thanks for telling bens story. my mom committed suicide when i was 11 and it broke my heart. I started to make a living of skateboarding 12 years later and been experiencing panic attacks after that which also led to suicidal thoughts. i went looking for help and I‘ve been free from these dark thoughts for a long time now. Its important open up and talk. Don’t hesitate to reach out to a friend or doctor. Rest in peace Ben
Thank you for sharing Jonny, my dad did the same when I was the same age as you. Always so many unanswered questions, just keep spreading love, compassion, empathy, and joy as much as possible everyday. Much love brother.
My little brother went from the average scooter kid to a force to be reckoned with in our local skate community within the span of 2 years. Unfortunately he unexpectedly lost his battle with depression on February 28th. Rest easy little homie, I love you and can’t wait to rip together again one day.
I think this is a big problem with alot of people. They just can't seem to handle being alone and in their head. You have to be strong mentally. Alcohol will just compound it too. He was self medicating hard core.
His sister mentioned it with her story, and I think it's a small key: Make the appointment for them. Don't think that your friend or family member will follow through with getting help on their own, even if they say they are going to do so. That can be the hardest part, making the first appointment and speaking to a professional, and people with severe depression/anxiety will often make any excuse not to, and think they can fix things on their own (knowing from experience).
They are sick; they can't/won't do it for themselves. And don't give up! Even if it takes a hundred attempts, keep reaching out, keep trying until they get the help they need.
as some one who's mother made this call. i am so happy she made that choice it didnt help me personally but knowing they care means more then anything i have
"There's the selfish part of me that wants Ben here because he's my friend and I like him." That's not selfish dear. That's missing and loving your friend. I'm so sorry for your loss. Love and condolences to all of Ben's family and friends. I hope he's found the peace he couldn't find💗🙏🏽
shes telling you something about what probably happened irl. making a documentary for money is quite selfish. humans cannot think very well or often. they always tell you whats going on in their tiny minds because there simply is nothing else going on
It is selfish though. The person died a young tragic death, he wants to bring them back just because he misses him. No other reason, not because he wants him to enjoy life again or smile again that's the only reason he wrote for his Gain. Very self fish. But it's human.
"It's a lovely day. The birds are singing, the sun is shining, what more could you ask for?" Ben had such a beautiful soul. I watched his videos growing up following Enjoi. While he may not be here ripping the concrete jungle, he's left a piece of himself that will be carried by the skateboarding community forever.
Yep, that is why blading and boarding should drop the hate. blading is back in huge way with covid and we all need to embrace the lose to skating in all forms. RIP BEN.
@@Habeev07 I don’t think skaters really hate fruit-booters anymore dude. At least you guys had some level of skatepark etiquette. The kids on scooters with the attention spans of goldfish are the enemy now 😂
@@Bradmhj there is a mental health crisis in the west. they been savage passive agressive manioulators for centuries. an a few of us will do anything to get away from them. they beat blind belief an obediance in you at birth an mutilate you at birth for the same purpose. then if we do exit we cant ever talk about how the people who come out to claim they miss us are part of the reason we want to die. so many things. you people should be smart enough by 30 to realize when a f3m talks shes probably not telling you the truth of much
I dont even know who this guy was but I'm crying for him! It's sad that he's gone he seemed like a great spirit! I empathize with losing someone to soon, but just talking about them keeps them alive. Remember the greatness!
Same. Here’s the thing though. I’m a firm believer most good spirits leave this realm quickly. Those who have soul searching still left to do will remain. 🤷🏼♂️ only thing I’ve witnessed happening throughout my life.
This story hit me super hard. My mom committed suicide almost 3 months ago. It was the hardest day of my life. And to hear Bens sister talk, i understand everything she is saying. I myself was "suicidal" at one point. Never understood what they meant when they said it was selfish. After my moms death, it changed the way i look at life. I got the suicide awareness symblom tatted on me now. Im not religious, but i hope one day i can see my mom again. And i hope anyone going through any death can find peace, like im trying to find.
I was alone on my 18th bday at Sunnyvale skatepark Ben & Louie helped push start my car when it wouldnt start. They made sure i was smiling regardless of knowing what i was going through.. never saw these boys without a smile on
So sad, I currently suffer from depression and just started skating again at the age 54, it really helps me each day. Never knew this young guy but my heart goes out to his family and friends
sir keep doing what you love I encourage you to find meditation and surpass the demonic thoughts that we have. I'm sorry to read that, but I hope you can get better help with the assistance of those you love: always speak, don't be afraid or ashamed to do it
I'm gonna give my homies flowers from now on cause we are always blooming and blossoming with new things in life. That is the growth we must appreciate, the growth that occurs in the good and in the bad. Live it up amongst the seasons, my friends! : , )
…… we all have issues to some degree. Too bad military funding takes so much of our tax dollars away which would be better spent on our citizens. Rip sir.
I’ve never heard of Ben but I was led to this video for a reason , everyone out there struggling with mental health just know you are never alone there are many people here that want to hear your voice and feel your feelings.
... sadly some people can never be saved ... I admire the sentiments made in this story ... however, the medical profession poorly understand both the brain and how emotions actually work ... it's tied to the consciousness, mind and body problem, which is insanely difficult to comprehend ... I've been dealing with traumatic grief for twenty years and still discovering how much psychiatry poorly understands the grief response ... I would add that close contacts should realise that drinking alcohol is not a panacea ... and neither is professional medication for these issues ... alcohol is the most socially damaging drug on the planet. I would not be surprised if Ben's so called "friends" also played an influential role in heavy drinking sessions and not knowing Ben's history of family dysfunction, would be a recipe for disaster ...
@@dn1697 i dont admire jack squat. when you die anyone can say anything. your worst enemy can make a documentary telling the world how much they loved you. in fact if someone killa you they will indeed tell the world how sad they are an how close you were cause they know you wont say jack sheet an dont want the blame.
I don't think that's the main issue regarding depression or even one at all it can be I suppose but it's more like a brain disease atleast that's how I'd describe it what other people think doesn't really affect me it's what I think I could have all the support in the world doesn't make any difference
As a guy you can’t talk about what you really feel. You’re weak, you’re not allowed to have emotions. No such thing as ups and downs. I know it’s not true but it certainly feels that way. Thanks for bringing light to this. I can completely relate to this.
When did he die? Yes, a home without a father makes the children something like 80% more likely to end up addicted, in prison, or dead, most of the time all 3. This, amongst other reasons, is the main reason black culture has been so destroyed. When a father doesn’t stay in a home, especially for a son, that child is spiritually and emotionally fragmented and will rebel and act out
@@mamahuevo359 yes, pretty much every community has this problem if they’re poor, except really the Asian community. Their culture is surrounded by honor and family tradition, no matter how poor they get, they keep their family tight. That’s one of the big reasons they work so hard and do so well in school, they don’t have an option to not most times, that’s just what it is. If there are no values around keeping a mother and father together for their children, and we let the government incentivize single parent house holds for a bigger check every month, well continue to see a cycle of addiction, mental illness, criminal activity, and death. Life is hard enough, every child deserves a mother and father to instill values in them, or we end up having broken children creating more broken children and the cycle can only become worse
@@Willyk200921 this sir is some of the most true things I have ever heard, and you speak it with professionality really gets you thinking, thank you for this comment. As someone your speaking of this is very true, mostly for all communities/ethnicities.
@@barebonesjones yes sir, just don’t let anyone tell you there’s no difference between a man and woman. Because what they want to say is that there’s no God, that we weren’t created, and that’s so far from true. We were created by a loving God and He made man and woman perfect for one another with unique qualities, specific to the sex. A man needs to be a man, and the children he has need him regardless of what corporate media says. The science says it all
I feel like most of the time the closest people always say, "Oh you arent gonna do that." Which clearly shows how naïve some people can be to the pain a human can suffer from. I feel for the family and closest friends. Nothing hits harder then finding out some news like this..... RIP Ben
I had a dear friend James, who I befriended on the streets of South Beach, who I lost to a heavy Xanax addiction the same day Kobe also passed, that so happened to be laced with fentanyl. He was such an incredible skateboarder and he had bliss and peace on his board. It was so evident how much he loved it. I am naming my son in his honor, whenever I have him. I miss you so much J
As a recovering heroin addict and skateboarder. I can’t agree more when it comes to have structure and a schedule. I’ve made the choice of working 7 days a week because of that reason. Work, skate, and recover. Thats what I do. This video hit me hard
@@chuck6033 “'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a Hope and a Future. '” - Jeremiah 29:11. God see’s you and he loves you.
The stigma associated with mental illness is astounding. Like it’s a real issue that needs more attention. Edit: changed “health” to “illness”. Thankfully someone pointed out my mistake in saying that.
Thank you for sharing Ben’s story…I ve suffered most of my life with severe clinical depression and anxiety. Suicidal Ideations, plans…..I’m a survivor of an attempt…….you just never know the struggles one may be going through in their own head….it’s a scary place in there at times….but it’s scarier when those thoughts bring a sense of peace, which is when I know that I need to get it together….it’s a constant struggle to want to want to live…..that is difficult for those who have never suffered with mental illness to comprehend. Mental health is SO important……here’s to taking it day by day, sometimes hour by hour……🖤
You have totally been missing out Girl! Jesus is here and has been here waiting for you all along! Come to Him. Call on Him. He hears you but you need to call His NAME for HELP. His name is JESUS. "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved" (Romans 10:13). I DARE YOU! GO AHEAD AND TRY HIM. You will be blessed. Be blessed by these words. Jesus loves you 😊.
“'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. '” - Jeremiah 29:11. I pray you Gavin, accept Jesus love. Amen.
Is there anything you have done or that you currently do that makes things easier for you? To stop feeling the emptiness or whatever it is that makes us feel that way?
There is love out there for you, your worth is always more than you think - there’s no pressure to be anyone but yourself, please stay positive. We all have struggled, some days are tougher than others but you are making the world a better place.
Hey you matter okay. If I can do it so can you! Just gotta keep pushing through everyday. The more you stay positive and keep going it’ll get a little easier everyday. Life’s worth it. Pick yourself back up everyday. You’re not alone.
Hello, @VICE . I've been skating for 5 years and also happen to be a psycho therapist in southern Taiwan. I was so touched by this video and Ben's story. I want to spread the message to our skating community as well here in Taiwan to help raise awareness about mentle health. I wonder if there are ways for me to add Chinese subtitles to this? I hope this message get to someone.
I feel so very sad. My sons are 18 and 20 both skaters one more than the other and he struggles at times and I am so proud at the strength he has shown to get through what he has been through. I couldn’t live without either of my boys. My love for them is bigger than me. To those of you who are at this difficult age, your mind is tricking you into thinking distorted thoughts, it’s not the truth and you will get through it. There is so much to live for so much to see and do! We get on chance and once we go that’s it lights out. I pray for all of you struggling out there if anyone needs someone to talk to I’m here for you! Reach out. Please. Xxx
Yep, that is why blading and boarding should drop the hate. blading is back in huge way with covid and we all need to embrace the lose to skating in all forms. Brink - soul skaters
Well to be fair, a lot famous celebrities commit suicide and some of them have family, including children. The most famous was.. What was his name again.. A comedian who voice the genie in Aladin.. And the drummer from Linkin Park. What we should do is find the cause that lead them to the no return path. Same goes for mass shooters. I remember it always start with bullying and toxic environments where you feel like you're all alone.
Keep doing whatever it takes to get through life. That’s it. Unfortunately psyche meds can create a litany of worse problems, as I’m sure you know, but they’re sometimes a necessary solution for a desperate situation.
This is why we need good fathers around. If you're a dad, be the best you can for your children. Be there. If you're a wife/partner, be good to men. We have issues, too, and we need love just as much.
Im no skater but i cried my way through this video because it resonated with me. My mom took an overdose when i was 5 months old leaving me and my brother with a depressed father with anger issues. Throughout my life i've been struggling with anxiety, depression, as well as suicidal thoughts. I'm getting the help i need now in the form of therapy and medication. Skipping the booze also helped. Alcohol is a nice temporary anxiety relief that made mefeel united with my friends, but drinking only created more in the end (atleast for me). Do you want to help a suffering friend? Make that call you have been thinking about. Take your friend out for a walk, a meal, a chat, invite him/her over or whatever. When you have suicidal thoughts you lose touch with reality, you are powerless against your thought patterns, meaning that someone from the outside need to interfere. Make that call, or else, one day it might be too late.
Well your father would easily develop those issues from that experience, if anything I would advise getting into a sport that you can love and meeting people. Brains need stimulation and so any reasonable amount of exercise is a good thing to feed some healthy chemicals in there, start small and build up, it's not about willpower as much as a healthy habit, plus a change of scenery is nearly always good for the soul.
Sometimes you need to listen to your gut when you feel like someone is truly sad. It's hard to approach us, but any smile we receive can be the spark, that helps to light the fire that keeps the demons away.
no. you 🌈 girls today dont understand how males act an think. littlerly. your society is out of touch with reality an all have been feminized. cept the females who have half way turned to the males. estrogen actually seems to hinder thought an critical thinking so they have never understood tho we can describe them. so my first part is semi inaccurate
Having lost a sibling to suicide, this hits close to home. It's easy to say in hindsight that all the signs were there, but in the moment you tend to overlook them, either out of embarrassment or an aversion to having an uncomfortable talk with that person. But it's critical to have that level of trust and communication, so that when your friend, partner, or sibling does express their feelings and well-being, that they feel heard and not like they're being a burden on someone else. We've all had that reluctance to ask for help when we clearly need it, and to ask for help is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of courage and willpower. It's encouraging to see the skateboarding community rally around the cause. I hope the boost in awareness leads to greater mental health and assistance for anyone struggling.
Hello beautiful, I hope you had a good day today, as it was a new day and the sorrows and scars of yesterday can be healed with love and time and patience and control of the heart and the mind. If you need help with managing the feelings of trying to cope with the loss of a loved one please do not hesitate to reach out to a professional *therapist* that can help you hone your ability to manage such tragedy's. I hope you can heal given enough time and support. All the best. Your friend.
I AM IN THIS BOAT AT THE MOMENT, i have asked for help from family and friends, i am a single dad and thats the only thing keeping me going, i know i am struggle internally and its fucking hard. but if he can make our name can live on and he is happy. i hope i cant push on till then.
I'm 28 years old, I skate, and I thought of suicide and had, in my past, sincerely wanted to do suicide. Just seeing the title of the video and watching the first few seconds and thinking (and tearing for some seconds), I could've been gone if I followed through with that mentality. It gets so dark and cold to where you stop feeling the sadness and you go into a mad state of mind, mad as in like not in-tune with how people can really be there for you, and they do care. When you start opening up a bit to see people do care, it destroys that false reality of a cold, dark mindset. To do the action beyond this point is to say there is no hope. People get afraid to be in the spotlight, even in the smallest of situations, and they contemplate and makes them very sad they can't function. This is me, but I know what we experience is common with a lot of people and once you see we all go through the same things, you can begin to shine light on the realities of the world to where it can even brighten your day and others. The people going through these suicidal phases of thought, are the sincerest people in the world that they would hold beliefs so strong in a reality, but to not manifest those values across society, we lose an important portion of understanding and beauty of life. To say they're mentally ill in the process of getting out of this dark phase in their life, is an insult to the constitution of the realities of the beauty of all that we have. You don't tell someone "Get help" or "you need help", or "you need to talk it through". They understand this already. In fact, they see more value than you to be in that intense of a despair in life. They should be valued and esteemed highly, not condemned like they were simply in a tough time. Half the people that say they're depressed, don't even know what depression is. To me, in my experiences, it's a huge loss of love. They seek to fill that void. When it's not being met, they hold value because they see what needs to be done for the resolution. This is why we should value them greatly. They hold great paths for society. This is why it's so indescribably sad when someone does suicide. What happened? We missed the whole point.
I struggle with drinking myself and it seems like a really hard way to go. I made the choice a few weeks ago to stop. I’ve slipped up like 10 times but this last time was so painful the next day. It’s almost like alcohol itself makes me quit because it’s so damn rough on the body. Alcoholism is a rough way to go
You never know what the other person is struggling with. To say “he had the life” isn’t fair. You just never know what it is going on, we are are just having a human experience, just do your best to listen to your friends, really listen. Skate in Peace Ben.
You’re right. People can continue to give you bullet points as to how and why your life is good, but they won’t ever know your true emotions and feelings deep down. For many kids, they learn throughout their life to hide the pain of not having parents. It makes them angry inside to see other people with loving families but they feel like God or someone made them devoid of it. It takes a true mentor to guide a kid successfully through life, which I’m assuming he never really had. It seemed like he never had someone tell him what to do.
Life's a struggle for sure , I'v had the same thoughts many a times . Lived the whole drug booze skate buzz for years . I'm addicted to fps shooters online and at 43 now I honestly can say I'v had it with life , I'm just so tired with myself . But I do have people around me that I care for and they care for me . I guess they give me something to live for . I got bells palsy which paralyzes half on ya face and I suffer from dry eye disease from it with is a real challenge each day I wake up , feels like I'm hell . I guess I kinda like myself to some degree . People need to tell people how they feel . I also suffered from hearing voices in my head from too much drinking . Drugs n booze are the true mind killers and negative people
No more weed drugs or alcohol in skate culture. We get one mind. If people can't understand taking mind altering substances is a bad thing well I just don't know what to say. Smoking weed is not cool and it never will be. 😔
This really got me. I lost my dad to suicide in 2010. It was myself who found him. I’ve blocked it out and never really dealt with it but this really got me. So glad something so good and positive and full of hope was able to come from such a tragic event. Ben seemed like such an amazing person it’s brilliant to see his memory being shared by so many people for such a good cause.
I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. As a person that struggles with mental health issues, it's a very different way we see the world. I hope that he is somewhere peaceful. Rest in peace.
Lost my Sister to suicide last year. I’ve struggled with depression my whole life, my skateboard and fly rod are what always bring me back to center. Life is hard, but beauty, wonder and happiness can often be restored with perseverance. That being said, no one can ever completely understand what it’s like to live within the confines of someone else’s mind. Thanks for your contribution to skateboarding and to the world overall Ben, travel well.
. "That being said, no one can understand what it's like to live within the containers of someone else's mind" so very very true. You never know what someone else is going through and when you see there highs you often don't know anything about their lows. Be a good a friend to yourself and spend time with people you care about. Best wishes my friend
@@latricer6686 mine are good, I take a D supplement. My brain is just wired wrong and I auto default to dark thoughts. I’ve been proactive and made strides in treating and thinking better of myself. It’s a constant struggle, but there is a lot of good in my life. One day at a time.
Never knew or heard of This Man but I can relate. I haven’t been able to shake off my thoughts of “ending” for sometime now. Rest In Peace Ben, your story is touching to a fellow suffer.
3 weeks ago, I lost my brother due to complications with liver failure/drinking heavily for nearly a decade. A bitter pill to swallow, and there's the lingering feelings you "should have done more" or "could have set him on a better path" but you can't do that without the person wanting to. He was a bright, vibrant person with many talents - a great and witty writer and a musician but he seemingly gave up trying to fix his demons of his past (An absent father during his early years). He was 36, and I had visions of getting old and grumpy with him, playing backgammon weekly and listening to music like we did years ago. That reality isn't available for him. If you're feeling like falling into the void, please find someone to talk about it with - It must be incredibly difficult to do this first step, but there are always people who love and cherish you and want to help.
I’m sorry 😢 for your loss! You didn’t cause it, you couldn’t control it, and you couldn’t cure it. The disease of addiction is really traumatizing. I pray you never blame yourself.
I remember when this happened shortly after watching KoTR and seeing how happy he seemed, only to get this crushing news a short time later. My condolences and prayers continue to go out to the family and friends of Ben🙏🏼
@@robheffernan everyone's perception of God is different. If a soul cries for another we should let them pray to that end. Just because Christians used others affinity to 'god' as a means to control, doesn't mean others pray under the same intention. Don't let your anger tarnish the meaning behind someone else's message.
@@DScapo0 I firmly believe it is offensive to tell ones family that their prayers are with them, when it is the god they are praying to that let this happen. What a thug this god is. Oh, and my "anger" - I'm just pumped by the fact this god business is going down the toilet as more and more people have access to FACTS.
It's always the people that try to please everyone else first that end up dying well before their time should be up. During that KoTR it seemed like he was there to make everyone else smile first. It's such a sad thing to lose someone so young to something that could have been prevented. He was a great skater but the way everyone else has described him since his passing says he was just a beautiful human in general.
Thank you for sharing this piece. Ben’s sister is a living tribute to her brother and I hope she continues to work on her own mental health as an ode to her love for him.
Oh my gosh. This just showed up in my feed out of nowhere. About ten years ago I met this guy at the airport in SF and we had a really long and lovely chat about Suffolk and skating. We had a lot in common. It was a really explosive and energised conversation between two really excitable people, I remember, but we never got to exchanging names. I never forgot this encounter and ten years later I stumble across this and it turns out it was Ben. This is so devastating. My heart goes out to his loved ones. Thank you so much for telling his story.
Hold onto yourself. Hold on to what greatness is to come. Hold onto intellect, being wise will take you far in life. Hold on to possibilities, the possibility of becoming greater than the person you were yesterday. Hold on to peace, inner peace shall liberate you. All these things come from within an individual. It's the power of us. Soon you'll be so strong, others will want to lean on you.
@@Andu_music right. I wanted to be an actress but I know that it'll destroy me. And I would be in a very darker place because of the judgement, criticism, looks, age, etc. Things I have no control over but yet everyone will drop me because of it...can't deal with that and I refuse to deal with that. But you're right, it's harder to hold onto inner peace when there is so much chaos around you. Especially in the entertainment industry.
We just need to look out for everyone and each other. People are very good at hiding their emotions and only talking with them can you truly understand what they are going through. May Ben Rest in Peace
Most people have their own problems to deal with. i know this is gonna seem kinda selfish, but i cant afford to deal with other people's problems, while im still dealing with mine, and my family's.
@@suckmyballzgameplays7172 you can only help others once you've helped yourself. I know for a fact I won't be able to help anyone because I'm so low and depressed, it wouldn't help. Don't feel selfish about it, if you can't help others there is other ways you can help.
@@rubytuesday7716 if someone doesn't believe you and is dismissive of your feelings you should seek people who will listen if you can or especially a therapist if you can. It's a very relatable problem because those closest to you are often the ones who hear your problems the most so they might think you're actually fine. I have the same problem because I seem very happy go lucky and inevitably go out of my way to seem happy or say I'm okay when I really don't know. It can be very difficult but I hope you're doing well today friend.
This hit so hard and I know that crying is good. Suicidal thoughts do meander and I always ask myself why do they surface. It's because they're trapped in my mind. It is a big relief to let someone know that you are not okay
In you didn't see this video (or a similar video) sooner, and possibly caught on to some of the signs/symptoms in your friend, and maybe you could have helped him get help
"A drunk man tells no tales" bless his heart he only had the courage to tell them ALL he needed help while drinking but they all blamed the drinking as temporary feelings..
It's so refreshing to hear that there are so many in a similar boat. On the other hand, It's also very sad. I'm just glad we can talk openly about this now, it's definitely a step in the right direction. For a long time the skate community has just pushed their feelings aside and ended up making things worse. That's why it gives me hope knowing this open discussion about the links between skateboarders and trauma, head injuries, anxiety, depression etc. is quite common now
When my son was about 11 years old he entered a Jaycee Relay Race. He’d never ran track before and didn’t know everybody wore shorts. He came in jeans, to everyone’s amusement. He ran the last leg for his team - and came away the fastest runner of the day, and made up considerable distance to win. This video made me think of that day. How I wish I had been able to see it, instead of only hear and read about it. I was a single mom and had to work. My son was an amazing athlete. ❤️
Single parents hold the world on their shoulders. It isnt just two times as hard parenting alone, it more like ten times. That is such an awesome story of your child. It helps me to remember to cherish every single moment i have with my children. We are blessed and truly lucky to have these moments with one another. Thank you
I really appreciate Vice for telling a bit of his story. It brought me to tears because I've been hiding my thoughts since I was 9yrs Old and I can understand both sides listening to this.
Jesus loves you. He knows how you feel. Won't you share it with Him? He really cares. Give Him a chance. "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved" (Romans 10:13). If you try Jesus, YOU WON'T REGRET IT. TRUST THAT. Be blessed by these words.
I am an avid mental health awareness advocate and spoken word performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my RUclips channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. ❤️
I can really imagine the alcohol did not help with his anger and unwanted emotions. When you suffer lack of control in any manner mentally, emotionally or physically alcohol can really exacerbate the lack of control and ones problems. Then the alcohol becomes the tool needed to control and keep yourself together but it’s a ticking bomb because your problems dont get better and over time you become unable to deal with your issues without alcohol and it becomes a much greater struggle because you have all these problems and nothing helps and you become so overwhelmed that you can’t handle it. RIP Ben I pray God had a special place for you in his Garden and that your in peace now and no longer suffering. I am a survivor of suicide and it really makes me sad and pain inside to hear of someone losing their life’s to suicide. If you suffer or know someone who suffers mental illness or have or know someone with issues with suicidal feelings or thoughts please please reach a hand out for help and try to do what you can to get help for yourself or your loved one. Sometimes support from a loved one or stranger even can change a persons life. Take care all of you and I pray God Blesses all of you always. Peace to all and all in peace!!
Thanks for sharing Ben's story.. its heartbreaking for everyone involved.. such a sad story but he had a great group of friends and his beautiful sister just want to send you a hug 💗 may his beautiful soul rest in peace x
I can relate to this guy. I have been having mental issues ever since I was a child. Depression, OCD, going through a trauma, feeling disconnected from the world around you, feeling like you don't belong anywhere you go, I went into an addiction that was worsening and I was going deeper into abyss of the nightmare created by my own mind. Countless times I was contemplating suicide and was feeling absolutely hopeless. I'm really glad I did not. I got sober and started doing things in life that make me happy and feel proud of what I do. It keeps me grounded although I still sometimes have outbreaks of anxiety and panic attacks, I sometimes would wake up and my heart pounding like crazy and I feel like I'm dying. I come down, meditate and things get better. Suicide is never a solution to the problem
@@oswaldjames6295 Orthomolecular/Alternative Drs. treat depression using NUTRITION - which is a SCIENCE - food allergies can make one suicidal as well - these Drs. take a stool sample & urine/blood - they check for CANDIDA/FUNGUS overgrowth in bloodstream/bowel.. there are many books written about candida and how to lessen its effect - diet/antifungals - they also check for parasites - again if you do have them you need to do a cleanse - also heavy metal cleanse - food allergies checked - nutritional deficiencies checked - and VERY IMPORTANT - get your THYROID CHECKED.. when going too slowly it can cause awful symptoms of depression - along with more symptoms.. also get it checked for HASHIMOTO'S THYROIDITIS.. IT SWINGS BOTH WAYS.. HYPER AND HYPOTHYROID.. NOT FUN.. WHEN THYROID OFF YOU GET PANIC ATTACKS.. also must take essential fatty acids for brain function - heart function and hormonal function.. Knowledge is power..Good Luck to Everyone suffering from depression..
Yes, suicide is never a solution BUT JESUS IS. Try Jesus. Give Him a chance. Call on His Name and WATCH HIM DELIVER YOU. HE CAN DO IT. I KNOW HE CAN. HE DID IT FOR ME AND MANY OTHERS. Come to Him and SEEEE.. Be blessed by these words. Jesus loves you 😊.
It’s so hard when someone is super social and loves being with others but has problems like this because they lose a lot more when they withdraw into depression- it takes you from your friends and makes it so hard to be alive. Also it’s really hard to lose a brother, especially one you felt responsible for because you must feel that guilt even more in addition to feeling like you’ve lost a friend.
Anti depressants have done wonders for me. I feel robbed of an entire life, not knowing that normal people get to live this happy. Along with therapy, vulnerability, communication and different forms of self love and healing, I now want to be here. As a fellow man and skateboarder, I feel you. You're not alone. People want you alive. I promise
To his sister, our pursuers are with you and THANK YOU FOR DOING SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF, AND OTHERS. It’s a wonderful gift to help even one family avoid having to deal with that, and i believe you are helping many…which is such an amazing thing to give. We love you!
If you're struggling with mental health I know it feels extremely lonely but only when you talk about it will you know that others are facing the same demons.You matter.You are important. You are valid. Please don't leave us.
This video really hits hard. Such a tragic story but at the same time inspiring and puts the message across insanely well. Keep skating up there ben mate ❤
Thank you for saving lives!♥️ I lost my close friend to suicide 7 years ago, he was a skater as well. Shame kills so many of us. Especially men that are told not to be emotional. Being emotional is who we are as people and I wish we could all accept it. Me and most of my friends have some kind of emotional issues, I struggled most of my life with severe CCPTSD. What saves my life in moments of struggle is people around me who I can tell how I feel without judgement. I’m sad for every life stolen to suicide but hoping we can all change it with small gestures of support and love towards each other. Sending lots of love from London ♥️♥️♥️🍀
You can tell Ben and his sister have such amazing souls rest in peace Ben and to the sister thank you for being such an inspiration to so many hurting souls out there
Sending love to Ben and everyone. I have definitely experienced suicidal thoughts. They come and go. I'm 41. Some days are tougher to get through, but life is beautiful. I want to be here to see it all. The good, bad and the ugly. Rip Ben ❤
I pray you do Stefan. I pray you know truly receive Jesus love. God is Love and He want us to have His love in us. Isaiah 49:15 “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!” You are not forgotten but are a treasure to God Almighty! Romans 5:8-9 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him!”
It's awesome to see the skateboarding community, one I've been a part of for the last 36 years, come out for mental health awareness. I had a tough upbringing, I lost my mom to aggressive cancer at 19 and was diagnosed with severe Bipolar Disorder among other things at 21. I spun out of control for many years. It sounds so fucking cliché and I hate it, but skateboarding did save my life. Just pushing around town and bombing hills got me through some really difficult times. Skateboarding is something that is very special.
I had never really watched much of bens skating, but he was always one of my favorite skaters because of his personality, and the way he came off as someone you wanna be around. Along with making it seem like he was what a skater should be, and that’s to have fun with your friends and ENJOI yourself. Now knowing since his passing I’m not the only one hiding behind camaraderie which coming from a 17 year old should say something for anyone who believes that just because someone is a kid that they don’t feel stressed, or anxious, and of course as well as suicidal. Because as a kid trying to talk about it, people brush it off as “your just a kid”, “you don’t know stress yet”, or “what do you have to be sad about” or quiet honestly the toughest one “suck it up”. That’s not really easy when the bottle of emotions is already at its brim for a lot of people who tend to bottle things up. Rest In Peace Ben, gonna go out and skate for you today
I've been struggling with burnout recently and have been in a very dark state for some time now. I can't imagine what Ben was going through though, considering how bad it got for him. A lot of the signs he was exhibiting has kind of shook me up a bit, and I'm very thankful that you guys shared his story. Mental health is an extremely important and severely under addressed topic in our society. Stay safe and look out for yourself, friends
I understand burnout. I've been dealing with that in the last 4 months or so. I was in a dark place as well. I feel like I've pulled myself out it for a bit now but it's just a matter of before i sink back into the darkness again😒
I'm 39. I was molested from ages 4-6. Had immediate signs of p.t.s.d. as a child, and still do. Extreme panic attacks, severe depression. Started binge drinking every fri and Saturday night from 12-18. I got addicted to pills (opiates) as a young teen. Shooting heroin full time by 19. Still shooting heroin mostly fentynl cuz that's wat there is, 150-200$ a day. Just can't seem to stop. The years I skated heaviest from 14-20 were my happiest years. I'm going to be 40 in 2 months and I'm about to buy a new complete n get back to it. We finally got a few sk8parks in the ghetto on the Eastside of Detroit. (Thank you God!! Kids needed these!!!). Please if your reading this- go tell someone your problems, if you hold them in they will DESTROY YOU I didn't tell anyone until I was 30. Too late. Also please don't touch Heroin. I know it's easy to say you won't. I never dreamed I would. Then my dad died, girlfriend died all kinds of other stuff added on top of my traumatic past and I ended up on the crap trying to cope. Self medicating. Heroin RUINS THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. IT RUINS YOUR BRAIN. YOULL NEVER BE THE SAME. PLEASE DONT TOUCH IT PLEASE!!! Wish me luck in the board n kicking this junk. Hopefully I don't break my old bones relearning how to fall lol. Rest Peacefully Brother Ben, I love you and miss you G.
My biggest disappointment in life was finding out that the statement "Do what you are passionate about as a career and you`ll never work a day in your life" was very very untrue, doing what you are passionate about for work totally kills the passion that drew you to it in the first place...when joy becomes work, all passion is sucked out from it...
My parents always told me "work a job that allows you to enjoy what you love" ...meaning, work a job that pays enough to enjoy your hobbies/what you love AND that gives you the TIME to do it.
this is such a powerful story..I know this journey well.skating and surfing have been saviours for me growing up. the community ,,the challenges and the excitement give me so much joy.. ben was an amazing skater and by all accounts a beautiful human. its so sad his life ended like this,, he had so much to offer.. the foundation is an incredible idea and I sincerely hope it brings solace to his friends and family in offering help and the tools to cope to so many...thnks for telling this story..Rip in Paradise brother!!
I watched a boneless tutorial by Ben and I thought “this guy is the most goofy (no pun) and happy skater I’ve ever seen”. So devastating you’ll forever be missed Ben.
This is like the old Vice. Thank you. Good job on part of the Foundation. Your doing a very very important job by filling a void. We still love you Ben.
Having a son who loves skateboarding I hope he grows up knowing he’s loved no matter what and I hope he continues to love skateboarding, he’s a natural and I couldn’t be more proud of him I just hope he knows how much he is loved an cherished .. Thank you for making this video honestly after loosing so many people close to me due to suicide or overdose this video definitely hit home but it was worth the watch that’s for sure and gave hope!!
At 45 I have a Ma who knows that skating has been the joy in my life for 30+ years, I'm too battered to skate much now (due to a genetic condition, not skating ironically), but even as busted as I am she still supports my skating on days when I can. We both know the repercussions of a fall could be tough, but life is tough anyway, and skating makes me feel good inside in a way nothing else does. I know I have her love and support, and it's always been important to me at any age. My birthday was a few days ago and she gave me the money to get some new trucks. I'm sure she'd rather I didn't skate, but skating has been my joy since I was a kid. Sometimes all you can do is give someone your love and support and hope for the best. I've got my own son, with his own unique challenges now, and all that love and support that I got from my Ma is being funnelled into him now because I know how much of an impact it has on a kid. Choose happiness, choose family, choose passion, choose love. You're a great parent, and you're never too old to learn how to skate. If he's talented he might have got it from you! There used to be two older gentleman in the nineties, in pinstripe suits, overcoats, bowler hats and briefcases that would hit up my local skatepark in South London. A little after six am, they'd get out a broom from behind the quarterpipe and brush all the bits off the concrete, then they'd have a blast around the park for half an hour before going off to work in the financial district in East London. My best friend and I were usually at the skatepark from 10pm till about 7am, as there was street lighting and it was empty overnight most of the time. Those two came early for the same reason, we had a few others that didn't like the prime time too and mostly skated late at night. So you don't have to have eyes on you while you're learning, helps a little with the confidence ;)
Skating has helped me stay here. Going out and having my mind only focused on my tricks helps me so much. Sometimes you feel like the world is against you and it slowly eats away at you. Stay strong everyone
didnt know about this guy until today and i want to say thank you for sharing his story. he is a true legend from this day on and will inspire many people in so many ways possible just from wacthing this Video. Thanks for this again and Rest in Peace Ben Raemers
Ben, forever. My Mom's fiancé, took his own life two weeks before their wedding. We think due to unknown gambling debts, but who really knows when it comes to mental health. It was the most traumatic experience of my life, not so much the loss, but the pain and destruction that his death caused to my Mom, his children, and his family. Always reach out. Always talk if you feel the need. Love. Salute.
Amazing documentary. Really positive meaning and creation of emotional stirring that made me wonder about those friends that may just need more from me as a friend. I’ve never heard of Ben Raemers before, but now I’ve seen this, I feel like I’ll remember his name forever.
“Most men will receive their first bundle of flowers at their funeral”
Belly had a song about this. The chorus goes,” before I disappear give me my flowers while I’m still here.”
m.ruclips.net/video/T9in9fx2_VU/видео.html
@@ninjamusic9554 that’s not even related this is about a man committing suicide and how mental health matters not anything about transgenders
@@ninjamusic9554 Ywnbaw
@@ethan.2306 I think the sentiment is similar?
It's sad but almost seems true
thanks for telling bens story. my mom committed suicide when i was 11 and it broke my heart. I started to make a living of skateboarding 12 years later and been experiencing panic attacks after that which also led to suicidal thoughts. i went looking for help and I‘ve been free from these dark thoughts for a long time now. Its important open up and talk. Don’t hesitate to reach out to a friend or doctor. Rest in peace Ben
This comment just made me schedule an appointment with a psychiatrist. I struggle so hard that I can’t even hardly go out and skate anymore…
Thank you for sharing Jonny, my dad did the same when I was the same age as you. Always so many unanswered questions, just keep spreading love, compassion, empathy, and joy as much as possible everyday. Much love brother.
❤️
im so sorry for your loss :( jonny ,It's insane what some people go through in their lives 💔
@@RaoulDukeSr much love to you lovely human ❤️
My little brother went from the average scooter kid to a force to be reckoned with in our local skate community within the span of 2 years. Unfortunately he unexpectedly lost his battle with depression on February 28th. Rest easy little homie, I love you and can’t wait to rip together again one day.
Rest in peace man, you'll find all the love in heaven.
Sry for the lost
So sorry for your loss. Rip to your brother 🙏
Sorry for your loss ❤ fly high lil bro 🕊
Still always come back to this video when I’m feeling down. Skate in peace Ben
This video is a eye opener for me that not all skaters are not what they seem
Exactly. Tell your friends you love them every time you talk to them
@@JCskate4 true so true
thats my local skatepark, his quote lives on the concrete - the birds are singing, the sun is shining, what more can you ask for :)
Same, Ipswich local right here 😊
“ he couldn’t be alone the minute Ben was by himself his mind would do overtime and out came all the demons and problem” I felt that
I think this is a big problem with alot of people. They just can't seem to handle being alone and in their head. You have to be strong mentally. Alcohol will just compound it too. He was self medicating hard core.
Lost to your imagination. Doubt all thoughts.
@@mikejones3560 is that a quote? It's brilliant
I hear that, made me cry.
@@blistabliss yeah she said it in the video
His sister mentioned it with her story, and I think it's a small key: Make the appointment for them. Don't think that your friend or family member will follow through with getting help on their own, even if they say they are going to do so. That can be the hardest part, making the first appointment and speaking to a professional, and people with severe depression/anxiety will often make any excuse not to, and think they can fix things on their own (knowing from experience).
They are sick; they can't/won't do it for themselves.
And don't give up! Even if it takes a hundred attempts, keep reaching out, keep trying until they get the help they need.
Even offer to go with them to get help . & Be there , not empty promises . ❣
@@karenmcardle142 yes exactly also offer to drive/ wait for them
NHS support is not great. As with too much in the world, poorer people suffer the most.
as some one who's mother made this call. i am so happy she made that choice it didnt help me personally but knowing they care means more then anything i have
"There's the selfish part of me that wants Ben here because he's my friend and I like him." That's not selfish dear. That's missing and loving your friend. I'm so sorry for your loss. Love and condolences to all of Ben's family and friends. I hope he's found the peace he couldn't find💗🙏🏽
shes telling you something about what probably happened irl. making a documentary for money is quite selfish. humans cannot think very well or often. they always tell you whats going on in their tiny minds because there simply is nothing else going on
It is selfish though. The person died a young tragic death, he wants to bring them back just because he misses him. No other reason, not because he wants him to enjoy life again or smile again that's the only reason he wrote for his Gain. Very self fish. But it's human.
@@Speedster189 you might be a tad bit off with that comment you clown.
@@disprogreavette8545 You’re the clown here.
he's a lot less selfish then those who commit suicide
"It's a lovely day. The birds are singing, the sun is shining, what more could you ask for?" Ben had such a beautiful soul. I watched his videos growing up following Enjoi. While he may not be here ripping the concrete jungle, he's left a piece of himself that will be carried by the skateboarding community forever.
Yep, that is why blading and boarding should drop the hate. blading is back in huge way with covid and we all need to embrace the lose to skating in all forms.
RIP BEN.
@@Habeev07 I don’t think skaters really hate fruit-booters anymore dude. At least you guys had some level of skatepark etiquette. The kids on scooters with the attention spans of goldfish are the enemy now 😂
What a beautiful comment from Matthew Stenquist. Thank you
this is so beautiful bro thank u
My Wife Hired a Hit Man......ruclips.net/video/WrU7p1VqlSE/видео.html
Big ups to Lucy Raemers for creating this and speaking up about the struggles of mental health in skateboarding. You're doing an amazing thing
Why is there such a mental health crisis in the skating world? Or at least more than other sports?
@@Bradmhj it’s not only in the sports world, mental health is a topic that’s not talked about openly
@@Bradmhj because it's an art, not a sport, numbnuts
how cliche for the female to be the one upset she lost her dog an not concerned the dog wanted away from her
@@Bradmhj there is a mental health crisis in the west. they been savage passive agressive manioulators for centuries. an a few of us will do anything to get away from them. they beat blind belief an obediance in you at birth an mutilate you at birth for the same purpose. then if we do exit we cant ever talk about how the people who come out to claim they miss us are part of the reason we want to die.
so many things. you people should be smart enough by 30 to realize when a f3m talks shes probably not telling you the truth of much
I dont even know who this guy was but I'm crying for him! It's sad that he's gone he seemed like a great spirit! I empathize with losing someone to soon, but just talking about them keeps them alive. Remember the greatness!
Same. Here’s the thing though. I’m a firm believer most good spirits leave this realm quickly. Those who have soul searching still left to do will remain. 🤷🏼♂️ only thing I’ve witnessed happening throughout my life.
This story hit me super hard. My mom committed suicide almost 3 months ago. It was the hardest day of my life. And to hear Bens sister talk, i understand everything she is saying. I myself was "suicidal" at one point. Never understood what they meant when they said it was selfish. After my moms death, it changed the way i look at life. I got the suicide awareness symblom tatted on me now. Im not religious, but i hope one day i can see my mom again. And i hope anyone going through any death can find peace, like im trying to find.
I was alone on my 18th bday at Sunnyvale skatepark Ben & Louie helped push start my car when it wouldnt start. They made sure i was smiling regardless of knowing what i was going through.. never saw these boys without a smile on
😞🙏
So sad, I currently suffer from depression and just started skating again at the age 54, it really helps me each day. Never knew this young guy but my heart goes out to his family and friends
Keep on that, sir
sir keep doing what you love I encourage you to find meditation and surpass the demonic thoughts that we have. I'm sorry to read that, but I hope you can get better help with the assistance of those you love: always speak, don't be afraid or ashamed to do it
Keep skating bro.
Carpe Diem Not as simple as that some people have "perfect" lives and still are depressed everyday.
All the best man
made me breakdown,,. I’m gonna reach out and get help tomorrow.. thank you for sharing this story and may Ben Rest In Peace
I Hope you got help and are feeling much better 🍀❤️🩹💐🤞🏻💜
Hey, I hope you feel better. :)
hey, i hope you got the help you need :)
Yesss!
I'm gonna give my homies flowers from now on cause we are always blooming and blossoming with new things in life. That is the growth we must appreciate, the growth that occurs in the good and in the bad. Live it up amongst the seasons, my friends! : , )
Mental health is a real issue man. It's tough
…… we all have issues to some degree. Too bad military funding takes so much of our tax dollars away which would be better spent on our citizens. Rip sir.
@@jennifer_____8833 Yawn….
Get some new material already.
I’ve never heard of Ben but I was led to this video for a reason , everyone out there struggling with mental health just know you are never alone there are many people here that want to hear your voice and feel your feelings.
... sadly some people can never be saved ... I admire the sentiments made in this story ... however, the medical profession poorly understand both the brain and how emotions actually work ... it's tied to the consciousness, mind and body problem, which is insanely difficult to comprehend ... I've been dealing with traumatic grief for twenty years and still discovering how much psychiatry poorly understands the grief response ... I would add that close contacts should realise that drinking alcohol is not a panacea ... and neither is professional medication for these issues ... alcohol is the most socially damaging drug on the planet. I would not be surprised if Ben's so called "friends" also played an influential role in heavy drinking sessions and not knowing Ben's history of family dysfunction, would be a recipe for disaster ...
@@dn1697 i dont admire jack squat. when you die anyone can say anything. your worst enemy can make a documentary telling the world how much they loved you.
in fact if someone killa you they will indeed tell the world how sad they are an how close you were cause they know you wont say jack sheet an dont want the blame.
I don't think that's the main issue regarding depression or even one at all it can be I suppose but it's more like a brain disease atleast that's how I'd describe it what other people think doesn't really affect me it's what I think I could have all the support in the world doesn't make any difference
You’re right
Everyone needs help if they feel like they are alone or depressed
But I don’t know much on this topic so I can’t say much
As a guy you can’t talk about what you really feel. You’re weak, you’re not allowed to have emotions. No such thing as ups and downs. I know it’s not true but it certainly feels that way. Thanks for bringing light to this. I can completely relate to this.
His sister is doing an amazing job, I’m sure he’s really proud. RIP Ben
Ben was what led me to get help. Always loved his skating and was crushed when he passed.
When did he die? Yes, a home without a father makes the children something like 80% more likely to end up addicted, in prison, or dead, most of the time all 3. This, amongst other reasons, is the main reason black culture has been so destroyed. When a father doesn’t stay in a home, especially for a son, that child is spiritually and emotionally fragmented and will rebel and act out
@@Willyk200921 very true. Also among the Latino community
@@mamahuevo359 yes, pretty much every community has this problem if they’re poor, except really the Asian community. Their culture is surrounded by honor and family tradition, no matter how poor they get, they keep their family tight. That’s one of the big reasons they work so hard and do so well in school, they don’t have an option to not most times, that’s just what it is. If there are no values around keeping a mother and father together for their children, and we let the government incentivize single parent house holds for a bigger check every month, well continue to see a cycle of addiction, mental illness, criminal activity, and death. Life is hard enough, every child deserves a mother and father to instill values in them, or we end up having broken children creating more broken children and the cycle can only become worse
@@Willyk200921 this sir is some of the most true things I have ever heard, and you speak it with professionality really gets you thinking, thank you for this comment. As someone your speaking of this is very true, mostly for all communities/ethnicities.
@@barebonesjones yes sir, just don’t let anyone tell you there’s no difference between a man and woman. Because what they want to say is that there’s no God, that we weren’t created, and that’s so far from true. We were created by a loving God and He made man and woman perfect for one another with unique qualities, specific to the sex. A man needs to be a man, and the children he has need him regardless of what corporate media says. The science says it all
Ben had those clean flow tricks with that smooth style, what a natural talent
He was so tight, so icey. Didn’t have to be super techy, he was just spot on all the time.
@@lorde2327 the disrespect.
@@lorde2327 Yuck
Like he was dancing. Sublime talent
I feel like most of the time the closest people always say, "Oh you arent gonna do that." Which clearly shows how naïve some people can be to the pain a human can suffer from. I feel for the family and closest friends. Nothing hits harder then finding out some news like this..... RIP Ben
I had a dear friend James, who I befriended on the streets of South Beach, who I lost to a heavy Xanax addiction the same day Kobe also passed, that so happened to be laced with fentanyl. He was such an incredible skateboarder and he had bliss and peace on his board. It was so evident how much he loved it. I am naming my son in his honor, whenever I have him. I miss you so much J
As another addict, accept my sincere condolences.
Rest in peace🕊️ God bless his soul 🙏🏻 I wish you a lot of strength w/ 💜
As a recovering heroin addict and skateboarder. I can’t agree more when it comes to have structure and a schedule. I’ve made the choice of working 7 days a week because of that reason. Work, skate, and recover. Thats what I do. This video hit me hard
“Work, skate and recover.” I love those words. I am going to say that to myself everyday while I struggle. Thx, bruv.
@@chuck6033 “'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a Hope and a Future. '” - Jeremiah 29:11. God see’s you and he loves you.
@@Nikki-ci5ze Amen to that and may God bless you and you all ✝️🛐
Much respect man
You've got this💯💯
You’re saying working 7 days a week and skating is helping you?
The stigma associated with mental illness is astounding. Like it’s a real issue that needs more attention.
Edit: changed “health” to “illness”. Thankfully someone pointed out my mistake in saying that.
@@jennifer_____8833 hey dude can you like, stop
bruh these bots are taking over yt recently
@@Paranoid_Alchemist They're bots, do not engage with them, and just report them, otherwise you legitimize their accounts.
In America it's the other way around. Depending on where u live, people are SHOCKED to hear you have no prescriptions or speak to someone
@@papa_pt I know, right? Like dude…it’s a big problem here and yet we act like it’s not as important as social media..
I will never forget him, such a beautiful human and skateboarder. Peace and love for everyone here and later.
Thank you for sharing Ben’s story…I ve suffered most of my life with severe clinical depression and anxiety. Suicidal Ideations, plans…..I’m a survivor of an attempt…….you just never know the struggles one may be going through in their own head….it’s a scary place in there at times….but it’s scarier when those thoughts bring a sense of peace, which is when I know that I need to get it together….it’s a constant struggle to want to want to live…..that is difficult for those who have never suffered with mental illness to comprehend. Mental health is SO important……here’s to taking it day by day, sometimes hour by hour……🖤
You have totally been missing out Girl! Jesus is here and has been here waiting for you all along! Come to Him. Call on Him. He hears you but you need to call His NAME for HELP. His name is JESUS. "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved" (Romans 10:13). I DARE YOU! GO AHEAD AND TRY HIM. You will be blessed. Be blessed by these words. Jesus loves you 😊.
@@abigailquinones3707 Omg stop.
I didn't know Ben before this video, RIP 😔 what an amazing skater
Yeah I've never heard of him myself, but he was extremely good
Ditto, he was so adorable and genuine 😕
This means so much to me. As someone who’s struggled to not take my own life for 11 years now stuff like this gives me the strength to fight on.
“'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. '” - Jeremiah 29:11. I pray you Gavin, accept Jesus love. Amen.
Is there anything you have done or that you currently do that makes things easier for you? To stop feeling the emptiness or whatever it is that makes us feel that way?
There is love out there for you, your worth is always more than you think - there’s no pressure to be anyone but yourself, please stay positive. We all have struggled, some days are tougher than others but you are making the world a better place.
Hey you matter okay. If I can do it so can you! Just gotta keep pushing through everyday. The more you stay positive and keep going it’ll get a little easier everyday. Life’s worth it. Pick yourself back up everyday. You’re not alone.
You deserve to be happy Gavin.
Go and take it.
Hello, @VICE . I've been skating for 5 years and also happen to be a psycho therapist in southern Taiwan.
I was so touched by this video and Ben's story. I want to spread the message to our skating community as well here in Taiwan to help raise awareness about mentle health.
I wonder if there are ways for me to add Chinese subtitles to this?
I hope this message get to someone.
RUclips should have not removed community captions
get them chinese subtitles!
please do! it's important
I feel so very sad. My sons are 18 and 20 both skaters one more than the other and he struggles at times and I am so proud at the strength he has shown to get through what he has been through. I couldn’t live without either of my boys. My love for them is bigger than me. To those of you who are at this difficult age, your mind is tricking you into thinking distorted thoughts, it’s not the truth and you will get through it. There is so much to live for so much to see and do! We get on chance and once we go that’s it lights out. I pray for all of you struggling out there if anyone needs someone to talk to I’m here for you! Reach out. Please. Xxx
I bet you’re a great mom and I hope your boys have enjoyable life’s knowing that they’re lucky to have a mom like you
Ben story will live on forever and change the minds of so many ❤️✌️🛹
Made me Wana more 🌚
'What more can you ask for'
@Seven Inches of Throbbing Pink Jesus your username is evil its horrible
Yep, that is why blading and boarding should drop the hate. blading is back in huge way with covid and we all need to embrace the lose to skating in all forms.
Brink - soul skaters
Well to be fair, a lot famous celebrities commit suicide and some of them have family, including children.
The most famous was.. What was his name again.. A comedian who voice the genie in Aladin..
And the drummer from Linkin Park.
What we should do is find the cause that lead them to the no return path.
Same goes for mass shooters.
I remember it always start with bullying and toxic environments where you feel like you're all alone.
I started taking antidepressants, going to therapy, and opening up about my mental unwellness right after Ben died. We love you Ben!
Keep fighting the good fight brother, hope all is as well as it can be
Keep doing whatever it takes to get through life. That’s it. Unfortunately psyche meds can create a litany of worse problems, as I’m sure you know, but they’re sometimes a necessary solution for a desperate situation.
Jesus loves you Mike. He's waiting for you .
This is why we need good fathers around. If you're a dad, be the best you can for your children. Be there. If you're a wife/partner, be good to men. We have issues, too, and we need love just as much.
whanowa. FACTS. God bless.
MATE DONT MAKE THIS ABOUT WOMEN BEING GOOD TO MEN
Im no skater but i cried my way through this video because it resonated with me. My mom took an overdose when i was 5 months old leaving me and my brother with a depressed father with anger issues. Throughout my life i've been struggling with anxiety, depression, as well as suicidal thoughts. I'm getting the help i need now in the form of therapy and medication. Skipping the booze also helped. Alcohol is a nice temporary anxiety relief that made mefeel united with my friends, but drinking only created more in the end (atleast for me).
Do you want to help a suffering friend? Make that call you have been thinking about. Take your friend out for a walk, a meal, a chat, invite him/her over or whatever. When you have suicidal thoughts you lose touch with reality, you are powerless against your thought patterns, meaning that someone from the outside need to interfere. Make that call, or else, one day it might be too late.
Well your father would easily develop those issues from that experience, if anything I would advise getting into a sport that you can love and meeting people. Brains need stimulation and so any reasonable amount of exercise is a good thing to feed some healthy chemicals in there, start small and build up, it's not about willpower as much as a healthy habit, plus a change of scenery is nearly always good for the soul.
Sometimes you need to listen to your gut when you feel like someone is truly sad. It's hard to approach us, but any smile we receive can be the spark, that helps to light the fire that keeps the demons away.
Ain’t that the truth…✨
Basically, just be a good human being.....Something that is greatly lacking in our society...
Indeed
Man I felt this
no. you 🌈 girls today dont understand how males act an think. littlerly. your society is out of touch with reality an all have been feminized. cept the females who have half way turned to the males. estrogen actually seems to hinder thought an critical thinking so they have never understood tho we can describe them. so my first part is semi inaccurate
Having lost a sibling to suicide, this hits close to home. It's easy to say in hindsight that all the signs were there, but in the moment you tend to overlook them, either out of embarrassment or an aversion to having an uncomfortable talk with that person. But it's critical to have that level of trust and communication, so that when your friend, partner, or sibling does express their feelings and well-being, that they feel heard and not like they're being a burden on someone else.
We've all had that reluctance to ask for help when we clearly need it, and to ask for help is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of courage and willpower. It's encouraging to see the skateboarding community rally around the cause. I hope the boost in awareness leads to greater mental health and assistance for anyone struggling.
Hello beautiful, I hope you had a good day today, as it was a new day and the sorrows and scars of yesterday can be healed with love and time and patience and control of the heart and the mind. If you need help with managing the feelings of trying to cope with the loss of a loved one please do not hesitate to reach out to a professional *therapist* that can help you hone your ability to manage such tragedy's. I hope you can heal given enough time and support. All the best. Your friend.
Well spoken, friend. I am incredibly touched by you speaking so vulnerably. All the love💗
I AM IN THIS BOAT AT THE MOMENT, i have asked for help from family and friends, i am a single dad and thats the only thing keeping me going, i know i am struggle internally and its fucking hard. but if he can make our name can live on and he is happy. i hope i cant push on till then.
@@jessers436 Hope things get better for you brother
I'm 28 years old, I skate, and I thought of suicide and had, in my past, sincerely wanted to do suicide. Just seeing the title of the video and watching the first few seconds and thinking (and tearing for some seconds), I could've been gone if I followed through with that mentality. It gets so dark and cold to where you stop feeling the sadness and you go into a mad state of mind, mad as in like not in-tune with how people can really be there for you, and they do care. When you start opening up a bit to see people do care, it destroys that false reality of a cold, dark mindset. To do the action beyond this point is to say there is no hope. People get afraid to be in the spotlight, even in the smallest of situations, and they contemplate and makes them very sad they can't function. This is me, but I know what we experience is common with a lot of people and once you see we all go through the same things, you can begin to shine light on the realities of the world to where it can even brighten your day and others.
The people going through these suicidal phases of thought, are the sincerest people in the world that they would hold beliefs so strong in a reality, but to not manifest those values across society, we lose an important portion of understanding and beauty of life. To say they're mentally ill in the process of getting out of this dark phase in their life, is an insult to the constitution of the realities of the beauty of all that we have. You don't tell someone "Get help" or "you need help", or "you need to talk it through". They understand this already. In fact, they see more value than you to be in that intense of a despair in life. They should be valued and esteemed highly, not condemned like they were simply in a tough time. Half the people that say they're depressed, don't even know what depression is. To me, in my experiences, it's a huge loss of love. They seek to fill that void. When it's not being met, they hold value because they see what needs to be done for the resolution. This is why we should value them greatly. They hold great paths for society. This is why it's so indescribably sad when someone does suicide. What happened? We missed the whole point.
I struggle with drinking myself and it seems like a really hard way to go. I made the choice a few weeks ago to stop. I’ve slipped up like 10 times but this last time was so painful the next day. It’s almost like alcohol itself makes me quit because it’s so damn rough on the body.
Alcoholism is a rough way to go
Hey, I hope you’re doing great and that you’re healthy. Keep pushing yourself to change! Best wishes to you and your family!
You never know what the other person is struggling with. To say “he had the life” isn’t fair. You just never know what it is going on, we are are just having a human experience, just do your best to listen to your friends, really listen. Skate in Peace Ben.
Yeah.
You’re right. People can continue to give you bullet points as to how and why your life is good, but they won’t ever know your true emotions and feelings deep down. For many kids, they learn throughout their life to hide the pain of not having parents. It makes them angry inside to see other people with loving families but they feel like God or someone made them devoid of it.
It takes a true mentor to guide a kid successfully through life, which I’m assuming he never really had. It seemed like he never had someone tell him what to do.
he was abducted by aliens there is more to that story
Life's a struggle for sure , I'v had the same thoughts many a times . Lived the whole drug booze skate buzz for years . I'm addicted to fps shooters online and at 43 now I honestly can say I'v had it with life , I'm just so tired with myself . But I do have people around me that I care for and they care for me . I guess they give me something to live for . I got bells palsy which paralyzes half on ya face and I suffer from dry eye disease from it with is a real challenge each day I wake up , feels like I'm hell . I guess I kinda like myself to some degree . People need to tell people how they feel . I also suffered from hearing voices in my head from too much drinking . Drugs n booze are the true mind killers and negative people
@@mehDOGIESRATS2222 sounds like cool life u have drugs and games , what exactly you playing ?
Mental health is an extremely important subject that needs to be talked about more. Just remember you are not alone I promise. Stay alive 🖤
No more weed drugs or alcohol in skate culture. We get one mind. If people can't understand taking mind altering substances is a bad thing well I just don't know what to say. Smoking weed is not cool and it never will be. 😔
"the birds are singing, the sun is shining, what more can you ask for" - such a beautiful soul. I don't know him but I'm in tears
This really got me. I lost my dad to suicide in 2010. It was myself who found him. I’ve blocked it out and never really dealt with it but this really got me. So glad something so good and positive and full of hope was able to come from such a tragic event. Ben seemed like such an amazing person it’s brilliant to see his memory being shared by so many people for such a good cause.
i hope you are doing well
So sorry mate. That's such a rough thing to go through and incredibly brave if you to talk about. Best wishes to you
💚 ❤️ 💛
I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. As a person that struggles with mental health issues, it's a very different way we see the world. I hope that he is somewhere peaceful. Rest in peace.
im glad she could sell a lot of dvds too. hopefully she has enough money now she wont have to exploit soemone elses death again
Lost my Sister to suicide last year. I’ve struggled with depression my whole life, my skateboard and fly rod are what always bring me back to center. Life is hard, but beauty, wonder and happiness can often be restored with perseverance. That being said, no one can ever completely understand what it’s like to live within the confines of someone else’s mind. Thanks for your contribution to skateboarding and to the world overall Ben, travel well.
. "That being said, no one can understand what it's like to live within the containers of someone else's mind" so very very true. You never know what someone else is going through and when you see there highs you often don't know anything about their lows. Be a good a friend to yourself and spend time with people you care about. Best wishes my friend
Check your vitamin D levels.
@@latricer6686 They found that a large percentage of those in mental hospitals have low vit. d levels.
@@latricer6686 mine are good, I take a D supplement. My brain is just wired wrong and I auto default to dark thoughts. I’ve been proactive and made strides in treating and thinking better of myself. It’s a constant struggle, but there is a lot of good in my life. One day at a time.
rip to ben and your sister. May we be able to help people in their honor. Good day
Mental health is needed to be looked at more seriously, sometimes as people we aren't good ,smiling but deathly unhappy....
Never knew or heard of This Man but I can relate. I haven’t been able to shake off my thoughts of “ending” for sometime now. Rest In Peace Ben, your story is touching to a fellow suffer.
Keep busy and head up dude❤👍
3 weeks ago, I lost my brother due to complications with liver failure/drinking heavily for nearly a decade. A bitter pill to swallow, and there's the lingering feelings you "should have done more" or "could have set him on a better path" but you can't do that without the person wanting to. He was a bright, vibrant person with many talents - a great and witty writer and a musician but he seemingly gave up trying to fix his demons of his past (An absent father during his early years). He was 36, and I had visions of getting old and grumpy with him, playing backgammon weekly and listening to music like we did years ago. That reality isn't available for him. If you're feeling like falling into the void, please find someone to talk about it with - It must be incredibly difficult to do this first step, but there are always people who love and cherish you and want to help.
Wow. I’m sorry about your brother ❤️ He seemed like a really cool human being
I’m sorry 😢 for your loss! You didn’t cause it, you couldn’t control it, and you couldn’t cure it. The disease of addiction is really traumatizing. I pray you never blame yourself.
I'm 42 and have been on the same path, recently became sober. That's tragic, sorry to hear. How old was your brother?
“It’s a lovely day the birds are singing the sun is shining what more could you ask for” I’m in tears
I remember when this happened shortly after watching KoTR and seeing how happy he seemed, only to get this crushing news a short time later. My condolences and prayers continue to go out to the family and friends of Ben🙏🏼
Who are you going to pray to? The "loving" god who lets this kind of thing happen? What an absolute monster this fictional being is.
@@robheffernan everyone's perception of God is different. If a soul cries for another we should let them pray to that end. Just because Christians used others affinity to 'god' as a means to control, doesn't mean others pray under the same intention. Don't let your anger tarnish the meaning behind someone else's message.
@@DScapo0 I firmly believe it is offensive to tell ones family that their prayers are with them, when it is the god they are praying to that let this happen. What a thug this god is. Oh, and my "anger" - I'm just pumped by the fact this god business is going down the toilet as more and more people have access to FACTS.
It's always the people that try to please everyone else first that end up dying well before their time should be up. During that KoTR it seemed like he was there to make everyone else smile first. It's such a sad thing to lose someone so young to something that could have been prevented. He was a great skater but the way everyone else has described him since his passing says he was just a beautiful human in general.
@@DScapo0 I’m not religious but they way i try to explain it is “God doesn’t take, just receives”
Thank you for sharing this piece. Ben’s sister is a living tribute to her brother and I hope she continues to work on her own mental health as an ode to her love for him.
Oh my gosh. This just showed up in my feed out of nowhere. About ten years ago I met this guy at the airport in SF and we had a really long and lovely chat about Suffolk and skating. We had a lot in common. It was a really explosive and energised conversation between two really excitable people, I remember, but we never got to exchanging names. I never forgot this encounter and ten years later I stumble across this and it turns out it was Ben. This is so devastating. My heart goes out to his loved ones. Thank you so much for telling his story.
He had a team, friends and community and still decided to go. Imagine those of us who have hardly anything to hold into…
Hold onto yourself. Hold on to what greatness is to come. Hold onto intellect, being wise will take you far in life. Hold on to possibilities, the possibility of becoming greater than the person you were yesterday. Hold on to peace, inner peace shall liberate you. All these things come from within an individual. It's the power of us. Soon you'll be so strong, others will want to lean on you.
@@JDBlueprint thats cool and all but not realistic in fields like music which cuts you off at 30 years old
@@Andu_music right. I wanted to be an actress but I know that it'll destroy me. And I would be in a very darker place because of the judgement, criticism, looks, age, etc. Things I have no control over but yet everyone will drop me because of it...can't deal with that and I refuse to deal with that. But you're right, it's harder to hold onto inner peace when there is so much chaos around you. Especially in the entertainment industry.
@@JDBlueprint YES!!! CLAIMED.
@@JDBlueprint That is beautiful
We just need to look out for everyone and each other. People are very good at hiding their emotions and only talking with them can you truly understand what they are going through. May Ben Rest in Peace
Most people have their own problems to deal with. i know this is gonna seem kinda selfish, but i cant afford to deal with other people's problems, while im still dealing with mine, and my family's.
@@suckmyballzgameplays7172 you can only help others once you've helped yourself. I know for a fact I won't be able to help anyone because I'm so low and depressed, it wouldn't help. Don't feel selfish about it, if you can't help others there is other ways you can help.
@@SgtBurned sorry to hear that, mate. I sincerely hope you get better.
@@suckmyballzgameplays7172 right, it’s more about funding support networks and a social safety net
@@rubytuesday7716 if someone doesn't believe you and is dismissive of your feelings you should seek people who will listen if you can or especially a therapist if you can. It's a very relatable problem because those closest to you are often the ones who hear your problems the most so they might think you're actually fine. I have the same problem because I seem very happy go lucky and inevitably go out of my way to seem happy or say I'm okay when I really don't know. It can be very difficult but I hope you're doing well today friend.
After only watching 5mins+ of Ben Raemers i still felt the impact of the tradegy... damn. The foundation is inspiring!
This hit so hard and I know that crying is good. Suicidal thoughts do meander and I always ask myself why do they surface. It's because they're trapped in my mind. It is a big relief to let someone know that you are not okay
As someone who just lost a best friend to suicide.. this video just said everything I needed to hear. Thank you.
My condolences bro 💪🏽🙏🏽💙💯🏁
@@reesebonez168 thanks, homie 💚
So sorry for your loss. I hope that you are able to remember the good that your friend gave you. And realize that they are never far from your heart.
So sorry to hear that. Stay strong 💛
In you didn't see this video (or a similar video) sooner, and possibly caught on to some of the signs/symptoms in your friend, and maybe you could have helped him get help
"A drunk man tells no tales" bless his heart he only had the courage to tell them ALL he needed help while drinking but they all blamed the drinking as temporary feelings..
It's so refreshing to hear that there are so many in a similar boat. On the other hand, It's also very sad. I'm just glad we can talk openly about this now, it's definitely a step in the right direction. For a long time the skate community has just pushed their feelings aside and ended up making things worse. That's why it gives me hope knowing this open discussion about the links between skateboarders and trauma, head injuries, anxiety, depression etc. is quite common now
Ben's smile was infectious. I was stunned when I first heard of what had happened. I'm glad he was not forgotten 🙏
When my son was about 11 years old he entered a Jaycee Relay Race. He’d never ran track before and didn’t know everybody wore shorts. He came in jeans, to everyone’s amusement. He ran the last leg for his team - and came away the fastest runner of the day, and made up considerable distance to win. This video made me think of that day. How I wish I had been able to see it, instead of only hear and read about it. I was a single mom and had to work. My son was an amazing athlete. ❤️
Single parents hold the world on their shoulders. It isnt just two times as hard parenting alone, it more like ten times. That is such an awesome story of your child. It helps me to remember to cherish every single moment i have with my children. We are blessed and truly lucky to have these moments with one another. Thank you
What does that have to do with the video????
what happened? Why he only was?
@@user-oc6xd4ee5l Their child died too. They used was, not are, past tense.
Show some respect and be nicer to other's.
Did you not watch the video?
@@user-oc6xd4ee5l so fekking rude!!
I really appreciate Vice for telling a bit of his story. It brought me to tears because I've been hiding my thoughts since I was 9yrs Old and I can understand both sides listening to this.
lol its the Rothschild parasites of vice. no wonder its all babies in the comments an a gossip queen documentary 🙄
@@ShawnJonesHellion zero people---zero----will understand that comment. (other than me....but that's cause I'm a weirdo too)
Jesus loves you. He knows how you feel. Won't you share it with Him? He really cares. Give Him a chance. "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved" (Romans 10:13). If you try Jesus, YOU WON'T REGRET IT. TRUST THAT. Be blessed by these words.
He made sure when he was filmed, because he knew his time was short, to connect, to dedicate, and to leave his love behind..I love you ben, thank you.
I am an avid mental health awareness advocate and spoken word performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my RUclips channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. ❤️
It's hard not being in a proper friend group, I'm on my own a lot
I can really imagine the alcohol did not help with his anger and unwanted emotions.
When you suffer lack of control in any manner mentally, emotionally or physically alcohol can really exacerbate the lack of control and ones problems.
Then the alcohol becomes the tool needed to control and keep yourself together but it’s a ticking bomb because your problems dont get better and over time you become unable to deal with your issues without alcohol and it becomes a much greater struggle because you have all these problems and nothing helps and you become so overwhelmed that you can’t handle it.
RIP Ben I pray God had a special place for you in his Garden and that your in peace now and no longer suffering.
I am a survivor of suicide and it really makes me sad and pain inside to hear of someone losing their life’s to suicide.
If you suffer or know someone who suffers mental illness or have or know someone with issues with suicidal feelings or thoughts please please reach a hand out for help and try to do what you can to get help for yourself or your loved one.
Sometimes support from a loved one or stranger even can change a persons life.
Take care all of you and I pray God Blesses all of you always.
Peace to all and all in peace!!
Good insight on the alcohol. You are so right. Keep on rocking in the free world !!
Thanks for sharing Ben's story.. its heartbreaking for everyone involved.. such a sad story but he had a great group of friends and his beautiful sister just want to send you a hug 💗 may his beautiful soul rest in peace x
Rest in peace Ben.Thanks for uploading this .it's going to help so many people.much love to his sister and friends ❤️
Shouts out to Louie for transitioning into that OG homie status. To lead as best he can these young guys in the skate business.
For real.
I can relate to this guy. I have been having mental issues ever since I was a child. Depression, OCD, going through a trauma, feeling disconnected from the world around you, feeling like you don't belong anywhere you go, I went into an addiction that was worsening and I was going deeper into abyss of the nightmare created by my own mind. Countless times I was contemplating suicide and was feeling absolutely hopeless. I'm really glad I did not. I got sober and started doing things in life that make me happy and feel proud of what I do. It keeps me grounded although I still sometimes have outbreaks of anxiety and panic attacks, I sometimes would wake up and my heart pounding like crazy and I feel like I'm dying. I come down, meditate and things get better. Suicide is never a solution to the problem
subliminal will help
Look into parasite cleanse and which vitamins you might be deficient in.
Some research seems to suggest that diet deficiencies may play a significant role in mental illness. Talk of Vitamin D and NAC deficiencies!?✌
@@oswaldjames6295 Orthomolecular/Alternative Drs. treat depression using NUTRITION - which is a SCIENCE - food allergies can make one suicidal as well - these Drs. take a stool sample & urine/blood - they check for CANDIDA/FUNGUS overgrowth in bloodstream/bowel.. there are many books written about candida and how to lessen its effect - diet/antifungals - they also check for parasites - again if you do have them you need to do a cleanse - also heavy metal cleanse - food allergies checked - nutritional deficiencies checked - and VERY IMPORTANT - get your THYROID CHECKED.. when going too slowly it can cause awful symptoms of depression - along with more symptoms.. also get it checked for HASHIMOTO'S THYROIDITIS.. IT SWINGS BOTH WAYS.. HYPER AND HYPOTHYROID.. NOT FUN.. WHEN THYROID OFF YOU GET PANIC ATTACKS.. also must take essential fatty acids for brain function - heart function and hormonal function.. Knowledge is power..Good Luck to Everyone suffering from depression..
Yes, suicide is never a solution BUT JESUS IS. Try Jesus. Give Him a chance. Call on His Name and WATCH HIM DELIVER YOU. HE CAN DO IT. I KNOW HE CAN. HE DID IT FOR ME AND MANY OTHERS. Come to Him and SEEEE.. Be blessed by these words. Jesus loves you 😊.
It’s so hard when someone is super social and loves being with others but has problems like this because they lose a lot more when they withdraw into depression- it takes you from your friends and makes it so hard to be alive.
Also it’s really hard to lose a brother, especially one you felt responsible for because you must feel that guilt even more in addition to feeling like you’ve lost a friend.
Anti depressants have done wonders for me. I feel robbed of an entire life, not knowing that normal people get to live this happy. Along with therapy, vulnerability, communication and different forms of self love and healing, I now want to be here. As a fellow man and skateboarder, I feel you. You're not alone. People want you alive. I promise
To his sister, our pursuers are with you and THANK YOU FOR DOING SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF, AND OTHERS. It’s a wonderful gift to help even one family avoid having to deal with that, and i believe you are helping many…which is such an amazing thing to give. We love you!
If you're struggling with mental health I know it feels extremely lonely but only when you talk about it will you know that others are facing the same demons.You matter.You are important. You are valid. Please don't leave us.
This video really hits hard. Such a tragic story but at the same time inspiring and puts the message across insanely well. Keep skating up there ben mate ❤
Thank you for saving lives!♥️ I lost my close friend to suicide 7 years ago, he was a skater as well. Shame kills so many of us. Especially men that are told not to be emotional. Being emotional is who we are as people and I wish we could all accept it. Me and most of my friends have some kind of emotional issues, I struggled most of my life with severe CCPTSD. What saves my life in moments of struggle is people around me who I can tell how I feel without judgement.
I’m sad for every life stolen to suicide but hoping we can all change it with small gestures of support and love towards each other. Sending lots of love from London ♥️♥️♥️🍀
You can tell Ben and his sister have such amazing souls rest in peace Ben and to the sister thank you for being such an inspiration to so many hurting souls out there
Sending love to Ben and everyone. I have definitely experienced suicidal thoughts. They come and go. I'm 41. Some days are tougher to get through, but life is beautiful. I want to be here to see it all. The good, bad and the ugly. Rip Ben ❤
I'm the same age. And wonder why we have these thoughts
I pray you do Stefan. I pray you know truly receive Jesus love. God is Love and He want us to have His love in us. Isaiah 49:15 “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!” You are not forgotten but are a treasure to God Almighty! Romans 5:8-9 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him!”
It's awesome to see the skateboarding community, one I've been a part of for the last 36 years, come out for mental health awareness. I had a tough upbringing, I lost my mom to aggressive cancer at 19 and was diagnosed with severe Bipolar Disorder among other things at 21. I spun out of control for many years. It sounds so fucking cliché and I hate it, but skateboarding did save my life. Just pushing around town and bombing hills got me through some really difficult times. Skateboarding is something that is very special.
I had never really watched much of bens skating, but he was always one of my favorite skaters because of his personality, and the way he came off as someone you wanna be around. Along with making it seem like he was what a skater should be, and that’s to have fun with your friends and ENJOI yourself. Now knowing since his passing I’m not the only one hiding behind camaraderie which coming from a 17 year old should say something for anyone who believes that just because someone is a kid that they don’t feel stressed, or anxious, and of course as well as suicidal. Because as a kid trying to talk about it, people brush it off as “your just a kid”, “you don’t know stress yet”, or “what do you have to be sad about” or quiet honestly the toughest one “suck it up”. That’s not really easy when the bottle of emotions is already at its brim for a lot of people who tend to bottle things up. Rest In Peace Ben, gonna go out and skate for you today
I've been struggling with burnout recently and have been in a very dark state for some time now. I can't imagine what Ben was going through though, considering how bad it got for him. A lot of the signs he was exhibiting has kind of shook me up a bit, and I'm very thankful that you guys shared his story. Mental health is an extremely important and severely under addressed topic in our society. Stay safe and look out for yourself, friends
I understand burnout. I've been dealing with that in the last 4 months or so. I was in a dark place as well. I feel like I've pulled myself out it for a bit now but it's just a matter of before i sink back into the darkness again😒
@@oasis4ever718 I feel like this too.. it's just a matter of time before I fall back into the pit.
You got this!!
I hope you’re standing strong still. Thinking of you
I'm 39. I was molested from ages 4-6. Had immediate signs of p.t.s.d. as a child, and still do. Extreme panic attacks, severe depression. Started binge drinking every fri and Saturday night from 12-18. I got addicted to pills (opiates) as a young teen. Shooting heroin full time by 19. Still shooting heroin mostly fentynl cuz that's wat there is, 150-200$ a day. Just can't seem to stop. The years I skated heaviest from 14-20 were my happiest years. I'm going to be 40 in 2 months and I'm about to buy a new complete n get back to it. We finally got a few sk8parks in the ghetto on the Eastside of Detroit. (Thank you God!! Kids needed these!!!). Please if your reading this- go tell someone your problems, if you hold them in they will DESTROY YOU I didn't tell anyone until I was 30. Too late. Also please don't touch Heroin. I know it's easy to say you won't. I never dreamed I would. Then my dad died, girlfriend died all kinds of other stuff added on top of my traumatic past and I ended up on the crap trying to cope. Self medicating. Heroin RUINS THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. IT RUINS YOUR BRAIN. YOULL NEVER BE THE SAME. PLEASE DONT TOUCH IT PLEASE!!!
Wish me luck in the board n kicking this junk. Hopefully I don't break my old bones relearning how to fall lol.
Rest Peacefully Brother Ben, I love you and miss you G.
Hope you’re doing okay T 💞
Thanks for sharing your story. Sending love and luck
My heart is struck by his profoundly kind spirit. U can see it in his eyes its all around him. I’m so sorry RIP Angel ❤️
Always and forever he'll roll on in our hearts. Thank you so much for sharing Lucy 💛
Took me 45 years to work out how important talking about things is, I hope this helps future guys break down some stereotypes
My biggest disappointment in life was finding out that the statement "Do what you are passionate about as a career and you`ll never work a day in your life" was very very untrue, doing what you are passionate about for work totally kills the passion that drew you to it in the first place...when joy becomes work, all passion is sucked out from it...
Hobbies are my jam. Work is....work.
I get most of my joy and feelings of accomplishment when I'm not being payed to do it.
@@stefandomagalski3722 Yup, that`s what I have learned too in my 30 years in the workforce...
straight facts
My parents always told me "work a job that allows you to enjoy what you love" ...meaning, work a job that pays enough to enjoy your hobbies/what you love AND that gives you the TIME to do it.
@@mollycollins498 you clearly had two great and well balanced parents...I toast them both.
this is such a powerful story..I know this journey well.skating and surfing have been saviours for me growing up. the community ,,the challenges and the excitement give me so much joy..
ben was an amazing skater and by all accounts a beautiful human. its so sad his life ended like this,, he had so much to offer..
the foundation is an incredible idea and I sincerely hope it brings solace to his friends and family in offering help and the tools to cope to so many...thnks for telling this story..Rip in Paradise brother!!
Amazing piece, thanks for putting this together and thanks to the Ben Raemers Foundation for the work they do ❤️
I watched a boneless tutorial by Ben and I thought “this guy is the most goofy (no pun) and happy skater I’ve ever seen”. So devastating you’ll forever be missed Ben.
This is common for depressive people.
this is both heartbreaking and beautiful. “you are loved.”
The sister has quite a way with words to describe their childhood, Ben and her feelings towards the all situation.
This is like the old Vice. Thank you. Good job on part of the Foundation. Your doing a very very important job by filling a void. We still love you Ben.
RIP, Ben 🙏🕊️ The hardest part of life most times is literally just being in it. Depression & anxiety are a daily battle for so many of us
Having a son who loves skateboarding I hope he grows up knowing he’s loved no matter what and I hope he continues to love skateboarding, he’s a natural and I couldn’t be more proud of him I just hope he knows how much he is loved an cherished ..
Thank you for making this video honestly after loosing so many people close to me due to suicide or overdose this video definitely hit home but it was worth the watch that’s for sure and gave hope!!
At 45 I have a Ma who knows that skating has been the joy in my life for 30+ years, I'm too battered to skate much now (due to a genetic condition, not skating ironically), but even as busted as I am she still supports my skating on days when I can. We both know the repercussions of a fall could be tough, but life is tough anyway, and skating makes me feel good inside in a way nothing else does. I know I have her love and support, and it's always been important to me at any age.
My birthday was a few days ago and she gave me the money to get some new trucks. I'm sure she'd rather I didn't skate, but skating has been my joy since I was a kid. Sometimes all you can do is give someone your love and support and hope for the best.
I've got my own son, with his own unique challenges now, and all that love and support that I got from my Ma is being funnelled into him now because I know how much of an impact it has on a kid. Choose happiness, choose family, choose passion, choose love.
You're a great parent, and you're never too old to learn how to skate. If he's talented he might have got it from you!
There used to be two older gentleman in the nineties, in pinstripe suits, overcoats, bowler hats and briefcases that would hit up my local skatepark in South London. A little after six am, they'd get out a broom from behind the quarterpipe and brush all the bits off the concrete, then they'd have a blast around the park for half an hour before going off to work in the financial district in East London. My best friend and I were usually at the skatepark from 10pm till about 7am, as there was street lighting and it was empty overnight most of the time. Those two came early for the same reason, we had a few others that didn't like the prime time too and mostly skated late at night. So you don't have to have eyes on you while you're learning, helps a little with the confidence ;)
Skating has helped me stay here. Going out and having my mind only focused on my tricks helps me so much. Sometimes you feel like the world is against you and it slowly eats away at you. Stay strong everyone
didnt know about this guy until today and i want to say thank you for sharing his story. he is a true legend from this day on and will inspire many people in so many ways possible just from wacthing this Video. Thanks for this again and Rest in Peace Ben Raemers
Ben, forever. My Mom's fiancé, took his own life two weeks before their wedding. We think due to unknown gambling debts, but who really knows when it comes to mental health. It was the most traumatic experience of my life, not so much the loss, but the pain and destruction that his death caused to my Mom, his children, and his family. Always reach out. Always talk if you feel the need. Love. Salute.
What a true legend I remember watching KOTR and Ben always brought a smile to my face.
Amazing documentary. Really positive meaning and creation of emotional stirring that made me wonder about those friends that may just need more from me as a friend. I’ve never heard of Ben Raemers before, but now I’ve seen this, I feel like I’ll remember his name forever.
Thank you for sharing this I'm so proud of the work that's being done , this is so important