselves in a defamation lawsuit... the traditional empath simply is able to recognize the pain of others and can imagine how it must feel that we feel it too, and I would automatically want to console them for that. But I would not start accusing others of something based on a feeling, I did that before and got into trouble for it. Even if we think a person is no good we must tread carefully.

    • @KiraLovesMichael
      @KiraLovesMichael Month ago +4

      🙏

    • @robotnoir5299
      @robotnoir5299 Month ago +6

      @VOLightPortal Everyone except psychopaths can recognize the pain of others, imagine how it feels, and feels a temptation to console them (although that's not always for the best). If you don't know that, you might be LESS in touch with the average person's emotions than average.

    • @katherinegranger1995
      @katherinegranger1995 Month ago +4

      E😊xactly. Well said

  • @darrellmarshall4821
    @darrellmarshall4821 26 days ago +10

    For an empathetic person deciding to leave is like a death. And then you grieve. And then you struggle to move on and redefine themselves without that person.

  • @froglizard7145
    @froglizard7145 Month ago +42

    I'd love to hear a real person reading this as opposed to AI

    • @deidraannemartinebates1602
    • @cheriejohnston486
      @cheriejohnston486 Month ago +6

      @deidraannemartinebates1602 yes, and visual media created or assembled by a human. The AI here went so far afield I was shocked.

    • @qc5870
      @qc5870 Month ago +7

      Agreeed. I'm sick of AI

    • @kundalinicowgirl
      @kundalinicowgirl 9 days ago +2

      Yes, given the content, it's pretty ironic that I could hear the mispronunciations and incorrect intonation. An empath can also sense when a machine that is ruining the world is involved and not a person.

    • @SomeRidiculousName
      @SomeRidiculousName Day ago

      ​@kundalinicowgirlI've added a similar comment and the irony made me smile.

  • @KellyWalker-n5v
    @KellyWalker-n5v Month ago +296

    I knew I was an empath by 8 or 10 years old. It has been painful my whole life. I have cut off many people (4) who betrayed me and am now 78. I always felt that cutting off someone was a fault of mine. Thanks for the video, its a kind expression of who I am.

    • @Lucypage2838
      @Lucypage2838 Month ago +9

      I have cut of many people as well.

    • @keloreilly7017
      @keloreilly7017 Month ago +22

      73 yr old here. I feel I have been an empath ( labeled too sensitive ) since the beginning. I felt deeply and took everything in everyday. People have come and gone from my Life and it hurt but then I realized that I am the one who left them. 😊

    • @LucyDawson-e7i
      @LucyDawson-e7i Month ago +15

      I’m 74 and it was exactly like that for me except that it started when I was very little and had no idea what was erong with me. It took many many many years before I realized that there wasn’t anything wrong with me. Now I trust my feelings and experiences and stopped second-guessing myself and wondering why it never worked..

    • @wendyhoogsaad1868
      @wendyhoogsaad1868 Month ago +12

      I hope you don't mind me responding to your comment, I too am an empath, the emotions I've carried for other people's disloyalty is soul destroying and has left me completely friendless and used as a scapegoat by a family that has decided my used by date is up, my life is a burden

    • @wendyhoogsaad1868
      @wendyhoogsaad1868 Month ago +1

      I found your talk to be right at me and the people that have been chosen to share my life 😢have been proven to be disloyal, and for my own wellbeing soul destroying, an abuser would have got off lighter, but I've carried on for this lifetime of abuse, but God gave me my guardian angel, my husband ♥️ where sometimes I wonder how he got his strength to continue this horrible life, so thank you from the bottom of my heart, these words calmed a storm that's been raging❤

  • @AuntEdna1
    @AuntEdna1 Month ago +187

    Comes a time when we stop making excuses for bad behavior. No matter what the connection is. ✌🏽💕

    • @maggiedickenson1996
      @maggiedickenson1996 8 days ago

      After 25 years of making excuses for my partner, and justifying his bad behavior I've finally reached a point where I can no longer do it. Tough few months ahead but there is no going back for me now.

  • @Jillie285
    @Jillie285 Month ago +391

    All my life I've been told I'm too sensitive but I knew deep down my sensitivity reflected THEIR lack empathy. But I was told so many times that I stayed with a narcissist for years. Wasted so many years. Then one day I was done. Just done. I felt nothing. I needed to say nothing. It was just gone. My heart wasn't broken. I wasn't angry. I was finally emotionally free.

    • @laniebug7265
      @laniebug7265 Month ago +29

      My response to people that call me too (or overly) sensitive is “it’s better than being insensitive.” It’s funny but they never say that to me again.

    • @merlinsteindorf-elsner1150
      @merlinsteindorf-elsner1150 Month ago +9

      had a girl tell me I'm to sensitive.
      In an attempt to still protect her ego I just formulated it like she is empathic and loving for societies standards but love and empathy are endless
      She still called it an insult and it gave her the power to "end the conversation herself"
      This was after I rejected her multiple times. Giving her the benefit of a doubt I came closer for a week and it proved my instincts right, avoidant with narcissistic traits, not yet ready to show weakness and bond. The only strong emotional response after a slight criticism/questioning of something that only resulted in insults, shifting blame and reflecting most talking points. Also slight Gaslighting.
      The point is I don't think of her as a bad person thats even fully aware of what she is doing. Just trapped in her self-defense mechanisms and surviving.
      And I know why she seeks me out, what I could give her to develop and treat her....but I honestly deserve better than this drama shitshow.
      I just feel so bad for not helping.

    • @longhouse1
      @longhouse1 Month ago +3

      Strive for balance , the empathy he is talking about is extreme and not balanced

    • @zapbutton8553
      @zapbutton8553 Month ago +2

      ​@merlinsteindorf-elsner1150 If you approach a person to analyse their psychological makeup, to proof yourself right in the end, you aren' t ready yourself to let someone in.
      If you don't like her, don't.
      If you criticize me before knowing me, to test me, sorry i'd became rude too .
      What's with the passive-aggressive egotrip "oh, what i could, if she would", i guess you're possibly either obsessive or judgemental, it sounds a bit fringe incel-ish.
      My guess, you're not sorry at all.
      Wow, you showed her😂

    • @Jillie285
      @Jillie285 Month ago

      ​@zapbutton8553oh someone is a triggered troll.

  • @l.morningstarr1870
    @l.morningstarr1870 Month ago +30

    I’ve never felt more seen, heard, or understood.

  • @sarahhale-pearson533
    @sarahhale-pearson533 Month ago +57

    Oooofff. This one hit the nail on the head. Love and peace to all who find themselves here.

    • @MillionGramMarch
      @MillionGramMarch 7 days ago

      Totally agree!!!! Wow.

    • @joannegaughan6132
      @joannegaughan6132 7 days ago

      To you too...love and peace. I was a pediatric nurse and it was heavenly to be able to help those children. I could read them like a book. Very satisfying job. Except for the losses 😢which had me crying in the bathroom at the loss of such potential and of such a young life. Mercifully few thanks to all the progress in the medical profession.

  • @rosesullivan8629
    @rosesullivan8629 Month ago +162

    It brings me to tears hearing someone that understands

    • @nemoluminar
      @nemoluminar Month ago +11

      Most people here understand you I bet... we're probably all Empaths commenting here. So do not despair or feel alone... coz your not :)

    • @horsluva0758
      @horsluva0758 Month ago +5

      Here, here. From an empath

    • @qc5870
      @qc5870 Month ago +4

      Lol it's AI 😵‍💫

    • @JuliaPerschon
      @JuliaPerschon 28 days ago

      Same. I feel seen for the first time in decades.

    • @DrRepper
      @DrRepper 26 days ago

      You're hearing AI generated content. Or 'content' as in 'satidfied', as the AI narrator would put it.

  • @arthuritis4503
    @arthuritis4503 Month ago +167

    I disappeared from a close family member a month ago for my own sanity and protection. It was hard but I have peace.

    • @wellillbeitsme007
      @wellillbeitsme007 Month ago +11

      Be strong that too shall pass your piece is always more important than someone else’s, passive aggressive dismay with your decision

    • @sjmtc3450
      @sjmtc3450 Month ago +6

      I had to do that 3 years ago after my father's passing. You will miss them but realize you have a right to peace. To not be used or lied about. And to have joy.
      It's ok

    • @patriciaroysdon9540
      @patriciaroysdon9540 26 days ago +5

      Major hugs coming your way. I have traveled a similar path.

    • @class1188
      @class1188 6 days ago +1

      Same here sweetheart and I'm not going back to my family

    • @juliesmith1565
      @juliesmith1565 5 days ago

      I did it for a year, just felt empty to that person

  • @Tipperary757
    @Tipperary757 Month ago +119

    Empaths see the nanosecond real emotion on people's faces before the mask goes on. They feel the deception and know what is going on, things will get worse. Not forgotten.

  • @RenwolfZona-kwz
    @RenwolfZona-kwz Month ago +34

    I have always said the truth is in the quiet. When something is NOT SAID. Oh Boy.

  • @RobShedden
    @RobShedden 9 days ago +7

    My wife is an empath and we have been separated for a week (married for 20 years). This video points out everything I've ever down (not intentionally) to not show up for her. She's been telling me I've got unprocessed trauma for years and fought that so hard. But I was wrong. Now I know that I need to change... and then i can see if there is anything left to save. I've had trouble experiencing any emotion for years and now the flood gates have opened. This video had me in tears and I am grateful for finding it!❤

    • @gaylejones1545
      @gaylejones1545 3 days ago +1

      Praying it's not too late. 🙏🙏

    • @CarilynnSuzanne
      @CarilynnSuzanne 15 hours ago

      You can do this, Rob! Just by watching this video and writing your comment is a huge start…the truth will always set you free. 🤗❤️

  • @PeggyScribner
    @PeggyScribner Month ago +46

    Empaths soak up feelings,that's why we try to make those around us happy.

  • @watching99134
    @watching99134 Month ago +179

    Maybe empaths are the normal ones, everyone else just lives in a world of shared delusion(s)?

    • @mazzame6480
      @mazzame6480 Month ago +2

      Im de-lu-lu+live in my own bubble just popping out when I got 2b an adult! 😂❤

    • @lesleyelalami2562
      @lesleyelalami2562 Month ago +11

      Exactly how I see the world. x

    • @tnt01
      @tnt01 Month ago +4

      100%

    • @kimparke6653
      @kimparke6653 Month ago +8

      Exactly what I read in an article based on research. Approximately 25% of the population is empathetic or normal.

    • @romystumpy1197
      @romystumpy1197 Month ago

      Thats how it see it,feel it,

  • @bethharvey5170
    @bethharvey5170 Month ago +313

    It comes after a thousand paper cuts.

    • @cornypinkuni9519
      @cornypinkuni9519 Month ago +8

      Yes. Well said.

    • @irenekotarac1346
      @irenekotarac1346 Month ago +18

      Oh wow, that is so powerful & l know exactly what you're talking about. God bless.

    • @cherylj8720
      @cherylj8720 Month ago +11

      Best way of putting it ever heard...Thank You ❤

    • @matanatarot
      @matanatarot Month ago +10

      Or one big stab through the heart that you tried to heal for many years, but never really did. And after that those little stabs once in a while. This is about my son. Not that easy to let go because there was a grandson who so was attached to me. Since 2 years I did let go and I feel the pain of loosing my grandson still, only him.

    • @juliemcclimans5943
      @juliemcclimans5943 Month ago +8

      Death by a thousand cuts- i just said that out loud the other day

  • @ole88bluegmc
    @ole88bluegmc 20 days ago +15

    "Their inner world is a burden they are only permitted to carry alone" This cut so deep, and actually made me cry.

  • @dorindacontreras1094
    @dorindacontreras1094 Month ago +10

    We wait and hope until we can’t. Then we’re done. That’s it.

  • @jc_quin
    @jc_quin Month ago +288

    I feel so seen by hearing this video, I feel nurtured in the middle of my own storm

    • @andrea111-1
      @andrea111-1 Month ago +7

      Such a real response. ❤

    • @NegG1919
      @NegG1919 Month ago +2

      Me too, how narcissistic of us, lol

    • @dorindacontreras1094
      @dorindacontreras1094 Month ago +11

      It’s because we all feel unseen and wait patiently to be seen. I cried through parts of this. I think it’s the first time I have heard me explained. ❤

    • @nemoluminar
      @nemoluminar Month ago +3

      Dont worry brother, it will calm down ones you are comfortable in your solitude or beeing without those "friends" or "family members". You're an adaptable individual ;)

    • @andy1971williams
      @andy1971williams Month ago +1

      It's so nice, isn't it .

  • @jackiepark4673
    @jackiepark4673 Month ago +98

    If everyone felt how an empath felt the world would change as they really care unlike the shallow people whom only think of themselves.

    • @jamescreek1319
      @jamescreek1319 Month ago +1

      Well said I often think that same thing.

    • @robotnoir5299
      @robotnoir5299 Month ago +2

      Said like a true empath. Always assuming you're better than everyone else, and not recognizing other people emotions. ALL people care about something strongly, except maybe psychopaths. Who are you to declare you're the only ones doing it right? You were only thinking of yourself and your own self-gratification when you wrote this comment, and deliberately tried to implant self-doubt in other people. That's just vindictive nastiness. Is that what your "care" looks like? Is this sort of divisive rhetoric making the world a better place?

    • @anthony-m1l6z
      @anthony-m1l6z Month ago +7

      @robotnoir5299 why are you just here to bash others.
      you are hurting. We can tell. We do not think we are better, are right etc it is because We have been through the fire that burnt away labels and egos. We have been deeply hurt time after time but We will still not give up on others

    • @robotnoir5299
      @robotnoir5299 Month ago +2

      @anthony-m1l6z "We have been through the fire that burnt away labels and egos. We have been deeply hurt time after time but We will still not give up on others" Oh, so you're identical to 99% of people.
      "why are you just here to bash others" I'm here to tell you that every time I've encountered a self-identifying "empath" in my life, it has been a deeply negative experience, and I'm explaining why. EVERYTHING is about them. Your parents die, and they think they're more upset than you are.
      Is it so hard for you to empathize with my position? Let me guess... the only thing that's occurring to you right now is that you're not being showered with compliments, so your furious, and not considering my perspective at all. "Empath" confirmed.

    • @anthony-m1l6z
      @anthony-m1l6z Month ago +1

      @robotnoir5299 wrong. I am thinking what has hurt YOU. what have you been through.
      Yes I have been through a lot. racial abuse, phycological and physical abuse, suicide thoughts when I was about 7-8yrs, attacked 5xs since 2010 and one was an attempted murder being hit over the head al least 20xs and left for dead, work accident where I cut my arm with a chainsaw that left my right hand without feeling apart from my little finger and half the ring finger, being mixed race and adopted, drug abuse, abonnement issues to name a few.
      But my traumas used to define me and it became an easy way out until I said to myself no more the past does not define me.
      I do not need or want compliments, pity etc I want true connection.
      If you want to talk about yourself I am here to listen without judgement.
      One thing I know is that I really do not know anything.
      I wish you peace and love.

  • @artbytoniZip
    @artbytoniZip Month ago +105

    I am an empath and I agree with this entire message. We take it and take it and then we get done. Once we get done we don't go backwards because you hurt our heart and took advantage of our good nature, so you lost the privilege to know us and have us in your life. I don't tell the person I'm done, I just disappear. I don't have to explain anything to anyone.

    • @notme-h7f
      @notme-h7f Month ago +5

      ❤❤❤

    • @SimmiePayne
      @SimmiePayne Month ago +7

      Dam straight!!

    • @Slightlysalty1
      @Slightlysalty1 Month ago +4

      It feels deeper than the heart to me. It is like singeing the fibers of that connection to my soul.

    • @kittyamaailouraphile9300
      @kittyamaailouraphile9300 Month ago

      Time and time again I forgive my adult child this last time they turned on me and the grand kids stopped speaking to me

    • @artbytoniZip
      @artbytoniZip Month ago

      @kittyamaailouraphile9300 oh no well they will follow the parents suit. Keep trying because if you don't have contact with your grandbabies I know how painful that is so try again to make nice with your kids so you can see those babies. My heart feels for you Hun.

  • @petercooper6546
    @petercooper6546 Month ago +32

    I'm astounded at the accuracy of this description.

  • @screenteasing
    @screenteasing 15 days ago +6

    There's a really dangerous combination if you are an empath and another person in your life a narcissist.

    • @HogeN1337
      @HogeN1337 10 days ago

      notreally... you stay few years longer then you should becouse you listen to heart insted brain ^^

    • @screenteasing
      @screenteasing 10 days ago

      ​@HogeN1337 the more time you stay, the larger the hurt. Therefore yes you are right, one stays longer that's why it's such a dangerous combination because of accumulated "wounds" one has to recover from. Sometimes people don't recover and are fighting just to survive.

  • @jeroldeddins1209
    @jeroldeddins1209 Month ago +64

    Cut your losses and just move on. No need for arguments or drama.

    • @therealhughleys4872
      @therealhughleys4872 Month ago +5

      Agree. The alternative is exhausting.

    • @latashabreal9077
      @latashabreal9077 28 days ago +2

      Tie up my walking 👟 because it done played in my mind so many times and then it was enough. Been saying goodbye for too long

  • @raemarie3973
    @raemarie3973 Month ago +99

    We see EVERYTHING all the time. We're acutely aware of frequency even if you are not. We give the benefit of the doubt until we don't. When we turn away from you, it's been a long time coming so bury your shock to our words and boundaries; you earned this over months and years.

  • @Burbankelly
    @Burbankelly Month ago +209

    Backstabbing/betrayal. It's over.

    • @jamescreek1319
      @jamescreek1319 Month ago +13

      I used to say that an empathetic person was like a bucket 🪣 it holds a lot of water but one drop to many and it’s done but now I am more like a shot glass lol one drop too many and it’s over.

    • @JaneWest001
      @JaneWest001 Month ago +6

      @jamescreek1319
      Yup, I can't deal anymore. There's a lot of people I won't even go near to begin with

    • @jackanderson8217
      @jackanderson8217 16 days ago

      what about your mother did it?

    • @foundingfatherstoday
      @foundingfatherstoday 15 days ago

      Unless you have 2 narcissistic parents.. then it is a life long battle to finally break free

    • @attilaficsor2944
      @attilaficsor2944 13 days ago

      Blackmail/oppress. It’s over.

  • @Terranaut_67
    @Terranaut_67 Month ago +8

    I walked away from my cousin Paul. He invited me to come down to the house for the weekend, an hour ride for me to Taunton. We had a smoke and I was just about to settle down for the night when he stuck his head in the room and said "I had to go because he had a p.o.a. coming over. I realized where his priorities were, not with family. I folded the blanket, got back in my FJ Cruiser and made my way back to Cambridge. Never talked or reached out again. His loss.

  • @elainemiller145
    @elainemiller145 Month ago +35

    I closed the window on my father when I was a young adult. When he was in hospice I went to see him for the first time in many years. He apologized but also said that he was so wrong about who I was as a person. It was truly a heartfelt apology. I’ve been married 49 years. My window closed on my husband years ago. I was busy raising kids then 4 grandkids. I was also a caregiver for my mom for 7 years. He did his thing and I did mine. He’s now retired and in poor health. He has finally realized that the relationship has changed but I believe in my vows and will stay and continue to care for him. I no longer need reassurance from anyone anymore. I’ll just keep doing me to the best of my abilities. I’m also basically a loner so I don’t necessarily get lonely. It’s solitude.

    • @dawnfrancis2247
      @dawnfrancis2247 Month ago +2

      Its inner peace

    • @ginfogel7777
      @ginfogel7777 Month ago +1

      So sorry that you have gone through so much heartache in your life. I too have nine brothers and sisters that I don’t have a relationship with. I can really relate to what you’re saying on so many levels. I’m a 61 years old and have been married to a narcissist for 42 years with multiple battle scars to prove it. I also believe in my vows and I won’t leave. This is my life until Christ takes me home. I try to make the best of it with my adult children, trying to love on them and be supportive, always sharing the good news of Christ to them. Thank God that this has paid off as my daughter’s also love Christ. I feel like that is my biggest accomplishment. Hang in there. Remember, God sees everything and we are storing treasures in heaven. 🙏🏻😘

    • @elainemiller145
      @elainemiller145 Month ago

      @ginfogel7777bless you. I’m grateful to God for the strength he’s given us to keep going and continue in our faith ❤️🙏🏻

  • @AnthonySherritt
    @AnthonySherritt Month ago +115

    This is so me. Learning to shut off people has been a long and painful lesson I've had to learn.

    • @wellillbeitsme007
      @wellillbeitsme007 Month ago +4

      But a lesson learned should be a lesson saved so you can see it when it’s coming again

  • @laurierounds7102
    @laurierounds7102 Month ago +104

    This is an accurate description of my failed marriage to a narcissist. I am an empath. I stayed way too long, tried to explain too much to a person that could not care, could not empathize, could only control & dominate.
    I left him emotionally 5 years before I left him, just as described in this lecture. I erected walls of protection & finally realized he would never change, never care, never stop hurting me.

    • @RaigaLewis
      @RaigaLewis Month ago +7

      I hope you find true love ❤

    • @annmariebisceglia5498
      @annmariebisceglia5498 25 days ago +4

      You have expressed yourself extremely well. Your description is everything that has swirled around in my brain for years. After giving IN so many times over a 20 year marriage, trying to fix things, giving him second and third chances, I finally gave UP. After finding out about his first (of many) affairs I began to slowly disconnect emotionally, long before disconnecting physically and permanently.

    • @jjones4314
      @jjones4314 22 days ago +3

      Kudos to you for your strength & courage! I wasn't married to the narcissist (thankfully) but we were together for 13 yrs. It was total HELL! The drugs, excessive drinking, cheating, poor hygiene & constant lying finally took its toll, I'd had enough & I walked away for good! That was almost 7 yrs ago. The freedom & peace I have now is incredible! Life is good! 😊

    • @JennyGreen-ed4kp
      @JennyGreen-ed4kp 19 days ago +5

      Yep it took me 3 goes to leave my ex who was a narcissist, I just kept feeling his feelings and it was horrible tbh. Finally the 3rd go I did it. But as a typical narcissist he turned into the most horrible person permanently. It’s been tough as kids were involved. He remarried and I have decided it’s easier to live alone with my dog.

  • @Terry-i8z
    @Terry-i8z Month ago +162

    True, accurate explanation. Dead on . Cut you out after being dismissed, gaslight, treated with indifference ignored made to feel guilty about everything I do or don't do after a certain point you're done and I never look back not mad not angry. Just done. This is very accurate

    • @indianex-muslimbano465
      @indianex-muslimbano465 Month ago +4

      Hovering is the biggest scam😢...they keep you entangled to bs again

    • @marcieotto8600
      @marcieotto8600 Month ago +6

      But, he is correct. It's not done. We still process it for years afterwards. No, we never go back but we still grieve and process. I had to do that with each of my eight siblings throughout the decades, one at a time. The earlier ones were the easiest to let go of because they were violent. The later ones were much, much harder. 😪

  • @WillieM149
    @WillieM149 10 days ago +7

    He's describing my behaviour. It's good to have it explained & named. Now I know I'm not a misfit. I'm an empath. Thank you.😊

  • @lakukarikscha1417
    @lakukarikscha1417 28 days ago +3

    Empathic people carry the role of spiritually maturing parents in a society essentially filled with emotionally spoiled and ignorant teenagers

  • @kimlersue
    @kimlersue Month ago +18

    Empaths always forgive. But pushed beyond limits...they may be forced to walk away forever. Forgiving doesn't necessitate repeating a bad experience. Forgiveness...is in the nature of a real empath.

  • @KaraBaker-ux3wr
    @KaraBaker-ux3wr Month ago +28

    As an empath, I want to say that this is spot on. I am so tired of my friends or family thinking that I am not strong because I am full of empathy and compassion. When the line is crossed- for me it’s lying to my face, consistently rewriting history or gaslighting. Then when I make the decision to pull back. I am still kind and compassionate but I am not fully there. Eventually the normies notice and I get accused of being cold and unfeeling. That is when I feel like no one in my life really knows me. It is so hard. It is amusing that they think I am both over sensitive and a push over while also being cold and unfeeling. I’m now 60. I close the window way faster now. I don’t have time to waste on narcissists. I do adapt to people growing and changing, it just surprises me how many people actually do. The sad part is that I end up feeling like I have half relationships not balanced complete ones.

  • @RS-ms1bz
    @RS-ms1bz Month ago +32

    After reading many of the comments, most who believe they are empaths, really aren't.

    • @DayTrippingwithMimiandPaPa
      @DayTrippingwithMimiandPaPa Month ago +6

      Glad I’m not the only to see this.

    • @Frogtowns
      @Frogtowns Month ago +6

      So true! I was reading and wondering why the comments are so boisterous, when I know that’s not at all how I work. It’s pretty stealthy.

    • @beatrixbrennan1545
      @beatrixbrennan1545 Month ago +7

      Seriously. My cousin is the most self-centered, judgemental person i know who could give a crap less about anyone..... and she claims she's an empath. Lol The delusion is real with folks.

    • @Jennifer-b4e
      @Jennifer-b4e 10 days ago +1

      Agree, and glad someone else noticed.

  • @johnthompson7548
    @johnthompson7548 Month ago +3

    When empathy learns that you are not mentally mature enough or smart enough to be in a relationship with that empath, they start to go through the 5 stages of grief internally. Then give up on you.

  • @staceytrundley5166
    @staceytrundley5166 Month ago +8

    When the empath learns boundaries 🔥💋🦋

  • @lisaalum
    @lisaalum Month ago +34

    This is so true. Sadly, after 26 years and three kids, I hit the wall. And, my realization was “I am not safe.” Telling our friends is impossible. I just have to move forward one step at a time.

  • @debtasker6714
    @debtasker6714 Month ago +46

    Spot on! 60 years believing that I need to change. Believing that I'm taking on everyone's weight, merging into their emotion, trying to set up barriers, setting myself apart, exhausted by other's thoughts, not wanting to harm, just take on more. I joke that I should have been a bartender. Strangers tell me their personal stories, looking for support. I wish that I understood at 20 what this talk explains to perfection and Carl Jung had already documented. We have to make ourselves safe and happy first. That is not a selfish trait. It's the armor we need for survival. Our energy is highly valuable. Don't throw it away. Give with no strings attached. DO regulate who gets to benefit from it.❤ I broke away from a large group of individuals 15 years ago. Walked away, never looked back. I continue to cull out the takers. We don't have to always give to take the high road. When the shift finally happens, you are truly free. Enlightenment is your greatest gift to yourself. The only person holding me back was me......I just had to give myself permission.

  • @INFJ_SiGMA
    @INFJ_SiGMA Month ago +62

    All of this is true, but a part in this transition is the pain that comes with dismissing someone close. I have done this and most recently with a 20 year plus friendship, it is very painful. We can cut you off immediately or very slowly but there is hurt for us as well with the realization that all that time and energy invested, what you thought was impossible to end is done.

    • @PurpleandSeafoam
      @PurpleandSeafoam Month ago +10

      Same for me with my “best” friend, but in reality she wasn’t my best friend, I was hers. I came to realize over the last few years and a few incidents where she intentionally soft attacked me over something that really was minor but it was that she did it intentionally, kept at it and then when she realized she’d gone too far, claimed she’d apologized but in reality she’d only said that she was sorry I was upset not that she was sorry for what she’d said. I also FINALLY realized that I had been the one who did all the giving and going to visit after she moved to another state, that she hadn’t bothered to visit me, although she’d come back multiple times for other things and IF she had time I could go to wherever she was to visit. I realized that it had been like this the entire time. Yes it hurt, but only because I realized that there never had been a friendship really, at least not on her part. Your comment made me wonder if that was the case with your “friend” too?

    • @INFJ_SiGMA
      @INFJ_SiGMA Month ago +5

      @PurpleandSeafoam I believe it started out as a true friendship but we grow and change which I understand but to your point it has absolutely been one sided for most that time. You want them to care about you as much as you them but alas I finally learned that people arent like us and never will be. We have to lower our expectations of others because if we dont they will fail us every time. I am sorry about your loss and I do understand it.

    • @RavensBlood_66
      @RavensBlood_66 Month ago +5

      I also did this with a childhood friend.. In my mind, they crossed a bridge and I lit the match of a slow burn that there was no coming back from.. it was a lot of little things that led up to the end result..

    • @lani-s5y
      @lani-s5y Month ago +1

      How interesting, I'm A INTJ (same ish avenue) Wonder how many Empaths are INTJ & INFJ
      ??? hummmm 🤍🤍🤍

    • @INFJ_SiGMA
      @INFJ_SiGMA Month ago

      ​@lani-s5yI would guess almost all of us have strong empathetic feelings

  • @FoxyMoxy5314
    @FoxyMoxy5314 6 days ago +3

    I didn’t mean to click on this video, but what I heard in the first 20 seconds resonated with me so much that I stayed to listen. This is everything I’ve been feeling my whole life but could never find the words to explain it. I cried the whole way through reflecting on all the relationships with intimate partners, friends, and family; some current, some that I’ve walked away from, that all weigh so heavily on me and now I truly understand why.

  • @evebeaumont
    @evebeaumont Month ago +53

    I’d had enough, so I shut out the noise and decided I wanted to be alone for the rest of my life. My family wouldn’t leave me in peace, so I camped out in my car for three weeks, miles away from my hometown.
    One morning, a police officer knocked on my window and asked if I was okay. Apparently, the police had received a report that I was s*icidal. My family had taken my decision to distance myself as a cry for help and had put me on s*icide watch.
    I ended up having to go over all the family drama again and explain to to them that I simply wanted space before the officers were satisfied that I wasn’t a danger to myself, I was just simply avoiding the constant rigmarole by getting away from them all.
    This was 2 years ago, and I have never been happier, I know nothing about their lives and I am not curious to know, this has been the best decision of my entire life. People don't deserve you, they deserve each other.

    • @iheal-me
      @iheal-me Month ago +7

      I HEAR YOU! I HEAR YOU! ❤🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤🎉😅Hence the name....iHealMe!❤

    • @jessriggio2603
      @jessriggio2603 Month ago +4

      I relate to your story so much

    • @zamangiba888
      @zamangiba888 29 days ago +1

      This is amazing ✨
      I walk in your footsteps. Thank you for ushering the way 😊

    • @rubyrae55
      @rubyrae55 28 days ago +2

      Yep! I finally took space, got my hormones and nervous system balanced, developed boundaries….and my family and the network of people I’d trusted before I knew better all weirdly connected, filed missing persons reports for me, literally hunted me down…all saying I was on drugs and crazy. I was getting a legal name change…they plead to the court that I was mentally ill. My court advocate wasn’t allowed in a court room when I tried to file restraining orders against my family. I wound up finally getting a protected name change court order, then my nervous system fully gave out. I had a stress related heart attack (at age 33)…and even though I had a medical Durable power of attorney that barred my bio family from my care, they were contacted. Said I had schizophrenia instead if acknowledging my legal name change I hadn’t had time to get a new drivers license for…and I was thrown in inpatient psych care for 2 weeks with forced medication orders (shots of powerful drugs that wrecked me) until I called a friend who had a copy of my name change order (I knew I needed to put one somewhere safe with someone who could fax it…) at which point I was discharged after a few days and saddled with the debt of my torture. 5 years later, I am still recovering. I can’t get legal help because every law firm balks when I mention “psychiatric unit”….it’s cruel as hell. But I am finally safe, and finding myself again

    • @evebeaumont
      @evebeaumont 28 days ago

      @rubyrae55 Family are blood related, but that's all they are, they don't or won't understand you but they claim every ounce of the flesh they created. The joke is, they've declared they want some 'me time' on numerous occasions, but not when I said it, or when you said it. Good luck to you, stay safe and get well, that's yur priority.

  • @marcieotto8600
    @marcieotto8600 Month ago +17

    I told my sister decades ago that I was no longer a pawn on her chessboard but the queen on my own.
    I have eight siblings and an ex that I never realized because of how I grew up that they were all at different degrees of narcissism. It took me most of my life, I will be 70 in five months, what made me different from them was my ability for empathy. I struggled most of my life trying to figure it out.
    In 8th grade Health class, we were told that if you think everyone around you are crazy, look in the mirror, you are probably the crazy one. OMG! I am CRAZY! That was the hardest thing to ever overcome. I have always felt that I was the black sheep. I am now more than ok with being the black sheep.
    Having a strong sense of humor has helped me survive all of this.

    • @LucyDawson-e7i
      @LucyDawson-e7i Month ago +2

      I’m 74 and experienced it the same way. I feel for you.

    • @marcieotto8600
      @marcieotto8600 Month ago +1

      ​@LucyDawson-e7iwe should start a club. 🤪

    • @arthuritis4503
      @arthuritis4503 Month ago

      ​@marcieotto8600yes!! The 1956ers taking ownership of ourselves😂😂😂

    • @TessaMartinez-c7n
      @TessaMartinez-c7n Month ago +3

      I too am learning to accept my 'black sheepness'...
      I've always likened it to looking into a snow globe, I am on the outside looking in. . .

    • @mxmm5759
      @mxmm5759 10 days ago +1

      I'm an all around black sheep, but..in ways I feel so different. Like I'm proud of being a black sheep now. I'll be as black as they want, since I'm a mirror to them all..

  • @josebarrios4002
    @josebarrios4002 Month ago +7

    Forgiveness is complicity and we know it. This is why we never go back.

  • @Sad_Discoball
    @Sad_Discoball 24 days ago +3

    This guy knows EXACTLY what he's talking about.

  • @ginfogel7777
    @ginfogel7777 Month ago +27

    I can relate to this video on so many levels, but especially at 23 minutes in when he talks about how empaths will quietly come to a decision about a relationship. No fan fair, no announcements. They just do. I have reached that point in my marriage.
    I’m a 61-year-old empath married for 42 years to a covert narcissist. Believe me when I say when an empath draws the line, no one better cross it. It took many many years before the final line was drawn, and I gave many many warnings that this line was being approached. But once my husband crossed it, there was no turning back. The relationship dried up. I always tell my husband that he put out the fire by his own hand… He poured water on the flame of intimacy and passion, he jumped on it 100 times, he sat on it, he smothered it repeatedly… And once the flame is dead it is gone forever. And it’s funny how he still seems dumbfounded as to why the flame is dead! Clueless. Clueless. Clueless. I will also say that there could be multiple lines. Once the main line has been crossed, and you may decide to stay with that person for whatever reason, there could be new lines drawn, which can start a whole new cycle. Only the stupidest narcissist can cross that second line and maybe even the third line. Some people may argue that the empath that does this is just as stupid. But many people have different reasons for staying, in my case, I have a severely unstable cervical that will not allow me to live an independent life. So I am truly stuck. 😢

    • @Liberty40
      @Liberty40 23 days ago

      "A severely unstable cervical" ?? 🤔

    • @maisie2802
      @maisie2802 22 days ago

      cervical spine? I'm sad you married someone who is incapable of understanding your hurt. I hope you have good friends x

    • @DianeHarris-o8f
      @DianeHarris-o8f 14 days ago

      Yes, I too surely FEEL for you…😢 somehow, someway can you make a plan to get away? Call a mental health place in your city. Tell a professional what your situation is. It is important to be safe. Do you attend a church? Can your doctor refer you to a counselor? Interior withdrawal you have done, being in your “she cave,” you are doing. Again, make a plan starting NOW! This resonating deeply to me…married 43 years to a covert narc. End this relationship. Pray to the Lord for his help, his guidance. You don’t need to be stuck anymore. I divorced in ‘23 and am free, happy, yes, always healing. I WAS a super empath, needless to say. I am now 72. ❤’s Take little steps…again think of those who can be of help to you!!! You CAN!

    • @elisabeth432
      @elisabeth432 8 days ago

      @Liberty40 you are doing exactly what is described in the video. are you a narc by any 'chance'?

  • @Flowerpot24
    @Flowerpot24 Month ago +34

    I have cut out people from my life, no drama, no explanation I just stopped contacting them. Why, because they are takers they were draining me of my energy and I could no longer be connected to that negative energy.

  • @marylove909
    @marylove909 Month ago +14

    Holy crap I have never heard anyone describe my inner world and experience so accurately and completely.

  • @PurpleandSeafoam
    @PurpleandSeafoam Month ago +61

    One of the things that always hit me and one of the things that she did way too many times was her “apology” always was “I’m sorry you were offended or upset by something” not “I’m sorry I did that and it upset you and I won’t do it again”. She never apologized at all and, in fact, she would say that she said she apologized and why couldn’t I move on. It’s the “using” over and over again with the expectation that they can continue to keep using and abusing you. At some point the flip flipped and I just didn’t care anymore. She’d ask did I want to just end a decades long friendship? And I realized that in fact it hadn’t been a two sided relationship, it had been me doing all the giving and receiving nothing except scraps if it worked out for something she wanted or needed or had time for. That’s not friendship, that’s one person using the other’s friendship.

    • @Slightlysalty1
      @Slightlysalty1 Month ago

      Sounds like my 40+ year friendship. The last conversation we had I found myself apologizing for what she did and stopping mid-sentence. I said “No, not this time. I won’t apologize for the things you said to me.”
      Her with the same yeesh, you’re so sensitive. You know how I am.
      I do.
      It’s why I just can’t anymore.
      That hurt runs deep. I don’t want to excise people from my life.

    • @LeslieSoyster
      @LeslieSoyster Month ago +2

      Some of us realize they have never apologized for anything, despite many occasions of being insulting.

  • @LauraHennessy-j2h
    @LauraHennessy-j2h 27 days ago +4

    It's all closed windows and doors are boarded up & nailed shut. I am in survival mode

  • @Justmebeingoverit
    @Justmebeingoverit Month ago +8

    This is 1000% accurate. It’s called self preservation after far too many “jokes on you, you’re the problem, you’re too deep, you’re gaslighting me, you’re triggering me, you held a mirror to my bs, it’s all because of you, etc etc etc.

  • @lvmpie
    @lvmpie Month ago +39

    This is the first time i realized i am an empath!

    • @horsluva0758
      @horsluva0758 Month ago +4

      Glad you watched it
      I knew I was an empath as a child always labeled as too sensitive but knew who I was thank God 💞

    • @lvmpie
      @lvmpie Month ago +2

      ​@horsluva0758 is mostly that I just didn't understand what it means. I thought it was just a word for people with an abundance of compassion. I guess there's more to it than that!

    • @LuAnnJoyceThomas
      @LuAnnJoyceThomas Month ago +4

      Congrats! It probably suddenly answered a thousand questions for you! ❤

    • @lvmpie
      @lvmpie Month ago +1

      ​@LuAnnJoyceThomasit certainly did make things a lot clearer!

    • @MkBl-ll5zp
      @MkBl-ll5zp 29 days ago +1

      Welcome to our family!

  • @susanobrien125
    @susanobrien125 Month ago +7

    I find the hardest distancing is protecting myself from someone I love, especially a child (grown). When someone doesn't have respect for your essential life task you cannot do anything about the damage they can do. Even as a young child i knew what I knew. Now I am 75; it is still true. The loneliness is painful.

  • @LindyLooo99
    @LindyLooo99 Month ago +30

    TRUTH! You scream at me and put your bullshit off on me. If you project your mental illness onto me and try to humiliate me, you are GONE. So fast you will never know what happened. I confronted them with the truth and then blocked. 6 months before I began the process of stepping back until I saw things very clearly and POOF I was gone. LOVE that "CUT THE SOURCE"

  • @frantetro6728
    @frantetro6728 5 days ago +2

    I reached a point where I said , no more. And that was it

  • @truetexan8591
    @truetexan8591 24 days ago +2

    I finally realize what I am! My ex was infuriated that I wasn't crying, that I was silent, that I was calm.... He raged on, out of control, while I remained perfectly still and quiet. The prison camp is over. I don't even think about my ex anymore and he still tries to find ways to make me pay attention. Now I understand everything! Thank you!

  • @mikeflair6800
    @mikeflair6800 Month ago +18

    Empaths and female dogs get along best. Offer kindness and service to her, and she will stick to you like a piece of glue, and never, ever let you go

    • @cherylj8720
      @cherylj8720 Month ago +6

      I have shared my life with black labs...my current girl is my 3rd one. I also share my life with cats.

    • @arlene9993
      @arlene9993 Month ago +5

      This is a keen observation. I have four female pitties who were never expected to get along. We all understand one another and live as a pack. Their emotional devotion is extraordinary.

    • @elizabethpeterson56
      @elizabethpeterson56 Month ago +3

      empaths and cats as well. 19 yrs. we had babies together. she nursed when she saw me nursing. 😊

    • @LeeLaTejana
      @LeeLaTejana Month ago +1

      I have 2 female dogs and we all love, protect and trust each other. Dogs love reliable consistency and so do empaths. The love and bond is so deep, they never lie, cheat or steal from me. All the other men in my life were with me just to use me as a cover for who they really were. I have actually never been truly loved by any man ever.

    • @CherylMcNamee-r6l
      @CherylMcNamee-r6l Month ago +3

      ​@arlene9993 I have 2 Blue Heelers and a Jack Russel. All females. All my 58 years, I have bonded with dogs better than people. People have always hurt me. My dogs are more honest and kind than people. People have always labeled me too sensitive, and I guess I am. I have always hated being this way, it made me vulnerable. Though I find it is getting better with age. I can say "no" now, and put myself first. I don't have any friends but my dogs, I like it better that way. My youngest son ,who is 30 y/o is also an empath. It was painful to watch him go through it too. We are close because of it, I think. I don't hate being an empath anymore, it makes me human.

  • @wendydaniel1110
    @wendydaniel1110 Month ago +20

    Empaths become very unhealthy, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually and mentally when connected to Narcissist in any relationship family ,friend or workmate.. The void and emptiness of broken people are a high risk connection to the empaths safety and security.. These relationships should could come with a biohazard warning ⚠️

  • @MichaelMatthis8
    @MichaelMatthis8 Month ago +7

    Anyone who is watching these series of videos, Is truly a seeker of truth and self knowledge and a worthy human being. You should all give yoursleves a a giant applause. Kudos.

  • @nataliaprats2458
    @nataliaprats2458 Month ago +2

    Empaths are not doormats ready to be manipulated. This should be soooo easy to understand. And yet...

  • @asunder6797
    @asunder6797 Month ago +8

    Disappearing seems to happen without my permission. I am no longer authentically present and others around me know it but say nothing.

  • @gayleowens5057
    @gayleowens5057 20 days ago +3

    Spot on and thank you. You give and give and give and give until you cant. They expect you to give then unending chances and when you finally stop , they act hard done by and want YOU to apologise to them.

  • @ProudDad1976
    @ProudDad1976 Month ago +9

    Empaths and narcissists should never co-exist.
    I believe the two are complete opposites and if the narcissist is good at there evil they can destroy the empath if there is an emotional tie between the two like in my case where the covert narcissist is my transgender son.
    If someone you care about says you have done something wrong but refuse to tell you what it is but treats you like you are an evil person because of it, run!
    You have the right to stop the abuse, you are not guilty simply because you are a man or any other excuse used to control you. Do what you need to do, what you would normally and disappear!

  • @jamesbaker3313
    @jamesbaker3313 4 days ago +1

    As an empath this couldn’t be more true. I’d like people whom I have walked away from to hear this for understanding but I don’t want to be the one to share it with them.

  • @LisaVanVorous-y1z
    @LisaVanVorous-y1z 3 days ago +1

    You got this down in one. Luckily for the people... I don't lose my temper. I just stop caring. And silently plot my escape.

  • @doubled5383
    @doubled5383 Month ago +3

    It takes me literally 2 seconds to figure out if you are full of shit. It’s like a power that can be torture since so many people are full of shit.

  • @c1dv1c1ous
    @c1dv1c1ous Month ago +5

    5:47 I dealt with this too much growing up. It took me many years to find a way to communicate what was happening to me....even then after explaining it, people will still dismiss me. Sometimes I think its just better being alone.

  • @maggiemacdonald6024
    @maggiemacdonald6024 14 days ago +4

    This is so true. I can walk into a room, a group of people, a circle of friends and feel every one's energy. Be it good or bad. It's draining to be at a birthday party, or a night with friends/neighbors; I need a day alone to regroup. Or be in nature feeding my ducks ( sssoooo peaceful) down at the canal. People wonder why I don't always participate every day .
    I live in an Assisted living facility and am around many different types/ personalitiesof people, and even going to the dining room for meals or participating in activities, sitting outside with a lot of very different opinions sucks the energy right out of me. I then need alone time, sometimes for 2 days.
    I try to explain but no one really understands...one resident ( ( véry opinionated) states "she is, and everyone else is" an empath.
    It's really, really, hurtful and frustrating when they think I'm a freak for having big connections to the wildlife here (ducks, bunnies, cranes, soft shell turtles, lizards...it doesn't matter), I talk to them, spend more then I can afford on nutritious foo for them,, name them ...it makes me feel so at peace being around them, away from people, having them trust me....and I know I am SSSSOOO rambling but just getting it off my chest. Sorry to anyone taking the time to read this.
    I've always been an empath since I was a child, but never knew I was different until I grew up. A friend told me 25 years ago I was an empath. I had no clue what he meant.
    Now I do, and just trying to get a better understanding what I am.
    I also like storms, I'm sitting outside in a pretty decent wind storm right now, and loving the sounds and motions if the treat, and the wind on my face. It's peaceful for me.
    Anyone want to weigh in and let me know if I'm a nut job, please do so 🙏

    • @CarilynnSuzanne
      @CarilynnSuzanne 15 hours ago

      Maggie you seem like a wonderful beautiful soul, never ever change! The animals and nature appreciate you, too. ❤… and you are definitely NOT a nut job. ✨✌🏼

  • @GenXgranny
    @GenXgranny 20 days ago +2

    When I'm done all you will get from me is a prayer for the peace you obviously need.

  • @figment3242
    @figment3242 29 days ago +4

    An empath can walk into a silent room, then pick out and sit next to a depressed person and ask what’s wrong? 1:44 yes as an empath ive reached this point, and just never call or show up again.

  • @ligeiaztomb2755
    @ligeiaztomb2755 Month ago +4

    I have said to people many many times, I KNOW when you are lying....I just don't always say it. People laugh, or they don't believe me. Then they lie to me again in the future, and then tell me that they aren't (another lie).
    I never forget these moments.
    I definitely file it.....and just as this video has said, one day you are out of my life because I am DONE WITH YOU.

  • @JoSpring
    @JoSpring Month ago +3

    We are good at cutting off people who don't deserve us without guilt.

  • @Sydney-y4d
    @Sydney-y4d Month ago +12

    Empaths feel EVERYTHING. They feel your feelings, the feeling of who you talk about, their own feelings and how you feel about them. When someone speaks from intellect alone, divorced from their feelings it has 0 meaning. Feelings are the carrier wave for all human communication.

  • @GaelSharah
    @GaelSharah 3 days ago +1

    Comfortable only when alone.

  • @NotetoSelf-1
    @NotetoSelf-1 12 days ago +1

    Where have you been all my life? I’m the girl you’re talking about… Thank you for affirming what my gut has been telling me my whole life! I am wonderfully empathetic and wouldn’t change that for the world! ♥️♥️♥️

  • @kimberlyraz6343
    @kimberlyraz6343 Month ago +4

    It is validating to hear said what it took me many years to allow myself to believe. At 52, I am finally in control of my emotional environment and I am healing. I grieved the lack of someone I could truly be myself with, always feeling alone in relationships....family, friends, boyfriends. I always felt I had to water my true self down because the full power of who I am was always too much for others to take. I always felt like there was something wrong with me. Only when I finally let go of the expectations of being understood and accepted by others and put myself first in my life have I felt peace. I am safe with me. I am happy being with me.

    • @sarahdaigle6695
      @sarahdaigle6695 11 days ago

      good to know i'm not alone but wait..... I still am... I feel ya, thanks for sharing.

  • @angelicatorres8108
    @angelicatorres8108 Month ago +3

    So true
    We grieve and let go before we leave