How Narcissists Plan Ahead
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- Опубликовано: 25 авг 2023
- If you're a woman feeling trapped in a toxic relationship and looking for freedom, you've come to the right place. With over 3000+ clients, I've integrated everything I've learned into a comprehensive program designed to help you reclaim your freedom. My goal is to guide you to break free without confronting or trying to fix him. Together, let's rediscover YOU and cultivate your confidence and clarity. To take the next step in your healing journey with me, visit www.rawmotivations.com/breakt...
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If you're a man struggling with narcissistic traits and seeking the path, community, and transformation that I've experienced, I'm here to help - but only if you are serious about investing the time and energy. To begin this journey with me, schedule a session at www.rawmotivations.com/break-...
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Tune in to hear the perspective of a self aware narcissist. That’s me - Ben Taylor a narcissist in recovery trying to promote awareness, healing, growth and change. I do that by these videos on here, TikTok, Instagram and Facebook.
Platforms I am on:
TikTok - / raw_motivations
Instagram - / rawmotivations
Facebook - profile.php?...
Podcast - anchor.fm/rawmotivations
RUclips - / rawmotivations
They are never 10 steps ahead, they are 10 steps behind and always will be.
I've either been smeared or praised for how amazing I am. Just extremes.
same
Yep!!!
Same here.
My ex husband has to be a psychopath
Me as well
Right on
Everything he said was dead on accurate. This all happened to me and more. I was lucky enough to have had access to things most people never would to prove all the negative, horrible things that were being done to me behind my back. Since you probably won't get the hard proof like I was so fortunate to get TRUST YOUR GUT.
Thank you for your experience
The odd thing about the smear campaign is that when the narcissist comes back to you (and they usually do) is how they explain to everyone how suddenly you were okay to stay with after all. Also, they start the smearing way in advance so that when they eventually do leave you everyone will think how patient they've been and everyone will also assume that the narc has been the one who has actually been working on the relationship. Multi-faceted and dimensional freak show.
To realize that this is how my Mom works is actually mind boggling.
Cognitive dissonance on steroids 🤦♀️
All of that
That's what happened to me. I found out that my ex started lying about me years before discarding me. It was also a way to get his various girlfriends to focus on me as the "bad guy" when he didn't want to take responsibility, or when he wanted them to feel jealous.
@@rachael_grey Yes I understand and know the pain you felt. The ex was, I believe triangulating with his ex our entire marriage. He denies this of course. He spoke badly of her to me as well all the while playing us both. He wants to reconcile now and there is no way. I found out that he moved secretly to where she lives in another state and still claims love for me. Using words like always and forever…. I’m going to start no contact soon but I’m somewhat concerned for financial retribution
God will provide for me…I trust Him 😊
I believe I am just to old and damaged to heal from this anymore.
Time is on our side & not on the narcissist… after nearly 6 months no contact I have beat the trauma bond & only have some cognitive dissonance surfacing now as rumination ❤️🩹 but I am aware of why it was a no win situation so stop beating yourself up too & let the healing process take it’s course ❤
Thanks for the support. I'm dealing with my Mom and I'm an old man. The scars are way deep.@@caroleminke6116
Just getting away from them will do you a world of good.
Practice self love and get your gut feeling and intuition back will also get your self respect back and help keep these types of people out.
I see a dog there, so that dog is a great friend, and you can and you will heal, be with the ones who appreciate you the most.
Then you really do not have a second more to spend with such a person:-)
It seems like an awful lot of work for a narcissist to do all of this! Insane!
I have a friend who didn't respond to me when I express how lonely i am. She didn't want to respond to me until I try to follow up. Also we made plan to get together and she said the weekend still work. When the weekend came she cancel plan because she feels like has no energy and she needs to reschedule our plan. But then she never really tell me when we can meet up. Is this a sign that she is narcissist?
When I left I told him I don't know who he is going to blame for everything now. I am no contact and plan on staying this way.
I’m so tired of it all. As a target that was set up for 10-15 years I can’t think of anything that could just waste a life like being with a narcissist. It’s devastating to learn I was on a chess board and it was all a lie.
I divorced a malignant narc then dealt with all the same BS with a covert narc and I just didn’t understand it at first bc he was so damn shrewd, a therapist, and really conniving.
My wife and I had a blip 10 months ago I found text messages to a lad who works at her place and snapchats I packed my things and she said don’t leave he’s not intrested in me I’m sorry so I stayed worked on the marriage been together 12 years and then 4 month later she had a break down and went to her parents came home and said it’s her she’s full of anxiety she’s sorry it’s still a blip we work everything out and then bang august I ain’t happy I want a divorce I’m a bout to have an operation we have a child together I got my stuff packed and moved out and I said I hope he’s worth it you narcissist and I’ve went no contact but only for our child she constantly angry has multiple personalities always has to plan everything or has to have something to look forward to it hurts but I’m glad I’m out and I ain’t going back
Thanks for sharing your story and you are strong for being able to open and vulnerable....hope you are doing better these days!
…mine always bragged about how strategic he is…💔💚
I’ve definitely felt like I’m playing checkers to her chess game; like I’ve always been 5 moves behind.
After 10 years she began to progressively treat me and my kids worse. Next thing you know she’s telling me to get out and was already making moves for life without me, including her own bank account (that she moved the money to) and systematically removed me from everything joint in the house.
I feel so stupid.
The horror movie has three parts: Lovebombing, devalue, and discard. 😂
I know I am an empath if they even exist. I cannot be a narcissist because I refuse to be put in an arena like a trained seal to balance a ball on my nose.❤
Yup, that part about them using your shoulder to cry on about their relationship. I fell for it. And the entire 3yrs they were cheating
Thesevpatterns are amazing, aren't ty hey?
Got some big things going on here now Ben. I can't even type in "Hello how are you doing" without being ☹"Red Letter Return Error Yeeted" punished for trying to communicate with you. This is really all getting pointless now. If you only knew how many times this has happened. And how it picks on me. And how it hounds my heels. You'd buy me a cold beer for sure. They're making it where it really won't be worth the effort to try to keep this up no matter what anybody does. Now it surely predictably will let this comment go right thru in "Reactive Abuse" so I look like the crazy 1...Right?
For me, my wife began the smear campaign first. Her friends thought incase a terrible person. Then in one instance, her friend was trying to protect her from me and it resulted in a big argument between her friend and I. We were separated at the time. When the friend learned that my wife had just had me spend three consecutive nights with her the weekend before, the mask stated coming off. When she saw that I'm not the bad guy my wife had made me out to be, she withdrew and my wife ultimately ended their relationship so she wouldn't have to be accountable to her friend for her lies. Her other friends didn't know this happened and they continued to support her in her narrative. The new supply included. The boundaries I tried to establish were being put there because she was playing a game with me giving me false hope. Actions showing she wanted reconciliation, contradicted by hateful words. Then loving and kind words giving false hope followed by actions that contradicted those words. It was very confusing. I wanted to save our marriage and family so I played the game for a long time. When I began to force accountability, the narcissistic rage, and reactive abuse got to be extreme. She would push all my buttons, making me incredibly hurt and angry and then play the victim....and run to the new supply.
I’m praying for you. The ex…well there are no words adequate to describe it all
Well described! After that confusion it's hard to even remember all the details and chronology of that crazy making chaos.
Wishing you all the best.
@@avgonyma1 Exactly. He’s a reprobate…devoid of honesty and transparency. The Lord removed me from it and I didn’t even realize that I needed Him to. I thought of it as something I had done wrong and the Lord showed me that the ex’s rejection is Gods protection. It’s taken some major events in my life the past 3 years to really understand. I wish the best for you as well You deserve it.
gotta love a bit of triangulation...
@@darkuma1692 lol I e had enough to last a lifetime!
Mine did all three. I am working on my exit from the marriage. He walked out, but hasn't filed for a divorce.
I can relate to this so much as its being done to me now but I'm realizing he did the same with his ex to me its so sad and heart breaking but this is definitely making it easier to move on and heal
I have experienced all of this!!! Thank you for your very practical examples.
Exactly my case!! Every single thing he stated in the video!!
You're so welcome! I'm here to support you on your healing journey. If you need assistance, please schedule a one-on-one session with me at www.rawmotivations.com
It is so true about future partners, I needed a time to realise that his future partner is his ex student already cheating on me from decades.
My husband did this exact thing repeatedly. He's actively doing it now.
Even when she discarded me it felt like that was written down centuries ago ready to use.
Yes!
In case the victim has evidence of his cheating .. chats etc... how would he proceed? Would it be any different since he knows the truth will be out if ever he discards her?
My Cov Narc "wife" planned on me through "buying" "our" mobile home FOUR YEARS BEFORE I THOUGHT WE BOUGHT IT TOGETHER! She had been making rental payments on a vacant home and had intended to make it my future DISCARD HOUSE and place where she intended to end the marriage, push me out and move into it with her "real man." For good measure, she was likely "visiting" with him when she could during those 4 years and I believe it helped her "clean up" after lovemaking so that I would not be able to suspect she was cheating again when she returned to the apartment that I thought we were living in at the time! The time she had rented "our" future house corresponded to the year I confronted her about cheating! The limmerance was distressingly obvious! I'm just happy that this nightmare of my life(wife) is OVER!😁
I keep on telling her she’s going to be so much happier without me response “ don’t make promises you can’t keep”. Covert malignant
Yup, he is walking around now calling me crazy. He is such a covert
He told me that once and I said then don't mess with me!
She wrote a book under a pseudo name author about her sexual freedom and escapades she had behind my back while I was with her for almost five years. Manipulation on a whole other scale I've never experienced and will never experience again in my life. I am still healing.....If anyone is curious the name of the book is called : "Mi Perverso y Yo" by Paola Maldonado
After listening to this vid: God, my narc ex-bf is a devil! How can a person BE this way. my lord. =_= he slowly was isolating me from everyone I knew to the point where all I would need is HIM. And he actually said that to me where basically I would only need him for advice and comfort, etc. and he got mad at me because I was confused about that reality and questioned it. He said if we were married we only depend on eachother and NO ONE ELSE. 0_0 we werent even married, yet alone engaged, and he also wanted to know my bank pin # and my soc-sec #.
Taking advices here ha lol
he pops u every blue moon ...but i just ignore him. i guess he realize he losted a good one.thanks to mommy.
A horror story I went through. I wish this video existed 3 years ago.
Lived it.. exactly as u call it. Pathetic but all true
I watch patterns with my narc
I wish your app was free
Ok bro
Your discussion in this video is uncanny, as it applies to my somewhat different situation. I met someone online who owns a You Tube roller coaster enthusiast channel. I’ve known him for over a year but we’ve never met in person. He used to give ❤ reactions to my comments on his travel vlogs, but started ghosting me several months ago while still giving these reactions to others on a given post. I have finally had to unsubscribe from his channel because it has become too toxic to deal with. He is in a heterosexual marriage but I believe he may be either bi or gay. Do you think he’s a narcissist?
Yes, I think he is. I was ghosted by my former boss and by my property manager and it feels terrible. I'm sorry you experienced this too.
Nah! I am one step ahead of him. No moss growing under my butt. I put him in his place when needed. He hates being ignored!
It’s funny cause you look just look my boyfriend. It’s like a textbook on how to date him.
Sorry not to be a pain but… Intro is too
Long.. 3
Minutes of the 11 min clip.. and you do this with all your video’s. Your info is great! but I usually or often swipe to another content creator cause the intros are toooo long I think most people who follow you and listen to you already know everything you say on your app and program and new ones can find the info in your bio….
Totally agree. New ones M-F it’s much shorter :)