Abraham Hicks How to let go someone you love

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  • Опубликовано: 28 окт 2024

Комментарии • 280

  • @SuzannaK12345
    @SuzannaK12345 13 лет назад +177

    I had a similar experience. I learned that you must never chase after what you want because that sends a signal to the universe that you don't have it yet and you are supposed to feel like you have it already; so what you chase will run away. But when you set an intention for it to come to you and you believe it is yours and you let go of any resistance, it will come to you.

  • @DerekMarmon
    @DerekMarmon 11 лет назад +116

    "Let your desire for relief be more important than your desire for Fred," that is soooo helpfu!!!

  • @rgeorge1536
    @rgeorge1536 8 лет назад +274

    To the wonderful lady who asked this qs ... Thank you so much for having the courage to ask this qs. A big thank you from all the girls out here who are releasing our own 'Fred'

  • @slick_Ric
    @slick_Ric 10 лет назад +75

    the girl asking questions is adorable

  • @businesslady7840
    @businesslady7840 4 года назад +5

    She sounds so cute when she asked "why the universe gets to decide that Fred isn't for me?....like the inner child came out 🤗

  • @clairobics
    @clairobics 11 лет назад +56

    by letting go and releasing all expectations of others, you come home to yourself

  • @Delisle4
    @Delisle4 11 лет назад +50

    Powerful!! Exactly what I needed to hear. Like the woman who is talking, I am also weary of hanging onto my own "Fred" and chasing after him and trying to control the situation. I want to let go and be free and just relax and live my life. At this point in time, I want my headspace back and relief. I can let go and trust in the universe to bring me someone better than "Fred" as I float leisurely downstream. Thanks Abraham, you rock!!

    • @Mattressmoney55
      @Mattressmoney55 4 года назад +1

      I have a "Fred". 😬

    • @Delisle4
      @Delisle4 4 года назад

      Time to let go...

    • @lukuslukus5576
      @lukuslukus5576 3 года назад +2

      Its been 7years, how have things worked out for you? Any advice for someone who feels hopeless right now? Hope you see this and that you are doing well!

  • @annettedillon3233
    @annettedillon3233 5 лет назад +20

    When you are weary of something you are getting ready to stop the struggle

  • @sarah1sasha2
    @sarah1sasha2 10 лет назад +74

    We live out the pain of rejection and neglect we experienced as children with those we idealize in our present...desiring them to be the one to relieve us from our Pandora's box full of childhood pain. Letting go of anyone being our "fix" is releasing the struggle against feeling our grief from childhood. If the "universe" is orchestrating anything, it is allowing us to accumulate situation after situation that will remind us of what still lies waiting for our very own attention within us...that no "Fred" can do anything for. The fear and denial of our personal grief leads us to many spiritual paths...just like this one that teaches us to bypass it by using mental affirmations and beliefs. As we use these ways, we continue to neglect and reject the child within us waiting for someone to care about her swallowed grief.

  • @Mia-fl9on
    @Mia-fl9on 11 лет назад +77

    The amount of times I have watched this over the years has been outstanding. And every time something different resonates with me. This can be applied to any desire. Love it!

    • @Lorob854
      @Lorob854 5 лет назад +1

      Mia OMG THIS IS THE BEST VIDEO EVER

  • @xlightable
    @xlightable 11 лет назад +49

    I need а relief more than I need a f...ing Fred!

  • @slick_Ric
    @slick_Ric 10 лет назад +15

    "you have to let your desire for relief be greater than your desire for ______" is probably the most important part of this talk, also

  • @inspirediam
    @inspirediam 12 лет назад +13

    "Why does the universe get to say Fred's not yours?" LMAO!!!!

  • @jelizabethpetrie6656
    @jelizabethpetrie6656 5 лет назад +13

    Exactly let divine timing take over. It’s so much more delicious!❤️ Let go, let god.

  • @raysbrain
    @raysbrain 10 лет назад +54

    This just helped me immensely!!! I have had my own "Fred" for some time now and I am constantly getting in the way and have been having such a hard time of letting go and trusting..I always feel this need to act and try to make things happen..thank you soooo much for posting this!!

  • @RockOn21Sarz
    @RockOn21Sarz 5 лет назад +8

    I manifested red balloons last week. I tested the universe. Every spare thought I had, I thought about red balloons. The next day, when I walked past a playground a little girl accidentally let go of her balloons and they flew into the sky- a blue one, a white one and a red one. And I thought "There it is. Cool! It works".
    Halfway through this video, I notice what's in front of my face- the picture attached to this video. And it's a good lesson for me today: "Get out of your head and stop swimming upstream". Thank you Universe.

  • @blinddatereject
    @blinddatereject 9 лет назад +22

    this girl really reminded me of myself with her situation. such a great video!

  • @LoveLife-ho3rg
    @LoveLife-ho3rg 5 лет назад +11

    I begged for a sign from my spirit guides and this is it!! So much wisdom, I feel much more enlightened! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

    • @Lovethemedia
      @Lovethemedia 5 лет назад +2

      Me too!!! This is why Im here today lol. Amazing

  • @TruNordics14
    @TruNordics14 10 лет назад +36

    My single biggest regret with romance are the beautiful ones I passed on because I was still hung up on an ex, or hung up on an "in limbo" situation. When I think of what I've passed on... shakes head and sighs.

    • @Coyotelover100
      @Coyotelover100 10 лет назад +2

      Yep. Why oh why did I not find Abraham Hicks teachings when I was in my 20's. At 51 all I can do now is regret as I see I did it to myself. ..... shakes head and sighs.

    • @tintrach
      @tintrach 10 лет назад +6

      Coyotelover100 it's NEVER too late,,,,stop sitting in the negativity of the past and decide today to move ahead, move on, and reach for those better feeling thoughts. They WILL manifest, or the regret and bad feelings of the past will manifest. Your choice!

    • @WholeLifeCrisis
      @WholeLifeCrisis 10 лет назад +3

      Would you have gotten over the exes more swiftly, or thought about them with more positive intent to get them back with you in a happier place?
      I'm at this crossroads now. I want the girl. I want the specific person, just in a happier way.

    • @kathygaines8197
      @kathygaines8197 10 лет назад

      This is one of the best video's l have read.
      If only I can do it

    • @tenilleadimari8576
      @tenilleadimari8576 5 лет назад +2

      @@WholeLifeCrisis same boat 😏 how did that work out for you?

  • @diosdelencanto
    @diosdelencanto 11 лет назад +7

    When you stop feeling like,"I need it and I can't live without it," which is a feeling that has a lot of resistance than you stop it from manifesting. But whey you stop feeling needy, stop feeling the yearning or the wanting and give it up and drop it, you actually end up getting out of the Universe's way and then it ends up coming and your like I gave up wanting this sometime ago why did it come, and it came because you game up the resistance when you gave up needing, yearning or wanting it too

  • @SherryM614
    @SherryM614 11 лет назад +2

    "Flowing free is what you are after." ... Yes Yes YES!

  • @CorndancerHawkeyes91254
    @CorndancerHawkeyes91254 5 лет назад +18

    AND IT IS A VERY GOOD FEELING WHEN IT DOESN'T MATTER!

  • @stayingyoung50
    @stayingyoung50 13 лет назад +4

    This one of the best I have ever heard on relationships.... was just what I needed!

  • @ralphrose1
    @ralphrose1 11 лет назад +16

    wow I needed to hear this..& I thought I was crazy for holding on to this 30 yr marriage..

  • @skfhdsjknldgfv
    @skfhdsjknldgfv 4 года назад +2

    These videos stress me out and never make me feel better.

  • @kaiaevert
    @kaiaevert 12 лет назад +6

    I asked the exact same question of the THEO Group back in April and was also told to "let go" essentially but have struggled to really understand what that truly meant. After listening to this a light bulb went off and I am so happy to finally GET IT! What a relief. And its so simple : ) Thank you so much...(EXACTLY what I needed to hear as well).
    Hugs!

  • @mycreativefreedom
    @mycreativefreedom 13 лет назад +2

    I've been learning these same kinds of lessons, and the universe even gives you signs along the way. Only proves that it's real. I was even mailed a book, random, by a friend that was all about this guy who could create his own reality. He couldn't be united to his soul mate unless he let go of the attachment. Great stuff.

    • @sarahfoster1529
      @sarahfoster1529 6 лет назад +1

      mycreativefreedom I know this was 6 years ago, lol, but do you remember the bane of that book?

  • @tinamessier1869
    @tinamessier1869 8 лет назад +5

    This speaks to me too. I felt the same way she did when she wanted Fred and the thinking of taking some action. I have to listen to this on a regular basis to remember the lesson.

    • @california3716
      @california3716 8 лет назад

      me too how is it going for you, it seems a daily challenge still because even as I am more in alignment and happier but I find myself not open to wanting someone else, I really would first want to see if I could work it out with someone I previously loved

    • @california3716
      @california3716 8 лет назад

      but I really struggle with when I am at a place to take action? is thinking of him and having all positive feelings for a while an indication?

    • @DanielleFiers
      @DanielleFiers 8 лет назад

      Tina Gagnon isn't this so powerful! I too took premature action and realized it wasn't inspired because of the results! That's when I went looking for what to do next & found this!!! Float on!!!! This was wonderful!

    • @tinamessier1869
      @tinamessier1869 8 лет назад +1

      I still don't have him but I still try to stay positive about us. Without taking that action I noticed he comes to me or at least he's flirting with me more strongly. We were together and he gets self conscious of people seeing amd hearing us, especially because he's in a committed relationship. I know, what I'm I thinking, but he already revealer his feelings to me a few months ago by kissing me twice and telling me 'give it time'. He open up the gates to let me know I'm not in fantasy land with him. I'm just going downstream as much as I can. Listening to Abraham helps me move to my Vortex and go smoothly downstream.

  • @mjonleo
    @mjonleo 10 лет назад +11

    What amazing words. It's hard to let go of something loved or infatuated with a certain person. Infatuation can be very manipulative and deceiving. There can be resistance on the opposition side, rather from the self; so the thought of that already is creating tension and resistance to that thought of infatuation after the love or before it. Amazing speech and discussion. Loved every bit of it.

    • @yasminegr
      @yasminegr 10 лет назад +2

      Exactly!! Infatuation pushes whatever you want away from you, not towards you....this is why you LET GO...

  • @streetglamtv5937
    @streetglamtv5937 4 года назад +1

    This girl is me. I am going through this exact scenario. I appreciate her asking Abraham this and I too can relate to feeling tired.

  • @Smjourney1223
    @Smjourney1223 5 лет назад +1

    Wow!! Fantastic example of how to let go. Yes!!

  • @jonouvell7900
    @jonouvell7900 11 лет назад +5

    live is supposed to be fun!
    I love it.

  • @CD-ct6fc
    @CD-ct6fc 2 года назад +2

    Here’s what happened to me. Three years ago at my old job I met a guy. The attraction was mutual. I lost that job or the idea I was going to be with that guy. A few months later I ran into him at the store and he admitted I was his office crush. See, when you don’t expect it, it comes. However, at that time I was in a relationship and could not get involved. He told me I was beautiful and from those few words I built a whole fantasy in my head. We had to go our separate ways, but there was not a day I did not think about him, literally hoping and obsessing. Three years down the road, now free and single I decided to take what I thought was inspired action and rang “ Fred’s buzzer”. The guy responded politely right away saying he’s in a committed relationship and very happy. Oh bummer! I had decided to swim upstream instead of letting the Universe orchestrate a chance meeting. I was impatient now I have deal with the consequences. In retrospect I do not regret the action that much because at least I know that 1) he’s not available right now and 2) he knows that I am interested. Now I just have to work on detaching which is very hard. I still have the desire, but I cannot obsess. The whole house of card crumbled down. I am appalled at how much time I spent thinking about this and forcing manifestation. Some videos suggest to write down your desire 300 times or what not. I’ve come to believe that does not help. It creates more anxiety and impatience. Just let go and let God, the good old saying ❤️ Love to all who are trying to manifest a relationship. What is meant for you cannot be lost, it will come back to you, and if it does not, it is not your fault. It’s just not your person.

  • @marasegal1849
    @marasegal1849 11 лет назад +15

    It is so hard to let the flow carry you when you so badly want what you want.

    • @roxannelucky
      @roxannelucky 10 лет назад +14

      I have found that when I want me to be happy more than I want them/it, I can flow more easily. SO I focus on my feelings and I find feelings that make me feel good. Blessings to you!

    • @marasegal1849
      @marasegal1849 10 лет назад

      Thank you, Roxanne. Namaste.

  • @kapital.q9754
    @kapital.q9754 5 лет назад +3

    The best I have ever heard...........

  • @tinamessier1869
    @tinamessier1869 8 лет назад +3

    I felt the flow and I could tell I was floating downstream just recently (yesterday, 10/15 and Friday, 10/14) and that was by listening to Abraham's lesson on this video. Now today (10/16/16) I want to text him but I'm stopping myself with massive willpower so here I am listening to this video again.
    I loved that he contacts me without an excuse (work stuff) especially after work hours. This is what I want...the building of our attraction and feelings to each other, but I want more with him. But now I am like a heroine addict and want more with him NOW! Now I understand how drug addicts feel to get that next high and how to get it.
    The video from 7:00 to the end is what I need to hear in a loop in my head.

  • @sarahbeth7440
    @sarahbeth7440 4 года назад +1

    I wish I would have found this gem much sooner, but I am more so grateful that I have finally found truth and guidance from this particular video to soothe myself the way my inner being needs and desires. Thank you for sharing your gift to us all. You are amazing and special!💜

  • @Delisle4
    @Delisle4 13 лет назад +1

    This is EXACTLY what I needed to hear. I am constantly offering resistance towards this guy I met and I am weary of controlling the situation and getting stressed about the whole thing and getting worked up about whether this guy likes me or not. My higher self lead me to this video so that I could learn to take a step back, let things happen and just go with the flow. Feels good. Thank you higher self and thank you Abraham. You always know the right words to say at the right time. Namaste

  • @saraiwongkaew2113
    @saraiwongkaew2113 4 года назад +2

    I love headline topic. It hit me😁

  • @troniv5178
    @troniv5178 5 лет назад +2

    This is just what I needed to hear this young lady asked the questions I wanted to ask the universe was definitely Getting me together with this ..Abraham is heaven sent 🙏🏾

  • @yourheartissmiling1111
    @yourheartissmiling1111 4 года назад +2

    Funny oh so funny girl! Love it and glad I never needed or wanted a Fred tho. Strive for being happy alone it's so worth it

  • @LittleLJ22
    @LittleLJ22 12 лет назад +1

    Is this GENIUS or WHAT?! Love it.

  • @FreLanceVideos
    @FreLanceVideos 9 лет назад +7

    This was absolutely amazing

  • @sparklebox11
    @sparklebox11 12 лет назад +1

    It is not about having no expectations (Fred) but rather detaching your emotions from your expectations

  • @Moochie589
    @Moochie589 11 лет назад +3

    i am experiencing exactly this and woke up so frustrated today about him for no reason even though for the past month i have been so eager, satisfied and excited for him to reappear into myreality.. having an off day :(

  • @veronicahaney3145
    @veronicahaney3145 7 лет назад +3

    Allowance = Faith

  • @kathleenwharton2139
    @kathleenwharton2139 4 года назад

    Let go of the need to control! I love it! I love this guy..but I can let go of control!

  • @gaylem.3185
    @gaylem.3185 5 лет назад +5

    Omg thank you for this . I'm learning everyday 😂😂

  • @slick_Ric
    @slick_Ric 10 лет назад +1

    and also "when i see the perfection of this [whatever thing] i won't ask 'are you _____?' because it won't matter" ...man that was good

  • @cheyennes
    @cheyennes 11 лет назад +4

    the ending really put it together for me I believe yes often the good traits you find from each relationship will accumulate in the partners you find this has been a general experience for me however, I've only been in 2 serious relationships. The truth is though or at-least I believe is it's important to allow that person to leave your mind when the relationship ends as soon as possible.

  • @mirerito
    @mirerito 9 лет назад +5

    This... is exactly what I needed to hear. Sharing on FB to the Abe Hicks group. Thank you very much!

  • @yoequalsoy
    @yoequalsoy 11 лет назад

    the work is the fun part! the tingle of anticipation is so sweet

  • @wavehorsee81
    @wavehorsee81 12 лет назад +1

    YES.........its such a great feeling, when you see the help turn up so specifically, i love the buzz...you got that piece of help because you instantly believed that you would get it, and it came as quick & as strongly as in accordance with how you had faith that it would! YES........I had to transcribe into my note book, every word if this piece...

  • @icic5
    @icic5 11 лет назад +1

    God brought me here!!! Had to hear it externally to for it to sync in

  • @ninninin656
    @ninninin656 12 лет назад +1

    I'm not always a fan of the Abraham material (too materialistic and selfish), but this was really awesome and super helpful! I am totally stuck in this "he is my perfect soulmate, how can he not see this/not be my lover yet" cycle, so this was a real boost towards better thought patterns! Thank you Abraham! :-)

  • @SherryM614
    @SherryM614 11 лет назад +1

    Love this message!!! Abraham is so brilliant!

  • @Rachael5922
    @Rachael5922 11 лет назад +1

    I love you Abraham Hicks!

  • @YourPotentialReveald
    @YourPotentialReveald 11 лет назад +4

    once you decide you don't need it, that is the exact moment that it will come.

  • @rajefferson76
    @rajefferson76 11 лет назад +6

    If you want something and don't care to get it, it's ok if I get it and it's ok if I don't and really be detached to it, then it's guaranteed to come.

  • @motogp2375
    @motogp2375 9 лет назад +1

    Exactly the way she said it. Dont resist the flow of the current. If it was flowing you would be in the happy land by now. In other words, if theres a resistance it obvious its not working so just move on and go with the flow and the right person will come along. If im wrong pls correct me.

  • @fedouat5085
    @fedouat5085 10 лет назад +1

    This is so incredibly perfect

  • @istina4720
    @istina4720 4 года назад

    Wow. This is everything right now. Thank you to everyone involved in bringing this to me at this time💛🙏💛

  • @robinsings
    @robinsings 10 лет назад +6

    this is good.. thank you so much for posting this.

  • @Sussana13
    @Sussana13 2 года назад +1

    Why in a world I would let go of someone that I love? People don’t be stupid! If you love someone - be with them!

    • @seancasey6793
      @seancasey6793 Год назад

      Love is a two way street Sussana. If the love is not reciprocated, then you need to let go and focus on you.

  • @Holmnielsen-
    @Holmnielsen- 11 лет назад +4

    This girl is adorable.

  • @jeanhill9450
    @jeanhill9450 4 года назад +1

    My love for you is eternal

  • @Pepexist
    @Pepexist 8 лет назад

    Here we go, and you telling me to be joyful by your assumtions

  • @liafaith1
    @liafaith1 11 лет назад +1

    absolutely perfect timing!!!!! thanks

  • @ZEITGEISTism
    @ZEITGEISTism 11 лет назад +1

    GREAT COMMENT and good for you for getting better and better Freds !

  • @cherylcribb7774
    @cherylcribb7774 5 лет назад +1

    This is a great way to explain it. Xx

  • @mizprican
    @mizprican 12 лет назад +1

    Simply amazing!

  • @bamboosa
    @bamboosa 10 лет назад +96

    Who is your soulmate? Look in the mirror. Duh.

  • @francinemillar736
    @francinemillar736 4 года назад +1

    Love it...many thanks ♥️🇨🇦

  • @ladyk2002
    @ladyk2002 3 года назад

    It will be your desire ..and it won't matter if its Fred.. love

  • @reneekaitaiyanna467
    @reneekaitaiyanna467 5 лет назад +2

    Off topic, just wanted to say thank you
    Abundance is rolling in and I'm working with contrast at work. I appreciate the tutalage, listening to this....cause I'm totally in love with someone that is in my vortex yet not in my today. Maybe I will see him in the physical tomorrow.

  • @TahjaiBassum
    @TahjaiBassum 11 лет назад

    she's adorable :)

  • @Fauna987
    @Fauna987 9 лет назад +1

    Wow! Thank you so much. I just loved listening to this whole thing, but the ending was truly inspiring!

  • @peacefulleagle
    @peacefulleagle 5 лет назад +5

    7:56 trust the process

  • @federicarota7255
    @federicarota7255 9 лет назад +3

    Amazing Esther I LOVE YOU.

  • @msmiley00
    @msmiley00 5 лет назад +1

    This is beautiful ❤️ thank you for sharing with the world.

  • @neildattani1436
    @neildattani1436 10 лет назад +20

    My ex broke things off with me a little over six months ago. Since she broke up with me and is still single makes me feel that the universe wants me to fight for her. I know she doesn't have any feelings for me anymore but I still want her badly. I guess I need to stop wanting her and the universe will replace her?

    • @WholeLifeCrisis
      @WholeLifeCrisis 10 лет назад +9

      Hopefully she'll be replaced or renewed. I'm in the same place. I don't want to let go of the ideal in my mind.

    • @mjonleo
      @mjonleo 10 лет назад +9

      IT's tough when things like this happen and we can not control it, we just have to let them go. The depression of it makes us remember, when we are constantly in a place that makes us remember. The good idea would be to step away for a while and run with the flow and do the things you truly love that make you feel happy. It's hard to do things alone, but at the same time it is easy. We have to cross train our mind to fight for what is right, but we have to cross train to also Let Go.

    • @frostednails
      @frostednails 5 лет назад +4

      I’m in that place now. I wonder, how are you guys now? What did you do to let go of this?

    • @harveymedia7
      @harveymedia7 4 года назад +2

      @@mjonleo this was well put, so grateful i came across your statement from so many years ago. know that this helped a person during an uncomfortable time

    • @mjonleo
      @mjonleo 4 года назад

      @@harveymedia7 Thank you so much. I hope you feel better. It is so great to know that I helped you during a difficult time,

  • @stupidflounders
    @stupidflounders 11 лет назад +2

    'Why does the universe get to say Fred's not yours?' Lololololol too funny

    • @Lorob854
      @Lorob854 5 лет назад

      stupidflounders lmao!

  • @lovablealexa7839
    @lovablealexa7839 4 года назад

    I release so I can receive! Thank you beloved spirit guides specially you Abraham thank you my beautiful Angels thank you channel the Goddess within me blesses all

  • @OceanGodis
    @OceanGodis 12 лет назад +1

    I SO NEEDED THIS!!! THANK YOU!

  • @gingerly5822
    @gingerly5822 4 года назад +1

    12:02 ❓👁❓👁❓
    Best question ever heard about creating‼️
    How do I know if I’m in my own way❓
    How do I know if I’m out of the way❓
    How do I know it’s working❓
    So g👀d 🙌🏼

  • @007lluvia
    @007lluvia 5 лет назад +1

    Thank you This is Amazing !!

  • @247Gang
    @247Gang 9 лет назад

    i needed this. Downstream attraction is the way to go

  • @Cowpunkgirl2
    @Cowpunkgirl2 11 лет назад +1

    I love this!!!!!

  • @ToreeLoves
    @ToreeLoves 9 лет назад +1

    this is exactly what I needed to hear... thank you.

  • @elainemoranville8121
    @elainemoranville8121 Год назад

    Choose relief. Niiiice.

  • @djcrow1738
    @djcrow1738 2 года назад +1

    You don’t let go of one’s you love. If you let them go you didn’t love them in first places 💔💔💔 And I wish I would’ve known that 10 years sooner. Because I will never love like that ever again

    • @seancasey6793
      @seancasey6793 Год назад

      The exact opposite is true. If you loved them, then let them go. If they ever loved you, then they may return to you someday. It's best to focus on you and be kind to yourself.

  • @ecko3003
    @ecko3003 12 лет назад

    lmao! the long silence afterwards is epic

  • @allenchica
    @allenchica 12 лет назад

    I am curious indeed... Abraham allways finds just the right words... Now I wonder if we'll ever know... Greetings to you...

  • @evamathew4371
    @evamathew4371 7 лет назад +1

    This is so good. ❤ Thank you. 😇

  • @harlemw651
    @harlemw651 10 лет назад +2

    Love. every. word.!

  • @AnnLouOrskov
    @AnnLouOrskov 12 лет назад

    WAAUUWW. Beautiful!! thank you thankt you thank you!

  • @jessica293031
    @jessica293031 12 лет назад +2

    Omg!! love this.... so cute :)

  • @twiggie7834
    @twiggie7834 12 лет назад

    vibe that impression of rhythm duet: a wise old good witch, mellowly low 'n patience with rich experiences, advises to her high pitch, little wild heart grand-grand daughter. enjoy the music so. thanks for the performance.

  • @wavehorsee81
    @wavehorsee81 11 лет назад +1

    O, I so empathize what you've been dealing with....I just think I will not have to make any effort if the perfect person is gonna bumpinto me, and I hold onto that all the time

  • @prashantbhaskar4049
    @prashantbhaskar4049 12 лет назад

    love you ... abraham