I really LOVE your videos with Father. HE IS SUCH A GOOD SHEPHERD. He INSTRUCTS BASED ON TRUE DOCTRINE & TEACHINGS. He does clarify what are NON NEGOTIABLE with our Catholic faith. WE NEED MORE GOOD PRIEST LIKE HIM. There are many who mislead the faithful.
An interesting conversation with Fr. Cristiano... A difficult one though. I've seen so many of my friends and family who have suffered when their partners have not kept the commitment and they are punished for it. Human beings are indeed so broken. In today's world to live your marriage as a sacrament where both partners are equally invested spiritually is such a challenge. We need to pray for marriages all over the world.
Whrn my husband and i separated two years ago I was agnostic, but looking for God. I ended up going to a Catholic Church amd hearing the church's stance on dicorce pushed me to mend my marriage. My husband is still an unbeliever and I'm still not Catholic (still considering it), but that hard line pushed me to get my marriage back on track. Two years later and we are back together and now trying to start a family.
@@michaelsix9684I became Catholic and nothing changed concerning my civil marriage with an atheist , it only became more challenging. Don't give people false hope, because expecting my marriage will change once I become Catholic almost cost me my faith in God.
I think a lot of problems come from the romanticizing of marriage. It’s not a fairytale where you walk into the sunset hand in hand and live happily ever after. Or like pictures painted in movies and magazines. Marriage is a vocation to serve God as husband and wife and raise a Christian family. Especially now when you see those emotional wedding videos where everybody is crying and there’s fireworks and dancing and the newlyweds serenading each other like it’s a poetry competition. We should take the time to prepare young people for marriage in a proper way. It can save them from a lot of disillusionment.
Yes Claudia you are very right. We should stop romanticizing of marriage n prepare young people mentally and spritually about marriage in the right way. It will defenetly save lot marriages from ending up in divorce.
marriage is a vocation like religious life, it has serious responsibilities and eternal consequences, not all of us are called to do it, it should help you reach heaven not block you from it
what is most lacking today is role modeling for marriage, we have more single households than married ones, people live what they learn, if they don't see married life role modeled in a loving and faithful way, they won't do it well as an adult
Thank you Father! We so need truthful but compassionate explanations about the Church’s teachings on marriage. We are called to rise above our natural passions to follow Christ 🙏🏻
Thank you Father and Ken I certainly needed to hear this today because Mike and I are going through one of those ugly Chapters of a 35 year old marriage? So please keep us in your papers. ❤❤❤
This is an excellent talk! This would be an excellent presentation at pre-Cana as to how serious the church holds the sacrament of marriage. A common thought with many young couples is how the world views marriage and love and how “disposable” marriage is now in the secular world. Thank you very much for the truthful teachings! God bless you both and the work you do.
Please pray for me and my kids and husband we are in bad day's, please pray for my kids for their good health and to increase their faith in God and do well in their studies and extra activities in sports, and have the prayerful and peace in the family, also pray for we brothers and sisters and our families and our old parents and all our children in the family in Jesus name Amen 🙏
Marriage and childbearing are the crosses Christ talked so much ...he said carry your cross ..he did not said give crosses to others...my case was very complicated. My marriage was declared null here in USA and confirmed by Rome tribunal but decided to stay single to raise the children
Perfect sound teaching on this most touching matter of marriage. I believe once you get through the storm of the ups and downs of married life, you will be grateful you didn't give up like so many in our society do, sad to say, only to find more problems than before. Thank you and may God Bless you Father Christino and Ken. Steven. U.K.
I was married for 20 years. I went to that marriage wanting to be forever. there were red flags, but being someone in love and never having serious relationship I didn't think very much of it. I thought that's the way it is. Degradation started gradually. I was belittled, made believe that I don't know anything, and could not make any good decisions. My husband always had time for himself and his buddies, but very little for the family. I felt that we were a weight to him. I am not going to go in to details what led to our separation. That was 10 years ago. I recently discovered that my husband is a narcissist and will never change. We are no longer together but not divorced. I am praying for him to return to Christ, but I don't want him back. Sometimes I am thinking of filing for civil divorce and then marriage annulment. But then I stop and think about it. I knew that the marriage is forever and my vowel was made in front of God.
I’m standing for my marriage too. My husband left me and our three children 2 years ago. He filed for divorce. Tomorrow is our divorce trial. I don’t want to be divorced. I want him to come home. He’s an addict. I believe in the indissolubility of marriage. You are not alone ❤
once someone commits full blown adultery the Catholic Church says that the offended spouse is greatly encouraged to take them back but not under 100% obligation. People should think twice before they commit adultery.
@@jessicasmith9599 I'm so sorry. I was in same situation 4 years ago. To not be able to see my kids everyday is very painful. My wife is engaged to the other man now and I have asked the Church for a Declaration of nulity.
@TheSunnyman3 I think you misunderstood me. I wanted my husband back, but he did even attempt to reach out. Being a narcissist he thinks he did nothing wrong. And after 10 years being alone I am used to it
Iwona, I respect your belief in the indissolubility of marriage. I had my devout Catholic grandmother as an example of a Catholic marriage. He left her with two young children and she never married again and was able to raise her children in the Faith. The people who claim that it’s not possible to live according to Christ’s commands, I question if they would be able to die for Christ if it was an actual situation they were faced with. Luke 9:24 🙏🏻
I've said it before and I'll say it again: such a wise priest you have as a friend! Although Fr. only mentioned prior sacramental marriages, I do believe since the Church will not marry someone who was married prior even under a civil ceremony (without an annulment), that implies even a civil marriage counts as a marriage (albeit adulteress) and all the post marriage rules apply.
Happy 14th Anniversary to a beautiful couple that blesses all who follow you and your podcasts. You are sooo right on a few accounts. Marrying your friend that you've gotten to know very well, before any romantic notions. My mother used to say it is more important to "like" the person you are marrying than even "loving" them. Of course you should love them, but the love emotion can be blinding if we aren't careful. Marrying someone who shares your beliefs in moral, ethical, and faith matters will definitely avoid some very hard times. The chair analogy was excellent, because I think it gets into some thinking they'll change the future spouse, but if they don't want to change it's a huge heartache, and can create much resentment, unhappiness, and arguing. Thank you for all you do for us. Btw! You 2 are as cute as ever. From marriage photo to 14 years later your happiness shines through. A great example for all! God bless and keep you for another 14 years and beyond. Love you!!
This is such a deep topic. My heart is heavy seeing and hearing of all the troubles and attack on the holy sacrament. Now I can see how holy and sacred marriage is just seeing all the attacks. Its just like the attacks on the sacredness of life. Anything thats important to God will be attacked by the devil. Thats why its so important for us to be very careful as Father emphasised , the way we handle it is the gateway to heaven or hell.
Please pray for the transformation of my husband. Restoration of my marriage and my family! Help us pray to destroy the intergenerational curse over my family! May my husband realize what he has done to our family!🙏🙏🙏
Some things ate difficult to hear because it's the truth...& many of us have been duped by the world...we seek true peace & inner freedom...& only the TRUTH SETS US FREE...& oh my thank God for His PATIENCE, MERCY & GRACE...because I'm one that's had 2 healing annulments & finding I'm still a major work in progress. Jesus together here we pray for all of us on this journey of faith ...to know, love & serve our Father thru Holy Mother Church❤️🙏
I only wish I had know about the blessings the Church teaches decades ago! Thank you so much for addressing these issues for those of us who are older & those with a past outside of Catholicism.
I'm finally ready to hear this. Thank you Father and Ken for the honest truth. My wife left 4.5 years ago, and I received my divorce certificate in October of last year which allows me to apply for an annulment. I sent it in on Tuesday. Please pray for me, my wife, and our 3 kids. May God's will be done.
The catholic priests say one thing and the church does another. After 30 of marriage my wife filed for civil divorce and it was the most painful time of my life but then she filed for an annulment it was easily given to us. I read her petition application and her only witness testimony and it was very inaccurate. How can the Catholic Church say that when you have a sacramental marriage, god is present to seal your marriage but when you file for an annulment there are three human judges that decide if your marriage is valid or not.
If you read the annulment paper it states that the annulment is not final, your conscience is. If believe it was sacramental then do not remarry. You can also repeal the annulment to a court in Rome. Sometimes when they look at it, they reverse the judgment of the local church court. If your wife has intentionally lied in order to deceive the annulment process then she will have to answer for that in the end. If so and she remarries she is commiting adultery regardless how she may have appeased her conscience. Remember people can rationalize themselves into almost anything.
I would love to see a video on CCC 2364 and Canon 1151. There is a lot of persistent mortal sin happening out there inside of marriages and Catholics who believe more in the sexual revolution than in what the church teaches.
Thank you so much for sharing this important information . I Hope the Lord Will always guide and protect me from anything that is Not right thing for me to do. Amen🙏
Congratulations and happy anniversary you two! ❤️. We will celebrate 51 yrs. this Nov. and dated 5 yrs. during school. So true, marry your best friend and remember that no one is perfect. I have no real words of wisdom because each relationship is a journey of discovery, faith, learning, adapting, growing, sharing, loving, and forgiving. God bless you on this journey and as you know, marriage takes three. Best wishes for your continued success In marriage and life. ❤️🙏
Thank you Father for a very honest opinion on marriage I an separated and I have a full relationship with God. It was very lonely in the beginning but I found God abd he us my spouse my friend and companion. I am in.ministry so I know I can not be in a relationship .My marriage was very toxic and I believed God removed me I want to go to heaven not hell. I believe God comes first. Amen.
We need a very solid moral framework to find peace in our lives. There are difficulties that couples face these days more than before as well. I think the reason why couples head to the courts is because in their minds they know there is an easy way out, this is where they can go when difficulties arise, instead of working things out for themselves. Besides once a couple head to the courts for separation, the process itself causes more burdens on each person in that family unit.
My husband decided not to get counseling, and chose divorce. I was partially relieved at the time because of not being able to speak/communicate as he wouldn't let me. I felt tortured. My dream of marriage, my life... broken. It's a tragedy.
Something that needs to be widely known too is the difficulty & divorce rates for 2nd or 3rd marriages is even higher than 1st...so for those in difficult marriages thinking it's the easy way out or it will be better next time...my advice is,...don't fall for the lies...know Thyself...Love God & with Him...all things are possible
& a thought to consider for loneliness...if you fall in love with Jesus...that loneliness goes away as you seek a good relationship with Him, His Church & serving with the gifts God has given
A question that had many answers by many priests thus far: What if one was only civilly married, not in the catholic church, and the partner had already been married twice before, in a church of christ, not catholic. Is an annulment needed?
From a realistic standpoint, there needs to be hard. Consequences to not making good choices. The good that can come from such a thing is that others see your example and do a better job on their own marriages. Taking more care to choose better partners.
My mother was Protestant and my father was Catholic. They were married in the Nazarene Church. My father was divorced before he married my mom. I was born 5 months after my parents married. My father's first marriage was in the Catholic Church. Was his marriage to my mother valid? I have heard it said that if a child is born less than 6 months after the marriage that child is still considered to be born out of wedlock-is this true?
One question for Father. Some people have said that because they received prior instructions from a priest in the past regarding the invalidity of their sacramental marriage, which might have been misunderstood by either parties at that time, (the priest and the person), that they are not in sin or error if they have chosen to remarry and so they can continue to be in communion with the church.
My mother gave us, 9 children, this advice “if you divorce and marry again, you only trade one set of problems for another “ Unless you and especially your children are being horribly abused, then work on being more aware of doing things to please your mate. Goodness begets goodness. Eight of my brothers and sisters were married until death. One member was divorced early in the marriage but married again until death.
💔✝️🙏🙏✝️😥 protection from non-Catholic influence upon loved one .... dismantling Sacramental Marriage .... untreated previous Relationship Trauma .... avoiding Confession, Holy Mass, spiritual direction, Catholic teaching .... LORD HAVE MERCY
I need guidance Father. We were married by an Eastern Catholic Pastor, does that mean our marriage is not sacramental? Is it considered a valid marriage in the Catholic Church? Please help😢
Why wouldn't it be valid, all priests in communion with the Bishop of Rome, including all the Eastern Catholic Chruches/Rites are able to administer the sacraments.
Hello. Can a Catholic marry a divorced person who was never married in the Catholic Church for their first marriage? Would that require an annulment as well?
How about a Non Christian separated man, who comes to Catholic faith by providence of God.. Whether he is free to get married in Church after Baptism and other Sacraments? Whether his previous marriage gets automatically nullified if his wife had abandoned him? How the Pauline Privilege works in this case?
I would like to know that if you are divorced and your spouse is still living, can you now start dating and proceed toward marriage in the church. Thank you.
Does a divorced man need to have an annullment to be able to date or have a chaste relationship? Is it adultry if he does not have the annullment to havr a chaste relationship
My spouse changed immediately after we left the wedding reception. He became abusive, toxic, and a totally unchristian person. I don't believe we were ever sacramentally married, though we were married in the Catholic Church. I stayed in that hell for 33 years CRYING OUT FOR THE SACRAMENTAL GRACES THAT ROLLED OFF HIM LIKE WATER OFF A DUCK'S BACK. I will be lonely for the rest of my life. I would rather handcuff myself to a gorilla than get married again. I don't want another relationship.
The appreciation for the objectivity of the inherent goodness of marriage and the indisoluability of marriage is predicated upon the faith that both husband and wife would have in the sacrament as well as objective reality which can often be eclipsed and subsumed by the tyranny of emotions.
It’s so widespread, it’s impossible to correct the errors, so many remarried and have kids and believe that they’re marriage is valid under God , what they must do to save their souls? 😞
I am not even Catholic but it is biblically correct and it's a shame so few believers recognize that fact - marriage is until death, period. Yes there are instances when separation is better for people in abusive situations and such, but unfortunately, the truth is the truth.
From personal experience, my church marriage was a mistake. He waa an alcoholic. He never went to Church, after 2 Retrovaille failures, HE filed for divorce, so he could marry someone else. I went thru the Church marriage so would not be living in sin. No kids involved. This was not our 1st marriage. Bit it was our 1st in The Catholic Church. Now I am waiting for my annulment gets approved. I miss receiving Nd my health worsen. Its been 16 months without Receiving The Eucharistic....
Does a divorced man need to have an annullment to be able to date or have a chaste relationship? Is it adultry if he does not have the annullment to havr a chaste relationship
The problem is when a wife cheats, it's just over, whether the Sacrament has taken place or not. A cheating woman robs a man of his most fundamental masculinity when she does it, and that's just not the case when the husband cheats. Islam and Judaism (old covenant Judaism) both have laws that reflect this distinction, where is the Christian acknowledgement that a wife cheating is worse because it throws a man's entire position in his family (his paternity) into question
Please pray for me 🙏 I'm in a relationship where I am waiting for his Declaration of Annulment. He didn't know an Annulment was possible or what the grounds for a non existent or forced marriage were.
If procreation is the primary purpose of marriage, then the only necessary ingredient missing would be inability to go through the motions of procreating.
Someone who cheats has their own issues. Someone who divorces because they were cheated on has their own issues. Jesus says if you remarry you are cheating. So if you divorce a spouse for cheating and then remarry you just did the same thing. It's really that simple. I know getting cheated on hurts, but it doesn't give you the right to do it back.
That's why marriage is one of the sacraments. It's a COVENANT you made with GOD. It can either sanctify you both through your trials and be together in heaven or make each of you go hell bound just because you didn't persevere.
That is not how Catholics interpret that verse. Infidelity is not a valid reason for an annulment. Like he says in this video, Catholics interpret that as, “unless the marriage is unlawful”. We can see this is correct because in the other Gospel where Jesus says this the disciples freak out and say things like, “that’s rough. If that’s the case no one should get married at all”. In their society, divorce because of adultery was accepted and considered justified. The reason they freak out is because they understand Jesus is saying that adultery is not a valid justification for divorce and they think that is too harsh.
just 2 stats to think about -- marriage rates in the US are now the lowest we have ever recorded, 40% of all children born today are born out of wedlock, we wonder why our society has so many problems, marriage is very critical in forming a stable and healthy society, since the 70s marriage has been under siege and losing ground
I think you guys got it right initially in the video by saying marriage is for life and there is no divorce, but then the whole idea of annulment is ridiculous!!! So your telling me 2 people go throught weeks if not months of classes to make sure of what marriage is, then make vows in front of hundreds of people and to God, all recorded legally w certificates....and then you when someone wants out lets pretend it never happened....come on.
People can make vows they have no intention of keeping. If your wife says, “you knew what you were getting into, I was never going to be a good Catholic wife!”, then that’s fraud, perpetrated on your wedding day which is exactly the kind of situation annulments are for.
Thank you for the video! I especially like what you said at the end Father about staying close to Jesus. To really know the truth we need to stay close to the truth. And when we are close to Jesus we won't be feeling lonely. As an extra step, for those asking for a declaration of nullity, it should be a requirement they not be in a relationship prior to applying for one. As Father says, you can't properly discern when you're romantically involved with someone already. Let's recognise the real author of divorce, Satan. He attacks the domestic church because it's a reflection of the Holy Trinity.
I have seen all of these scenarios, but think it should of also been mentioned that they need to be open for children. My ex said he only wanted 2 children the night of the honeymoon and it was a highly abusive relationship and I got an annulment
I like Pope Francis statement on the fact that many matrimonies are null because the couple did not fully understood it was a spiritual commitment for life. Sometimes they are more social contract. Its a vice in consent, but I wonder if Canon Law actually accepts them as such just arguing there was still not full understanding of the commitment. Can anyone more knowledgeable on the topic provide a good answer? This is the video the Pope speaks about it: ruclips.net/video/0IcbhHS-onA/видео.html
It think the matter is very complicated. Yes Jesus said no one should separate what God has bound. If Jesus was physically present today, I doubt he would force someone to stay bound with someone who is violent or abuse of any kind. I takes 2 to build a healthy relationship.💖💖
Christ set the example for us of how to treat our spouse as He called His Church the bride. He suffered at the hands of His Bride/spouse even to death by her hand for her salvation. He wont force anyone but He would ask "Did you vow before God then obedience is required?" and then would ask them "to pick up their cross and follow Him?" We can know this would be His response base on what happened after He ate with the sinners and tax collectors they became His disciples and suffered well for the salvation for others.
@@nathanjones3621 Just out of curiosity, how can one know whether they were not married to "satan" in the first place.... it can hide behind a beautiful groom or bride and then show the true colors right after. Some marriage relationships seems to be a living hell. Prayers are needed human beings to come back in the Love of God, the basics of who we are! 🙏🙏🙏
@@MsBernie64 because God made man and woman good as it says in Genesis. It sounds like your implying God makes some people evil and hell bound from birth. I hope I am misunderstanding this "Satan" remark. Yes, because of the fall of Adam we suffer from concupiscence but God has made us all for Heaven and all have the potential of saying yes to Him and His will. It is real love that holds on to the hope for the salvation of the other and to give up because one suffers hurt or "trauma" is a hardening of the heart and does not follow the example of Christ and His love for His bride. I do not advocate for staying under the same roof if abuse is happening but to instead continue to work with aiding ones spouse in any way possible to reconcile the negetive acts so as to allow Christ to shine through oneself and the spouse. I would encourage people to look to the Saints examples as well. One that comes to mind is Blessed Anna-Maria Taigi.
My ex husband and I were together for 23 years. Married 16 of those years. We got together when I was 16, he was 17. We have 2 children together. We got married by the DJ first, then in the Catholic church because I wanted to be right by God and the church. I also was praying praying praying my ex would get it together with hanging out with his friends and constant cheating. He did not. After all those years and nothing changing, a lot of tears...more than anyone can count, sooo much I can't even say here, I finally said no more. I am with someone else and plan to marry and am getting ready to start the anullment process. I am leaving it in God's hands because the same way God doesn't like divorce he also gave grounds for divorce. How many times can one be continually cheated on and not actually have a relationship with that person and stay married!!?? I stuck around for the kids in hopes he would change. I divorced him over 10 years ago. I was in major hope things would change when we married and they never did.
Get all future videos by email: kenandjanelle.com/
Praying for all difficult marriages that God would restore every marriage according to His Will.
Amen
Amen! 🙏💖
Please pray for our marriage. Not to fall into temptation. Neither one of us. Amen
I really LOVE your videos with Father. HE IS SUCH A GOOD SHEPHERD. He INSTRUCTS BASED ON TRUE DOCTRINE & TEACHINGS. He does clarify what are NON NEGOTIABLE with our Catholic faith. WE NEED MORE GOOD PRIEST LIKE HIM. There are many who mislead the faithful.
Thank you Ken and thank you Fr. Chris for beautifully and prayerfully explaining the importance of Marriage. God bless you both!
An interesting conversation with Fr. Cristiano... A difficult one though. I've seen so many of my friends and family who have suffered when their partners have not kept the commitment and they are punished for it. Human beings are indeed so broken. In today's world to live your marriage as a sacrament where both partners are equally invested spiritually is such a challenge. We need to pray for marriages all over the world.
Whrn my husband and i separated two years ago I was agnostic, but looking for God. I ended up going to a Catholic Church amd hearing the church's stance on dicorce pushed me to mend my marriage. My husband is still an unbeliever and I'm still not Catholic (still considering it), but that hard line pushed me to get my marriage back on track. Two years later and we are back together and now trying to start a family.
hope it works out, please know if you become Catholic God will give you special graces to help you in married life
@@michaelsix9684I became Catholic and nothing changed concerning my civil marriage with an atheist , it only became more challenging. Don't give people false hope, because expecting my marriage will change once I become Catholic almost cost me my faith in God.
Yes, I would say that if the Church helped you repair your relationship to such a good level, maybe it’s something to strongly consider!! 🙏🙏
I think a lot of problems come from the romanticizing of marriage. It’s not a fairytale where you walk into the sunset hand in hand and live happily ever after. Or like pictures painted in movies and magazines. Marriage is a vocation to serve God as husband and wife and raise a Christian family. Especially now when you see those emotional wedding videos where everybody is crying and there’s fireworks and dancing and the newlyweds serenading each other like it’s a poetry competition. We should take the time to prepare young people for marriage in a proper way. It can save them from a lot of disillusionment.
Yes Claudia you are very right. We should stop romanticizing of marriage n prepare young people mentally and spritually about marriage in the right way. It will defenetly save lot marriages from ending up in divorce.
@@Roman-LabradorJesus perfected chastity and marriage, we must follow Jesus commandments, thanks be to God.
@@Roman-Labrador God is listening and answering your prayers, in his own way which is best for you,stay humble and keep praying and asking!
marriage is a vocation like religious life, it has serious responsibilities and eternal consequences, not all of us are called to do it, it should help you reach heaven not block you from it
what is most lacking today is role modeling for marriage, we have more single households than married ones, people live what they learn, if they don't see married life role modeled in a loving and faithful way, they won't do it well as an adult
I need this, please Lord God help me🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Thank you Father! We so need truthful but compassionate explanations about the Church’s teachings on marriage. We are called to rise above our natural passions to follow Christ 🙏🏻
Please pray for all the broken families
God bless you all forever
The very last bit on friendship is refreshing, as we also need true friends!! 😊
Thank you Father and Ken I certainly needed to hear this today because Mike and I are going through one of those ugly Chapters of a 35 year old marriage? So please keep us in your papers.
❤❤❤
This is an excellent talk! This would be an excellent presentation at pre-Cana as to how serious the church holds the sacrament of marriage. A common thought with many young couples is how the world views marriage and love and how “disposable” marriage is now in the secular world.
Thank you very much for the truthful teachings! God bless you both and the work you do.
Thanks for your feedback and for watching. God bless.
Thank you Fr Christine for giving us the TRUTH which is from our Lord’s teaching. God bless you!
Please pray for me and my kids and husband we are in bad day's, please pray for my kids for their good health and to increase their faith in God and do well in their studies and extra activities in sports, and have the prayerful and peace in the family, also pray for we brothers and sisters and our families and our old parents and all our children in the family in Jesus name Amen 🙏
🙏🏽
Marriage and childbearing are the crosses Christ talked so much ...he said carry your cross ..he did not said give crosses to others...my case was very complicated. My marriage was declared null here in USA and confirmed by Rome tribunal but decided to stay single to raise the children
Perfect sound teaching on this most touching matter of marriage. I believe once you get through the storm of the ups and downs of married life, you will be grateful you didn't give up like so many in our society do, sad to say, only to find more problems than before. Thank you and may God Bless you Father Christino and Ken. Steven. U.K.
This priest is spot on! Beautiful Soul and Servant of God!
Thank you Father for teaching real Catechism and not trying to bend the true teaching in order to please others. True man of God 🙏
excellent statement my friend, god bless
I was married for 20 years. I went to that marriage wanting to be forever. there were red flags, but being someone in love and never having serious relationship I didn't think very much of it. I thought that's the way it is. Degradation started gradually. I was belittled, made believe that I don't know anything, and could not make any good decisions. My husband always had time for himself and his buddies, but very little for the family. I felt that we were a weight to him. I am not going to go in to details what led to our separation. That was 10 years ago. I recently discovered that my husband is a narcissist and will never change. We are no longer together but not divorced. I am praying for him to return to Christ, but I don't want him back. Sometimes I am thinking of filing for civil divorce and then marriage annulment. But then I stop and think about it. I knew that the marriage is forever and my vowel was made in front of God.
I’m standing for my marriage too. My husband left me and our three children 2 years ago. He filed for divorce. Tomorrow is our divorce trial. I don’t want to be divorced. I want him to come home. He’s an addict. I believe in the indissolubility of marriage. You are not alone ❤
once someone commits full blown adultery the Catholic Church says that the offended spouse is greatly encouraged to take them back but not under 100% obligation. People should think twice before they commit adultery.
@@jessicasmith9599 I'm so sorry. I was in same situation 4 years ago. To not be able to see my kids everyday is very painful. My wife is engaged to the other man now and I have asked the Church for a Declaration of nulity.
@TheSunnyman3 I think you misunderstood me. I wanted my husband back, but he did even attempt to reach out. Being a narcissist he thinks he did nothing wrong. And after 10 years being alone I am used to it
Iwona, I respect your belief in the indissolubility of marriage. I had my devout Catholic grandmother as an example of a Catholic marriage. He left her with two young children and she never married again and was able to raise her children in the Faith. The people who claim that it’s not possible to live according to Christ’s commands, I question if they would be able to die for Christ if it was an actual situation they were faced with.
Luke 9:24 🙏🏻
I've said it before and I'll say it again: such a wise priest you have as a friend! Although Fr. only mentioned prior sacramental marriages, I do believe since the Church will not marry someone who was married prior even under a civil ceremony (without an annulment), that implies even a civil marriage counts as a marriage (albeit adulteress) and all the post marriage rules apply.
I have been looking forward to this video. 14yrs Wow, great start
Happy 14th Anniversary to a beautiful couple that blesses all who follow you and your podcasts. You are sooo right on a few accounts. Marrying your friend that you've gotten to know very well, before any romantic notions. My mother used to say it is more important to "like" the person you are marrying than even "loving" them. Of course you should love them, but the love emotion can be blinding if we aren't careful. Marrying someone who shares your beliefs in moral, ethical, and faith matters will definitely avoid some very hard times. The chair analogy was excellent, because I think it gets into some thinking they'll change the future spouse, but if they don't want to change it's a huge heartache, and can create much resentment, unhappiness, and arguing.
Thank you for all you do for us. Btw! You 2 are as cute as ever. From marriage photo to 14 years later your happiness shines through. A great example for all! God bless and keep you for another 14 years and beyond. Love you!!
This is such a deep topic. My heart is heavy seeing and hearing of all the troubles and attack on the holy sacrament. Now I can see how holy and sacred marriage is just seeing all the attacks. Its just like the attacks on the sacredness of life. Anything thats important to God will be attacked by the devil. Thats why its so important for us to be very careful as Father emphasised , the way we handle it is the gateway to heaven or hell.
Please pray for the transformation of my husband. Restoration of my marriage and my family! Help us pray to destroy the intergenerational curse over my family! May my husband realize what he has done to our family!🙏🙏🙏
Wherever the parish that this priest belongs to is blessed to have him. God bless you father!
Real teaching of Jesus Christ. It's hard saying, but prophetic. All for the greater good 🙌
Matthew 19.11-12.
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Some things ate difficult to hear because it's the truth...& many of us have been duped by the world...we seek true peace & inner freedom...& only the TRUTH SETS US FREE...& oh my thank God for His PATIENCE, MERCY & GRACE...because I'm one that's had 2 healing annulments & finding I'm still a major work in progress. Jesus together here we pray for all of us on this journey of faith ...to know, love & serve our Father thru Holy Mother Church❤️🙏
Amen 🙏🙏🙏🙏 thank you for this information and conversation
I only wish I had know about the blessings the Church teaches decades ago! Thank you so much for addressing these issues for those of us who are older & those with a past outside of Catholicism.
Beautifully expressed, thank you!
Thanks for listening
Padre Cristino Gracias 🙏🏻 ❤
I'm finally ready to hear this. Thank you Father and Ken for the honest truth. My wife left 4.5 years ago, and I received my divorce certificate in October of last year which allows me to apply for an annulment. I sent it in on Tuesday. Please pray for me, my wife, and our 3 kids. May God's will be done.
Thank you for sharing. We will keep your intentions in our prayers this evening when we pray the Rosary.
Wow, Thank you.
The catholic priests say one thing and the church does another. After 30 of marriage my wife filed for civil divorce and it was the most painful time of my life but then she filed for an annulment it was easily given to us. I read her petition application and her only witness testimony and it was very inaccurate. How can the Catholic Church say that when you have a sacramental marriage, god is present to seal your marriage but when you file for an annulment there are three human judges that decide if your marriage is valid or not.
If you read the annulment paper it states that the annulment is not final, your conscience is. If believe it was sacramental then do not remarry. You can also repeal the annulment to a court in Rome. Sometimes when they look at it, they reverse the judgment of the local church court. If your wife has intentionally lied in order to deceive the annulment process then she will have to answer for that in the end. If so and she remarries she is commiting adultery regardless how she may have appeased her conscience. Remember people can rationalize themselves into almost anything.
This was so wonderful and helpful. Thank you very much! I am very grateful!! 🙏🙏
I needed this today. God bless both of you.
Thanks for watching Patrick
@@Catholicspeaker you’re very welcome. I absolutely love your RUclips channel and content.
I would love to see a video on CCC 2364 and Canon 1151. There is a lot of persistent mortal sin happening out there inside of marriages and Catholics who believe more in the sexual revolution than in what the church teaches.
The reason why those cannon laws are ignored is because Love cannot be defined legally. That's the defacto new purpose of marriage after Vatican 2.
Great advice you share about proceeding in new relationships!!!💯
Thank you so much for sharing this important information . I Hope the Lord Will always guide and protect me from anything that is Not right thing for me to do. Amen🙏
Happy Blessed anniversary!💜🙏🏼💜
No. That is the correct answer.👍
Truth hurts😢 but it’s truth and must be accepted.
Father Christino makes some excellent points about AI concerns
Thanks for watching
Congratulations and happy anniversary you two! ❤️. We will celebrate 51 yrs. this Nov. and dated 5 yrs. during school. So true, marry your best friend and remember that no one is perfect. I have no real words of wisdom because each relationship is a journey of discovery, faith, learning, adapting, growing, sharing, loving, and forgiving. God bless you on this journey and as you know, marriage takes three. Best wishes for your continued success In marriage and life. ❤️🙏
Ken and Janell Happy Anniversary to you both and your beautiful Family you both have a wonderful day and so much love ❤️ 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🙏🏻✝️☮️📿
Only Trust in God and Jesus Christ forever
Thank you Father for a very honest opinion on marriage I an separated and I have a full relationship with God. It was very lonely in the beginning but I found God abd he us my spouse my friend and companion. I am in.ministry so I know I can not be in a relationship .My marriage was very toxic and I believed God removed me I want to go to heaven not hell. I believe God comes first. Amen.
Thank you, God bless 🙏❤
We need a very solid moral framework to find peace in our lives. There are difficulties that couples face these days more than before as well. I think the reason why couples head to the courts is because in their minds they know there is an easy way out, this is where they can go when difficulties arise, instead of working things out for themselves. Besides once a couple head to the courts for separation, the process itself causes more burdens on each person in that family unit.
My husband decided not to get counseling, and chose divorce. I was partially relieved at the time because of not being able to speak/communicate as he wouldn't let me. I felt tortured. My dream of marriage, my life... broken. It's a tragedy.
God Bless You:)
Something that needs to be widely known too is the difficulty & divorce rates for 2nd or 3rd marriages is even higher than 1st...so for those in difficult marriages thinking it's the easy way out or it will be better next time...my advice is,...don't fall for the lies...know Thyself...Love God & with Him...all things are possible
& a thought to consider for loneliness...if you fall in love with Jesus...that loneliness goes away as you seek a good relationship with Him, His Church & serving with the gifts God has given
A question that had many answers by many priests thus far: What if one was only civilly married, not in the catholic church, and the partner had already been married twice before, in a church of christ, not catholic. Is an annulment needed?
From a realistic standpoint, there needs to be hard. Consequences to not making good choices. The good that can come from such a thing is that others see your example and do a better job on their own marriages. Taking more care to choose better partners.
My mother was Protestant and my father was Catholic. They were married in the Nazarene Church. My father was divorced before he married my mom. I was born 5 months after my parents married. My father's first marriage was in the Catholic Church. Was his marriage to my mother valid? I have heard it said that if a child is born less than 6 months after the marriage that child is still considered to be born out of wedlock-is this true?
One question for Father. Some people have said that because they received prior instructions from a priest in the past regarding the invalidity of their sacramental marriage, which might have been misunderstood by either parties at that time, (the priest and the person), that they are not in sin or error if they have chosen to remarry and so they can continue to be in communion with the church.
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My mother gave us, 9 children, this advice “if you divorce and marry again, you only trade one set of problems for another “ Unless you and especially your children are being horribly abused, then work on being more aware of doing things to please your mate. Goodness begets goodness. Eight of my brothers and sisters were married until death. One member was divorced early in the marriage but married again until death.
💔✝️🙏🙏✝️😥 protection from non-Catholic influence upon loved one .... dismantling Sacramental Marriage .... untreated previous Relationship Trauma .... avoiding Confession, Holy Mass, spiritual direction, Catholic teaching .... LORD HAVE MERCY
I pray for all those who ask for intercession in the name of Jesus our Redeemer. Hail Mary!
I need guidance Father. We were married by an Eastern Catholic Pastor, does that mean our marriage is not sacramental? Is it considered a valid marriage in the Catholic Church? Please help😢
Why wouldn't it be valid, all priests in communion with the Bishop of Rome, including all the Eastern Catholic Chruches/Rites are able to administer the sacraments.
Hello.
Can a Catholic marry a divorced person who was never married in the Catholic Church for their first marriage? Would that require an annulment as well?
How about a Non Christian separated man, who comes to Catholic faith by providence of God.. Whether he is free to get married in Church after Baptism and other Sacraments? Whether his previous marriage gets automatically nullified if his wife had abandoned him? How the Pauline Privilege works in this case?
I would like to know that if you are divorced and your spouse is still living, can you now start dating and proceed toward marriage in the church. Thank you.
No
Does a divorced man need to have an annullment to be able to date or have a chaste relationship? Is it adultry if he does not have the annullment to havr a chaste relationship
This is very intelligent conversation
and has helped me to understand
where I stand.
Thankyou
My spouse changed immediately after we left the wedding reception. He became abusive, toxic, and a totally unchristian person. I don't believe we were ever sacramentally married, though we were married in the Catholic Church. I stayed in that hell for 33 years CRYING OUT FOR THE SACRAMENTAL GRACES THAT ROLLED OFF HIM LIKE WATER OFF A DUCK'S BACK. I will be lonely for the rest of my life. I would rather handcuff myself to a gorilla than get married again. I don't want another relationship.
This is hard to read and its the case for many. For me it is still hard to believe that is what "God wants".
@@nataliaabelloHumans cannot know what “God wants” if you are not Jesus Christ. Humility and charity are what is needed here.
What happens when your spouse is an alcoholic, gambler, and does not want to go for help? Can you get a divorce?
The appreciation for the objectivity of the inherent goodness of marriage and the indisoluability of marriage is predicated upon the faith that both husband and wife would have in the sacrament as well as objective reality which can often be eclipsed and subsumed by the tyranny of emotions.
It’s so widespread, it’s impossible to correct the errors, so many remarried and have kids and believe that they’re marriage is valid under God , what they must do to save their souls? 😞
If someone
The problem is that many people are not born again some even don't understand marriage. Bible study in small groups in the church will help.
I am not even Catholic but it is biblically correct and it's a shame so few believers recognize that fact - marriage is until death, period. Yes there are instances when separation is better for people in abusive situations and such, but unfortunately, the truth is the truth.
If I person is disabled and has trouble working can he still marry?
From personal experience, my church marriage was a mistake. He waa an alcoholic. He never went to Church, after 2 Retrovaille failures, HE filed for divorce, so he could marry someone else. I went thru the Church marriage so would not be living in sin.
No kids involved. This was not our 1st marriage. Bit it was our 1st in The Catholic Church.
Now I am waiting for my annulment gets approved. I miss receiving Nd my health worsen. Its been 16 months without Receiving The Eucharistic....
Watch Father Chris Alar , Divine Mercy on divorce, annulment. If I understood it correctly, you should get the Eucharist. 🙏
Does a divorced man need to have an annullment to be able to date or have a chaste relationship? Is it adultry if he does not have the annullment to havr a chaste relationship
The problem is when a wife cheats, it's just over, whether the Sacrament has taken place or not. A cheating woman robs a man of his most fundamental masculinity when she does it, and that's just not the case when the husband cheats. Islam and Judaism (old covenant Judaism) both have laws that reflect this distinction, where is the Christian acknowledgement that a wife cheating is worse because it throws a man's entire position in his family (his paternity) into question
so many Catholics don't know anything on this topic, local churches need to do a better job teaching on this doctrine
The Lord “wants us to be happy?” Maybe in heaven, but earth and faith are an experience of sorrow, as well as joys.
Happiness or holiness? Up to you. Marriage is for LIFE. it is a covenent.
Please pray for me 🙏 I'm in a relationship where I am waiting for his Declaration of Annulment. He didn't know an Annulment was possible or what the grounds for a non existent or forced marriage were.
Will pray for you. Don't be alone together and set some boundaries until and if the declaration of nulity is given.
If adulterers cannot receive communion, then the answer is not "case by case."
If procreation is the primary purpose of marriage, then the only necessary ingredient missing would be inability to go through the motions of procreating.
Someone who cheats has their own issues. Someone who divorces because they were cheated on has their own issues. Jesus says if you remarry you are cheating. So if you divorce a spouse for cheating and then remarry you just did the same thing. It's really that simple. I know getting cheated on hurts, but it doesn't give you the right to do it back.
Amen
The pride😢
That's why marriage is one of the sacraments. It's a COVENANT you made with GOD. It can either sanctify you both through your trials and be together in heaven or make each of you go hell bound just because you didn't persevere.
Excatly
I'm disappointed you did not discuss Mathew 5:32, about the wife quilty of fornication. Seems to me that's a door for divorce/annulment.
That is not how Catholics interpret that verse. Infidelity is not a valid reason for an annulment. Like he says in this video, Catholics interpret that as, “unless the marriage is unlawful”.
We can see this is correct because in the other Gospel where Jesus says this the disciples freak out and say things like, “that’s rough. If that’s the case no one should get married at all”. In their society, divorce because of adultery was accepted and considered justified. The reason they freak out is because they understand Jesus is saying that adultery is not a valid justification for divorce and they think that is too harsh.
just 2 stats to think about -- marriage rates in the US are now the lowest we have ever recorded, 40% of all children born today are born out of wedlock, we wonder why our society has so many problems, marriage is very critical in forming a stable and healthy society, since the 70s marriage has been under siege and losing ground
Right out of the gate the gas lighting goes up to 20
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I think you guys got it right initially in the video by saying marriage is for life and there is no divorce, but then the whole idea of annulment is ridiculous!!! So your telling me 2 people go throught weeks if not months of classes to make sure of what marriage is, then make vows in front of hundreds of people and to God, all recorded legally w certificates....and then you when someone wants out lets pretend it never happened....come on.
People can make vows they have no intention of keeping. If your wife says, “you knew what you were getting into, I was never going to be a good Catholic wife!”, then that’s fraud, perpetrated on your wedding day which is exactly the kind of situation annulments are for.
You
Thank you for the video! I especially like what you said at the end Father about staying close to Jesus. To really know the truth we need to stay close to the truth. And when we are close to Jesus we won't be feeling lonely.
As an extra step, for those asking for a declaration of nullity, it should be a requirement they not be in a relationship prior to applying for one. As Father says, you can't properly discern when you're romantically involved with someone already.
Let's recognise the real author of divorce, Satan. He attacks the domestic church because it's a reflection of the Holy Trinity.
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I have seen all of these scenarios, but think it should of also been mentioned that they need to be open for children. My ex said he only wanted 2 children the night of the honeymoon and it was a highly abusive relationship and I got an annulment
I like Pope Francis statement on the fact that many matrimonies are null because the couple did not fully understood it was a spiritual commitment for life. Sometimes they are more social contract. Its a vice in consent, but I wonder if Canon Law actually accepts them as such just arguing there was still not full understanding of the commitment. Can anyone more knowledgeable on the topic provide a good answer? This is the video the Pope speaks about it: ruclips.net/video/0IcbhHS-onA/видео.html
It think the matter is very complicated. Yes Jesus said no one should separate what God has bound. If Jesus was physically present today, I doubt he would force someone to stay bound with someone who is violent or abuse of any kind. I takes 2 to build a healthy relationship.💖💖
Christ set the example for us of how to treat our spouse as He called His Church the bride. He suffered at the hands of His Bride/spouse even to death by her hand for her salvation. He wont force anyone but He would ask "Did you vow before God then obedience is required?" and then would ask them "to pick up their cross and follow Him?" We can know this would be His response base on what happened after He ate with the sinners and tax collectors they became His disciples and suffered well for the salvation for others.
@@nathanjones3621 Just out of curiosity, how can one know whether they were not married to "satan" in the first place.... it can hide behind a beautiful groom or bride and then show the true colors right after. Some marriage relationships seems to be a living hell. Prayers are needed human beings to come back in the Love of God, the basics of who we are! 🙏🙏🙏
@@MsBernie64 because God made man and woman good as it says in Genesis. It sounds like your implying God makes some people evil and hell bound from birth. I hope I am misunderstanding this "Satan" remark. Yes, because of the fall of Adam we suffer from concupiscence but God has made us all for Heaven and all have the potential of saying yes to Him and His will. It is real love that holds on to the hope for the salvation of the other and to give up because one suffers hurt or "trauma" is a hardening of the heart and does not follow the example of Christ and His love for His bride.
I do not advocate for staying under the same roof if abuse is happening but to instead continue to work with aiding ones spouse in any way possible to reconcile the negetive acts so as to allow Christ to shine through oneself and the spouse.
I would encourage people to look to the Saints examples as well. One that comes to mind is Blessed Anna-Maria Taigi.
The truth is now in the Catholic Church anyone can get an annulment! It’s easier than a kindergarten math test!
My ex husband and I were together for 23 years. Married 16 of those years. We got together when I was 16, he was 17. We have 2 children together. We got married by the DJ first, then in the Catholic church because I wanted to be right by God and the church. I also was praying praying praying my ex would get it together with hanging out with his friends and constant cheating. He did not. After all those years and nothing changing, a lot of tears...more than anyone can count, sooo much I can't even say here, I finally said no more. I am with someone else and plan to marry and am getting ready to start the anullment process. I am leaving it in God's hands because the same way God doesn't like divorce he also gave grounds for divorce. How many times can one be continually cheated on and not actually have a relationship with that person and stay married!!?? I stuck around for the kids in hopes he would change. I divorced him over 10 years ago. I was in major hope things would change when we married and they never did.
no one changes unless they want to, sounds like your ex-husband was immature and not ready for marriage
@@michaelsix9684totally!
Looks like cover pictures are generated by AI?