Love your teaching! It’s been 30 years and my husband will not change or go to counseling. I’ve been going to counseling for two years now. I’ve changed myself every way to get my husband to love me! Like me! Changed my hair color three times. Short hair , long hair, lost weight and gained weight. I’ve read so many books. I’ve shared with him. He just is emotionally unavailable to me. People outside of our home. Or his work he’s all about them. He’s married to his job. We’ve talked about our love languages. His is affirmation and acts of service. Mine is touch and quality time. I’m so lonely and I feel dehydrated from lack of touch of any kind. We haven’t had any sex , kissing any thing in 17 years. I’ve never been on a vacation. Even free things to go do. He works constantly. No days for me. I’ve read everything I can about being a better wife. I have needs to! I’m very discouraged.
Sherry honey spend a lot of time with God and give this situation to Him. Once you give your marriage to God and get wrapped up in His presence you will feel fulfilled and while that's happening God will work on your husband. You are a dedicated wife I see and that's awesome! Give yourself some rest to let go and let God!💙
@@spirit-filledwarriorminist9696 I have prayed ,cried out to God . He says he’s happy! He doesn’t need counseling or need to read books. I’ve always made everything all about him. When he is home. His favorite things to eat & drink in the icebox. He watches his things on tv. We eat out where he wants to eat. Unless it’s his idea we don’t do it. A lot of Christian teaching seems if I have a problem. It must be something I’m doing wrong. I’m sorry to bother you guys. Thank You for your time!
Sherry, I’m in the same situation as you well not the time length. My intimacy has dropped down in January to three times a month to twice a month to now which is once a month. I’ve even asked if he was seeing someone else and he said no. I asked if he was gay and he said no. I do everything for my husband and he’s happy. But when it comes to sex its an issue. I even asked my hubby what kind of porn he watches so I can please him and do the same. He said to me that it was disgusting to even ask him that and made every excuse. My flesh is getting weak now. I’m faithful to him but now that my needs are not being met. I’m ready to walk away bc he doesn’t treat me as a priority or so I feel. He says he does but only God knows.
@@sherryhornung5894 I can't speak for anyone but myself and honey you are no bother! We should be there for each other encouraging one another. Keep holding on to Jesus and be obedient to God's word. As you consume yourself in the presence of God you will find yourself not worrying about what your husband is not doing and before you know it God will make changes in not only your husband but you as well. As your attention is on Jesus the Holy Spirit will began to do a mighty change in your husband then the work on your marriage will be done to help you and your husband connect as husband and wife. You may feel that your husband needs all the fixing but when you allow the Holy Spirit to work in you He'll show you that there was some things that needed to be fixed in you as well. A marriage won't be right if both parties don't want to address the individual problems that's going on within themselves. Please understand I'm not saying you are the total problem but darling we all have issues that we sometimes aren't aware of. Remember keep your eyes always on Jesus.❤
My wife and I have been together 13 years and after an extremely hot start we both just kind coexisted for a deacade due to stressful life events and both being numbed (her from alcohol and me from methadone) we both came off these things at the beginning of 2021 and the last few months have been heaven on earth. We actually started talking and hanging out after work instead of our old routines and that led to fun and intimacy and amazing mind blowing sex even better than in the beginning. We both fell in love all over again and everyday now is blissful and fun.
Thank you for your Godly and divine wisdom you bring. Ever since I’ve watched your videos I can’t get enough of the wisdom you give me and I’ve been watching you everyday I log into RUclips since last week. May God increase in you and increase you ❤
I have been in a previous sexually verbally abusive controlling marriage before...my now husband of 7 yrs is having issues w me because I have asked for intimate touches or kisses on my forehead or at the minimum a nice word or compliment...the 1st 2 yrs were great...I started to gain wt and he called me names, he became physically abusive during sex under the name of its ok it's just sex...and ordering me like a dog to come and perform,but because after awhile I started shutting down because I got no kind words and I even heard him talking bad about me and belittling me to his brothers and sisters even his grown kids from previous marriage...that really hurt my feelings...he too hit me 2xs..he has not done that in 3 yrs ..but I get nothing but orders barked and get raked over the coals when he comes in late at night or wakes me at 430 or 5 in the morning as I am trying to get ready for work and I don't have a happy attitude...when I asked him about saying nice things or even1 thing or kiss my forehead once he then says he doesn't feel it so therefore he wont and he doesn't care what I say he doesn't want to make love he wants to have sex and im his wife....i cant make myself have happy feelings about sex i am so empty i feel like a piece of carpet i feel like what makes me so unlovable that I can't get my husband to even like me....we were rear-ended 3 yrs ago...my husband was off work for hip surgeries so I worked much overtime trying to make am income ...the stress was so much I have now gained 60lbs more....I've been praying and praying I don't think I can make myself be happy about being ordered and talked down to for sex....he says it's all my fault.... advice please
Get out! My mother stayed with my physically abusive father for 22 years. My father also hit me. My mom did none of us any good by staying with him. I'm having a hard time in my marriage because I never saw a marriage. I only saw abuse, fear, and control. I hope you have no kids involved @@@@ it will scar them for life and def affect their relationships
The man's purpose is to love the woman. When the woman rejects him, she is being the opposite of feminine because it's the woman's purpose to be loved and admired and ravished by her man that God gave her. When she rejects him, it's the same as us rejecting God's love. In turn it pushes the man away and causes a lot of harm. People will get sick, injured, etc and obviously can't make love all the time. But constant rejection is on the same level as abandoning the marriage. It's a very serious offense.
Could you give some advice on how to live a long distance marriage. It has been a year now, my husband works Mon thru friday in Turin, our home is in Rome (700km). He travels back home on Fri morning, arrives around 3pm. Then leaves again on Monday morning. We have 3 teenage children. So we all want him on weekends. We try and videocall at dinner times, but not always as we don't always have same schedule. Thanks.
I am going through menopause and it’s causing so MANY problems in my body. I HAVE NO LIBIDO and I want my husband to understand ans I’ll help him out but he says selfish comments when I’m trying to explain it to him and that completely shuts me down from wanting to touch him. What do I do because I want to serve his needs even when I don’t feel the need.but he degrades me with his comments when I try to communicate with him. Help
He hormonal therapy and take anything you can to uplift your mood and energy and libido. You need to make your libido a priority because it is crucial to the marriage. The man can only understand you to a certain degree. If you're not doing anything to remedy the situation then he won't understand that.
I've done nothing but serve my wife for the last 10 years and she appreciates none of it. It only caused her to look down on me and not be attracted to me.
There's a difference between serving your wife as a man should (provide, love, hear her, protect, etc), and giving in to her every emotional demand and whim. It's likely that you are being a "pleaser" for your wife and not standing up for yourself and for your conjugal rights ordained by God. She needs to acknowledge you and respect you as God tells her to. I would remind her of this in a gentle loving way. And I would be very vulnerable and tell her that what she's doing is killing you. She's hurting herself by making her husband miserable.
I love your talks, but this concept of one person serving the other needs to be balanced where both are serving each other. Not literally one person serving the other. It creates a HUGE imbalance within the relationship.
OMG! I was thinking the SAME THING! It’s almost like he is pushing one-sided sex as Biblical. I agree that it should be BOTH spouses serving each other. (I highly doubt that most men would be happy serving their spouse with no expectation of being served in the bedroom as well.)
Correct. I see women abuse this all the time. I know men do it but I've seen countless women using this principle to essentially rule the entire marriage and get everything they want while the men suffer in silence. The church needs to reteach these messages in a way that makes both genders understand that it's a 2 way street. But I hear so many pastors say "husbands love your wives unconditionally no matter what... But wives, you don't have to always listen to your husband.. And we don't dare say submit because that would mean you're in handmaidens tale"
See i just dont get pleasure. Its ok but it doesnt help i had almost 30 sexual partners prior to marriage. Also physically abused by my dad. And domestic violence household growing up. I wonder if that has anything to do with it
REPENT FOR THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS AT HAND TURN FROM SIN AND TURN TOWARDS RIGHTEOUSNESS THROUGH CHRIST JESUS JESUS CHRIST IS COMING BACK SOON AND WE MUST BE READY FOR WHEN HE COMES BACK
Love your teaching! It’s been 30 years and my husband will not change or go to counseling. I’ve been going to counseling for two years now. I’ve changed myself every way to get my husband to love me! Like me! Changed my hair color three times. Short hair , long hair, lost weight and gained weight. I’ve read so many books. I’ve shared with him. He just is emotionally unavailable to me. People outside of our home. Or his work he’s all about them. He’s married to his job. We’ve talked about our love languages. His is affirmation and acts of service. Mine is touch and quality time. I’m so lonely and I feel dehydrated from lack of touch of any kind. We haven’t had any sex , kissing any thing in 17 years. I’ve never been on a vacation. Even free things to go do. He works constantly. No days for me. I’ve read everything I can about being a better wife. I have needs to! I’m very discouraged.
Sherry honey spend a lot of time with God and give this situation to Him. Once you give your marriage to God and get wrapped up in His presence you will feel fulfilled and while that's happening God will work on your husband. You are a dedicated wife I see and that's awesome! Give yourself some rest to let go and let God!💙
Your husband is one selfish and spiritually corrupted guy. Bless you and I am a guy by the way.
@@spirit-filledwarriorminist9696 I have prayed ,cried out to God . He says he’s happy! He doesn’t need counseling or need to read books. I’ve always made everything all about him. When he is home. His favorite things to eat & drink in the icebox. He watches his things on tv. We eat out where he wants to eat. Unless it’s his idea we don’t do it. A lot of Christian teaching seems if I have a problem. It must be something I’m doing wrong. I’m sorry to bother you guys. Thank You for your time!
Sherry, I’m in the same situation as you well not the time length. My intimacy has dropped down in January to three times a month to twice a month to now which is once a month. I’ve even asked if he was seeing someone else and he said no. I asked if he was gay and he said no. I do everything for my husband and he’s happy. But when it comes to sex its an issue. I even asked my hubby what kind of porn he watches so I can please him and do the same. He said to me that it was disgusting to even ask him that and made every excuse. My flesh is getting weak now. I’m faithful to him but now that my needs are not being met. I’m ready to walk away bc he doesn’t treat me as a priority or so I feel. He says he does but only God knows.
@@sherryhornung5894 I can't speak for anyone but myself and honey you are no bother! We should be there for each other encouraging one another. Keep holding on to Jesus and be obedient to God's word. As you consume yourself in the presence of God you will find yourself not worrying about what your husband is not doing and before you know it God will make changes in not only your husband but you as well. As your attention is on Jesus the Holy Spirit will began to do a mighty change in your husband then the work on your marriage will be done to help you and your husband connect as husband and wife. You may feel that your husband needs all the fixing but when you allow the Holy Spirit to work in you He'll show you that there was some things that needed to be fixed in you as well. A marriage won't be right if both parties don't want to address the individual problems that's going on within themselves. Please understand I'm not saying you are the total problem but darling we all have issues that we sometimes aren't aware of. Remember keep your eyes always on Jesus.❤
My wife and I have been together 13 years and after an extremely hot start we both just kind coexisted for a deacade due to stressful life events and both being numbed (her from alcohol and me from methadone) we both came off these things at the beginning of 2021 and the last few months have been heaven on earth. We actually started talking and hanging out after work instead of our old routines and that led to fun and intimacy and amazing mind blowing sex even better than in the beginning. We both fell in love all over again and everyday now is blissful and fun.
Fat Tony - God bless you both!! What a GREAT testimony!!
Wish I could get my wife off of her phone long enough to do that.
A servant spirit is the greater spirit
A servant spirit is borne from a place
Of security
But eventually you become starved due to your needs not being met.
You can’t be intimate with a selfish person.
Everthing is not for everyone. Something you just need to stay sacred
We love all your teachings thank you
Security
Open and honest communication
Non sexual affection
Leadership
👍
Y’all are always talking about the things I need to work on as I live the kind of living most living never find
Awesome teaching. I’m so blessed to have you both.
Thank you for your Godly and divine wisdom you bring. Ever since I’ve watched your videos I can’t get enough of the wisdom you give me and I’ve been watching you everyday I log into RUclips since last week. May God increase in you and increase you ❤
This is great wisdom on sexual fulfillment and serving in marriage.
I have been in a previous sexually verbally abusive controlling marriage before...my now husband of 7 yrs is having issues w me because I have asked for intimate touches or kisses on my forehead or at the minimum a nice word or compliment...the 1st 2 yrs were great...I started to gain wt and he called me names, he became physically abusive during sex under the name of its ok it's just sex...and ordering me like a dog to come and perform,but because after awhile I started shutting down because I got no kind words and I even heard him talking bad about me and belittling me to his brothers and sisters even his grown kids from previous marriage...that really hurt my feelings...he too hit me 2xs..he has not done that in 3 yrs ..but I get nothing but orders barked and get raked over the coals when he comes in late at night or wakes me at 430 or 5 in the morning as I am trying to get ready for work and I don't have a happy attitude...when I asked him about saying nice things or even1 thing or kiss my forehead once he then says he doesn't feel it so therefore he wont and he doesn't care what I say he doesn't want to make love he wants to have sex and im his wife....i cant make myself have happy feelings about sex i am so empty i feel like a piece of carpet i feel like what makes me so unlovable that I can't get my husband to even like me....we were rear-ended 3 yrs ago...my husband was off work for hip surgeries so I worked much overtime trying to make am income
...the stress was so much I have now gained 60lbs more....I've been praying and praying I don't think I can make myself be happy about being ordered and talked down to for sex....he says it's all my fault.... advice please
Get out! My mother stayed with my physically abusive father for 22 years. My father also hit me. My mom did none of us any good by staying with him. I'm having a hard time in my marriage because I never saw a marriage. I only saw abuse, fear, and control. I hope you have no kids involved @@@@ it will scar them for life and def affect their relationships
The man's purpose is to love the woman. When the woman rejects him, she is being the opposite of feminine because it's the woman's purpose to be loved and admired and ravished by her man that God gave her. When she rejects him, it's the same as us rejecting God's love. In turn it pushes the man away and causes a lot of harm. People will get sick, injured, etc and obviously can't make love all the time. But constant rejection is on the same level as abandoning the marriage. It's a very serious offense.
I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHICH STRENGTHENS ME
PHIL 4:13
Could you give some advice on how to live a long distance marriage. It has been a year now, my husband works Mon thru friday in Turin, our home is in Rome (700km).
He travels back home on Fri morning, arrives around 3pm. Then leaves again on Monday morning.
We have 3 teenage children.
So we all want him on weekends.
We try and videocall at dinner times, but not always as we don't always have same schedule.
Thanks.
This is good
God wants to meet our needs and desires.
I never was satisfied with sex when I was married. He was abusive.
The issue isn't with sex. It's with the abuse.
Awesome
I love this thank you Love from guy and Leanne
I am going through menopause and it’s causing so MANY problems in my body. I HAVE NO LIBIDO and I want my husband to understand ans I’ll help him out but he says selfish comments when I’m trying to explain it to him and that completely shuts me down from wanting to touch him. What do I do because I want to serve his needs even when I don’t feel the need.but he degrades me with his comments when I try to communicate with him. Help
He hormonal therapy and take anything you can to uplift your mood and energy and libido. You need to make your libido a priority because it is crucial to the marriage. The man can only understand you to a certain degree. If you're not doing anything to remedy the situation then he won't understand that.
I've done nothing but serve my wife for the last 10 years and she appreciates none of it. It only caused her to look down on me and not be attracted to me.
It is likely because you are serving like a woman and not like a man.
There's a difference between serving your wife as a man should (provide, love, hear her, protect, etc), and giving in to her every emotional demand and whim. It's likely that you are being a "pleaser" for your wife and not standing up for yourself and for your conjugal rights ordained by God. She needs to acknowledge you and respect you as God tells her to. I would remind her of this in a gentle loving way. And I would be very vulnerable and tell her that what she's doing is killing you. She's hurting herself by making her husband miserable.
The Sabbath is biblical and on the seventh day (Saturday) not any other.. Obey God's laws the way it is written
I love your talks, but this concept of one person serving the other needs to be balanced where both are serving each other. Not literally one person serving the other. It creates a HUGE imbalance within the relationship.
OMG! I was thinking the SAME THING! It’s almost like he is pushing one-sided sex as Biblical. I agree that it should be BOTH spouses serving each other. (I highly doubt that most men would be happy serving their spouse with no expectation of being served in the bedroom as well.)
Correct. I see women abuse this all the time. I know men do it but I've seen countless women using this principle to essentially rule the entire marriage and get everything they want while the men suffer in silence. The church needs to reteach these messages in a way that makes both genders understand that it's a 2 way street. But I hear so many pastors say "husbands love your wives unconditionally no matter what... But wives, you don't have to always listen to your husband.. And we don't dare say submit because that would mean you're in handmaidens tale"
See i just dont get pleasure. Its ok but it doesnt help i had almost 30 sexual partners prior to marriage. Also physically abused by my dad. And domestic violence household growing up. I wonder if that has anything to do with it
REPENT FOR THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS AT HAND TURN FROM SIN AND TURN TOWARDS RIGHTEOUSNESS THROUGH CHRIST JESUS
JESUS CHRIST IS COMING BACK SOON AND WE MUST BE READY FOR WHEN HE COMES BACK