I will never understand how parents can reject their children for sexuality that they have absolutely no choice in. To me it’s unbelievable - what’s the problem? I’m so pleased that you got through this and your parents finally came around and accepted the inevitable. Good for them and wonderful for you.
Dylan as a teacher and counselor with decades of education in psychology and theology and several more decades of practice in those fields, I totally agree with your thoughts here and want to thank you for sharing them. In my opinion, you have reached a very high level of love and understanding. Thank you...........Ray
Same here! I came out in Oct. 2010 at age 20. My parents disowned me in December, and I moved out in January. Haven't seen or spoken to them since. No regrets. :)
From someone who came out to family at 14, spent a year in conversion therapy, another year in foster care and a year in group homes, family is who accepts you for who you are unconditionally. Otherwise, they are just blood relatives.
Dylan you grew and changed from your experience. The biggest part was the acceptance and letting go of the anger. You keep working on things. You have understanding and boundaries. This is key. The fact you had to move back and move forward says a lot. Forgiveness is key. It is great you shared your experience. Keep working on things Dylan.
I came out to my mom on my 50th birthday. I expected tears and all, but she was just quiet for a minute and said "You aren't going to start dressing like Elton John are you" and I said no and she said ok lol
Dylan, you are very insightful young man, you have a way with words to explain those emotional situations we have experienced as gay men. Thank you for sharing.
I believe that I have a similar issue. I still don't know if I've ever forgiven my mom for not going to my wedding when I got married to my husband. I know she never grew up disliking people like me because my aunt even told me that they had friends like that and her mom which would be of course my grandmother would not approve of the way my mother has been treating me in regards to me being gay. I'm sure I still have some anger there for her not coming to my wedding in fact when I asked her if she would come her words were. I think I'll stay home. But surprisingly the person that I thought that would not show up did show up which was my brother. It all still feels like confusion and chaos. In my mind of course.
I grew up with my cousin who was gay and fem, I showed signs of gayness as well and my family used to make fun of me. I ended up hetero and have a family of my own. It hurt a lot during my childhood having that hate and negativity put on me, I knew I wasn't gay but never voiced it or stood up to my family for fear of retribution.
@@Bazroshan thank you for your comment - we celebrated my cousin's 5th year anniversary of his passing yesterday. He took his life. I suspect it was the years of redicule he received for being gay. Be it known he came out in the late 70s when it was illegal in New Zealand and he'd often come home after a night out battered and bruised after being beaten by police or homophobes at bars. Rip George
Your smile makes me so happy! I moved away at age 40. I had 2 visits from one Sister for my 2 Sons’ graduations and my Mom came to 1 over a 15 year period. Other than a Niece that came 3 times, that’s the only family who have visited out of 5 siblings, my Mom, 17 Nieces and Nephews. We only live 4 hours apart. I’ve now limited my visits to once every two years. My two Sons have no desire to visit any of them!
Dylan, I hear you. Most Important clause to me in what you said is the NECESSITY of ‘meeting in the middle’. Without that, it is a waste of breath and feeling. Glad to know things are good for you now. Herman, one of your many brothers
Substances suck and I am so happy for you! I like to wake up and have coffee, and go to the gym. So being in a good mindset makes all the difference. Confidence! Plus who cares what people think!
Words of wisdom Dylan. I think our parents did the best they could with their mindset and their background. Gays should tell parents that gay is genetic, hereditary. It came down from genes through them. There were gays in the family in the past. They may not believe you but it will give them something to think about.
No matter if it is 2024 or 1924, place in time is relative. That said, I do think it is easier in 2024 to come out. But doing so takes planning and time.
Dealing with families is never easy, even for straight people. My family had a old notion we used to tell all the newly weds. If you want your marriage to last? move away far enough that a day trip isn't easy. That one piece of advice rang 100% true. Nobody that stayed around the family had their marriage survive. Everyone that moved away thrived like crazy. My little brother went thru 2 marriages before he learned his lesson.
I send all my love and support to all the LGBT people of the world ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You all are important and very valuable even though we live in a world that makes you all believe otherwise. Remember always be proud of who you are 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈 You all make from this world a better place ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 LGBT people are a rainbow of love in a world full of hate, but with difference of our straight partners, we all are united over a same flag 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈 The flag of LGBT love ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 And we all must be united against hate, violence, discrimination and intolerance ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 We all are like a great family and we must fight to destroy hate ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 Remember, LGBT people is love and love always wins ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 I don't care about your race, nationality, biological gender, health condition, religion or any other condition ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 If you are an LGBT person you have all my love and my support ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You guys are not alone in this fight and all the LGBT people of all over the world needs to understand this messagge, cause just united we will win against hate and we don't have to allow that nothing divide us. Never feel bad of who you are and never allow that this cruel world change who you really are or turn off your light and your shine ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You all born that way and remember LGBT people of all the world, at the end, love always wins ❤🧡💛💚💙
It just never has made sense to me to want anything to do with bigots, no matter who they are. Not "knowing better" doesn't work for me as a reason. I wish it could be the way you describe sometimes but living with someone around you who thinks you're evil is beyond the limit for me.
My father and step mother cut me out of the family for 12 years for being gay....when they finally asked me to return I said it's too late, and never spoke to them again.
Standing up is critical for those who are coming up behind you. Religion teaches to believe in myth as though it is fact. They are a major factor why bullying exists and why parents cast out their own children. Bigotry breeds quickly with silence. Silence causes young persons to commit suicide.
Dude I hope you never sell yourself short to anyone family or friends you deserve better. I did hear You Say You forgave your parents but I never heard you say your parents asked for your forgiveness. There is nothing out of the ordinary for any of us to expect other than equality in life. Again never sell yourself short buddy.
Sorry you had to go through that misery Dylan. When I came out, my family and friends were very accepting and loving, but I was raised in very liberal Los Angeles.
Dude we are not 50% responsible for anything negative about being gay that's Insane. You can't make excuses for people in their 50s or 60s or at any age you would think they would have More real life experiences VS be judgmental And homophobic. I feel you're making excuses for them and selling yourself short
No offense, but your parents drove you into self destruction. Glad they finally realized their humanity. But I still find what they did disgusting. And for the record, homosexuality was NEVER wrong. Religion lied to your parents and they should stop giving their religion money. Glad you are the bigger “parent” to your parents.
I will never understand how parents can reject their children for sexuality that they have absolutely no choice in. To me it’s unbelievable - what’s the problem? I’m so pleased that you got through this and your parents finally came around and accepted the inevitable. Good for them and wonderful for you.
Dylan as a teacher and counselor with decades of education in psychology and theology and several more decades of practice in those fields, I totally agree with your thoughts here and want to thank you for sharing them. In my opinion, you have reached a very high level of love and understanding. Thank you...........Ray
It doesnt matter if others accept you for being gay, what matters is that YOU love and accept yourself for who you are. ❤❤
The collective gay community could *definitely* learn something from your grace and patience❣️ 👏👏👏👏👏
My family is very small but I haven't seen or spoken to them since 1999.......
I don't miss them at all. 😊😊
Same here! I came out in Oct. 2010 at age 20. My parents disowned me in December, and I moved out in January. Haven't seen or spoken to them since. No regrets. :)
Love listening to you, you're so sincere and kind with a warm voice and good advice, Thanks
Mature, intelligent and very articulate. Thank you.
I LOVE YOUR ACCENT
Parents should unconditionally love their children no matter what. Period end of story!
From someone who came out to family at 14, spent a year in conversion therapy, another year in foster care and a year in group homes, family is who accepts you for who you are unconditionally. Otherwise, they are just blood relatives.
This came across my feed, but I can tell you are from South Carolina. Its the inflection in your voice.
Dylan you grew and changed from your experience. The biggest part was the acceptance and letting go of the anger. You keep working on things. You have understanding and boundaries. This is key. The fact you had to move back and move forward says a lot. Forgiveness is key. It is great you shared your experience. Keep working on things Dylan.
I came out to my mom on my 50th birthday. I expected tears and all, but she was just quiet for a minute and said "You aren't going to start dressing like Elton John are you" and I said no and she said ok lol
Dylan, you are very insightful young man, you have a way with words to explain those emotional situations we have experienced as gay men. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for telling your story and mindset Dylan
Bigotry and hate still happens and your channel is important to shed light on that
And, Dylan, have a great and happy 30th birthday❤
I can relate somewhat, and my heart goes out to you. You’re amazing, and I’m glad you are vocal and thriving. ❤
I JUST LOVE YOUR ACCENT DYLAN!! I LOVE THE SOUTHERN PEOPLE THEY ARE FRIENDLY!!
I believe that I have a similar issue. I still don't know if I've ever forgiven my mom for not going to my wedding when I got married to my husband. I know she never grew up disliking people like me because my aunt even told me that they had friends like that and her mom which would be of course my grandmother would not approve of the way my mother has been treating me in regards to me being gay. I'm sure I still have some anger there for her not coming to my wedding in fact when I asked her if she would come her words were. I think I'll stay home. But surprisingly the person that I thought that would not show up did show up which was my brother. It all still feels like confusion and chaos. In my mind of course.
I grew up with my cousin who was gay and fem, I showed signs of gayness as well and my family used to make fun of me. I ended up hetero and have a family of my own. It hurt a lot during my childhood having that hate and negativity put on me, I knew I wasn't gay but never voiced it or stood up to my family for fear of retribution.
Ouch! Why can't people just accept that humans come in a wide range of types?
@@Bazroshan thank you for your comment - we celebrated my cousin's 5th year anniversary of his passing yesterday. He took his life. I suspect it was the years of redicule he received for being gay. Be it known he came out in the late 70s when it was illegal in New Zealand and he'd often come home after a night out battered and bruised after being beaten by police or homophobes at bars. Rip George
Oh yeah, "don't act on it" (and have a love starved life.) That attitude is so cruel, delivered so callously.
Your smile makes me so happy! I
moved away at age 40. I had 2 visits from one Sister for my 2 Sons’ graduations and my Mom came to 1 over a 15 year period. Other than a Niece that came 3 times, that’s the only family who have visited out of 5 siblings, my Mom, 17 Nieces and Nephews. We only live 4 hours apart. I’ve now limited my visits to once every two years. My two Sons have no desire to visit any of them!
Dylan, I hear you. Most Important clause to me in what you said is the NECESSITY of ‘meeting in the middle’. Without that, it is a waste of breath and feeling. Glad to know things are good for you now. Herman, one of your many brothers
Substances suck and I am so happy for you! I like to wake up and have coffee, and go to the gym. So being in a good mindset makes all the difference. Confidence! Plus who cares what people think!
I don’t really talk about it with mine . My relatives know but any talk about it is off limits
Words of wisdom Dylan. I think our parents did the best they could with their mindset and their background. Gays should tell parents that gay is genetic, hereditary. It came down from genes through them. There were gays in the family in the past. They may not believe you but it will give them something to think about.
Words from the south !
Dylan age 30, Parents 50
What a cute family. 😂
Well presented subject matter.
You have helped with healing many wounded individual's.
Thank you.
Thanks. You are GREAT person!
No matter if it is 2024 or 1924, place in time is relative. That said, I do think it is easier in 2024 to come out. But doing so takes planning and time.
Thank you for your vids. Knowing there is someone else out there with similar experiences definitely helps.
Great video. Good sensible advice. Be patient.
Dylan I have that issue with my family members, but I’m gonna keep on going not gonna worry about him❤️👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👍🏾
I’m so sorry. Thanks for sharing.
Now a days, more resources for young gay people who have been kicked out or disowned by their families.
Very great video Dylan Im GAY as well I come from the Conservative Mennonite(very strict) and my family does not accept me
Great video. Thanks for sharing 👍
The breaking of a hope-filled heart doesn't have to be the end of the story.
Dealing with families is never easy, even for straight people. My family had a old notion we used to tell all the newly weds. If you want your marriage to last? move away far enough that a day trip isn't easy. That one piece of advice rang 100% true. Nobody that stayed around the family had their marriage survive. Everyone that moved away thrived like crazy. My little brother went thru 2 marriages before he learned his lesson.
Compassion!! And patience as you become a hostoric inevitability.❤❤
I send all my love and support to all the LGBT people of the world ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You all are important and very valuable even though we live in a world that makes you all believe otherwise. Remember always be proud of who you are 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈 You all make from this world a better place ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 LGBT people are a rainbow of love in a world full of hate, but with difference of our straight partners, we all are united over a same flag 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈 The flag of LGBT love ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 And we all must be united against hate, violence, discrimination and intolerance ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 We all are like a great family and we must fight to destroy hate ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 Remember, LGBT people is love and love always wins ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 I don't care about your race, nationality, biological gender, health condition, religion or any other condition ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 If you are an LGBT person you have all my love and my support ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You guys are not alone in this fight and all the LGBT people of all over the world needs to understand this messagge, cause just united we will win against hate and we don't have to allow that nothing divide us. Never feel bad of who you are and never allow that this cruel world change who you really are or turn off your light and your shine ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 You all born that way and remember LGBT people of all the world, at the end, love always wins ❤🧡💛💚💙
It just never has made sense to me to want anything to do with bigots, no matter who they are. Not "knowing better" doesn't work for me as a reason. I wish it could be the way you describe sometimes but living with someone around you who thinks you're evil is beyond the limit for me.
My father and step mother cut me out of the family for 12 years for being gay....when they finally asked me to return I said it's too late, and never spoke to them again.
I'm glad it all worked out for you.
Standing up is critical for those who are coming up behind you.
Religion teaches to believe in myth as though it is fact. They are a major factor why bullying exists and why parents cast out their own children.
Bigotry breeds quickly with silence.
Silence causes young persons to commit suicide.
Dude I hope you never sell yourself short to anyone family or friends you deserve better. I did hear You Say You forgave your parents but I never heard you say your parents asked for your forgiveness. There is nothing out of the ordinary for any of us to expect other than equality in life. Again never sell yourself short buddy.
Sounds like time to not accept theirs. I mean it’s weird what they do behind closed doors.
I’m looking at him and I can’t stop wondering what his DNA ancestry results would say. Very handsome
Yeah, after you come out, some time apart can give the parties some breathing space
Its all about Respect u already now how they feeling i would not take anyone around them because of Love and God loves u 2
Sorry you had to go through that misery Dylan. When I came out, my family and friends were very accepting and loving, but I was raised in very liberal Los Angeles.
Take time with Christian parents they will never stop loving u just the gay life style not good in God eyes so glad they came around ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Do you have to be gay to Subscribe? 😎
My parents never had a problem with me coming out at 18, my dad had the most problem was when I converted to Roman Catholicism 😊
I have a problem with it, too. I think you're kidding. Anyway, I hope you are.
❤
Peace
I ❤ U as always.
🥰👍❤️❤️❤️
Dude we are not 50% responsible for anything negative about being gay that's Insane. You can't make excuses for people in their 50s or 60s or at any age you would think they would have More real life experiences VS be judgmental And homophobic. I feel you're making excuses for them and selling yourself short
No offense, but your parents drove you into self destruction. Glad they finally realized their humanity. But I still find what they did disgusting. And for the record, homosexuality was NEVER wrong. Religion lied to your parents and they should stop giving their religion money. Glad you are the bigger “parent” to your parents.
Typo historic inevitability. Diva keypad