@@mattlandsiedel definitely. For a heterosexual male like me, it has been a particularly challenging journey, because you don't belong to the "typical" men's world neither to the gay men world lol. Plus, not many women understand it, either. But it is very rewarding and empowering to be able to be yourself and understand your value, I think that's the first step into building a solid self-steem and from where you will start vibing with the right people and potential partners.
My therapist identified me as a highly sensitive person, and after a few years of intensive therapy and self-improvement, my entire perception of my sexuality shifted. I'm a straight man, but grew up in a repressive environment. Because of societal programming I believed I needed to be the nice guy, a perfect gentleman, the romantic vanilla type, and I rejected masculine gender stereotypes. I now realize that I was conflating sensuality with vanilla. I like being sensual and moving slowly but I'm more of the kinky type. I like submissive and hyper-feminine women, and I like to be dominant and feel hyper-masculine in bed. I don't see any contradiction in being a masculine man yet also embracing my feminine energy. It's insane how everything shifted within me once I started listening to myself and embracing my authentic desires.
What a beautiful realization to have. I am really happy to hear that you are embodying more of your authentic sexual nature. And good on your therapist for recognizing you’re an HSP 👍🏼✨
That would be the perfect balance for someone like me. A man who has worked on himself and has done the inner work, and continues to do so. But is kinky and dominant. Just perfect!
I get more attracted to a guy when he rejects me 😭. Because I’m sensitive so I want to please him and fix him and understand him. It’s a childhood abandonment wound. I’m aware of it but I can’t help how it goes, I’ve done shadow work and child healing. Nothing helps. I’m. Rey sensitive to everything. Sex is so special to me. I want to connect and be intimate during sex but also I’m scared of being hurt.
I’ve struggled with these exact issues my entire life. I’m only now beginning to understand them & I’m 50 years old. Thank you for being here for us Matt. Also, love that your cat had a cameo in this video 🐱 Light & Love to you 🙏
Never too late to learn new things about yourself. I plan on keep growing until the day I die. Thanks for being a part of this community and sharing yourself with us ❤️
I’m super private about my experiences. I don’t like when my partner references them as a light thing. It has to be intimate and trusting experience too.
Thanks Matt, 8/8, but much of this is common sense of being an in tune caring partner. However it clearly is not common knowledge Or practised. thank you for sharing and articulating
The fact that you explained so much to me in this video is amazing, but the crying I have experienced during sex has always escaped me. Thank you for clearing this up for me. Hope to get coaching from you at some point. I am so needing it. Thank you for your Free content.
And we can't help our level of perceptiveness, detail noticing and some people feel scrutinized by simple observations that we speak on. Even if it's not judgemental but maybe a curiosity or statement. I resonate so much with SPS/HSP and being an Empath.
Wonderful content Matt! Thank you for doing your personal work and helping the rest of us HSP's embrace who we are. 💞 I missed step # 6. Or, was that a Pleasure/Pain separation (steps 5&6)?
Cant thank u enough for your videos... I am learning not to be so hard on myself. And your content, thoughts, and knowledge have giving me so much! From my soul I greet and ardmire you! Thanks for being a light, a little spark, a flame 🙏✨
Awe this is a beautiful comment to receive. Thank you and I am glad you are finding value here in the community. It’s great to see you sharing so openly with us ❤️
Thankyou for this good, interesting & helpful video. I always knew i was sensitive, but recently I have realized that I am a highly sensitive person. I've always needed to know that if I'm going to have s#x with someone I've got to really have that emotional connection with them, I've got to know that they really care about me and understand me. God, nearly all my ex partners were completely wrong for me. They did not care about my feelings, only their own feelings !!! I put up with it because of alot of trauma growing up in my family. Also I've known since i was a teenager that i was attracted to girls too. For alot of years i couldn't tell anyone. I've told a few people now. I love the idea of having a boyfriend and a girlfriend. I actually would love to find my twin flame. 💖💖💖💖💖🔥🔥💖💖💖💖💖
Thank you so much for shedding light on this topic. It’s taken decades of hard work overcoming childhood trauma, coming out, and discovering I was a HSP, and as a result I just repressed my sexuality because I didn’t understand myself never mind having someone else try to understand me. As my healing continues and I embrace a new sense of spirituality people like you help me feel connected and I now embrace my sensitive gifts. Hopefully that will include a healthy sexual awakening. (Which at 50 is a wee bit scary.)
Thank you so much for this video Matt. While it was not entirely new information for me I found it to be incredibly confirming of my own experience as well as what I want in a sexual relationship. Perhaps it has been a little easier for me to embrace my sensitivity because I identify as a transgender female and wholly embrace my feminine side especially as it relates to sex. I look forward to watching more of your videos.
I think these traits are in a highly sensitive person because he thinks is weak(limiting belief that sensitivity is weakness - so we are highly sensitive at emotions, light, sound, smell ) but if changing these beliefs into sensitivity equals strongness those "sensitivities" are not so much going to affect us. Remember that if you are a Highly sensitive no one is teaching and educate you from the beggining about sensitivity and those beliefs you are taking them from the culture( sensitivity=weakness and softness-inferiority ) you have to be aware of those beliefs that are influencing deeply the raport to sensitivity and how you perceive it -the difference between hiding and empowered
Thank you for your video. For me the spiritual is interrelated to sex and attraction. So I’m with someone now where just holding her hand there’s a beautiful quality where I go and not a space of being pure light and it’s like I’m not doing anything just letting this quality flow. Kind of like it’s not me doing it it’s the life force that’s doing this. So we have been together for five months now and have not had intercourse but that’s not a problem as just liking each other is fulfilling in itself. I have however struggled with this much of my life with shame and other things. I think that sex or relating without that spiritual energy is not for me, but I have many years in terms of age presently and for me the spiritual energy is so much stronger than the sexual energy; and I just want to integrate the two. I’m happy to say that over a lifetime I’m at this place.
New to your channel~subbed! 💜Thank you ~ I was an enigma unto myself until I learned about HSP through the books HSP & HSP In Love. Looking forward to watching your other videos! It’s a difficult trait to deal with but with many gifts as well🙌
Awesome sauce! Great to have you here and I hope you continue to find value here. If you haven’t already join my community on Instagram @inspiredtobeauthentic where you will find all my written content ❤️
Am i the only one who picks up on another person's sexual energy? I have learned in the last six months that I was being influenced by my partner's sexual energy. And I let myself be led. I lost my voice in this relationship. I am usually very vocal about what I want but with this guy I would let him lead. It was a terrible experience.
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Mindblowing. That's me. Thank you!
Glad it resonated with you! Embracing our sensitivities can be empowering.
@@mattlandsiedel definitely. For a heterosexual male like me, it has been a particularly challenging journey, because you don't belong to the "typical" men's world neither to the gay men world lol. Plus, not many women understand it, either. But it is very rewarding and empowering to be able to be yourself and understand your value, I think that's the first step into building a solid self-steem and from where you will start vibing with the right people and potential partners.
My therapist identified me as a highly sensitive person, and after a few years of intensive therapy and self-improvement, my entire perception of my sexuality shifted. I'm a straight man, but grew up in a repressive environment. Because of societal programming I believed I needed to be the nice guy, a perfect gentleman, the romantic vanilla type, and I rejected masculine gender stereotypes. I now realize that I was conflating sensuality with vanilla. I like being sensual and moving slowly but I'm more of the kinky type. I like submissive and hyper-feminine women, and I like to be dominant and feel hyper-masculine in bed. I don't see any contradiction in being a masculine man yet also embracing my feminine energy. It's insane how everything shifted within me once I started listening to myself and embracing my authentic desires.
What a beautiful realization to have. I am really happy to hear that you are embodying more of your authentic sexual nature. And good on your therapist for recognizing you’re an HSP 👍🏼✨
That would be the perfect balance for someone like me. A man who has worked on himself and has done the inner work, and continues to do so. But is kinky and dominant. Just perfect!
I get more attracted to a guy when he rejects me 😭. Because I’m sensitive so I want to please him and fix him and understand him. It’s a childhood abandonment wound. I’m aware of it but I can’t help how it goes, I’ve done shadow work and child healing. Nothing helps. I’m. Rey sensitive to everything. Sex is so special to me. I want to connect and be intimate during sex but also I’m scared of being hurt.
I’ve struggled with these exact issues my entire life. I’m only now beginning to understand them & I’m 50 years old. Thank you for being here for us Matt. Also, love that your cat had a cameo in this video 🐱 Light & Love to you 🙏
Never too late to learn new things about yourself. I plan on keep growing until the day I die. Thanks for being a part of this community and sharing yourself with us ❤️
I’m super private about my experiences. I don’t like when my partner references them as a light thing. It has to be intimate and trusting experience too.
I would also add general physiological hyper-arousal, which for me produces anxiety and I will need to reset by slowing way down.
Thanks for sharing! It's crucial to listen to your body and pace yourself.
This is so helpful! I couldn't even describe how or what I was feeling until watched this video 💚
I’m glad it resonated and helped you feel seen ❤️
Thanks Matt, 8/8, but much of this is common sense of being an in tune caring partner. However it clearly is not common knowledge Or practised. thank you for sharing and articulating
Yes I can’t agree more. How are we the odd ones when this makes so much sense to just treat your partner with love and respect.
The fact that you explained so much to me in this video is amazing, but the crying I have experienced during sex has always escaped me. Thank you for clearing this up for me. Hope to get coaching from you at some point. I am so needing it. Thank you for your Free content.
And we can't help our level of perceptiveness, detail noticing and some people feel scrutinized by simple observations that we speak on. Even if it's not judgemental but maybe a curiosity or statement. I resonate so much with SPS/HSP and being an Empath.
This video put words to something I've been struggling to understand about myself but couldn't quite articulate. Thank you so much for sharing 💙
Wonderful content Matt! Thank you for doing your personal work and helping the rest of us HSP's embrace who we are. 💞 I missed step # 6. Or, was that a Pleasure/Pain separation (steps 5&6)?
Cant thank u enough for your videos... I am learning not to be so hard on myself. And your content, thoughts, and knowledge have giving me so much! From my soul I greet and ardmire you! Thanks for being a light, a little spark, a flame 🙏✨
Awe this is a beautiful comment to receive. Thank you and I am glad you are finding value here in the community. It’s great to see you sharing so openly with us ❤️
Thankyou for this good, interesting & helpful video. I always knew i was sensitive, but recently I have realized that I am a highly sensitive person. I've always needed to know that if I'm going to have s#x with someone I've got to really have that emotional connection with them, I've got to know that they really care about me and understand me. God, nearly all my ex partners were completely wrong for me. They did not care about my feelings, only their own feelings !!! I put up with it because of alot of trauma growing up in my family. Also I've known since i was a teenager that i was attracted to girls too. For alot of years i couldn't tell anyone. I've told a few people now. I love the idea of having a boyfriend and a girlfriend. I actually would love to find my twin flame. 💖💖💖💖💖🔥🔥💖💖💖💖💖
Thank you so much for shedding light on this topic. It’s taken decades of hard work overcoming childhood trauma, coming out, and discovering I was a HSP, and as a result I just repressed my sexuality because I didn’t understand myself never mind having someone else try to understand me. As my healing continues and I embrace a new sense of spirituality people like you help me feel connected and I now embrace my sensitive gifts. Hopefully that will include a healthy sexual awakening. (Which at 50 is a wee bit scary.)
Thank you for so clearly speaking about 8 reasons why HSP’s are different in sex.
Are HSP's clingy (in a good way)?
Thank you so much for this video Matt. While it was not entirely new information for me I found it to be incredibly confirming of my own experience as well as what I want in a sexual relationship. Perhaps it has been a little easier for me to embrace my sensitivity because I identify as a transgender female and wholly embrace my feminine side especially as it relates to sex. I look forward to watching more of your videos.
Guess I am embracing this one for life
Just realized that I am a empath and now I'm very interested here
I think these traits are in a highly sensitive person because he thinks is weak(limiting belief that sensitivity is weakness - so we are highly sensitive at emotions, light, sound, smell ) but if changing these beliefs into sensitivity equals strongness those "sensitivities" are not so much going to affect us. Remember that if you are a Highly sensitive no one is teaching and educate you from the beggining about sensitivity and those beliefs you are taking them from the culture( sensitivity=weakness and softness-inferiority ) you have to be aware of those beliefs that are influencing deeply the raport to sensitivity and how you perceive it -the difference between hiding and empowered
Absolutely, changing those beliefs can transform how we experience sensitivity. Thanks for sharing!
I am an empath, but I also people please when making love. Thank you for your video. I will look inside myself to get away from the people pleasing.
Thank you for your video. For me the spiritual is interrelated to sex and attraction. So I’m with someone now where just holding her hand there’s a beautiful quality where I go and not a space of being pure light and it’s like I’m not doing anything just letting this quality flow. Kind of like it’s not me doing it it’s the life force that’s doing this. So we have been together for five months now and have not had intercourse but that’s not a problem as just liking each other is fulfilling in itself. I have however struggled with this much of my life with shame and other things. I think that sex or relating without that spiritual energy is not for me, but I have many years in terms of age presently and for me the spiritual energy is so much stronger than the sexual energy; and I just want to integrate the two. I’m happy to say that over a lifetime I’m at this place.
New to your channel~subbed! 💜Thank you ~ I was an enigma unto myself until I learned about HSP through the books HSP & HSP In Love. Looking forward to watching your other videos! It’s a difficult trait to deal with but with many gifts as well🙌
Awesome sauce! Great to have you here and I hope you continue to find value here. If you haven’t already join my community on Instagram @inspiredtobeauthentic where you will find all my written content ❤️
Am i the only one who picks up on another person's sexual energy? I have learned in the last six months that I was being influenced by my partner's sexual energy. And I let myself be led. I lost my voice in this relationship. I am usually very vocal about what I want but with this guy I would let him lead. It was a terrible experience.