Ex-FLDS Reacts to Gloriavale Christian Community in New Zealand

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  • Опубликовано: 11 сен 2024

Комментарии • 263

  • @China-Clay
    @China-Clay Год назад +299

    Interestingly, the couple that gets married in this documentary, ended up with five kids, husband got sick and they wouldn’t help him with his seizures, she got all of them out and they have participated in court proceedings against the community, the wife seemed so so shy and she has turned out to be a very strong woman, wife, and mother, as well as advocate! ♥️♥️

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад +14

      Paul and Pearl fyi

    • @divatesteddivaapproved
      @divatesteddivaapproved Год назад +21

      Pearl is so strong. I heard her testify about not being able to go to the dentist and just needed to deal with horrible dental pain and tooth loss. I'm glad they got out.

    • @FlowerChild65
      @FlowerChild65 Год назад +3

      Where can i find out more about them?

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад

      @@FlowerChild65 search Gloriavale in RUclips

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад +3

      @@divatesteddivaapproved she turned out to be a tough cookie!!

  • @annetteco9717
    @annetteco9717 Год назад +38

    Gloriavile was founded in 1969, in Canterbury, by Neville Cooper, who changed his name to Hopeful Christian. He was charged & found guilty of 10 counts of indecent assault between 1980-1984. There are still allegations today of child abuse, & the local authorities are investigating. Gloriavile is currently in the NZ Employment Court about work conditions & what is deemed volunteering & actual work. What they show in the 3 part doco is what Gloiravile wants you to see. If you can watch the actual movie that was recently released, that is from those who have left Gloriavile, & their experience & truth. What they went through in Gloriavile, what they left behind if they left or were kicked out. It's eye opening. It's why gloriavile is considered a cult in nz.

  • @debraduxfield-db2dm
    @debraduxfield-db2dm Год назад +80

    I am in NZ. Gloriavale pretty much handpicked the people they allowed to be featured in these earlier documentaries - to always show them in a good light. The new documentary that has been in cinemas recently is different - it is from the perspective of people who have left the community - so the real stories are coming out now. There is an organisation that helps leavers - because they leave with nothing and very large families and no knowledge of the modern world. They also will be disowned by family still in the community - it is very sad. There is a lot out now on RUclips about these stories.

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад +11

      I’m hoping we can see the new documentary here in the states soon! It was very obvious that the people were hand picked, even more impressive that Paul and pearl left!!!

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад +11

      The show we were watching was definitely painting everything in a positive light. We are excited to continue to watch more stories and documentaries about this group, especially from those that have left.

    • @haniinii
      @haniinii Год назад +1

      What’s the new documentary called? I need to keep an eye out for it

    • @rastagirlnz
      @rastagirlnz Год назад

      Especially here in New Zealand...

    • @frejalister7253
      @frejalister7253 Год назад

      @@haniinii “Gloriavale” it’s a great watch. I watched it when it first came out but it is a super heavy watch ❤

  • @cindyadams1779
    @cindyadams1779 Год назад +12

    I first heard you both on Mormon stories. Loved the episode!
    So glad I found you again.
    The way you talk about your past and the love and respect you have for one another is so obvious.
    I’m so glad you both made it out of whatever trauma you had and sound so healthy and loving!

  • @pszczolka80
    @pszczolka80 Год назад +13

    My husband and I had it the other way around than a lot of couples, where he was the one who was more invested in the aesthetics of our wedding (especially colours), as he's a graphic designer and very artistic and has a strong sense of style. I'm not artistic at all but I am a financial person, so I was in charge of the budget. We made all the really big decisions together, like the overall "feel" and theme we were going for, the venue, music, food and drink, etc - and I was responsible for my own wedding outfit of course - but all the detailed decisions were his.
    Another factor that played into it was that it was my second marriage and his first, so I'd already had a big, romantic "princess day". Being hubby's first (and hopefully only) time, and him having some definitive ideas about what he wanted because he had waited a long time to get married, I basically wanted him to have his special day and I basically just reserved the right of veto and added my two cents in when it was asked for.

  • @hopetikvah4906
    @hopetikvah4906 Год назад +29

    I grew up pretty closely tied to this community (girls from there would study at my school and stay with members of the cult I grew up in). There is a LOT of much darker information that is not widely publicised or not public at all. I'm so glad people are finally becoming aware of it. My biggest wish is that it, and my own cult dissolve in my lifetime. Really weird seeing something so close to home on your channel!

    • @swedishlina
      @swedishlina Год назад +1

      If you don’t mind me asking but what is your group called? I’m extremely interested in learning about different cults, I don’t know of many of them down here as I only live across the ditch. I am so happy you managed to get out yourself. Take care of yourself 🇦🇺♥️

    • @hopetikvah4906
      @hopetikvah4906 Год назад +1

      @@swedishlina My group didn't really have a formal name, but it fell under the Hebrew Roots/Messianic Jewish umbrella.

    • @swedishlina
      @swedishlina Год назад +3

      @@hopetikvah4906 so a Jewish-Christian cult that believed that Jesus was the messiah of the Torah/Old Testament. It does make for an interesting mix of a religion. Unfortunately that is only from the outside, however from what limited “
      understanding” of the subject I have it not so on the inside.
      Especially if you are a woman, but then I don’t really know of any religion that puts us women above the men.
      I am sure you sacrificed a lot to be able to escape, I really hope the best for you.

    • @hopetikvah4906
      @hopetikvah4906 Год назад +6

      @@swedishlina Yup, that's pretty much exactly it. They presented almost like an SDA group to outsiders, and many members were respectable members of the community, but behind the scenes was child beating, hoarding guns and ammo to defend themselves against the government, acting out Armageddon in the bush, polygamy, and underage forced marriages (youngest I knew was a 15 year old girl made to marry the son of one of her father's other wives) etc. There are things and people that I miss, but it's been almost two years since I left, and I'm never going back.

    • @swedishlina
      @swedishlina Год назад +3

      @@hopetikvah4906 thank you so much for explaining this to me. I truly appreciate your openness in regards to your previous “family”. I am truly sorry for what you left behind and the people you had to sever yourself from. However if sounds like you are now living a true life and I hope your path out of this religion will be a smooth one. My heart goes out to you ❤️

  • @luciafrau125
    @luciafrau125 Год назад +14

    My husband and I chose everything about the wedding together (besides my dress). The only thing he didn't choose and neither did I was the plates and table cloths, because we let that to my mom.
    My mom's favorite hobby is to put together beautiful tables and it was like a little present to her from us

  • @redlipstickclub
    @redlipstickclub Год назад +11

    Eventhough the community is clearly set up for no privacy, I did love the fact that these group meals took away some of the workload of cooking meals for your whole family as a wife every day. Also, the laundry service I thought was also a great idea for a wife with a ton of kids...kind of gave me the feel of having help with a sister wife without having to share your actual husband. Also growing old in that community, you never have to worry about having a roof over your head or food in your stomach and there are always people around so as an elderly person you dont have to worry about growing old and dying alone. There were also lots of fun activities and laughter and at least some connection and access to the outside world and inviting the outside world to their community. Lots of things are wrong with this situation but even wrong things have a few takeaways that are positive.

  • @corid1897
    @corid1897 Год назад +5

    Your audio is so much better now. Thanks!

  • @FlowerChild65
    @FlowerChild65 Год назад +7

    Watched this a few years ago. It's really interesting. As others have said, I highly recommend Daughter of Gloriavale and any talks Lilia has given.

  • @Awifeofanerd
    @Awifeofanerd Год назад +6

    I watched your video then watched all three episodes but now I’m watching interviews of people who left. It’s interesting to see what the documentary focused on and hearing the stories of those who left.

    • @YtGad7000
      @YtGad7000 Год назад

      What are the names or titles of the programs you watched on u tube? I am an Australian woman who had no idea these cults made it so close to home! The whole belief system is polar opposite in every way to the New Testament bible and what Jesus taught! I know, l am a bible believing Christian. 🦘🙂😯😧🥴🥰

    • @Awifeofanerd
      @Awifeofanerd Год назад

      @@YtGad7000 I just put in the search bar people who left Gloriavale. A few videos popped up. It appears to me Lilia Tarawa is the most known. She has done a TedTalk and I believe she wrote a book. I haven’t watched everything that has come up at this time.

  • @freudianslip2010
    @freudianslip2010 Год назад +5

    My husband helped pick the colors for our wedding. We looked at swatches together and chose something we both liked. If I had real wanted a certain color, my husband would probably have gone with it, but I would not have chosen something I knew he hated.
    He did not take part in choosing my dress, except to say he wanted me to be able to move and didn’t think I would look good in something super poofy.

  • @jillsifer
    @jillsifer Год назад +7

    CAN'T STOP LAUGHING. When I was married a thousand years ago, I had a candlelight wedding in a small university chapel, officiated by an Episcopal priest from my home church. I had the MOST FUN planning my pink-and-green wedding. My dress was white taffeta, my shoes were forest-green satin, and my flowers were deep pink. Maid of honor was in forest-green taffeta; bridesmaids were in deep pink taffeta; flower girls were in white taffeta. They all carried white flowers. I ran a few ideas past my then-fiance, who looked up from his law textbooks and murmured "Sounds great, sweetie" a few dozen times. Bless him, he wouldn't have cared (or probably even noticed) if I'd showed up in purple and orange stripes and a burlap veil.
    NO, it is not usual for the groom to be deeply involved in color selections for weddings, at least not in most mainstream American churches. Some engaged men humor their brides more than others, but the truth is most don't care and just want all the bridal hoopla to be over and done with.

    • @manaspajamas5071
      @manaspajamas5071 Год назад +2

      Your wedding sounded so full of life, I love it!
      Just wanted to point out that in OUR culture, it may not be usual for the groom to be so involved, but in other cultures, it might be different. I have a friend who is now married to a beautiful Chinese woman, but he is from the United States and she is, obviously, from China. So not only did they have to plan TWO separate weddings (one here, the other in China), but they had to have an engagement ceremony in China, with pictures, invitations, the whole thing. He HAD to be more involved for the Chinese celebrations because that's what's expected in that culture, and there's nothing wrong with that. To us, some things might seem strange, maybe even a little backward, but it's all about understanding the why behind these traditions, which have been around for millennia. They don't see it as outlandish or absurd as we might because it's what they've been taught to view as normal, again for generations upon generations.
      Besides, why should it matter whether or not a guy has any say in the wedding? He's getting married, too, and if the couple has a strong relationship, it won't be an issue deciding on various things for the wedding. And yes, I am speaking as a now married woman myself; the only thing my husband wanted was for me to feel safe and well, as I deal with chronic illness and past trauma. Although, we did both have the same ideas for my wedding dress, which was rather shocking, in a good way, LOL!

    • @jillsifer
      @jillsifer Год назад

      @@manaspajamas5071 And that's part of the beauty of communities like this. We can all share and learn together.

    • @manaspajamas5071
      @manaspajamas5071 Год назад

      @@jillsifer Absolutely! 😊

  • @ReneeDN
    @ReneeDN Год назад +3

    Hey I hello. I'm from New Zealand 🇳🇿. Can't wait to watch this and see your view on this group.

  • @adreanna8967
    @adreanna8967 Год назад +5

    Gloriavale Leavers Trust is a great resource for articles, books, films, and much more about the community/cult. Especially right now during the current womens court case.

  • @shelliewilliams9840
    @shelliewilliams9840 Год назад +5

    The community was founded in 1969 by Neville Cooper. Thanks guys for always having such interesting topics I absolutely love your channel ❤️

  • @elisemarie4894
    @elisemarie4894 Год назад +3

    Sound is perfect!!! Thank youuuu!!! 💕

  • @deniseflygirl
    @deniseflygirl Год назад +3

    It seems the man’s say in the wedding colors is an amalgamation of how much the woman will let him and how much the man cares about it.

  • @loispatrick2594
    @loispatrick2594 Год назад +10

    I have 8 autoimmune diseases that have resulted in physical disability. My original diagnosis took 8 years. It would be very interesting to know how this community would deal with a person who showed no outward sign of illness (except pain and fatigue originally) for a protracted period of time. As they are expected to contribute workwise to the community, would their symptoms be discounted as malingering? Would they have access to good health care?
    Edit....I just read the comment below where they were deprived of basic health care needs, so I imagine my life in that community would be full of suffering!

    • @adreanna8967
      @adreanna8967 Год назад +1

      I've seen individuals talk about how horrible any health problems or disabilities are treated. You are right. Life there would be horrible for anyone with any disability or form of illness. Many are made to work through pain and illness and are shamed and have to apologize in front of the community for any impact it has on their work.

    • @gamesmom4
      @gamesmom4 Год назад +4

      As someone above pointed out the young couple who got married on this episode left because the husband and began having seizures and he was accused of faking and it was months effort they allowed him to seek help. The wife is now suing the community.

  • @emrysaki
    @emrysaki Год назад +4

    My husband and I just had a courthouse wedding and plan to have an actual ceremony after he graduates from university, but we’re in a bit of a dilemma about colors. My favorite color is red and his is green, but we don’t want our wedding to look like Christmas 😂

    • @myjunkdrawer8014
      @myjunkdrawer8014 Год назад +2

      If you do sage green and a light almost pinky red it won't.

  • @brooke_reiverrose2949
    @brooke_reiverrose2949 Год назад +5

    Just finished all three episodes and they never cease from the wholesome, glowing picture they portray, but there are a ton of red flags. What happens if there’s abuse? There’s nothing to hold the powerful accountable. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Human beings are bound to have conflict. It’s actually healthy. But there’s no discussion of how they handle that. What happens if someone is gay or trans? Or neurodivergent? What if someone has mental health problems?
    (Spoilers⬇️)
    Why don’t they talk about the foundation of this group? Why does there seem to be no questioning in the group? A healthy group will have people that question. Why do the teens, who should be individuating, never complain? Why was that little girl terrified about hell? Why is leaving the group *”more final than death?”*
    There seems to he a lot they didn’t want to show, which makes me wonder what they don’t want to be seen.

    • @katrinastadler7187
      @katrinastadler7187 Год назад +3

      Indeed , there has been alot come about about abuses and there is currently a court case ostensibly about labour rights (ie pay , conditions , hours of work , 'slavery' / servitude etc) but stories of shunning , sexual and physical abuses have come to light . I've posted links here in a couple of places that tell the real stories

  • @dukecesareborgiaofvalencia
    @dukecesareborgiaofvalencia Год назад +1

    You guys are great, love what you do. I would love to hear more about your stories. It's very interesting.

  • @siriusthecat
    @siriusthecat Год назад

    I can't wait for the next two videos on this! I started watching and it is so fascinating

  • @sleepycalico
    @sleepycalico Год назад +1

    I don't get that channel, so I very much enjoyed your recap and look forward to hearing about the next episodes.

  • @cpillow4814
    @cpillow4814 Год назад +6

    You guys should visit the Creation Museum and the Ark Encounter in Kentucky. It shows the science behind the dinosaurs, the flood, etc. It’s fascinating. I was always very confused about the dinosaurs (pretty much everything you said), too. It’s so interesting to see history and science come to life.

    • @angelamaryquitecontrary4609
      @angelamaryquitecontrary4609 Год назад +5

      Please tell me this is a joke.

    • @danysanerd2383
      @danysanerd2383 Год назад +2

      ​@@angelamaryquitecontrary4609 Some people really have to make stuff fit. Like fit into their worldview. 🤦🤦‍♀️🤦‍♂️ What can ya do? 🤷🤷‍♀️🤷‍♂️

    • @angelamaryquitecontrary4609
      @angelamaryquitecontrary4609 Год назад

      @@danysanerd2383 Destroy them in a flood?

    • @colaw77
      @colaw77 Год назад

      Agreed @C Pillow - just because there are some extremist religions that believe something, doesn’t mean it isn’t true or partially true. Just like just because many people don’t believe something, doesn’t make it not true.

  • @China-Clay
    @China-Clay Год назад +1

    Gloriavale Leavers Support Trust is the group that is working to bring help to this group

  • @meganjones1184
    @meganjones1184 Год назад +3

    I'm from NZ. We don't have any polygamists, but we do have these guys. New Zealand, in general, is secular, modern, and a great place to live with no religious intrusion. So most of us see this place as a small blemish on a beautiful place to live. I am an atheist, and almost everyone I know is an atheist or mildly Christian. We respect others' beliefs, but this place is just awful. Not because of their beliefs but because of how people are treated (especially women).

    • @karobythell4425
      @karobythell4425 Год назад

      Im from NZ , and I agree with you wholeheartedly !

    • @meganjones1184
      @meganjones1184 Год назад

      @Karo Bythell I'm just glad I live here. It's starting to look like the witch trials in "the greatest country on earth." Aren't we really lucky to live here. I'm in Hamilton, so I will say I would appreciate a summer next year... just saying🤣

    • @hopetikvah4906
      @hopetikvah4906 Год назад

      There are actually some fringe polygamist groups in NZ

  • @anxiety4daysmusingmedic891
    @anxiety4daysmusingmedic891 Год назад

    I grew up in a fundie christian environment, i was taught the same about the dinosaurs. There is so much to learn about that group! Id be thrilled for you guys to dive into that rabbit hole!

  • @marieugorek5917
    @marieugorek5917 Год назад +1

    Oh, my goodness could I NOT get my husband to express nearly as many opinions about much about our wedding...
    Though I did go into it with an idea about bi-color medieval or renaissance outfits for the wedding party with the same colors but the combinations of colors changing from one person to the next, but he wanted to wear a tux. Also, I wanted silver accents and he wanted gold accents. So my husband, the groomsmen, wore tuxes with cummerbunds and bow ties in the same color combinations as the bridesmaids walking beside them. I and the bridesmaids wore sleeveless dresses with rennaissance corset bodices. His father wore a suit and his mother wore full rennaissance garb, my mother wore a suit dress, and my father wore his kilt with medieval shirt. My husband's cummerbund and bow tie was gold, along with a ribbon and ring tied onto his candle. My dress, train, and veil had silver accents and a silver rink was tied onto my candle with a silver ribbon. Then our unity candle had a band of gold and silver ribbons woven together with linked gold and silver rings linked into it.
    But everything else I asked him about was basically, "whatever you want. hold on what's that? Is that important? That's a decision we need to make?" Boy did I wish he had an opinion.
    the only time I'd heard of a groom picking the bride's dress at all was when one woman asked her husband what color made him happy, and he said, "Yellow, like a daffodil." So she wore a yellow dress with a short ruffly bodice and a row of ruffles around the hem, so she could be a daffodil for him.

  • @learningaswegocitygonecoun6805

    Knowing God return is near. Don't always make people afraid. If you truly know you are saved by
    God's grace, and there is nothing you do to get to heaven except believe. God coming is something to look forward to with joy.

  • @candicewiggins166
    @candicewiggins166 Год назад +1

    My husband was very involved in making all the decisions of our wedding because my family did not want any part of our wedding, if I hadn't had him and his family it would have been much harder for me to do.

  • @GaliSinatra
    @GaliSinatra Год назад +1

    Really interesting! I saw a Ted Talk from Lilia Tarawa in 2017 about her growing up in that cult. It is riveting!

  • @kmackblack
    @kmackblack Год назад

    Can’t wait for the next ones

  • @shopppguril
    @shopppguril Год назад +1

    I am an Orthodox Jew, and we also were taught that dinosaurs were destroyed during the great flood, because for whatever reason there was different animals that weren’t worthy to make it onto the ark. They also explain that it is possible that the flood created such an effect on the world that it appears like the world is a lot older than it is. I find it so fascinating which things are in common amongst all these different ultra-religious groups

  • @orangeisforlovers
    @orangeisforlovers Год назад +3

    The head covering thing is from the Bible (I don’t remember the verse). Mennonites, Hutterites, and the Amish also cover their head for the same reason

    • @Love_cats584
      @Love_cats584 Год назад

      It’s in 1 Corinthians…maybe chapter 11

  • @ellis16
    @ellis16 Год назад

    sam has such a delightful speaking voice!

  • @bethowens8863
    @bethowens8863 Год назад +2

    Ever since I first heard of the FLDS, I honestly wondered whether Neville Cooper (founder of Gloriavale) had taken inspiration from them when he created Gloriavale. (It was founded in the early 70s I believe!) Gloriavale isn't polygamous, but everything from the long dresses to the large families and law of consecration is eerily similar. Another big difference is that Gloriavale has a commune set0up where no one earns any money (FYI, this is actually before the courts right now in NZ as to whether they can be called 'volunteers' or if the church needs to compensate them).
    I've lived in both the U.S. and NZ, and I honestly wonder whether it would be possible to have a perfect consecration system in the U.S. The U.S. is a highly capitalist country where commune systems are still quite strongly associated with communism, and I'm sure that this impacted the effectiveness of what the FLDS was able to do, as culturally isolated as they were. This is less so the case in NZ, which is a lot more left-leaning and does have quite a long history of communal living.

    • @ramonalves9331
      @ramonalves9331 Год назад

      Did you ever stop to think that the Gloriavale Christian Community, the FLDS, the Amish, the Mennonites, the Hutterites, the River Brethren, the Brethren, the Bruderhof, the Charity Ministries, the Old German Baptist Brethren, the Quakers, the Shakers, the Body of Christ, the Twelve Tribes, the IBLP, do they all have much in common?

  • @meghanmantler9476
    @meghanmantler9476 Год назад

    Need the “yes we do!” Always!

  • @stephaniethurlow5931
    @stephaniethurlow5931 Год назад +2

    It is now been taken to court to see if they are working freely there choice or not and the working conditions as some people have said they were forced to work in conditions not suitable have a look at it

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад +1

      Thank you for the update. We plan to look into a lot more about this group as we did not realize how much information was available.

  • @tennygirl79
    @tennygirl79 Год назад +7

    Gloriavale reminds me a lot of the Hutterites in the US.

    • @HannahMitchell-Art
      @HannahMitchell-Art Год назад +3

      Yes I’m pretty sure the man who started this group stayed with them in the US and was inspired that way. But it’s one whole family to one room

    • @lauras2065
      @lauras2065 Год назад +2

      Yeah, kind of Hutterites on steroids feeling

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад +2

      Except the Hutterites have their own homes

  • @themedicdroidx10
    @themedicdroidx10 Год назад

    This was very interesting thank you guys!

  • @helenkapeneakahelzart8690
    @helenkapeneakahelzart8690 Год назад +1

    I'm pretty it started in Australia or the leader was from Australia. It started off as a group of people helping each other with whatever they needed and now it's a community under serious investigation. There are lawsuits underway as we speak. I am from New Zealand and I find it really intriguing

  • @njsmkmmsthatsit3518
    @njsmkmmsthatsit3518 Год назад +2

    Just a heads up to Aussies There is a doco also available right now on free to air, on SBS on demand. Re this same group.

    • @mads597
      @mads597 Год назад +1

      Aussie slang is forever fascinating to me (a boring American)

    • @Mrsksb-cc7my
      @Mrsksb-cc7my Год назад

      I found these docos on Tubi (a free app/service) if it helps any other Aussies 😊

    • @njsmkmmsthatsit3518
      @njsmkmmsthatsit3518 Год назад

      @@mads597👍

  • @colettesargeant6581
    @colettesargeant6581 4 месяца назад

    Can't believe the documentary is no longer on Amazon Prime

  • @ReluctantPost
    @ReluctantPost Год назад

    Moo Chews. They definitely work and sell / export quite a few products outside the community.

  • @ScarlettKay494
    @ScarlettKay494 Год назад +2

    I currently engaged and have similar situation as what Melissa said regarding picking colors! I am in charge of picking colors but only because my fiancé doesn’t really have strong opinions on the matter lol

  • @FaithBurnside
    @FaithBurnside Год назад +3

    Question for Sam. How did the FLDS see the LDS temple(s)?
    Were the just random buildings, or were they holy buildings being essentially desecrated by unfaithful people? Or something else?

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад +1

      Hi Faith! Thank you for question. Sam here... we were told that the LDS temples were being run by apostates or gentiles and for that reason, the work being done inside was not valid. We were told that temples were important and that some day the FLDS would also do temple work. We were not taught about the work for the dead and I remember my father laughing at the idea when he heard about it happening in the LDS temples. I'm not sure what the FLDS plan to do in temples as that was not discussed.

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад +1

      Thank you for being a member of our channel! :)

  • @susanneloving2811
    @susanneloving2811 Год назад

    My husband of 35 years did indeed help with the wedding choices. We mostly made them together but he did have opinions on what he liked and did not like.

  • @CarolynandherClothes
    @CarolynandherClothes Год назад +2

    Yes….my husband was part of the colors….but just like you guys, if I was set on a color, he would have gone along with me.

  • @plantlady7394
    @plantlady7394 3 месяца назад

    It’s fascinating to hear your comparisons in lived experiences. Your response seems to be more of a summary of the documentary than a critical unpacking of the content. (No offense intended.) I wonder if you have seen the more recent documentaries? There is also a lot of good news coverage from New Zealand on RUclips that interviews former members. It really turns on head some of what is shown in these episodes. For instance, the communal working wherein no one gets paid and money goes in to a trust. This is at heart of major court cases in recent years as (mostly former) members describe their experiences as slavery. I went on a RUclips dive several months ago and there was a lot there.

  • @lisahirschlozano823
    @lisahirschlozano823 Год назад

    I've never heard of the husband picking out any wedding gown/reception outfit/etc. My husband didn't see or know what I chose to wear until our wedding day. We did discuss the color of his suit (he chose) and the color of the groomsmen's suits (we decided together). We had a very no-frills, non-traditional wedding though. I had my brother and sister as my wedding party, and he had his two brothers. I let my sister choose the dress she wanted to wear.

  • @sarahg9180
    @sarahg9180 Год назад

    My husband planned our wedding completely. We eloped. We had already started our life together and didn’t necessarily care when/where we got married. I picked a sun dress to wear. It was perfect. I didn’t have to stress about any of it. It was great. We are not fundamentalist Christian though. We already had a house and one child together.

  • @abigailhart3335
    @abigailhart3335 Год назад

    My husband didn’t care about any details of our wedding. He knew I had a vision and let me pick literally everything, including his outfit.

  • @Annaie1234
    @Annaie1234 Год назад

    For any Aussies. Gloriavale: a world apart is on Tubi

  • @tamieaton8445
    @tamieaton8445 Год назад +2

    Something distinctly different to me about Gloriavale versus FLDS and other extreme religious groups, was that there didn’t seem to be anything “secretive“ about their lives. They open up their community once a year to put on shows for other people, which would make one assume that they have nothing to hide. At least with this show, there was nothing that stood out to as particularly concerning. Clearly, it’s not for everybody, but it seems to work for them.

    • @katrinastadler7187
      @katrinastadler7187 Год назад +3

      Alot has come out about the community in the past year that was previously suspected but now the allegations are snowballing and many people leaving for good reason.

    • @tamieaton8445
      @tamieaton8445 Год назад +2

      That’s too bad. I’ll have to look up the latest stuff.

    • @hopetikvah4906
      @hopetikvah4906 Год назад +2

      Trust me, as someone quite connected with the community, that's exactly what they want you to think, but there is a LOT they aren't showing. They are extremely careful about their public image.

  • @OriSnori
    @OriSnori Год назад

    Sam, you're on a roll in this video, you just made me LOL twice, and I almost never laugh while watching videos.
    Now I wanna hear YOU belly laugh!

  • @lesleymoses7852
    @lesleymoses7852 Год назад

    I think the group started in the 60s with 6 founding members. An uncle of mine has visited the group on off for the last 20 years.

  • @paulytenicholes6627
    @paulytenicholes6627 6 месяцев назад

    Awesome documentary

  • @laurenturner3578
    @laurenturner3578 Год назад

    In my experience, the grooms often don't care as much about colors compared to wives. Every couple is different, but typically that's my experience. I did ask my husband about preferences and he requested I leave my hair down, which was the opposite of what I had imagined doing - but that didn't bother me because I wasn't really dressing up for me, exactly. He left his glasses of for me too.
    I don't think it would've bothered me if my husband had chosen the dress color. I would've been happy that he was happy.

  • @AZensibleOption
    @AZensibleOption Год назад +4

    I was curious if you guys see the LDS as a cult. There’s a couple of times I noticed when talking about or to ex-FLDS/-Order/-AUB members that you all compare it to LDS like it’s the “norm,” which I understand completely. I’ve just been meaning to ask for a few day now. Thanks for all the insight you’ve given.

    • @aznmochibunny
      @aznmochibunny Год назад +2

      I'm sure in some ways they do see it as a cult, but I think they make the comparisons since the FLDS has a lot of origins in the LDS and is a branch off. Both were LDS (Sam after he left the FLDS and Melissa raised into it), so it's easy for them to make the comparison to LDS as a basis.

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад +11

      We try to avoid the world cult because of the negative connotation with it and as a way to try and be respectful to our families that are still in both the FLDS and the LDS. However, we do understand that most extreme religions have characteristics that align with the definition of a cult.

    • @AZensibleOption
      @AZensibleOption Год назад +3

      @@GrowingUpinPolygamy That makes perfect sense. I believe that my mother-in-law is the last of our family that still subscribes to a religion, and that’s probably bc we’re heathens from the northeast. Secularism is definitely, if nothing else, easier to live in places like NY (near Buffalo) - religion mostly seems to be considered more of a tradition or obligation as opposed to true belief or God-fearing devotion here. I’m sorry if I came off harsh at all in the way I posed the question. And thank you so much for your answer.

    • @mads597
      @mads597 Год назад +2

      @@AZensibleOption fellow northeastern heathen checking in

    • @MsFitz134
      @MsFitz134 Год назад

      I don't mean to speak for Sam and Melissa but just to give my two cents as someone with a similar background. I was raised LDS in Utah and from my perspective theres different levels of "cult" - it's a spectrum without a solid definition. There are the isolated groups who want to stay isolated, like the FLDS and Gloriavale. And there are more mainstream groups whose members are not isolated from the world, like Mormons and other conservative religious movements.
      I think the more mainstream religious groups (and honestly almost any kind of group or organization, from political parties to fandoms) have the potential for people to develop cult-like mentalities, where people become so devoted to the group that it becomes their whole personality and they have difficulty relating to those on the "outside". But these groups aren't always cults for everyone, if that makes sense. Many members of these groups are independent thinkers and don't always align with the group or allow their entire lives to revolve around their church. I guess what I'm trying to say is from my observation within the LDS, knowing a thousand+ members personally over my lifetime, some have a cult-like relationship with the church, and others do not. Some allow the church to have a cult-level of control over their lives, and others don't. If I'm asked if the LDS is a cult, I say it is sometimes for some people.

  • @bonniebrown5557
    @bonniebrown5557 Год назад

    The granddaughter of one of leader's has TED talk really interesting on how she was treated. And how/why left.

  • @tennygirl79
    @tennygirl79 Год назад +2

    I watched a Ted talk from someone who was from Gloriavale. Then I say this documentary which I found interesting.

    • @blimeyhermione07
      @blimeyhermione07 Год назад +1

      I saw that Ted talk too! It was riveting and heartbreaking.

    • @delphinedelphinedelphine
      @delphinedelphinedelphine Год назад

      the min and the wimin wohkin on the fahm... It is a fascinating video and the accent was such a bonus for me

  • @gcarr5355
    @gcarr5355 Год назад

    Would love to hear you speak about the communal group the Twelve Tribes. They also live in a similar way

  • @MissTirsty
    @MissTirsty Год назад

    It was started in canterbury New Zealand (the south island in 1969)

  • @mienafriggstad3360
    @mienafriggstad3360 Год назад

    Now days it is much more common for the husband to be to be involved in choosing wedding colours. Some husbands to be do help choose the wedding dress. I didn't have any of those experiences; my husband let me, my mom and his mom choose everything; 24 yrs ago. All my husband said is I don't want to wear a dress coat or tux; so we went with just a vest and tie with dress pants.

  • @michellesunshinestar
    @michellesunshinestar Год назад +1

    Hutterites are like them. A lot of Christians believe it's coming soon. I think it's not because of how much history of Christianity.

  • @kerriheadrick5475
    @kerriheadrick5475 Год назад +2

    Some of the men in Gloriavale do have jobs outside. I know one guy was a pilot. Some on farms.

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад

      Interesting. Thank you for the update!

    • @mienafriggstad3360
      @mienafriggstad3360 Год назад

      I stopped this video a few minutes into it; and watched two short documentarys on u-tube by x- Gloriavill residents. Including a pilot. Who reminded me of Sam. Because they both had jobs and good experiences with the outside world before leaving the group they grew up in. Then I continued watching this video.

  • @nataliechalmers1068
    @nataliechalmers1068 Год назад

    NZ is such a tiny country 500 church members is huge

  • @EphraimsMum
    @EphraimsMum Год назад

    The yearly concert they do is a way they get tax exemptions for charities. One of the requirements is that you provide a service for the wider community here in NZ. Religious groups get it if they teach their beliefs to the public.

  • @franny5059
    @franny5059 Год назад +2

    I became social media friendly with the daughter Miracle and granddaughter Lillia of the cult leader, and if you listen to this story, it’s unbelievable

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад

      We look forward to hearing more of the stories from those who have left.

  • @athanksgivingbaby570
    @athanksgivingbaby570 11 месяцев назад

    The founder of this community, Hopeful Christian, is now a convicted sex offender.
    His granddaughter, Lilia Tarawa - who is featured in this series has a great interview about what it was like growing up in this community and what was really happening when the cameras weren't there. Its well worth watching after you watch this series.

  • @rebeccaiwarere7202
    @rebeccaiwarere7202 Год назад +1

    Creationism doesn't sound crazy to me. I am a creationist and a Christian. But I respect christians who aren't creationists.

  • @leanagoosen363
    @leanagoosen363 Год назад

    The Bruderhof also have this shared within the community

  • @opienattyvlogs7930
    @opienattyvlogs7930 Год назад

    I picked the colors for my wedding but my husband loved my choice he let me do most of the planning

  • @amandan943
    @amandan943 Год назад

    They did mention Paul and Pearl were third and fourth generations in gloriavale

  • @FaithBurnside
    @FaithBurnside Год назад

    In my experience the bride picks the colors, but the guy usually can have input if they feel really strongly about a color

  • @rubyoliver2942
    @rubyoliver2942 Год назад

    Hi another kiwi commenting here - interestingly right now some ex members are taking Gloriavale to court to try and get compensation for all of the unpaid work that they did - claiming that it is forced and not voluntary - who knows how it will go

  • @wendyrock4260
    @wendyrock4260 Год назад

    I think it woulc be great to live in a small community that regular socializes, and works together in a loving way. My dream community would not be religious other than having simple rules of kindness. It seems like we had some of this in the past. Can't say I know any of my neighbors.

  • @albertito77
    @albertito77 Месяц назад

    As far as I can tell, a significant number (a majority?) of Gloriavale leavers remain devout Protestant Christians. This does not appear to me to be the case with ex Mormon Fundamentalists. Sam seems to have been somewhat of an outlier in that he converted to mainstream LDS upon leaving. This seems to be a difference between mainstream Christianity and the Mormon traditions.

  • @whiteraven69
    @whiteraven69 Год назад

    What is very difficult as you are aware , these closed groups often hide child sexual/physical abuse and domestic violence. As a Child Protective Services Specialist’s investigating reports in these communities is extremely difficult . In our State we have The Old Believers Russian Orthodox , they have several rather large rural communities . They are for the most part very self sufficient raising their own cows, meat and dairy ..they have fishing boats , which provides them subsistence fish .

  • @missamanda2703
    @missamanda2703 Год назад

    I didn't really have a favorite color, but my husband loves blue so we had light blue and dark blue.

  • @lindsaywilliams7865
    @lindsaywilliams7865 Год назад +1

    I wanted my fiancé to help me wedding plan. He gave me certain things he wants. When it came to colors he doesn’t care according to him 😂

  • @janesmith9024
    @janesmith9024 Год назад

    I have been following this group for a long time and they are very interesting (not perfect, but who is?). They were the Cooperites to start with (but changed name probably in part because of N Cooper's jail sentence). I think I may have seen this particular series online but not sure and UK Amazon Prime is not showing now it is available. There are pros and cons of all these groups and it is good that both sides - those in there who like it and those who left are free to make their own programmes.

  • @stevenmorris9719
    @stevenmorris9719 Месяц назад

    Nowadays men seem to plan the wedding more than ever. I recall when it was completely up to the bride! Still, seems apparent God has no set rules. Scary if someone hands over their will. God gives us free will.

  • @lillianward2810
    @lillianward2810 Год назад

    There was a TED Talk by a woman who left Gloriavale. I forget her name but I believe her grandfather founded the group.

  • @TheCrummyArtist
    @TheCrummyArtist Год назад

    Mics both sound good!!

  • @DJJulesAdventures
    @DJJulesAdventures Год назад

    Dinos on the ark...you should visit the Ark Encounter in Kentucky. An interesting theory.

  • @shalomweston6562
    @shalomweston6562 2 месяца назад

    It's probably better if you watch Escaping Utopia or Gloriavale the documentary. The one that you watched is done by Gloriavale themselves so they have controlled of the narrative on what has been shown.

  • @ATiredMom
    @ATiredMom 6 месяцев назад

    I like the fact that there are truly a variety of beliefs within Biblical Christianity around science and the creation of the world. When you study how things like carbon dating is really done you realize that the age of the earth, fossils, etc really is not something that can be completely determined fact by either side. A lot of it is still theories. Personally, I believe in God, and I believe he could have created the world any way he wanted. Old earth, new earth, evolution, 7 days of creation... Not really hills that are worth dying on for me. We can't really 'prove' any of it through science bc science does need observation. But the records we have of prophecies of Jesus and the evidence we have that he really walked the earth and actually resurrected us pretty strong. Nothing is 100%, even your own personal observation/memory can't always be 100% trusted bc of how we know our brains work. But, we can live by a worldview that seems most portable and what seems to answers life's tough questions the best. So many want to be 100% certain, but we have to be honest with how the world works. Nothing is really "certain".

  • @okaylady8692
    @okaylady8692 Год назад +1

    Did I miss something, I've watched this entire documentary now, and the entire thing sounds like a positive ad campaign. Lol I saw some comments about a husband getting sick and not being able to treated etc. I don't see any of that in the doc. Am I possibly watching the wrong show???

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад +1

      It definitely has a very positive vibe to this particular documentary. We are now hearing that there are a lot of stories from those that have left that share some of the darker side of things within the community. We are looking forward to watching and reacting to those as well in the future.

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад +2

      It is a propaganda documentary and I’m intrigued to see initial reactions from Sam and Melissa. I had the same impressions until I studied further also!!😆

    • @okaylady8692
      @okaylady8692 Год назад

      @Growing Up in Polygamy I had to investigate after I listened to your video. I knew the Doc. couldn't be right. Thank you for sharing this, I had never heard of the group before. I really enjoy hearing perspectives from the two of you!

  • @jeanspeer4053
    @jeanspeer4053 Год назад

    Most men don’t really care about reception colors and leave it to the bride who most likely has a strong opinion about how she want her wedding to look. Now , of course, there are always exceptions to the rule.

  • @michellesunshinestar
    @michellesunshinestar Год назад

    The activities/employment person here in the building asked us what we wanted to do. I said, not work but volunteer. I love volunteering, but my eyesight sucks right now.

  • @hasaheadachenow
    @hasaheadachenow Год назад +2

    Why the prairie dresses. ? Is that in the Bible somewhere, that says dress that way?

    • @GrowingUpinPolygamy
      @GrowingUpinPolygamy  Год назад

      I don't think it is in the Bible. I think it is just a way to be extremely modest and seem very "traditional" in the role of a woman. It is super interesting that so many groups are like this.

    • @hasaheadachenow
      @hasaheadachenow Год назад

      @@GrowingUpinPolygamy I just wonder …I mean you can dress modestly in todays fashion.. why prairie dress ? I suppose it’s to make them stand out? Or to treat them like cattle , all look the same? Why all look the same? What’s the symbolic meaning to how the women dress. I mean the men don’t all dress alike? Maybe I’m going too deep here. And the men don’t stand out in public? So why do the women have to? What would happen if these women woke up one day and put on a pair of jeans and a hoodie?

  • @erinkendrick3412
    @erinkendrick3412 Год назад

    The Hutterites work in the community as well. No bills.

  • @heidiclarke2333
    @heidiclarke2333 Год назад +3

    I do think a lot of problems teenagers have nowadays is because they aren't expected to contribute, when you see families who work together and expected teenagers to be responsible etc , they are much more rounded, if you think back 200 +years ago teenagers would be having their own families or running the farm /homestead while dad was off fighting a war . UK viewer here.

    • @mads597
      @mads597 Год назад

      Teenagers, as a recognized age group, didn’t really exist until postwar 1950s because they hadn’t yet had the social opportunity to BE teens. Too busy being pushed into adult roles. There’s definitely a healthy medium but it’s not healthy for teens to be starting their own families. They’re not even fully grown.

    • @China-Clay
      @China-Clay Год назад

      Would be nice if these teenagers were at least allowed Tylenol (panadol), they were denied most healthcare basics

  • @starrcrossreardon
    @starrcrossreardon Год назад +1

    I don't have an issue with "surrendering to God"... if they were surrendering to the church- that would raise flags.

  • @steph744
    @steph744 Год назад

    looks like it would be so interesting to pay them a visit and work with them for a couple of weeks.

  • @daec4167
    @daec4167 Год назад

    I think it depends on the couple.

  • @amyjune8329
    @amyjune8329 Год назад

    That is how they also are able to have the tax status like the other churches do like their tax-exempt status or whatever. But if you do go and watch the things on RUclips from the people that have actually left there you're seeing that like everything this isn't what they actually show on the cameras.

  • @halfassfashion
    @halfassfashion Год назад

    It’s perverse that there’s an audience debating consummation